BrownBobby

Yep - they tried dilating to stretch the stricture, and that helped, but they now think it's best to cut it out. It's a temporary move - scar tissue will eventually reform - but with proper care, it will take a long, long time before it becomes a problem again. The stricture can be painful at times, especially when it's acting up, but it's bearable. (And yes, I've still been diaper dependent the entire time - scar tissue cannot hold back a half-full bladder when you stand up unless it's REALLY inflamed.) As for what I told doctors...it was the truth. Honestly, I don't know why people think it's going to trigger some huge, negative consequences. Doctors are often confused when I mention it, but I've done it enough where they at least understand why I would have done something like this. I'm even honest about being honest - "I could either make up a medical history that has this presentation, or I could just be honest about what happened and why. I'd rather be honest."

And if you're willing to pay the price - think tens of thousands of dollars. Still worth it in my mind, but it definitely was a steep price tag.

It's odd with a urethral stricture. Imagine going to all that work to remove the urinary sphincters, only to develop one that you can't really control if you wanted to. It's been an interesting experience so far - but I've found local urologists willing to treat it. When it's not affecting things, I'm basically a pre-potty trained toddler in terms of control. I can either go every 10 minutes, or accept that I'm going to wet myself. I find it a perfect amount of control to have - just enough to know I'm *still* failing. I'm even getting surgery next week for it, so here's hoping in two weeks I'll be mostly done with it except for some occasional cathing to make sure the stricture remains stretched out for good. They did remove the catheter in a clinical setting. They didn't need to, honestly - it went exceptionally smoothly. I didn't even know it was out at first because of how quick it went.

There's an irony here - I've been doing mostly fine. You're definitely right that the (honestly hilariously ignorant and predictably inane) nay-saying has a negative effect on things, but ironically, my absence has been because of personal things in my life - turns out, being made incontinent doesn't magically fix the rest of your life. Who knew? I'm pretty darn excited to see someone else pursue this - if anyone has any specific questions, please feel free to ask. And here's hoping your surgery goes well - you're in good hands. Say hay to Yuni to me - she's amazing!

I and the original thread author went through the same place - and have been encouraged to share whatever we want about the process. This is an actual, legitimate offer - hence the matching price tag.

Two people now, actually - I'm one of them. And for those people looking into serious interventions like this...surgery is a very serious step, but with all its risks, it's a safer solution than options like this.

I agree with @DAQ - unless you're implanting electrodes or attaching them directly to nerves, you probably won't be able to get them to affect the bladder this way. The muscles are just too deep under the skin to have that strong of an effect. Now - if you're willing to accept a significant level of risk, there is an alternative way. When muscles get overworked, they stop being able to contract, and default to relaxed. For the pelvic floor, this would severely limit someone's ability to hold their urine. I experimented with some possibilities and had some promising results before finding much less fun side effects and stopping. Now, if you're looking to make someone mess themselves...that's easier with TENS. 😛

I have quite a bit of relevant experience here - and it's going to be difficult to get a doctor to do this. Not for the reasons a lot of people would say ("Do no harm!", "Be careful what you wish for!", "You'll get your organs harvested!", and other very unhelpful and unenlightened takes), though. When I approached multiple urologists to talk about this, none would do it. The risk of side effects in recent medical literature make it a solution that most won't do unless your life expectancy is less than the usual time side effects start presenting. All of them were much more willing to perform surgery than consider this course of action. If you are looking for surgical options, I've found a urologist that will do it, and he's had two successful procedures at this point. It's expensive - think $20,000-$30,000 - but if you really want to do it, it's an option that's available. If you still are interested in stents, I'd recommend looking at the threads in this forum that go into detail about self-made ones based on catheters. They come with their own risks, but the temporary nature of them help with a lot of the more serious side effects that might result.

It's interesting to read this - not only because what's described is very much in line with the ideas and tenets of cognitive behavioral therapy, but because I have told many psychologists and therapists about this and received nothing but support and understanding. If you have had a negative experience with sharing this with professionals who should have been supportive but weren't...I'm very sorry to hear that, and know that it probably was very unpleasant and uncomfortable. I hope it helps somewhat to know that that isn't the only possible outcome from telling the medical community about things like this.

For me, the line is a bit more blurry than this, but it's somewhere between 4 and 5. I feel most satisfied when I experience an inconvenience or situation where being continent would have been preferable, or even desirable. Did I just pee on the floor mid diaper change? Wake up to wet sheets? Leak all over my chair because work kept me in back-to-back video meetings? Those moments really help it set in that I am incontinent, and not just pretending. It's not for everyone for sure, but it's deeply and unbelievably fulfilling for me.

And to add to that procedure...there's a one in three chance it simply does...nothing. Trying to weaken those muscles is a difficult process, even with surgery. I'm not telling you not to pursue this - heck, I'd be a hypocrite if I did. But you definitely need to know what you're getting into, and the consequences of it. I don't regret getting surgery myself to do this - heck, it's something I'm happy I did. But that was after ten years of wearing 24/7, talking with several therapists and medical professionals about whether I should do this and how would be best, trying twice with different procedures, and even then I'm not at the fantasy-in-the-stories 100 percent complete incontinence. There's no shortcut to this process. I'm happy to help and answer questions - I'd much rather people be educated than take careless risks with stuff like this. But think "major surgery with the appropriate price tag and risks" when you're considering it. I recovered excellently, and it was still a overnight stay in the hospital and a week of nothing more strenuous than walking a few hundred feet.

So...yes, there is a surgery. I've had it done by licensed, skilled surgeons under medical supervision. But there are two important facts to consider: - The cost is tens of thousands of dollars. The fact that it's an unusual procedure means those that do it charge the market rate for the liability they're taking on. - This is a surgery, with serious side effects. Even after mine, I'm dealing with after effects that require additional medical help (and potentially surgery). I'd highly recommend pursuing any other options you have first before looking down this path. It's expensive, risky, and completely irreversible without more surgery.

@FreeFlowin - I've actually received three letters of support from different therapists over the years. I admit I was surprised I was able to do so, but each was obtained with months (if not years) of regular appointments with each licensed counselor/therapist I worked with. As it turns out, having a lifelong desire to be urinary incontinent and diaper dependent has a lot of knock-on effects on my mental health in general. I spent most of my life wondering whether or not I should dive into this desire and explore it further, and at least for me, every step I've taken closer to this goal has been very, very good for my mental health. While the letters have been my suggestion, each therapist was very willing to write one after establishing a relationship and exploring my desires. It took a little work to find more open-minded practitioners, but it was something I could usually figure out in the first meeting by asking how comfortable they might be with more unusual yet legal desires I had. Heck, when my previous long-time counselor was retiring, I asked him to write a summary letter of my desires for the next therapist to have a running start in helping me. As a bonus, that letter included explicit language saying that, in his professional opinion, hypnosis was one of the safe options he supported me exploring over several other more dangerous options I would rather avoid. Now, that's not to say it was easy to be honest with a professional about my desires. I wanted to melt into a puddle the first time I admitted desiring to be incontinent, especially describing the feelings that came with wearing diapers. But it does get easier after the first time, and I've had positive responses more often than negative ones from the experience. Hearing about your desires...it sounds like you would benefit from something that lets you test the waters before deciding one way or the other more firmly. You can always work on conditional incontinence (like diapers being a trigger to wet yourself freely) or self-acceptance of your desires, and see if you like the experience enough to more seriously pursue full-time incontinence, you can start the search for someone to start the process with.

My best advice here is to look for therapists likely to be open to those discussions. From my experiences, a professional willing to discuss issues like LGBT+ or writing letters for other procedures is more likely to support this one as well. It might take a session or two for them to understand why you're seeking what you are, but it's much easier to find someone likely to be open-minded and work with them than try to locate a very specifically ABDL-aware professional. Alternatively, it's perfectly acceptable to ask your current therapist if they have any recommendations - you enjoy their help, but you have an issue you want to work on separately of your existing relationship, and you respect their professional recommendations. Good luck!

I've barely had a moment to myself for a while now, and apologize for the delay - but I'm very happy to talk more about things went with Jayson and https://alittlehypnosis.com/. The summary is "the experience was better than I ever could have hoped for, but not what I expected going into it, and I'm very happy with where I am." About a year ago, I found Jayson through a forum post on another website, mentioning his abilities and interests. I've tried working with several other hypnotists in the past, with mixed results. I could find someone with experience with AB/DL clients, and I could find someone interested in focusing on the non-erotic/non-fetish parts of my desires and wishes, but I couldn't find one that had both. I reached out tentatively, expecting to have a session or two, get some interesting yet temporary results I had in the past, and move on to whoever I could find next. I was utterly shocked when I found someone who not only seemed interested in what I wanted to work towards, but could understand the reasons why I might want it. As I said in a previous post, my goal was urinary incontinence, diapered or not. It's been a desire I've had for literally as long as I can remember, and every time I've moved closer to fulfilling the desire, it's been positive for my mental health. I asked him if he would be willing to work with me on that goal -- wetting myself without control, wherever, whenever -- and he said yes, with the caveat I get approval from a medical or mental health professional before we work on it. Since this desire for incontinence has been a very strong part of me for so long, I've talked with multiple professionals about it. I even had a letter of support from a therapist ready because I had anticipated it could be useful for a situation just like this. I shared it with Jayson, we talked about what I saw as desirable in being incontinent, and began with setting the foundation. The first few sessions focused on getting me used to entering trance regularly and deeply, followed by working through my subconscious's ideas around being permanently incontinent. And after a few sessions, I was entering trance more easily in general, not just for him. Even if your goal is "I want to be more susceptible and comfortable in trance," he'd be excellent to work with. Progress at first was slow, but it was happening. I found it harder and harder to consciously know when I had to pee, and would find myself occasionally wetting without being sure if I had decided to start it. This wasn't completely unusual - I've had hypnotists get results like this before, but they've faded over the next day or so. But this time...they faded much more slowly. It took weekly reinforcement to keep progress positive at first, but progress was being made. And in some intangible way I can't describe, I felt more incontinent - like I was less in control. And it was amazing. But, by far, the most interesting and effective part of working with Jayson was a few months in. After an especially effective hypnosis session, I found myself almost messing myself without being able to stop it. I was surprised at first. I'm not opposed to messing my diaper, but we were focusing exclusively on cultivating bladder incontinence. This led to a lot of self-reflection. Why did this happen? How could it have happened? It took a little more work and self-reflection, but an unexpected truth came to the surface: my subconscious desires for incontinence didn't match my consciously stated ones. My subconscious saw me being incontinent as using diapers for everything, not just wetting. I reflected long and hard on that realization...but it was accurate. Truthfully, I wanted to no longer use a toilet for anything - and I've always wanted to. I've just thought it impractical, or unable to be done. And I took that thought of "I don't think this is possible to do" and made it "I don't really want this after all." Jayson understood this, and we even realized that my conscious and subconscious mind could both have what they wanted, as long as I was comfortable with embracing my diapers even more. For the last few months, the goal has been to still induce full urinary incontinence, but to also instill unconscious control of messing myself. I don't control when I mess or need to mess, but my unconscious mind's happy to choose more convenient times for it than not. Case in point, if I'm about to change my diaper or take a shower, there's a decent chance I'll find myself messing my diapers as I go to the changing room. In addition, we found that the word "inevitable" was a very powerful descriptor of what I wanted. It didn't matter if I tried to hold it, or be continent, or circumvent things. In the end, it was inevitable I'd be using my diapers - any resistance was temporary and couldn't hold out forever. And just to make sure it was as easy and natural as possible to stay in diapers, we muddied my memories of using anything but my diapers - I know at one point I used toilets, but I sure as heck can't remember it, and see myself wearing and using diapers when I think back on my entire life now. All of this was consensual, in collaboration, and at my request, and I couldn't be happier with it. Am I at complete, total, always-out-of-control incontinence after a year of work? No, I'm not. But I'm closer than I've EVER been to it, and very happy with the results. When I need to wet, I usually notice because I'm starting to wet my diaper, or feel a full bladder and know I'm going to wet as soon as I try to stand up or move. When I need to mess, even if I don't really want to deal with the aftermath, I can't quite convince myself to take my diaper off and do something else. And when I look at the toilet that's in my bathroom, I can't see myself using it - others, maybe, but definitely not me. I'm incontinent and diaper dependent now - why wouldn't I be using my diapers? Jayson's been amazingly effective in working with me, so much more than anyone else I've ever tried working with. They were all skilled, yes, but they didn't understand the "why" of why I wanted this, or knew how to help me clarify and crystallize what exactly I wanted. His willingness to work thorough my desires with me, combined with his very effective hypnosis techniques and experience, set him far above any other person I've worked with. He's even helped with a few other side goals along the way -- feeling proud and even attractive while in a diaper, for instance -- with great results. As a pants-wetting, seat-filling, bed-soaking diaper boy, I can't recommend him highly enough. His pre-recorded files give you a good idea of what you're in for if you have a session with him. If you find them appealing, absolutely give a live session with him a try. I'm happy to answer more specific questions if anyone has them (and will get to my DM's here soon). I'm just beyond happy there's someone out there now who sees these desires as more than a fetish or erotic desire - it's been deeply fulfilling for me to work with him on this in a way I didn't think was possible. I'm glad our community has a professional who's willing to work on this just like you would anything else with hypnosis.

I'm one of Jayson's clients working with him for incontinence, diapered or not. I've worked with a few hypnotists on this goal, and made staggered amounts of progress. After working with Jayson, I'm as close to my ideal version of diaper dependence and incontinence as I've ever been. I had the support of a therapist before contacting him, so a letter from them was sufficient to meet the "medical letter of recommendation" requirement. It hasn't been a fast process - as it turns out, undoing a lifetime of training and the feelings/emotions attached to it is hard! - but he's achieved things I thought I'd never see. If you're on the fence, set up a consultation. He's very understanding of ABDL desires and requests. (And if anyone wants more details on how training with him went, I'm willing to give them - but I don't want to hijack a thread based on all of our options for hypnosis.) On that note...I'd add the following hypnotists' recordings available at www.warpmymind.com to a "recommended" list (that is definitely not exhaustive - there's a lot of great work on the site if you're willing to search), all for various reasons: MindMaster: He's the OG for a reason. If he works for you, he works REALLY well. Ties regression/seeing yourself as a baby as part of incontinence. Recommended Files: Bladder Retraining, Baby Acceptance, Baby Behaviors, Poopy Pampers Sarnoga: Excellent inductions and conversational style. Often skews masculine/male, but many files are for any audience. Recommend Files: Diaper Dependence 1-4, Accustomed to Wetting, Every Good Boy Wears Diapers (masculine focus)/ Happiness is a Warm Diaper (feminine focus) SweetDreamsHypno: Similar to MindMaster, but an even more heavy focus on regression alongside incontinence. Recommend Files: Hypnotic Mist 1-4, Complete Wet Submissive Baby, Diaper Wetting Baby Forever MajorPixel / TheVoice666: Not for the faint of heart, and very much skewing masculine/male, but if you're more DL and enjoy humiliation, these files are excellent. Recommend Files: A Need for Diapers, Relearn Bowel Control, Relax Under Pressure series Wohermiston: I've never seen someone put so much effort into finding so many possible approaches and wordings. Worth seeing if one resonates with you. Recommend Files: My Bladder Control Lesson, You Love Diapers, Hot Water Bottle Game #2, Baby Bladder Therapy ChampTehOtter: Excellently voiced and written, clearly by an ABDL for ABDLs. Often includes regressive themes. Recommend Files: Forget You Wet, Incontinent Pants Pooper, Diaper Train 1-5

From the sounds of your view of that "last thread" you mention...I'm not sure you fully understand exactly the gravity of the situation that happened there. I'm all for "live and let live" for a lot of things, including the vast majority of the threads in this forum, naysayers included. But that thread...it showed a very real, ugly undercurrent that needs to be addressed. Bad actors don't care if you're nice, or inviting, or welcoming. They come into this space with their agenda already in mind, and plan on executing it. There are not many of them, I grant you, but to claim that they should just be minimized or ignored is...idealistic, at best. The point of rules like this isn't to be a general purpose statement of intention, or to provide a quick explanation of what's expected. It's to give a simple, easy to understand list of actions that we don't want to see here. If everyone IS following the ideals you mention, then following those rules should be trivially easy. The very fact that I still expect others to break them (heck, some have even in the past week) shows they're necessary. And one last thing, since I think it's the crux of why I disagree with such...optimistic...language around our rules. I can block or ignore users all day long. My block list is short, but it has been effective. But if the people I now have to block, ignore, or educate are mods and admins...there's a problem no statement of positive intent will solve on its own.

This...is a hard line to draw. The conversation about surgery was actually one that could have forestalled a LOT of potential self-harm. If you have a safe alternative that's supervised by medical personnel, it means you DON'T have to rely on a lot of other options that are riskier, less refined, and unverified. But for some reason, just the notion that the surgery itself was on the table triggered the seemingly knee-jerk response of "That's harm, and should be stopped at any cost!" The result of that, of course, is that every other even worse option becomes more appealing. The rule as it is proposed is much closer to how I'd write it. Theoretical discussions about how to make a more safe option for individuals who will pursue any option seems like exactly the type of discussion we'd want to support, not suppress. Discussions of incredibly risky self-performed medical procedures or blatantly illegal actions? Yeah, probably best those don't have an open forum.

From previous discussions, I'm pretty sure it's been made abundantly clear that there are some members in that community who will be offended by the very continued existence of this sub-forum, much less anything in it. I think the goal of "not offending a reasonable reader" vs "not offending all members" is the standard to strive for here.

I don't agree with the context expressing this idea and the tone used...but it's still an excellent idea. It may make sense logically to group the topic of incontinence together, but keeping these two groups together is creating unnecessary friction that can be solved by simply moving one of them. It only makes sense to move the smaller. I have some mild concerns over how the sub forum will fare with the visibility of the main "lifestyle" group...but it's not enough to disagree with moving the sub-forum into it.

This. This is the core of why I feel so strongly about topics like this. The knee-jerk reactions of "Do no harm!" and ignorant replies of "You're crazy/deluded/fucked up!" and trite warnings of "Be careful what you wish for!" simply do not help. For those of us who live with these desires...we know. We know how unusual this is, and how much it affects us. But what choices are there to sate that desire? I'll share this much about my background. There's a dozen risky, dangerous ways to go about this goal of urinary Incontinence. All of them I can make happen right this second, since I have the cash and connections. **I do not want to,** but if no other options are there...what's left? Every professional I've talked with has supported this desire, seeing fulfilling it or moving towards it as the better option over suppressing or denying it. Most of them are frustrated themselves over the lack of remedies I can use to work towards it. (And if that idea makes you want to call over a dozen medical and mental health professionals quacks or fraud, I'd really, REALLY question that impulse. Do you REALLY think you have a "common sense, obvious, normal" truth that they didn't?) People who have this desire strongly - not as a kink or a passing urge, but as something that burns in them day in and day out despite any efforts to sate, treat, or reduce it...they want a safe way to accommodate it. And, honestly, it's kind of disappointing to see the response to even having a discussion around that potential safe path is...this, in a forum allegedly supporting of it. I appreciate @Elfy's statement of support and reminder to follow standard reporting rules, but until some bigger sign is given, by words or actions of the moderation team, I'm going to assume there really is no safe place, and act accordingly. It's unfortunate...but I'd rather not have yet another place where I'm called crazy for something I can't control any more than my age, height, or sexual orientation.

Thank you for the statement of support - I appreciate it, and it's good to know that there are admins who agree with keeping this place as a forum for these topics. However, I would also like your guidance in what to do when someone isn't following this guidance and insists on posting in this sub-forum against the rules. For a random member who acts either repeatedly or especially maliciously, should we report those comments and let the admins address it? And, as a question I never thought I'd have to ask but need to in light of recent events...if that person is a moderator or admin themselves, what is the proper way of bringing that issue to attention?

Unfortunately, @oznl I have been around here for a while - long enough to remember why there's a sticky in this sub-forum with rules specific to it. The solution then was to appoint a specific mod who could keep the sub-forum from becoming...well, this comment thread. This sub-forum has always been a place where individuals would purposely not follow the rules out of some sense of "preaching truth to the lost" or "saying the hard things nobody wants to hear" or any of a number of "concerned" stances. I can deal with those - they're everywhere. What worries me far more is when the leadership of a space shows those same behaviors. One admin decided it was perfectly acceptable for them to violate the stickied Site Rules multiple times, much less any general forum rules. A group of others saw someone violating the same stickied Site Rules and someone else frustrated at that violation, and decided the problem was the frustrated person, not the initial rule-breaker. The conclusion I draw from this seems logical to me. This is where I hope @DailyDi is able to act to improve things. You're exactly right that this is a good space, and one I don't want to lose. The behavior here was a dark reflection of what this space could become, given current circumstances. I really, really don't want that dark future to come true...but I, personally, am powerless to keep it from happening. I don't expect to know the details of what those decisions are, or what discussions happen behind the scenes. But I do expect some acknowledgement that what happened here was not okay, and that it will be addressed by leadership in some way. Otherwise...I'm going to act on the assumption it could just as easily happen again.

This is why I'm not sharing my story. @oznl, normally I'd agree with you - the solution to poor ideas expressed maliciously or ignorantly is more words, not less. But it's pretty clear the mod team has decided where they stand on this, and this entire sub-forum in general. If @DailyDi wishes to clarify how exactly the pinned rules thread will be enforced on anyone in this sub-forum, moderator or no, I'd share my story. But I'd rather not make myself the target of admins on this forum - an unfortunate position, but one that seems most prudent at the moment.

Funnily enough, there's a lot of discussion going on in the medical community exactly around whether or not it'd be better to make someone's body match what their brain's image of their body is, and it's specifically around things like blindness and amputation. The most convincing argument is that the discussion lines up pretty well with how professional consensus slowly changed around gender reassignment - there was a time not so long ago that we "wouldn't do that" to someone even though they wanted to. Obviously, you want to make sure there isn't an underlying condition or trauma that's fueling that desire that should be addressed...but if the desire remains, and the person fully understands exactly what they're asking for, what the consequences of that decision is, and is of sound mind to make that evaluation...why stop them?