bedwetting Afternoon in the Chokey (Updated 1-23-25)

[Mazamune]

Hey there.

An other good addition to your story. You really know how to keep us on our toes. 

I think Carole will definitely have a field day with Jenny when she learn the news. 😁

With a more global approach they will maybe find a way to help Horthensia. Diabetes can explain a few symptoms of her.

Thanks again.

Cheers!

[SashaButters]

19 hours ago, Mazamune said:

 

I think Carole will definitely have a field day with Jenny when she learn the news. 😁

“I *slap* told you *slap* to get *slap* a second opinion!” *slap*

[SashaButters]

 Jennifer began to stammer. Pregnant? She couldn’t be pregnant? That was impossible! 

 

“Th-there’s no way!” Jennifer managed to spit out. “I can’t be! I-I mean, I just had my period five days ago!” It was lighter than normal, but it was there! 

 

“Some women still experience spotting. It’s normal.” The doctor said. She swiped a hand over her face and glanced around the room, mind reeling. She had been exhausted lately, and irritable, nauseated, and bloated, but she had chalked it up to stress. Even the binge eating. She never thought in her wildest dreams it was because she was eating for two. 

 

“I-I’m pregnant.” she repeated to herself as if to test the words out. 

 

“Congratulations.” Meaghan said, coming in with a clipboard in hand. So that’s why she seemed so amused. “By the way, I know it’s called ‘morning sickness’ but it will get you any time of the day, just a heads up.” Jennifer nodded numbly as her hand automatically cradled her belly. A baby…she was going to have a baby. 

 

“I can’t believe you had sex with him!” Matilda nearly shouted. 

 

“Of course she had sex with him, what do you think they're doing upstairs when we’re playing video games? Playing chess?” Hortensia said. Both Meaghan and the doctor began to laugh. 

 

“She’s got you pegged.” Meaghan said. Jennifer began to blush. So one of the kids had noticed. She thought they were being rather subtle, but apparently not. 

 

“What? Don’t believe in the stork?” The doctor asked amused, nodding his head in Matilda’s direction. 

 

“I read.” Matilda said before Jennifer could formulate a response. 

 

“Much too inquisitive, this one.” Jennifer explained. “Too smart for her own good sometimes.”

 

“Apparently not smart enough.” Hortensia said sarcastically. 

 

“Hey!” Matilda complained.

 

“Knock it off.” Jennifer admonished half- heartedly. Pregnant. She was pregnant. A baby of her own. Oh gosh. A nursery. She would need to make a nursery. And clothes! And a crib! A baby! Small enough to cradle in her arms. She pictured rocking them in a chair, giving them a bottle. First steps. First words. She’d get to be there for it all. 

 

Jennifer grinned and let out a laugh. She was ecstatic. No. Euphoric! No, Exhilarated! She was…uh-oh. 

“Bag! In the bag!” 

 

…

 

It wasn’t until Jenny had left without her that Hortensia’s situation finally began to hit home. She had really done it. She had really just got up and left her here. What if she didn’t come back? What came after three days? Would Jenny send her away? Her eyes began to blur with tears. Hortensia had refused to acknowledge her presence once she had learned of her fate. Her chest hurt. She regretted not saying good-bye and accepting her hug. 

 

“We’ll get you out of here once they’re ready for you.” The nurse said before seeing the look on her face and gave her a pitying smile. “It’ll be fine. There’s nothing to be scared of. You’ll be with other patients. You’ll go to both group and one-on-one therapy, you’ll color, get to watch lots of movies, and they’ll take a closer look at your medications. It’s not a scary place. It’s not like the movies. You’re not locked up with the criminally insane.”

 

Hortensia let out a weak chuckle. 

 

“Sometimes, life can get the best of us, and sometimes we just need to take a step back and unplug. This is the place to do that. No school. No work. No chores. Think of it like a vacation.” Hortensia liked the sound of that. Jenny could be a real slave driver sometimes. Just when she thought the torture of school was over, she was being told to mop the kitchen and do the dishes. So annoying. 

 

“Will I get a shot?” 

 

“I don’t know, that’s up to your doctor.” Hortensia bit her lip. “Not a fan of needles. I remember. If you let them do what needs to be done, it won’t be such a big deal. If you need a shot, you’re getting a shot, no matter how much you flail and kick. You cannot out-flail us.” Hortensia watched as she began shadow boxing the air. 

 

“You box?” Hortensia asked, mildly interested. 

 

“Yep, kick boxing and mixed martial arts as well.” she counted off on her fingers. “Gymnastics when I was little.” she let out a chuckle. “My parents wanted me to try out for cheerleading in highschool, only I joined the wrestling team instead. I said the uniforms were cuter.”

 

“Were they?” Hortensia asked, puzzled. Meaghan began to laugh. 

 

“Bloody hells, no, they were hideous. Imagine a single piece leotard that stops mid thigh and gives you the worst wedgie of your life as you try not to pick it in front of a crowd of people.”

 

“I have a punching bag at home.” 

 

“Ah, maybe I should tell them to watch out for you.” Meaghan laughed. “Got a fighter headed their way.” 

 

One hour became two, and two became four. She was bored and hungry. Her Gameboy sat beside her, the batteries already drained. If she knew she was going to stay here she would have brought spares. And more than one game. She had tried to ask for some, but they said they didn’t have any. 

 

 Finally, after around four in the evening, a man came into view pushing a wheelchair into the gap in the curtain separating her bed from the others. “Looks like your ride’s here.” Meaghan said, poking her head in. 

 

He introduced himself as Stephen and went over a list of rules that went in one ear and out the other. Hortensia never liked when the adults started with rules. 

 

“No knives, guns, explosives, shoelaces, drugs, alcohol, metal, belts…” he went on and on. “The crown this” and “the crown that” with a bunch more legal jargon thrown into the mix.“Any questions?” She shook her head. She had tons, but her mouth didn’t seem to want to work. “Are you bringing any personal belongings?” She held up her dead Gameboy. 

 

“Got something for you on my lunch break.” Meaghan said before reaching into her pocket and pulling out a four pack of AA’s. Hortensia’s heart leapt. She was saved! 

 

…

 

“Last stop, I promise.” Jennifer said once her and Matilda had gotten back into the car. They had just gotten back from the grocery store, where she had bought a home pregnancy test and, unable to wait until she got home, had run into the bathroom to take it. Positive. She was really really pregnant. 

 

“Where to now?” Matilda huffed. 

 

“The police station.” Jennifer said, ignoring the girl's attitude. She wasn’t happy about the news. She didn’t do well with change, but Jennifer knew she would come to accept it with time, like she had with all the other changes in her life. She was going to be a great big sister. 

 

When they got to the police station, they were told the detective that had been so eager to speak to her wasn’t in. 

 

“That’s odd.” Jennifer mused, sliding back into the car. He had made it sound so urgent. She let out a sigh. “Looks like it’s just going to be us for a few days.” Us…and the baby. She cradled her stomach and wondered what it would be like to feel him or her kick for the first time. 

 

“Isn’t that him?” Matilda asked. Jennifer looked up and saw an asian man dressed in a gray suit with a bowler hat. 

 

“Oh, good eye. Let’s go.” Out of the car and across the parking lot, they followed him to his car.

 

“Didn’t she say he wasn’t here? He just came out of the building.” 

 

“Maybe he was on his way out? Hello, sir.” she called out. He looked up and frowned at them both. 

 

“Can I help you with something?” 

 

“I’m Jennifer Honey, you wanted to speak to me. You said it was urgent.” Recognition flashed across his face.

 

“Right, sorry, didn’t recognize you. How are you?” But before Jennifer could answer he started talking again. “Unfortunately, as of this afternoon, your case has been reassigned to another detective.” He sounded annoyed. She wondered what happened.

 

“Oh?” Jennifer said. “Who should I talk to then?” 

 

“If you go to the front desk they can put you in touch with the right person.”

 

“Oh, alright. Do you know why?”

 

“I’m sorry, I can’t say. Please excuse me.” He hurried into his car and began to back up. Jennifer grabbed Matilda’s hand and backed away from the moving car.

 

“Someone’s impatient.” Matilda said. 

 

“Well, let’s go back inside and get this sorted out.” But when they went inside and explained the situation, they were told the person they were looking for wasn’t available. 

 

“I think she says that to everyone.” Matilda whispered. “She didn’t even check.” 

 

Jennifer shrugged, left her contact information, and the two of them left. 

 

“Hey, mom?” Matilda asked on the ride back to the house. “Why is Hortensia in the Insane Asylum?” Jennifer rolled her eyes.

 

“She is not in an insane asylum; she’s in the Behavioral Health Unit. Hortensia… she isn’t well right now. She’s having a hard time adjusting and the stress is…well…affecting her in odd ways.” Matilda was silently mulling this over. “Have you noticed anything odd? Besides refusing to eat.”

“Hmm, not really. She seems as annoying and bossy as usual. But, seriously, how thick do you have to be to think you’re poisoning anyone?” 

 

“Matilda, now’s not the time for name calling.” The girl let out a half-hearted grunt of acknowledgement. 

 

“The same level of stupid to think people are watching her with video cameras in her toys.” Matilda said under her breath. 

 

“Matilda! What did I just say?” But the words slowly began to sink in. “What are you talking about? What video cameras? What people?” 

 

“There was one night she was acting like a loon. I forgot about that.”

 

“Matilda! You don’t just forget.”

 

“Fine, I didn’t think it was important!” Matilda said, throwing her hands up in frustration. “I thought it was annoying, not concerning. She woke me up in the middle of the night and started ranting about cameras in the dolls. She was sleepwalking.” 

 

“Sleepwalking?” Jennifer asked. She hadn’t known Hortensia sleepwalked. Although… She thought of the pacing outside her door multiple times a week. “Why wouldn’t you say something sooner? Why would you think paranoid behavior like that isn’t important?”

 

She remembered what Hortensia had said when she had confronted her with Spot's remains. “I needed to see what was inside.”

 

“Because she was asleep!” Matilda exclaimed. “You say crazy lunatic stuff in your sleep all the time!” She had a point. 

 

“Okay Miss-Cranky-Pants, sounds like someone needs a nap when they get home.” Jennifer teased. Matilda crossed her arms, pouting, and remained silent the rest of the drive.  A hint of a smile curled up the corner of Jennifer’s mouth. She was still her little girl. 

 

She felt like nothing could upset her now. Not having to temporarily commit her rental child and knowing she’d catch hell for it afterwards, or the inconvenient police run around, or childish tantrums. Today was a day of miracles. She rubbed her tummy. Her little miracle. 

 

 “Is Mr. Fern having a party?” Matilda asked suddenly as they turned down the street. Jennifer stared uneasily at the dozen or so people congregating on Mr. Ferns lawn. Their eyes seemed to follow her as she pulled into the driveway. Your imagination. She put the car into park and turned her attention to Matilda.

 

“Bed.” Jennifer said. 

“What? No! Why?” Matilda whined. 

 

“Because you get grumpy when you’re tired. It’s been a long day full of surprises, and I am certainly exhausted.”

 

“That’s because you vomited eight times in the petrol station parking lot on the drive home.” 

 

“Who’s counting?” She said with an uneasy laugh. She had only been acquainted with the term “morning sickness” for less than a day and she was already over it. 

 

“I was. You threw up fourteen times today.” 

 

“Okay okay,” Jennifer said, ushering her inside. She cast one more anxious glance across the street at the congregation of people across the way. Jennifer got the distinct feeling they were staring at her as if she had just interrupted something. She grabbed the post out her mailbox before heading inside and tossed the mail on the table. She leaned against the kitchen counter to think. 

 

Pregnant. 

 

Her hands wrapped around her belly protectively. How far along was she? It couldn’t be that far. She had only been sexually active for the last couple months. She frowned. She had taken some solid hits from Hortensia. She thought of the elbow she had taken to the abdomen last night. 

 

What if they couldn’t get to the bottom of Hortensia’s aggression? Now that she was pregnant, she couldn’t be taking heavy blows like that. It was one thing to sacrifice her own body, but it wasn’t just about her anymore. 

 

“Hey, mom, what’s this?” Matilda called. Jennifer looked up to find Matilda holding up a piece of paper with a handwritten note on it. 

 

She stared at it for a moment trying to decipher the code. It was a list of Bible verses, she knew that much, but it meant nothing to her. Exodus 20:16. Proverbs 6:12-13. Proverbs 12:22. Proverbs 6:16-19. Colossians 3:6. Psalm 7:11. Ezekiel 7:8. 

 

“It’s just junk mail.” Jennifer said. “Everyone probably got one.” She crumpled it up.

 

“That’s weirdly threatening junk mail.” Matilda said with a scowl. 

 

“Threatening? What do you mean?” She uncrumpled the note. “Do you know what these are?” What was she asking, of course she did. 

 

“They're all about how God hates liars and will punish them.” Jennifer’s stomach soured. “The last one is ‘I will soon pour out my wrath upon you and spend my anger against you.’” 

 

Lovely.

 

She peeked out the window. They were all just standing there…watching her. She closed the blinds. If she called the police could they even do anything? Or would it just give them the satisfaction of knowing they had unnerved her. She didn’t want to scare Matilda and she was much too worn out to deal with their drama. 

 

“Nap time.” Jennifer announced. Matilda’s face soured. 

 

“I don’t need a nap.” she insisted. e

 

“I do.” Jennifer said. “And I need someone to snuggle with.” She made her best pouty face. “Please?” Matilda’s shoulders slumped in defeat. 

 

“If it’ll make you feel better.” She grumbled while looking away, arms crossed across her chest.

 

“It would.” 

 

They went upstairs where Jennifer stripped and collapsed into bed exhausted, her body aching in places she didn’t know she could. 

 

“Don’t you dare throw up on me.” Matilda said, crawling her way over onto Jennifer's chest.

 

“Don’t make me laugh, it hurts.” Jennifer said, letting out a weak chuckle and wrapping her arms around Matilda.

 

“I’m serious! If you puke on me I’m never cuddling with you again. Why are you laughing!?” 

 

“I’ve gone delirious.” Jennifer said. She squeezed the protesting girl in her arms and rocked her. “I’m just so happy.” Matilda gave an unenthusiastic grunt. “You know, no matter how many people we add to our family, it’s never going to change how much I love you. You’ll always be my girl.” She kissed her cheek as Matilda complained about puke breath, which only made Jennifer laugh harder and plant more kisses on her face. “You’re going to be such a good big sister.” 

 

“Does this mean you and Brian are going to get married?” 

 

“I don’t know.” 

 

A smile worked its way to her lips as she thought about it. Was she finally at a place in her life where she could look to the future and see happiness? She had a career, one and a half daughters, a baby on the way and… dare she think, a possible husband? It was everything she had ever dreamed of. Freedom. Love. Security. She fell asleep dreaming of wedding dresses and baby outfits.

[BabySofia]

4 hours ago, SashaButters said:

where she could look to the future and see happiness?

It would be nice if she ends with happier ever after hope. Hopefully her physical scars don't cause issues with the pregnancy! 

Hortensia probably did need checked in, but I hope things don't go too badly for her. Definitely something happening for her... 😥

[CDfm]

Loved the chapter but at the same time my heart feels broken.  I feel horrible for Hortensia.  Being sent off to a BH facility I would think would make her feel even a greater sense of abandonment. 
I am a little concerned about what the police department is doing.  There’s a reason the first detective was pulled off that case.  There has to a pretty strong reason for doing so as that definitely isn’t a common occurrence. 
The neighbors are just angering me at this point even though they do have some justification to be angry.  The way they have chosen to handle it is completely wrong. 
I am very happy to see that Jennifer is so excited about having a baby.  I am sure Matilda will be a great big sister.  I am looking forward to finding out how Brian and his kids feel about the news. 
I am definitely looking forward to seeing more of this awesome story. 

[SashaButters]

 

It was in the middle of one of her group therapy sessions when Hortensia began to feel the tell-tale signs of an episode coming on. She was beginning to sweat. She kept it to herself, the last time she had spoken up they came and pricked her finger. 

 

There was a much bigger problem at play and that was her need for the lou. She had convinced them she didn’t need nappies during the day. And she didn’t, even if there had been a few close calls. But she was feeling woozy now and her stomach was upset. Another side effect. She had had to go for a while now, but she had been holding it for as long as possible. Now she wasn’t sure if she’d make it even if she spoke up. They’d have to walkie-talkie her an escort and she’d have to wait. 

 

“Hortensia, is there anything you’d like to share?” The group leader asked. She shook her head. She didn’t share much of anything. “You know, you’ll only get out of this what you put into it.” 

 

“Pass.” she mumbled. 

 

“Isn’t there anything you want to talk about?”

 

“Pass.” 

 

“Hortensia, you need to start participating in these sessions.” She shrugged.

 

“What do you want me to say?”

 

“Anything you want. How you're feeling right now, your goals in life, school, home, friends. Anything that comes to mind.”

 

“I’m hungry.” she mumbled. One girl laughed. Another barked. He gave her a tight lipped smile.

 

“Soon.” he promised. “Isn’t there any concerns or questions?” There was one.

 

“Why aren't there doors in the bathrooms?” 

 

“For safety reasons.”

 

“I think I can pee without hurting myself.” Hortensia grumbled. “I’ve made it this long.” A few chuckles from the group. 

 

“Some of the medications we prescribe to our clients can make them a little disoriented and woozy. We’ve also had issues in the past of people trying to smuggle in prohibited items.” 

 

“But you make us undress in front of someone. Where would they hide them?” 

 

“Lily, no! She’s a kid!” 

But Lily whispered the answer into her ear. 

 

“Ah,” Hortensia said. She squirmed a little uncomfortably, but then began to chuckle at a thought.

 

“What is it?”

 

“I don’t miss the Nintendo 64 that badly.” The room began to laugh. Hortensia grinned. It felt good to make people laugh. 

 

“Let’s start with school. What year are you in?” Hortensia sighed. She wasn’t getting out of this. She’d have to fudge some details. Couldn't tell them about Matilda’s powers, Jenny would flip. Not like anyone would believe her if she told the truth. Jasmine said she was a dog and licked herself after meals and no one batted an eye. Might as well have fun with this. 

 

“Eighth. I skipped a few grades.” He had the clipboard. He knew. Still he said nothing like she knew he would. 

 

“And how is that? Do you like school? You're funny, you must have lots of friends.”

 

“Heh, yeah.” Hortensia said with a grimace. “Tons.”

 

“And your grades?”

 

“Straight A’s.” Although her grades were better out of the classroom, they weren't that good. Still, it was better than class. It was bad enough Jenny made her go to recess and eat with them. The only one she seemed to be on good terms with was Bruce, the only other loner. She had never said much to him in all the years she had known him, until this year. Everyone always made fun of him because of his weight (Hortensia included), but she had found he was actually kind of funny once she had gotten to know him. He was easy to talk to. He had even jokingly volunteered to hide under her kitchen table so Hortensia could scrape her dinner plate off to him like a dog when she didn’t want to eat. And he never interrupted her complaints of Jenny with “I wish I could live with Miss Honey, she’s so nice!” or “you’re so lucky!” 

 

Yeah… so lucky. Her mom was in jail for God only knew how long, and she was forced to live with someone who didn’t want her. She just loved being the third wheel, interrupting their happy little family. Hortensia wasn’t like them. She wasn’t smart. She’d rather watch telly than read a book. Jenny was probably counting down the days until her mom got out of jail and she could pitch her out the door. 

 

She always snickered when Brian came over though and Matilda got a taste of no longer being the center of attention. She knew why Jenny had gotten her that Nintendo and it had nothing to do with celebrating their one year anniversary. Someone couldn’t take a hint to scram.  

 

He nodded his head as if he was impressed. “Lot’s of friends, straight A’s. That’s great. You sound like you do well in school.” She shrugged again. 

 

“I’m not really in the classroom anymore. I was too far ahead of everyone, so I do school work out of the headmistress office with her six-year-old. It’s okay, I guess, but I live with them, so…” 

 

“The headmistress is your mom?” One of the older teens asked. Hortensia scowled.

 

“No, I just live with her. My mom’s in jail.” 

 

“What did your mom do?” the teen asked. 

 

“Killed someone.” Hortensia said. The room went silent. “I’m joking.” 

 

“You shouldn’t joke like that.” someone else said. She would have been annoyed, but her brain was getting more and more foggy. She couldn’t quite piece together what was said in time and she had stopped thinking about what she was saying. 

 

“What about your dad?” 

 

“He died when I was little. He was an astronaut. His shuttle blew up in space.“

 

“You better not be joking.” the teen said. 

 

“Hey, alright, let’s calm down. Everyone deserves our respect. It’s Hortensia’s time to talk.”

 

“Sorry,” someone muttered. 

 

“Now, Hortensia, how did you come to live with your headmistress? Did you know her outside of school? Were you close?”

 

“No, she didn’t like me. I used to babysit her kid, but she stopped letting me near me most of the summer. (And that was the thanks she got for saving her kids life!) She thought I was a bad influence.” 

 

“So what changed?” 

 

“Didn’t have anywhere else to go. I panicked when I called her. She must have felt bad or something because she let me stay. ” Hortensia mumbled. “She took in the other kid. That’s really the only reason I thought to call her. ” 

 

“And she took you in?” Hortensia nodded. “That was nice of her.” 

 

“Since July, but then my old neighbors tried to take me because my mom wanted me to live with them, but that was hell, and they tried to send me to some camp for bad kids” Now the truth was suddenly spilling out of her. 

 

“What was hell about it?” Hortensia looked away. 

 

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

“Not ready, that’s okay. So, you like living with your headmistress? Is she strict?” Hortensia shrugged. 

 

“We fight a lot.”

 

“What do you fight about? School?”

 

“Food, mostly. I thought she was putting drugs in my food because I didn’t feel good after I ate, so I stopped eating at home and she left me here. I don’t think she’s coming back.” She tried to play it off like it didn’t matter to her, but found her throat had begun to constrict with emotion. She swallowed. 

 

“Why do you think that?”

 

“Because she’s pregnant, and I don’t think she wanted me anyway. All we do is fight. I mean, she says she loves me and stuff, but she says it to everyone.”

 

“That doesn’t mean she’s going to abandon you. Just the fact that she brought you here means she cares about you. This is a place to heal, not be dumped off. This is a temporary placement, not long term. And if you do end up in long term care, it only means you need a little more help than we can provide. It doesn’t mean you're being abandoned.” 

 

“I hit her.” Hortensia admitted. “In the stomach.” 

 

“Why did you hit her? Did you know she was pregnant?” 

 

“No, and I didn’t mean to, it just happens. I get angry and can’t think.” 

 

“Alright, so maybe we can work on your anger while you're here. It’s a good start that you recognize it as a problem.” 

 

“I guess.” she mumbled. Her stomach churned again. Oh no. Oh no. She grimaced. She had lost the battle. She tried to focus on not crying.  

 

“So do you still think she’s putting drugs in your food?” 

 

“No.” Hortensia mumbled. “I guess I have some kind of blood disease.” She was looking everywhere but at him. They’d smell her any minutes now. Her eyes began to tear up. 

 

“Diabetes,” he said with a nod. “Things might improve if you get your blood sugar within normal levels. Do you find you get irritable when you're hungry?” Didn’t everybody? 

 

“I guess. I never really thought about it.” 

 

“I had a friend growing up who had it, when his blood sugar was low he’d start throwing punches. Are you alright? You look awfully pale.” 

 

“I’m fine.” Hortensia grunted, her lips in a tight grimace. She wanted to get cleaned up alone in her room and go lie down, but knew they wouldn’t let her. They had really been pushing food on her since she got here and they’d never let her sleep through a meal. 

 

Things here were very routine, even if the people were not. She was by far, the youngest, apart from a small group of teenage girls who followed her around trying to put up her hair in pigtails with rubber bands. Hortensia usually let them. They called her their little sister. It was kind of nice, even if one of them sometimes barked and the other two kept making out with each other when the staff wasn’t looking.   

 

The biggest shock of all had been the bathrooms. There were no doors! Not for the showers or the toilets. And because of her being admitted as an “E.D.” patient, they watched her to make sure she didn’t make herself throw up. She hated throwing up.  She had tried being civil. She didn’t have an “eating disorder” like Lily and Jasmine who they made her eat with.

 When explaining didn’t work, she yelled, and then she cursed, but no matter what they wouldn’t look away. It was horrifying. 

 

She was afraid to move now, afraid to push the mess around, and now she could feel the strength leaving her body bit by bit. An excuse. She could blame it on the attack. But still…

 

“Tens, do you need to use the restroom?” Someone whispered in her ear. A female voice. Worse. Her doctor. 

 

“N-no.” Hortensia said. It was too late for that.  They often came and “escorted” her before she spoke up. She never could sit still when she had to pee. 

 

“It’s okay if you do. This isn’t school. No one’s going to say no.”  She was the person she had to look sane in front of if she wanted out of here Tuesday. But if she went to the lou now, they’d know.

 

“We’ll get you an escort, hang tight.” Hortensia’s heart dropped. 

 

“I can go by myself.” 

 

“You know the rules.” she said before walking away. Hortensia grumbled to herself. She had been fighting them on the supervision since the moment she got here. She had refused to take a shower last night. It was too embarrassing. Now they’d make her.

She held her stomach and sat back down. She could feel cold beads of sweat dripping down her back. Her stomach rumbled. Now that she no longer had to poo she realized how hungry she was. She hadn’t eaten more than a few bites of breakfast on account of needing the restroom.

 

“We’ll break for lunch in about fifteen minutes. Do you think you can wait until then?” She shook her head. She didn’t want to go into the cafeteria like this.  “Female escort to Group Hall A.” He muttered into his walker-talkie. Hortensia clenched her hands into fists on her lap and counted down the minutes in her head as she listened to Lily, an anorexic teen, complain about how fat she was. They always made them sit together at meals to make supervising them easier. 

Lily had told her yesterday if she had been so worried about the food, she should have just made herself throw it up later. While it would have saved her from several fights with Jenny, she couldn’t do it. Not since she had seen Mrs. Rodgers stick her fingers down Matilda’s throat. It had freaked her out so much she hadn’t been able to get herself to throw up the edibles. 

 

She craned her neck around searching for an entering female. Please be the nice one. Please be the nice one. The door swung open.

 

Damn it. It was Mrs. “Are-You-Done-Yet?” 

 

“You can go now.” The group leader said. Hortensia sprang onto her feet, but stumbled. She was weak and wobbly. She only had a few minutes before she felt too weak to move on her own. “Woah, woah, sit back down.”

 

“I’m fine, I just need the bathroom.” Hortensia said. Wave number two had just hit. Her near frantic words sounded a little strange to her. She took a few steps and wobbled again before straightening herself and heading in the direction of her escort. 

 

“You sound out of breath today. Everything all right?” the nurse asked. Hortensia mumbled her response, holding onto the wall railing for support. Almost there. “Hortensia, did you have an accident? Your bottoms wet.”

 

“No.” she lied, pushing the restroom door open.

 

“Wrong door!” Hortensia backed out and went to the other side. “You sure you’re okay?” 

 

“Yes!” she rushed into the furthest stall behind the last partition and yanked her pants down, her escort taking the place of where a door should have been. Hortensia curled herself into a somewhat ball as she went. 

 

“Are you done yet?”

 

“No.”

 

“Are you done yet?”

 

“No.”

 

“Do you need me to turn on a faucet?”

 

“No.”

 

“Are you going number two?” 

 

“Yes.” Hortensia grumbled. Hurry up! Get out! Get out! Get out! 

 

“Why are you sitting like that? Are you feeling ill?” 

 

“I’m fine.” But she didn’t feel fine. She could feel her shirt glued to her torso with sweat. She gave one last push to finish and uncurled herself. She searched for the toilet paper dispenser and frowned. It looked so far away. Her arm felt like lead. Her heart was hammering in her chest. She could barely move. 

 

“You did have an accident. That’s what I thought. You need to speak up if you have an accident. You can’t go around like that. It’s unsanitary for you and everyone else. Try and scrape it out in the toilet before you get in the shower.” The woman lectured, but then stopped and reached for her Walkie- Talkie. “Medical event in the women's bathroom by Hall A.” 

 

“I’m- I’m…” but she couldn’t get the words out. She rested her head against the stall wall and closed her eyes. She was vaguely aware of more voices, but they sounded far away. The figures in front of her blurred. “Don’t weel goo.” 

 

“Check her blood sugar.” Hortensia pulled her fingers away. They were going to prick her. “Give me your hand. This isn’t the time for games.” She let out a whimper of protest, but felt someone grab her arm and pull her hand forward. She grimaced at the sharp prick of the machine biting into her skin. “Go get an orange juice from the kitchen. Her blood sugar is 49.”

 

“Hortensia, can you hear me?”

 

“Yeah.” she mumbled. “Can’t...” 

 

“Sit tight, okay, we’re going to give you something to help get your sugar up.” More hurried footsteps. “Thank you.” More unintelligible noise. She was going to fall asleep here on the toilet with her soiled pants down. Whatever. “Hortensia, do you think you can drink this? Hortensia, you need to wake up. You need to drink this.” With great difficulty, she pried her head off the wall, and with trembling hands took the cup of juice and stared into it. 

 

“Whatz it?” she slurred.

 

“Orange juice. Drink it.”

 

“Whaj ju put n it?”

 

“Drink it!”

 

“I don-” a hand had shot out and taken the cup from her and was forcefully pouring it into her mouth. Hortensia swallowed before choking and gasping for breath as the cup was removed from her mouth. She could feel herself falling forward. Someone caught her.

“Get her on the ground.” She could feel herself getting lowered until her face made contact with the cold tiled floor, pants still around her knees and poop smeared but hanging out. Could this day get any better? She had only gotten this bad a handful of times. Usually, she had enough strength to follow someone around if they led her, but now her body felt like it was filled with jelly instead of bones and muscles. She wanted to lay down and sleep in her bed, but the bathroom floor would have to do. 

 

Hortensia awoke to find herself still on the bathroom floor, her finger throbbing anew. Someone was pushing something past her gums. A tube. She grimaced at the sweet paste that filled her mouth. 

 

“Swallow it.” She did, but only so she could breathe. But after a few minutes of lying on the ground she could feel the trembling in her body stop. She slowly pushed herself up to a sitting position, grimacing until the world righted itself. Someone had removed her soiled clothes and wiped her down. She felt wet and cold. 

 

“Woah, easy, do you know what your name is?” 

 

“Hortensia.” 

 

“Do you know where you are?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Where are we?” She suddenly found herself feeling incredibly irritated. The ground was too hard and wet. Their voices too loud. The lights too bright. There were too many people. Three staff, other patients, her “sisters”.

 

“Leave me alone!” 

 

“Where are we?”

 

“Stop staring at me!” She sprung up to her feet ready to either fight or flee. 

 

“Hortensia, you need to sit back down and wait another ten minutes. Your blood sugar is still too low.” She took a few steps towards the sink and leaned over it. 

 

“Hortensia!” 

 

“SHUT UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE!”

 

“Hortensia!” 

 

She swung, her fist colliding with…

 

…

 

“She punched an old woman in a wheelchair?” Jennifer asked, exasperated. She could see Matilda trying not to laugh. She gave her a stern glare that wiped the smile off her face. This wasn’t funny. Now they wanted to keep Hortensia longer. She had bitten two orderlies who tried to take her blood sugar, kicked a nurse when they tried to give her insulin, and now she had punched an old woman in the face. And it had only been two days. 

 

“We’re going to be sending her back to the regular hospital to monitor her sugar. The most important thing is getting her diabetes under control. We redrew her blood today and it's come back positive for ketones. ” 

 

“And that is…bad?” 

 

“Very. Her bloods turned acidic. It’s a good thing it was discovered when it was. It means her sugar’s been too high. She’s a ticking time bomb.”

 

“But you said her sugar was low yesterday.”

 

“It’s been violently swinging from low to high. That’s why we’re transferring her. We can’t seem to control it with regular insulin treatments.”

 

“Is that normal for diabetes?” She didn’t know anything about diabetes. 

 

“It means it's very unregulated and hard to control. An unofficial term for it is called Brittle Diabetes. She needs to be seen by an Endocrinologist immediately. They might want to put in an insulin pump.” Oh geez. “Has she been under a great deal of stress or had an infection recently?” 

 

“Yes, she’s had both.” 

 

“That can play a big role in her swings. It might be the cause of why her sugars are so out of whack.” Jennifer thought about it. While she had fits here and there during the summer, it was nothing compared to how she came back. She was unrecognizable, destructive, distrustful and violent. But now they were finding out why. It was treatable. She knew there had to be something, but she hadn’t been able to figure out what.

 

“Should I come be with her while she sees the doctor?”

 

“That would probably be a good idea, they can answer any questions you have. We’re sending her back to the emergency department. You can ask for her there.” 

 

Jennifer hung up the phone and stood.

 

“I have to go back to the hospital, Tens is being transferred to the emergency room. Her blood sugars spiked again.” 

 

“Can I come?” Matilda asked, looking up from her work. 

 

“Let me talk to Mrs. Rodgers first. I’d rather you not.” She sounded unstable.

 

“Aww, why not?” 

 

“Because I don’t know what kind of mood she’s going to be in. I don’t want you getting hurt.” She made it halfway to Carol’s office before the first signs of nausea began to make its presence known, and by the time she walked through the door, she was pushing Carol aside to make a beeline for the bathroom.

 

“Hello to you too!” Carol called behind her as she threw up in the toilet. She let out a groan and flushed.

 

“This doesn’t feel magical.” Jennifer moaned.

 

“Who said anything about pregnancy feeling magical?” Carol said. She came into the bathroom and handed her a paper cup of water. 

 

“Don’t tell anyone.” had been the first words out Carol’s mouth yesterday when she had shared the news. Don’t tell anyone? How could she not tell anyone? And it was already much too late for that. She had been telling everyone she had come into contact with. The lady at the checkout counter. The guy at the bank. The office staff. Everyone had been so happy for her. Everyone except the people closest to her, like Brian.

 

He had not been elated when she had told him the news. Far from it. It had taken her by such surprise. He had been furious. She had never seen him like that. 

 

“You told me you couldn’t get pregnant! I already have three kids, you have two, that’s five kids!” Her insistence that one was only a rental did little to calm him down. “Rentals have return dates! When do you plan on giving her back? Huh?”

 

“As soon as her mom gets out of prison!”

 

“And if she doesn’t? Then what?” Jennifer didn’t have an answer for him. She had pictured him the perfect family man, but when he had opened his mouth and offered to pay for an abortion, Jennifer’s heart had nearly fallen into her stomach.

 

“NO, I AM NOT KILLING OUR BABY!” She had screamed at him. How dare he even suggest it. She didn’t even know if abortions were even legal! “How could you even say something like that?”

 

“Well, what did you expect? That I’d drop to one knee and propose?” he asked sarcastically. She had frozen in place, hurt by his words. And then he laughed at her and said no. 

 

She had told him to leave and had spent all of last night crying alone in her bedroom. He had called her this morning to apologize and said he would take financial responsibility. Jennifer had hung up on him. 

 

She downed the offered cup of water and wiped her mouth with the back of her arm. 

 

“Can Matilda stay with you today? I need to go to the hospital.”

 

“Is something wrong? Should I call an ambulance?”

 

“No, it’s not me, it’s Tens. She’s being transferred out of the psych ward to the regular hospital.”

 

“I…didn’t know you had admitted her.” Carol said. 

 

“They can’t get her diabetes under control.”

 

“I didn’t know she was diabetic either.” 

 

“I found out the same time I found out I was pregnant.” Jennifer admitted. All she had really been able to think and talk about was her pregnancy. “I was admitting her when Matilda made me get seen too. Damn kid had my insurance information memorized.”  Carol laughed. 

 

“Small favors.” 

 

“You threw up eighteen times.” Matilda said, coming into the bathroom. 

 

“Oof, rough day?” 

 

“Better than yesterday.” Jennifer said with a sigh. She had been a zombie all day today, trying to focus on anything else but her fight with Brian. At least now she had something else to focus on. Even if she wouldn’t have a husband, she still had him. She cradled her stomach. She had a feeling it was a boy. She had no way of knowing, but she just felt sure. 

 

“Have you figured out how far along you are?”

 

“I don’t know. I have an appointment in a few days to check.” 

 

“Good. Good.” Carol bit her lip and looked like she wanted to say something else, but held her tongue. Jennifer didn’t want to hear any more of her pessimistic warnings of a miscarriage. She wouldn’t miscarry this time. No one was throwing a pot of hot water on her. “Will Brian be going with you?” She winced at his name. “I’m assuming he didn’t take the news well.” Her eyes filled with tears and she shook her head. 

 

“He wanted me to get an abortion.” 

 

“What’d you say? Did you let him have it?” Jennifer let out a weak chuckle and wiped her eyes. 

 

“Told him to leave.” 

 

“Good for you. You’re finally learning to stick up for yourself. So are you guys done?”

 

“I don’t know. Maybe. It wasn’t the reaction I expected from him. I thought it meant we’d be a family and he just laughed at the thought. He called this morning and told me he’d take financial responsibility, but I hung up on him. I don’t want his money! I want him to be a father!” 

 

“Give him time, he’s in shock. There's still hope. He might just need time to process it. He’s going in the right direction at least.” Carol offered lamely. “Trust me, he is far from the first guy to wig out.” 

 

“I never thought he’d be the type though.” 

 

“If you don’t bring him to the appointment, can I go with you? It’s really not something to do alone.”

A wave of annoyance washed over her. There she was being pessimistic again. She thought she was going to get bad news! No, no, calm down. She was just being a good friend. Good or bad, she would want some with her. Once Carol saw everything was fine, the two of them could talk baby names. 

 

“Yeah, sure, thanks. So, can Matilda stay here with you?” 

 

“If she wants to.” Carol offered.

 

“She doesn’t.” Matilda said, arms folded across her chest. Great, how much did she overhear? 

 

“And if I let you check in the patients?” Jennifer cracked a smile. She could see the girls resolve wavering. “And apply bandages to scrapes and cuts?” Matilda did love to play doctor. 

 

“Okay.” Matilda said, giving in. 

 

“If I’m not back by the time school lets out can I come get her at your place?”

 

“No, take me back home!” Matilda whined. “I have a Nintendo! We can play together!” Jennifer sighed and handed over her house keys. She wasn’t in the mood to argue. 

 

“Wish me luck. This is my first meeting with her since checking her in. Pray I don’t come back with a black eye.” She had refused all her phone calls. She knew Hortensia was pissed with her, but it was time to sit down with her one on one and explain the situation. 

 

….

 

Jennifer felt alarmed when she pulled back the curtain. Hortensia looked terrible. Her skin appeared pale and sunken in, her eyes had lost their shine, and she seemed confused.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               

 

“Hi, Tens.” she said softly, taking a seat by her bed. “How are you feeling?” She tried to take her hand and give it a reassuring squeeze, but the girl pulled it away. Jennifer smirked a little. She was still in there. But her smile quickly faltered. Hortensia held up her hands to show dark, discolored bruises on each of her finger tips. 

 

“They keep poking me.” Hortensia cried. “My hands hurt. I can’t even hold a pencil to draw.” 

 

“Oh, Tens, I’m sorry you’re going through all this.” And she was. When she dropped her off a couple of days ago, Jennifer had been under the impression she would receive intensive therapy, not being treated like a voodoo doll. She grimaced as Hortensia pulled down her blanket to reveal needle marks over her thighs and belly surrounded by more green and purplish bruising. 

 

It didn’t take long for Jennifer to figure out how she had gotten this way. They came and pricked her finger, said her blood sugar was too high, gave her a shot of insulin, waited fifteen minutes and pricked her finger again. When it was too low they gave her a piece of candy. When it was too high she got a shot. 

 

“We think the infection she had a couple months ago caused her blood sugar to become more unstable.” the doctor explained when he had come in to talk to her. Jennifer clenched her fists in her lap. Another thing he had caused. It was like he was still here, hurting her. And those police…those…those bastards had asked her to accept a plea deal. Probation. They wanted to give him probation. They had gone from “we will prosecute to the full extent of the law” to treating Jennifer like she was a nuisance for wanting to go through with the trial.

 

She had told them where they could stick their plea deal. 

 

“I have something for you.” Jennifer said, reaching into her purse. “It’s a get well card from your class.” She set it on Hortensia’s table. “Can I get you anything? Do you want any water or ice?”

 

“I want to go home.” 

 

“Soon.” Jennifer said. She watched Hortensia examine the card, her face creasing in concern at the frown that had formed across the girl's face. “What is it?” 

 

“Nothing.” 

 

Jennifer picked up the card and read the childish scribbles of “get well soon” and well wishes. One person had even left her a gushing paragraph. Bruce, huh? Interesting. But there off to the side in neat handwriting was a bible verse. Proverbs 14:14. She stared at it distrustfully. She was going to ask about it, but a new voice behind her made her put the thought out of her head.

 

“I swear there are other nurses that work here.” Jennifer grinned at the familiar face. “How’s the morning sickness?” 

 

“Awful.” Jennifer admitted. “No, I don’t need a bag. I swear.” 

 

“Uh-huh,” Meaghan said, pulling a very familiar green bag from the dispenser on the wall. “I’m on my last change of clean clothes. It’s been a rough day.” Her eyes drifted to the girl in the bed. “For all of us.” 

 

“You stopped fighting them I noticed.” Jennifer said with a small smile. 

 

“That’s because I hear someone got put in their place upstairs.” Meaghan said before coming to her bedside. “Which finger?” Hortensia flipped her the bird. Jennifer shook her head as Meagan tested her blood. “Hey, good news.” She flipped the screen over to show Jennifer. The number meant nothing to her, but if the nurse seemed happy about it…”Normal range for the first time.”

 

“I’m going to have to learn what all this means.” Jennifer said with a smile. 

 

“No shot?” Hortensia asked.

 

“Nope, not this time, or candy, don’t even ask.” She said as she pointed at her playfully. “Don’t jinx it, we’re walking a tightrope with you.” She reached into her pocket and dangled something that made Hortensia’s eyes wide with longing. Batteries. Jennifer winced. She hadn’t even thought of that. Or her games. “Behave yourself and they’re yours.” She tossed Jennifer the pack with a wink. THANK YOU, Jennifer mouthed as she walked out. 

 

She handed Hortensia the batteries, who eagerly tore into the packaging with her teeth. 

 

“So,” Jennifer said, pulling her chair closer. “Bruce left you quite the note.” 

 

“We’re friends.” Hortensia said with a shrug. She didn’t know that. She picked up the card again and scanned the names. She frowned. Out of a class of nearly 20, there were only a handful of signatures. 

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize not everyone had had a chance to sign. I should have made sure your friends had a turn.” 

 

“They signed it.” Hortensia said, an audible bitterness in her voice. Her eyes fell on the scripture.

 

“Tens, what’s Proverbs 14:14?” Hortensia shrugged.

 

“Something about Jesus will heal you, probably.” Jennifer didn’t believe her. The look on her face. She was hiding something. Jennifer stood and began opening drawers. It was a hospital. There might be a bible. 

 

“You looking for something?” Meaghan asked, stopped mid step in front of their curtain. Jennifer gave a guilty grimace. Busted. 

 

“Can you look something up for me?” Jennifer whispered. She pointed to the verse in the card.

 

“I think my coworker might have one on her desk. Let me check.” Jennifer nodded before eying Hortensia wearily. She had made sure it had gotten to every desk. Had the others purposefully not signed it? 

 

“I’m sorry I hit you.” Hortensia said softly. Jennifer blinked in surprise.

 

“Thank you,” she said, rubbing her stomach before taking a seat. “How is it there?”

“Weird.” Hortensia said. “There’s a lady who thinks she’s a dog sometimes.” 

 

“Oh,” Jennifer said. “That’s, umm…” 

 

“Did my mom call yesterday?” 

 

Jennifer frowned. No, she didn’t. Eve never missed her scheduled days to call. But maybe she should ask Matilda just in case. She wasn’t in a good place. 

 

“I must have missed her.” Jennifer said. 

 

“Please don’t tell her I hit you! I’m really sorry. I didn’t know you were pregnant!” 

 

“You shouldn’t hit people regardless if they're pregnant or not.” 

 

“I know.” She whined, deflating into the bed. “They said it’s because my sugar levels dropped. They said that’s what makes me get all angry and psycho.” 

 

“You’re not psy-”

 

“Found one, sorry for the delay,” Meaghan said, bible in hand. “Just set it on the counter when you’re done.”

 

“Thank you so much.” Jennifer said. She opened the card one more time to read the scripture. Proverbs… Proverbs…here it was. She scanned down the numbers until she got to 14:14 Her fists clenched tightly around the bible. 

 

She had told a group of children that one of their classmates was sick and someone had written “Bad people get what they deserve?” 

 

“Tens, who wrote this?” She demanded. They hadn’t signed their name, but she had a feeling Hortensia knew. 

 

“There’s a couple kids it could have been.” she quietly mumbled. A couple? 

 

“Tens, have you been getting bullied?” she asked in shock. Hortensia shrugged and looked away.

 

“Names. I want names.” 

 

“It doesn’t matter.” 

 

“Yes, it does matter.” 

 

“There the kids that went to my old church. Erica, Sarah, and them.” Erica, Sarah and them?

 

“Tens, I thought those kids were your friends.” 

 

“Not for a while.” 

 

“Since when? How long is a while?” But Hortensia would say no more. 

 

Overall, the visit had gone much better than Jennifer had expected. Hortensia didn’t seem to emanate loathing towards her.  They talked some more about day to day life until she looked up to find someone unexpected standing by the curtain. Jennifer smiled.

 

“Bruce! Please, join us.” He smiled shyly at them and waved. “Thank you for coming!”

 

“I heard you were sick.” 

 

“Mate, look what they bloody did to my hands!” Hortensia held up her fingers and shook them in agony. Jennifer smiled and got up from her chair. 

 

“Tens, i’ll come back and see you tomorrow, alright? Is there anything you want me to bring?” 

 

“My drawing stuff! Oh, and more games!”

 

“Alright, I’ll let you two visit. Be good Tens, don’t give them too hard a time. They're only trying to help.” She took the card with her as she left, a pang of disappointment in her students. But she felt hopeful again. Hortensia was getting the treatment she needed. They were finally finding answers. 

 

She headed towards her car breathing in the cold November air.  What an emotional roller coaster this week has been. Something caught her eye. There was a folder tucked under her windshield wipers. An advertisement for a car wash perhaps? Chinese take out menu? But it was neither of those things. She opened it to reveal a printed page with a handwritten sticky note on top. 

 

Keep Fighting. Pressure to drop coming from the top. 

[CDfm]

Such a roller coaster ride again.  I about bust a gut in the beginning.  “I don’t miss the Nintendo 64 that much”. You do come up with some great one liners. 
I am very thankful that someone was able to figure out what was going on with Hortensia.  I would have thought with all the bloodwork they had been doing on her something would have shown up before this.  At least they know what’s happening and can now work on resolving it. 
I would never condone violence especially against a church, but accidents happen and I really believe maybe Matilda could cause an electrical fire or two or three! To have that kind of influence even into the upper echelons of the Police Department definitely needs to be knocked down a peg or two. 
I was also pretty disappointed in Brian.  If you are going to be a man enough to do the deed then you need to be a man and face the consequences of your actions. That’s more than taking financial responsibility.  You created a life and now it’s your responsibility to raise that child correctly.  It doesn’t have to be actually with the mother but he needs to be completely involved and a part of that child’s life. 
Amazing chapter and story overall. I would give it at least two likes per chapter but they limit me to one. I am looking forward to seeing more. 

[BabySofia]

I don't envy the road they're going to have trying to control her diabetes. She's just starting puberty and that's only making it all worse.

Rather surprised her boyfriend took things so badly... hope someone gives him a swift kick in the ass and he gets his act together!

Cryptic note at the end... Somehow I don't think she even needed to be told that though!

[SashaButters]

Of all the things Jennifer thought she’d walk into her rental daughters hospital room to find, it wasn’t her, butt-naked save for a layer of fecal matter, arms and legs flailing in a tantrum-esque way, against her nurse, who was equally covered in excrement.  

 

One look, one smell, and it was over for her. 

 

“Eww, wh-what happened to you?” she heard Matilda ask bluntly. Jennifer would like to know the same, but she was currently busy upchucking her breakfast in the small attached bathroom. 

 

“Hortensia! Stop it!” the nurse cried out in a frustrated sounding Irish accent. “You’re getting it everywhere!” 

 

Hortensia began to garble and scream out a few unintelligible wails. Jennifer doubted anyone had understood, but she was surprised to find Matilda responded with, “uhh, yeah, I see that.” 

 

“What’s going on?” Jennifer moaned, face resting against the toilet seat. More unintelligible babble from Hortensia. 

 

“She said her stomach hurt, but they wouldn’t let her use the restroom.” 

 

“Like i’ve told ya fifty-times already! Ya can’t get up when your blood sugars low! I offered you a bedpan twenty minutes ago, and you said you didn’t need it! Then I come back and find you rolling in it!” Hortensia began to cry harder. Jennifer understood. She flushed, wiped her mouth, took a deep breath and emerged from the bathroom. And in her best “scary mom” voice she could muster, laid in on her. 

 

“Tens, I get that you don’t feel well, and I get that it’s gross, but that is no excuse for you to be acting like this! You think she wants to be covered in your poo and cleaning you up when other people need her help? And here you are, acting like a giant toddler throwing a tantrum.”

 

Hortensia quieted and stilled at once. She gazed up at her in shock.

 

“Now,” Jennifer said in a calmer voice, “I understand why you’d rather use the toilet. Anyone would! But there are rules in place for a reason! And no matter how much you cry, and fight, the rules aren’t getting bent for you. Do you understand? If they say you’re getting a shot. Guess what? You’re getting a shot! If the doctor says you have to stay in bed; you’re not getting up! And if they say you need to shite in a damn bucket, then you're shitting in a damn bucket!” Hortensia’s eyes nearly bugged out at her use of expletives, but she had gotten the point across. Sometimes it felt like swearing was the only way to get on the same wavelength as her. 

 

“Go mum!” The nurse snickered.

 

“She’s not my mom!” Hortensia cried, but much less violently now. 

 

“I call her my rental child since I have to give her back at some point.” Jennifer explained. “She’s staying with me while her mom’s… out of town.” 

 

“Good luck with that.” The nurse said. “She’s been a…handful.” Code for “a downright terror” she was sure.

 

“She’s going through a lot.” Jennifer said with an apologetic grimace before turning back to the girl. “We need to make sure this doesn’t happen again.” 

 

“It’s- It’s the medicine!” Hortensia cried. 

 

“That’s not what I mean. If you would have done what you're told, you wouldn’t be sitting there covered in…. “

 

“I-I-I tr-tried to-to-to ca-call! No-no one c-c-came!”

 

“They have things to do, they aren't coming back every five minutes to see if you’ve changed your mind.”

 

“I- I didn’t ha-have to then! And that was hours ago!” Jennifer didn’t believe her. The more likely conclusion was Hortensia was waiting to ask someone else in hopes of getting the answer she wanted. Only no one else came by. 

 

“Look, it’s one of the unpleasant realities of being ill. There is no privacy, or dignity. You’re going to have to do unpleasant things out of necessity.”

 

“But it's right bloody there!” Hortensia said, gesturing wildly to the restroom door. “There’s nothing wrong with my legs!” 

 

“No more of this, Tens, it’s time to calm down. You’re not getting your way here.”

 

“I only had to wee a little!” Hortensia lamented. “It hit my stomach after! Even if I used it, it would have prevented nothing!” Jennifer smirked at her.

 

“Well, alright, Tens, since you’re feeling so poorly, it sounds like there’s only one option to prevent this from happening again. I’ll tell them you need to stay in nappy’s.”

 

“I think that’s a great idea. An appropriate garment for someone acting this way.” The nurse chimed in. 

 

“I hate you.” Hortensia growled.

 

“It’s the only option that makes sense.” Jennifer said. “Now you have nothing to worry about.” She placed the bag of games on the counter just out of arm's reach. “You can have these when she feels you’ve earned them.” Hortensia refused to meet her eyes. “We have to go to school now, if I come see you during lunch will you be in a better mood?” Hortensia said nothing. 

 

 “Mom, you have to get her a new nurse!” Matilda demanded, face wrinkled in disgust as they walked back to the car. Jennifer’s stomach was still rolling.  She had been so focused on keeping her morning sickness at bay, she almost missed what Matilda was rattling on about.

 

“What? Why? You think Hortensia will be too much for her?”

 

“No, mom! Weren’t you paying attention? That nurse was lying to you! Hortensia said no one had been in to check on her for hours!” Jennifer laughed. Since when did Matilda ever jump to Hortensia’s defense? One of her favorite hobbies was hiding in the hallway while Jennifer was scolding Hortensia in the kitchen. 

 

“Matilda, honey, you know Tens likes to embellish the details. There’s no way they went hours without checking on her. She even said she offered Hortensia a bedpan and Hortensia refused.”

 

“Ugh, mom, no, you weren’t paying attention!”

 

“Paying attention to what?” Jennifer asked, irritated. She had already been sick, had to apologize once again for Hortensia’s bizarre behavior- oh the poor woman was covered in it- and now Matilda was calling her dumb for something no one with an IQ under 200 would understand. She wasn’t in the mood. 

 

“Her call light was on!” 

 

“Okay?”

 

“The nurse said she never called, but her light was on the entire time we were in there.” Jennifer hadn’t heard this. Must have been when the baby decided it didn’t want breakfast afterall.

 

“Probably had been busy with another patient. Emergencies come up in hospitals all the time. Or who knows, Tens could have pressed it when it was too late. It doesn’t matter. C’mon, you’ll be late for school and your teacher’s in a bad mood.”

 

“Mom, she’s lying! It had been way longer than twenty minutes!” Matilda’s excited voice made her head ring and her nausea return. She wanted to get to the school just so she could sit down and put her head on her cool desk in the dark. Her head was pounding.

 

“So it was longer than twenty minutes, let's say it was an hour. Even so, not unusual.” She unlocked the car and opened the drivers side before reaching over and letting Matilda in.

 

“Ugh! Mom! Listen to me!”

 

“Matilda, what? What do you want me to do?” 

 

“Some of it was dry!” Matilda exclaimed. “I saw it on her legs and the bed.” 

 

“Matilda, please, I don’t feel well, what are you trying to say?” She asked, resting her head against the steering wheel.

 

“She had multiple accidents at different times. No one checked on her long enough for her to poop herself, have it dry, and poop herself again.” 

 

“Her stomach's upset. No one’s arguing that.” Jennifer said before starting the engine. “Remember when you were sick, you couldn’t go an hour without running for the loo, and sometimes you’d leave only to run back in a couple minutes later and the-” but she stopped at the worried look on Matilda’s face. 

 

“I think there's something wrong.” Matilda said. “What if this is God's Punishment?” Jennifer blinked. Matilda was getting so worked up she was crying. What on earth was this child going on about? Please tell her the religious nuts next door didn’t get to her too. Jennifer sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose.

 

“What do I need to do?” Jennifer asked in defeat. She turned the engine off and stared at her. If Matilda said something was up, then something was up. “Calmly,” Jennifer said, emphasizing calmly, "tell me what’s worrying you.”  

 

“I’m worried someone from the church is making Hortensia sick.” 

 

“What? Why?” How did she jump from A to Q? At worst, all Jennifer could see out of this was Hortensia pissed off the nurse and the nurse let her stew for a bit over it. A little too Agatha for her taste, but she knew how the preteen could be. But being cruel to an obnoxious kid didn’t equal attempted murder. 

 

“Oh, honey, she has an upset tummy because of the medicine she’s on, no one’s making her sick.” Matilda didn’t look convinced. 

 

“But those scriptures they left at the door. And the scripture in the card, and now this?” Matilda asked, her voice growing more and more panicky. Jennifer felt her irritation level rise another notch. Not at Matilda. Or Hortensia (although she was still on her list. She would ALWAYS be on her list) but at the people across the street. They had scared her daughter! She hadn’t realized this had upset Matilda, but clearly it had!

 

“Matilda,” she said much more gently this time. “They were just trying to bully us into taking the plea deal.”

 

“And you didn’t, so now they're punishing her.” Her heart hurt.

 

“Sweetheart, Hortensia is safe. I’m safe. You are safe. These two things have nothing to do with each other, I promise.”

 

“B-b-ut- why would sh-she be atta-attacking someone who w-was trying to he-help her?” Her heart cinched tighter.

 

“Matilda, Hortensia isn’t well. She hasn’t been well for some time.” She said softly. And maybe seeing a fecal coated raging Hortensia had been too much for Matilda to handle and that’s what’s truly at play. “But she’s getting the help she needs now. When the doctors stabilize her blood sugar, she’ll be going to a more long term treatment facility.” 

 

“You’re sending her away?” Matilda demanded, crying anew. Jennifer cringed.

 

“Temporarily, love, just temporary. The longest she can stay here is a week, but she needs more intensive treatment. There’s an inpatient center, Victory Heights, just a few blocks away that’s agreed to treat her once her diabetes is more controlled. And the good news is they can teach her how to manage it.” Matilda was staring at her with hurt eyes. “I don’t want to, Matilda, don’t look at me like that. We’re only talking a month, it’s not forever. She. Needs. Help. And, as her acting guardian, I have to make tough choices for her on her behalf.” She whispered the last part. “ It would be irresponsible of me not to at this point.” 

 

“I guess.” Matilda said sadly. 

 

“Did seeing her like that freak you out?” Matilda nodded. “I promise, she’ll be okay. Would it make you feel better if I came back during lunch and asked around?” She nodded again. “Alright, I’ll do that.” She pulled out of the stall and started heading towards the school.  

 

“Why do the people from her church think she’s lying? Didn’t they literally catch him with drugs?”

 

“You know she likes to make up stories sometimes.” All the time. “Well, someone close to her took advantage of that fact to prey on her, and then told them all to believe him and not her.” 

 

“But, but that’s stupid, if they just looked at all the evidence they’d see it was true. Why would anyone take his side?” 

 

“Because some people would rather blindly follow instead of thinking for themselves, but I imagine it’s hard to accept someone you trusted to be a monster. ” Her monster had always been in front of her. She had always known who the enemy was. But this monster had been lurking in the shadows. 

 

Pressure to drop coming from up top. Keep Fighting. 

 

 

Was maybe still lurking in the shadows. 

 

“You know what.” Jennifer said. Her mind was abuzz. “I think as soon as I get you settled in for the morning, I’m going to go back and spend some time with her.” 

 

“Thank you.” Matilda said with a sniffle. 

 

 When they got to the school, and walked through the office doors, Jennifer was struck by the sudden silence. She eyed everyone sitting at their desks, pointedly ignoring her with suspicion. Something was up. She walked Matilda to her office, and sure enough, no more than two minutes after she sat down there was a knock on her door.

 

“Come in.” Jennifer called. The door opened and a head of black curly hair appeared. Naomi Stephens looking…solemn? Her stomach clenched. She had never seen her without her trademark grin and shining eyes dying to spill the latest gossip. “What? What is it?” Naomi's eyes scanned the room before entering.

 

“Is Hortensia here?” 

 

“No.” Jennifer said, confused. “She’s ill. She’s in the hospital.” Naomi bit her lip. “What’s wrong?” She was hesitant at first. Naomi never hesitated to spill what she knew. It filled Jennifer with a sense of dread. Oh god, did someone die? Some of the teachers were getting up there. Like Mrs. Philips, surviving on what Jennifer could only assume was a mixture of spite and children’s tears. 

 

“You got a message from the prison.” Naomi said softly. No. No. No. No. They didn’t. They wouldn’t! 

 

“They let him out, didn’t they?” Just the thought made her sick. But Naomi shook her head. Jennifer’s stomach settled. 

 

“Hortensia’s mom passed away.” Jennifer stared up at her, her mind had gone blank. She couldn’t process what she was hearing. Naomi was waiting for her to say something.

 

“Thank you for telling me.” Jennifer said in a robotic voice. 

 

“Said she hung herself in her cell last night.” 

 

 She waited until the door closed again before she put her head on her desk and shut her eyes. A wave of anger and second hand grief washed over her. How could she do this to Hortensia after everything she was going through? How could Jennifer tell her? She was already so fragile right now, news like this…it would break her. 

 

“I think you should call the prison.” Matilda said. Jennifer lifted her head off her desk and stared blankly at her daughter. “Before you say anything to Hortensia.” Yes. That was smart. She should hear it directly from them first. 

 

“What’s the number?” Jennifer asked with a sniffle. Matilda recited it from memory. She called and spoke to someone from information. Jennifer’s eyes went wide. 

 

“It doesn’t appear there was a death here recently.” the woman on the other end said. Her voice rattled as she spoke, and she punctuated every other sentence with a hacking cough like she had spent the last twenty years chain smoking, but to Jennifer it sounded like the voice of an angel. “I’ll double check with the guards. What’s the prisoners I.D. number?” Jennifer repeated the question to Matilda, who told her. She was placed on hold for ten minutes and when the voice returned, she told her Eve was alive and well. Jennifer thanked her profusely before hanging up. She sighed in relief and looked up at Matilda.

 

“Eve’s fine!” Jennifer exclaimed. Matilda beamed. “How’d you know?” Matilda shrugged.

 

“It sounded weird that they’d leave something so personal in a message and not talk to you directly.” Jennifer frowned and stood up. 

 

“I thought something was off when we came in.”

 

“Yeah, I noticed too.” Matilda said. “So did they call the wrong person then? Did someone else die?”

 

“No.” Jennifer said. “No one had died.” 

 

“So it was a prank call? That’s not funny, that’s mean!” 

 

“I’m going to go get more details.” She started to leave when Matilda scrambled after her.

 

“I want to hear it too!” 

 

All eyes were on her as they stepped out into the main office as if trying to judge her mood. She had a sinking suspicion she had been the last to hear the news. She cleared her throat.

 

“False alarm.” She announced. “Hortensia’s mom is fine.” A few people cheered. One clapped. Everyone else went back to what they were doing, sensing the drama was over. But the drama was only just beginning. “Hey, Naomi?” 

 

“That’s wonderful news. You must be very relieved.” Her trademark grin was back, but there was something unspoken the way she had said it, as if implying “aren’t you so glad you aren’t stuck with her forever?” 

 

 

 

“Yes, I am. For Hortensia. I don’t know her mom that well. Did they happen to call and leave a message or did someone take it?” 

 

“They called and left a message on the answering machine. It was here when I came in this morning.”

 

“Can I listen to it?” Naomi handed her the phone receiver and hit play. Two call outs for children, one political recording asking to re-elect Thomas Williams for city council, and finally one strained man speaking as if trying to disguise his voice. It was obviously not from the prison. The language they used was all wrong and informal. Whenever she had spoken to the operators and guards at the prison, their speech was formal and professional. This was far from it. 

 

Jennifer placed the receiver back down harder than she meant to. 

 

“That wasn’t the prison.” Jennifer gritted her teeth. 

 

“Who was it?” 

 

“I don’t know.” Jennifer admitted with a frustrated sigh. She felt a pull on her sleeve. She turned to find Matilda trying to get her attention.  “Hmm?”

 

“You don’t think they’d try to call the hospital and talk to Tens directly?” 

 

“No one knows she’s there. It’s okay.” 

 

“But you told her class yesterday! And someone had written that verse in her card!” Matilda said. She was getting worked up again. “Someone could have told their parents. That wasn’t a prank! Someone wanted to hurt her! ” Jennifer wanted to tell her not to worry, that no one would stoop so low, but…she couldn’t. And the more she thought about it, the more plausible that, yes, someone did want to hurt her. To punish her. 

 

 

 

But when Jennifer called her hospital room, Hortensia didn’t pick up. One call. Two calls. Three calls. When the operator came on the line and suggested calling back at a later time, Jennifer hung up feeling frustrated. Hortensia was ignoring her. She glanced over at Matilda, who was staring at her with wide, pleading eyes, silently begging her to do something. 

 

Jennifer drummed her fingers against her desk in thought and stared at her daughter. 

 

“Do you know something?” Jennifer finally asked. She had thought Matilda had learned to tuck away this, what would you call it, extra sensory perception, but her near frantic state made her wonder. 

 

“She’s lost in the dark.” Jennifer didn’t know what that meant. Matilda had a far off look on her face, her eyes unfocused. Jennifer didn’t like it. She didn’t understand where Matilda went when her eyes glazed over. She didn’t understand why or how she could move things with her mind. She didn’t like not understanding. Matilda was an enigma, and despite having gotten rather used to things flying around the house untouched, it was this particular power that made Jennifer squirm. It felt invasive, and she knew it affected Matilda. How many overstimulated meltdowns had Matilda been through because she found herself in an emotionally charged situation? The answer was many. 

 

“It’s normal for children on the spectrum.” Dr. Renfield had said, and Jennifer agreed. To a point. But Matilda wasn’t just any kid on the spectrum. She knew in her gut this was not just the autism at play. It was not the autism that made her have telekinesis. Nor was it the reason she had a genius level IQ. Or the reason Matilda could sense things she couldn’t possibly know. It wasn’t clairvoyance, at least Jennifer didn’t think so, but it was…something. She was special. 

 

Had the temptation of seeing Hortensia in that state of delirium been too much for her to resist probing? Had she let this power back out of its cage. A power they had tried so hard to squash back in its box. And what did she mean she’s “lost in the dark?” 

 

“Whatever you’re doing, please stop.” Jennifer said. She bit her lip in worry to the point she began to taste copper in her mouth. She didn’t stop until Matilda’s eyes seemed to focus on her again. Jennifer let out a relieved sigh. It cost Matilda to use this power. She could see that. It was in the way her little shoulders seemed to slump forward, almost as if she would collapse onto her desk. It cost her energy at best. At worst…Jennifer didn’t want to think about it, but the fear dug into her. The fear of days, weeks, months shaved off Matilda’s life. She may be overreacting, sure, but it wasn’t a chance she was willing to take.

 

Even if it didn’t, even if Matilda bounced back like nothing had happened…there was evil at play. Hortensia had been exposed, Jennifer had been exposed, but she’d be damned if she’d let her daughter anywhere near it. Not her Matilda. Not her baby girl. No matter how grown up she acted, how mature, how intelligent, Matilda was still her baby. Jennifer stood and knelt in front of her. 

 

“Matilda,” Jennifer said, her tone serious and stern. “I know you want to understand what’s going on with your friend, but I’m telling you, stay out of this. I don’t want to catch you doing…whatever it is you’re doing again. I don’t want you exposed to this, not even for a second. Not a glimpse. Not a flash. Not an inkling. Do you understand?” 

 

Matilda looked away from her and gave a half-hearted agreement. 

 

“Promise me.”

 

“Fine.” Matilda grumbled. “Can we see her now?” 

 

“We?” Jennifer asked. Oh no. “You’re staying here.”

 

“What? No! That’s not fair!” 

 

“I’m only going to be gone for an hour at most, besides, you literally just saw her. If you want to see her, we can visit again after school.” Matilda gave her puppy dog eyes. “No, absolutely not. I’m putting my foot down. You need to stay. I mean it.” The girl's face seemed to crumple. Jennifer rubbed at her temples. “You just saw her! Why do you want to go back already?” Matilda shrugged.

 

“A feeling.” Her eyes were wide, pleading. So much for sticking to her guns Jennifer thought. One day she’d develop a backbone. Today was not that day. 

 

 

“Fine.” Jennifer said in defeat. Matilda beamed and jumped to her feet. 

 

 

The girl was suddenly ecstatic, talking Jennifer’s ear off the entire way there. It was almost as if it had been years since Matilda had last seen her, rather than an hour. She wanted to tell her about the stick bug she had seen, about the movie preview she thought Hortensia might like, about the abhorrent food in the cafeteria she was missing out on. But as they stepped out of the hospital elevator onto the fourth floor, she had grown solemn and quiet. At first, Jennifer had assumed it was out of respect for her surroundings, but when she grabbed her hand to pull her along, she found it had grown cold and clammy. Jennifer stopped walked and stared at her.

 

“Are you alright?” she asked. Matilda’s demeanor had changed so drastically it was unnerving. Now she seemed almost timid and fearful. Gone was the excitement, and in its place was…what exactly? She studied Matilda’s face. Jennifer’s stomach clenched. She saw the fear etched in the girls features. Her eyes had gone wide. “Matilda?” But the girl said nothing, only continued to remain frozen in place, staring at something. No, not something. Someone. Jennifer followed her gaze to a gray haired man strolling down the hallway towards them. He was smartly dressed, in a blue suit. He nodded absently at them as he passed. Matilda was crushing her hand. Jennifer stared at her in shock. “Matilda?” she whispered. A dark stain had begun to appear on the front of her pants and trickled down a leg. And then she began to scream. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Brown Owl]

Great work as always but can we have a cute and fluffy chapter, no horror just fluff sometime soon

[CDfm]

Wow!  
The entire time I was reading this and actually even still I have a horrible feeling in my stomach and the hair on the back of my neck is standing up.  If I were approaching someone while and felt this way I would have the hood on my holster off and my hand on my weapon.  
Matilda showed us some new powers that are pretty impressive.  I think it would be very wise to listen to what that little girl has to say.  Now following this chapter I feel even stronger that Matilda should cause an accidental fire or two in that church.  She might even send a message indicating that those accidents could happen just about anywhere and the nonsense needs to stop immediately or there will definitely be more of them. 
You also know that leaving us hanging that way is definitely a very cruel thing to do.  You now need to get another chapter out ASAP. 

[AdultInnocence]

Just read the last few chapters and damn. There is a lot at play here and I have no idea what exactly is going on, but someone is trying to cover it up.

 

[CDfm]

I hope everything is okay.  It’s been a couple of weeks since an update.  I am starting to get concerned.  I hope it’s nothing more than just some writers block or something. 

[SashaButters]

On 6/9/2024 at 5:13 PM, CDfm said:

I hope everything is okay.  It’s been a couple of weeks since an update.  I am starting to get concerned.  I hope it’s nothing more than just some writers block or something. 

Sorry, I know it’s slow going right now 🥲between driving across country and no space to write. Right now I’m living out of a crack motel on an air mattress with my parents. 🙃 I need to go find a library somewhere.

[CDfm]

Honestly I am just glad to hear that you are okay.  Sure I would love to see more of the story but I am fine waiting for a time when it’s good for you to write some more.  

[Brown Owl]

8 hours ago, SashaButters said:

Sorry, I know it’s slow going right now 🥲between driving across country and no space to write. Right now I’m living out of a crack motel on an air mattress with my parents. 🙃 I need to go find a library somewhere.

Seen any elephants lately ;).. Seriously though glad to see your ok

[Mazamune]

It's good to read you.

Seems like you need to take a breath as much as Jenny does.

I hope it's get better for you soon, for Jenny you will have to tell us 😁.

Cheers!

[SashaButters]

A/n: All moved in! A.K.A a mattress on the floor and an internet connection! But I have my own room now! Which means I'm back! Thank you for your patience!

 

Jennifer stood frozen in place as Matilda’s screams began to echo through the halls. No. Not here. Not now. Heads were turning to look at them, some curious, some disgusted. She needed to get Matilda out of here before things began to start flying. It was only a matter of time before they did. Things always flew when Matilda had a meltdown. She was like a nuclear reactor ready to blow and this place was about to get caught in the imminent explosion. She tried to pull Matilda’s hand and usher her back the way they had come, but Matilda was dead weight. And then, just as suddenly as it had started, Matilda went quiet. She was ghost white, the color of lilies. The color of death. 

 

“Matilda?” Jennifer asked. “What’s the matter?” But before Jennifer could get an answer from her, Matilda had taken off at a full sprint down the hallway. “MATILDA!” Ignoring the nurse who chastised her for running in the building, Jennifer took off after her, frantically calling her name. She turned the corner and saw a flash of her daughter’s blue coat entering Hortensia’s hospital room. Jennifer slowed to walk as she entered, afraid of what she might find. 

 

Her heart seemed to drop into her stomach. Hortensia was lying in the bed, eyes closed, unmoving. Dead… But then common sense seemed to return to her. Hortensia was only sleeping. She watched her chest rise and fall with even deep breaths. Matilda was trying to pull herself up onto the bed.

 

“Matilda!” Jennifer hissed. “Stop it, you’ll wake her up!” But Matilda ignored her and continued to claw her way up until they were lying side by side. She roughly threw her arms around Hortensia, nearly knocking the wind out of her. Hortensia opened her eyes. They were red, puffy and swollen. Hortensia stared at her blankly, a look of deep sorrow on her face.

 

“You’re back.” A voice behind her said. Jennifer turned to find a different nurse from before standing in the doorway. Her voice dropped into a soft whisper. “You must have heard.” No. They really had gotten to her first.

 

“Tens,” Jennifer said, coming to her bedside. “Tens, it’s okay. It’s a lie. I spoke to the guards this morning. Your mom is alive! She’s fine. It was a lie.” But nothing she said seemed to register on her face. Her arms wrapped around Matilda, and she buried her face into the crook of her neck and…went back to sleep? 

 

“We gave her something to help calm her down.” The nurse explained. “A larger dose. She’ll be sleeping it off for a while.” 

 

 The same nurse as earlier in the morning entered the room and frowned. “Hey, you can’t be up there! Get down!” Matilda ignored her, tightening her grip around Hortensia.

 

“Let her be.” The other nurse said before turning her attention back to Jennifer. “We were bathing her, and then halfway through, she just started screaming.” Jennifer frowned. 

 

“Not like before.” The nurse with the Irish accent said before Jennifer could respond. “You would have thought we were torturing the lass. Crying so hard she threw up on herself. ” 

 

“Wait, so, this wasn’t about her mom?” Jennifer asked. “No one called her, no one came in?”

 

“Not that I know of. I mean, it certainly sounded like she thought someone died, but one moment she was fine, and the next…”

 

“Did she say what was wrong?”

 

“She was babbling something, but neither of us could get a straight answer. The doctor wants to run some tests and make sure it wasn’t some kind of seizure.” 

 

“I’m clocking off for the night. This is Susan, she’ll be taking over for the day shift. If you have any further concerns…”The red headed nurse said. 

 

“I have a question.” They all turned to stare at Matilda. “Her call lights on. I’ve pressed the button, but it doesn’t turn off.” Jennifer craned her neck and peered at the top corner of the doorway. 

 

“Oh, yeah, it’s been broken for ages.” Susan said. “Can’t get anyone to pay to fix it.” 

 

“Well, what if she needs something?” Matilda asked. 

 

“We poke our head into this room every fifteen minutes.” 

 

Matilda’s eyes locked with Jennifer’s and her eyebrows rose as if to say, “what are you going to do about it?” 

 

“You said this morning she never called for a bedpan. How would you know if the call light doesn’t work?” The red headed nurse opened her mouth to rebut, but Jennifer went on. She was angry now. “You said you check on her every fifteen minutes, but some of the mess had already hardened.” 

 

“I didn’t notice she had soiled herself until-”

 

“How could you not smell it? I smelled it getting off the elevator!” 

 

“Well, when you’re around it all the time-” Jennifer gritted her teeth. Matilda had been right. Again. And now she was making excuses. 

 

“You go to that church, don’t you?” 

 

“I don’t see what that has to do with anything.” 

“You’re giving her subpar care because you think she’s lying, but this girl has been through hell! And all you lot just keep kicking her while she’s down. IF YOU WANT TO BLOODY GO AFTER SOMEONE, GO AFTER ME! I’M THE FUCKING ADULT! I’M THE ONE PRESSING CHARGES! ME! GO AFTER ME, NOT AN ELEVEN YEAR OLD GIRL!” Jennifer screamed. She had backed the nurse into a corner. 

 

“Ma’am, I’m going to need you to calm down, or I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” There was someone new standing in the doorway. Security was here. Jennifer took a deep heaving breath and gave one final glare.

 

“And fix the damn light or move her into another room! And if I ever catch you, or any of you religious freaks causing problems for my daughter again so help me…”

 

“She’s not your daughter.” She muttered under her breath. 

 

“She may as well be!”  Jennifer snapped before watching her go. She stood rooted to the spot until they all left. “Wait, please, not you!” Jennifer called the other nurse. The woman in brown scrubs stared at her uncertainly for a moment. “Can you tell me a little bit more about what happened earlier?” 

 

“Not much to tell. She was covered in poo. Leslie, my co-worker, said she needed help. She,” Susan said, gesturing towards the bed with her head, “wasn’t saying anything, just sort of kept her head down. I think she was embarrassed. Then she just sort of snapped halfway through getting wiped down.” 

 

“Did someone say something to her? Was she fighting? Did she see someone? Hear something?”

 

“I don’t know. I didn’t see or hear anything out of the ordinary. The telly was on, but that’s it. Nothing I can imagine causing that kind of reaction.”

 

“What was she watching?”

 

“I wasn’t paying attention, but there aren’t many options. Nothing but soap operas and infomercials about diet pills and campaign ads. I’ll be glad when this election is over, the commercials are annoying and i’m tired of seeing those signs on every street corner. Now they’re even here passing out pamphlets with all their fake promises for better hospital funding.” Susan rolled her eyes. “This place is falling apart. If he wanted my vote he had the last two years to earn it. We can’t even get a busted call light fixed.” Jennifer wasn’t interested in her complaints. She wanted to know what had happened to Hortensia, not the hospital's excuses for ignoring their patients. She followed Susan’s eyes to the bed. Hortensia was sitting up now, more alert. She was staring at Matilda as if wondering when she had gotten there.

 

“Hey, you’re awake.” Jennifer said softly coming to her side. She let out an unintelligible string of words. Her eyelids looked heavy and it appeared as if it was taking all her will power to hold them open. 

 

“We just came back.” Matilda mumbled into her shoulder. Hortensia let out a soft grunt of acknowledgement and settled back down.

 

“Go back to sleep, honey, you look exhausted.” Jennifer said, waving a hand through Hortensia’s hair. “Matilda, if I run down to my car and get you some clean pants, can I trust you’ll stay put?” Matilda nodded, eyes still shut. It didn’t look like Jennifer could pry her away even if she wanted to. “I’ll be right back.” But before she left, she dug in the bag she had brought earlier and pulled something out. “Here, Tens, I have something for you.” She manually lifted the girl's arm and tucked the stuffed dog she had stayed up late putting back together. She had debated over fixing it or throwing it out, but the look of pure joy on the girls’ face confirmed she had made the right choice. 

 

Jennifer took a step back and stared at them a moment, taking in the sight of the two of them, arms wrapped around each other in a tight embrace. She wished she could join them, an arm around each of them, and a baby sleeping curled on her chest. 

 

Once she stepped out of the elevator doors, she couldn’t help but notice a flash of red curls standing by the automatic door talking excitedly to someone. Jennifer swallowed. It was the man from earlier. The one with the salt-and-pepper hair and blue suit. Now that she got a good look at him, he seemed familiar somehow. Their eyes locked for a split second as Jennifer passed. Their conversation stopped abruptly. 

 

She stepped outside and immediately zipped up her coat. Her breath came out in a visible white cloud. She hurried to her car and dug through the boot. Matilda had leggings in here somewhere.  She pushed aside grocery bags, empty cups, trash, library books and- aha! She wouldn’t match, but at least they were dry. She doubted Hortensia would appreciate knowing Matilda was cuddling up with her in her current state. She grabbed the leggings and a plastic bag for her wet things. She closed the lid, turned and let out a small yelp. 

 

“Hello, excuse me.” A man was standing behind her wearing black slacks, and a collared blue shirt. He smiled at her and held out his hand. “Jim Gladberry, I work for the legal team of Mr. Thomas Williams, city councilman.” He said, introducing himself. She shook his hand, trying not to wince at the excessive force he put into the shake. She let go and flexed her hand. 

 

“Oh, um, hello.” She said.

 

“I hope we can count on your vote this election.” He handed her a flier with the city councilman's face on it, despite there already being one tucked underneath her windshield wiper. 

 

“I-i’ll think about it.” Jennifer stammered. She tried to walk away but he stopped her.

 

“What can I do to make that answer a ‘yes?’” He asked. She thought of what Susan had said.

 

“I’ve noticed this place is falling into a bit of dis-repair.” In fact, most of the town had been lacking in routine maintenance. She had heard complaints of buses breaking down, the library was crumbling, the park was trashed. Graffiti was being ignored. Funding for the schools had been cut. She had lived here all her life and it had never been so bad. “This is our town's only hospital, and it does concern me. My daughter's call light is broken. She has diabetes and I don’t like that she can’t page anyone.” One of the two elevators was down as well. “Also, I’m pregnant and seeing the shape of this place makes me a little nervous.” His deep frown brightened. 

 

“Congratulations, I love kids. Children are the future, In fact…” She smiled politely and let him go into his spiel. It sounded generic and rehearsed. She wasn’t impressed. 

 

“That’s good to hear.” His speech had nothing to do with fixing the hospital. “If you’ll excuse me…”

 

“You’re Jennifer Honey, correct?” She froze. “Headmistress of Crunchem Hall.” He said less like a question and more like a statement. 

 

“I am… How do y-” But before she could finish her question he had started to go on another pre-rehearsed speech. 

 

“Sir, please, I need to get back to my daughter.” 

 

“Ms. Honey,  a moment of your time.” He stepped in front of her. “Speaking on behalf of Thomas Williams I must insist we speak for a brief moment. Then you can go back to your daughter, Matilda.”

 

Jennifer froze. She didn’t like how he knew her name. Why did he know so much about her? 

 

“Wh-what do we need to speak about?” She asked slowly. But she knew. 

 

“This whole business with the kid, Susanah, Machenzie, what was her name again?”

 

“Hortensia.” Jennifer said through gritted teeth.

 

“Yeah, her, look, it’s terrible what’s happened to her, really, but from what my sources tell me, she’s not the most trustworthy eyewitness.”

 

“What?” 

 

“I’m not saying nothing happened, I’m merely speculating the possibility it may not have happened the way she says it did. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

 

“No.” Jennifer said, “I don’t understand. I don’t understand why the lawyer of the city councilman is here about Hortensia’s case. It has nothing to do with him.”

 

“It does though.” He said with a grimace. “It’s about the timing. We’re in the middle of his re-election campaign. You see, this is drawing bad publicity for him. A bad scandal like this in the church.” He reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a pack of fags. He offered one to her but she declined. She shifted awkwardly from foot to foot as he took a long drag. “You’re free to press charges after, what’s one more month, but honestly, do you really want her going through the stress of a trial?” Jennifer’s lip curled into a snarl, but he ignored her. “You should either take the deal, or postpone it.”

 

“No.” Jennifer said, before pushing past him. 

 

“It’s really in your best interest. Don’t you care about the town? What do you think this kind of publicity is going to do to the real estate market?” Jennifer gritted her teeth and pressed forward. 

…

 

Jennifer stood in the kitchen holding a mug of tea and stared at the calendar. A kind of nervous excitement flooded through her. Tomorrow. Tomorrow she’d get to meet her baby. She placed a hand on her belly. She knew it was way too early to feel movement, but still she held her hand in place hoping to feel some kind of stirring. Nothing. Too early. 

 

She turned to find Matilda staring at her, a kind of sad look on her face. She hadn’t been the same since the other day. A cloud of despair seemed to hang over her. Even now she looked like she would burst into tears at any moment. 

 

“What?” But Matilda only shook her head. “You know you really scared me the other day.” Those large brown eyes were boring into her. “Were you doing that thing?” Matilda hesitated a moment before nodding. Jennifer pulled up a chair at the kitchen table across from her. “You know how I feel about you probing.”

 

“Feeling.” Matilda corrected before lowering her head and mumbling. “I call it feeling.” 

 

“Well, you need to stop feeling. It does something to you.” Matilda didn’t protest. When she had returned to Hortensia’s hospital room, she had found Hortensia in a panic. Matilda had gone unconscious. Her eyes had been rolled into the back of her head with a trail of blood oozing from her nose. 

 

“I feel better.” Matilda offered lamely. Jennifer sighed.

 

“What were you even doing?” The girl bit her lip and looked at her uncertainty. “Matilda?”

 

“I think I know who hurt her.” Matilda whispered before her face fell. “She made me promise not to say it though.” 

 

“Who? Who made you promise? Hortensia?” Matilda nodded. Jennifer ran a hand down her face in thought. “So she remembers?” Matilda nodded. “Who?”

 

“I can’t say.” Matilda said, a pained look on her face. “She’s scared. Terrified.” 

 

Jennifer wasn’t sure what to feel. She wanted Hortensia to finally open up, but not to her six-year-old daughter! Of all the people, why her? 

 

“I told her to talk to you, if that helps.” Matilda said. “I don’t know if she will though. She thinks you won’t believe her.”

 

 “Why did she tell you?” Jennifer groaned into her hands. “She knows I don’t want you involved. You’re too young.”

 

“She didn’t. I figured it out myself.” A dark look seemed to cross over Matilda’s face. “I wasn’t trying to pry, It was just so overwhelming. So horrible. I just wanted to help her. It was all over her wiggling all around. I tried to reach in and pull it out.” She hugged herself as her eyes finally spilled over with tears. Jennifer’s eyebrows knitted together. But Matilda shook her head again in a dismissive gesture before Jennifer could get a word out. 

 

“I don’t understand.” Things wiggling about? Was she talking figuratively or literally? It was hard to tell sometimes with her. She saw the world so differently. And what did she mean by ‘reaching in and pulling it out?’ “Matilda. I need you to understand something. No. Secrets. I know you want to be a good friend, sister, whatever you two are to each other, but you need to tell me what you know. Do you understand? This is too important.” Matilda bit her lip and averted her eyes. “Matilda?”

 

“I don’t know for sure! It’s just a guess!” Matilda said, backtracking. 

 

“Matilda!” The girl let out a pained sigh and looked up at her with a grimace.

 

“I think there’s more than one person.” Jennifer’s mouth went dry. She could see Matilda’s mouth moving, but her words went in one ear and out the other. 

 

“W-who?” 

 

Matilda repeated the name. Jennifer sat at the table as still as a statue for some time. 

 

“Mom?” Matilda asked. But Jennifer’s mouth refused to work. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, she slowly got to her feet.

 

“I…I’m going to go for a walk.” Jennifer mumbled. Her legs trembled as she headed for the front door. Forgoing her usual warning of “don’t use the stove” she walked out the door and to the sidewalk. At first, she walked down the street to clear her head. When that didn’t work, she went around the block. When that still didn’t calm her racing thoughts, she found herself on auto-pilot walking the two miles towards the hospital. She needed to hear it from the source. 

 

“Is it true?” Jennifer asked the moment their eyes met. Hortensia sat up in her hospital bed surprised to see her, before her face took on a color as if she was going to be sick. “Do you remember now?” 

 

“I don’t want to-”

 

“Do. You. Remember?” Jennifer demanded. Hortensia shrank back, but gave her head a small almost imperceptible nod. 

 

“I-I dreamed it.” Hortensia said weakly. “It’s not real!” But her face crumbled and she began to sob. “It didn’t happen! It didn’t happen! I lied! I lied about everything! It didn’t happen!” She chanted over and over, as if saying it would make it so. 

 

“How could you have lied if you never said anything?” Jennifer whispered. She came over and sat on the edge of Hortensia’s bed before putting a leg up and lying in the few inches of space available. Hortensia buried her face in the crook of Jennifer’s arm as Jennifer held her. 

 

“Tell them I lied! Make it stop!” Hortensia wailed. 

 

“Make what stop?” 

 

“Everything! My mom! The kids at school! The messages! The phone calls! I want to go home!” 

 

“What phone calls?” Jennifer asked. But Hortensia either wouldn’t or couldn’t explain. It hadn’t taken Jennifer long to get an answer in the form of a ringing coming from her left. Jennifer groped her hand over for the receiver before Hortensia could stop her, only to get an earful of the most vile and disgusting thing she had ever heard. It was the same mechanically disguised voice from this morning, but instead of telling her her mother was dead, it was… Jennifer pulled the cord out of the wall. “How long has this been going on for?” 

 

Hortensia didn’t answer, only cried. 

 

“How long have you known? Have you always known?” She saw the yellow blob of hair buried in her arm shake from side to side. “Firstly,” she pulled on the girl, gesturing for her to come forward and out of her armpit. “I walked here, I don’t think you want to put your face there.” Hortensia let her guide her up until she was resting against her chest. Jennifer slung her arm around her shoulder and held her tightly against herself, periodically rocking her from side to side.

 

“Would you tell me what you remember?” She didn’t think she would, but after a minute, Hortensia spoke, slowly at first, and barely above a whisper. 

 

“My youth group was having an overnight sleepover party at the church as a last hurrah before school started. It was right after Cynthia kidnapped me and made me live with them.” Her voice was flat, monotone, and she spoke as if she was trying to remove herself from the memory. Jennifer held her breath, afraid to make a sound and disrupt her. This was the first time she was acknowledging any of it. It was progress. 

 

“I said I wanted to go, but Cynthia said I was grounded. We got into a huge fight.”

 

“Like ours?” Jennifer asked. She let out a pretend giggle, trying to keep her voice as calm and neutral as possible. Trying to make her feel relaxed, like this was just another conversation. 

 

“Worse. Way worse.” Hortensia said softly. “Our fights are nothing, like, like we’re sisters or something.”  Jennifer lightly rubbed the girl's arm as she spoke.

 

“That bad?” 

 

“Yeah, so I was, y’know, having one of those hulk moments. I was mad they were making me move, and then I was pissed about the camp, and then Cynthia told me to stop throwing a temper tantrum because I wasn’t getting what I wanted…” 

 

“It was the last straw?”

 

“Yeah.” 

 

“So then what happened?” Jennifer whispered like they were two conspiring children. She craned her neck so that her head was resting atop Hortensia’s.

 

“Aiden called Pastor Chris because I was scaring him and wanted to know what to do.” Jennifer wanted to roll her eyes at the thought of that giant being afraid of a little pre-teen girl, but that wasn’t fair. There was lots to be afraid of. Hortensia could hurt herself. Hurt someone else. They had another child. He was built like a tank, but still. 

 

“He told Aiden to put him on speaker and he talked to all of us. He- he was on m-my side! He t-told Cynthia she was being unreasonable and I was going through a lot and needed fun! “ She was really mad, but Aiden said I could go.” 

 

Jennifer’s heart tightened. 

“I remember he pulled me aside during the party and told me if I ever needed to get away, to call him. He leaned in and whispered, ‘I know what a bitch my brother married.’ I was so surprised to hear him say that. I thought it was really funny, cause he’s the youth pastor.”

 

“He was being extra friendly to you.” Jennifer whispered. 

 

 “I didn’t know!” Hortensia sobbed. “I didn’t know that’s what had happened!”

 

“Shh, of course you didn’t. It’s not your fault.” 

 

“When everyone went to sleep, I got up to go to the loo. He saw I was up and asked me to come into his office and talk. He asked me normal stuff. How home life was. School, things like that. He told me I was really strong to go through so much.”

 

“You are very strong and very brave…” Jennifer whispered. She felt sick. 

 

“He said I wasn’t like the other kids with their childish lives. I was much more mature since I had all these adult sized life experiences.” 

 

“Oh, honey…” 

 

 “Since I was so adult, he’d let me try the communion wine. ‘Just a sip’, he said, but he didn’t take the bottle back and I snuck a few more while we talked. And then I woke up on the couch. I felt like shit. I had wee’d on myself. He told me it was because I had gotten greedy and drank more than I was offered and passed out drunk, but since I was going through so much, he’d let it slide. He said he wouldn’t tell anyone and asked me not to either since ‘my greediness would get him in trouble.” 

 

Jennifer hugged her tighter. 

 

“It’s not your fault.” she whispered. “He preyed on you.” 

 

“But I kept doing it!” Hortensia cried. “I’m so stupid! I really didn’t know! I thought he was just being cool and letting me get drunk in his office during church.” 

 

“It’s still not your fault.” Jennifer whispered.

 

“I thought it was our secret. Our game.” 

 

“It’s not your fault.” 

 

“And then I started hanging out with Bruce and he told me a story about why he stopped going to youth group.” Jennifer shut her eyes. “He said he started being nice to him since he didn’t have any friends. Told me he offered him a sip of the wine. He only had the one and he said it just kind of made him sleepy, but when Pastor Chris started taking pictures, he got up and left.” Hortensia was silent for a moment as Jennifer waved her hand up and down her back. “I was angry at him, Bruce I mean. Pastor Chris was…he was my friend… he wouldn’t do something like that.” 

 

“We-were you hurting…anywhere?” 

 

“Sometimes I’d get sick afterwards. Hungover. I thought it was from that.” 

 

“Honey, with those injuries…”

 

“I had this vague fuzzy memory, like I wasn’t sure it was real or a dream. ” Hortensia said softly. “There was someone else there.” Jennifer noticed the past tense. Wasn’t sure. 

 

“And now you’re sure?” Hortensia nodded. 

 

“I woke up in the middle. There were two of them.” Hortensia whispered. “It was the second voice who...who…” she let out a choked whine and buried her head again. 

 

“Who was he, sweetheart?” 

 

“I can’t tell you! You wouldn’t believe me!” 

 

“I already know. I need to hear you say it.” 

 

“I can’t!” Hortensia cried. She was trembling now as if she felt an invisible arctic wind, but Jennifer doubted the chill in the air had anything to do with it. She suddenly propped up into her elbows and shouted towards the hallway. “I made it all up! No one hurt me! NO ONE HURT ME! I LIED!” before turning over with her back towards Jennifer as if to say ‘this conversations over’. “It’s what I’m su-su-supposed to say!” 

 

When it was clear Hortensia wasn’t going to say anything more on the subject, Jennifer gave her another squeeze and leaned over her. 

 

“You. Are. So. Brave.” Jennifer whispered. “I’m so proud of you.” 

 

“I’m not! I don’t want to be brave! I just want all of this to stop!” 

 

“Tens, you are!” She cuddled up against her and pulled her in tight. “Forget the who for a minute. You just took a huge first step and I’m so proud of you. Hey, hey, look at me. Roll over. C’mon.” Hortensia protested. Jennifer playfully shook her until she rolled back over. “It wasn’t your fault. None of this is your fault.” 

 

“If I hadn-”

“Shh, none of that. It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault.” Jennifer whispered over and over again. Hortensia’s body shook with sobs as Jennifer held her. Her eyes burned with tears of her own. 

 

A sudden knock on the door made both of them jump.

 

“I heard screaming. Is everything all right?” Susan asked. 

 

“Yes, sorry.” Jennifer said. Hortensia had already disentangled herself from Jennifer's arms and was lying on the other side of the bed as if she had just been caught being naughty. Sensing that the moment was over, Jennifer got up and sat on the plastic chair. 

 

Susan stared at her suspiciously for a moment before turning her attention back to Hortensia. “Do you need anything? How’s your nappy?” Hortensia seemed to stare at her bedding before mumbling incoherently into it. “C’mon, you were doing so well the last couple days. What do you need?” 

 

“A new one.” Hortensia mumbled again, but clearer this time.  

 

“Sorry, was I squeezing you too hard?” Jennifer asked playfully as the nurse began pulling supplies out of the cupboard. Hortensia shook her head, avoiding eye contact. “I’m only joking.” 

 

“Do you want to try going potty before I change you?” Susan asked. Hortensia shook her head. “How about we try?” Again, she shook her head. Susan let out an exasperated sigh. “You’ve been so well behaved these last couple days, don’t ruin it. Bedpan or commode?”

 

“I can leave, if that’ll help.” Jennifer offered. She got to her feet.

 

“Actually, I’m going to need your help, mom. Can you push it over here while I get her situated?” Jennifer looked in the direction she was gesturing and found a commode in the corner. She pushed it over as Susan ripped the soiled nappy off. “Bring it closer, so it’s up against the bed. Perfect.” With each of them supporting Hortensia under an arm, they guided her onto it. Jennifer gave her head an affectionate scratch before turning to leave. Susan pulled the curtain around them as Jennifer took a seat. Hortensia was still weak and unsteady, but there was still a noticeable difference of improvement. 

 

“How’s her sugar been?” Jennifer asked. 

 

“It’s getting there!” a voice said on the other side of the curtain. “We’re trying something different right now. Doctor thinks it’s stress that’s causing the wild swings, so we’re trying to keep her as calm and relaxed as possible.” Jennifer winced. And here she had come bringing up the most stressful thing possible. 

 

“I’m done.” Hortensia said.

 

“Did you poo?”

 

“No.” 

 

“I want you to try. That’s our deal. ” 

 

“I did.”

 

“Try harder. I can tell when you’re trying. You’re not trying.” There was a crude sound followed by a, “thank you.”  A few minutes later, they were helping her back into bed. 

 

“I need to get going, I left Matilda alone.” Jennifer whispered once they were alone again. She bent over and gave Hortensia’s forehead a kiss. “I’m so proud of you. You really are making great progress.” 

 

 “When do I get to come home?” Jennifer bit her lip.

 

“Soon.” she said. “Once your blood sugars back under control, you’ll have to go back upstairs and redo the assessment.” She had expected Hortensia to become angry, but she only shrugged. 

 

“Is Matilda okay?” 

 

“She’s…” Jennifer paused in thought. Something had happened to her and it had Jennifer’s stomach in knots. She had even misspelled a word on her paper. “She pushed her powers too far.”

 

“She did something to me.” Hortensia said, rubbing at her chest. 

 

“What happened?” 

 

“She said there were things crawling on me. She said she got a couple off, before…I wouldn’t have believed her, but I felt it. It was like I could breathe again.” Jennifer wondered if that had to do with Hortensia’s breakthrough. Either way, Matilda would not be doing it again. 

 

“She had some kind of fit right before we got to your room. Did she tell you about it?” Hortensia shook her head, but then stopped. 

 

“She was shaking.” Hortensia said. “It was hard to follow what happened. They gave me something, but she said… she saw a monster. Or maybe I dreamed that. I’m not sure.” 

 

Jennifer thought back to her unnatural, hair raising screams. She had certainly seen something. “Well she has an appointment for an MRI tomorrow morning.” Hortensia made a face. “She’s actually quite excited for it.”

“Go figure.” 

 

“And then I have an appointment for an ultrasound right after. I’m actually pretty excited for that too.” 

 

“Weirdo’s.” Hortensia said, but smiled. Her fingers drummed nervously against her tray as she glanced around the room. She picked up her sketch pad, hesitated for a moment before ripping a page out, before folding it up and handing it to her. Jennifer took it, curious. “Not here.” Hortensia said. Jennifer put it in her pocket, before giving her another hug.

 

“I love you, Tens.” 

 

“Love you, too.” Jennifer smiled as she headed back home. She had never said those words before. Lot’s of firsts today. She waited until she crossed the parking lot and fished the paper out of her pocket. Her hands shook as she examined the drawing of the man she had been seeing on every street corner. Thomas Williams. City Councilman.  She crumpled the drawing in her fist. She hadn’t recognised him in the hospital the other day, but it was the same man Matilda had seen. Her “monster.” The pressure to drop the case was coming from up top all right. 

 

“I believe you.” Jennifer whispered.

 

[CDfm]

Wow!!   No WOW!!!!!!!

Reading this I really figured we wouldn’t be getting a name of the second person.  At the same time I was wondering if the second person could possibly be the politician. So I was shocked and not surprised at the same time.  Shocked that you didn’t leave us hanging but then not completely surprised that the politician was involved. One area we are left hanging on is just what did Matilda do? 
Absolutely loving the story. Was thrilled to see it updated again.  I am sorry you had such a bad trip.  I am glad you are getting an opportunity to get some form of normal back again. I will be looking forward to seeing more. 

[SashaButters]

“Tens! Tens! Wake up!” A voice shouted from somewhere far away.

 

“Matilda! Shh, we’re in the hospital.” Another voice chided. “Let her be, she’s sleeping. You can visit with her later.” Hortensia let out a small grunt to show she was awake. A cool gentle hand slowly ran through her hair. Fighting against the sleeping pills grasp, she managed to crack an eye open. “Hi, sweetheart, good morning. Sorry to wake you.” Hortensia rubbed at her face in an attempt to make the world come into focus and found Jenny standing over her, a gentle smile tugging at the corners of her lips. “There she is.” 

 

“I’m awake.” Hortensia managed to get out. She reached over and patted blindly at the edge of the bed.

 

“Here, do you want to sit up?” Jenny asked. She held the remote in her hands and soon the bed's motor began to whirl to life. “That’s better.” 

 

“Look, Tens!” An excited voice cried. Matilda stuck out her arm to show the bandage in the crease of her forearm. “We match!” Hortensia winced. 

 

“She had her brain scan this morning.” Jenny explained. 

 

“It was so cool! They put me in this massive white machine that went kachunk kachunk kachunk! And then they gave me an IV of this stuff and it made me all hot like I had a bad fever! It was so weird! I thought I was peeing myself!” 

 

Hortensia blinked. She was still too drugged to understand half of what she was being told. 

 

“You peed yourself? Then why do you sound so excited?” Hortensia mumbled.

 

“I didn’t pee myself!” Matilda said, sounding outraged. As if she hadn’t just done the very thing a few days ago. “I only felt like I was peeing myself.”

 

“They gave her contrast. It raises your body temperature to help them take better pictures.” Jenny explained. Hortensia felt like even if they read her See Spot Run she still wouldn’t understand what was being said. 

 

“Sorry,” Hortensia mumbled. “I’m a little out of it.” Jenny gave her a sympathetic smile.

 

“I heard you had a rough night.” 

 

“I guess.”  She didn’t want to talk about it.

 

“What happened?” Matilda asked. What had happened was when they had woken her up for a blood draw in the middle of the night, Hortensia had lost her shit and needed to be sedated. She had been so sure he was coming to kill her. She had said too much last night and now she needed to be silenced. 

 

“Nurse scared me.” Hortensia said softly. She reached over for Spot and hugged him tight against her chest. 

 

“What’s this?” Matilda asked. She was holding what looked like a Chinese Raggedy Ann knockoff. 

 

“A doctor gave him to me yesterday.” She held out her hand and Matilda handed it over. Hortensia smashed its face repetitively against the railing of the bed until Jenny grabbed her arm. “What?”

 

“What are you doing that for? A doctor was nice enough to give you a gift. Why are you destroying it?” 

 

“That’s why they gave it to me.” Hortensia said. “It’s a therapy doll.” Jenny didn’t look convinced. Hortensia sighed, annoyed that she had to explain. “For when I get angry, I can just…” she began strangling the doll. “See, it doesn’t hurt it.” Even if she didn’t want to talk about it, she found herself explaining. “She said to channel everything that’s been happening and go nuts.” She yanked on its head for emphasis before setting it aside. 

 

“It’s kind of creepy looking.” Matilda giggled. “It’s eyes don’t line up.” Jenny picked up the doll and examined it.

 

“A little bit.” Jenny agreed. “And you’re sure that’s why they gave it to you? You’re not just saying that because you don’t like it?” 

 

Hortensia suddenly felt her eyes beginning to well with tears. 

 

“I’m not lying!” Jenny held up her hands.

 

“That’s not what I meant, I’m sorry.” She turned the doll over in her hands for a moment looking it over before giving its head an experimental tug. After confirming it wasn’t going to split open any time soon, she set it back down. “Does it help?” 

 

Hortensia thought about it. She must have rammed its creepy little head into her tray at least twenty times last night before strangling it, followed by a botched decapitation attempt. 

 

“It does.” She picked up the doll. “I just picture my target and…” Jenny looked at her uneasily and suddenly Hortensia felt a deep feeling of shame wash over her. As for why, she couldn’t say. She sank down into her bed uneasily. Jenny looked like she was going to say something, but stopped. An awkward silence fell between them. 

 

“Who do you think of when you smash its head in?” Matilda asked with a laugh. 

 

“Matilda,” Jenny hissed. She must be afraid I’d bring up him, Hortensia thought.

 

“I thought it was stupid at first.” Hortensia said. She picked up the doll and rocked it for a minute on her stomach before letting it fall. “But I was really mad last night, and after beating this up, I felt better.”

 

“If it helps.” Jenny said with a shrug. “What got you upset?” 

 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Hortensia mumbled, looking away as she sank further down. She could feel the tips of her ears turning pink. 

 

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Hortensia shook her head, stopped and slowly nodded sheepishly. 

 

“Can you find my nurse?” She was beginning to be unable to sit comfortably. 

 

“Are you in pain?” Jenny asked, a worried crease forming in her forehead. “Is something wrong?”

 

“Uh, no, I-I just need the bathroom.” She’d show Jenny she was behaving. She winced slightly at the memory of last night. If Jenny found out… 

 

“Oh, I’m sorry, of course. You just woke up. Matilda, can you go find Susan? Do you remember what she looks like?”

 

“Yeah, mom I remember!” Matilda huffed. “I forget one thing.” she grumbled. 

 

“And here,” Jenny dug through her purse and retrieved a couple pounds. “After you do that, go pick Tens out some snacks.” 

 

“Tens can’t have snacks, she’s on a special diet, remember?” Matilda said. 

 

“Right now I’m picturing it’s you.” Hortensia mouthed at her and began strangling the doll. Matilda grinned at her. 

 

“What?” Jenny asked, looking between them. 

 

“Nothing.” they both said in unison. 

 

“Then get yourself something, but no sugar!” Jenny said as she slipped out the door. Hortensia shifted uncomfortably in place. She would have already wet her nappy by now, but they had taken them away. 

“These were for in case you couldn’t make it, not in lou of.” Susan had told her when she noticed Hortensia’s pattern of refusing the bedpan and regularly needing a new nappy. So Hortensia would ask preemptively this time and hope it earned her points with Susan. Maybe she could cash it in later for an extra juice box.

 

So she waited. And waited. She was starting to squirm. 

 

“Honey, do you want me to just help you now?” Jenny asked in a low voice. Hortensia stared at her a moment, puzzled. 

 

“With what?” Jenny pointed to the commode in the corner. Hortensia felt her ears prickle again.

 

“N-no, that’s okay. I’m not allowed by myself.” Hortensia grumbled. 

 

“You’re not by yourself, so it’s okay.” Jenny said. She stood up from her chair.

 

“N-no, I don’t want to get in trouble.” Hortensia said. A lie. Sort of. She didn’t know if Jenny was allowed to help her or not. She just didn’t want them to tell her about last night. “I-I can wait. I’m supposed to use the bedpan if I just have to wee anyway an- No, Jenny!” Hortensia groaned. She was looking through the cupboards. She bawled her hands into fists and craned her neck to see out the door. No one was there, she grimaced. 

 

“Found it.” Jenny said. She held it in her hand. “Yes? No?” Hortensia stared open mouthed at her for a moment before shaking her head. “Are you wearing a nappy?” she whispered.

 

“I wish.” She winced the moment the words were out of her mouth. She felt her face turn pink. 

 

“What about night time?” 

 

“There’s pads under me.” Hortensia said. Her sugar had started to level out. She was having fewer and fewer episodes, and had even started waking up dry. 

 

All at once the urge was much worse than it was. Sitting still started to feel impossible. Finally, Jenny got to her feet again. 

 

“Sweetheart, let me help you, alright?” Hortensia sank down in the bed again wishing to disappear.. “I did this for Matilda when she was hurt last year. ” 

 

“That’s different.”

 

“How’s it different?” She stood next to the bed now, detested object in hand. 

 

“She’s your kid.”

 

“You're kinda my kid now too.” Jenny laughed. She stared at the bedding already bunched around her feet.  “Pull up your gown and lift your buns.” Hortensia did. “Call me when you're ready.” She pulled the curtain around her bed before Hortensia heard the scraping of a chair nearby. 

 

Once the feeling of wanting to fall into a hole and die had subsided to merely tripping over a log and skinning her knee, she focused on the task at hand. Okay, she could do this. She tried to relax, only to be rewarded with two seconds of dribbling. Her bladder protested. She tried again. Nothing. She grunted in annoyance. 30 seconds. A minute. Two minutes. Nothing. She ached. Burned even. 

 

“Everything okay? Are you ready for me?” 

 

“No, I-I can’t go.” 

 

“I’ll turn the faucet on for you.” All it did was make her dribble again. She had to pee, what gives? “Any luck?” 

 

“No,” she whined. “It won’t come out.” 

 

“Just try and relax as much as possible. I know it’s hard.” 

 

“Have you ever had to?” There was silence.

 

“Once.” Another pause. “It was horrible.” Hortensia was surprised by her honesty. 

 

“What happened?” More silence.

 

“I missed.” Hortensia chuckled.

 

“How do you miss?” she laughed. Jenny cleared her throat.

 

“Well, I..umm.” She coughed.

 

“Yes?” Hortensia snickered. “Go on.”

 

“I was also having trouble…getting started.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“So my nurse told me to give a strong push, so I shut my eyes, and I squeezed, and, well…”

 

“Yes, but, how did you miss?” Hortensia laughed. 

 

“My legs weren’t closed all the way, and physically speaking, things down there are a little.. altered. It, uh, rooster tailed up all over the bed and onto the floor.” She finished and cleared her throat. “And the nurse.” There was a moment of silence before Hortensia doubled over laughing. 

 

“Y-you know how in D&D you roll the dice to play? That's like what happens when you roll a one.” Hortensia cackled. Jenny laughed.

 

“At least I rolled.” 

 

Point taken.

 

She felt like she tried everything. Legs closed. Legs open. One knee up. Both knees up. Finally, she got up onto her knees like a mirror cat and held the pan under her with both hands. She could finally feel something beginning to happen. Yes!  A slow trickle. She let out an exuberant sigh of relief, vaguely aware only some was getting into the pan, the rest was running down her leg, but she didn’t care. She pushed. It burned a little, like she had just gotten out of the pool. Hortensia scowled. It seemed to only be coming out at a third of the speed it should. It didn’t feel right, like someone was clamping the other end of a hose. If it would only come out normally it would all go where it’s supposed to. 

 

Footsteps were coming. 

 

“Hortensia, I’m here. Sorry for the wait.” Oh no. Stop. Stop. Stop. Only now she couldn’t. The curtain was yanked back. 

 

“Uh…” Her eyes went from Susan, to Jenny, and back to Susan. She couldn’t stop. It just kept…trickling down her legs.  She moved the pan closer but it didn’t help. Susan let out an exasperated sigh. “Sorry,” Hortensia mumbled.

 

“At least she’s over the pads.” Jenny offered with a grimace. 

 

“I did not think I needed to explain how to use a bedpan.” Susan said, sounding bemused. “Please, wait for me next time.” 

 

“Sorry, it was my fault.” Jenny said. “She looked so miserable.”

 

“You know it just slides under her, right?” 

 

“That is how I left it, yes.” Jenny said, fist to her forehead. Susan pinched at her eyebrows for a moment before letting out another sigh.

 

“When you’re done, I'll take that.” Hortensia awkwardly handed it over, letting her now wet hospital gown fall into place. She looked down at the bed and scowled. Did she get any of it in the pan? Susan stared into it for a second, swishing its contents around before heading into the bathroom to dump what little had been captured. 

 

“Why are you kneeling on the bed like that?” Matilda asked, appearing in the doorway, a peanut butter stuffed Ritz cracker midway to her mouth. “And why are you all wet?” 

 

“I-I spilled my cup.” Hortensia mumbled. 

 

“Liar.” she said. 

 

“Matilda!” Jenny chastised. 

 

“Did you find your family, hun?” A voice from outside the doorway asked. Hortensia craned to see, but the figure was just outside her line of sight. 

 

“Yes, thank you, Miss Abigail.” Matilda called back out before her eyes cast down. “I went back to the wrong room.” She mumbled. Hortensia could just make out a crease of concern form over Jenny’s forehead. 

 

“Don’t sit down yet,” Susan said, snapping her attention back to her current state. She pulled the pads out from under her and tossed them in the trash. “Go on and pat yourself dry with your gown. It’s going bye-bye anyway.” 

 

“Well, speaking of going bye -bye.” Jenny said, getting to her feet. “We best be off. We’ll give you some privacy while you get cleaned up. Matilda just wanted to tell you about her test since we were here.” Hortensia’s insides twisted. The thought of being here alone filled her with a sense of dread. Her heart beat began to quicken.

 

“W-wait,” Hortensia said, collapsing back onto the bed. Jenny turned and stared expectantly at her. “When will you be back?”

 

“This afternoon!” Matilda said. “Mom has an appointment today. Room 1674 on the fifth floor at 4 O'clock. See, I remember.”

 

“I think you want 1694,” Susan said. “Unless your mom plans on getting her prostate examined.” Hortensia chuckled as Jenny’s face began to pale. 

 

“Women don’t have prostates.” Matilda said, face crinkled. Susan looked down at her, surprised. 

 

“Very smart observation. Wow. I’m impressed.” Susan said, nodding her head appreciatively. “How old are you?” 

 

“Six. I like reading medical books. I’m going to be a doctor.” Matilda said as a matter of fact. “But I can’t decide what kind.” 

 

“Yes, I’m sure you’ll make a great doctor some day.” Susan said, turning her attention back to Hortensia. 

 

“I liked neurology, but now that i’m reading about diabetes, I’m finding the endocrine system fascinating. Did you know there’s two main parts of the pancreas? The endocrine and the exocrine, and they both have their own separate jobs…” Matilda rambled on. Hortensia rolled her eyes. Show off, she thought, although she was touched Matilda cared enough to read up on it. All this carb counting was confusing and having a walking, talking calculator would come in handy.  

 

Susan slowly turned her head and stared down at her, then up at Jenny as if to ask, “This kid for real?” She studied her for a moment and then asked, “Do you know how many bones there are in the human body?” Matilda frowned. Too easy, Hortensia thought. “It’s okay if you don’t know.”

 

“In an infant or an adult? Because an infant has anywhere between 270-305 bones before fusing to become the standard 206.” Susan’s mouth seemed to hang open for a moment. “I like to read.” Matilda said, as if that answered everything. 

 

“My, that’s…” Susan seemed to remain speechless for a moment. She hadn’t even gotten to the math questions. 

 

“That’s nothing.” Hortensia said. “Watch, if I eat five rolls, a turkey sandwich, and a slice of pie, how much insulin will I need?”

 

“What’s your starting sugar?” 

 

“Normal range.” Hortensia had no idea what normal range was. She also had no clue what Matilda’s answer even meant. What was a ul? But the look in Susan’s eyes said Matilda’s answer was correct. As usual. 

 

Gone was any pretense of pretend excitement. In her eyes, Matilda had gone from being a little kid showing her a cool rock she found outside, to the most amazing thing she had ever seen. 

 

“Oh. My. God.” She managed to choke out. She held a hand over her heart and chuckled. “What are you?” Matilda shrugged.

 

“Just Matilda, I guess.” 

 

Jenny had begun launching into their story of how they had met. Hortensia leaned back and breathed a sigh of relief. Jenny loved telling this story, which meant they weren’t going anytime soon. 

 

“...And they just let you take her?” Susan asked. She had turned back towards Hortensia and had begun to strip her, her curtain still wide open. So much for privacy. 

 

“Best day of my life.” Jenny gushed, placing an affectionate arm around Matilda and pulled her in. “We really do need to be going-”

 

“No!” Hortensia shouted. “I- I-” She racked her brain trying to think of something, anything… “I need help with homework.” Her eyes fell on her backpack of school books she hadn’t touched even once since being checked in. Jenny gave her a sympathetic smile.

 

“You don’t need to worry about school right now. We can catch you up when you’re feeling better.” 

 

“I can help her with her homework if you let me stay. You’re coming back later this afternoon.” Matilda offered. 

 

“Absolutely not.” Jenny chuckled sarcastically. “You? Unattended? In a hospital? You’ll try to sneak into a surgery and watch. ”

 

“I would not.” Matilda pouted. “It’s not like I go to that school anymore, not really.” 

 

“No, Tens needs her rest. She doesn’t need you driving her mental.” 

 

“I don’t mind.” Hortensia said. “It’s boring here. Please?” Jenny winced.

 

“I can’t leave her here unattended.” she said apologetically. 

 

“She’s not unattended. I’m here.” Hortensia insisted.

 

“Tens, she could just walk right out the door and there isn’t a thing you could do to stop her.” It was true. Hortensia was powerless. She grabbed Raggedy An-Ming and began to throttle it, hiding her tear streaked face. Or maybe Jenny thought she was responsible for Matilda’s accident and was afraid to leave her alone, afraid she might take her emotions out on her like she was doing to the doll. Either answer left her feeling sullen and resentful. Not at Jenny, but at herself. 

 

“I’ll behave, pleeaase?” Matilda begged. 

 

“Matilda,” Jenny sighed. “Maybe under normal conditions, but you're not yourself right now.” Hortensia lifted her head, surprised. This wasn’t about her? 

 

“But I’m fine now!” Matilda protested. 

 

“You’re not fine! You got lost coming back from the vending machine.”

 

“Well,” Susan interjected, “This place is awfully big for someone so small. I can see how a little one could get turned around.” But Matilda wasn’t a typical, “little one”. Matilda didn’t just get “turned around.” Along with being a living, breathing calculator, she was also a human compass. She could find her way to anything. Ask her where the jelly was and she’d tell you, “aisle six, section two, third row from the bottom” in any grocery store she had ever stepped foot into, without even looking up from her book. Only…she had forgotten what room Jenny’s appointment was in. 

 

“She’ll drive you mental.” Jenny said. Mental was fine. Mental was great even, because mental was better than being afraid.

 

“No, I won’t.” Matilda said. 

 

“And you’re going to drive Susan mental with all your questions.” 

 

“Will not.” Matilda said, but with less confidence now. When Matilda wanted to know something, nothing would stand in her way, privacy and social norms be damned. But along with Hortensia’s desire to not be alone, was a burning curiosity to know what she had done to her. And Matilda seemed just as keen to stay as Hortensia was to keep her there. She wanted to know why. Maybe it was because she had someone new to show off to, but Hortensia didn’t think that was it. 

 

“I don’t mind if she stays.” Susan said. “I’ll be checking up on this one throughout the day anyway.” She was clearly intrigued by Matilda, as most adults were upon discovering she was more than met the eye. Hortensia saw a day full of “what’s 2,784 times 826” in their future. She doubted Susan would look this eager at the prospect of a parent using the hospital as a daycare for any other kid. 

 

She could see a war raging in Jenny’s eyes as her mouth opened and closed. 

 

Finally, Hortensia delivered the final blow to her reservations. The truth.

 

“I don’t want to be alone.” she mumbled. 

 

“You do not leave this room for any reason. You will not harass the nurses. They are here to do a job, not entertain you. And you will give Tens her privacy when she needs it. Do you understand?” Jenny demanded.

 

Says the woman watching her get a sponge bath, Hortensia thought.  Susan had one of her legs in one hand, a wipe in the other, and was removing any chance Hortensia could pass this off as spilled water. 

Liar, Liar, pants on fire, Matilda mouthed as their eyes met. Hortensia picked up Ann-Ming, pointed to it, and mouthed, this is you, before choking it with no real force. Matilda grinned. 

 

“And as for you,” Jenny said, turning her attention to Hortensia. She felt her stomach drop. So they had told her…but instead of a lecture, Jenny’s mouth turned upward in a teasing grin. “Try not to roll any more 1’s.”  

 

“That was a solid seven!” Hortensia called out as Jenny turned to go. 

 

“HA!” came the reply. 

 

“Have fun getting your prostate checked later!” 

 

“Have fun with DYK!” Jenny called back and cackled. “I threw you a life raft. You should have taken it!”  It was their secret pet name for Matilda when she was in one of her “Did You Know” moods. 

 

“Did you know a regulation golf ball has 336 dimples?” “Did you know avocados are a fruit and not a vegetable? Did you know…” and on and on it went. She had been ecstatic over winning some kind of jr. chess tournament (which was kind of like a professional basketball player getting excited over dunking on a toddler, in Hortensia’s opinion)  and was info dumping like mad. A habit she often had when she got keyed up. 

 

“Did you know I don’t care?!” Hortensia had shot back one night over dinner, making Matilda cry. If looks could kill… but Jenny had eventually stepped in and explained, “While I find learning new things just as exciting as you sweetheart, let’s be aware others may find it a bit tiresome after a while.” 

 

She looked to Matilda, who was now grinning from ear to ear,  clearly dying to tell her something.  So this was the reason she had wanted to stay.

 

“What?” Hortensia asked once they were alone. 

 

Matilda ran up to her and excitedly whispered.

 

“I have a new power!”

[CDfm]

Wonderful new chapter.  These constant cliffhangers are killing me.  Now I am dying to know what Matilda is capable of.  Like her other special abilities are nothing.  I am also curious about what happened to Hortensia that night prior.  My concern is that she was visited by members of the church again.  
looking forward to seeing what happens next. 

[SashaButters]

The group of nurses squealed with delight. 

 

“I told you, it’s the little one that’s teaching the big one!” Another squeal. 

Hortensia felt her temple throb. She wiped a sweaty hand down her face and tried to think. If the train is going 26/KMH for 37 minutes… She tapped her pencil on the tray before writing down the equation.

 

“No, you want to find the TTA. The speed goes here, on this line.” Matilda pointed to the paper. 

 

“What’s a TTA?” Now she was just making things up and showing off. 

 

“Time to Arrival,  I already explained this, stop doodling! Focus!” Hortensia groaned. She had been drawing Ann-Ming getting hit by the train in the textbook while Matilda had been showing off for the nurses. 

 

“You know, I didn’t actually want to do homework.” Hortensia said for what felt like the tenth time,

 

“I’m trying to help you, y’know.” Matilda said gravely. “You’re a month behind everyone else.” Hortensia just shrugged. School felt so trivial now. Everything felt trivial. Drawing. Eating. Pokemon. Comics. Video games. 

 

“I don’t see how Jenny expects me to catch up.” 

 

Matilda was quiet for a moment before quietly saying, “she doesn’t.” 

 

“See? Then what’s the poi-”

 

“She plans on holding you back.” Hortensia felt a rock in her stomach. Just when she thought things couldn’t get any worse. Matilda looked away and muttered, “Mrs. Phelps is awful, I don’t want you to have to go back to her. I want to help you, but school work is all I’m good for.” Hortensia sighed. She sure made it hard to be annoyed with her. 

 

“You say it like it's a bad thing.” Hortensia said. She tapped her pencil on the tray in front of her. “You’re a lot more bloody useful to have around than I am.” She felt her incompetence covering her like a heavy blanket, visible to everyone but her. Hortensia picked up Ann-Ming and began to smack it against her tray. So stupid! She was so stupid! 

 

“I like having you around.” Matilda said softly.

 

“Why? Because I make you look good?” Hortensia scoffed. 

 

“No.” Matilda mumbled. She could see a flash of hurt on her face. Hortensia rubbed at her forehead.

 

“Why then?” She asked. Matilda was silent. Hortensia let out a dismissive “Psh, you’re just being polite, you don’t re-”

 

“You’re funny.” Matilda blurted out. “I don’t always understand jokes.” That was an understatement. “But you still manage to make me laugh.” 

 

“Great, so I’ll be a comedian.” she said sarcastically. 

 

“...and you’re brave, and strong, and nothing like him!” Hortensia frowned. 

 

“Nothing like who?” 

 

“Mikey!” 

 

“Wh-” but then Hortensia remembered. She shifted uncomfortably at the compliment. “From what you’ve told me, he doesn’t set the bar very high.” 

 

“He doesn’t, does he?” Matilda grinned. They were silent for a moment. The gaggle of nurses who had come to spectate began to file out of the room one by one until only Susan remained. 

 

“I don’t feel like that girl anymore.” Horrtensia said softly, breaking the silence. The kid who fought the Trunchbull, without a trace of fear, seemed like another person in another lifetime. “I’m not her anymore. I’m…” she paused, searching for the right word. “Different.” Damaged. Used up. Dirty. Stupid. Trash. However she meant it, she hadn’t meant it as a good thing, but nonetheless, Matilda’s eyes began to shine with excitement as she stared at her. 

 

“Different? So you feel it? How different do you feel? Good? Bad?” 

 

Uhh…

 

“Bad?” Hortensia said slowly. “How am I supposed to feel good about getting ra-uhh, are we talking about the same thing?” 

 

“I’m talking about three days ago. Wait, what are you talking about?” 

 

“Doesn’t matter, but oh! That was you!” She dropped her voice to a whisper. “Is this your new power?” Matilda gave her a beaming smile. 

 

“What do you feel? How are you different?” Hortensia thought about it. Her eyes darted to Susan, then back to Matilda. 

 

“I’m starting to re-” No, she didn’t want to go down this road. It was too easy to forget she was only six. “Hey, when did my sugar start leveling out?” She asked Susan’s back. She was doing something over on the counter by the sink. She could hear the crinkling of plastic.

 

“Well, it was doing good until yesterday evening.” Susan said. “It spiked pretty good in the night. Were you anxious at all?” Yes. Yes she was. “Did what we talk about stress you out?” Yes. Yes it did. Hortensia felt frozen as two pairs of eyes stared expectantly at her. 

 

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. 

 

She picked up Ann-Ming and began to pull on her hair. 

 

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Susan said. Hortensia’s face burned with embarrassment. Her eyes stung with tears and she buried her face in Spot’s fur. 

 

“What did you guys talk about?” Matilda asked, oblivious to the tension in the room. 

 

“Nothing you need to be concerned with.” Susan said. Matilda scowled. She hated being dismissed. “Now,” Susan came forward to the edge of the bed. “Are you going to be difficult? Do I need to call for backup?” Hortensia shook her head, eyes still shut in a failing attempt to keep the tears at bay. “Good, now give me your hand and stay perfectly still. This doesn’t have to be a major ordeal.” Reluctantly, she stuck out her arm. “Keep your eyes shut.” 

 

 She was doing something with the needle in her hand. Was she taking it out? Hortensia peeked. She was! A piece of gauze was placed over the spot where it had been, before a piece of tape was placed over it. She flexed her hand. Free at last! 

 

“Now give me your other hand.” Hortensia looked up. Her tray now had little white squares and a new needle sitting in its wrapper. She let out a quiet, pitiful sounding whimper. “You need a new one, it’s been a few days.” She remained frozen. “Hortensia…” She felt her other hand moving of its own accord. “Thank you.” 

Hortensia shot Matilda a glare. Invisible hands were holding it in place. She gave it a tug, but it wouldn’t move.

 Susan was pressing on the top of Hortensia’s hand, tapping and then flicking. “There it is.” She ripped open one of the white squares and began to wipe the top of her hand. It was cold, wet, and stung a little. When she reached for the needle, Hortensia shut her eyes and looked away, before grabbing Spot in a one armed embrace. She tightened her grip as the needle pierced her skin and bore down with her teeth, waiting for the inevitable, unbearable pain and burning. But it didn’t come.

 

“Done.” Susan announced. Hortensia cracked an eye open as Susan was placing a clear piece of tape over the plastic tube to hold it down. Hortensia stared in astonishment. It had stung, but not terribly. And where was the fourth-fifth-sixth try all up and down her arms?

 

“That’s it?” 

 

“See how easy it can be when you don’t fight us?” Susan said with a smirk. 

 

“But I didn’t fight you the last time, and it still took a dozen tries!” 

 

“A dozen?” Susan playfully scoffed, but then stopped as if to count, “It took a few tries, but that was because you wouldn’t stay still. You kept jumping at the worst possible moment.” 

 

“That was the easiest IV I’ve ever had! Thank you!” Hortensia said.  She let out a held breath and laid back on her pillow, relieved it was over.  

 

“You are certainly welcome.” Susan said, even though she wasn’t the one being addressed. Matilda giggled, but then stopped suddenly and frowned. She rubbed at the side of her head, wincing as she did so. 

 

“You okay?” 

 

“Headache.” Matilda mumbled. 

 

“You should take it easy.” Hortensia said with a grin. “Come, lay down, let’s put the homework stuff away…”

 

“Nice try.” Matilda said. Hortensia let out an exasperated sigh, but smiled. If she could do that to her arm… No one who shouldn’t be was getting through that door. 

 

“Thanks for staying.” 

 

…

 

Carol was “oohing” and “ahhing” in all the right places. Jennifer appreciated her. 

 

“That bastard!” Carol blurted out, but then covered her mouth, remembering she was at school. 

 

“...So he’s not coming.” Jennifer said, finishing up her story. 

 

“And the baby daddy drama begins.” she teased. Jennifer felt her stomach drop. Was that all Brian had become now? Her “baby daddy”? They had officially called it off. She thought she would be heartbroken. It was her first break up after all, but with everything going on, she just felt numb. Her “summer fling” was over and it was time to go back to the real world. 

 

“How are you taking it?” 

 

“I’m,” she sucked in a breath, “I’m okay, really. With everything going on with the girls, a relationship right now feels like too much to juggle.” Going to the cinema. Playing mini golf. Bowling. Sex. It all felt wrong now. Not that they had had much sex lately. Her well had dried up, so to speak. 

 

“That’s one way to put things in perspective.” Carol said. “How’s the little squirt taking it? You’re awfully quiet back there.” She called into the back corner.

 

“She’s not here. She’s visiting with Hortensia.”  

 

“And they get along okay? They're so different.” Jennifer laughed.

 

“They drive each other mental on Monday, nearly brawling on Tuesday, and by Wednesday they’ll be cuddled up on the couch together watching a movie or working on their comic. They really are like sisters at this point. I don’t know how Matilda’s going to handle it when Eve comes back. She’s climbing the walls with Hortensia being in the hospital. She doesn’t like change.” 

 

“And how’s she taking the break up?” Jennifer winced. “You did tell her, didn’t you?” Jennifer shook her head. Carol raised her eyebrows. “I know. I know. I’m going to tell her.” 

 

“Were they close?” 

 

“Not really. I think she tolerated him more for my sake, but I think the girls will be more upset about missing Thursday pizza and game night.” Carol chuckled. 

 

“And you trust her loose in the hospital by herself? I turned my back for two seconds and I caught her digging through the kids ' medical files.” Jennifer pursed her lips and gave her a pained expression.

 

“We’re working on boundaries.” Jennifer said apologetically. “Speaking of sensitive information…” Jennifer grimaced. Before Jennifer had entered the room that morning, Susan had pulled her over in the hallway to talk. 

 

“Just thought you should be aware…” the nurse had said.  She didn’t sound particularly disgusted, just concerned. Just more abnormal behavior to add to the list. 

 

One of the first things Jennifer had done when she got to the office was put in a call to Dr. Reinfield. Talking to her had helped ease her anxiety. She didn’t seem overly concerned. She suggested Jennifer have a talk with Hortensia about what was and wasn’t appropriate behavior. 

 

“What?” Carol asked. Jennifer shook her head. As much as she wanted “Dr. Rodgers” to handle this for her, she thought better of it. 

 

“Nothing.” Jennifer said. “There’s just something I have to do later.” 

 

…

 

“Tell me!”

 

“No!” 

 

“Please?”

 

“No!” 

 

“But I helped you!” Matilda said. “And now my head hurts.” Hortensia ground her teeth together. That manipulative little…

 

“It’s private.” Hortensia said through clenched teeth. “And embarrassing.” Matilda was lying on her stomach, head propped up on her fists, legs rocking back and forth. She stared at her with large, pleading eyes. 

 

“You blew up the commode in front of me. Can’t be worse than that.” Hortensia shut her eyes and groaned. Breakfast hadn’t sat well, it never did, and Susan was nowhere to be found. Out of pure necessity, she had needed Matilda to hold the commode in place so she could slide onto it without falling off the bed. Unfortunately, there was no time for Matilda to pull the curtain and duck for cover, treating her to a front row seat to Hortensia’s Spectacular Blowout Sale: Everything Must Go.   

 

“You got a Happy Meal out of it.” Hortensia grumbled. They had fixed the call light, and still no one had come.  Susan had brought her back Mcdonalds as a reward for preventing another major catastrophe after Matilda had regaled her with tales of the horrors of what she had just witnessed.  For someone who was that traumatized, she had no problem enjoying her chicken nuggets. 

 

“I’m eating my feelings.” Matilda had said with a grin and a mouth full of french fries. 

 

“But we’re sisters now. We’re supposed to tell each other everything.” Matilda insisted. Hortensia sighed. 

 

“They told me no nappies. That’s it, that’s the big secret.” Hortensia said. Matilda scrunched up her face. 

 

“Liar.” 

 

“I’m not lying.” She just wasn’t telling her the whole truth. “They didn’t like that I was weeing in them instead of the basin.” 

 

“Eww, you were weeing in them on purpose? Why?” 

 

 She pointed to the pole which held a suspended clear bag of fluid dangling off an arm. “This stuff runs through me like mad, I don’t know what it is, but it’s awful.” Matilda snickered. “What?”

 

“It’s saline.” 

 

“What’s that?”

 

“Water.” 

 

 The morning she had company was the morning her body decided all bets were off. All she wanted was a good, strong wee and a nap. Instead, the only liquid coming out was coming out of her arse, and she was spending it with the pint sized homework drill instructor. Hortensia rubbed at her stomach and shifted in place. 

 

“Seriously?” Matilda scowled. “Stop it, I know you're faking. Just a few more problems!” 

 

“I’m not faking it, I really need to wee this time.”

 

“That’s what you said last time and you peeing for like two seconds didn’t sound like an emergency. Quit stalling.”  

 

“I’m not stalling! I can’t focus on work when I have to wee.”

 

“I can’t keep doing this.” Matilda said. She rubbed at her eyes. Hortensia was surprised to find them bloodshot. “Okay, c’mon.” This time she slid off the bed and was physically holding the commode in place. 

 

“Eww, dude, no, just use your powers.” 

 

“It hurts too much.” 

 

“Then forget it; don’t worry about it. I’ll wait for Susan.” She flicked her call light on. 

 

“You sure? I mean, as long as Mnt. St. Hortensia doesn’t blow again…”

 

“I can’t promise that.” Hortensia grimaced. “She’s still having aftershocks.” Matilda giggled. 

 

“I thought volcanoes are supposed to go ‘boom’ not ‘pfft’.” 

 

“That’s the sound of the hot lava.” 

 

“You could have warned me.”

 

“I couldn’t.” 

 

“At least volcanoes give warnings!”

 

“We were lucky it got in at all.” 

 

“Are you sure you’re not sick?” Matilda grabbed her own stomach. “I never want to be sick like that again.” 

 

“You shat on me!” 

 

“And you almost shat on me right back!” 

 

“I should’ve!” 

 

Her midsection gave a strong pulsing ache.  Hortensia let out a startled cry as she grabbed herself through her gown. “No no no.” she groaned.  The urge to pee had jumped from a five to a nine in a few seconds. 

 

“Eww, not on the bed!” Matilda said, jumping away for cover. Hortensia hung her head as warm liquid began to trickle down her waist and onto the pads below her. She relaxed and let it happen. Like all the other times, the amount didn’t match the urgency. She tried to wipe herself off with a dry section of the pad.

 

“It’s not like its shi-”

 

“Hey, girls,” both heads turned to see Susan in the doorway with a deep scowl on her face. “Try and keep the language to a minimum. I don’t mind if you're laughing and joking, but please be respectful of the other patients.” 

 

“Sorry, Miss Susan.” Matilda said, hanging her head. 

 

“Is this really the kind of example you want to be setting for her? You're her big sister now. She’s going to mimic what you say.”

 

“Okay.” Hortensia mumbled. She looked at Matilda, who looked like she was going to laugh. 

 

“Did you need something?” 

 

“I needed the commode.” 

 

“Alright, come scoot over.” But Hortensia shook her head. “What?” 

 

“She had an accident.” Matilda announced. Hortensia balked. No problem talking about it when it wasn’t her…

 

“What happened to my little helper?” Susan joked. Matilda frowned, looking guilt stricken. “I’m joking honey, this is my job, not yours.” before turning to Hortensia. “Alright, move up anyway and let's try while I clean this up.”

 

“I don’t think she’s well.” Matilda said “She keeps saying she needs a wee, but only a little comes out.”

 

“Matilda!” Hortensia groaned. “Shut. It.” She pushed herself up onto her elbows, ready to shove herself over when Susan stopped her. 

 

“For how long?” 

 

“All morning.” Hortensia said. “It’s annoying, and I feel so- I can’t describe it. Like I ate too much?”

 

“Bloated.” Susan hummed to herself. “Do you still feel any pressure in your pelvis?” Hortensia nodded. She clicked her tongue. “Any pain in your back?”

 

“No. But I feel like I need to wee all the time.”

 

“Okay, I’ll let your doctor know. Hang tight. But let me get you cleaned up real quick. Turn on your side…Hmm, not that much. It has a red tint to it. Are you on your period?”

 

“She shouldn’t be on it until next Wednesday.” Matilda said. Hortensia gritted her teeth. She had told her to stop tracking it! That was… weird. “I’m sorry,” Matilda said, holding her hands in the air in surrender. “I don’t do it on purpose, I just know.”  

 

She was rolled back on a new pad. “It’s time for me to take your stats anyway. Let’s take your temperature. Under the tongue, there we go.” She looked at it before going to the counter and writing something on her chart. “You’re running a bit of a fever, do you feel sick?”

 

“Just the usual.” Nausea and violent diarrhea. But they had already established it as a side effect of the medication. They had switched to a different brand, but still the problem persisted. Thankfully she had only thrown up once, and that had been a few days ago. She had felt so much better after, she kind of wished she could throw up now. Right on the homework. 

No…she had worked hard today. Matilda had walked her through several days of assignments, and she hadn’t thought of him once. She rotated her sore wrist, stopping as the blood pressure cuff around her arm began to inflate. Then came the finger prick. 

 

“Well,” Susan said with an exasperated sigh, “Your sugar’s high, your temperature is high, and your blood pressure’s low. You’re a right mess today, missy. I’m going to call Dr. Willows and see what she says.” 

 

“Sorry,” Matilda mumbled as she left. “I thought you were doing it on purpose.” She went to climb back up on the bed and stopped. “Your feet! Look at your feet. They look like sausages.” she laughed. With a grimace of discomfort, Hortensia pushed herself up and stared down the length of the bed. Where her feet and ankles should have been were now two rotund and pudgy looking mounds of flesh. 

 

“The fuck.” she muttered. She wiggled them back and forth. She felt like she was having a dream. She let herself fall back down. Now that she knew she was running a fever, she could feel it. Her body ached and she felt chilled to the bone. 

 

Matilda was packing up the school stuff by hand. 

 

“Why aren’t you using your powers?” Hortensia mumbled. Everyone always complimented Matilda on her amazing work ethic, but Hortensia knew the truth. She was the laziest one of them all. Why get off the couch when you can make it come to you? 

 

“Cause I don’t want to get caught. She said she’s coming right back.” Hortensia waved her hand in a dismissive gesture. 

 

“‘I’ll be right back’ can mean anything here.” but just as the words had left her mouth, someone new appeared in the doorway pushing a cart of…damn it! 

 

“Hi, good afternoon, I need to take a blood sample.” She was relieved to discover they didn’t need to use a needle. He simply hooked a tube one at a time to a port on her I.V. and the blood began to flow. Matilda watched mesmerized, but Hortensia still needed to turn her head.

 

“My sugar’s making me feel shaky.” Hortensia explained. Matilda just grinned at her.

 

“Sure it is.” she teased. 

 

A few minutes later ( or maybe longer, she had a feeling she had fallen asleep for a bit) Susan came back followed by a middle aged woman in a white coat. 

 

“Hi, Hortensia, do you remember me? I’m Doctor Willows.” Hortensia shook her head. Everyone was starting to look the same. “I hear you’re not feeling so hot. Can you tell me what’s bothering you?” 

 

“I don’t feel well.” 

 

“Can you be more specific?” 

 

“Go ahead.” Hortensia waved a hand at Matilda, who looked like it was taking every bit of self control in her to stay quiet. She didn’t feel like talking right now. Matilda eagerly launched into a detailed explanation on her behalf. 

 

“Wow,” Dr. Willows said. “You’re quite articulate.” Matilda beamed up at her proudly. Dr. Willows turned her attention back to Hortensia. She examined her swollen feet, then her arms and neck. Finally she stopped at her midriff. She pulled the gown up to her chest, exposing her to the room. “I’m going to press around and you tell me if it hurts.” Hortensia winced almost at once. She lightened the pressure and felt around. “When was the last time you peed?” 

 

Hortensia shifted her eyes to Matilda, who looked overjoyed to be witnessing a live episode of a medical drama. She was completely and utterly entranced, eyes as wide as saucers as she drank it all in. Hortensia was going to end up in one of her medical fantasy stories; she just knew it.

 

“Twenty- thirty minutes ago.” Hortensia said. 

 

“Okay, when was the last time you peed and felt empty?”

 

“Last night.”

 

“Can you put her on the bedpan? I want to see if she can go on her own before we resort to a catheter.” Susan left and returned a few seconds later with one and rolled Hortensia on to it. “It’s really important you try and pee as much as you can. We don’t like to do this unless we have to.” 

 

Hortensia did try, despite the audience. Dr. Willows even began pushing on her bladder, but it only resulted in producing a groan of pain. 

 

“Go ahead and set it up, she’s retaining too much fluid.” 

 

Go ahead and set ‘what’ up? Hortensia looked from Dr. Willows to Matilda, who had a slight grimace on her face. 

 

“What’s happening? I’m not getting another needle, am I?” 

 

“No, no needles. It will be quick and painless. You might feel a little pressure, that’s all.” Hortensia didn’t believe her, and the look on Matilda’s face told her all she needed to know. This wasn’t going to be pleasant.

 

When Susan returned with a bag of tubing, Hortensia felt herself begin to crumble. 

 

“What are you going to do with that?” She demanded. 

 

“Best you not know.”

 

“Is it going in my arse?” Oh god, they were going to put it in her arse like that one time and make her shit herself.

 

“What did I tell you about that mouth of yours?”

 

“Is it?!” 

 

“No, it’s not going in your bottom; it’s going_”

 

“In your urethra.” Matilda said with a wrinkled face. 

 

“I’m impressed.” Dr. Willows said amused. “Are your parents in the medical field?”

 

“What’s a urethra?” Hortensia asked. It sounded horrible. Her heart was starting to hammer in her chest.  She was up on her elbows so she could see, trying to ignore the weakness that followed quick movement. 

 

“It’s where your pee comes out.” Matilda said.

 

She felt a pair of hands grab her legs and an overwhelming sense of panic began to take hold. Hortensia bunched herself into a tight ball. 

 

“Don’t play these games with us, Hortensia.” Susan said. “This is serious.”

 

“Don’t do it! Please don’t! Please!” She was crying now, but she didn’t care. She was curled into a tight ball despite the pain in her abdomen, hands holding onto herself to block entry. 

 

“Hortensia! Stop this!” Susan hissed in her ear. “Do you want your little sister to see you acting like a baby?” 

 

“I don’t care! I don’t care! Don’t do it! I’ll pee on my own!” Hortensia sobbed. If it was anything like back in the Emergency Room, it was going to be awful, and Hortensia couldn’t take any more awful. She felt like she was drowning in it. She uncurled her upper half, picked up the doll and began to violently smash her face into the bed. “Stupid! YOUR STUPID! YOU’RE SO FUCKING STUPID!”

 

“HORTENSIA!” 

 

“I HATE YOU!” She started smashing the doll with both hands, pounding it into the railing.

 

“If you don’t calm down right now you’re getting sedated.” Susan said. Hortensia stopped. She could hardly breathe. Her vision blurred with tears. Her chest heaved up and down.

 

“Get her a bag to breathe in.” Dr. Willows said. “Let’s get through this and maybe a nurse will get you a special treat.”

 

“I want a nappy.” The words were out before she could stop them. 

 

“You can’t have a nappy. We talked about this last night.” Susan said. 

 

“I just like the sound they make!” Hortensia cried. “It helps me an-an-anchor.” 

 

“If it will get her through this, give it to her.” Dr. Willows said. Susan’s lips pressed tightly together, before she went out and returned a few moments later with one. 

 

“For after.” But Hortensia reached her arm out for it. She took it and laid down with it on the bed, kneading and clawing it with her fingers. She listened to the crinkle and shut her eyes. A time before all this. Crinkle. Crickle. Crinkle. Before she had made these choices. Crinkle. Crinkle. Crinkle. Before it was her fault. Crinkle. Crinkle. Crinkle. Before he had come into her life. Before her dad had left. Crinkle. Crinkle. Crinkle. Before. Before. Before. When no one expected her not to cry. 

 

“Are you good? I’m gonna start.” Susan asked. She was turned onto her side, one leg raised up and bent at the knee as if she were a painting of a runner. Hortensia  grabbed Spot and held him in a tight embrace. She didn’t know what she had expected, but it wasn’t… that. 

 

“That’s it?” Hortensia asked with a sniffle. Dr. Willows laughed.

 

“That’s it.” Susan agreed. 

 

“I thought it was going to be like the one they put up my ar- err, butt.” 

 

“She means like an enema.” Matilda said. 

 

“No, nothing like that.” She began to press down on her lower belly. It didn’t hurt as much as it had, but it was still sore to the touch. “Sorry, we need to make sure we get it all out. You might have an infection, we’re waiting on the lab work to confirm. Are you getting any relief?” 

 

“I don’t know.” Hortensia said. Her eyes were still shut tight and she was trying to picture herself anywhere but here. Skatepark. Legend of Zelda. D&D. Pokemon. She crinkled the nappy some more. Popsicles on a hot summer day. Playing in the sprinklers. Chasing Jenny with the garden hose. 

 

It was still too hard to breathe. She wouldn’t feel better until this tube was out of her. 

“Are we leaving it in?” Susan asked. Hortensia’s heart dropped. 

 

“No, pull it out once you’ve got everything.” Dr. Willows said. “I want to see if she can pee on her own. And give her another bag of saline.” 

 

“Alright, you’re all done. No more catheter. It’s out. You can open your eyes now.” Susan said. But Hortensia wouldn’t open her eyes. She returned to her ball, tears still streaming down her face. “Is there anything you need?” Hortensia nodded her head and held out the nappy. “Hortensia…” 

 

“I won’t wee in it. I promise!” she cried. 

 

“You know that’s not the problem.” 

 

“What’s the problem?” Dr. Willows asked. Hortensia tensed, waiting for the outrage and disgust as she heard low whispered voices. “That’s not our priority right now. Give it to her. We’ll mark it in her chart; that’s a job for psych to handle.” 

 

“But her little sister’s here…”

 

“Then cover her with a blanket. If she’s going to do that, I don’t see how a nappy would make a difference.” Susan sighed. 

 

“If you want this on, you need to stretch out.” Slowly, Hortensia retracted from her ball, eyes still shut tight. She didn’t open them until the nappy was secured around her waist and Susan’s footsteps were retreating down the corridor. Her eyes slowly met with Matilda’s.

 

“Am I weird?” Hortensia asked softly.

 

“Yes.” Matilda said bluntly. She climbed back onto the bed, crawling past Hortensia’s knees and up towards the pillows where she laid down facing her. “But I’m not normal either.” She let out a yawn. “We can be weird together.” This time it was Hortensia who reached for her and put an arm around her. “You’re really hot.” 

 

“Thank you.” 

 

“Pfft, you know what I mean.” Matilda closed her eyes and scooted closer. “It feels good. You’re like a human heater. It’s cold in here.” Hortensia grabbed the blanket and covered both of them with it. “Mom should be back soon.” 

 

“Do you think of her as ‘mom’ completely now? Or do you still think of her as Miss Honey?” 

 

“She’s my mom.” Matilda said. “I stopped thinking of Harry and Zinnia as my parents a while ago. When she took me to the lake the first time, she had me throw rocks with their pictures on them. It helped me put them in the past.” 

 

“I can’t do that to my mom. I can’t just replace her.  I don’t know what to think of Jenny as. She’s not just Miss Honey anymore, but…

 

“What about a big sister? You guys sure fight like your sisters, and you can have more than one, so you’re not replacing anyone.” 

 

“My sister? We’re not anywhere close to the same age. She’s like 40.” 

 

“Pfft, i’m telling her you said that.”

 

“How old is she then?”

 

“Twenty-four.” 

 

“Really? That’s it?” Hortensia said, surprised. “She looks so much older. I mean, she has gray hair on the side of her head.”

 

“She’s had a hard life.” Matilda said. “And don’t say anything about the gray hair, I think she’s sensitive about it. She pulls them out.” 

 

“She missed a few.” 

 

“Missed a few, what?” Both girls jumped. Hortensia looked up to find Jenny standing in the doorway, holding a game of Pictionary. It was Hortensia’s favorite. She was excited at first, but then Hortensia noticed the look on her face. She looked very tired. She didn’t look like she’d be up to playing a game.

 

“Hi, mom! How did your appointment go?” Matilda asked, before crawling across the bed towards her. Jenny pursed her lips before smiling, but Hortensia noticed the smile didn’t reach her eyes, which were red and puffy like she had been crying. 

 

“Uh, well, “ she sighed. “Looks like you won’t be having a new sibling.” 

 

“What? Why? Was the test wrong?” 

 

“It was correct,” Jenny seemed to shuffle a bit. “But the fetus was non viable.” 

 

Hortensia wasn’t sure she knew what that meant, but the way she was talking about it made her sad. Jenny had always called it her “baby”; she had never referred to it as a “fetus”. Matilda ran up to her and gave her a hug. 

“I’m so sorry, mom.” 

 

“Thanks, sweetheart.” Hortensia watched awkwardly as they hugged. After a few moments, they broke apart. She could see tears on Jenny’s face. “Matilda, would you mind going to the cafeteria and hanging out there for a bit? I need to talk to Hortensia privately.” Matilda protested, but after fishing some money out of her purse and filling her head with the idea of a hot chocolate, Matilda went. 

 

Hortensia shuffled awkwardly in place. She knew what this was about. Her mouth went dry, 

 

“How was Matilda today? Did she drive you nuts?” Hortensia shook her head. 

 

“It helped, having her here. I felt safer.” It felt funny, admitting she felt safer having a little kid with her, but she did. “I did a bunch of schoolwork. Three days worth!” Jenny’s lips turned slightly into a smile. 

 

“Don’t feel like you need to worry about school right now. Your health takes priority. I know how Matilda can be, she puts school above everything else.”

 

“I don’t want to get held back!” Jenny was silent for a moment.

 

“It’s not the end of the world if you do; It doesn’t mean you're dumb.”

 

“I really really don't want to get held back.” Hortensia said. “Can Matilda stay with me again? I get a lot done with her here.”

 

“Is she doing the work for you?” 

 

“No, she’s just walking me through it.” 

 

“Can I see what you did?” Hortensia pointed to her backpack. Jenny opened it and looked through her books, checking for Matilda’s neat handwriting. When she found only Hortensia’s chicken scratch, she smiled. “You worked hard today.” 

 

“My wrist aches. She was annoyed because I kept having to wee every twenty minutes, but yeah…” she shrugged. 

 

“Would it make you feel better if I got you back into a set schedule for school?” Hortensia nodded. She looked through her books a moment longer before coming to an agreement. “I can plan out a week in advance. If you want to catch up, it might include doing work on the weekends, but this way, if you’re too ill on a certain day, you have extra days.” Hortensia agreed, and together they worked out a plan. When talk of school was over, Jenny placed the game on Hortensia’s tray.

 

“Would you like to play a few rounds?” 

 

“Don’t we need another person?” Hortensia asked.

 

“No, we can do this with just the two of us. The score won’t matter.” 

 

Hortensia snickered. It was an animal…she thought. A cow? Or a dog? She wasn’t sure what Jenny was trying to draw. Finally, she held up the picture. 

 

“A donkey?”

 

“No.”

 

“A cat?” Jenny looked at the picture and gave her a questioning look. “I don’t know, I think it’s an animal of…some kind.” An animal that probably needed to be put down. 

 

“Time’s up, it’s a horse.” Jenny said.

 

“How is that a horse?” Hortensia laughed. She picked up a pencil and quickly drew a sketch. “This is a horse.” 

 

“Show off.” Jenny said with a grin. They played a few more rounds before Jenny began to draw, but this time she wasn’t going off a prompt. Hotensia watched her curiously for a moment. Jenny finished and slid the paper over to her. She stared at it. A knot began to form in her stomach. It was a crude drawing of a stick figure girl with large square underwear, her stick arms on her front and a question mark. 

 

“I don’t get it.” Hortensia lied. Jenny circled the question mark. She felt her eyes begin to burn. 

 

“Are you?” 

 

“No.” Hortensia mumbled. 

 

“Please be honest with me. You’re not in trouble, but the nurses have seen you doing this several times and are concerned. I’m concerned.” 

 

“I like the way it feels.” Jenny was quiet for a moment. 

 

“I’m not going to tell you not to do it. I was very young when I started masturbating as well, but there’s a time and place. The hospital isn’t that place.” 

 

“What’s…that?”

 

“The place? Alone in your bedroom, or the bathroom. Not where people can walk in on you or see you as they’re walking by.”

 

“No, I mean, what’s masturbation?” Hortensia asked softly. She had heard the word before, but an adult had never discussed it with her. Susan had been angry with her, told her she was being “innapropriate”, but never said what exactly she was doing that was “inappropriate.” 

 

“It’s when you stimulate your genitals. Like you said, it feels good.” 

 

“But I wasn’t doing that.” Hortensia said. 

 

“Multiple nurses have seen you rubbing yourself.” Jenny said softly. 

 

“I wasn’t rubbing myself, I was rubbing the nappy. I like the sound, and I like…” she was silent for a moment. She couldn’t express this with words. She picked up the pencil and began to draw. She drew hands feeling the material along with a thought bubble of chains and a heavy lock. “It makes me feel…I can’t explain it. It makes me feel like nothing can get to me. No one can hurt me. I know you can easily tear it off, but…” Jenny seemed to smile at her for real this time. 

 

“It’s alright, I understand. This isn’t sexual.” Hortensia nodded. 

 

“Dr. Reinfield told me when I get all panicky to find something in the outside world and focus on it.”

 

“Yes, grounding, she’s helped me do the same.” 

 

“So I focus on the sound and feel of it. And I think of a time before all of this.”

 

“What do you think about? Is it a happy memory?” Hortensia nodded. Since Matilda had blasted her, (Matilda’s words, not hers) things were coming to the surface, both good and bad. A memory had drifted to the surface of an older girl reading to her. 

 

“I don’t remember where I was, but I was really little. I must have been, cause I was in nappies, but I remember I was already potty trained though. There was this older girl who said I was like a little sister to her. It made me happy cause I had wanted a big sister. She was reading to me and teaching me how and-” Jenny seemed to chuckle. “What?” 

 

“That was me.” Jenny said. Hortensia fought to remember, but she couldn’t picture the older girl’s face, only how the older girl made her feel. “Miss Trunchbull had locked us all in my room. You were keeping me company and helping to keep my mind off the pain I was in.”

 

“That was you?” 

 

“It was.” 

 

They were quiet for a moment, each of them lost in their own heads. 

 

“I already have a mom…”

 

“I know sweetheart, and I’m not trying to replace her.”

 

“Would it be okay if I thought of you as my big sister instead?” Hortensia asked, her voice soft and timid. 

 

“You absolutely can think of me as your big sister.” Jenny said with the first real smile she had seen. “I think that’s a great idea.”

 

“You do? Is it because we fight so much?” Hortensia laughed. 

 

“No, well, the thing about that is.” Jenny said. “Even though we don’t always get along, I love you, and I want what’s best for you. And the great thing about sisters is, they're perfect for talking about things you aren’t comfortable talking with your own mom about.” 

 

“Like secrets?” Jenny frowned for a moment.

 

“A safe adult will never ask you to keep a secret.” 

 

“He did.” Hortensia sighed. “I feel so stupid.”

 

“You are not stupid.”

 

“Matilda wouldn’t have gotten into this situation.” she mumbled. 

 

“You needed a friend and he took advantage of that. It’s his fault. The blame is entirely on him. Not you. Him. You are innocent. No matter what people say. No matter what you tell yourself. You did nothing wrong.” Hortensia felt her eyes begin to tear up.

 

“When will it stop?”

 

“When will what stop?”

 

“When will it stop hurting?” Hortensia cried. 

 

“With time, baby girl.” Jenny said softly and held her against her chest. “With time.”

 

[BabySofia]

😭 I'm not crying... 

I love the closure you have given the two of them with this acceptance of what happened in the room. Hopefully they get her infection and diabetic issues in hand. The diapers being a comfort item will be a bit of an oddity, but hopefully they accept it. I'm curious just how much she'll slip down that road. It would be nice to see Matilda join her a bit with that again!

On that front though I'm definitely worried about the poor girl, something is definitely not right for her! 

[CDfm]

This was an amazing chapter.  So much to love about it.  I especially loved how you managed to unite Hortensia and Jenny in this chapter.  Even Hortensia’s desire for diapers as a safety and security mechanism was awesome. There were also so many innocent comments that just had me rolling in laughter. 
Awesome job.  Can’t wait to read more. 

[SashaButters]

20 hours ago, BabySofia said:

😭 I'm not crying... 

I love the closure you have given the two of them with this acceptance of what happened in the room. Hopefully they get her infection and diabetic issues in hand. The diapers being a comfort item will be a bit of an oddity, but hopefully they accept it. 

And I wasn't crying writing it... *cough* 

I know it's an over played trope, but hopefully there's enough going on the story to make it original. There was a story on here at one point called "Lily the Liar" and the author took the daycare trope, but did an amazing job with it. 

17 hours ago, CDfm said:

This was an amazing chapter.  So much to love about it.  I especially loved how you managed to unite Hortensia and Jenny in this chapter.  Even Hortensia’s desire for diapers as a safety and security mechanism was awesome. There were also so many innocent comments that just had me rolling in laughter. 
Awesome job.  Can’t wait to read more. 

You always comment and I appreciate it so much! Thank you!