I Am Going To Do An Ab Session With A Pro Mistress

[ajr1986]

Hello everyone, I had a general question about seeking a mistress online to do in person sessions with. I have recently contacted one close to where I live and they are interested in doing a session with me. My only apprehension is the legalities of doing this. It is understood that no sexual contact is to be taking place, but I would still be paying for sexual gratification and to me that seems awfully close to seeking prostitution. I am just picturing a scenario in my head where there is a big police sting and i get arrested. This mistress seems to have a very legitiimate website and testimonials from former clients are all excellent. It is just I have way 2 much 2 lose and this is my 1st time taking my ab/sissy side to the next level...........If anyone could please write back on your thoughts or concerns, i would greatly appreciate it....thank you very much!

[timmyc]

lots of people have seen Pro Dommes, I doubt you have anything to worry about. Are you in a relationship, I would be more concerned about getting caught by your lady than the cops, if you are in a relationship. I personally think you would get more satisfaction meeting someone who enjoys it too, not someone just trying to make a buck. If a reputable pro mommy works for you, I say go for it.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I don't know, to me I look at it that I'm worth more than having to pay for it.

On a side note, dating and courting is prostitution of the legal variety. you're just buying her love instead of staright up paying for sex.

[Angela Bauer]

Welcome to Daily Diapers. How fascinating that instead of introducing yourself you have asked a controversial question that has previously been answered here many times. Well, every new member starts somewhere.

I am one of several experienced attorneys who are Daily Diapers members. You say that you have much to loose, apparently if others discover your dealings with a professional mistress. You say you are an adult of 24 and we have no reason to doubt you. You also are coy about your location. Laws vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. In a few places, and under certain conditions, it is not illegal to pay a prostitute. That would require in such a place you follow all the rules.

In most jurisdictions within the USA prostitution is not legal. "Soliciting" an act of prostitution rarely is a felony, but unless legal it will be a misdemeanor. It is always embarrassing to defend yourself on a charge of soliciting prostitution. It will also be expensive to hire an experienced criminal defense attorney willing to handle a prostitution charge. Oh, add the fee for a bail bond, which starts at 10% of the bail and can be even more expensive.

Solicitation is when you discuss price and services directly with the prostitute. "Pandering" is almost always a felony. That is charged when you are caught making a deal with a pimp or agent for the services of a prostitute. For example, in California pandering carries a minimum prison term of 7 years.

It is reckless to assume there is any service a pro mistress could perform that does not violate prostitution laws. Anyone who tells you differently is not qualified to practice criminal defense law.

Of course prostitution goes on in every community and is not frequently investigated and prosecuted. Are you feeling lucky?

Okay, so you have read about the pro mistress you discovered. She has endorsements from satisfied clients, all named John. Just because this mistress has spanked or paddled many naughty adults does not mean she will be a satisfactory adult baby "Mommy" "Nanny" or "Babysitter" That is frankly a long shot.

Carefully consider all of this before you make any offer to pay money in exchange for the services of a pro mistress.

[Diapers4Me]

Nice reply Angela!

Question....how do all of these Craiglist "escorts" get away with it? They claim that you are paying for a date, and if she decides to have sex with you, that is her choice.....I assume this would get laughed out of court???

[Angela Bauer]

Nice reply Angela!

Question....how do all of these Craiglist "escorts" get away with it? They claim that you are paying for a date, and if she decides to have sex with you, that is her choice.....I assume this would get laughed out of court???

Recently, as a result of legal pressure from the attorneys general of several large states, CraigsList has toned down ads for sexual services. Perhaps the murders of a few "working gals" who advertised on CraigsList brought the issue to public attention.

Most prosecutors are faced with far more crimes than they have budget to bring to court. They need to pick battles. Often it comes to which crimes get media attention. CraigsList was always on the edge of the law, since nearly always the activities of "escort services" can and have been prosecuted as violations of prostitution laws. Then one person murdered two different women he hired as prostitutes through CraigsList and tried to murder a third.

[Toddler Pampers]

Yeah, I would not do this unless I could independently verify a satisfied customer. You want to know, as best you can, two things. First, are you likely to realize the pleasure you seek? Just because some gal calls herself a pro, and maybe she is, at some things, doesn't mean she knows how to deal with our kind. Yes, they claim to have it all covered, but it must be hard to go from whips and racks to diapers and cuddling.

Second, is this 'provider' content to take just $250 or so, or are you going to be blackmailed and have to keep paying? It is my firm and forever belief that even people from the general community think ABDL is extreme, and its discovery ruinous. If we're not viewed like drug addicts by goods suppliers, we're viewed as easy marks by service providers.

Angela might agree, this gal could be hooked up with a dirty cop. She gets you to agree to pay more than agreed, or the guy comes in through the door to the adjoining room, and arrests you. For what, you complain. Well, for something, and you go to jail on mere 'probable cause'. Your case gets kicked months later, after lots of people in the prosecutor's office have a good laugh, and maybe you've paid a lawyer $500 because you've heard it's foolish to represent yourself, and besides, you've got to be at work, not taking time off to go to court, where your case is routinely held over because the cop (remember that guy?) had to chase a bank robber at the last minute.

Oh, and are you good with a tranny for your mistress? Need to be good with your gal being a guy because that's a real possibility.

No. I just wouldn't do this unless you really TRUSTED.

No, I really wouldn't do this at all. Just way too much could go wrong. Instead, date a girl who you feel might help, be really good to her, and don't pay directly for having your needs met.

[ajr1986]

Thank you all so much for your kind replies! I am very sorry for not introducing myself to this beautiful community. My name is Alex and I am a 24 year old male. I have been into diapers ever since the age of ten when i tried on one of my baby cousin's diapers. i think my attachment to diapers and being a baby overall stem from a lack of nurturing from my mother. She was always one of those you have to be tough moms and i was always punished for crying or showing any kind of weakness. So, with an upbringing like that one could go 1 of 2 ways...the first being a total alpha male badass tough ruthless manly man......or......being completely weak and submissive and longing for motherly affection (i chose the latter...duh!). So anyways that is my story and i hope to become more and more active in this community...thank you!!!!!

[fideliuscharm]

Solicitation is when you discuss price and services directly with the prostitute. "Pandering" is almost always a felony. That is charged when you are caught making a deal with a pimp or agent for the services of a prostitute. For example, in California pandering carries a minimum prison term of 7 years.

Carefully consider all of this before you make any offer to pay money in exchange for the services of a pro mistress.

Out of curiosity - at what point would seeking a pro-Domme/mommy etc be considered solicitation for prostitution especially if no overtly sexual activity takes place - ie penetration, oral/genital contact, etc.

[Angela Bauer]

Out of curiosity - at what point would seeking a pro-Domme/mommy etc be considered solicitation for prostitution especially if no overtly sexual activity takes place - ie penetration, oral/genital contact, etc.

From your question I assume you are not an attorney. Have you studied the various laws of your state with respect to prostitution?

Hardly ever is it necessary for the prosecution to prove any of the acts you mention took place to sustain a charge of prostitution.

Explain how a pro mistress can change the diaper of a client without genital contact?

Of course you can believe what you want. Prostitution in many places is not the type of crime that receives high priority enforcement. As I said before, Do you feel lucky?

The OP asked if what he wanted to do was perfectly legal. In my legal opinion it is not legal. As an officer of the court I have a sworn duty to advise against paying a pro mistress.

[Toddler Pampers]

As I see it, the legal issue of prostitution is down the list of concerns, below practical issues liked being dissatisfied, ripped off, and generally taken advantage of.

I have to say, I'm a little disappointed with Angela Bauer's counsel. I'm a lawyer, too, but I don't mention it every chance I get. If you came to me and wanted to know if seeing a dommy mommy was prostitution, my advice would be strictly practical. Honestly, there are so many pits to fall into before you even get to the legal issue, it's all but irrelevant.

P.S. Anybody who crows about being a lawyer is a narcissist. Lawyers are a huge part of a very sleazy, mismanaged system. I practiced for about 30 seconds before I wanted a long hot shower. It's very hard to be a lawyer and be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

[Angela Bauer]

As I see it, the legal issue of prostitution is down the list of concerns, below practical issues liked being dissatisfied, ripped off, and generally taken advantage of.

I have to say, I'm a little disappointed with Angela Bauer's counsel. I'm a lawyer, too, but I don't mention it every chance I get. If you came to me and wanted to know if seeing a dommy mommy was prostitution, my advice would be strictly practical. Honestly, there are so many pits to fall into before you even get to the legal issue, it's all but irrelevant.

P.S. Anybody who crows about being a lawyer is a narcissist. Lawyers are a huge part of a very sleazy, mismanaged system. I practiced for about 30 seconds before I wanted a long hot shower. It's very hard to be a lawyer and be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

I have never made a secret of being an attorney, going back to my first article in the DPF Newsletter in 1990.

Clearly the two of us disagree about most things. The funny thing is we might have met at an ABA function. Such are the ironies of life.

By the way, do you disagree with my advice about prostitution?

[Toddler Pampers]

You've never made a secret about being a lawyer, Angela, for twenty years. Precisely my point!

Do I disagree with your advice about prostitution? Yes, somewhat. A dominatrix is not a prostitute; BDSM is not inherently sexual. But, like I said, you can get all tangled up with the legal system and never have done anything wrong. All it takes is being accused.

[Angela Bauer]

You've never made a secret about being a lawyer, Angela, for twenty years. Precisely my point!

Do I disagree with your advice about prostitution? Yes, somewhat. A dominatrix is not a prostitute; BDSM is not inherently sexual. But, like I said, you can get all tangled up with the legal system and never have done anything wrong. All it takes is being accused.

Clearly the two of us have widely differing views about communication with the members of Diaper Space as well as criminal defense law. I am sure each of us has a base of fans here. I get enough negative messages I am well aware I am not universally loved. When I started writing for DPF there were some of those members unwilling to accept women as actual adult babies. Such is life.

You might not understand that I do not participate here or in any AB/DL/Incon site for self aggrandizement. I am up-front about being an attorney so that those who dislike attorneys can stop reading if they want. My firm only handles corporations, so I hardly write here in an attempt to drum up clients. In my responsible adult mode I help make rain for my firm in conventional and ethical ways.

You are entitled to have kept your profession secret. I have faith you have your reasons. It is hardly a secret that the two of us are far from being the only ABA members into AB/DL. Some are as open as I am and some do what they can to keep it a secret.

One of my goals since I joined DPF 20 years ago is to help others feel they do not need to be afraid of their incontinence and/or infantilism. If knowing I have a good career doing what I love, practicing corporate litigation, makes some happy, then to me that is a good thing. Sure there is a risk some folks will make jokes about an attorney in diapers. Let us face the fact that a percentage of the public distrust attorneys. Do you seriously think my writing on AB/DL/Incon sites created these attitudes about the legal profession?

What would fascinate me is for you to share some citations of cases on which a professional dominatrix, charged with prostitution, has successfully been defended on the basis that BDSM is not inherently sexual. Perhaps my own research is faulty, but I have never found such a published case. More to the point, the OP asked about paying a pro mistress to serve his AB needs. That would be outside the scope of BDSM. Are you advocating that so long as the pro mistress does not change the client's diaper there was no act of prostitution? Would that be the basis of a defense?

[curiositykilledthecat]

crack the whip and hit the books?

Sorry just felt like adding my two cents. hope that ,ade you both smile.

[DL88]

Lets do away with lawyers and settle everything with bare knuckle fighting.

In all seriousness though, if you are seeking advice like this then listen to Angela, you'll be better off in the end.

[AbriForm]

To be honest, while I love picking apart legal issues, I want to hone in on this one (to the OP) is from a different perspective.

I have completely struck out in the dating world, and that includes ABDL. I've had people who are totally, 100% opposed to prostitution actually suggest it to me as an option.

It's fake. It's not real love, it's not even a real scene. At least two **** buddies (censoring mine) care about each other before, during, and after. Prostitution is like buying a new video game and immediately turning on the cheat codes for all weapons.

Some people get off on doing that. I call that sick. If you want to pay for a prostitute to give you a baby bottle and do not-so-speakable acts to your diaper, go ahead. Odds are, you won't be caught. Police have better things to do, like bust people on the street who are much more likely to be engaging in other illicit behavior.

But, before you do this, just think. I've probably waited just as long as you have (in fact, being 24 myself, I can say that with confidence). I have no problem fantasizing at home and asking normal people out online, sans any diapers at all. The road you're going on is the one I sincerely would regret going down.

[Bettypooh]

Hmmm.... I'm torn on this one.

I don't see me paying for sex, though I'd pay for everything that led up to having sex if I wanted it bad enough Prostitution came about when a girl figured out that there are enough guys stupid enough to pay her a good living for using something she didn't have to pay for either Morally I think it's wrong- legally it is wrong in most places- realistically it happens and isn't going to stop. There's someone who advertises being an AB "Mommy" within my reach. The price is high but I've considered going there to have an AB experience just for fun- not for sex Why? I'm not AB but I want to see how experiencing that that feels and I want to have someone else (preferably female) change my diaper at least once before I die I could seek this person in RL but the chance of me finding anyone like that decreases faster than my downhill slide into old age. I still want a soulmate but I don't expect them to do more than accept my diaper wearing as a part of me. Even with my wearing 24/7, diapers are only one part of my life-not all of it!

As far as sex with a prostitute goes, many of them are druggies and they want their fix more than they care about being disease-free. I don't want a STD, especially knowing how prevalent some very bad ones are these days I don't want to open myself to being outed because I wouldn't pay blackmail If you still want to do it then be careful. Find several real references- not just one person and not some online words you can't really verify. Be smart and keep your private information very far away from this. And have a bail-bondsman's number handy just in case. Just saying....

Bettypooh

[diaperliz]

ajr1986: The safe thing to do imho is to take a trip to Las Vegas and hire a pro there. I am sure you can find an individual that has plenty of experience in this field. Obviously this poses the potential of being more expensive just with travel expenses, but as you put it you have to much to lose.

Toddler Pampers: The original post specifically asked about a legal issue... I guess I don't understand how you can take issue with Angela pointing out that she is a lawyer in this situation. Furthermore, since she has been up front about her profession for the last 20 years we can safely assume she really is what she says she is. I have yet to see Angela talk about her job at an inappropriate time.

[Repaid1]

ajr1986: The safe thing to do imho is to take a trip to Las Vegas and hire a pro there. I am sure you can find an individual that has plenty of experience in this field. Obviously this poses the potential of being more expensive just with travel expenses, but as you put it you have to much to lose.

Toddler Pampers: The original post specifically asked about a legal issue... I guess I don't understand how you can take issue with Angela pointing out that she is a lawyer in this situation. Furthermore, since she has been up front about her profession for the last 20 years we can safely assume she really is what she says she is. I have yet to see Angela talk about her job at an inappropriate time.

I'm no lawyer, but even I know Prostitution is Illegal in Las Vegas. The closest one is about 60 to 90 miles outside. If it were me I'd go to Colorado and go to Mommy Kat's. Who has a full nursery and is more than knowledgeable on the whole scene. Anybody who lives in this livestyle seems to me to be the one who would give the best experience for your money. Just say'n. I mean even in The legal parts of Nevada, you have to factor in first the plane flight from and to. Then the pricing with the girl you would want, the house unstated minuimum is generally $100, but the normal rate is $350 per half hour. Then if possible even finding out in advance if any of them have ever heard of this thing in the first place so you didn't waste all that money. I googled some of the sites and used the keyword "diaper" and received no hits.

To me a pro "mommy" seems the best avenue. Most have sites and real references within our community members. Legal or not, I still feel it's the best bang for the buck. (no pun intended or implied)

[fideliuscharm]

From your question I assume you are not an attorney. Have you studied the various laws of your state with respect to prostitution?

Hardly ever is it necessary for the prosecution to prove any of the acts you mention took place to sustain a charge of prostitution.

Explain how a pro mistress can change the diaper of a client without genital contact?

Of course you can believe what you want. Prostitution in many places is not the type of crime that receives high priority enforcement. As I said before, Do you feel lucky?

The OP asked if what he wanted to do was perfectly legal. In my legal opinion it is not legal. As an officer of the court I have a sworn duty to advise against paying a pro mistress.

It was an idle curiousity... *Shrug* no I'm not an attorney. but the courts here have recently struck down several provisions (I believe they're on a 30 day hold pending appeals etc.) regarding prostitution laws - fwiw - in ontario prostitution isn't illegal, its just most of the activities (till now) associated with it were - solicitation, keeping a common bawdy house, and living from the avails of to name the three that were struck down.

So the question is now moot.

[Toddler Pampers]

Hi Angela,

Not sure if you want to discuss the substantive issue with all the acrimony in the air, but perhaps.

I don’t feel that a diaper change amounts to prostitution. Yeah, it’s sexual, but is it sex? Where, exactly, is the problem? Is everything okay up to the point that the man’s genitals are exposed? Good until ‘she’ touches them? If he isn’t obviously aroused, is he okay?

Now let’s consider a situation where the facts are crystal clear: why it isn’t prostitution for Vivid over in the SFV to hire a gal to make a porno. Seriously, help me out here. That film seems like proof BRD of prostitution to me.

In a way, it’s apples and oranges, because, as I say, I don’t concede that a diaper change is sex, an essential element of prostitution.

TP

[jeremy12312]

I know several professional dominatrices (socially, not professionally), and at least in the State of California so long as there is no sexual act, it is not considered prostitution. In fact, People v. Freeman states "for [an act] to constitute 'prostitution,' the genitals, buttocks, or female breast, of either the prostitute or the customer must come in contact with some part of the body of the other for the purpose of sexual arousal or gratification of the customer or of the prostitute".

So if you're not in California, spend a couple extra bucks and head this way. I can even recommend some folks for you.

Angela, do you practice under that name? I can't find a record of an Angela Bauer with the State Bar of California, and I thought you said you used that name and lived near Los Angeles.

[dl_ashlee]

Legally I think it can be a sticky subject. Things can be twisted to seem they fit a certain law making what you did illegal.

This is why if you are dealing with cops if it looks that there plan is to arrest you then plead the 5th and they certainly will try to twist you into admitting to something. Also a very good tip is if they ask you to get out of the car is roll up your window, close and lock your door when you get out. Even if you don't have anything to worry about in your car they will have to get a warrant to search it if you say you will not submit to them searching your car. If they do anyways without your consent well specially if they don't find anything you could report them as you had your car searched without consent and they had no right to search your property without your consent or a warrant.

[BigBoy]

I want to throw out a question. If you are a adult film actress and are getting paid to have sex, is that prostitution or does having a camera there negate that?