Being Exposed

[boy ricky]

A list I joined posed a concern about the people in this SEX TV video, Nanny Lynnette's Adult Baby Birthday Party. You can see it on youtube here

The poster asked...

"Do you worry about being seen by non ab/dl(ie:from work, etc.) in a video like this? This would be addressed mainly to those who need to keep a separate serious life called work. I, for one, have never gone to an event like this. I am more dl,then ab.I would enjoy (love) going to one of these events, but would worry about the video getting out. I am not a politician, nor am I running for President (like Obmama / Clinton), but I would worry."

my response was

Thought provoking for sure...

Many of us would rather not have unwelcome attention. That said some don't mind it. I run a risk with my blog, yet it is somewhat minimal. It is not listed in search engines unless you are looking for it. I see it creeping in a few places but its not a huge worry.

I have youtube videos but you cant make out my face. The blog was started when my partner (daddy) and i were separated for a few months. It was to keep us close. It worked but in the process we invited many to look in on our relationship, primarily our daddy/boy relationship which is a very significant part of us.

It became a source for information, validation of ab relationships. I began to see it as a means of supporting others in our ab/dl communities. Thousands of emails, yahoo messenger chats later i am convinced it does help many people.

Many of the emails were too say wow, you are living my fantasy. Or I'm jealous of you, which of course is saying they want or desire to have something like we do.

Others ask practical questions, how to be a baby, how to really feel an experience you envision a baby has? What diapers to buy, how do i meet someone like you, how do i talk to others about this? How can I and my ab go deeper?

So though i don't really want some people to see my videos or the blog, I am prepared for that eventuality. I am in a position of being better able to risk this than many others due too many reasons.

So at some point i know someone i dont wish too, will see our blog. Its bound to happen what with up to 1,000 people a day going there. In the end the 1,500 plus emails each year and blog visitors validate my efforts and will lend me strength to make it through that day when it comes.

A boy's Life - and Adult Baby Info Blog

So my question; How would you feel (and then deal with) if you were exposed?

boy ricky

[Guest]

Not worried about it.

I'm a freak, I guess. I really just don't care who knows I've got a diaper on. Oh no! I'm in a diaper! OMG!

[tris]

Someone has to be an unofficial "spokesperson" at one point in time, and I'd gladly fill that spot! Part of me really appreciates an opportunity to make a positive difference, a statement to the truth that people are different, and we've all only got ONE life to live --why should I not be remembered? I want MY life to be the story of a man (well, boy to you and me) who blazed the path for others to do the same. A tale of a unique (and really really ridiculously good-looking) individual who endured pain, confusion and found solace in finding his place in the world.

Would I mind the attention? Nah. I might be nervous at first, but after the initial shock, I'm pretty open about me, myself and my life.

It takes time for movements to be started. At one point an island was a grain of sand with a dream, ya know?

[Army_Baby1]

I do wish somedays that someone would out me to the world so that I would not have to hide anymore. But with my job at stake there is no way that I can come out into the open and let people see who I really I'm right now. do know that in time my life will change and the world will find out, but till then I do not worry about what others think and I'm not going to worry about if someone does find out.

[tris]

I venture a guess that if you're posting from actual Afghanistan, you've already been outed.

[Army_Baby1]

Hello Tris

So far there is not many people that know that I'm into the AB world. There is my wife and the few people that I talk to online. But so far no I have not been outed, at least not that I know of yet. I have come close to outting myself, well the toddler almost outted me. lol. But so far there is not anyone that I know of out here that knows and I'm always questioning if they do know.

[Army_Baby1]

Hello Tris

So far there is not many people that know that I'm into the AB world. There is my wife and the few people that I talk to online. But so far no I have not been outed, at least not that I know of yet. I have come close to outting myself, well the toddler almost outted me. lol. But so far there is not anyone that I know of out here that knows and I'm always questioning if they do know.

[tris]

What I meant was that I'm assuming since you're not stateside, and you're in a country we're currently at conflict with, there's a chance that you're active duty? Being active duty you probably connect to the internet via US military lines, and if not, I'm sure your COs have a good idea of what you're up to. And I believe that sexual deviancies also count forms of "pornography". Aren't you supposed to be honoring the laws of Islam?

[Army_Baby1]

Tris

You make some good points in being exposed. First, I do not and would not dare to be on any site that might give me away on my work computer they have limited action they can take. The second part to it is that I'm on of the network admins for our civilan network out here so I know the physical sucrity, yes there is a log that can be pulled but the only people that have a right to it is CID(Crimal Ivestagation Divison) and they would only be looking for other things. As for the pornography, that is true that we are not allow to have any form of it. I do not know if they would count the stories here as that and I really do not think they would sit down and read all them to be able to make that decision.

What I do worry about thou is a good health and well fair as I do have diapers out here. If they are found there is nothing I really can say to them besides "WHAT". I know better then a lie as it would lead to more trouble, and the truth would not really help either. If it was to come out I guess it would be up to a quack and my CO.

Yes you are right that I'm active duty and have been for the last 8 years. As for diapers being sexual, I do not think so, but they could always be taking that way. You are right that being outted could be dangours to my health, but I also think that if it is meant to be then it will hapen or as I was thought "So Mot It Be".

Yes it is true that I'm here and suppose to honor the country that I fight and their beliefs even if they do confict with mine. But I have not found anything in Islam faith about wearing diapers. I break the Islam rule thou when I do my prays tho. It is funny how we follow the rules that our enemies do not. If they are given the chose they will hide behind their friend and shot at us, or even blow themselfs up and the people around them just to make a point.

Oh sorry about the double post, system here goofed and I hit refresh not knowing that the data was sent.

[Eric D]

Interesting topic & question,

I'll try to answer it in three parts... so bear with me for a moment, will ya.....

as I've stated in various other posts I am not an AB - I'm attracted to diapers, diapers only and in quite a sexual way often but sometimes just for protection.

Keeping that in mind, it would make attending such an event a less possible scenario, but let me say that if one of my friends would be an AB and would invite me to his/hers AB party and I'd decide to come ...

1. exposure - unwanted exposure.

if someone would ask me whether I'd like to talk to the "public" in form of a video about it, actually being filmed wearing a diaper or doing related stuff - well I'd for sure decline, I'd do so in a good mannered way, but I'd still decline the offer.

I never liked being photographed or filmed - I'm a very private person, and I like it this way.

if someone would start filming and "accidentially" would have me on film, well I'd ask him/her to delete the scenes, right away - if he wouldnt' comply it might become ugly. Honestly - I most likely would first firmly demand that the scene showing me would be removed, and if the filmer doesn't comply I would go QUITE FAR to get what I demanded, and if I have to take the tape by force I wouldn't care - don't get me wrong, I would try to solve this in a civilized way, but if the filmer wouldn't feel like complying, then I would be willing and well capable of taking "extreme" measures.

I'm not running for president, but I consider my SEXUAL Fantasies and my Diapers a VERY PRIVATE thing - heck if someone notices a diaper when I wear outdoors, no big deal - he/she most likely would think it's medical (after all I don't show 'em off)) - but on such a "party" - it would be rather "clear" that it is for a different reason.

Btw. I would act the very same way if someone would for whatever reason get a chance at filming me and my girl at having plain vanilla sex - it's my private business and no ones else...

2. Giving interviews (voice only) or writing "anonymous" texts (like on a forum)

No problem, no big deal - I wouldn't mind

3. Privacy.

Well I might be a "tad" paranoid about these issues (honestly a "tad" is a blunt understatement ). But I don't know what life has in store for me down the road somewhere... I'm not yet 30, I've maybe got another 40 years if I stay healthy and no accidents / whatever would happen... I can't guess whether one day I might go public, or what the political situation will become like, what some jobs will require - I simply don't know - and I usually don't care much. But filmed material like that before could be USED against my person, I could be blackmailed with such a film existing of me. Or less "drasstic" maybe I don't want everyone having a chance on getting such an insight in my private life.... I don't need my mom to know what my kinks are - not that she wouldn't love me, but she for sure would ask herself what she'd done wrong... I don't need her to find out something like that by "accident" or through someone who might find it by accident and feels a need to be all chitty-chatty about that.

I don't need a possible future employer to find something like that - even by chance.

and no matter how much some wish that this becomes a broadly accepted mainstream lifestyle, hell it ain't. And I'm not the one needing or wanting that, I feel just fine like I am. I can wear my diapers basically whenever I find it suitable. I do it in a modest way (I don't need any extra attention, I don't want any)... I do it in the same way most incontinent would wear diapers outside of their own place - discretely...

[rusty pins]

All good points Eric. I agree because I, too am a private person. I enjoy wearing diapers as a DL and even like to wear them under my clothes when I go out somewhere running errands. I usually wear the for out of town errands to lessen the chance that I might run into someone I know. Although my diapers are hidden under my jeans sometimes they do show out the back of my pants a little. Yes, I too do not want anyone I know to find out I like wearing diapers. It would make me very uncomfortable with friends, family and even coworkers. They have no need to know things like that. It's a private thing, like having sex with your wife. No, I can't see any good coming from anyone I know finding out I wear diapers and it would cause me more problems and humiliation than I would ever want.

[Cloth Diaper Baby]

I have an approach/avoidence outlook on being seen in my diapers. I love the idea of people seeing me in nothing but my diapers (once video-taped myself wetting my diapers while a comuter train full of people went by and you could see some of them pointing at me). But have also had to be careful because I had a fairly visisible position in one of the area's largest employers and was on the board of a local charity. I guess we each have to decide for ourselves how much risk is worthwhile.

Cloth Diaper Baby

A list I joined posed a concern about the people in this SEX TV video, Nanny Lynnette's Adult Baby Birthday Party. You can see it on youtube here

The poster asked...

my response was

Thought provoking for sure...

Many of us would rather not have unwelcome attention. That said some don't mind it. I run a risk with my blog, yet it is somewhat minimal. It is not listed in search engines unless you are looking for it. I see it creeping in a few places but its not a huge worry.

I have youtube videos but you cant make out my face. The blog was started when my partner (daddy) and i were separated for a few months. It was to keep us close. It worked but in the process we invited many to look in on our relationship, primarily our daddy/boy relationship which is a very significant part of us.

It became a source for information, validation of ab relationships. I began to see it as a means of supporting others in our ab/dl communities. Thousands of emails, yahoo messenger chats later i am convinced it does help many people.

Many of the emails were too say wow, you are living my fantasy. Or I'm jealous of you, which of course is saying they want or desire to have something like we do.

Others ask practical questions, how to be a baby, how to really feel an experience you envision a baby has? What diapers to buy, how do i meet someone like you, how do i talk to others about this? How can I and my ab go deeper?

So though i don't really want some people to see my videos or the blog, I am prepared for that eventuality. I am in a position of being better able to risk this than many others due too many reasons.

So at some point i know someone i dont wish too, will see our blog. Its bound to happen what with up to 1,000 people a day going there. In the end the 1,500 plus emails each year and blog visitors validate my efforts and will lend me strength to make it through that day when it comes.

A boy's Life - and Adult Baby Info Blog

So my question; How would you feel (and then deal with) if you were exposed?

boy ricky

[ric2]

i guess for me its about being discrete, I am a DL, so wearing out is not a big problem, because virtually no one notices (or cares). because I cannot wear them around my wife, wearing them out is virtually the only option.

i have told girlfiends, my sisters and my step brother, and a director at work, but its all quite abstract, you are not standing in front of them wearing nothing but a nappy, so my experience so far is that friends and most relatives (I would not tell my mother and step father, not because they are not loving or caring, but because I don`t think they would understand) are fairly accepting, because it does not affect them directly. With girlfiends and wives, it is a different matter, because they have to live with it. If you are lucky, you have an accepting partner, unfortunately my wife does not accept it which leads to tension.

I would not really want to be filmed, but would do an anonymous interview, and maybe a named interview in time. As previous people have said, I would not really want to be filmed in normal sexual acts or in my normal underwear either!

if directly questioned, I would and have discussed wearing nappies etc.

I think one of the most bizarre things is that you can be wearing a messy nappy (and normal clothes) and go into a supermarket toilet carrying a clean nappy and baby wipes, and no one will notice!

ric

[boy ricky]

i guess for me its about being discrete, I am a DL, so wearing out is not a big problem, because virtually no one notices (or cares). because I cannot wear them around my wife, wearing them out is virtually the only option.

i have told girlfiends, my sisters and my step brother, and a director at work, but its all quite abstract, you are not standing in front of them wearing nothing but a nappy, so my experience so far is that friends and most relatives (I would not tell my mother and step father, not because they are not loving or caring, but because I don`t think they would understand) are fairly accepting, because it does not affect them directly. With girlfiends and wives, it is a different matter, because they have to live with it. If you are lucky, you have an accepting partner, unfortunately my wife does not accept it which leads to tension.

I would not really want to be filmed, but would do an anonymous interview, and maybe a named interview in time. As previous people have said, I would not really want to be filmed in normal sexual acts or in my normal underwear either!

if directly questioned, I would and have discussed wearing nappies etc.

I think one of the most bizarre things is that you can be wearing a messy nappy (and normal clothes) and go into a supermarket toilet carrying a clean nappy and baby wipes, and no one will notice!

ric

Hi Ric

I think most people are where you are. None of us would appreciate being outed in a big or small way. Aside from those into Humiliation, yet most of that involves strangers.

I do have someone that is 100% behind my diapers so too speak. I have a Daddy and that is our relationship, even when we are out and i am behaving as an adult. I have the AB dream for many.

I have done anonymous interviews and have been contacted by a major Canadian television show. They delayed the issue for another time. In my work i have raised ageplay and adult diapers and diaper fetishes. Most people are accepting of the discussions but when faced with it I am not so sure they would be as understanding.

My work is in HIV prevention among gay bi and trans identified men. These sector is usually more accepting to people being different than the general population. I have branched out and now do these talks at POLY groups and for the BDSM community. I hope to do a ageplay talk for a large Toronto Fetish group this May or June.

For most people i would suggest it is important to be happy with who you are. If you love yourself you can deal with outside influences. If you accept you have a fetish or need for diapers or ageplay you will be happier and will come across as sincere if someone finds out. They still may not accept you or your diapers, but you will be less traumatised by it.

boy ricky

[ric2]

Hi boy Ricky,

I agree that it is vital to accept yourself as you are. it took me 28 years to do that!

It becomes a challenge again when your significant other cannot accept it as part of you.

ric

[boy ricky]

Hi boy Ricky,

I agree that it is vital to accept yourself as you are. it took me 28 years to do that!

It becomes a challenge again when your significant other cannot accept it as part of you.

ric

Thats the balance many have to deal with. Can you get your diaper or ageplay stuff on the side without informing your partner? Can you do it without feeling guilty? Can you do without? Can you talk to your partner and vcome to some arrangement either they are involved or they let you do it with someone else?

In the end it comes down to how am I going to be happy? Once you answer that question, you should know how to proceed.

cheers

ricky

[ric2]

Hi ricky,

Balance is the right word.

I can wear out and when away etc, but its going back to the the guilt, deception, and risk of lying, which I want to get away from.

Do I feel guilty? yes (due to the deception)

Can I do without? sometimes

I cant talk to my wife about it

and hence cannot come to a compromise

The nappy only option is not very palletable

The no nappy option is very difficult to achieve!

Ric

[tris]

Great points, awesome discussion and (again) +11ty billion infinity points to BoyRicky for sparking something really thought provoking!

In the end it comes down to how am I going to be happy? Once you answer that question, you should know how to proceed.

That's profound if you really let it bounce around in the noggin for a spell. I started my LIFE just by asking that question.

But how will you know when?

How will you really know that you're happy?

It seems to me that happiness is a lofty goal; some state of being reserved only for the numb, naive, sedate masses. When you make moves, you make waves and the ocean changes with you, infinitely. When you actively seek your happiness, it further eludes you, alluding you to believing its just around the corner.

When "Life, Liberty and The Pursuit of Happiness" was penned, some folks actually believed that America, and its people might achieve that ever-elusive state of existence so desirable that we live to pursue it even now, some 230 years later! I guess they didn't know just HOW right they were!

If you will always pursue happiness, how will you know you found it?

[boy ricky]

Great points, awesome discussion and (again) +11ty billion infinity points to BoyRicky for sparking something really thought provoking!

That's profound if you really let it bounce around in the noggin for a spell. I started my LIFE just by asking that question.

But how will you know when?

How will you really know that you're happy?

It seems to me that happiness is a lofty goal; some state of being reserved only for the numb, naive, sedate masses. When you make moves, you make waves and the ocean changes with you, infinitely. When you actively seek your happiness, it further eludes you, alluding you to believing its just around the corner.

When "Life, Liberty and The Pursuit of Happiness" was penned, some folks actually believed that America, and its people might achieve that ever-elusive state of existence so desirable that we live to pursue it even now, some 230 years later! I guess they didn't know just HOW right they were!

If you will always pursue happiness, how will you know you found it?

WOWSER, im rich now!!! All those points....

I guess the happy part is always something people think about, maybe even strive for. Perhaps what some do is to spend too much time doing things to achieve a societal view, the dominant perception of the norm. For example, that would be a wife, husband and two or three kids, a house, yard, financial prosperity and later grandchildren. That of course is a vision that comes out of the 50's.

In that world we feel uneasy not conforming. In fact we likely feel pressured to conform. The other aspect to that life is that you don't talk about sex, you are not gay, you are not a swinger and you turn red when someone says you look sexy.

Many set out to conform. Many do conform and pay an extreme price for doing so.

If you use diapers as a sexual fetish it maybe a little easier than if you involve ageplay or infantilism. Wearing a diaper for a sexual thrill is becoming more common within the fetish communities, fetishes like, BDSM, Leather, toe sucking, cross dressing, watersports, sniffing sneakers, you get the idea. Wearing Diapers, think about this, as a fetish is no stranger or absurd than the other fetishes i mentioned.

Still for it to be acceptable for you to discuss this with your spouse you have to be comfortable in discussing sex and fetishes. Most couples cant get into that discussion.

If you would describe yourself as an infantilist, then unless you get that baby time some of the time, you are going to be unhappy if you can not share it with your spouse.

Now back to the question of happiness. Do you feel deprived because you cannot wear diapers (have baby time), Do you feel depressed at times because you cant share this with your spouse? How often have you thought about talking with your partner about diapers (being babied)? Have you started to raise the subject of diapers (being Babied) or a fetish with your spouse and then stopped yourself? Is it fair to you that your spouse wont share the fetish/ageplay or let you indulge in it on your own or with someone else?

For me, not being the toddler/little boy would be darn near impossible. i would have to suppress a deep-seeded need/desire. So happiness for me would be on my own or with a daddy. As it is i have a daddy.

boy ricky

[superdiaperbaby]

I'll chime in here. I made an agreement with myself that if I was ever exposed I would stand tall and proud and explain how me being an AB has nothing to do with what I do. BUT I would not defend all AB/DLs because there are some very sick ones. I would stand for myself and my own diaper wearing but not the community. I don't consider myself part of the whole community like it "stands" for something, because we are all so different and I don't want to make anything "stereotypical AB/DL".

I am definitely unwilling to out myself or be outed because I have a wife to think about and everything I do affects her. BUT, I am in the local news sometimes and if a reporter was to be completely nosey they could find out about me being an AB and bring it up in an interview. Then I would have to stand tall for my actions and I would answer the question with trepidation and say how this doesn't matter with anything and try to move on. However, I don't think that a good reporter would out someone just for being an AB. There would have to be something else that happens to make it so. Good reporters need hooks in their stories and don't spread rumors based on one idiosyncrasy. There has to be something else that happens that accentuates being an AB, for instance if I outed myself or was a crazy astronaut. Sometimes I think we think of being an AB/DL as more of an issue than it really is. We obsess about it too much and it becomes this big "thing" in our minds that prevents us from living and stepping out and doing other things. Diapers are really a little thing. If we act like that, then coming out to family and friends is really easy.

SDB

[Guest]

So many hide from spouses. My God!

Am I crazy for always having had a "Love all of me or go away" attitude? I would never DREAM of marrying somebody holding back such a secret. God!

[ric2]

So many hide from spouses. My God!

Am I crazy for always having had a "Love all of me or go away" attitude? I would never DREAM of marrying somebody holding back such a secret. God!

Hi Diapered Witch,

You make an interesting point. Unfortunately life is not that easy.

I have only had two serious relationships in my life. I told both partners early on in the relationship.

I told my first partner after watching a channel 4 programme about fetishes etc, and there was one episode about adult babies and nappy fetishes etc. This went well, and she was really very supportive of it, recognising it helped me unwind etc. as my job at that time was quite stressful. she was the first person I told.

Part of my deal with myself, for accepting that I enjoy and want to wear nappies is endeavouring to be truthful about it.

When I first met my wife, I told her within 1 week of us first going out, so that either of us could pull out if uncomfortable with the situation. Her response is typical for her, which is to be accepting of it and making light of it... "is that all?" sort of thing. So everything seemed to be fine. At that time, because it was a new relationship etc, I did not have any real desire to wear them, and my wife did not ask any more about them.

As the relationship has gone on, so it has become clear that it is a taboo subject, and more importantly it reminds my wife of events in her past, which has nothing to do with wearing nappies, but alot to do with men and little children. This is a very unfortunate association, and I do not wish to aggrevate painful and powerful memories any further.

This led to me trying to give up, but has ultimately started to lead me back to a life of deception, which is not what either of us want.

The solution is difficult, because I do not want to give up nappies for myself, but for my wife, and this leads to resentment.

ric

[Guest]

See, I just have an "I'm me. Stay or go" attitude

[Eric D]

diapered witch,

you can hate, ignore, swear at, or do whatever with -me for the following response...

I'm not sorry if this comes off rude, but it's what I mean, after having read a few of your answers to some posts here. I'm not amongst your fan group to make it short - if you'd like to skip the rest.

well here it comes anyways.

1. Your attitude makes me want to puke - for 24 years of age, at least from what you write, I have to assume that some lessons of life have either gone past you while you have been busy with whatever else - or simply haven't paid any close attention to your surroundings.

it's not always black and white, it's not always nice & shiney - and the " fuck you if you don't like me attitude of yours", well - I'm not liking your comments and I usually find it ok if someone says "whatever" - but you seem rather "narrow sighted".

it's neither mature nor thought after what you write usually as comments to *some* matters

2. Besides I don't really get it what has made you to become a selfproclaimed sort of prophet about "outing" "not hiding" and similliar topics

I must wonder when you have stepped up so high on that lil' ladder of yours to look down upon others and seem to think that those who might think VERY DIFFERENT - for good reasons (like ric) - are just doing it wrong.

3. YOU ARE Entitled to your opinion, and you can shout it out loud every single darn time someone posts something about being uncomfortable for being outed, or if someone writes that he/she prefers to keep a part of ones life "private".

But whatever - I hope that you one day may come to realize that this "lil' shiney - black - and - white - I'm - on - the - top of- it -and always- right -world" of yours collapses just enough to give you a glimpse of reality.

cheers.

[Guest]

My last post in this thread, was just stating my point of view.

Only people hiding I look down upon are those who've married and not told their spouse. Sorry, but that's just deception.

If you're still hiding crap after marriage, you've got a problem and you're setting yourself and your spouse up for some serious pain.

Everyone else... Eh, you want to tiptoe around, go ahead.