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Author's note: It's been a while, hasn't it? Well, that's partly because I've been writing for Cushy Pen for the last 14 months, but the bigger part is because I went back to work full-time in November last year, so it's been all I could do to generate my minimum contribution there, never mind anywhere else. Nonetheless, this was a short I published last September, so it's clear of the exclusivity period and I can now post it here. Hope you enjoy! You Know You Deserved It 7:45am Mommy Tina sat quietly and sipped coffee as little Janet fumbled her way through her morning cereal. Janet sat there in her booster, naked but for a bib and last night's very wet diaper, the anticipation of what was coming completely overwhelming her, but still she did her best to be neat and tidy as possible. Mommy didn't like her making messes on "school days" like this, and she didn't want Mommy to be upset today. "Now you make sure and be a good girl today at school, get all your work done, so I don't have to hear any bad reports from your teachers," Mommy scolded. "School" was her job as a paralegal at Mayfair, Flowers, and Tarkenton. Mommy used to be a lawyer there, until she left to join the ACLU, so she still maintained friendships with Janet's bosses – the "teachers" in question. Not to mention, Mommy Maryanne was a partner there. Hence, if the twenty-five-year-old missed a deadline or fouled up a research assignment, Mommy Tina was first to know. Janet carefully chewed and swallowed her mouthful before she responded, "Yes Mommy." Speaking with a mouthful of food was definitely not acceptable behavior for a little lady, and Mommy was always chiding her when she did un-lady-like things. Except during playtime. Playtime was Janet's chance to just let loose and be as little and as silly as she wanted, and Mommy never punished her for it. Well, other than an occasional sit in the Naughty Chair for being fussy or throwing a tantrum. But throwing tantrums was fun too, especially after a bad day at School. But today was different. Mommy was quiet, and so was Janet, and Janet was on pins and needles about what was coming tonight. As beautiful and spacious as their 1-bedroom apartment at Thomas Circle was, Mommy said there wasn't room for what needed to be done here, and Janet knew she deserved it. Mommy had been counting up the incidents for weeks before, and once Janet crossed the threshold, what was to come was cast in stone. Janet shuddered as she considered it. That Mommy decreed it was going to happen at Black Rose, DC's most high-profile BDSM club, instead of here at home simultaneously thrilled and terrified her. She spooned up the last of her Lucky Charms, and Mommy smiled, rising to her feet. "Good girl. No messes. We need Mommy's help getting dressed today?" Mommy set the bowl aside and lifted the tray, then hoisted Janet out of her seat and stood her on the floor. "Umm..." Janet really wanted Mommy to dress her, but she wasn't sure. Would Mommy be happier if she started playing at Big Girl now, or... "Mommy's help it is!" The quandary was moot; Mommy latched on to her hand and tugged her down the hall. Mommy rarely gave her time to mull that answer. Either she was confidently feeling big, or Mommy treated her little. Staggering in her swollen diaper, Janet joyed over Mommy making the choice for her. Adulting was hard, letting Mommy take care of her was easy. A fresh, clean girls' Goodnite, a crisp white blouse, black knit wool skirt, hose, and stylish black heels later, Janet was feeling very big-girl indeed. Mommy tied her hair into a smart ponytail and did her makeup for her, and Janet was very careful to sit still through the process. Her last incident being fidgety while Mommy was doing her hair and makeup got her a sharp swat with the paddle, something she definitely did not want this morning. "There we go. Now, Mommy needs to get ready, and Janet needs to get her head right for adulting now, so I suggest we go sit and watch the news for a while, okay?" "Yes Mommy." Even though the instruction was toward readjusting out of littlespace, Mommy was Mommy in private company, no matter how big or little Janet felt, and accidentally calling her Tina at home had much more dire consequences than letting slip a "Mommy" in public, as embarrassing as that could be. She straightened up and mustered her most dignified stride, her heels clicking on the hardwood floor as she made her way to the living room. She sat on the end of the couch, carefully turning both legs the same direction, and reached for the remote. Inside, adult Janet was shouting down the giggling toddler-girl who just thought the whole exercise was silly. She hit the power button on the remote. The screen lit up. It was still on Cartoon Network from the night before. She stifled a giggle; Dexter's Laboratory was starting. Changing the channel to CNBC was a monumental effort of will, but Mommy had issued the order, and Mommy would be cross if that order wasn't followed. Squawk Box was on. Boring stuff about Wall Street. She pouted a bit, Dexter would be way more fun and interesting than this. "Big girl, Janet! Big girl!" she muttered under her breath. She focused on the screen. Texaco stock down, profits pinched by continued slumping fuel demands. Kimberly Clark stocks up as Huggies brand announces new Disney character designs on the entire product line. Janet unconsciously wiggled in her Tinkerbell Goodnite, delighting in the subtle crinkle... Ugh! Focus! Biotech stocks on the slide, consumer backlash against expensive prescription drugs driving bearish forecasts. Time Warner up, earnings outperformed projections thanks in large part to success of the Turner Broadcasting group's revamp of... the Cartoon Network morning lineup. "Dammit!" she whisper-shouted. Mommy expected her to be focused and ready for work by the time she was finished getting herself ready, but the distractions were everywhere today, especially in anticipation of what was coming tonight. "Dammit, dammit, dammit, Janet, pull yourself together!" Work. That's it. Need to focus on what was coming at work. Big case involving a patent troll suing one of their clients, she was sure to have a pile of research work on her desk related to that. And the SEC charges against their other big one, god, that was a huge, sprawling mess. Good grief, she was sure to be busy nonstop today. Probably have to work through lunch to avoid having to go in for overtime tomorrow. That'd be horrible, missing Saturday morning cartoons and... "NO NO NO!" she squeaked. Right at that moment, Mommy's heels announced her exit from the bathroom. "Someone having a little trouble?" Mommy stepped over to the kitchen counter and looked approvingly at the TV, then back down at Janet, who was doing her best not to fidget. Sadly, her best under Mommy's gaze and in this state wasn't much. "I'm trying, Mommy, I am! Even the TV's being mean!" "Come here, baby." Mommy's tone was neutral. Janet fidgeted even more as she stood and walked over, hands in a fig leaf in front of her skirt, head down, wobbling now on the heels she so confidently strode out in just a few minutes ago. "I'm sorry, Mommy. It's hard to adult." Mommy drew her into a hug, reaching down with one hand and patting her bottom. In heels, Janet stood barely five feet tall, and the nine inches of height between the two women always made Mommy's hugs extra comforting, pulling Janet's head easily into her bosom as she embraced her. "Mommy knows how hard it is. Trying to watch business news was a very adult choice. Good girl. What went wrong?" "Well, first they started talking about Huggies diapers, and they showed a clip of the commercial with the little girl with the pull-up on her head and all these pictures of Huggies Disney prints, and then later they talked about Cartoon Network and showed a bunch of clips of my favorite shows, and it just wasn't fair!" "No, it wasn't, was it. Mean old news broadcasters, trying to fuzzy up your head like that. Should I call Nanny, then, so you can be little today?" "No, Mommy! There's too much important stuff to do at school today!" Yes, Janet badly wanted to stay home and be little, especially if she got to spend the day at "Nanny's", also known as Mommy Racquelle's house, but she also wanted to be good. She knew what was coming tonight, and she didn't want to give Mommy Tina any reason to be cross or disappointed or anything else ahead of it. "I have to adult today! I have to!" Mommy released the embrace and grasped her shoulders firmly. "Look at me, Janet." Janet looked up. "It is up to you to be a big girl and go to school and make your teachers happy so Mommy can be proud of you. I know you can do it. You know you can do it. Will you do it, Chamita?" Chamita. The word gave Janet tingles every time Mommy said it. Mommy said it was what her grandmother in Venezuela called her when she visited her house. It meant babygirl, or something like that. When Mommy asked anything of Chamita, the answer was always yes. It had to be yes. Chamita could never refuse her mommy. "Yes, Mommy!" Janet stamped her foot for emphasis. "Good girl. Let's get Chamita to school then, so she can work hard and make Mommy proud." Make Mommy Proud. Yet another little key that unlocked certain secret places in Janet's heart. It was right up there with Good girl. Mommy had given Janet the option long ago to give up working and be little around the clock, her several mommies taking care of her, and as tempting as the offer had been, she knew that Mommy wanted very much for her to continue adulting. And Janet wanted it too. Giving up her job meant Janet would no longer have any control over how big or little any of her mommies treated her, it would become their decision, not hers. And she liked having that choice, even if she more often than not deferred to Mommy Tina, or Mommy Racquelle, or Mommy MaryAnne. It was fun insisting she was a big girl and having one of her mommies ignore her pouty demands and put her in diapers anyway, leaving her to sulk behind her binky in her playpen. But most of all, she lusted after Mommy's praise, and Mommy always praised her for going to School and working hard. Plus, she always looked forward to coming home and being little after a hard day of adulting, and that little joy would go away if she quit her job. So big girl it must be. The pair walked tall together out of the apartment, rode down the elevator, and into the waiting cab Bennie, the doorman, hailed for them just as he did every weekday. 8:50am "Okay, Chamita, be good girl at school for Mommy!" Mommy kissed her cheek and gave her a squeeze. "I will, Mommy," Janet whispered back sheepishly. For as many times as this exchange had happened, Janet had never gotten over being embarrassed about having the strange person driving the cab hear it, wondering about what thoughts were going through his head as he eyed her quizzically in the rearview mirror. She felt the soft blush creep into her face yet again as she hastily opened the door. She and Mommy exchanged waves, as they did every morning. Usually this was the moment where Janet was completely able to get back in big-girl mode, standing in front of the huge tower, three entire floors of which were occupied by her employer. Today was different, though. Today was a much bigger struggle. Today, she had to block it out of her mind, what was coming. Tonight. It was going to happen. She couldn't do anything about it. And she knew she deserved it. She mustered all the big-girl dignity she could and walked through the revolving door into the towering foyer. Again! Again! NO! Think about legal things. Think about precedents and case law and not about how fun it'd be to splash around in the big fountain right next to you! DAMMIT! Her pace quickened toward the elevators. She got there just in time for someone to hold one open for her, and there she was right in the front, in arm's reach of the buttons. She reached out to... Push them all! See the lights all light up! She tapped 7 and quickly pulled her hand away before she could get herself in trouble. Staring straight ahead, she smoothed out the front of her blouse and clasped both hands around her little handbag, trying to at least pretend her nerves weren't already frazzled. Focus, dammit! Focus! The war inside her head raged. She felt like she was chasing a tiny version of herself around a room while the little version was wreaking havoc everywhere. Make Mommy proud, remember? The words were like an elixir. The toddler quieted, and her focus returned, at least long enough for her to exit the elevator and into the sea of cubicles that was the paralegal pool. 11:05am Work had been fast and furious that morning, a never-ending stream of research, delivering briefs, making an occasional low-level client call, but Janet was keeping up with the pace. In fact, it was easier when she was busy, easier to tune out the noise and distractions. She'd been good all morning, even got a compliment from one of the partners about the brief she delivered for a class-action on which he was lead counsel. But right now it was all rushing back. This morning she had been grateful that Mommy put her in a pull-up, because this morning she was still very much in little mode, and she didn't want to be big yet. Now, as she sat in the stall with same pull-up around her knees, staring at the delightful little Tinkerbell designs while she tinkled, all the focus was gone, and it was only sheer force of will that kept her from giggling. She flexed her legs, determined to keep that pull-up from dropping to her ankles, the raw fear of anyone else seeing it the only anchor to "adulting" she had left. She finished and cleaned herself up, then slid the garment quickly back up her thighs. It was a certainty that everyone in this echo chamber could hear the crinkling, that they all knew she was wearing a diaper, that her "big girl" facade was a complete farce. It was as certain as the telltale little yellow stain in the middle, the little tiny dribble she'd left when she got so busy she almost forgot to go potty entirely. It wasn't a big stain, not even enough to feel so much as a swell once the soft padding hugged her girl parts again. But even if she didn't need to call Mommy Racquelle for a change at lunch, she'd see it this afternoon, and any chance she had of claiming big-girl status ahead of tonight's looming event was out the window now. Pee in her panties meant she wasn't ready for big-girl panties, which meant big, thick, crinkly diapers after School and on until bedtime. Part of her wanted to run upstairs and find Mama MaryAnne, tell her about her "accident" and that she wasn't feeling big enough to stay in school today. Janet once playfully called her "Ma" and claimed it was just easier than saying all those M's. While she was scolded severely for it at the time, MaryAnne decided that "Mama" was rather cute, and that became Janet's name for her. Mama would close her office door and give Janet a warm hug before calling Nanny to let her know that Janet would be coming early, and she'd be diapered and have lunch and a nap and be able to play until Mommy came to pick her up. But Mommy would be disappointed if Janet didn't stay in School. That was the last thing she wanted. So she bit her lip, straightened out her skirt, and exited the stall to wash up. Hold it together, Janet! It's only three more hours! You can do this! If anything, it was a mere 15 minutes until her lunch break, so she'd have a chance to gather herself, get refocused. After that it was just making it to 2:30. That was one of the more embarrassing, yet very pleasant aspects of having one of her mommies working in the same firm. As a partner in the firm, it was easy for Mama to pull strings down in the paralegal pool to accomodate Janet's "special scheduling needs", or more accurately the three women's collective desire to have Janet's schedule look more like that of a kindergartner. Where she went in at 9 and left at 2:30, her co-workers pulled 8 to 5. Her bosses never asked her to stay late, though she was occasionally tapped for Saturdays if the backlog was too deep. It was a compromise struck when Janet first moved in with Mommy, that Nanny get time with their babygirl on a daily basis, since she worked out of her home, and it came with the standing offer for Janet to abandon school altogether and let Nanny take care of her during the day. For Janet, the arrangement was dizzying at times, but she loved each of her Mommies very much, and she sorely missed each of them on the occasions she was deprived of one, like the week Mama spent in Boston, working with one of the firm's top clients on an important project. That was a really bad week for Janet; she tried to go to school on Monday, but knowing Mama wasn't in her office upstairs in case Janet had an accident or just needed a cuddle to get through the day made her nervous, anxious, completely unfocused. She wound up leaving work at lunchtime that day and every other day that week, and it it took nearly all the strings Mama could pull to keep Janet's job when she got back into town. That was the first time the three women spoke seriously about Janet "not being ready for school". After barely convincing them she was perfectly capable, Janet resolved to tough it out at work by whatever means necessary going forward. Janet was definitely in the "whatever means necessary" territory today. The anticipation of tonight's event had been building inside her for over a week, and now it was nearly unbearable, consuming her entire thought process, filling her with anxiety. She was rapidly running out of mental energy, and 2:30 seemed like eons away. 1:55pm Lunch had been no help. The self-imposed diet Janet was on made passing the snack machine an exercise in torment. It wasn't that she was overweight, far from it. It's just that she had picked up enough of a chest to where she could no longer fit comfortably into a girls' XL dress, and Target had this adorable pink one with Frozen characters on it that wasn't available in the girls' plus sizes Mommy usually ordered for her. She made Mommy promise her that if she lost a little weight, she'd get that dress, and she was almost to her goal weight of 95 pounds, and she could nearly fit back into her 32B, which would satisfy Mommy's insistence that she have a little room to fluctuate. Nanny always scolded her for being so skinny, but Nanny was also the most athletically built of the four of them, despite also being the shortest of her Mommies at a mere five feet four. Janet suspected Nanny could probably take either Mommy or Mama over her knee with little effort, whether they resisted or not. The thought made her chuckle, Nanny dropping her powerful hand on Mama's bottom while her impossibly long legs flailed helplessly. Janet just managed to finish the amicus brief she'd been called upon to draft that morning, and as she looked it over one last time, proofreading and error-checking as thoroughly as she could, she cheered herself inside. It was quite good, and she was sure today's "teacher", Mark Ainsworth, would be sending along very a very good report to Mommy. Her toes curled in anticipation as she saved the final copy then forwarded it along to him. Five minutes to go in the shift; perfect timing. She shut down her computer, gathered her purse, and made for the elevators, doing her best to maintain at least a pretense of professionalism when inside she was positively bursting again, toddler girl forcing her way back into her headspace. Normally she'd stop for a bathroom break on the way out, but she was determined to make her exit before she could be delayed by would-be small talkers, or worse be asked to come in tomorrow for extra work. The ride down seemed to take forever, stopping at every floor on the way, and her bladder began to murmur, ever so subtly. Janet had a dilemma now. On one hand, her pull-up was already stained, but there was a chance Nanny would give her a pass on such a tiny little dribble. Of course, it might not matter, Nanny could be in one of her moods, just looking for an excuse to give Janet the full babying treatment when she arrived, which Janet hate-loved and love-hated every time. And as much as Janet wanted to stay big for as long as possible before tonight's event, she also didn't. Being changed out of her big-girl clothes, diapered, and bottle-fed by Nanny, put down for a little nap, and playing in the playpen until Mommy came to pick her up was a positively delightful idea. The elevator finally stopped at the ground floor, and Janet walked out into the lobby completely on autopilot as she wrestled with these thoughts. The fountain finally made her decision for her. As soon as that tinkling sound reached her ears, her body betrayed her, and she blushed deeply, forcing herself to increase her pace and pretend nothing was wrong as her pull-up began to warm and swell between her legs. She had reached the revolving door by the time she was done; it wasn't that big of an accident, but it certainly removed all doubts as to what she'd be wearing shortly. She spotted Nanny's silver BMW sitting at the curb, and all the big-girl thoughts melted away as she jog-walked toward the car. She opened the door and nearly jumped into the seat, landing on the rustly puppy pad Nanny always laid out (just in case) with a gleeful squeak, pulling the door shut gently behind her. Nanny was very strict about slamming the door, and if Janet was going to spend the afternoon being little, she wanted it to be as pleasant an experience as possible. "Well hello to you too, cutey!" Nanny smiled as Janet's thumb found her way to her mouth. "I see someone is geared up for a little afternoon." Janet nodded her head fiercely and giggled. Nanny lifted Janet's skirt, which normally would have sent the smaller woman into a fierce blush, but "little" Janet only ever cared about modesty in the presence of strangers. Behind Nanny's dark tinted windows, the rest of the world ceased to exist. "Looks like someone had an accident today." Nanny's sing-song voice was scolding, but playfully so. Still yet, Janet felt the need to defend herself, thumb in her mouth or not. "Vat jus' happem, Nanny! Da foun'n made me do i'!" Nanny's made contact with the front. "Hmmm. Feels pretty warm. You sure we didn't have any other accidents today?" "Um... I had a li'l bribble before..." "I see. Thank you for being honest, sweetie. Let's get you home and changed before you wind up with a rash." Nanny watched for an opening, then scooted into traffic. "Are we excited about tonight?" The anxiety rose back up in Janet, and she dropped her thumb into her lap. "I'm scared, Nanny." "Oh I bet, you poor thing. This is your first time going to the Rose, isn't it?" "Uh-huh." "Well, how about Nanny fix you a nice bottle of chocolate milk when we get home, help you relax a little and take your mind off it?" "No chocolate, Nanny! My diet!" "Oh for heaven's sake!" Nanny rolled her eyes. "If you lose any more weight, I'll be able to put a harness on you and fly you like a kite in the park!" "Nuh-uh! Mommy's gonna get me the dress with Elsa and Anna and Olaf on it! I've only got a couple more pounds to go!" Her thumb found its way back into her mouth as Janet's thoughts wandered off to the animated movie with the silly snowman in it. "Good lord, you and that silly movie. Well, Nanny got a package in today with your name on it!" "Wa wuv in i'?" "Well I guess we're going to find out in a few minutes, aren't we?" "No fair!" Janet pouted behind her thumb. "No fair what? I only opened one of them, the one I ordered for you. The other one is as much a mystery to me as it is to you!" "Who wuv i' from?" "I'm not sure, it didn't have a name on it, but the return address was from Chicago, so that might solve part of the mystery." Janet's eyes got wide as she remembered the glorious two weeks she spent at "little camp" with her friends from the Chicago Ageplayers crew in May. And the even more glorious week she spent when she got home being constantly doted on and spoiled rotten by all three of her Mommies after them missing her "SO MUCH", as they told her day and night. She wondered who of her little friends sent her a package and why and what could possibly be in it! Or maybe it was another invitation! No, Nanny wouldn't have called it a "package" if it was just a letter. Mysterious indeed! Nanny let out a chuckle, breaking Janet's concentration. "Hey silly goose, we're home!" Janet looked out the windshield in disbelief. There indeed was Nanny's townhouse in Georgetown, a huge step up from Mommy's condo in the city. But that was a whole other reason Janet was determined to keep working, because she and Mommy were saving to buy a place like this. Janet's little paralegal salary at the law firm wasn't a ton of money, but it was enough to pay a lot of peripheral bills, leaving Mommy free to invest a huge amount of her paycheck. Another year or two and they'd be ready to live in a wonderful spot like this. Maybe even in the same neighborhood as Nanny. Then she'd get more time with both of them, and Mama too, as she lived just a few minutes away in an even nicer complex than this. "Are we coming in, or do we need Nanny to carry us?" Nanny snapped her back to reality again, this time a little sterner than her playful rib. "Sorry Nanny." Her thumb dropped out of her mouth, and she took Nanny's hand and stepped out of the open car door. "Our little head is just full of thoughts today, isn't it?" Nanny said, wrapping a comforting arm around her shoulder as she closed the car and locked it with her keyfob. "I guess so..." "Care to share?" "I was just thinking about your pretty house, and how someday soon Mommy and I are gonna have a pretty house near here too, and then I'll get to see even more of you and Mama, and it made me happy." "Aw, that's going to make your Mama and I very happy too. But you know what will make me happiest right now?" Nanny opened the door and ushered her inside as she spoke. "What?" "A certain babygirl toddling her damp little self up to her room so Nanny can get her properly attired for a fun afternoon together!" Nanny gave her a playful swat on the bottom, and Janet giggled in spite of herself. She kicked off her heels behind the door, glad to be rid of the cumbersome footwear, and dashed up the hardwood steps, stumbling once as her nylon-clad feet betrayed her. "Alright, alright, no need to fall and break your cute little bottom, now!" Nanny laughed as she followed her up the stairs. Janet scampered up to the landing and hooked a left into her favorite little spot in the whole house, Nanny's nursery. Of course, it wasn't a nursery for Nanny, it was for Janet. And it wasn't even entirely Nanny's idea. In fact, she'd only known Nanny for about a month when Mama and Mommy had conspired with Nanny to build it. But it was a magical little place nonetheless, and she'd spent a substantial part of every afternoon for the last six months here, and a fair number of overnights. The tall white crib stood out starkly against the soft lavender walls, as did the changing table across the room from it, with its little stepladder for her to "assume the position" on top. Not that Nanny needed any help; she was strong as a bear, and could easily carry Janet around one-handed when she felt like it. The walk-in closet was filled with clothes far more befitting a girl of four or five; Nanny was obsessed with expanding Janet's little wardrobe, and no doubt there was something new. Nanny was a bit proper, though; she refused to buy anything with cartoon characters or for that matter anything she didn't think befitting of "a little lady". Which meant everything Nanny put her in after School was absurdly girly and more than likely rather short, as it was intended to be worn with leggings, which Nanny never put on her. Too much fuss for playtime, was her constant refrain. And Janet would always complain that if she was to play dress-up, she should be dressed up proper. Then came the inevitable, "Who changes the diapers decides the rest of the underwear." Today was no different. Janet dutifully stripped away her skirt and blouse, Nanny arriving just as she started to wrestle down her pantyhose. She stumbled and fell backward on her squishy bottom with a squeak, and Nanny just laughed. "We needing some help?" "No, Nanny, you just startled me." Janet managed to get one leg free of the stretchy nightmare before Nanny bent over and grabbed the other one, ripping it loose effortlessly. "Honestly, I have no idea why your mommy insists on going to such lengths. Up up!" Nanny patted the vinyl-covered top of the changing table, and Janet quickly made for the ladder and sprawled herself out. Lying here, nearly as far from the floor as she normally stood, in a wet pull-up, made her feel about as little as could be. "Cause I'm 'posed to be a big girl at school, Nanny!" Nanny raised her eyebrow as she tore the sides down on the sodden underwear and began wiping Janet down with a warmed wipe from a tub attached to the table. "Do big girls do this in school?" Nanny dangled it in front of her for emphasis before wrapping it up and tucking it into the diaper genie. "I was on the way out already, and the fountain made me do it! I adulted good! And I worked hard all day!" Janet poked her tongue out in defiance. Nanny reached into her shirt pocket and produced a pacifier, which she tucked into Janet's mouth and went straight back to work. "Alright, sassy girl. Nanny believes you. But we're all done being big today, aren't we?" She wiped the Desitin off her hands as she spoke, and began dusting her with a generous layer of powder. "Mmmhmmm." The anticipation was still a mixed set of emotions for Janet. Big girl was fading fast now, as the sweet smell of the powder reached her nose. When she stepped out of that elevator, she was determined to stay big girl until tonight, but she'd expended so much effort at work trying to stay focused, and the nipple felt so good bouncing on her tongue, and Nanny's strong arm lifting her bottom up... it was hard to care about much of anything right now but being snugged up tight into a thick pink diaper, Nanny's fingers running along the leg elastics to make sure it didn't pinch. Oh, and what video she wanted to watch, since Cartoon Network was pounding that stupid Teen Titan show. Maybe Frozen again. Or Hotel Transylvania. That would be fun. "Are you going to lift your arms up for me, or are you just going to sit there like a silly lump?" Nanny stood there expectently, a lavender bishop dress in hand, two pink butterflies embroidered on the attached white bib. Janet raised her arms, silent but for her suckling and her bottom rustling. Yep, big girl was all the way gone now. Once Nanny had the dress over her head, Janet reached out for her. "Oh, we want to be carried? Well, it's a short ride to the crib," Nanny said as she pulled loose Janet's hair band and went to work on her face with one of the wet-wipes, stripping away the makeup Mommy had carefully applied this morning. "Mmm-mmm!" Janet squeaked. "No nap, Nanny! Movie!" "Your Mommy and Mama and I already discussed it. It's going to be a very late night for you tonight, and we don't want you getting all overtired and emotional. You're taking a nap, and that's all there is to it." "None of my mommies have to take a nap!" Janet crossed her arms and pouted behind her pacifier as Nanny dropped the siderail on her crib. "Your mommies all have to work, including me. In fact, while you're napping, I'll be finishing in a teleconference in my office. Believe you me, I'd rather be having a nap." "Hmmmmph." Janet played it up, but she actually was tired, just from the mental struggle today. Nanny handed her Avvy, her big stuffed unicorn, and hoisted her up with a rustle. Janet couldn't help but giggle as Nanny bounced her on her hip, betraying Janet's efforts at being rebellious, even if it was only passively. Nanny laid her in the crib, and Janet threw back another "Hmmmph," though with less conviction, as she flopped over and showed Nanny her back. Nanny swatted her bottom with a hollow plastic thud. "Sleep, baby. Nanny come get you when it's time to get up." She covered Janet with the throw. "Hmmmph!" Up went the rail, locking in place with a loud click. Such a comforting feeling, being surrounded by bars that came up all the way to her chest even when she was standing up in here. She suckled quietly and sighed. She was so sleepy by the time she realized Nanny had forgotten her bottle that she didn't even care as she slipped into happy little dreams. The next thing she knew, there was a hand on her back, and a soft voice in the room, but it wasn't Nanny's voice. "Hello, Chamita. Time to wake up now and get ready for our big night!" Her eyes popped open. "Mommy!" She flipped over, her pacifier and Avvy tossed aside as she lurched to a sit and looked up. Mommy startled a bit and chuckled. "Hello there, sleepy girl!" Janet was a bit surprised herself. If Mommy was here, then it was already six o'clock! And she hadn't even so much as heard Mommy drop the rail. She reached out with a squeak, and Mommy laughed as she picked her up. "Oh yes, baby, Mommy's happy to see you too!" "Nanny made me go ni-ni! I wanted to watch cartoons!" Janet put her fake pout back on, hoping to buy a little sympathy, or at least a reaction from playing her cute-card. Mommy just gave her diaper a squeeze, which was silly, because she was still dry, though that was probably going to change soon. "Oh yes, mean old Nanny insisted we take a nap, even though it was clear we needed it!" Nanny's laughing voice rang out from the doorway. "And she didn't even give me a ba-ba!" Janet pressed. "Meanie!" "Oh, Nanny!" Mommy gave her a squeeze. "No ba-ba before nap?" "Okay, you got me there. I'm sorry, Jan-Jan, I was distracted by that meeting I had to attend." Nanny stepped aside as Mommy carried her out into the living room. Janet stuck her tongue out at Nanny on the way by, and Nanny laughed and pinched her cheeks. "You're so adorable when you're grumpy, you know that?" "We goin' home for supper, Mommy?" Mommy sat down on the sofa and pulled Janet into her lap. "No, silly. All your party clothes are here, and you don't think Nanny would miss a chance to doll you up for an important outing, do you?" Janet's heart skipped a beat, and big girl came surging back. "Mommy! I can't go out in public in baby clothes!" She buried her face in Mommy's shoulder. "We've been over this, Chamita." Mommy lifted her chin and turned to face her. "You earned what's coming tonight. And you are going to be dressed properly for the occasion." "But Mommy..." "Hush." Mommy's finger went across Janet's lips. "Nanny, could we get a ba-ba over here, help tide her over until we eat later?" Inside Janet was roiling over the prospect. Terror was winning out over thrill. In public. In one of any number of elaborate party dresses Nanny had stashed in the closet. None of which covered her underwear. Would Mommy let her wear tights? Would it even matter if she did? Maybe it would on the way in and out of the car, but once they were inside that imposing place, a place dedicated to bondage and leather and dark things, to discipline of the fiercest kind. What would those people think, when they got a gander at her puffy rearend and her absurd piles of pastel-colored crinoline and satin and her curls and rosy cheeks? She was going to be made a spectacle of, and while the idea excited her when it was first announced, the closer it came to becoming a reality, the more afraid she was of it. She let loose a whimper and curled up tighter in Mommy's lap, her eyes squeezed shut. The crinkle in her bottom was no longer soothing, nor was her bladder emptying itself, swelling her diaper up and warming her thighs. A nipple entered her mouth, and Mommy whispered, "There we go, Chamita. Relax and drink your ba-ba." Those words soothed her. And a pull on the bottle, her mouth filling with chocolate Ovaltine, was exactly what she needed to forget the nightmare brewing in the back of her mind. She suckled eagerly, nuzzling Mommy's chest and letting loose little whimpers of pleasure in between swallows. "Good girl, Chamita. Gooood girl." Janet squirmed and curled her toes. Somewhere in the background, she heard Nanny chuckle. Then there was a shift on the couch, and she felt those strong hands rubbing her feet, thumbs digging firmly but gently into her arches. "Someone needs to relax and stop worrying so much," Nanny scolded. "It'll all be gone in a flash, and you'll be sad it's over before you know it." "And besides," Mommy added, "You know you deserve it." Yes, yes she did deserve it. She earned all of it. And it was nearly time to face it all. By the time Mama arrived, Janet was fully done up. Stark white tights covering what was now a thick, comfy white diaper with a couple of boosters, "So we don't have to worry about changes until it's all done" according to Mommy. Pink patent leather Mary Janes to match her pink-and-white babydoll dress with its puffy short sleeves and Peter Pan collar and satin sash tied into a huge bow in the back, a full crinoline skirt beneath. Nanny assured her that no one would see her well-padded bottom until she bent over, and when Janet stood in front of the mirror in Nanny's bedroom, her hair in curt pigtails with pink barretts securing them, far too much blush on her cheeks, and her pacifier attached with a pink ribbon to her collar, she actually believed it too. There were so many other things rustling on her, surely no one would hear her diaper, and the tights would keep it well secured even if she wet it. "So pretty!" Mama declared as Janet ran to give her a hug. "Are we all ready to go, then? Our car is waiting out front!" Car indeed! Mama had splurged on what looked like a cross between a limo and a giant SUV, which sat right out front of Nanny's condo. In the darkness of the fall evening, her three mommies surrounded her and ushered her into the back seat, where a wonderful sight awaited her – her very own car seat! She squealed as she climbed into it and Mama buckled her in snug with the five-point harness. "Is it ours? Do we get to keep it?" "Well yes we do, though I don't think it'll be of much use in Nanny's car." Mama said with a chuckle. "Oh, so now it's on me to swap out for a truck?" Nanny said. "Puleeeeeeeese Nanny?!" Laughter rose as the vehicle pulled out into traffic. Nanny rolled her eyes. "We'll discuss it more later. Mama needs to start consulting with Nanny before buying new furniture, though!" Janet kicked her legs happily, enjoying this new level of security and childishness she had fantasized about many times. Her three mommies chatted, but Janet was deep into little-space now, their words just a buzz in the background as she stared out the dark-tinted glass and watched the car-headlight fireflies dance to and fro. She suckled her pacifier happily, wishing she'd taken Avvy with her. Having a friend to cuddle would have made this moment absolutely perfect. Stop and go, stop and go, the car wandered through traffic, her mommies laughing and joking in the background somewhere, until it finally stopped one last time and didn't move again. "Time to go, Chamita!" Mommy reached over and released the latch on her harness. Janet's heart clenched. It was time. Right now, it was time. Time to step out, to be exposed in front of strangers on the street. Time to enter the strange place she'd only ever heard stories of, terrible stories. Her eyes darted around the car. Nanny had her handbag over her shoulder, and Janet could see the handle of the paddle that had on rare occasions made contact with her bare bottom. Janet didn't feel so safe anymore. She felt exposed, vulnerable, full of dread and anxiety. She began to tremble as the soother fell from her lips. "I... I can't.... Mommy, I can't!" Her throat began to tighten, and tears formed in the corners of her eyes. "I wanna go home Mommy! I can't go in there!" The faces of all three women changed, reflecting deep concern. Mommy snatched her up out of the carseat and onto her lap, pulling her close, while Nanny rubbed her leg and Mama her back. "It's okay, Chamita. It's okay. You can do this, I promise. Mommy would never make you do something she didn't think you could do." Other words of encouragement came from Nanny and Mama. Her pacifier was tucked back into her mouth, and Mommy rocked her gently. "Be brave, Jan-Jan," Nanny whispered. "You can do it." "Jan-Jan need a ride?" Mama offered. "No, I know Chamita's strong enough to walk with us, isn't she? Mommy and Nanny and Mama all be right by your side, baby, holding your hands the whole way. You can do it, baby. Look at me, Chamita." Janet looked up into Mommy's eyes. "Say it, Chamita. 'I can do it.'" "I... can do it." Janet didn't really believe it, not all the way. "That's right, you can do it." Mommy squeezed her tight again. "Say it again, Chamita. Mean it this time." Her mommies were all here to keep her safe and protect her and love her, just as they had the entire year since she agreed to become the full-time baby of this little poly family. How could she be afraid now? She trusted them completely. Surely they would not abandon her now. "I can do it." "That's my big brave Chamita! Let's go!" And with that, the car door opened, and out they went. This wasn't a particularly busy area of town for foot traffic, and even though she knew people in cars passing by could see her, those faces didn't mean anything, she couldn't see them. She clutched two hands tightly, and a third one rested on her shoulder as she took trembling steps toward the door. Mama opened it, and in she walked. A tall, dark-haired woman in a leather catsuit stood at a counter across the room, and as she saw Janet, she grinned broadly. "And who is this adorable little thing? I might have to check some ID!" She laughed, and Janet's mommies all laughed with her, though Janet just blushed. "Well this happens to be the belle of this particular ball. Lassetter party?" Mama spoke coolly and confidently as she reached forward to shake the woman's hand. "Right through that door," the woman replied. Got a good turnout for this one. Have fun cutie!" Right... through... the door. They were here, now. No turning back. Mommy gave her a pat on the bottom and whispered, "Go ahead, Chamita." Janet steeled herself. She stood up straight, took a breath, and marched toward the door, pushing it open and nearly stumbling on the staircase on the other side. Nanny caught her arm as she regained her balance and surveyed the scene. There was no evidence of any of the horrible things Janet had heard about. A huge sign greeted her overhead, "Happy First Birthday, Jan-Jan!" it declared. And suddenly the room noticed her as well. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" they all shouted, breaking into raucous applause. She spotted Tracy from the CAP crew, and her heart soared. One by one her little friends from so many play-parties and visits and overnights came into vision, and she squealed with joy. There were balloons everywhere, and a ball pit, and littles and their mommies and daddies filling the room. This dark place had been fully converted into a little princess' birthday ball. She turned back toward her now grinning mommies. "I... I was so scared! I... heard so much..." "Silly girl!" Mama said, pulling her into a hug. "This was the only place I could find that would host a birthday party for a big little girl like you!" "Oh, thank you, Mommy! Thank you Nanny! Thank you Mama! I love you!" She reached out to them all, and they surrounded her in a huge embrace. "Oh little Chamita, you know you deserved it." She did deserve it. She was a good girl, and she had the best mommies a little girl could ever dream of. Full of happy thoughts and love, she turned and dashed down the stairs and straight into the fray, just like a little girl at her very first little-girl party. The paddle? Oh yes, she did catch the paddle later that night. Right before she cut the cake, Nanny got one good shot on her very padded bottom. Her "birthday spanking". By the end of the night, Janet was positively giddy at the idea of having a second birthday party. But only if she deserved it...

Hello! I’m new to the website and thought I would post one of the role play stories I’ve been doing with someone who doesn’t want to be tagged, similar to far from home and some sophie And pudding stories. However I’m not quite sure if i did everything right, I can move this to a different section if it’s not right. Disclaimer: English is my first language but the person I’m doing this with is German. His second language is English his English is pretty close to perfect but there are some times things will be off, and I do not have the time to go back and edit all of them! So yay! Hopefully it doesn’t bug you too much and if you don’t like it well, don’t read it... we both love this story and we hope you do to. AND OH MY GOSH IM SORRY ABOUT TENSE CHANGES AGGHHHH I’m not that good at writing... please be nice. Without further ado here’s my first attempt at a story: Chapter One I was a little worried about Elaina being sick and at home alone, I decided I’d give her a call just to make sure she’s ok and didn’t need anything, “heyy Elaina how’s the cold, feeling any better, is there anything I can do for you?” "Hey Will" I cough and sneeze in the phone. "It won't kill me, I think. If you could bring me some peppermint tea and some more tissus that would be great." “Sure thing laina you’ll have to give me a couple minutes though” 5 minutes later I show up at the house with some blankets, tea and tissues. Walking in I find you lying on the couch resting your eyes, or sleeping. Quietly I whisper, “heyyyyy Elaina you up?” I open my eyes and skriek out loud. "Oh my god! You scared me to death. Please never ever sneak up on me like this again" “Ah! Sorry I didn’t want to wake you if you were asleep! Here’s the tea you wanted and the tissues. I thought you could use a blanket” I sat down in an armchair next to the couch, not sure how long I’d be staying. “Hey hey hey no you stay lying down, I’m going to make the tea and I’m gonna cook us some soup. You just stay comfy” I stand up and rub her back for a second before getting up to go to the kitchen "Thank you so much Will." I take the blanket and curl myself in. "I will make me some tea as soon as I find the strength to get up from the couch." I groan a bit "And I still have to cook something" Soon after, I return with the tea, with a lid and straw in it so it doesn’t spill, I walk back over to Elaina but instead of taking my arm chair seat I sit next to her head on the couch. tapping her shoulder, “alright you thirsty for some tea?” I guide the straw to her lips As I feel the straw I don't even bother to open my eyes and just accept the straw. I drink a bit and smile "Thanks for taking care of me, will" “Any time and every time Elaina. Just drink up for me” holding the cup with one hand I started rubbing her back with the other I drink the whole cup of tea and my tummy grumbles. "How long will the soup take? Iḿ really hungry." I lean against your hand. It´s quite strange to be cared for like this, but I kinda like it “Just a sec I’m heating it up Elaina, do you want more tea?” I hear your stomach growling and rest a hand on it “do you need to get to the bathroom?” I blush a deep shade of red. "No, I don't need to go, I'm just hungry." Actually, I needed to go but it would have been way to embarrassing.... “Alright if you’re sure, if you need to go just tell me and I can help you get there if you need it” I finished up the soup and brought it over to the table on the side of the couch, “can you sit up for me so we can get you some soup” I sit up, still cuddled in the blanket. "Thanks but I think I could go to the bathroom myself Oh, and the soup smells great, thanks for cooking." I say and grab the spoon. “Oh alright you must be good to feed yourself too then” I was going to grab the spoon but she seemed to have it handled, I went back to my seat at the armchair and kicked back pulling out a book, I figured I’d stay, I could always help if she needed me again I dig the spoon in the soup and guide it to my mouth. Just then I have to sneeze and the soup flys from the spoon threw the room. "God damn! I hate being ill!" I was never good at sitting still, was always full of energy and being forced to lie in bed all day was just horrible. And because that's not enough, I have to sneeze and get everything dirty “Oh! One second Elaina don’t move a muscle” I hurried to the kitchen and brought out a few napkins, I dabbed at elainas nose and shirt and the couch, I wiped her mouth clean too. “Here why don’t you let me do this, you just relax” I say taking the spoon and scooping up the first bite, “alright open up” I blush again. Being cared for like this reminds me of the times when I was ill as a little girl and my mommy and daddy taking care of me. "Uhm, thanks, I think." I say while opening my mouth and allowing you to feed me. I feed the first few spoonfuls normally before a quick tease “here comes the choo choo train” I say with a warm smile and a small laugh in my voice I eat the spoon full as well and smile back at you. "Thank you daddy." I tease you back. ˋIt´s nice to have such a good friend who cares for me and jokes with me´ I think and continue eating “Aww I think the baby’s just a little delusional” I teased right back. but inside my heart flutters when she calls me daddy, even though I know she’s only joking. Maybe some day she’ll actually call me that. But for now she was sick, so I just kept on finishing until the bowl of soup was empty Once the bowl was empty I cuddle myself into your arm. We did it many times before and it just felt so right at that moment. "I hope I will get better soon" I say and press my legs together. I waited a minute and just watched her be comfortable In my arm. But eventually i knew we’d have to move, so I scooped her up cradling her in my arms letting the blanket fall off her. “Alright if you’re gonna nap let’s do it in bed ok Elaina?” I began walking over to Where I knew her room to be from my previous visits to her house I cuddle in your arm while you carry me. "Wait, I need to pee before you bring me in my bed. Otherwise I will flood it" I joke and give you a kiss on the cheek. “Alright making a detour to the bathroom!” I announced in an announcer voice impression, I did a quick spin for fun and headed that way, “what’d you do that for baby?” I didn’t mind the kiss at all heck no, I just didn’t know why she did it, we weren’t a couple... "I don´t know, you take such a good care of me, I think a little kiss on the cheek to thank you for that won´t hurt." I hide my face at your chest. It was embarrassing and felt wrong now that I gave you that kiss. “Hey it’s ok sweetheart let’s get to the bathroom” I open the door and push it open with my foot, taking note of the bath and shower. Nooo definitely not I thought to myself. I resumed what I was doing and lifted the toilet lid skillfully with my foot setting her down on the seat "Thank you for bringing me here, I think I can manage the rest myself." I blush a deep red and images of you undressing me and sitting me on a childs potty flash in my mind. I knew that you are very protective, but today was a totally new experience for me. “Haha I know that silly, just shout out if you fall in” i joke one last time before walking just outside to wait for her, whistling a bit, the same image running through my mind of undressing Elaina. I brushed it off though when she mentioned it casually” I go to the toilet and wash my hands afterwards. I splash my face with some water and come back out of the bathroom. "I think I got a fever, Will. I´ll need to check my temperature." “No no no let me handle that, you, off to bed, March” I walked into the bathroom and checked the medicine cabinet finding a thermometer that would work for Elaina. I walked back on to her room thermometer ready. "it´s, you know, the kind of thermometer, well, for the bum." I stutter. "My mom always said that taking the temperature in the bottom is the most accurate way and I never changed to anything else." “Oh ok that’s a little different but it’s no problem, I don’t imagine you’re able to reach back there and use/read it well by yourself?” I ask walking up to her rolling you on your stomach flipping her skirt all the way up, but waiting to hear confirmation before continuing, looking around searching for eye contact Oh my god, he is going to take my temperature! I blush and hide my face in my pillow. I don´t respond to your question, but that I lay still with my bum up in the air so you can reach it better is an answer for itself. Somehow will found her need for help adorable, and removed her panties. “Alright try to relax Elaina, 3, 2, 1,” Will inserted the thermometer feeling her muscles clench up immediately but then slowly relax In my position you can see everything you shouldn´t and I bite in the pillow to relieve a bit of distress. I can´t prevent you from seeing my private parts, but I pray that you don´t recognize the little wet spot in my panties. Just to prove you wrong with your question I tried to hold my pee longer than I should have a while you carried me, a spurt of pee escaped into my panties. Will waited about a minute before it started beeping, he took it out and looked, “it looks like you do have a fever. 101 degrees!” Will let out a low whistle. “Alright let’s get you all fixed up then” will started pulling the panties back up but his pointer finger felt a little wet when he grabbed them. He looked at the lavender colored panties and saw a small spot of darker purple. He pulled the panties up the rest of the way and flipped elainas skirt back down, rolling her over, he announced “it looks like you almost didn’t make it! You gotta tell me Elaina when you have to go to the bathroom ok? Now let’s get you under covers and in bed” will pulled the covers up. Only now did he notice some of the things in her room, she actually had some stuffed animals, and she still held onto her baby blanket. It was one of the reasons he first took an interest in her actually, the fact that maybe she liked being little at heart. He’d figure that out later, but to start he decided to grab a stuffed animal and bring it to Elaina. I cuddle into my pillow. "I was fine the whole time, Will. My last accident is ages ago!" It was a lie, but a lie that you didn´t need to know. I hold it till the last second most of the time. Other things where just more important than going to the toilet. But the result of this was more than one accident in the past couple of month. I take the stuffy and blush again. "Could you hand me that blanket? I can´t sleep without it. Super embarrassing, I know." “Haha alright I don’t judge baby girl” will got up and brought the blanket back to Elaina, “does your blankie have a name, or your stuffie?” Will asked this in all seriousness knowing that lots of little girls with stuffed animals loved to talk about them, would Elaina be any different? "The blanket doesn´t have a name. But my stuffed animals all have names. The dog you gave me is called Laika. The bear over there is Mr. Cuddles. I cuddle him whenever I´m sad. Uhm, the giraffe in the corner is called Marta and the monkey on my wardrobe is called Charlie." I tell it to you with full enthusiasm. Not many people know about my stuffys and those who do normally don´t care to ask about them. “Well nice to meet you all Laika, cuddles, Marta, Charlie I’m sure you’re all very nice and will look after Elaina as she has her nap right?” I chuckle and kiss Elaina’s forehead, “there now we’re even, get some sleep I’ll be back to wake you in an hour or so” "Thanks will." I take my blanket and Laika and cuddle with them and soon drift of to sleep. Elaina looked so peaceful napping, he’d have to have her take them more often. For now he went back to his armchair and thought of what he should do the rest of the day for Elaina. Maybe a visit to the doctor’s was in order? No it was just a cold, only if things got worse. Tonight we’ll watch a movie I decided. ——————————————————————————— feed back is appreciated! Thanks for reading my story ? there’s definitely more to come (maybe, like i have more written buttt...)

I finished brushing my teeth with the new "sonic" toothbrush that Gloria bought me. I didn't see what was so fancy about it, but I wasn't going to object. The past few days had been amazing. I had been so afraid to tell her my secret.. I had carried it for almost twenty years. How do you tell the woman you just moved in with that you like to wear diapers? I didn't need them, I just liked them. And yet, here I was, standing in our bathroom in a lime green onesie and nothing else, a thick diaper barely hidden by the snap-crotch. Pink plastic peeked out on either side and the bulge was very clearly there. I was still in shock, honestly. I had finally given my tear-stained confession three weeks ago, we'd been dating for a little over two years and had moved in together about a month ago.. and then the packages started appearing. It was more than I could have dreamed. Every day was like Christmas. That night, Gloria had told me that she also had a confession, but it took some courage to work up to as well. She said she'd tell me soon. I swore to myself I'd be as accepting and loving about whatever she had to tell me as she had been for my dark secret.She had told me that she'd be home late tonight, but she expected me to be in the crib when she got home. One of the packages had been an inflatable crib, we blew it up and put it in the master bedroom, in the corner. It stood to my chest, I could crawl through the "bars" easily and climb over it, but there was something wonderful about it. Tonight was going to be my first night sleeping in it, I had no idea if it would actually be comfortable or not, but when I had laid down in it the first time and she stared down at me... I was in heaven. I crawled in through the bars and laid down, hugging my stuffed unicorn tightly. I grabbed the amazingly large paci she'd bought, it was red with a white ring - the package it came in said it was from Germany - and clipped the pacifier clip to my onesie and popped the nipple in my mouth. I laid down to watch a show on my phone, I was madly in love with Steven Universe - I'd seen this episode 3 times already, but it was wonderful. Garnet was so inspiring, how she was who she was regardless of what anyone thought.Just as the episode was finishing and I was singing along with the closing lyrics as best I could around the paci, I heard the front door open."Jackie sweetie, I hope you're in your crib!""I am! I'm a good girl!" I called back, letting the paci dangle on the clip. I climbed to my knees to stare over the crib bars at her, sinking into the inflatable mattress."You are a good girl, you're mommy's good girl," she cooed at me and set my heart aflutter. I knew she wasn't physically attracted to me this way, but this love was just as special. It was still a romantic love, I wouldn't want to share this particular feeling with anyone else on the planet, but it wasn't a sexual love. "Okay, I know I've been holding off on my part of the confession for a while, I wanted to make sure you felt loved and accepted before I spilled my dark secret, too. You need your paci right now," She paused to stroke my hair and pop my paci back in my mouth. I swear there was a glint of light as she tapped the shield, but it had to be my imagination. "There's nothing wrong with you, sweetie. There's nothing wrong with wanting to wear a diaper and sit in a crib, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be taken care of, to be made to feel small and protected. You know that, right?"I nodded, tears forming unbidden in the corners of my eyes. She was saying the words I had been wanting to hear since I was a child. I had always wanted to wear a diaper, I had no idea why. I had asked my mother when I was young, I was 5 or 6, and she had mocked me and told me everyone would make fun of me. She had made me wear one of my little sister's diapers and stood me in front of the mirror, making me wet it while I stared at myself... the whole while she told me that it was wrong for me to want to be a baby, wrong and shameful. I felt the fear and shame grip my heart as I was suddenly 5 years old again in my mind's eye, but Gloria's soft touch brought me back to reality."There's nothing wrong with you," she continued, "I like it when you're Little. You have this innocent sweetness about you that I never knew I wanted. You're so darling and fragile. Your emotions are so close to the surface, your sad, your happy.. and your emotions feel stronger this way. I love it. I love you. I'm happy you trust me enough to share this part of yourself. I'm happy to put you in a diaper and make you my little girl."She sat on the corner of the bed and stared at me, her dark brown eyes shining with love. She smoothed down a wrinkle in her hospital scrubs and pulled the tie out of her auburn hair, letting it fall past her shoulders. I loved it when she let her hair down, she was gorgeous. Gloria was a little heavy set, she had some insecurities around that, but I loved her anyway. We were about the same height but she had a few pounds on me, I was almost too thin, you could count my ribs when I stretched. She also had DD cups to my B cups. Hers wouldn't look good on me though.. and they were amazing on her. People were mean to her a lot about her size, especially her family, but I was always there to help pick up the pieces. It wasn't from a lack of trying on her part, we'd done the same diet together... she just couldn't seem to lose the weight. It actually caused a little bit of static between us, because I lost 15 pounds in a month trying her diet, while she struggled to lose 5. I felt badly for her, not because of how she looked - she was gorgeous to me - but because of how other people made her feel."There's a secret I have kept from you too," she said softly, "It's going to sound stupid, but I swear it's the truth. Everyone I've ever told has left me.. so I've been afraid to tell you. I love you a lot, Jackie." I reached for the paci to tell her I loved her too, but she put a finger to the shield, "Shh.. let me talk. You're too little to talk right now, just listen." The words sent a shiver down my spine. "I'm.. bruja," she said, looking down, "It skips generations in my family... it skipped my mother and grandmother, they thought it was gone forever.. but.. " Gloria looked like she was about to cry. I tried to spit out the paci to console her, but it wouldn't budge... trying to spit it out just led to me sucking on it. "It'll be good for us. I have to get this energy out somehow and this way, you get to experience a little something extra." She stroked my cheek, "You're too little to get out of your crib alone." She said with a smile, and I knew I saw some light on her fingertips this time. "I want to show you we can have fun with this, it's not all bad," she scooted back on our queen-sized bed, "Come to mommy." She held her arms out to me.I had no idea what she was talking about, I had no idea what bruja meant, but I knew I would love her no matter what. I stood up to climb over the inflatable railing of the crib.. but I couldn't. I couldn't lift my leg high enough. Gloria smiled at me."Come on, sweetie, come to mommy," her arms were so inviting, I tried to sit down and crawl through the bars, but I just couldn't. It was like something was stopping me from leaving the crib. I sat back on my diapered butt, confused. Gloria came back to the crib and leaned down, helping me up by my armpits. With her hands under my arms, I was able to swing a leg out of the crib and stand next to her. I tried to ask her how... but I still couldn't talk around the paci, nor could I spit it out. I was actually starting to get a little scared. She pulled me down on top of her on the bed and hugged me. "It's okay sweetie, be a big girl and use your words," she said as she pulled my paci from my lips."Gloria... what just happened?" I asked, my voice thick with fear."I told you sweetie, I'm bruja. A witch. I have the power to make people believe things that aren't true, make it real for them for just a little bit. Actually, I have to. If I don't, I get sick. We're going to find out if using it to make you happy has the same effect on me as... what I normally need to do with it. That's my secret. Do you still love me?""I... wha.. you're a witch? Like seriously? Hocus pocus and broomsticks and all that? That's not real, Gloria. Are you making fun of the secret I shared with you?" Why would she make light of this? I bared a piece of my soul to her. If she couldn't take it seriously... I don't know what I'd do. This wasn't a joke to me.But it didn't look like it was a joke to her either, her lips tightened with hurt and the smile faded from her eyes as she helped me back into the crib. I didn't resist, my emotions were in turmoil."No, Jackie, I'm not making fun of you. This is really hard for me to talk about," she frowned, "Let's assume I'm 100% telling the truth. Would you love me if I were a witch?" She was serious. Completely and totally serious. As I gazed into her gorgeous eyes, I could see the fear of rejection there. That feeling I knew all too well, I had shared my secret before and been mocked. Sharing it with Gloria had been terrifying and painful, but she loved me even though the desire I shared was... ridiculous. I promised myself that I would go into this with love and acceptance, just as she had.. and I was failing."Of course I would still love you." I looked her straight in the eyes and professed my love with all the sincerity I had in my body. I would never do anything to hurt this woman, the first person who ever really saw me for me. A tiny flame of fear kindled in my heart that I was causing her the very pain I was terrified of myself."Do you need to go to the potty?" she asked me, not breaking the eye contact. "A little bit," I confessed. This was a little frustrating, we were having a serious conversation - this wasn't the time to play our Little game. I needed her to know that I was there for her, I didn't want her to hide behind my Little feelings. I wanted her to know that she was loved in equal measure, "but this is serious, Gloria. I don't want to hurt your feelings. I love you deeply, and if you're serious about this, I want you to know that I'm there for you.""Shh," she stroked my cheek and the light was on her fingers again, "You're too little for the potty, use your diaper." I felt a tingle where she touched me, that traced its way down my body... into my diaper."What?" I asked.. and felt that my diaper was growing warm. I put my hand between my legs and felt the padding swelling up under the onesie, "Did I just?""You're too little to stand by yourself," she booped me on the nose and my legs collapsed. I stared up at her from the inflatable mattress of the crib. The glow was still fading from her fingertip.. there was a faint red hue to the light. I tried to stand up but my legs wouldn't listen. I started to panic. I couldn't stand!"Gloria, what's going on? Why can't I stand up?" I couldn't keep the panic from showing in my voice, but she looked completely calm.. the fear was fading from her face, she was Gloria again."Because you're so little, silly. You're just my tiny, little, baby girl. Isn't that what you always wanted? You like being Little.""I do like being Little... are you saying you can take away my bladder control? My ability to walk? You can make me your baby?" I couldn't believe the words that were spilling from my lips, but I could feel that nervous joy growing in my stomach. Butterflies. It was impossible... but I wanted it so badly."Yes, sweetie. How does that make you feel?" She was probing, her tiny core was vulnerable, she was serious about what she was sharing. This... was real. The possibilites were incredibly exciting and terrifying at the same time. But in her question, there was fear. If I responded with fear as well, it would break her."Can.. can I stop you?" I couldn't keep the tremor from my voice entirely, nor could I keep the blush from my cheeks. I didn't honestly know how I wanted her to respond."Do you want to?" There was a touch of sadness in her voice, that fear of rejection. She was placing her secret heart in my hands and hoping against hope that I didn't crush it.I sat on my squishy bottom and thought about the implications of her supposed power. My diaper was warm and comfy and I didn't have to struggle to wet it. It was electric, my heart was pounding in my chest. I had wet a diaper for the first time just two days ago.. it was so hard! I had to imagine I was sitting on the toilet for minutes before I could finally go. Gloria had teased me about it as she changed me. Having her touch me and then just wetting... even if it wasn't magic, it was magical. It was hard to believe.. but it was hard to deny too."No," I grinned, "But.. if I wanted to, could I? Or can you use it as a punishment?""Ohhh, someone wants to be bratty, huh?" A smile spread across her face as well, with a glint of playfulness in her eye. She saw me. Of course she saw me, Gloria knew me better than any other person on the planet. She loved me, despite all my imperfections. She saw me for who I was, in a way that no one ever had before. And she accepted me."Maybe... may I please?" My heart surged in my chest. For some reason, I wanted her to make me Little. I didn't understand the desire, but it felt amazing."Let's see, you already can't get out of your crib, you can't stand up or walk, and you have no bladder control... what else do you want to lose?""Can you take my words?" My pulse was racing, this was too good to be true. If I was dreaming, I didn't want to wake up."If your tantrums get out of control, yes I can. I can render you completely mute or I can leave you with just a few words. Is someone feeling fussy?", Gloria reached forward and pinched my cheek playfully, "I'm going to make a big bottle for you to drink and you're going to drink the whole thing without fuss, right?""No!" I shouted, though I couldn't keep the grin from my face, "I'm not thirsty! I don't want a bottle!" I laid down on the mattress and kicked my feet, flailing my arms, "No no no no no!""Sweet girl," Gloria smiled, "Someone is too little to speak, no words from you." She tapped my forehead with a glowing finger.. and my words were gone."Waaah!" I yelled, finishing my tantrum with a grin. "Yaa!" I giggled and clapped my hands. I had never felt this little before. I was trapped in a crib, in a wet diaper, and I couldn't say a word until my lady love allowed it. I laid down and sucked on my paci and hugged my unicorn while I waited for my bottle. She came back with it and I sat up, reaching for the bottle and opening and closing my hands."Does someone want their bottle now? Is my little princess going to be a good girl?""Aaa," I let the paci drop from my lips and nodded."Drink it all gone, or I'll make you," Gloria smiled. "I expect that diaper to be nice and wet for me. Show me how little you are, princess."The feelings were amazing as I lay back and drained the bottle. Peach water, she had added a sweetener to the cold, cold water. It was delicious. This was my fantasy come true. I didn't have to ask for it, I didn't have to pretend. I really was Gloria's Little this way. I had no choice. There was no shame in something I had no control over. I was completely trapped... and free to enjoy it.And that made it all the sweeter.

It had been a while....since I had stopped with my secret. One of my friends found out and made jokes, so I lied and said I no longer do it. I had gotten rid of everything and now....I wanted all back. I wanted diapers, a baby dress, the accessories, and other things. What would I do? Maybe I will order a few things and hope for the best. Lets just hope my friend doesn't find out, because shell make a field day of it. Like last time. She wanted me to do the fetish in front of people, her, and such. But I wouldn't. So I rid of everything. Cause she is forceful when she wants to do something.....

Hi my name is Bubbles and i came here to meet new friends and just get more involved for the community Some of you may know me from my work with Abdreams.com, my name is bubbles there too. I love abdl even though i just got into it about a year ago when i turned eighteen. Apple showed me the way and i'm so very happy she did. I would love to talk and get to know people. Xoxo, Bubbles