GirlyGirl

I don't have much I enjoy doing right now. I did enjoy gaming, but he has our gaming system so that's out of the question. Maybe I just gotta find everything new. Or maybe nothing will change. I struggle with depression as while and its just been a bumpy road since then.

So I was dating this guy for about a year. After a couple months he told me about him being a DL. I found this site and it really helped me understand everything and I was able to feel comfortable about what he was into. I told him I would give it a try just to see how he felt using it. The first time I ever wore it took me hours to use it, but he wouldn't let me out of it until I did... Which kinda excited me to be honest. Flash forward a couple months and I've worn a couple times and we even bought me some pink ones that I loved! I was starting to feel really open with him about all of this and opened up to him saying how I enjoyed wearing. Flash forward some more and we broke up. We broke up because I couldn't give him what he wanted even though I was giving him everything I had, but it wasn't enough. All in all he wanted someone he never had to talk to unless he wanted to hook up and I couldn't do that. not to myself. I deserve better. I didn't realize that once I lost him though I would lose this too... I know technically I can do this stuff on my own. But I haven't accepted that part of me yet. I was helping him open up about it and he was helping me realize that liking something different is okay. I can't even think about doing that stuff again without breaking down while thinking of him. So how can I do something I want to do but hurts me at the same time? I just miss him, and I hate it. I want to feel the comfort of wearing again but it just hurts at the same time.