How Old Should Your Mummy/Daddy Be

[Cid]

Hi there all after a recent conversation I discovered a difference of opinion about something so thought I would see what others think.

The question that came up was should the person in being mummy/daddy etc be quite a bit older then the person in the child/baby role so that it is possible that there are really there parent.

To give it some context it came up as a friend of mine who is about 3 years older than me has been playing the daddy role with/for me and my friend ask ‘who can he be your daddy when he is so young’ (may not be an exact quote but near enough )

This is in no way me trying to prove I am right as... well it is something that is up to you how you do it and who you do it with but just wonder what the general view is.

[lil_baby_wet_n_squishy]

I think it has more to do with the maturity of the person then their actual age. Although if that person is also your wife / husband I think it limits you to someone close to your actual age.

[fluff]

I'd be of the "you're only as old (or young) as you feel". So for me, I don't think it matters too much, at the end of the day you might be 18, 21, 35 or even 60 on the outside. But we're all 1, 2, 3 or 4 or 5 or 6 or whatever on the in. Theres realism, which might not be the best word, then theres realistic.

Sorry, thats loads of numbers.

I can see what you mean though. Sometimes it can be strange to imagine or have your parent figure be your real age equal.

[Cid]

Seeing as I ask the question I may as well give my answer. I am of the view that it really doesn’t make any difference. The whole thing is going on in your head anyway and is really suspense of reality so to make a big thing about one person age whilst overlooking the fact I am not really 3 yours old and have no physical need for nappies seem a little strange.

As long as the roles feel real i.e. the other person seem in control an makes me feel little and safe then it does matter to me if they are young than me, the same age or older. Plus if I am meant to being in the role of someone around 2, 3, 4 years old anyone that I would be ok with doing anything like this with would be old enough to be my mummy or daddy regardless of if in realty there is not that much of a difference in age.

And you make a good point that if you are also in a ‘normal’ relationship with the other person you are likely to want someone around own age for all the other parts of your relationship.

[sarah_ab]

Since it is a role playing scenario, you are each taking on the role you seek, so the caregiver, while physically may be young, is taking on the role of someone 'older' and while you as the baby may physically be older you are obviously taking on the role of someone quite young.

You should ask the friend, well by that logic than i certainly cannot be the baby, because i'm too old, just as he is to young to be my daddy.

[AutieAB]

if that person is also your wife / husband I think it limits you to someone close to your actual age.

Rubbish - I'm quite a few years younger than my wife (double digits).

In days gone by, most people established relationships with people they interacted with face-to-face, in bars, at parties, via friends and collegues, etc, and by virtue of that, partners tended to be around the same age. Today though, we have the internet and modern, open-minded attitudes to relationships (amongst the majority, at least). Large numbers of people (myself included) establish life-long relationships before they even see the other person in the flesh. This naturally opens the door to age gaps because the relationship is founded on shared interests, personality and the likes rather than on age, physical appearance/attractiveness and societal rules. Whilst some people cling onto old fashioned notions that age gaps are inappropriate (which IMO falls into the same category of discrimination as those who condemn mixed-race or same-sex relationships), most people are more open-minded these days.

To drag myself back on topic and down from my soapbox, although my wife is not a 'mummy figure' (she wouldn't want to be), I've sometimes wondered if at least a small part of my sub-concious decision to enter a relationship with somebody older than me was driven by my AB side. I reached the conclusion, though, that it's either not at all relevant or only very slightly. Some ABs have wonderful mummy/daddy-figure relationships with partners around their own age and that's all to do with the willingness and open- or like-mindedness of the parent-figure, not their real age.

[boy ricky]

I don't think it generally matters. My Daddy is 2 real years older. I have had people be Daddy with me that are 10 and 20 years younger. It was awesome for me and them. Its all about who you are. If you behave and act like the lil one, its easier for the "Daddy" to be Daddy. The same goes the other way.

It works well for us.

[Letluvsrool]

I'm going to play devil's advocate here and voice what I'm sure will be a somewhat unpopular opinion. I feel that a large age difference between two people in any sort of sexual scenario including the topic of this thread is kinda creepy and in some cases downright exploitative bordering on pedophilia. If one person is well into middle age while the other is 18 or a couple years older, then it becomes quite obvious the older person's attraction is selfish and shallow; their true attraction has nothing to do with relating to someone or whatever sort of rationalizing nonsense they may use to convince themselves and others that what they're doing is okay. They merely desire young flesh. It becomes especially repugnant when the older person uses their age and life experiences to deceive the younger person into thinking the relationship is based on something other than pure physical desire. (ie older people are much better at lying)

I'm sure I've stirred up a hornet's nest with this one, but I stand by my words. If "age is really just a number" then all the creepy old farts out there would be just as content to play Daddy with someone their age rather than constantly trying to hook up with teenagers.

[sarah_ab]

I'm going to play devil's advocate here and voice what I'm sure will be a somewhat unpopular opinion. I feel that a large age difference between two people in any sort of sexual scenario including the topic of this thread is kinda creepy and in some cases downright exploitative bordering on pedophilia. If one person is well into middle age while the other is 18 or a couple years older, then it becomes quite obvious the older person's attraction is selfish and shallow; their true attraction has nothing to do with relating to someone or whatever sort of rationalizing nonsense they may use to convince themselves and others that what they're doing is okay. They merely desire young flesh. It becomes especially repugnant when the older person uses their age and life experiences to deceive the younger person into thinking the relationship is based on something other than pure physical desire. (ie older people are much better at lying)

I'm sure I've stirred up a hornet's nest with this one, but I stand by my words. If "age is really just a number" then all the creepy old farts out there would be just as content to play Daddy with someone their age rather than constantly trying to hook up with teenagers.

for the most part i agree, as a person who at a young age routinuely slept with older men and women, however, in the rare exceptions such as myself, the young person is just in it for the sex and ends up being the one 'using' the older person.... but that is a very rare case, my best friend is dating a man who is almost 20 years his senior, they have been together for almost three years now however and are quite happy.

but in hindsight i can see how creapy it is for a much older man/woman to be seen in public cuddling up to a much younger man/woman. BUt sometimes, it does work.

[AutieAB]

BUt sometimes, it does work.

Indeed it does

[belinda_sue_fox]

All mothers should be eighteen and have the body and looks of a super model. When things start to slip, downgrade them to scullery maid and have them live and wo*k in the cellar.

[babytommy1981]

IM really 28 my wife/mommy is 21. and theres nothing wrong with that. as im playing the age of being 2 -3 yrs old.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I'd imagine it is all relative to the role the individual is comfortable with.

[abisme]

i'd say at least my age, maybe afew years older

[grh0321]

My feeling with this discussion is,it shouldn't really matter to TRUE age,as long as situation works out between both parties.

[curiositykilledthecat]

I'd be uncomfortable dating an 18 year old and having her wantr to take the mothering role, however I'm a switch so yeah not the end of the world. I just want a damn woman at this point.

[Aleia]

I would want my Mommy to be no less than 2.5-3 years older than I am. Young enough to be attractive and fun to hang out with while we're not role-playing, but old enough to have the advantage in wisdom and experience. A maternal, nurturing, protective personality is the most important thing--I'd want someone who naturally assumes the mother role even when we aren't role-playing. And it has to be genuine--I want her to actually be concerned about my comfort, well-being, and dryness.

[baby-dandan]

I'd probably want an older mommy but not more then ten years. If the opportunity for a younger mommy/baby girl came up I wouldn't mind that either! I just think an older mommy would be more practical for me.