College Life

[Tokka]

So I'm a college freshman at (location withheld due to paranoia). I don't know if this is the place to go for a question like this, this is the first time I've really been willing to admit to having a problem. This is the most embarrassing thing ever. I've had diabetes (juvenile, type 1) for about 7 years now, first got diagnosed because I started wetting the bed a lot (because without insulin the body gets rid of sugar through pee and blah blah blah). Went on insulin therapy, and I like to think I've been keeping pretty good control of my blood sugars and stopped wetting the bed actually immediately after the diagnosis, which was great for my self-esteem.

Anyway, last summer lots of stuff was going on in my life and I was having to pee a lot more, and I think it was at least related to the diabetes; my blood sugar started sucking then because of a break-up, travel, starting college, all combined distracting me from taking care. I could control my bladder most of the time except at night, eventually wetting about three times a week, so I started wearing briefs at night (thank goodness my mother didn't take me with her to get them - I would have exploded in shame). It was a big push getting my blood sugar better, but the bedwetting stopped in August.

I'm at college now, living on-campus. My roommate doesn't know any of this. Actually we don't know much about each other at all because we both spend basically all of our time focused on our computers, it's a pretty work-heavy school. But... now I'm having to pee a bit more again, which is bearable except last night I was lucky and woke up just before letting go. This has me terrified. The smell would be noticeable and I really don't want to bother my roommate, much less admit something so embarrassing to him, but I can't imagine keeping something as loud as briefs unknown to him in the silence of the night. What should I do if things get worse?

[bjhst1149]

i would go buy something that doesnt make alot of noise, or else wear those crinkly pants to bed, that would hide the noise

[Tokka]

Crinkly pants, I like that idea, but I have no idea what you mean.

Now I think about it, another question- back when this used to happen I'd still leak out of the brief now and then. I don't really want to go online for this stuff, since having to pick it up at the university mail office would be hell too, but are there any reliable brands you can get at pharmacies, just over the counter? They seem to be a you-get-what-you-pay-for deal but even the expensive depends seem pretty unpopular here. Well, I'll look at the rest of the forum for that information.

[DiaperBoyKR]

A couple of notes/questions.

First, was your roomate selected for you, or is it a friend that you knew before you started college? I know schools that work both ways. If its someone thats known you for awhile, I wouldn't hide the issue, and tell him whats going on. Tell him what you are going to do to take care of it, and why you have to do it. He will probably be cool with it as long as you keep it quiet (i.e. not wearing openly out in the hall, in front of friends, etc.). If you didn't know him previously, this may be more difficult, but I would still recommend it, given that your wetting incidents seem to be somewhat stress-related, and I can tell you from personal experience, that freshman year of college is EXTREMELY stressful for a variety of reasons.

Second, you may want to find out if you school has a room open in the quiet dorm or in another dorm that has individual rooms. For most students who have a medical situation such as this, they will work to accomodate you so that you can handle your medical condition in privacy without having it aired in front of your peers. It may cost a little more in terms of board, but it shouldn't be a massive amount.

Third, if you want to order your briefs, that is the route I would suggest. I would recommend xpmedical.com. I ordered from them when I was in college. Even if you order a case, the order comes in a completely unmarked box, and even on the label has no notes or words on it such as "diapers, incontinence supplies, medical," etc. All the folks at the mail office would know is that you got a really big box. And if you're only using them at night anyway, that will give you more than enough supply for 2 months or so. I would recommend the Abena supers or x-plus (Xplus if you know you wet ALOT). They're good briefs and should help you keep things under control.

Last, don't keep the used diapers in your room, get rid of them ASAP. Even with odor control something would leak out and it will be noticable, even on a floor of other guys.

Hope it helps.

[Tokka]

My roommate was selected for me. I thought the problem was over with, because after it stopped again I figured, me, paragon of manliness, wetting the bed chronically? Poppycock and balderdash! Unfortunately here I am barely waking up in time to catch myself.

I've had one conversation with the dude in three days, and it was about if he wanted to go to a concert with me. It'll be really awkward saying first thing to him in a while and it being "I can't hold my pee at night." I mean, presumably there's a tactful way to bring it up, but heck if I can think of it.

I think I will start looking into a quiet room next semester or once I have a diagnosis. Don't know if the school has one, but I guess we'll see.

How quiet are the diapers (hate that word, so kiddish) you recommended? And considering how big some bags alone are, wouldn't shipping make it not worth it anyway?

[Alec]

1) keep tight control of your glucose

2) order one bag of abena x-plus from xpmedical at a time.

3) see if you can get a permanent locker at the fitness center and store your diapers/briefs in the locker. Take a few in a gym bag to your room every few days.

4) wear black or dark navy track pants to bed - they will hide noise, leaks, and bulk.

5) after you become better friends with your roommate and feel you can tell him, just store everything under your bed.

Hope this helps.

[AndB]

I'd definitely wear some cottone boxer briefs over the diaper -- putting a couple of layers of clothing between the diaper and the outside world helps muffle noise big time. Cloth like backing on the diaper helps too, so if you're leaning the X-plus route, get the Air-plus. Watch out though, the X-pluses are pretty thick dry and swell up considerably when wet. Just the price you pay for the best absorbency out there.

Mostly I'd say that you don't want to seem as if you're hiding something. Be discrete, but you need to do what you need to do. I don't think that there's any need to announce your problem, so I wouldn't say anything unless asked. I assume your roommate probably knows that you're a diabetic, and since this is a side effect of the diabetes, that's all that needs to be said.

[Repaid1]

"Expensive Depends"..hmmmm. Depends are about the cheapest (both ways) you can get. Anyway.. use the "expensive" Depends boosters.. they might help. "Crinkly" pants, I think means Nylon (Russel sounding)..but anyhoo. Get some lined plastic pants..most of the people "we" deal with will send them in a unmarked Mailer Pouch..no harm no foul..Nobody will be the wiser. Best of Luck.

[StenCoil]

I've been using Tranquility ATN briefs (plastic) or Tena Classic .. Both of those are less expensive than Abena, and seem to work fairly well, and are reasonably quiet. Vitality Medical online is one supplier, but they are available at many other sources.

Your roommate will know, though, whatever you do, so best be on good terms. If you come across as a genuine medical problem and not an abdl freakazoid, it will probably be fine.

Good luck!

[adriansurley]

Its really not that big of a deal - hide your diapers under your bed in or somewhere your roommate obviously can't see or go. When he goes to the bathroom or steps out or something just silently put the diaper on - or slip the diaper on underneath the covers of the bed - it muffles the sound a lot.

[dudewheresmyname321]

i'm not incontinent, but do live in a dorm, am a junior and wear diapers recreationally and can maybe shed more light.

First off, it's a bit embaressing, but get a room change. You know those singles everyone is always dying to get? They're pretty much reserved for people like you who have medical issues that require them to have a room alone. Go to housing or email housing or something and send in documentation that you have diabetes and they should help you. Get on that asap, as the singles fill fast, even if you have a legit medical reason for being in one.

The next thing...what type of dorm do you live in? For example, my college has dorms and suites. There's rooms of 2 and a common bathroom in the hall and a "gender neutral" bathroom we can shut the door on. For suites, its 3 rooms of two, and a single bathroom/shower. Take advantage of any single bathrooms in your building or on your floor that you can.

Last, you can deff hide diapers real well around your bed, and having them mailed won't be a problem. I've ordered bags and bags from my mailroom from xp medical. Its completely safe. The only thing the mail room will see is your name and the shipping label saying "XP"...nothing else. Even if it said something on it...who cares. Honestly...ur not very likely to run into the mail room people alot and they're not going to spend the time looking up what (XP) really means. They have hundreds of packages a day and just want to go home. Wearing one to bed tho, just be extra sneaky and wear pj's or boxers. Also, put a fan in your room and turn it on while u sleep. It adds white noise to your room thats good to sleep with and will mask those little ruffles.

As for diapers tho, its not real stealthy to wear ones with tapes. Look into it more, but I kno there are overnight pull up diapers that (may) work for you. You can slip them on and off in seconds, and under your sheets if your super sneaky. If you're shy...you can maybe ask ur roommate to leave for a bit as you change.... say ur still adjusting to college life or something and are still a bit uncomfortable with changing with another guy. Offer something in return, like idk give your roommate a couple hours with his girlfriend alone...say ull go out for dinner or study in the library. Its all about compromise.

The one big thing though...be proactive and positive. Get on the housing change NOW. Don't be paranoid thinking that one package going through the mail room will cause the entire college to kno you wear diapers. It'l be much more embaressing to pick depends up at cvs and have on of your college buddies see you walk out with a nice big green package of depends. If that happens, say its a gag gift. I've gone into stores and bought a bow with depends so if something like that happens, I have a clever story. Just stay positive and don't let this issue pass without action, cuz you'l be the one who's losing in the end.