YourFNF Posted May 30, 2021 Share Posted May 30, 2021 I'm not sure how I feel about the twins relationship... It doesn't exactly seem healthy.... Lani was putting off her transition because of her brother... That's going to cause issues... Link to comment
diaperpt Posted May 31, 2021 Share Posted May 31, 2021 10 hours ago, YourFNF said: I'm not sure how I feel about the twins relationship... It doesn't exactly seem healthy.... Lani was putting off her transition because of her brother... That's going to cause issues... I kind of agree, but already it's causing issues. The twins relationship doesn't seem healthy right from the start. Lanny seems to be sincere in declaring herself a girl, but wanting her brother to share is causing Hayden a lot of confusion and frustration. He wants to please but doesn't want even to pretend to be a girl and yet feels the need to do a good enough job at pretending. Oh, and while I get why the mixed pronouns are there - even for Lanny - it's driving me crazy! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 1, 2021 Author Share Posted June 1, 2021 On 5/30/2021 at 4:07 PM, YourFNF said: It doesn't exactly seem healthy.... It super ISN'T HEALTHY! On 5/30/2021 at 9:58 PM, diaperpt said: Oh, and while I get why the mixed pronouns are there - even for Lanny - it's driving me crazy! Omg I feel you. Writing it was exhausting. o_o Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 2, 2021 Author Share Posted June 2, 2021 10.) It was another hour until we got to the mall, and after that, another three before we'd left. We had too many shoes. I tried to argue our funds, but Lanny knew they weren't short. Still, it seemed so unnecessary. "If you get shoes, I'm getting a new book." I'd already finished the one Alex bought me. "Hoping to meet your gentleman caller again?" I teased and Hayden poked out her tongue - it was a very girlish thing and it made me smile because she'd been so flat today. "Don't go making any dates tonight; I have some plans with you." Marie looked at me questioningly and I managed a geeky little smile back in return. She had no idea... I liked my sister, I really did. I liked Marie too. They were, for all intents and purposes, my two favorite people on the planet. But damn did I need a break sometimes. They talked about wanting to visit some hair bow store or something and I knew that gave me enough time to relax. I had my phone on, anyway. So I sat in the far end of one of the aisles, a book in my lap. I practiced reading out loud, under my breath, to try to bring my voice to the perfection Lanny's already was. "A new book already?" The boy twisted his head to the side to read the title of the downward facing cover and then smiled approvingly. He was dressed differently today - a dress shirt with pants that shouldn't have worked, and a little hat that didn't make sense in context of any universe. He looked good, though. That was something Alex excelled at. "I'm not stalking you, just so you know. You're sitting in the back of my bookstore, so you’ll have to believe in coincidence." I looked up at the boy, rather surprised by his reappearance. I wondered what time it was and how the timetables paired up with yesterday, but all in all, I wasn't taken off guard quite so badly. "I finished your book before we came out. I liked it." "Do you always read out loud under your breath? It reminds me of Emma Watson - she used to mouth everybody else's lines while they said them. You can see it in the first movie. But you remind me of her." "The girl in Harry Potter...?" I turned the page of the book and ran my finger along the lines to help me read. I hadn't noticed, not until he'd mentioned it, but the reading under my breath did seem to help my voice around him, and maybe that was for the best. "I didn't get a chance. I was dragged here. It's not really my ideal place to be, you know... but the bookstore helps." "Bookstores are like that - embassies to your bedroom in foreign lands." Alex had a particular way with words that was so close to being pretentious that sometimes the line blurred and it was hard to tell. "Who dragged you here? Family? Mom and Dad fawning over impossible room displays at the Ikea next door, while their daughter finds refuge in the bookstore and talks to strange boys?" My finger stopped on the page and I let it slide out of place. Silence filled the space between Alex and me for a few seconds before I shook my head and closed the book. I put it back on the shelf. I was really liking it, too. "My sister." It was strange to say. "And my friend." "Ah, you and your sister like different things?" Alex didn't sit or anything - he liked to stand, rocking gently back and forth on a pair of pink converse that he probably shouldn't have been wearing but pulled-off. He adjusted his glasses and smirked at the girl. "Need another book recommendation?" "Um... yeah, actually." If anything, Alex could at least serve as a pretty good guide to the library. Usually when someone recommended a book to me, I'd finish it within the week, and it left me with a strange lacking of extras to pick up. Alex handed me a hard cover and I leafed through the first few pages. "I read this when I was about your age and I think you'll get a kick out of the protagonists thought-self." He smiled coyly and then much more cutely when the girl actually looked up and met his gaze. "I think you're younger than me," I said flatly. It wasn't that I meant it to be rude or anything, but the subtleties of conversation were curiously lost on me. For everyone, that is, except my brother. Flirting, or whatever it was this boy was doing, was definitely not something I was familiar with. "And how old are you, then? I'm sorry if I offended; you don't talk much and I only have my eyes to go by." The boy adjusted his glasses. "And you can see that they're not exactly the best eyes in the world." "I'm nineteen." Nineteen? Alex thought about it for a moment and made an unusual offer: "I'd like to take you for lunch tomorrow, to a little cafe I know. My treat. We can talk about books and college plans and whatever else strikes fancy over a couple of chai lattes." "Um..." I thought about my sister, and what my sister had said about dinner and this boy. Marie was right about my running into him, and I thought that was interesting. But more so, Lanny had plans... whatever that meant. But she said nothing about tomorrow. "I'm going home around five, I think... but before that, I suppose." "We'll meet there at 1, then. It's called the Dirt Candy Cafe and it's on 12th and Lewis. I'll see you there, okay?" Alex didn't like to linger, especially when he didn't have much else to say, so he slung his tote up on his shoulder and smirked. "See you ‘round." I waved, then opened the first page of my new book. I sat on the bench just outside the book store until my phone rang, and then I read while talking, and then while walking, and then up until nearly bumping into my sister outside a hair salon. "Hold on." Fifty-five seconds later. "Alright, what's up?" "Another new book?" "There's no way you're halfway through it already." "She reads quickly when she's got her head in a book, Marie." "Still, that's impressive." "I think we should get our hair done, Hayden." And that was the segue, elegant and brutal all at once. "You guys took a long time to call..." I looked down where the book mark had been put in. It was really only a third of the way. "Get our hair done? You don't want to grow it out or whatever?" I didn't understand what was really going on with the becoming girls thing, but I would have thought long hair was par for the course. "Length is important, but styling is important too and we take good care of our hair, but Marie was talking about feathering and layers and why a girl with short hair looks different to a boy with short hair and now I want to get our hair done." "We can't do that..." I bit hard on my lip and looked behind me, like someone was trying to listen in or something. I returned my eyes to my sister's and then to the floor. "I mean, we're going home tomorrow, so... so we can't get our hair cut like that..." "I..." I frowned and pouted a little, the reality of that situation catching up with me. Why hadn't Marie reminded me of that? "You... you're right. Gosh. You're right. I wasn't even thinking. We have to be boys again when we're at home..." Mixed in with the resignation of that comment was a definite undertone of sadness. A strange sickly mixture of melancholy. "We should go..." I didn't like that tone, and it had certainly brought down the group. Marie didn't say anything, and I could barely look up from the floor to catch my sister's gaze, following her feet as we made our way away from the salon. I felt like such a shitty person... I just wanted to go home. We didn't say anything on the way home. I didn't know if it was because we were all upset or if everybody had run out of words of if there was just nothing to say, but I spend the time thinking. And working on things and ideas and tonight and what I was going to do to reward Hayden for today. Marie had to go to the library - something about school stuff, I guess - and that left my sister and I alone. I wondered how honest her school stuff was, or if she had a date. I didn't like to think about that. We got into the dorm room and I took my sister by the hand, pulled her into Emma's room, and closed the door. Marie was picking up some things from her room and then heading out and that gave me the night alone with my ersatz-sister. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 3 Link to comment
Little Lamb Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 I completely agree with you, @diaperpt, and Sophie, their relationship isn't even remotely healthy. Lanny is pushing tio many buttons and Hayden is just accepting by sisterly pression and a bit of interest and fear. I dread what could become of this dynamic, but there's also New players at the table. Marie and Alex could really change the way the twins interact. Depending on circunstance surelly. I'm a little more than invested on this one. More than once caught myself looking for updates. Loving every bit of It. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 5, 2021 Author Share Posted June 5, 2021 On 6/3/2021 at 12:30 PM, Little Lamb said: I'm a little more than invested on this one. More than once caught myself looking for updates. Loving every bit of It. Sorry for the slow updates! I spend more and more time away from my computer these days, and I only update on days when I'm online. >_< New chapter incoming today! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 5, 2021 Author Share Posted June 5, 2021 11.) With the bedroom door closed, and Marie gone, I looked at my brother while he looked at his hands. He was so cute dressed the way he was, but I was going to make him even cuter - by his aesthetic standards, anyway. Coyly, I crawled up on top of him, straddling his lap, and put my hand on his cheek so I could look into his eyes. "Is that any way for a little baby girl to be dressed for bed?" I knew a bit of heat filled the space between Lanny's hand and mine. I bit my lip and took a deep breath. But before I could argue, Lanny slipped her finger between my lips, just like last time. I tried to turn my head and spit it out. "If you don't want my finger, I'll get your pacifier instead, the pink one - because you're my little sister, and pink is for girls. Girls like you, who need their big sister to put them in a diaper... would you like that?" Words were such powerful things - why hadn't I discovered this sooner? I felt my cheeks burn, and I lost my breathe. Instinctively, much to my distain, I started to suck on his finger and my headspace slipped even further. This wasn't happening... "Wanny... pwease..." Talking around his finger seemed to force the childish dialect, but the tone was all mine. Slipping... "I'm going to put you in a diaper, and one of my nightgowns, and get your pacifier. Unless you'd rather cuddle up and sleep while sucking on my finger...? Is that what you'd prefer? I know little girls like to suck on things..." Wow, my headspace slipped a little there and I felt myself blushing. I sucked a little harder on Lanny's finger and my head was swimming. Lanny slowly lowered me to the bed until my back was against the mattress. I felt so calm, despite the circumstances, like I was on drugs or something... "Lan..." "Baby talk only, okay? I like the way you sound when you're sucking on my finger." I took my finger out of her mouth in order to start undressing my twin, but I could just as easily replace it if she decided to be a bother about it. She was so cute, so pretty, laying there on the bed, vulnerable and soft and... gosh. "You're so pretty, Hayden. Such a pretty little girl." It took until my sister had my shirt off before I'd even thought to speak, like it was some forbidden or something like that. I bit hard on my lip and tried to sit up, only making it to my elbows. I was wearing nothing but the skirt now, the leggings gone as well. Lanny was rummaging through my bag. "This is silly, Landon..." I still used his boy name when I was trying to be serious, like Lanny was a joke name or something. There were a lot of feelings in my head in that moment, being called Landon was very sharp, and having her disobey my instruction bothered me too. I didn't much know what to do, and that's why when I slapped her cheek it was a surprise to me as well as to her. "My name is Lanny. And you don't say L's very well, so it's Wanny right now. Understand, missy?" I was quite angry, more than I realized. I opened my mouth to argue, but the slap still resonated on my cheek. I wasn't sure I could talk at all. I bit at my bottom lip and dropped my gaze to the bedsheets, my heart racing in my chest. She was right though. I shouldn't call her Landon... "I... I'm sorry..." "Sowwy." I corrected my sibling before unfastening her skirt and removing it, leaving her only in the pretty pastel panties I'd coaxed her into wearing this morning. Just like when I'd diapered her last time, she was very aroused. "Now, Hayden, sweet girl, I'm going to take your pretty panties off and put you in one of your even prettier diapers, because you're a wil' giwl and that's what you need, isn't it?" I tried to think of something to say, some comeback, some way to say no, to stop her, and... and I just... I couldn't. So I nodded my head. Gosh, why did I nod my head? Lanny pushed me back down to the bed, naked now except for... nope, naked now. I instantly felt the shyness over my body and covered myself up with my hands best I could. "Lanny... this is—" But the slap that came down on my thigh was aggressive and I instantly shut my mouth. Sometimes children need discipline, right? And I didn't like to hit my sister, but the playful smacks on her thighs certainly got results. "One more step out of line little sissy and I'll put you over my knee and spank you." I unfolded the diaper, feeling more confident than the last time, and laid it out. "Lift your bottom." She wouldn't actually spank me, would she...? But then again, I never thought she would diaper me either. I felt the embarrassment touch my cheeks and lifted my bottom cooperatively. What was I thinking... why was I doing this... Lanny taped the diaper on a lot better than the day before and I looked down with a bit of awe. I'd put them on myself for quite some time, but she was already as good as me... Once the diaper was in place, I balled up the night-gown like Mom used to do when putting t-shirts on us as kids, and slipped it over her head. The peach colored garment wasn't exactly childish per se, but the ruffled bottom hem certainly wasn't the most adult thing in the world either. It didn't quite cover her diaper and I didn't expect it would even once she was standing. "Go over there and look in the mirror, cutie." I motioned to the closet door with the floor to ceiling mirror. "I want you to see how cute you are." I didn't really want to. I already felt so foolish in all this, but it didn't seem like my brother was taking no for an answer. I climbed up from the bed and went over to Emma's mirror on the back side of her door. And there I stood. The night gown may as well have been a top, and I wasn't so sure it wasn't. Did it come with pants, too? I didn't look very grown up, but I didn't look like a kid, either. Maybe that's what gave me the courage to turn to my sister with a frown. "I'm not a baby, and I don't like it. Okay?" "Excuse me?" In a moment after that statement I'd pinned my twin to the mirror, my hand pressed to the front of her diaper and the sound of the crinkling almost deafening in the little space. "I think you are, little sissy. I think you are a lil' baby girl, and big sister is always right." She was so hard inside her diaper; I could feel it, and it was almost intoxicating to know the level of power I had over her. "Do I need to spank you?" I didn't know what happened. This wasn't my Landon... this was... different... I could barely keep standing, his hand holding me against the mirror and the other gently crinkling the front of my diaper, right where the erection was hidden. I didn't want to be turned on by this, but it was so difficult to help... "I... Lan... Lanny... I'm..." "Wanny. Wanny I am your wil' babee giwl. Go on." I knew it would sound immeasurably cuter in his voice too, and with my hand pressed against the front of his diaper, rubbing ever so softly that it could be mistaken as unintentional, I slipped my finger back between his lips and smiled expectantly. "I..." I tried to push him off me, but he held me tight against the mirror. My fingers were trembling. My knees felt so weak. This wasn't happening... it definitely wasn't. I was dreaming, or something... "I'm... your... wil' baby giwl..." "Yes you are... my pwetty wil' babee giwl, that's right..." We were so close to one another now, hearts beating together, the social stigma of boys being close thrown out the window and his erection pressing through the layers of cotton against my hand. I spun him around and all but tossed him on the bed. I climbed atop my sister, hand returning to the front of his diaper and my other one cupped his cheek and looked into his oh-so-pretty eyes. "You're mine. Say it, sweetie. Tell me you're my little sister." "Lan..." But with a harsh pinch to my thigh, my voice was abruptly cut off. He couldn't be serious... but my toes were tingling and his hand on my cheek made me feel so comfortable, and the way his fingers touched the front of my diaper was... well, it was very wrong, but... "Wanny... I'm... your wil' sister..." I shouldn't have done it, I knew I shouldn't have, but I started to rub his diaper softly in response to his answer. My finger slipped back into his lips as I did and I smiled down at my twin. "Such a good girl, so well behaved, so pretty, so little and perfect. The perfect little sister, that's what you are..." I'd figured out that the word 'little' seemed very potent early on by gauging the color of his cheeks, and I used that fact. I was in trouble. My thoughts had slipped completely, and even my brother rubbing the front of my diaper had added to it. I was such a vibrant mixture of turned on and completely docile. I sucked passionately on his finger while he played with the crinkling of my new underwear. I tried to hate it, but I really couldn't... The fact that I was sexually pleasuring my brother nagged away at the edge of my consciousness, but for now I was so easily able to ignore it. I continued to rub his diaper while he sucked my finger and I cooed softly. "I always wanted a baby sister. I just never dreamed that she'd be as pretty as you. I'm going to make you my little girl every single night, going to make it so you can't sleep unless you're diapered and cuddling with your big sis..." It was mostly talk, but I could feel the reaction it was having inside Hayden's diaper, could see the way he continued to squirm as I spoke. It was becoming a problem. I was really turned on, and this wasn't a game to Lanny. She wasn't going to stop. But none of that registered in the moment. All I could think about was cuddling up to my sister in a diaper every night for the rest of my life, the way I felt right now, and I sucked harder on her finger. "Would you like that? Would you like to be my little diaper princess every night from now on? We'll get you all sorts of pretty clothes to wear to bed. Footed pajamas and onesies and pretty pretty dresses and nightgowns... and I'll feed you a bottle and you can go to sleep in my arms..." Hayden was squirming wonderfully now, his eyes glossy and his sucking getting harder and harder. This was wrong, I knew it was wrong. But how could I stop now? The two were never intrinsically tied. I always found diapers and things a little arousing, a little special... but the childishness associated was never a turn on. And now, with my brother running his fingers along the front of my diaper, I couldn't think of it as anything but. And he wouldn't stop, no matter how hard I sucked on his finger, and for the first time in my life, another human being gave me an orgasm. I sucked hard on his finger while my body shook, filling the front of the diaper with warm cum, and it was so much better than ever doing it myself. I wasn't sure when it was that my lips locked on Hayden’s - whether it was before, during, or after his orgasm - but I did know we were kissing. Soft little kisses, reciprocated by each of us, teasing little pulls on one-another lips that seemed to last forever and ever even as his body trembling beneath the lingering waves of the passing climax. His lips were soft and glossy like mine and it was so incredibly serene - I never wanted to kiss anybody else again. Lanny and I kissed until I finally settled down, and then Lanny pulled the blanket over my body faster than I could think to do anything at all. He wrapped it around me and kissed my forehead, and before I could even think about asking him what had happened, I was already asleep. I'd given my brother an orgasm. I’d kissed him, and kept kissing him. Now he was asleep in his cummy diaper and dressed like a girl. My head was swimming. It was wrong. I'd done something wrong. But we both wanted it, so how could it be wrong? It didn't hurt anybody, and I'd never seen Hayden quite so serene. I could still taste him on my lips, the faint taste of cinnamon lip-gloss and the bubblegum tooth-paste he used. The heat of his touch. The way he quivered when he came and the muffled little noises as he sucked my finger. I still had his teeth marks there, cute little indentations. We'd crossed a line that twin boys should never even look at… but we were girls now, right? Maybe it was okay for girls. Nonetheless, I was awake a long while after my brother. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 3 Link to comment
YourFNF Posted June 6, 2021 Share Posted June 6, 2021 18 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: "This is silly, Landon..." I still used his boy name when I was trying to be serious, like Lanny was a joke name or something. There were a lot of feelings in my head in that moment, being called Landon was very sharp, and having her disobey my instruction bothered me too. I didn't much know what to do, and that's why when I slapped her cheek it was a surprise to me as well as to her. *sucks in air with a low hiss* Y'all need an intervention *backs slowly out of the room then turns...* Link to comment
Little Lamb Posted June 6, 2021 Share Posted June 6, 2021 20 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: Sorry for the slow updates! I spend more and more time away from my computer these days, and I only update on days when I'm online. >_< New chapter incoming today! No need to be sorry, little miss chatterbox, I love and savor each and every update. But Online life shoudn't be your priorities if you don't think so, or should, who am I to say anything about one of my Idols' lifestyle? Although with my new sheepest world order might change that... Sorry, What??? Many many many thanks for the great works you give us full access for free. You and Pudding are doing the """lord's work""" (I'm not religious sheep, but couldn't find a better expression) 2 hours ago, YourFNF said: *sucks in air with a low hiss* Y'all need an intervention *backs slowly out of the room then turns...* couldn't say it better myself... Maybe some fraternal therapy,, a little gender therapy for both too. Lots of safe time and space to figure things out... But who am I fooling? This is an S&P story, chances are they both get the strictest mommy/daddy into their relationship as Marie or Alex becomes more active in their lives. Just to show them the real sexiest thing is actually consent between adults... but between here and there there's probably a few dozen chapters of this kind of abusive power dynamic... Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 6, 2021 Author Share Posted June 6, 2021 4 hours ago, Little Lamb said: who am I to say anything about one of my Idols' lifestyle? Idol.. For real though - writing is a hobby. Even though I do somehow get financial support from it o_o (thanks to the patrons!) And I often overburden myself with obligations like "post a chapter every day!" I've been trying to step away from some of that and just do what I wanna do. Plus, like you said, all our stuff is free (eventually). So people can wait! That's not rude of me! (Right??) Link to comment
diaperpt Posted June 7, 2021 Share Posted June 7, 2021 On 6/5/2021 at 3:49 PM, Sophie ♥ said: the social stigma of boys being close throw out the window On 6/5/2021 at 3:49 PM, Sophie ♥ said: The two were never intrinsically tied. I always around diapers and things a little arousing, a little special... but the childishness associated was never a turn on. The above quotes feel like typos. If not, my apologies. On 6/5/2021 at 3:49 PM, Sophie ♥ said: I'd given my brother an orgasm. I’d kissed him, and kept kissing him. Now he was asleep in his cummy diaper and dressed like a girl. My head was swimming. It was wrong. I'd done something wrong. But we both wanted it, so how could it be wrong? It didn't hurt anybody, and I'd never seen Hayden quite so serene. I could still taste him on my lips, the faint taste of cinnamon lip-gloss and the bubblegum tooth-paste he used. The heat of his touch. The way he quivered when he came and the muffled little noises as he sucked my finger. I still had his teeth marks there, cute little indentations. We'd crossed a line that twin boys should never even look at… but we were girls now, right? Maybe it was okay for girls. Nonetheless, I was awake a long while after my brother. Gotta admit that this chapter had me mentally squirming. I can't bring myself to say this interaction was ok, but by the same token, while yes, it was sex, we'll have to wait to see how Hayden feels about this the next morning. If he feels it was rape, it was. I guess I have other reservations as well, but it did get me thinking. As for incest, while relations between brothers is and general society finds this very sick and twisted, if it's consensual, is it "wrong" because of incest? ...Hayden being manipulated (mentally, not so much hand through diaper)? ...homophobia? ...general societal norms being broken(shattered!)? ...all the above??? Why? How do we define this? Link to comment
Little Lamb Posted June 7, 2021 Share Posted June 7, 2021 21 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: For real though - writing is a hobby. Even though I do somehow get financial support from it o_o (thanks to the patrons!) And I often overburden myself with obligations like "post a chapter every day!" I've been trying to step away from some of that and just do what I wanna do. Plus, like you said, all our stuff is free (eventually). So people can wait! That's not rude of me! (Right??) Just for assurance: of course not, you and your lifes' choices in first place. It's awesome that you're no overburdenning yourself, as someone who does that a lot, I feel ya. But hey, I'm just a stranger in the internet who's a fan of your and pudding's works as artpieces and critical media of the established genres form our community, no need to liste to me MOAR CHAPTERS!!! heheh Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 7, 2021 Author Share Posted June 7, 2021 12.) The realization of everything that happened the night before really hit me the next morning. Lanny wasn't in bed with me and I didn't know what to do. I nearly ran out to find Marie before realizing I was still wearing the diaper. In a hurried state, I changed into the pair of panties I'd worn the day before and slipped on a pair of pajama pants. Why had I let that happen? What was wrong with me?! "Hey you." Marie was reading a magazine on the sofa when Hayden emerged, and Lanny wasn't anywhere to be been. "Your sister went out to get us all breakfast from a drive-thru. You must've been really tuckered out, huh? Sleep well?" She put the magazine down and curled her legs up beneath her so the confused twin could sit down. "Yeah... yeah..." I sat down, my hands already playing with each other. We'd kissed. She'd kissed me, right? And she... the diaper was definitely... I couldn't get my head around it. This was bad. This was very bad. On top of everything, of being a girl, of working through that with Lanny, now I had this... I thought I'd fall apart..."Wanna tell me why you're anxious before your sister gets home?" Marie leaned forward and took the boy’s hands, putting each of them on each of his knees, and placing her hands on top. She really was about the closest thing either of the boys had to a therapist, though Hayden was far more reluctant to talk. "Nothing to say..." God there was so fucking much to say! But what was I supposed to do?! Yeah Marie - my brother rubbed me off through a fucking diaper! I was trembling now - really trembling - and I felt tears on my cheeks. I didn't like this much confusion. I didn't like this much anything. I climbed up from the sofa, determined to head back to my room, but Marie held onto one of my wrists. "Hey. Hey. Seriously. What's up? Without using any names or personal pronouns, tell me what's on your mind." The technique tended to work with Hayden and Hayden alone - somehow depersonalizing things made them easier for him to deal with. But then again, she'd never seen him this worked up. "Please?" I couldn't... but I was falling apart, and Lanny wasn't here, and I... I didn't know what else to do... "A... um... a girl has a secret... and... her sister finds out... and..." She knew this was Lanny and me. It didn't help to depersonalize, not here. She'd know. I tried to pull away again but Marie sat me back down. She was so good at this... "Sisters... are sisters... and..." Tears were already pouring down my cheeks. "Sisters are sisters, and sisters love each other very much." Marie concluded and smiled reassuringly, giving no indication that she knew who the boy was talking about. "What did these sisters do, Hayden? Why don't you tell me, okay? Maybe if you tell me, I can help you work out what you should think about them?" She had to stay calm - she couldn't speculate, or get worked up - that would help nobody. Marie was just too good at this. I wiped my eyes with my shoulders, unable to get my hands back from Marie, and looked down at the sofa where tears had fallen a few minutes prior. "Um... sisters... can't... do not-sisterly things..." The word sister, surprisingly, sounded pretty normal already, even after only two days. "Like... boyfriend/girlfriend things..." Sisters doing... boyfriend-girlfriend things? Non-sisterly things? Had they...? Marie smiled and shrugged her shoulders. "Sometimes when sisters are close, they experiment a little and push the boundaries just to see where they are. But that's okay once or twice. My sister taught me how to kiss, did you know?" It was all she really had to offer; a one-off anecdote that had really made her feel kinda weird at the time anyway - but she had learned to kiss, so there was that. Was that what had happened? Had Lanny kissed her? "Yeah...?" I didn't know if Marie was lying or if she was being sincere, but I was doing my best to believe the latter. "So it's okay... it's okay once or twice..." Once or twice... and it was only once. This was fine. I was fine. Sisters experiment, Marie had said. I knew I shouldn't take her word as gospel, but it was so hard not to when it was this convenient... "Especially sisters when they're young and are just becoming women." Marie had been thirteen, with her sister at fourteen. Hayden and Lanny were older, but they'd only been girls a few days so that was basically the same. "There's a lot of confusing things and sisters help each other figure out what's good and what isn't, and help each other grow." Marie would be giving Lanny a stern talking to, regardless. Hayden was her sister! "Right..." That made so much more sense. I wasn't sure if it was Lanny's thought process too, but she was as new to being a girl as I was, all in all. Sure, we might have each other, but sometimes we're unsure of what that means. She was probably confused. I hadn't thought of that... "You're... um... really smart... about these things..." Somewhere along the way, I'd stopped shaking. The tears were slowing, too. "Comes with the territory," Marie smirked and pulled a few Kleenex out of the box by the side of the sofa. "So, do you think you know how you feel about your sister-friends now?" Depersonalization of worries was effective with Hayden, but Lanny was far too analytical for it to work on her. Marie would need a new tactic for when the older twin got back. "Yeah, I think so..." I smiled up at Marie and kissed her cheek. It was something we'd done since middle school, but since the breakup it had been seldom. I let go of Marie's hands and climbed up from the sofa. "I'm going to shower. Save me some food for when I get out, alright?" I left Marie alone on the couch and went into the bathroom. Shaving my legs wouldn't be so hard, would it? * * * "Did you kiss your sister last night?" Well that was one way to start a conversation. I frowned and set the McDonalds bags down, my cheeks lit up a little as I looked around for Hayden. "I... can neither confirm nor deny." "Lanny. Did you?" "I guess..." "How many times?" "Um... once...but..." "But?" "Well, it went on for a little while." "She's your sister, Lanny. Blood sister. You can't do that stuff, she came out here in tears, all anxious and messed up." "I know, it was a mistake. I just... it felt like... I wanted..." "Did you think about what she wanted?!" "She wanted it, too! She kissed me as much as I kissed her!" "This is so messed up, Lanny..." "Well it won't happen again. Okay? It was just a one time thing and it was... was..." "Gross?" "Wonderful..." I sighed and frowned. "Where is she...?" "Showering." "Her food will go cold..." * * * Admittedly, I felt better after the shower. Marie had helped. Marie always helped. I dried myself off and slipped back into my pajamas. Landon was always okay walking around in a towel, but I thought it was a little tacky. I pat dried my hair and returned to the kitchen, where the solemn tone was clear throughout the room. I sat down and started on my breakfast in silence. Marie was unhappy with me, but she'd get over it. She always did. Well, apart from the whole Hayden breaking up with her bit, but that was okay - she was mostly over that one, too. "What time do you wanna go home, sis?" I was hoping for a late departure - going home meant going back to being Landon and I wasn't really looking forward to that at all. "Whenever you want. I have an essay due tomor-" I froze in place, looking frantically around the room for the clock, which I found on the stove, where it always was. 12:18. "Shit, shit, shit..." I quickly got up from the table, my breakfast only half eaten, and hurried back to Emma's room. "Hey, what's the rush?" I followed my sibling into Emma's room and clicked the door closed quietly. "What happening? You have somewhere to be, little sis?" I frowned a little bit, curious if I'd been left out of the loop. "I have lunch." I said it like it was nothing, having made my way across the room and rummaging through all the clothes that Lanny had gotten me over the past two days. Ugh. Alex saw me as a girl, didn't he? So I had to wear something girly... "Lunch? But you don't know anybody out here..." Of course, then the penny dropped and I grinned like a little fool. "With the boy from the bookstore? It's the boy from the bookstore, isn't it? Oh my favorite days - my sister has a date with a boy. Gosh you move quickly sis." I didn't want her dating a boy... I didn't want her dating anybody! I... no, she could, I mean, I just... I frowned a little but turned it into a smile. "I'll pick you out an outfit. How much time do we have?" "It's not a date. He wanted to get... coffee or something..." Shit, what was the name of that coffee place...? I bit my lip and worked through the piles of clothes until Lanny held up an outfit for me to wear. It was a pink shirt, which I wasn't very fond of, and a pair of light blue jeans. In the end, I thought I looked like a twelve year old much more than nineteen. I wondered if she did this on purpose... "I'm going to pack your purse, you go and ask Marie to do your makeup." My sibling looked at me like there was any room for debate, so I grabbed her by the shoulders and guided her out of Emma's room into the living room and did it myself. "Marie, Hayden has a date with a boy." "Bookstore boy?" "Yup. Do her makeup, please." I closed Emma's door and left my sister and Marie alone in the living room. "And why am I only now hearing about this, missy?" "It's. Not. A. Date." I frowned as Marie pulled me along into her bedroom. She sat me on the vanity stool and I looked into the mirror. I wasn't sure how anyone ever saw a girl when they looked at me... "He just wants coffee or something. I mean, I owe him or whatever for the book, anyway. Plus, I like girls." "Well, you know even if you decide you like boys too, you know that's okay right?" Marie was pulling out all the stops today and she started by gently wiping down the boys face with a cloth and then got out a little tube of primer. She knew it was over the top, a little, but she was determined to make Hayden into a princess for her first date. "Thanks Marie, but I'm pretty sure I know if I like guys or not." "You should work on your voice too." Right. I'd forgotten amidst the oddities of last night... "Anyway, I don't. Alex is just a friend, and I'm a guy anyway. If he finds that out, he won't be interested." I wasn't sure why that hurt as badly as it did. I looked away from the boy in the mirror. "And what makes you so sure of that?" There was a more pressing issue, though, one that Marie decided to bring up as she worked on the boy’s moisturizer and foundation. "You're not a boy anymore, and you can't label yourself as such. It's destructive for you and especially for your sister. You're a girl. If you need to differentiate, you say "I was born a boy". But you're not a boy anymore." "I'm only a girl here anyway. Even if Lanny and I are girls now, it's still only around you. We can't be these people back home - we have lives. I have school and clubs and friends, and so does Landon. It's just not smart." I sat in the awkward silence while Marie finished up my makeup and started on my hair. "Be that as it may, you need to think about you going back home and pretending to be a boy, not coming here and pretending to be a girl. This level of acceptance is going to be the difference between Lanny blossoming and her withering. Which do you prefer?" Marie was working a slippery liquid from the palms of her hands through Hayden’s hair as she spoke. "I don't see why I can't just 'be' both and 'pretend' to be neither..." It was a little childish that I thought of things so abstractly, and it was something Marie knew very well about me. I was a very abstract person, and Landon was very concrete. For twins, we had so many differences. "Because you're a beautiful person and you want your sister to be as happy as she can be, and you know how absolute she thinks about things. You think she's going to be bubbly and peppy once she gets home? She's going to be miserable, and it's something you can do to help her be happy. Remind her that you're both girls, no matter what." Marie stood back from her work and let the twin finally look in the mirror. I looked better. I still didn't see much of a girl, but I could, at the very least, see how someone else might. But it was already ten till, and I suspected I would be late with traffic out of the college. "You'll drive me, right?" Marie nodded, and just as I was getting my shoes on, Lanny handed me a bag that fit on over my shoulder. "There's everything you might need in your purse." I was brimming happily in encouragement, but declined the offer to come along as Marie and my sibling went out the door. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 3 Link to comment
YourFNF Posted June 8, 2021 Share Posted June 8, 2021 Wow.. Good on Cassie staying calm and trying to sort things..... I'm not sure enabling the codependcy is the best move though.... Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 8, 2021 Author Share Posted June 8, 2021 On 6/6/2021 at 9:51 PM, diaperpt said: The above quotes feel like typos. If not, my apologies. Fixed! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 9, 2021 Author Share Posted June 9, 2021 13.) "She seemed a little bit off..." It wasn't like Marie to read too much into things when it came to the twins, but at the same time it was sometimes difficult not to do just that, especially when things seemed strained. She opened the passenger door for Hayden, and then went around to the driver’s side of the little compact car and got in herself. "Maybe she doesn't want me to go... but she'd just say so." Lanny was, if anything, direct. She wasn't the type to hide feelings or beat around the bush like most girls our age. Lanny didn't think about consequences very much. Conversely, I couldn't help but think about them. I bit my lip and pulled my feet onto the seat with me. "I'm nervous, I think... but it's not a date..." Who was I trying to convince? "Tell me about him - the boy? Maybe talking about it will help calm your nerves." That mostly, but also Marie was curious about the boy who'd asked out Hayden under the pretenses of her being a girl. She was very convincing, of course, despite her voice, and that brought about all sorts of curious questions. Did he know she was a boy? How would he react? Was he the violent type? "He's... he's nice, I guess... I don't know. He reads a lot. Bad guys never read, you know, so I know he's a sweetheart. He bought me a book. He asked me for coffee. I think he thought I was younger than I am..." But that's really all I knew about Alex. The little and somehow aptly named Dirt Candy Cafe looked like it might have been out of a movie from the turn of the last century, with two little tables and umbrellas out the front behind wrought iron fences and a shop-window with ornate lettering. Alex was sitting at one of the tables out the front, a little silver tea-pot and two slices of some manner of cake on a plate in the middle, and a book in his hands. "Gosh, is that him? He's cute. But like... fifteen..." Marie motioned as she pulled up the car a few stores down so as to be discrete and allow Hayden to wander up at his own pace. "He is not..." Maybe he was. What did I know? But he didn't seem like it... "I'll call you when I want to be picked up, alright?" Did he drive? Would he drive me home, or to Marie's, or whatever? Gosh, was he old enough to drive...? I decided I'd try to be a little more active today in my conversation. I climbed out of the car and made my way down the sidewalk. I was late, and when I sat down across from Alex, I made sure to mention it. "I'm so sorry... I woke up late..." "You woke up right when you needed to," Alex corrected with a little smile and set his book down, the cord from his bookmark keeping his place. He reached across the table and poured out a cup of steaming ochre liquid from the teapot into a little cup in front of the girl, and smiled. "They do amazing rose tea here, and I ordered you a slice of carrot and zucchini cake.""I don't think I've ever had zucchini cake..." I took the teacup in my hands and sipped it gently. It was hot. I didn't like hot liquid very much. I didn't like tea very much either, but it was still pretty good, and I didn't want to be rude. "So... um..." How old are you? Is that rude to ask? I sighed and looked down into the swirling teacup. Alex nodded simply, taking a small piece off the corner of his cake with a fork and guiding it to his lips, then habitually pushing up his glasses. "You don't say very much, do you? Most girls who read don't. I think that's why we read, because storybook characters spend as much time in their heads as we do." The breeze was mild and the sun was polite and there really wasn't much more to ask for in a day. "Maybe..." Honestly, I just read because I liked reading. It seemed stupid, really, but books were never very interesting to me. But reading, as an act, kind of was. And when I had to choose between this or magazines... "So, tell me about... you..." It was really all I could say. It was sure awkward enough to be a date... "I'm Alex. I'm sixteen and I'm a writer." Alex had his share of being called other things, too, but writer worked better than a lot of the other words. "What are you studying? You're at college, right? You're nineteen. What's your major?" And that was Alex - he'd turned a question about himself around so he could continue talking about Hayden. "You realize I don't know your name, don't you?" "Oh, right. Hayden." I thought about it a second, and probably for the first time realized how my name was as much a girl's as it was a boy's. I smiled sheepishly and played with the rim of my teacup. I wanted to take another sip, but it was a warm day. I refrained. "I go to school at Hollie Contemporary Institute, and I'm majoring in Medical Psychology." Hollie had a particularly strange way of going about majors, much different to South Kipton University, which we were just outside the grounds of. "That's a ways away, a few hours." It wasn't summer anymore, so the girl clearly wasn't home for the holidays. Alex sipped his tea and smiled. "Medical Psychology? What an interesting field. My partner thinks I should go to college to write, but what can they teach me in the matters of something so personal? I don't want to learn to write like somebody else. I want to write as I write and have that be enough." He was a little strange, wasn't he? Lanny would have said so. I didn't. I smiled happily and nodded my head, though I had almost no idea what he was talking about. "I wrote a poem in fifth grade, I think. And I like writing essays..." I took another sip of tea anyway and picked up my fork. Here goes nothing... "It tastes delicious - I know you think that's impossible, but vegans tend to find sweetness in places you'd never expect." And Dirt Candy was, after-all, a vegan cafe. Alex himself didn't identify as such, but only because he didn't like the label governing his behavior and associating him with any particular group of people. It probably wasn't any type of real cake, nothing I'd ever call cake, but it wasn't... terrible. I put my fork down and faked a smile at the boy across from me and took another sip of tea. Poor cake, to go uneaten. "My friend was vegetarian once. Her name's Hannah. She gave up after a few months, though." "Hannah sounds like a girl who's still looking for who she wants to be." Alex didn't mind that she didn't like the cake - it wasn't for everybody and at least she'd tried it. That said a lot about the lithe young thing sitting across the table. "I like your style, by the way. It says you've got one foot firmly in childhood and the other cautiously checking how the water of adult life is. Not many girls can pull that off, but you make it work." "Lanny picked it out," I said with a little frown. I hadn't realized I was giving off such an impression, and it was never something I'd do as a boy. I wondered how intentional it all was. She had to have known she was dressing me childishly, and that made my cheeks a little warm in the autumn heat. "Lanny? Girlfriend?" Alex was bold enough to make the suggestion, but that was only because he didn't strictly see sexuality as a thing that needed to be talked about. Hayden was blushing and Alex smiled, sipping at his tea. "Girlfriend...?" I blinked awkwardly up at the boy before catching on to what he was saying. Of course he didn't know! "No! No, no! She's my sister!" But really, he wasn't so far off, after last night. I did my best to smile, but the whole thing had a sense of embarrassment around it. I tried not to show it. "Oh, I'm sorry." Alex stated it only by way of comparison and decided to map out what he knew. "Lanny is your sister, and she picked out your ensemble. You two must be close, then? Do you both go to the same school?" The tea was long-since past and Alex wondered if he was making the girl feel awkward - he was always a little slow to notice cues. "Um, yeah." I smiled a little more warmly and took another sip of the tea. Despite the chill that had taken it over, I was enjoying it more. I hated warm drinks, and this seemed to help. "She's my twin, so we're very close. We do everything together. That's the way we like it, you know?" Alex had a sort of fascination with twins but only in the sense that they tended to share a sort of bond that few other people could. "You're lucky to have somebody so close. My partner has a sister, but I'm an only child. Do you both study medical psychology, too?" A girl came out and stood next to the table, with her hair shaved down to bare skin and two piercings in her eye-brow, a torn tank-top and jeans that might once have been seven pairs patch-worked. That was Mac - she owned the cafe, and despite her appearances, was about the sweetest girl Alex had ever met. "How's everything going kiddos, you two need anything else?" "I'm okay," I said with a smile, lifting my cup of tea and taking another sip. Alex seemed a little put off by my drinking the cold tea but I didn't mind. Alex, as well, shook his head and the girl started to write up our bill. "So you have a girlfriend, then?" But that made our waitress laugh and I looked up in confusion. "I have a partner." Alex smiled and took the bill from Mac, keeping it from the girl across the table. "Francis and I are both genderqueer - we don't identify with binary gender." It was something a lot of people didn't really get, but Alex was used to explaining it. "People grow up thinking you can only have one set of variables to define who you are, the masculine or the feminine and limiting yourself to that is like only buying half a box of Crayola." "Okay..." I had no fucking idea what he just said. But then again, I was a boy who was now living as a girl, wasn't I? I supposed, a part of me really should understand. Landon would have said something about it, but not me, certainly not. "That's nice, I suppose." Francis sounded like a boy name, too. I supposed Alex was gay, then, or some variant. "If you don't understand something and you want to, you should ask questions. If you don't want to, that's fine - you can see me as whichever gender you prefer to." Alex was used to it - most people saw cute, sort've effeminate boy anyway and there was really no way around that as far as people went. He had had high-hopes for Hayden, though; she seemed the open-minded explorative sort. "Oh... I'm sorry... I didn't mean to be rude or anything..." The waitress was still standing around, which I didn't really mind, and I did my best not to feel self-conscious. I didn't succeed. "I'm not really a question asker... I mean, I don't really say what's on my mind a lot, you know. I don't want to say something rude." "You shouldn't be afraid to speak your mind, in words or actions or anything else. As long as nobody gets hurt, there's nothing the matter with that." Mac aptly demonstrating her rule of thumb in action as she took the bill and the cash from Alex and then went back inside. "You know how it's okay for a girl to wear jeans but it's not okay for a boy to wear a skirt? Everybody gets bent out of shape over little things. Being genderqueer is about not really caring about that and just coloring in with whatever color you like. Gender's a spectrum, after all. Understand?" "Not really," I answered honestly, but I supposed there wasn't a whole lot of criticism on my end either. "I mean, I don't mind or anything. I don't get it, not really, but if it makes you happy... and your... partner or whatever, right? Who am I to boss you around you know?" But the words sounded stupider out loud. I put my tea down and tried to smile. "Could we talk about something else? I'm feeling... dumb..." "You're doing really well," Alex smiled reassuringly and slid his hand across the table. "All you need to know is that you can call me however you see me. If you see me as a boy, call me a boy. If you see me as a girl, that's okay too." The boy decided that Hayden was a good person the moment he saw her, but he only just now confirmed it. She was very good at trying. "Okay..." I did my best to smile and ran my finger along the top of the teacup. "I think I'm coming back next week, and the week after... actually, most weekends. My friend Marie kind of puts us up, you know?" And I'm sure Lanny wouldn't hear for a weekend back home... "I'd like to hang out next weekend if that's okay - maybe I could meet your sister, too? If she’s closed-minded about this stuff, we don't have to mention the genderqueer thing. I know it's a lot to take in." Alex was feeling happy, though - he'd made a new friend and that was certainly something. "You can text me during the week too, if you get bored." "She'll be okay with it, I think. And she's a lot more outgoing or whatever, so she'll probably even talk to you about it." The dig at myself hurt my feelings a little bit and I silently scolded myself for the harsh words. How insensitive I could be... "I suppose I should be going, then. Hollie's a long drive..." "It was very nice to meet you, Hayden." Alex stood up and saw the girl to the edge of the iron-work fence, but no further as she began to walk down the street. What a curious one she was. Alex had thought for sure she was gay on first thought, but she'd gotten very defensive over the idea of dating a girl so that was one question very swiftly answered. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 3 Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 10, 2021 Author Share Posted June 10, 2021 14.) Marie picked me up and Lanny and I started the drive home. We both wore our makeup and clothes because it made Lanny happy and it didn't make me unhappy. I put my head on her shoulder and decided to close my eyes. We talked very little about Alex, and that surprised me, but I suspected there was little to say anyway. He was just... a nice boy. And it wasn't a date after all. My sister fell asleep on my shoulder and I wondered about her and everything I knew now. I thought about how we'd joke about diapers for road trips and how that must have made her feel and I decided that I had to make it up to her. But by the time we got home, when the realization that I couldn't be Lanny anymore started to set it... I just felt sick. So very sick. I frowned as we pulled in and began to wipe back tears so Hayden wouldn't see as she woke up. "We're... home." We unpacked and changed clothes. Lanny was so reluctant, but we'd made our deal. I would be her sister, but here, at home, we had to 'pretend', the way Marie had put it. She seemed to like my wording. The next day, we both had classes. I met Hannah and Oliver at the lunch table before Lanny's class had come to an end, and Mimi ran up and threw her arms around me. "Wrong twin, Mimi." "It's not my fault, gawd, you two like, always dress the same. How's a girl to tell?" "How do you know which one you have a crush on then, Mimi?" Oliver grinned and heaped a spoon of bakery pasta salad into his mouth and Hannah piped up with a suggestion. "Maybe she just likes Landon's name better." "Than Hayden? Hayden is a good name. A strong name." The boy laughed and Mimi pouted. "I'll have you know that like, Landon is like, cuter - no offense but he just is. And he's taller too!" "They're identical twins, Mimi..." Mimi was the outcast of our friendship group - she was the girl no one really wanted around, but she was somehow around anyway. Oliver had nicknamed her Me! Me! since she was always thinking about herself, and while the nickname seemed to stick with my brother, I didn't partake. I didn't like to be mean. Still, the girl did try my patience. "He blabbed about you all weekend," I told her. "He keeps talking about these developing feelings..." I still had to get him back for kissing Marie. "He did?! What did he... oh my god, oh my god. Is he coming to lunch? I have to go freshen up. Don't tell him I was here!" Mimi bounded off to the bathroom and Hannah shook her head. "You shouldn't encourage her. How was your weekend anyway? You went away, right?" "It's a bummer. We got some pills and were going to go out, but we decided to wait for you. So Thursday I guess now, yeah? You're going to come, right?" "They've never done ecstasy before, Ollie. Don't pressure. But seriously, we'd love to have you come along." "It's not really our scene," I said with a smile. "We went up to Marie's." Hannah looked at me a little nervously and I did my best to smile. "Lanny kissed her and said it was me - that's why I'm doing the Mimi thing..." "Serves him right," she said harshly. "Anyway. I know it's not your scene, but you should come because these things are usually $40 a pop and we don't usually have the money to afford them and we wanna show you." "Don't pressure them, Hannah, ohemgee!" Oliver grinned, mocking his girlfriend. "What did you two did with the ex for a weekend? Rekindle old flames?"I was actually glad when Mimi came back, because I didn't want to answer the question. "You look really nice, Mimi. Just his type. I mean, really." And the next minute, Lanny came in and sat down, putting his head on the table. It was very unlike him and I saw an opportunity. "Oh God, Hayden! I can't believe you came in and acted like that! Fuck, man..." I quickly climbed up from the table, hurrying out of the cafeteria. Mimi stood there in awe, amazed that all the words I’d said were from Landon himself. "Wow, he really loves me..." "What, fuck, no. I'm Lanny!" "You don't have to cover for your brother, Hayden," Hannah said, continuing the bit. "I’m not Hayden!" "Fine, then what's my birthday." Hannah smirked. Lanny never knew her birthday at all - it was a very Hayden thing to remember things like that. "That's what I thought." And she hurried away from the table. "I think you just got owned," Hannah said smiling. I put my head back down on the table and sighed, looking across at the far wall with a little frown now that Mimi was gone. "Have you ever felt like everything lost its color overnight...?" The question wasn't posed to anybody in particular though, but I knew Oliver and Hannah were looking at one another with concern the way they did. I closed my eyes and sighed. Everything sucked. Today sucked. This school sucked. Mimi and her shrill voice sucked. Everybody sucked except for my sister and my sister was busy pretending to be my brother and running off pretending to be me if I were a boy. Which I guess I was. "You alright, kid? I don't think I've ever seen you so down. Is it just the Mimi stuff? You know how Hayden is with pranks - and you did start this with kissing Marie." Hannah and Oliver weren't fooled by Hayden's ploy - they knew the boy at the table with Landon. "That wasn't my fault, I can't be held accountable for that, I was..." I didn’t really have an excuse, did I? "It's complicated. And I said I was sorry. But it's not that anyway... it's not that. I just feel like I saw something amazing and now everything is so ordinary..." "I warned you about playing Geometry Wars and listening to Symphony of Science at the same time, man! Fuck..." Oliver shook his head and reached into his backpack, passing along a flask of whiskey. "Burns like fire, but a swig will help." "You still shouldn't go around messing with Marie. I'm amazed Hayden went with you!" "Ugh..." I got up from the table and walked away without a word - I just couldn't deal with it, couldn't deal with anything. It all seemed so pointless. By the time somebody actually found me, it was Hannah and I was sitting on the floor against the wall between the entrances to the men’s and women’s bathrooms. Why did we have to come home. "I don't wanna talk Hannah..." "Hey, just... come on, talk to me, please? I'm really worried about you. You're never this way - that's your brother. So come on, please?" Hannah sat down next to the boy - closer to the girl's side - and put her arm around Landon. She usually only did this with Hayden... "Let's go. Talk it up. Come on." "I had a really good weekend is all and now I feel like all this... this routine, this everything, this school, this life... I just feel like it's meaningless and pointless now and those aren't the same thing. They're just similar." I was babbling in a way I rarely did and I only realized after that little bit there that it was Lanny babbling - my voice had even slipped into Lanny-space. "Maybe you're sick, or depressed or something... did you talk to Hayden about it? He's always so much better at making you feel better..." Hannah pulled Landon close and kissed his forehead. "Come on. You'll get better, I promise. Everything does." "I know I'll get better... I'll get better by the weekend, I know I will. That's just so far away..." Truth was, I didn't know where Hayden was - probably in a class anyway. And here I was, cuddled up on the floor with Hannah and just so pathetic. Oh no, don't cry. Don't cry Landon. It was too late though, and I did my best to hide the fact with the palms of my hands, but Hannah saw right through it. I didn't cry - everybody knew that. "Jesus, Lanny... come on... come on, let's get up..." Hannah walked the boy across to an empty classroom with a frown on her face and rubbed the tears away. "What's up? Really? Because this is just so... Hayden. And I don't know what to really do, and I want to help..." To be perfectly honest, Hannah wasn’t completely sure this wasn’t Hayden. Even when they were playing as each other, Lanny didn’t cry. It was a weak point in their mimicry. "I'm a big girl; I'll sort it out. I mean, I'm all sorts of fucked up, that's all." The word girl didn't even occur to me until long after I'd said it and I didn't know if Hannah caught it any earlier than that, because I was busy trying to avoid eye-contact. I wanted my sister... I wanted my Hayden. I wanted to cuddle with him and play with his hair and hide away from this. "I'm going to my dorm...""Right..." The girl comment must have been a joke or something, something to do with crying, but Hannah didn't want to comment on it, not then. She offered to walk her friend back to his dorm, but he declined. So they parted ways. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 4 Link to comment
YourFNF Posted June 11, 2021 Share Posted June 11, 2021 I feel like unless there's issues with her parents and finacials Lanny needs to start publicly with her transition. This is going to eat her alive Link to comment
diaperpt Posted June 12, 2021 Share Posted June 12, 2021 6 hours ago, YourFNF said: I feel like unless there's issues with her parents and finacials Lanny needs to start publicly with her transition. This is going to eat her alive I was about to say the same. Open that closet door and it just won't close again. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 14, 2021 Author Share Posted June 14, 2021 15.) I didn't see Lanny until well into the afternoon when I made it back for dinner. "Hey, Lanny, you home?" Lanny was second nature to say now. Through the safety of my cocoon of comforters - I was cuddled up to Hayden's and then had mine over the top of my entire self, with another on top - I could hear my sister having gotten back, but I just didn’t have the energy to move. I'd been crying since I got back, and my eyes were puffy and red and I wasn't even sure I could talk. So I stayed quietly huddled away, even when Hayden sat on the edge of my bed. It took hours to get her to talk. It took another whole day to make any progress. But by Wednesday, both of us were drained, her from living and me from helping her live. I took that day off class and stayed home to make her feel better, and the more it happened, the worse I felt. We spent that night in silence. We were both so burnt out, and I started to wonder... how good a thing were these weekends? At two in the morning on Thursday, I woke up and I went into my sister’s room, almost on auto-pilot. He'd been sleeping with me all week, and I found his chest of baby things, fished out a diaper and - to my great amusement - a vibrating bullet, before going back to my bedroom. Slowly, quietly and gently I began to pull down his pajama pants. Everything was better this way, everything was. I knew it was. This made us closer. He didn't stir as I pulled down his underwear, either, and as quietly as I could I began to unfold the diaper.I always slept better on my side, and even as I rolled over, I felt my back strangely positioned on the bed. I tried to open my eyes, but the room was still dark, and then lips touched mine. It didn't wake me up right away, not the way I suspected it would, and I felt my cheeks warm up in the heat of the bedroom. Maybe I was dreaming. The lips came again and I kissed back. My brother was my sister and had her diaper on and we were kissing and it was wonderful and my hand gently traced down her thigh to the little control box for the vibrating bullet situated alongside his hidden-away cock. I started it slow so as not to startle her. I felt so alive. I felt my body jump as the vibrations surged through my torso and my cheeks turned scarlet. I was certainly awake now! I looked up at Lanny's eyes, blushing furiously, and tired to push him off me. "Jesus... y...you scared me... lemme... up..." I put my finger to his lips and then pressed my other hand to the front of his diaper, feeling the vibrations from within. That hand strayed for a moment to turn up the speed just a little bit and I spoke very softly. "Hayden my pretty little sissy, we're all alone and so sad, everything is sad and I want to make you happy..." Then I kissed him with a forceful tenderness that I knew he couldn't ignore. I knew he liked kissing me as much as I liked kissing him. "Lan—" But his kisses silenced me and I moaned into his mouth. The vibrations in the diaper were unbearable, and every notch the vibrator went up and I feel deeper into the sensations. I could hear the crinkling of the diaper as my sister touched it and I couldn't remember him having put it on me. "We... c...can't..." "We can. It's our bodies and we can do whatever we want..." I rubbed the diaper like last time, but not as forceful - really I just wanted to make the crinkly plastic sounds; the vibrator was doing the rest. "I've wanted to kiss you ever since we got back, and I know you feel the same..." To be fair, I did keep kissing my sister any time she tried to protest, but the way she kissed made it so clear that I was right. "Please, Hayden… be my baby sister who I kiss...?" The kisses silenced me and the vibrator sped up. I lost my breath entirely and the speed slipped back down to half. Talking was certainly out of the question; breathing was hard enough... I didn't kiss him this time, I spoke very clearly though, my voice definitely in my girl register. "I want you to kiss me. To roll me over and to pin me down and to kiss me. And if you do I'll turn your vibrator up and I'll rub your diaper and I'll make you feel so yummy... and if you don't, I'll turn it off..." "I... Lanny... you're..." I shook my head, my whole body quivering in anticipation. It just... it felt so amazing. So beautifully amazing... but it was wrong, wasn't it? "I don't... need you to... to do this..." But when he lowered the speeds again, I had a quick change of heart. I reached up and grabbed his hair in my hand, pulling him down on top of me and kissing him hard. Fuck, what was wrong with me?! I knew it! I knew it I knew it I knew it! And as my sibling kissed me, I turned the vibrator up again and let my hand rub the front of his diaper, my other hand slipping up under his pajama top and pinching and pulling and playing with his nipples the way I would a girl. The kisses continued, driven by him, lead by Hadyen and lavished upon me. I shifted to the side a little and one of his thighs pressed against my lumpy panties between my legs, eliciting a gasp of wonderful elation from my lips. "You make me... so... so... turned on... Hayden... I wish you knew... I..." He kept kissing me, and I kept rubbing his vibrating diaper, and softly grinding against his leg. I turned him over so I was on top, and the kissing continued. I was so turned on, and I hated that I was, but at the same time I absolutely loved it. I curled up against my brother as the vibrator spun all the way on. I clung to his body as the wave of pleasure rang through me and my diaper filled again with the warm sticky mess. In the end, as I continued to tremble, I collapsed on top of him. My hand wound up finding the control box as my sibling, entirely spent, gasping and panting and quivering cuddled up in my arms. I turned the dial to zero and whispered into his ear. "Tell me you love this as much as I do... that you want to do it more... that you want me to kiss you, even now..." He was exhausted and I expected he'd slip off to sleep in a few more moments, but I wanted his admission... I needed to hear it, in his words. "I... I did... I did love it..." But the next morning, when the memories had come rushing back, I was much less sure. It had happened again. Marie said twice, right? Twice was okay... but it couldn't happen a third time. It was Thursday though, and Lanny had class. I had an afternoon course as well, and it kept me mostly out of the way of my sister throughout the day. Time to think... * * * Hannah pursed her lips at Hayden when she sat down next to him on the edge of the brick-wall that separated the gardens from one of the walkways; he had a flower in his hand and was looking thoughtful. Nobody came down here this late in the afternoon and it afforded a modicum of privacy. "Remember when we were eighteen, and you promised me if there was something on your mind, you'd tell me what it was?" Tonight was the night Hannah and Oliver wanted to take the twins out to do ecstasy, and Landon had been a great deal better, but Hayden was... less so. "I don't know how you remember shit like that..." I smiled up at Hannah and looked back down at the flower. "It's nothing. Cheering Lanny up is taking a lot out of me, and... I don't know. He'll feel better soon..." I took a deep breath and looked up at Hannah. "Hey, if there's... if there's something that you do that makes you really happy, but because you do it, it makes you really sad when you're not doing it, and you can't do it all the time, is it better not to do it at all, or to be miserable...?" "I think it's better to eliminate the environmental factors that prevent you from doing it all the time." That was a basic answer and Hannah knew it wasn't all-encompassing, but it was a start. "I don't know if you've seen Lanny today, but he's bright and bubbly and cheerful and I don't think I've ever seen him so exuberant. So whatever you did worked." "Yeah... I guess..." So this was the trade off. I could make my Lanny happy on the weekends by dressing as a girl and happy on the weekdays by dressing like a baby. It didn't sound so bad, not really, but it certainly felt it. But this was my Lanny... "Yeah, you're right. Thanks, Hannah..." "Hayden... if you're in trouble, you'll tell me, won't you?" Hannah didn't know what it was about Hayden, but she felt like there was a sense of loss there, a sense of defeated resignation, and that wasn't something she was used to seeing in anybody, let alone one of the twins. "Yeah. Sure." I smiled up at Hannah and put my head on her shoulder. "I'm okay, though. I think I'm a lot better now, now that I know what to do." Or at least, I hoped so. But daunting couldn't even begin to describe it... "What are you and Oliver doing tonight?" "Hitting the club." "Right, that's tonight... maybe we'll come. I'll talk to Lanny." "We'd love to have you come along. Even if you decide not to do pills with us, you two don't do social stuff very often and this could be good." Truth be told, Hannah liked Hayden more than Landon, but only because she felt like she had more she could offer the more sensitive of the twin boys. Ordinarily, Landon was much more outgoing and friendly and easy to handle - he was more suited to Oliver. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 2 Link to comment
YourFNF Posted June 14, 2021 Share Posted June 14, 2021 This is not going to end well ? Link to comment
diaperpt Posted June 15, 2021 Share Posted June 15, 2021 5 hours ago, YourFNF said: This is not going to end well ? Things are getting messier and it does seem like it's only going to get worse. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 15, 2021 Author Share Posted June 15, 2021 16.) "Would you be interested?" "In taking ecstasy?" "Well, just going to the club... we don't have to take them..." We had barely been talking two minutes before I brought it up. As always, we were dressed identical. "It might be fun... get out of the house, you know?" "Uh huh, sounds like fun." I couldn't have fathomed it earlier in the week, but after last night I felt more and more Lanny - despite my attire - and that meant I was feeling experimental and a little invincible. "What time? Are they picking us up? What're we going to wear? What do boys wear to clubs?" We'd been to plenty of clubs, but now I was actually noticing what people wore. "I... I don't know..." I liked Lanny this way, even if it caused me a bit of stress. Having her happy meant a lot more to me than anything. And maybe ecstasy would perk me up - who knew, right? So we tarted ourselves up in our girl jeans and a matching band tee. "Marie taught me how to do makeup, so I'm going to do that!" "To the club...?" "Boys wear makeup too, Hayden." "Really...?" I didn't want to discourage though, so I obliged. We wound up looking very androgynous - we didn't wear bras, but with our tight girl jeans and form-fitting tops we definitely tipped the scale toward the feminine. The makeup certainly didn't hurt that image, either! "You look so fucking sexy, Hayden..." I didn't say it until we were standing outside our dorm building in the parking lot, waiting for Hannah and Oliver. With his thick-lined eyes and mascara-laden lashes accenting the slightly sparkling powder on his eyelids and cheeks, Hayden looked absolutely beautiful in an androgynous way. "Wow." That's all Hannah said when we climbed into the car, but Oliver had a lot more on the subject. "You guys are gonna get manhandled dressed like that. Seriously, man." I shrugged my shoulders and opened up my book. "You can't bring that in," Hannah said. "I'm going to leave it in the car - hush your blush." "Cool your pool!" I chimed in, grinning. "You're just jealous that you don't look so fine, Olliepants." "Olliepants? What are you, three?" "Oh, don't be harsh - he's clearly ten." "Don't you give me that - no ten year old has this sense of style." Hayden didn't say anything, but that didn't matter; between our thighs where we sat in the back, out of sight, I kept my hand intertwined with his and felt downright invincible. "Now you girls know not to drink anything given to you by strangers, right?" I didn't protest the gender-joke and I would've rolled with it, but Oliver piped in. "They don't look like girls. Just really queer boys." "Sexy boys." "Careful man, you're making me think you jumped the fence." "Nuhuh, I like girls." And I did. That the girl I liked was my brother didn't need to be said. I left my book on the seat, as promised, though I had every intention to bring it in with me. Hannah probably knew that, too. My brother took me by the hand and led me to the entrance to the club. Hannah and Oliver stopped just outside. "Alright kiddos, you in or out?" He had a bag of little mints. "In," I said without asking my brother. I just needed to relax a touch... Everybody knew that it was a lot worse to be caught with ecstasy in a business than outside, so Oliver gave us each one of the pills and with a little look of trepidation at my brother, I popped mine in my mouth and swallowed just before we got to the front of the line. "How long't this take to kick in, Ollie?" "For your skinny ass? Five minutes. Come on." We flashed our ID's at the doorman and paid cover and in four minutes and twelve seconds we were inside the club. There was a faint ringing in my ears, and I could feel my siblings heartbeat through our joined hands and the music thrummed and I felt a sense of elation.We couldn't drink. That upset me for the first five minutes, as much as the music did, and after that I couldn't give a fuck. I watched my brother dance and I followed him without trepidation. The pill really did perk me up, to say the least. All the colors were brighter, and everything was just so... interesting. Texture. Tastes. Smells. But there was one particular drawback - a set of girls on the dance floor with pacifiers that made my body quiver. God, they were sexy... Somewhere along the way my hand slipped out of Hayden’s and I found myself dancing in a sea of bright colors and textures and cheap plastic jewelry and by the time I found my way back to my sibling I was similarly adorned; my left wrist had a dozen borrowed bracelets and there were two necklaces around my neck. And in my lips, from I don't know where, I sucked on a pacifier. Hayden locked eyes on me, my skin shimmering with body glitter, the pacifier between my lips, and he closed the distance, pulling my body as close to his as possible with lust in his eyes. I couldn't be sure if I was aroused or jealous. My brother barely looked like my brother, and with the pacifier between his lips, I... I ran my fingers along his outer thigh, my lips coming down on his neck. Fucking, fuck, was he sexy... the pacifier in his lips, the little candy bracelets, the smile... I was moaning into his ear as I traced my finger up his legs. I wanted him so badly... Hayden's fingers were like little live-wires, drawing electricity up my thigh as he touched me and I felt my tight jeans get even tighter. I smiled coyly behind the pacifier and ran a hand down his back, my fingers playing with his ass as we swayed together to the music, mutual lust above the boil over into something altogether more physical. I wanted him. He wanted me. We were beautiful and everything was perfect. There was nothing I could do about it. I was kissing him, and kissing him passionately, as my fingers ran up his thighs. I wanted him so very badly, and I knew it. God, did I know it. And if it wasn't for the crowd gathering to watch, Oliver might not have noticed. Our lips were upon one another, the pacifier in my hand that wasn't fondling my brothers behind, his hand running up my thigh, fingers so close to the bulge in my jeans and we were so lost in the moment that we were halfway out of the club before I realized Oliver was tugging us out and yelling something or other at the two of us. I tasted the cool night air and felt the firm surface of the bench on my ass as we were roughly forced to sit and I looked up at Oliver as he yelled, only catching bits and pieces. "God what the fuck guys, come on. That's fucking fucked and you're fucking up my high and jesus you're brothers and fuckity fuck!" We both looked at him. Hayden started to giggle. I giggled too. And then went back to kissing my brother. Like anything else mattered. Oliver pushed us apart again and I couldn't help but smile. "Just. Stop. Stop touching each other. I have to... find Hannah..." Oliver disappeared back into the club and I sat on my hands, making sure not to touch my brother at all. I leaned over, nonetheless, and kissed his lips again. The pacifier was still in his hand. I wanted it so badly.... "I want to... to take you down that alley and... and make you suck on my p....p...p...pacifier!" I giggled wildly and then kissed him. Then pinned him down on his back on the bench. And kissed him more. And then I didn't know how but my hand was down the front of his panties that I'd made him wear. And everything was right with the world, everything was perfect. When Hannah finally found us, we were still on the bench, my brother's hand down my pants and the pacifier in my mouth. I was so turned on... so ungodly turned on. But before we could take it any further, Oliver was separating us again. I whimpered in frustration and shook my head. "Cut it out!" "Guys. Guys! It makes you horny. This isn't you; this is the ecstasy. It makes you wanna fuck like bunnies but come on, you're brothers. I know you're sexy and stuff, but you know you're brothers, right?" Oliver frowned and when I tried to slip my hand down Hayden's jeans again, he'd had enough and stormed off, leaving us both with Hannah. "Please... Hannah... I wan' my Hayden now... please... she's so sexy and she wants me too, ask her!" "You're really fucked up, aren't you? Did you have alcohol, too? Did someone buy you alcohol?" I smiled and curled up against my brother, my cheek against his, but then Hannah took the pacifier from my lips. I have no idea why. I have no idea why I reacted the way I did. I have no idea why the tears started and I began to cry. I couldn’t help it. Hannah was absolutely taken aback. "That's... mine..." I huffed and quickly snatched the pacifier away from Hannah like a protective parent and gave it back to my sister. "Tha's not yours, Hannah!" "Alright. Jeez. Okay. Look. I'm going to get you two some food, okay? It'll help. Can you please promise me not to fuck each other while I'm gone? Please?" The pacifier had found it's way back to Hayden's lips and I had my arms crossed and I nodded, doing my best to look stern. "Fine but don't take her pacifier no more, okay?! Meanie!" It was a little obtuse to have Lanny as the lucid one between the two of us, but I was really fucking messed up. I'd had nothing to eat all day, after what happened that morning, and I was entirely entranced with my sister-now-pacifier-protector. I crawled up on his lap and ran my fingers along his thigh. "Please... can we... find somewhere for us? I wanna... um..." My cheeks were burning up. "Uh huh... uh huh..." The part of me that promised Hannah was lost the moment my sister climbed up on my lap and began to tease along my thigh again and I looked around, not really sure where we could go. "You tell me what you want, Hayden. I wanna hear you say it in your pretty voice and then we will, we will we will..." My head was swimming. I didn't know where we'd go but I knew we had to go because I wanted my brother and I wanted him now and it couldn't wait anymore and fuck Hannah and fuck Oliver and... and... I felt my cheeks warm up. He really wanted me to say it...? I bit my lip and leaned in to whisper in his ear. "I really wanna... um... try giving you a blow job... I just... really fascinated... and you're just... you're my favorite, and... and you're a girl anyway, so it's fine..." I'd regret everything I said the next morning. We got up off the park-bench, my hand in Hayden's and the pacifier in his lips and a mutual goal in mind. It didn't matter where we went, it didn't matter at all - we could have done it right there and then if I wasn't afraid Hannah would stop us. We wandered out into the parking lot and then I fumbled the broken-door-handle to the back seat of Oliver’s car, opened the door, then pulled my brother inside. I slipped the boy's pants down his thighs in a heartbeat, my fingers running along the bulge in his panties. I'd never even had the opportunity to touch another boy other than myself, but he wasn't a boy, and this was normal, totally normal. People have sex on E all the time. So I lowered his panties and his cock sprung to life. I started to run my hands over it. My chest was pounding and this was so much more surreal and wonderful than any music in the club. My sister ran her fingers along my cock, my cock that had been rock hard the moment we'd started to dance and I started to breathe heavily, taking the pacifier from her lips and sticking it between my own. I wanted her so badly, so badly. "Pwease... Hay'en... pwease dun' wait..." Talking with the pacifier was awkward, but it only seemed to turn Hayden on more. For the first time in my life I took a cock in between my lips and did my best to replicate the boys in the porn I'd seen online. I kept bobbing my head up and down, lavishing his member with my tongue. It was a lot weirder than I thought, since I couldn't bite or suck the way I would my pacifiers. The only down-side of ecstasy-based arousal was how intense it was, how hard it was to draw anything out, and the moment his lips touched me I felt like I was going to cum. The fact that I didn't was only testament to my willpower, and my fingers ran through his hair as he continued to bob up and down on my cock. My brother. My sister. My Hayden. My Hayden was sucking me off. Oh gosh. Oh gawd. I wanted it to last forever, but I knew it wouldn't, I knew how close I was and how exhausting to hold back. When my brother quivered beneath me, I should of known what was going to happen. I mean, it's kind of obvious, right? But with his cum squirting into my mouth, I had absolutely no idea what to do. I did my best not to let any get on Hannah's car, and that meant most of it stayed between my lips. I sat up with blatant and hopeless confusion, my mouth full of cum, and my brother lying on the back seat. I was barely conscious, barely able to move, my eyes closed and my breathing ragged and the pacifier on the floor. "Hayden... kiss... kiss me... please....?" I didn't know that his mouth was still full of cum! I didn't know that he didn't know that he was supposed to spit or swallow. I didn't know any of that until his lips touched mine and I tasted something entirely new to me. My eyes went wide and I tried to stop him, but the moment we were kissing Hayden did know what to do and he made sure that kiss lasted until every drop of my cum was in one of our respective tummies. I didn't fall asleep, not really. Lanny still wasn't wearing pants when Hannah and Oliver found us, but his panties had been pulled up, still in plain view, and very obviously feminine. We were both cuddled together in the back seat, and Hannah was at a complete loss. She didn't know what else to do but to take us home, to her place. Landon had crashed pretty soon after getting back to Hannah's dorm and Oliver had gone home, which meant only the girl and Hayden were awake at 3am that morning when the ecstasy finally cleared out. Hannah sipped on a coffee as she watched Hayden in the arm-chair contemplatively. "It's kinda hot you know. You and Landon. I didn't want to say it in front of Oliver, or encourage it, but you two just... kissing like that? Really hot... I don't understand though, why was Landon wearing girl’s panties?" I shrugged. It was a lie. The ecstasy, despite the diminishing effects, was still somewhere in my blood. Things pulsed the way things shouldn't and everything was a little hazy. My brother was asleep, and Hannah was well and truly Hannah again. I felt more... drunk now, than anything. "Iono..." I kept the pacifier in my mouth. "Have you two... done that before? Kissed and..." Hannah had seen Landon with his hand down his brother’s jeans. "Well, you know. I knew you two were close, I just didn't know you felt that way for one another." "Iono... I mean, like, she's... she's so lovely and... and nice to me, and I know lots of people are, and lots of people like me and stuff, and Lanny's just special because she knows everything but she... gosh she's just... I'm not gonna find anyone like that, Hannah, and I shouldn't just let it get thrown away." I smiled up at her, despite the mild incoherence. "You know you keep calling your brother 'she' right?" Hannah rolled her eyes, but she didn't want to ruin this - how often does a girl see two incredibly gorgeous boys who have the hots for one another. "Oliver doesn't get it and he's probably going to be an asshole tomorrow, but don't listen to him, okay? If you two want to kiss and... other... stuff... you go for it, I say." And then, she couldn't help but ask. "What did you do, anyway...? When we found you in the car..." I felt my cheeks get red. I felt kind of like I was falling. The no food thing wasn't very smart. Oliver didn't know though, and neither did Hannah. I was in a perpetual haze. Eventually, my blood sugar would crash and I'd be out cold, but until then, I was falling. "Iono... I mean, I never did that before, so... I mean, it's not gay 'cause it's not a boy..." "You mean you..." Hannah grinned like the cheshire cat and scooted forward. "Did you and Landon have sex, Hayden?" It was a question Hannah never imagined she'd be asking her best friend, but there it was nonetheless. "And why do you keep calling Landon a she and a girl and not a boy? Landon is your brother. You're twins." "No.. it's... it's a secret..." I shook my head. The coherence was really lost on me. Every suck of the pacifier brought me closer to sleep, but each of Hannah's words put me in the real world again. It was an endless battle, and no matter how many time Hannah tried to remove the pacifier, I'd just cry and cry. "I'll let you keep the pacifier if you tell me the secret, Hayden. Wouldn't that be nice? You can sleep with it all night." It wasn't unusual for first-timers to find the teeth-grinding alarming. The pacifiers definitely helped with that, to say the least. Still, the way Hayden was with it was... almost child-like. Hannah hadn't seen that before. "But... but it's... mine..." "Then you'll tell me the secret." "I... yeah... um... well... Lanny's a girl, so... so I'm a girl, because we're the same... that's it..." I wasn't even sure why it was a secret anymore. I was so tired, but more than that, I was so exhausted. I didn't close my eyes, but my head was propped up awkwardly on the couch. "And why do you think Lanny is a girl, Hayden?" Landon was laying in Hannah's bed so she figured she'd just sleep on the sofa, which left the pull-out for Hayden. "Hop up, I'll take you into my room and you can lay on the pull-out and get some sleep." Hayden was four types of exhausted so it wasn't at all surprising that he was babbling like this, but it was the consistency of the babbling that was worrying Hannah. "Lanny is a girl! She is!" I frowned and shook my head, but Hannah had already pulled me into her room and plopped me down on the pull out bed. I looked up at her with a decisive pout and tried to talk about something else, but the pacifier was so relaxing, and the bed was so soft. I thought about trying to stay awake, but without Hannah's words, it was impossible. Hannah closed the door and flicked off the light, leaving the twins in their respective adjacent beds and laying herself down on the sofa. They'd had sex. Well, some form of sex. Hayden was dressed, so maybe oral? Incest was so wrong, so taboo, so.... so fucking hot, god. With no regret at all, Hannah let her hand slip down her panties and prepared to finish off her night with a happy ending over the idea. --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 2 Link to comment
diaperpt Posted June 16, 2021 Share Posted June 16, 2021 Oops! I don't think Lanny is going to appreciate that Hayden outted her! At least Oliver wasn't there at the time, but he knows far too much as it is. Countdown to trouble! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 16, 2021 Author Share Posted June 16, 2021 17.) The dreams were strange, but waking up was even worse. It took me a whole five minutes to figure out where I was, and my brother was still sleeping in the bed above me. I felt terrible, like really terrible. I shook my head and made it to my feet, wandering out into the living room. It was nearly afternoon. Fuck, I missed my class... "Hey princess.” Hannah was sitting on the sofa with her legs tucked up underneath her body, a silver MacBook on her lap. Princess was a new word to Hannah's vocabulary, but after last-night it was hard to resist dropping it in there. "Advil is in the cupboard about the sink. There's bacon in the fridge; you can just heat it up in the waffle iron." The events of last-night, incestuous and taboo... well... they were best not brought up just yet. I put my head against the hard countertop and covered my head with a plate from the counter. I felt so fucking horrible. The night before was such a blur, and still crystal clear. I knew everything up until we fell asleep in the car, and nothing after that. Idiot, idiot, idiot... "So you and Landon, huh? How long's this been a thing? Or was it just from the ecstasy?" For as much of Hannah that hoped it was the latter for the sake of the boys’ dignity, there was a whole lot more than hoped it was a re-occurring thing. Who hadn't masturbated over the idea of them two making out? "I don't know..." I didn't want Hannah to know. I really didn't. I didn't want anyone to know! Gosh, what had I told her? All I could remember was her catching us kissing... "It's only like... the third or fourth time it's happened. Lanny really gets me, and I guess... I don't know, I don't think anyone else ever will. Not like that..." "I think it's really really attractive. You two should do some picture sets for Tumblr; the girls there would go nuts over that. Twin boys making out..." She fanned her face and grinned, looking over from the sofa. "So how far did you get with Landon last night? Second base? Third? He was laying there in his undies when we found you." Undies. Panties. "Does he always wear girl’s panties?" I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't really see him in his underwear a lot, you know... but I guess for maybe a week or something." I pulled the waistband of my underwear up - a matching purple pair of underwear. "We dress the same, remember?" "You dodged the question, by the way. How far did you two go? Come on, how many friends do you have that'll be as supportive about this as I am? Tell me everything." Hannah was so easily distracted and for a moment the notion of the panties slipped her mind. It wouldn't be for long though, and nor would be the things that Hayden had said about him and Lanny being girls. Well, she wasn't wrong. Hannah was something of an advocate for obscenity. I sighed and turned my head toward her, the plastic plate falling off. "Um. I think... second... base? Wait, is that being naked?" If so, Lanny and I had been at second base since conception. "I don't really understand the bases thing..." "It's really simple. First base is kissing. Like real kissing. Second base is groping, but can also be hand-jobs or fingering. Third base is oral. A home run is sex, and a strike out is not getting anything." The girl stood up and fetched the bacon she'd mentioned from before from the refrigerator and turned on the waffle-iron. "Oh... um... third base, then..." I really didn't feel like confiding in Hannah what I'd done with Lanny, but it was very much like her to find out anyway. And besides, Lanny was a girl, so it was totally fine... right? "You gave him a blowjob?! Oh my god. Oh my god! Was it your first time? Do you do that a lot? Does he ever blow you or are you the girl out of you two?" And then the penny-dropped. The panties. The talk last night. "What's with the girl stuff, anyway? You were babbling last night about how Landon is a girl and you are too." Fucking great... "I really don't want to deal with this right now, Hannah... I had a long night..." Which, obviously, wasn't a lie. I moved away from the table and sat down on the couch. I was supposed to go to class today, but with how late it was, there was probably little reason. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get you pissy babe. But I want you to know that I'm completely in support of you two dating and doing whatever else. I'd love to watch you one day..." She grinned and handed him the plate of crimped and warmed-up bacon. "And if you two wanna wear panties or whatever that's cool too." "Yeah, well... I'm sure Lanny will love that..." Oh god. Oh god...! "Don't tell Lanny!" I sat up quickly, nearly causing the bacon to spill. "Why?" "Just don't." "LANNYYYYY." "Fuck, Christ, Hannah... fine. I just... if everyone around here starts being okay with it, with us being girls, he'll..." I bit my lip. "He'll wanna be a girl all the time. I just... I can't keep up with that..." "You’re boys." She rolled her eyes. "What do you mean, anyway? Be a girl all the time? Keep up with that? What are you doing up to...?" "What's all the noise...?" I stumbled out of the bedroom, rubbing my eyes, clad only in the sleeveless top I'd had on last night and the purple panties and nothing else. "You should put your pants on," I mumbled. Go away, damnit! "Right... pants... and those are..." "On the dresser," Hannah sighed. Lanny disappeared again into the bedroom and I dropped my voice to a whisper. "Just... don't mention it to Lanny, okay? It's not important. Just... stay quiet." "That he's wearing panties or that you sucked him off?" Hannah grinned and then added: "Do you spit or swallow?" I wandered back and buttoned up the pants, wincing at the light coming through the windows. "Is it like the brightest fucking day in the world here, or what? Fuck..." I squinted and pulled the blinds closed. I felt terrible. I felt my cheeks burn and I turned away from Hannah. She wouldn't say anything... right? But damn did she like drama. I bit hard on my lip and pulled my knees to my chest. "Are we still going to Marie's...? I doubt I can drive..." "I want to, yeah. I'll drive." Anything to be Lanny again. Last night was vivid in the space between my temples that made my eyes ache and I just wanted to smile and kiss Hayden and... wow, my chest was beating. "We can wait until later on today to go, though - I'm expecting a package anyway." Speaking of which. "We going to head back to our dorm?" "I don't think we have much choice. I need to pack." And by I need to pack, I meant Lanny needed to pack for me. I was still in the tight girl pants from the night before - Lanny the same - and our matching band tees. "Let's go then." I smiled at Hannah. "Thank you. For the pills. We had a great time. I mean it." And I did, too! Gosh I did. I looked at the clock and saw 2pm and smiled. Mail would be arriving at the dorms in an hour. "Come on, Hayden. We should shower." Together. Hannah smiled as Lanny and I left the apartment, but not before looking at me and putting her hand to her ear. "Call me" she mouthed, and I stepped out after Lanny. This was getting complicated. We had to walk home, which was less of a pain than it sounded. We were in different complexes, but not tragically far apart. * * * "I bought you a present." I wasn't going to tell Hayden at all, not until it arrived, but I couldn’t keep it to myself any longer. "Just a little thing... not very much, but you've been so good to me and I wanted to be good to you too. Show you how much I love you." I bit my lip and looked at my brother, now very much without clothes and just a towel around himself. I felt my cheeks pinken. Gosh, I shouldn't be thinking like this... "Um... yeah? A present? That's really nice..." Though it didn't really matter in the end. It was out of our joint bank account. "A present. A proper present." We shared an account so buying presents was difficult without it feeling like it was spoiled by the financial situation - but that was sometimes transcended by the potency of the gift. Literally, the idea was worth more than the cost. We used the term ‘proper present’ for that. "Alright... if you say so." Lanny smiled happily and went to take his shower. I sat and watched television for as long as it took for the knock on the door. I turned to the bathroom, but the shower was still running. "Hello." "Package for Landon McNeill." "That's me." "Sign here please." I should have waited to open it. It was rude not to. But Landon wouldn't get mad, and he did say it was for me, right? I took out the fabric - amazingly soft and covered in butterflies - before opening it up to see what it was. A onesie, like what babies wear, with snaps between the legs and everything. And alongside it was a pair of padded panties in the same print. No. Way. No. Fucking... I bit hard on my lip and folded it all back up, pushing it into the packaging. My cheeks were as red as cherries. It was only a few more minute before the shower turned off and I came out, wrapped in my towel, skin pink and legs smooth, and went into my bedroom. "You should get in the shower, Hayden, go on." I spoke through the door with a chipper tone in my voice - something inherently Lanny. "Right..." I was glad he didn't see me, not blushing as badly as I was. I undressed and flipped on the shower, a note on the tile, written in pink soap. "Shave." I frowned and looked at the two razors. I had never shaved before in my life... When I got out of my bedroom I found the package opened in the living room, hastily stuffed back together. What a brat! I grinned and thought about something I'd been wanting to try and snuck into his bedroom to find myself a diaper. I'd never put a diaper on myself before, but what I wound up with was one of the thick garments taped securely between my legs and barely hidden beneath a pleated skirt as I sat on the sofa and waited for him to emerge from his shower. My legs felt wonderful touching each other and the diaper crinkled quietly. The blouse felt soft and I was oddly content. I hoped he'd be as content. What if his fetish didn't extend to seeing others in diapers?! "Jesus Christ, you scared the hell out of me!" I had opened the door to find my brother-now-sister sitting on my bed. I still had the towel wrapped around me, but he was dressed in a skirt and blouse. "No. No, I am not wearing that." I walked right past him and into my closet. "We talked about skirts. I don't like skirts, okay?" He looked like a schoolgirl. "Oh..." I bit my lip coyly and shuffled back up on the bed, leaning against his headboard, knees together and raised, ankles apart. He had to see the diaper from there! As soon as he turned around, he couldn't miss it. Look at me you dumb little ditz; I'm dressed up sexy for you! I pulled a new pair of underwear out of my drawer - panties, unfortunately - and turned back toward my sister. "Pink today, right? Honestly, I can't imagine why you like this so much. They're so uncomfortable... and are we wearing the same jeans?" Dressing was always a huge hassle between the two of us. Fine! We would do it the hard way. I stood up and wandered over to where my sibling was standing, the diaper crinkling especially audibly with only the skirt to muffle it. Was he really so oblivious?! "Well... you should probably make sure our underwear match. And then once we're dressed we can go look at your gift together?" I felt my cheeks get red. I had already opened the package - didn't he know that? Maybe not... oh crap... "Well, what color are you wearing?" I was still sifting through my drawer, but no answer came. I turned to my brother, in his skirt, and crossed my arms. "You're really not going to tell me? You're the one talking about synergy all the time!" I smiled and took my sister’s hand, closed her fingers around the hem of my skirt, and then lifted it just enough so that she could see. "Kinda whitish purple, I guess?" They weren't the cutest of the two packs of diapers my twin owned, but she had more of these and I figured the others were her favorite and I didn't want to waste one. "Oh... oh!" My cheeks went scarlet and I quickly dropped the skirt. She was wearing a diaper? Why? What? When? I looked over at my chest, still tucked under my bed, but the latch was undone. Seriously...? "I... um... we really need to get going soon. It's already four..." I pouted a little, and then a lot, and sat down on the edge of the bed, knees slightly apart with the skirt partially ridden up. "So it's just a you-wearing thing? Not a looking-at-other-people-wearing thing? It's okay, I wasn't sure, and I knew this was a gamble and I'm glad I know now..." "Well, no, that's not really..." I bit my lip and looked down at my feet. Fuck, was she hot... "I mean, I like... I like seeing... I just... don't really know what to do, maybe. I mean, the only people I've ever seen were on a computer screen so..." "Well I'm here now and I'm not on a computer screen and you have full permission right now to do anything you want." I bit my lip and nodded to the living room. "I was going to model your gift, but I figured you'd want to be the one to wear it first. So..." The skirt was pulled up and I touched a finger to my diaper - my diaper - my smooth legs making it all seem so appealing. "I went for the diapered school girl look..." "Right, well... that's very sexy..." I still didn't look up from the floor. I called my brother sexy. Fuck, I'd never felt so awkward in my life. "Um... okay... okay, but... but this seems like something we should... try out, when, you know, we have time..." "We have all the time in the world. I told Marie we'd be coming up late tonight, so..." I stood up and took my sister’s hand, sitting back down and placing her hand on my thigh, so close to the diaper. "We can do whatever you like. Or would you prefer I just take this off...? I can if you want me to...?" "No... I mean, I just...." I sat down on the bed beside my brother and smiled. Or I tried to smile. "So... maybe I'm not like, super honest sometimes... and I don't like that I'm that way with you. But you're a lot better than me at a lot of things, and that's okay, I just really don't..." I took a deep breath. "Sorry... frantic, or something..." I put my brother’s hand on my diaper, and his other one on my top, touching the padded bra through the blouse. "This is all about you, Hayden. You've been so good to me lately, and I want to be good to you, too! And now there's a pretty girl in your bed wearing a diaper that will let you do anything to her..." "Right, but... that's what I mean..." How badly it hurt to take my hand off that diaper. Fuck, it was just... he was just... I'd never met a more attractive person in all my life. I wondered why I never saw that when I looked in the mirror - we were identical, after all. "I'm kind of a virgin..." Which Lanny would know, if it wasn't for Marie. But as far as him, and Marie, and everyone else knew, both Landon and I had fucked her. That was never the case. "You... you never... with Marie?" I bit my lip and blushed. "I could be your first..." Wow. Had I said that?! I didn't even know what the words were and then they were there and my cheeks were red and my head was spinning and all I could think about was how much of a girl I'd feel like if he fucked me. I shook my head and stood back up. "No." It was all I really had to say, the only thing I was really sure of. I tried to rationalize it a little more, but I wasn't sure how true any of it was. "I don't... I don't want to... not now. Not today. Not..." I looked down. I felt sick. Anxiety. I knew a whole lot about it, and it still never stopped this feeling... "Sorry... I lied... I did... with Marie... I just wanted to think this was special... for you... to you..." I stood up in the little outfit and diaper and crossed the room over to where Hayden was standing. I put my hand on his cheek and kissed his lips immediately, intensely and passionately. My lips moved to his ear and I whispered: "Please don't lie to me. I know you never have and it's okay." --------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 1 Link to comment
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