diaperpt Posted January 20, 2021 Share Posted January 20, 2021 I love how you have Ellie concerned that she's not just like her big sister rather than simply her own Little self, as I'd guess true younger sister might feel. I'm sad though that Kylie is worried that she isn't being a proper older sister. I guess I feel Ellie's concerns are cute and more 'natural' while Kylie 'should' have more confidence. Both seem to be concerned I think because their relationship is getting more personal. Maybe it feels more comfortable for Ellie because in spite of her newly discovered feelings about her gender, her sexuality hasn't changed. On the other hand it seems Kylie's Little self can see Ellie as her Little sister but she still sees the adult El as a male, in conflict with her sense of sexuality, and there is still her paranoia about losing the relationship she has had with El. You've shown Ellie also wondering whether her confusion is trying to do "Little" right or try to do her gender right - both of which should not be concerns but she has to decide that on her own. The intersection of all levels of the concerns each is feeling makes for wonderful tension and leaves me as a reader worried for them. And regardless how they work out their different layers of relationship, I don't want to see either of them hurt. I haven't had quite as much concern for Marnie, but we now see she has some things to work out in being a Mommy as well and that leaves me hoping that she can remain happy as well. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 21, 2021 Author Share Posted January 21, 2021 On 1/19/2021 at 9:24 PM, diaperpt said: Both seem to be concerned I think because their relationship is getting more personal. Yeah, they've still got lots going on. Now that they are more open about their feelings and communicating, they can work on stuff a little more directly. Problems don't just go away when people start addressing them, but it opens a lot of doors. ❤️ Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 22, 2021 Author Share Posted January 22, 2021 Chapter Forty-Nine I was sucking softly on my pacifier when Ellie came back. I quickly handed her one of the trains and pointed to the station. I didn't bother trying to talk around my paci or even think to take it out. I was having fun! I crawled over to the station, flashing my padded butt carelessly, and put the train on the track by the station. I couldn't do this wrong, right? Perfect Little Girl? That's what the charm said. Did Kylie know about this? Would she be jealous? Well, I guess it didn't matter because I couldn't do wrong. We played quietly for a while, until Mommy was done with the dishes. Honestly, I barely even looked at Ellie because I was so entranced with my own narrative. The train had to make it to the mountains - which was on the other side of the room - before bedtime but there were people stopping trains on the bridge to rob them. My penchant for video games really paid off when it came to imaginative storytelling. Meanwhile, I was much about about the logistics involved here; this train had to make it to this stop before the next train came so that the first train could be clear of the tracks in time for the other train. People needed the trains to run on time because there was literally nothing in the world worse than running late! I could tell that we were in different worlds, and at the same time, I couldn't remember ever feeling so close to Kylie. I did have to pee though. When Ellie got up, I didn't really notice. I saw her move about, take a few steps on her feet, and I went back to the game I was playing. But the wonderful meal, the pacifier, and the late hours were beginning to catch up to me. My eyes felt a little heavy. Of course, Ellie's adventure to the bathroom didn't go quite as planned. It was locked. Marnie knew what it was like having a new Little in the house. "I think um..." I took the teat out of my mouth when I got to Marnie, because whispering with a binky between my lips was harder than I thought and I was trying not to draw attention. "I mean, what should I do, after I pee? Do I just take this off when I get into the bathroom and you'll come put a new one on me when I'm done on the toilet, or?" I didn't even mention the bathroom being locked; I just figured maybe Marnie kept it locked out of habit or something weird. Marnie had heard a lot of excuses about using diapers, but this one was new. Obvious obliviousness. Come on, Ellie. You're in a diaper! Use that little girl brain of yours. But maybe she was just too little, Marnie smiled to herself. Maybe this could be fun! "Bathroom?" Marnie asked, trying to hide her smile. "What do you need in there? You can wash your hands in the kitchen sink." Notably, the dishes were mostly clean. Marnie had a video playing on her phone, propped up on the counter. Something to do with cooking. "Oh, uh," Hmm, this was going to be trickier than I first thought. Deep breath, Ellie, you got this! "I need to use the um, the facilities? I need to pee, you know? I drank the milk and I was a good girl, but now my bladder's all full sooo..." Marnie stood there, waiting for her to go on. But she didn't go on. She thought Marnie would understand. Of course Marnie understood. But two could play at obliviousness. "And?" "Well, I couldn't get the door to open…" Marnie nodded, understanding the story so far. "Yes, that's right. And?" I rubbed my thighs together under the hem of the dress and took a deep breath - clearly, Marnie wasn't getting it, and that was fine. I'd have to be direct! "I need to get into the bathroom to pee. In the toilet." "Oh." Marnie's fake realization was on point. "Well, that's a silly thought for a little girl to have, don't you think? Why else would you be in a diaper but to use it?" Kylie had told Ellie once before that Marnie wouldn't let her use the bathroom, but that had been very late at night. Perhaps he didn't understand the context. But now Marnie was putting it in perspective. "...gloomy." I sighed, thinking about just how uncomfortable I would be sitting in my own pee. I didn't like the idea of that at all, not one bit and not for one second. Marnie wasted no time popping the pacifier back between Ellie's lips and tapping the little magic charm, causing it to gently spin. "Ellie doesn't worry about things, right? Ellie is a perfect little girl. And that means using her diapers is the perfect thing to do, right?" Ellie pouted and pulled the pacifier from her lips. "Then using the bathroom is just as perfect, right?" "Well," Marnie said thoughtfully, "since the door is locked, you'd have to ask me to unlock it. And to ask, you have to take the pacifier out. Thus, asking wouldn't be a perfect little girl behavior, hm?" Marnie smiled warmly as Ellie stared dumbfounded. The magic charm had worked wonders on Kylie in part because it gave her a Get Out Of Jail Free card. The other part was because Marnie made the rules. This wasn't her first battle of wits over using the bathroom. Thoughtfully, I went to the refrigerator, and I began to spell out the magnet letters in a very clear message, with the binkie between my lips still. The letters read: "Open. The bathroom. Stop having it. Be closed." I had to use a few 2's in there, and some 0's, but the message was clear. Marnie looked at the fridge with a bit of surprise. Huh. She didn't expect that. But it was easy to brush off. "Oh you did such a good job, princess! When you're a bit older, maybe you'll know how to spell some actual words, hm? But it was a very good try for someone your age." Marnie watched a bit of embarrassment color Ellie's cheeks; Marnie's diminutive talk was always on point. "How about you go play with your sister now, hm? Mommy has some things to do." I furrowed my brow, and whined and mumbled, just for a second, just long enough to frustrate me enough to take out the pacifier again. "I can't do that, I'm a cleanly girl.." "Mommy knows best," Marnie said simply. And that may have worked with Kylie after months and months of practice, but she knew Ellie wouldn't take it lying down. With a sigh, she decided to break character a little. "Listen," Marnie said with a tone halfway between condescending and genuine. "I know it's weird. And I know it's a little gross. Ky didn't like it either - it was a big hurdle. But when you get used to it, you'll see how freeing it is. Potty training is one of the first things that binds you to responsibility, and giving that up means giving up responsibility all together. It means not worrying. It means not needing a magic charm to keep you safe." Marnie nodded toward Ellie's pacifier. "And though it doesn't matter as much, diapers are also one of my favorite parts of taking care of a Little. Changing you and Kylie is intimate and special and unique and... so unordinary. Something just for me. I understand if you don't understand. I'm only asking that you give it a chance." "You're asking me to wet my pants, which is something I've literally spent my whole life being told not to do," I frowned. And sighed. "But I guess I spent my whole life being told I had to be a boy too, so..." Marnie's eyes lit up at the comparison. She had never thought much about it, but Ellie made a wonderful point. "When you're my little princess," Marnie tilted her tone back toward caregiving, "you don't listen to what other people say. No rules of society, no rules of your own. Just Mommy's rules. And you know my rules are only there to help you, right? Just like when we played dress up that very first time." Marnie was direct about her stake in all this. Yes, she liked diapers. But if she thought they would be at all detrimental to Ellie or Kylie, she would never insist. "And you'll change me right after?" Not 'can I change?' but 'will you change me?" because she made it pretty clear that she got something out of this, and the least I felt I could do would be to play ball with her. Marnie hated to waste a diaper, and the kind Ellie was wearing could hold much more than a single wetting! But, well... if Ellie didn't break down in tears and have a panic attack, it would be better than Kylie's first time. Kylie probably needed a change anyway; that chocolate milk always went right through her. "Of course. I'll get you ready for bed as soon as you need changing. Now go play with your sister - she's probably wondering where you are." She wouldn't be, because she was still playing with her trains. But Marnie had left an impression on me, and she'd given me pause to think about all of this. About rules - how social rules were awful, but how hers were special. I needed to listen to her. I needed to put my money where my mouth was and put my pee where my diaper was. So I knelt down to build more track, I faced away from Kylie, and I did everything I could to pee. Which... wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Or as gross. But it caught me by surprise and I squealed and fell backward onto my butt. ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 5 Link to comment
diaperpt Posted January 23, 2021 Share Posted January 23, 2021 8 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: I squealed and fell backward onto my butt. Now there's a perfect little girl! I know she's not going to be very happy about wetting, but she's starting to buy into Mommy rules. I'm sure it will take time, but this is progress. Link to comment
YourFNF Posted January 23, 2021 Share Posted January 23, 2021 Little Ellie is so cute! XD Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 23, 2021 Author Share Posted January 23, 2021 Chapter Fifty I looked up from the trains at Ellie. She was so cute, sitting on her bum with her legs spread. If I paid enough attention, I could see the diaper under her dress. But something else caught my eye; the little disk hanging off her pacifier. I hadn't used that thing in forever, but it had helped me a lot back in the day. Marnie had it made for me from some Etsy shop. She only put it on my pacifier when I was worried I would do something wrong. Did Ellie think she was doing something wrong? I pulled the pacifier from my lips and crawled over to Ellie, who continued to suck on hers. I took her hand in mine and smiled brightly. "Everything is okay," I assured her. "Lets play trains, okay? I gotta get this one to the station on time." I put the small wooden train in her hand. "Nuhuh. Not moving." I shook my head in absolute certainty, refusing to look at her. I'd wet myself, like a baby. In a diaper, like a baby. Not on accident, but on purpose, and I didn't know if that was better or if that was worse! But the world didn't end - maybe if I moved, though, it might. I certainly felt like if I moved, I'd just gush a tidal wave of pee all over the floor though. Ack. Gross. I couldn't fully understand her around her pacifier, but so she definitely was anxious. Nervous about something. But that's what Littlespace was for. So I pulled on her wrist and forced the wooden train into her hand. "Come ooooonnnnn! You're gonna make it laaaaaate!" "Nuhuh there's been a flood, no more trains are running." I shook my head and wriggled my fingers, trying to squirm away, maybe out of her grasp, maybe out of reality, I didn't know. I took the binky out and shouted as loud as I could. "Mommy!" Mommy was quick to come into the room, and I sat blankly on the floor. Why was Ellie upset? I didn't understand? Did I do something wrong? But when Mommy saw the worry on my face, she shook her head. "It's okay Smylie. You know how babies cry over silly things." But despite her reassurances, I wasn't sure I'd ever heard Ellie talk so loudly in her life... "Come on, Ellie. Let's have a talk, okay?" Mommy leaned down to help Ellie up off the floor. She had a surprising amount of strength, even for her height. It was easy to get the little girl onto her feet. "I did it, I did it, I did it, now you do it, you do it, you do it, you do the thing you said you'd do if I did the thing you wanted me to do." My words were running together, and even the momentary pause to stand up didn't really slow them down or make them any clearer. But to my relief, at least, there was no puddle on the floor. Mommy led Ellie down the hall toward my room, but the anxiety was building in my chest. I wanted her to be okay. I felt like I did something wrong. But Littlespace was strong enough to prevent an all out panic attack. I got to my feet and tip toed down the hall, trying to hear what was going on. "Shh, you're a good girl, such a good girl for Mommy..." Marnie had slid her hand up the back of Ellie's dress as they walked up the hall and felt the seat of her diaper. She was definitely wet, but not enough to be a worry. Once Marnie and Ellie were inside the spare room, Marnie sat down on the bed and pulled her little girl onto her lap. She held her tight and cooed softly, like she had once before in the bathroom. Marnie slid the pacifier between her lips. "Look at you, perfect little girl. You did everything right. Suck for me and calm down, okay princess?" I winced when she sat me back down, because I was sure there was going to be a gushing fountain of wetness soaking her lap when she did that, but once again I was left relieved and only basically reminded of what I'd done by the warm squishing of the diaper. I didn't think I liked this very much, but the binky seemed to help... probably because she said it ought to. "That's a good girl..." Marnie was nearly whispering to Ellie. The fact that she hadn't taken the pacifier out of her mouth and even started to calm down some boded well. "I'm going to tell you some truths," Marnie said gently. "You should accept them, because society is often wrong and Mommy is often right. Okay?" She waited for her to nod, still rocking and rubbing her back. Why wasn't she changing me? I'd been good, I'd done what she said. Why wasn't she changing me? She wanted to talk? Okay. She could talk. Maybe while getting me out of my pee soaked undergarments? "You're a good girl. A wonderful girl. A perfect girl. You did what Mommy said. You make me so happy. Diapers are meant for this. You did what you were supposed to do. You gave up your responsibility to your Mommy. You stopped listening to the world and started listening to yourself. You didn't get anything wet. You didn't leak. If you did, that's not wrong. That's Mommy's fault for not changing you sooner or diapering you better. You can't do it wrong. You aren't gross. You aren't icky. You are exactly as you should be. You are adorable. You make my heart sing. You give me butterflies." Mommy spoke in soft tones. I stood outside the door, catching every other word. I remembered this speech, or something like it. Back then, I thought it was stupid. They were clearly lies. Even if they helped in the moment, I never thought she was telling me the truth. But she was... Tears dripped down my cheeks and I headed back to the living room. This was Ellie's moment. Even if she didn't know it now, she needed it. There was a lot on my mind, when there ought to have been nothing. The implications of this, that Marnie expected this, that Kylie had been doing this for a while, that within these four walls it was the most normal thing in the world and that my whole understanding of normality was pretty much moot anyway by this point. I didn't register a lot of what Marnie said consciously, but it all hit at a deeper level anyway. This was a normal she expected. This was a normal she preferred, that she got fulfillment from. Whether or not I got anything out of it didn't matter, because she bent over backwards to take care of me, and of Kylie, and if all she wanted in return was a freshly-minted girl to pee her pants every now and then, that only seemed fair. Well... as long as it wasn't my literal pants. Those were expensive. "Change now?" Ellie was doing a lot better. Her voice was quieter and her eyes were softer. Some of that anxiety and panic had gone away. Marnie smiled happily and nodded. "Of course, princess." Marnie knew that the first time someone wet a diaper it was an unpleasant experience. It was scary and new. She couldn't control that. But she could control the part that followed. She knew how to perfectly change a diaper. Exactly what to comment on: the cuteness of the little girl on the blankets, the fresh smell of new baby powder, and the soft dry diaper as it crinkled under her bottom. Every single thing Ellie hated about a wet diaper, Marnie would help her love the opposite in a dry one. And one day, if Ellie ever found herself liking the wetting part, Marnie had words for that too. "All done!" Marnie cheered, patting the front of Ellie's diaper. "Nice and dry, and you smell so sweet. Should we get you some pajamas, too? It's almost bedtime." "Uhhuh, please." I would have asked her not to tell Kylie, but if Kylie hadn't figured it out by now, she'd know next time it happened anyway, so what was the point? The world didn't end, I was still the same girl I'd always been, and now I got to smell like fresh baby powder and wear cute pajamas. It was... kinda nice to be spoiled. To feel loved. ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 5 Link to comment
diaperpt Posted January 24, 2021 Share Posted January 24, 2021 And the cuteness just continues! Link to comment
YourFNF Posted January 24, 2021 Share Posted January 24, 2021 Marnie is such a good mommy! *squee* Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 24, 2021 Author Share Posted January 24, 2021 3 hours ago, YourFNF said: Marnie is such a good mommy! *squee* She sure is!! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 24, 2021 Author Share Posted January 24, 2021 Chapter Fifty-One Ellie and Marnie reappeared in the living room ten minutes later. Ellie was wearing a yellow pajama set with cartoon bees on it; a frilly cotton top and puffy shorts that hid her diaper. The pacifier was reattached to her shirt, with the little magic charm hanging off it. Ellie looked worn out; I bet she would sleep well tonight. "C'mon Smylie. Let's get you ready for bed too. Then you and Ellie can clean up your trains." Ellie and I traded seats and I took Marnie's hand as we went back into my bedroom. "Is she doing okay?" Marnie would know instantly by my voice that I wasn't feeling very little right now. But I wasn't upset either. I think I was just a little worried about my best friend. "I saw the paci charm." "She's more okay than you were, the first time you wet your diaper." Marnie didn't see any reason to not be frank about this, because it was what it was - something that was going to become routine. Heck, Kylie knew more than anybody just how easy it was for this stuff to slip into being a new norm. I nodded and sat down on the edge of the bed. The diaper between my legs had grown a little clammy in the past hour or so, and I knew I'd be changed into another. I learned a long time ago that I'd stay dry longer if I wet before changing. So while Marnie went through the dresser to find me some pajamas, I quietly took a deep breath and tried to relax. A month ago, it would have been impossible. I would have had to take five minutes just to build up to it! But now, the feeling was almost natural. The heat spread across my bottom and soaked into the diaper, making it warm again. Sometimes I wondered if Marnie would take longer to change me, just so I had time to go again. If she did, she would never admit it. "Do you think she likes it? Being little? Or is it just like... to make me feel more comfortable?" "Well, that's hard to say - once upon a time we would have said that you only did it to make me comfortable, isn't that right? And yet here we find ourselves, little miss, and I'd say you really genuinely rely upon these precious moments of joy and innocence." Marnie had picked out pixie pajamas, tonight; plain and simple and comfortable, the furthest thing from performative. "The reasons why we enjoy things changes every time we do them." "I suppose that's true..." I shifted awkwardly in the frilly, heavy, obtrusive dress. The pajamas Marnie picked out looked so light and comfortable. I had never been so eager to be changed out of clothes before! She got a new diaper from the dresser - a colorful one with ponies - and set everything down on the bed next to me. Without waiting for her to ask, I lifted my arms so she could undress me. "Hey, um..." I wasn't even sure how to bring it up... Marnie lifted the dress above her little ones head, one smooth motion, and pulled down the bundles of petticoats from around her waist with a ruffly whoosh of taffeta. Just as smoothly her finger slid into the leg gather of the diaper, as if she didn't already know how wet Kylie was, and she hummed in assessment. "Alrighty, up onto the bed." I shuffled back a little bit and laid down on the bed. I knew the optimal spot to lay at this point, just close enough to the end of the bed that I could put my feet on the edge to prop up my butt. Marnie had raised my legs once or twice by the ankles, but she really only did so when I was acting out. "Um. I wanna say I'm sorry. For, uh. Pushing you away and stuff. I know I made things hard on you... I didn't need to do that..." "Nobody's perfect, Kylie; for some reason we all just tend to hurt the ones we love and we never mean it, not really. But it happens anyway - it's no big deal." Her words sounded a little distracted, yes, but she was balancing an emotionally broad answer with changing an adult baby girl’s diaper. "It is a big deal," I said sourly, looking up at the ceiling. Marnie untaped the diaper and a rush of cold air made me shiver. I knew she was just trying to brush it under the rug, but I wanted to talk about it! I wanted to talk about feelings. Wasn't that like... important or something? I puffed out my cheeks in annoyance. "You were trying to help me and I was a jerk. You make me feel things that I... I'm not sure what to do with. So I got scared. And I wasn't... I didn't want..." Why was this so hard? "You didn't want?" Marnie shifted to tender tone, encouraging words. "Use your words, honey. I know these are big feelings, but you're doing great." A cold wipe brought another shiver up my spine and I sunk shyly into the bed. Oddly enough, I was used to this: being naked in front of Marnie, letting her wipe me clean after wetting myself, and then changing me into a new diaper. What I wasn't used to was talking about how I felt. That was the weird part. "I didn't want to play this stupid game. Pretending to be a little girl, 'cause that's what you wanted. I resented you a little bit for forcing this stuff on me." Truthfully, Marnie wasn't perfect either. The start of our relationship was more like a business transaction. She would help me manage my anxiety, and in return I'd play baby in her fucked up game of house. She would set rules that I hated. Go to bed before midnight. Don't eat certain foods. It was all to "help with my anxiety". And maybe it was, but a part of me always knew she was being selfish. It was just more ways she could 'mommy' me. But over time, she learned. She gave me more freedom. She let me come to her when I needed her. She stopped calling me every few hours and she stopped showing up at my place uninvited. She got to know me, and what worked for me, and she put me first. She let me do it my way. I never let her have things her way. I never played any further into her games than I had to. I would sneak off to the toilet in the middle of the night. When she started locking the door, I would leave and go home without saying goodbye. But when I got used to it, I really didn't mind so much. And she was right - it helped. In three months, Marnie had stopped caring about what she wanted. Our business transactions were always one-sided. I only played by her rules because a part of me had started to enjoy them. I never gave anything back. I never really trusted her or cared about her. I never wanted to. I thought if I could hate her, I'd never have to be left alone again. I could keep myself safe. But safety was slipping away. My best friend was a girl now. I wore diapers for fun. Even my bras were different. And despite all that, the one person who deserved to get what she wanted was the one person for who I refused to change. I took a deep breath and tried again to explain what I was talking about. "You make me feel safe. Different, but safe. And being around you, I feel this... this feeling. Not like I want to kiss you or sleep with you or marry you, but this feeling of..." Love? Love was too romantic. Admiration? Too platonic. There was something else. Something different. Something no one but her could understand. What was that word she used with Ellie? "Butterflies." That was it. My eyes started to water, but I was determined not to cry. "I'm sorry for everything, but... but I wanna make it up to you. I wanna be in this now. With you. Please." There was a lot to unpack - a lot of ‘this’ leads to ‘that’ - and Marnie realized that the train in her head had left without her. It didn’t matter what it all meant; the only thing that mattered was that moment. "I'm so happy to hear that, Smylie - you really lived up to your name, because I'm not sure I'm ever going to stop smiling after that.” I rolled my eyes and looked away. I wasn't sure what would be different. Maybe nothing at all. But I guess... well, she was my Mommy now, if I was feeling little or not. And I was her little girl. Somehow, that thought made me smile. "Can I please get changed now?" I said with a mock huff. "I'm cold!" "Oh, don't be fussy ~ I'll change you and you'll be warm again in no time, soggy princess." Marnie smirked and tickled up her little girl’s sides before she had a chance to argue. And Kylie was one heck of a ticklish girl, that was for sure! Where did things go from here? Would things be different? Maybe she'd actually have an ally in her project with Ellie, which would be nice. Maybe things would be easier now. For the first time, they felt easier. * * * * * Emotional talk really took a lot out of me, it seemed. And Ellie's first wetting had taken a lot out of her too. Mommy suggested we watch a movie and the both of us agreed, Ellie in her cute bee pajamas and me in fairy ones. Mommy made us each a fresh bottle and let us lay with our heads on her lap. I thought I could make it through the movie, but I drifted off before the bottle was even empty. I stirred when Mommy picked me up. I looked around the empty living room - two bottles on the floor and no Ellie. I sleepily rubbed my eyes as Mommy took me to my room and laid me down in bed. Ellie was already in it, curled up to a pillow with half-closed eyes. "Hey you." I didn't know why I pretended to be asleep until Marnie had left the room, but it was probably because I was feeling vulnerable and more than a little overwhelmed after the night's crescendo. Not to mention, it had been a very stressful few weeks. Or maybe I just missed my best friend, and I cherished the chance at some time alone with her. "Hi," I muttered, sinking into the bed. I pulled the blankets tight around me and rubbed the sleep from my eyes. Nonetheless, I couldn't shake the heavy feeling in my head. I was so tired... "I had fun today," I said with a smile. My voice was somewhere between grown-up Kylie and little-girl Kylie. I felt that way a little bit, trapped in an in-between state. I wasn't complaining. "How are you?" "I peed my pants," I muttered casually, like that confession was the most ordinary thing in the world. And I didn't know why I was telling her that, maybe to make her smile or laugh? I so often made myself the target of her jokes. "It gets easier," I said quietly. "My first time was weird too. I didn't take it so well." I was fine at first. Determined to play the game. Determined to be whatever Marnie wanted so she could be whatever I wanted. It was just pissing myself, right? But it took over an hour to make it happen. Then, after it did, I fell apart. I didn't even know why. "It's weird hearing her make a case for it, like it's all about this big grand benefit, some big picture only she can see. But at the end of the day, I'm still a grown up girl who peed her pants. Diapers are weird. But nice, I guess? I don't know. I think I'm babbling." "I thought that way too," I mumbled, remembering all the cynical ways I used to think about Marnie. "You think it's just for her, like she is demanding payment or something. But I think she really cares about us. Even if it comes across in weird ways." "I mean, she's the reason I was able to come to the conclusion I'm a girl, so I think I went into this whole baby thing with a more positive vibe about her. But you're right... you're right, you know? I was so jealous of her at first. I figured you two were just going to inevitably start dating and then I'd be boring ol' El, left to his... her, own devices. This is the first time in my life I don't feel like three's a crowd." "Yeah..." I thought about it myself. I never wanted Ellie here in the first place. I didn't even want her and Mommy to meet. And now look at us. "Well, I'm glad you're here. Even if it's weird. It's nice too. I like having a sister..." "I like having a sister, too." We were both quiet for a little bit, just a few seconds, but it felt like a whole bunch longer. I was the one to break the weirdly drawn out silence. "I liked kissing you. It was nice." I nodded. It was nice. But the memory of last time we were in almost this exact situation brought a pang of anxiety to my chest. The first kiss. And then earlier tonight too, because my Little self seemed to have a bit less self-preservation. I started to fill with worry. "I'm gonna go to sleep now," I said with a quiet smile, then rolled onto my side to face away from her. I was never someone to face conflict head on; I'd run, I'd hide, I'd pretend. I was really good at sweeping it all under the rug and letting sleeping dogs lie. But I guess I'd never been one to be a girl either, or a baby, or a baby girl. So I defied my instincts, and put my arm over her, hugging her from behind. "I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable, I didn't realize I'd be bringing up anxious thoughts." Because it was very obvious in her tone. Maybe I should talk to her. Maybe I should tell her everything I was feeling. But it felt too big and too knotted, like a box of Christmas lights. And I was so tired. So I let her hug me around the stomach and hold me close. Honestly, I think I made the right choice; rather than having a panic attack, I fell asleep in her arms. ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 3 Link to comment
diaperpt Posted January 25, 2021 Share Posted January 25, 2021 What a cute ending to the chapter! Both baby girls are trying to be different; be better. Kylie likes the idea of kissing but is afraid of what might happen so that piece doesn't change yet. I wonder how long it will be. Ellie likes her too much to push it. But, I wonder... Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 26, 2021 Author Share Posted January 26, 2021 Chapter Fifty-Two "So, does Noland know?" "Know?" "About being a girl. Did you tell him yet?" Ellie and I were dressed in our usual clothes. Or rather, I was dressed in my usual clothes and she was wearing a skirt and a blouse that she borrowed from my closet in Marnie's house. Her makeup had been re-done and her hair was fluffed and beautiful. The lip gloss on her lips left prints on her mug of cocoa. Mommy had changed us early in the morning back into panties - funnily enough, I think Ellie and I were wearing the same kind from that store Caroline showed me. I kept thinking about it. Ellie in her panties... kinda sexy. But now Ellie and I were alone in Marnie's apartment. She had work. I had a key and I would lock up behind us when we left. "I don't think so? Maybe? I mean, I think he probably already knew, but he's also self-righteous enough that he probably wouldn't have ever assumed." Which, to put it more simply, was to say; "I don't think he'll be surprised." I nodded and sipped my coffee. I didn't like coffee, but it was all Mommy had in the house that would wake me up. "Do you want me to be there? It might be easier with a friend. Though I don't think he'll care." Noland was a socially conscious kind of guy; he had always been that way. "I don't know, maybe? I think logically he's just gonna be like 'okay cool’, and it will be a three second conversation. But I also figured it'd be like that..." With you too, that's what I was going to say. But I bit my damn tongue, because that would have been bitchy. "How about I go anyway?" Truth be told, I wanted to go. I hadn't been the most supportive person at the start of all this, and I wanted Ellie to know that I didn't care if she was different. She was always my best friend, no matter what. "What about your parents? Do you think you'll want to tell them?" "I mean, I guess it's better that I tell them before they find out in some weird viral online video or something," I smiled coyly, but she sighed with her eyes alone. I nodded having got the message loud and clear. "Yeah, I know, I should tell them. They won’t believe me." "I'll be there for that too." Truth be told, Ellie's parents weren't that bad. Way better than my parents, anyway. They let me crash at her place when we were kids when most parents would be like "gender this, gender that". Maybe they knew what a bitch my mom was. But they were also very... ordinary. Something like this would come as a surprise. It was something to be worried about. "Let's work our way up, okay? Noland first. Are you wearing that out? I think it looks really good." "Yeah? You think so?" I was never doubtful of my fashion choices, but I felt like I was starting all over from the beginning now. I had more than a little reservation when it came to putting together ensembles. "Absolutely! Way cuter than me, that's for sure." It wasn't hard to accomplish. I wore torn jeans and ten year old t-shirts. She could wear a burlap sack and still have more style than me. "And Marnie did amazing on your makeup. I swear, no one will mistake you for a boy." Hopefully. "I mean, I sound like a boy, and I move like a boy. So maybe if I just keep my mouth shut and hide behind you, there'll be no problem at all?" Wishful thinking, maybe. The voice thing was true enough. But there were tons of trans girls out there, right? They had to do something about it. And Ellie's voice wasn't exactly masculine. It just... wasn't that feminine either. Hmm... "I'll google it. Rinse out these cups for me and get your shoes on." "You're the boss." This was a world I really knew so little about - what was I supposed to sound like? How was I supposed to move? Maybe I was cute, but was I feminine? Was I cut out to do this, to be this? What about laughing? Sneezing? Coughing? I could put an outfit together, but could I sit like a girl? Gosh. I was in way over my head. * * * * * Ellie and I hit the drive through on the way toward her apartment. Then we sat in the parking lot on our phones flipping through YouTube videos on transgirl voice lessons. Ellie tried a few of them, but she didn't sound... great. Obviously this was something she would have to practice at. We looked up some other stuff about "how to be a girl" but a lot of it was subjective. Basically, be whoever you want. In my opinion, Ellie already had a leg up on that. She already did what she wanted, regardless of gender. Now she just had more freedom. Before we knew it, the sun was on its way down. Afternoon was slipping by. The ice in my soda had melted. How many videos had we watched in this car? "I've come up with a great and original idea that I'm sure nobody has ever thought of before, ever. I'll learn sign language, and be mute. Problem solved." I'd progressively notched the recline on the passenger seat further and further back as our pursuit of knowledge had borne progressively less and less fruit. "I'm all for sign language." It would be fun to talk in secret with someone else in the room. "But you shouldn't be so embarrassed. Girls and guys have a ton of different voices. I think with enough practice you'll find one you are happy with. Look here." I held up my phone. "Vocal chords are like muscles. Stop using one and it will atrophy. That means if you stop talking in a deep voice, eventually it won't happen on its own." Deep was relative, but whatever. "This sounds so tedious, Ky," I groaned, and then groaned again, because I was immediately aware of how boyish my groan was. Aurgh! This was stupid. Gender was stupid. I was stupid. "Then don't change your voice at all. Fuck what other people think." "But I want to sound different! Not for other people, but for me." "Then that takes practice. I could do it with you? I could try to use a different voice?" "I like your voice..." I sighed and leaned back in the chair. This really was harder than I thought it would be. Why wasn't there a pill for this? There was a pill for everything else. "Sorry it's hard," I muttered. "I'll do everything I can to make it easier." "I know, because you've always been there. I had nightmares, you know, at the idea of you not being here, because of this whole... me thing." I sighed, deep as could be. "Let's go home; I wanna tell Noland." * * * * * I wasn't worried about telling Noland. Honestly, there was no way he would do a worse job than I did when Ellie came out to me. But things got a little more complicated when we walked in and found Jen on the sofa. I didn't see her car outside, but I didn't look very hard either. Damnit. Jen looked up from her phone at Ellie, in her blouse and skirt, and stared for a minute. Like she was processing. Then she looked back down at her phone. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad, but I bet it made Ellie nervous. I took her hand for support and squeezed it. Things would be fine... right? "Nole's just down at the store getting some fancy-butts bread flour - I teased him last time he tried to make bread and he feels like he has some honor to defend. He should be home any minute tho." Jen didn't look up at all during that, although she did shuffle over on the sofa to allow sitting space for the new arrivals that we were. So I sat down next to her. It was almost like I'd have preferred the earth-shattering kaboom. I looked at Ellie curiously. Did she want to tell Jen? That wasn't the plan. But she'd figure it out sooner or later, right? Ellie shrugged her shoulders and we both took a seat on the sofa. This was so awkward... "So uh, Jen," I cleared my throat, because it felt like I had about a thousand bees making honey in there. "Hm?" She didn't look up. "I wanted to talk to you and Noland about a thing." "Yeah? A thing?" "A thing," I nodded. Was it warm in here? Gosh. "Do you wanna wait until Noland gets here?" I offered, more to Ellie than to Jen. Maybe if she only had to explain this once, it would be easier? I wondered what it would be like if I told my mom I was gay. That's when I realized how awful this really must be for Ellie! I would rather die. "Let's wait," I decided. "We could watch TV or something until then." "Sure, if you want. You can play The Sega if you wanna plug it in," Jen offered, sounding about as outdated as could be in her vague understanding and description of video games - they weren't really her thing, so nobody ever criticized her. Her sense of disinterest and distraction left me with a conflicted mixture of relieved and pouty, so I passed the remote to Kylie and put my faith in her to make me feel better. I put a show on Netflix; something Ellie and I had been watching. Jen didn't seem to mind - she was distracted by her phone. I hoped it was calming Ellie down a little, but I held her hand all the same. You know. Just in case. Noland turned up ten minutes later. He came in, saw Ellie and me, and started talking about dinner. "I didn't know you guys would be here but I'm making enough garlic bread for a small country so feel free to stick around." "Uh, so, Noland..." "Oh, right, no bread, huh? Can you have garlic butter? There's no calories in that, right?" I blinked, had a brief hard lock, and then recovered from the absolute stupidity of that comment, and shook my head. "Can you sit down? I wanna talk to you." And, I guess… "and Jen, about a thing." "Urgent talk?" Noland said with a touch of nervousness. He looked down at the bag in his hand; it was clear he wanted to start baking. But Noland was nothing if not accommodating. So he traded places with Ellie - between Jen and I - who got up in front of us wearing her cute skirt and blouse, makeup on point, and hair fluffed up with a headband. Honestly, other than her voice, I wasn't sure how Jen and Noland even recognized her! "So..." You got this, El, what's the big deal? You look great, you feel great, you're going to impress the heck out of them. So just say it already! "I'd like you to call me Ellie now. Uh. She and Her pronouns, please." I nodded, but Kylie turned her head at me and opened her eyes wide in equal parts encouragement and huffyness. Why did it matter what I said from here? Why did I have to say that? I know, I know, that's who I am, this is the truth of the matter, an- "So you're a girl?" I got freed out of my thought loop by Jen asking the question and Noland then reprimanded her. "If she says she's a girl, she's a girl, but she can be a boy with she/her pronouns, or she can be nonbinary, or genderfluid, or anything, you shouldn't assume." "Duh, boyfriend. I just wanted to clarify so we knew." "If Ellie wanted to tell us that, she'd tell us that." "Maybe she's having trouble finding the words?" I wasn't sure if them bickering was helpful or harmful. I felt like a deer in the headlights though. "Yeah, she's a girl," I interrupted. Best to put this whole debate to rest before it got out of hand. Though Noland and Jen both took to the she/her pronouns quite quickly. "Oh okay, that's a relief," Noland said with a laugh. "I was worried you wanted to move out or something. Sorry Ellie, but I can't afford this place without you right now!" This had to be the weirdest coming out I'd ever seen... "I'm not moving out..." I was baffled. Why? Because they didn't care? Of course they didn't care, they were my friends. It shouldn't matter one damn bit if I was a girl or a boy or queer or anything like that. I just... didn't expect that expectation to apply to reality. "Y'all are great people, you know that?" I mumbled, equal parts happy and deflated. "Yeah, and I'm gonna make great garlic bread. Come help me, because—" "Because women belong in the kitchen?" Jen teased. Noland went bug eyed and shook his head, waving his hands. "No no no! I just know that Ellie won't try to eat the cookie dough, unlike some ladies I know." I looked at Jen and we both shrugged our shoulders. He wasn't wrong. * * * * * Noland led the way into the kitchen with the bag of flour in hand. By the time Ellie got there, he was already mixing some ingredients. Now that the two of them were alone, Noland was a little less cavalier. "Hey. I'm proud of you, you know. For finding something that makes you happy and going for it. Honestly, it must be hard." "Being a girl isn't hard, it's the rebranding issue that sucks. Can you imagine how telling my parents is going to be? Some people, I can literally just picture how they'll take it. Caroline will clap and squeal and jump up and down. Michael at the tailors will be like '...you weren't a girl before? I'm confused,' but when it comes to my folks... I don't know, Noland." I thought about being a girl, about rebranding, about who I was, who I wanted to be. And so I did something very out of character for a boy who obsessed over expensive clothing - I put my hands on the counter behind me, and pulled myself up onto the countertop, scooting back and dangling my legs over the side. It was kind of freeing. "Identity is a tricky thing," Noland said without looking up from his recipe book. "It changes like... every day. Even if you don't realize it, it changes a little bit. And then there are the big things that mean so much to you that you don't want to let them go. So you hold onto those big things, so you have an idea of who you are, you know? But then sometimes holding onto those things makes it impossible to find the next thing, the thing that might define you even better than the thing you're holding onto." Noland seemed to be speaking from experience, but about what specifically was unknown. "Changing is good. Rebranding is good. If no one changed, they couldn't grow or become better. But people like to hold onto what they know. It's safe or comfortable or something. And then they think badly about people who have the courage to change, because they can't. And it's easy to hate things you can't do." I didn't have much to say, because Noland wasn't exactly a smart guy, but he was wise as heck. I was worried that anything I said to follow that up wouldn't match up to his poignancy. So I nodded, and I kicked my feet, and I waited for him to say something less brilliant. Which, being Noland, didn't take too long. "So does that mean you're dating Kylie now?" I blinked and quickly shook my head. "No no no no, it sure doesn't mean that." "Well, you weren't dating before because she likes girls. And you didn't think you were a girl. Turns out - surprise! - you are a girl. So it seems sort of... serendipitous." "Well, she would have to like me to date me." "She barely knows you!" Noland said - probably a little too loudly - and toned it down to a heavy whisper. "I mean, you were an Automatic No before, and now you aren't. Maybe the Automatic part was the only thing she had trouble with." "Right, but if I make some move on her now, she's going to think I'm only being a girl for her, or to get with her, or to... to go into girls' bathrooms, or something. I don't know." I wondered if I should tell Noland about the series of kisses… "I really don't think she's that shallow," Noland said, oblivious to the fact that exactly that thing had already happened. "But maybe you're right. You made your move, so she knows you like her. Maybe you should wait until she makes the next move? The ball is in her court, so to speak." "Assuming we're even playing the same game." I muttered, feeling a little more glum than I wanted to admit. To his credit, Noland countered with a very solid. "At least you're playing for the same team now." ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 4 Link to comment
diaperpt Posted January 27, 2021 Share Posted January 27, 2021 So cool that Noland was so cool about Ellie. He seems to have a decent understanding of gender and I think his statement about subtle changes dat to day is pretty insightful for a cis guy. As for the talk about Ellie and Kylie is interesting and frustrating. Ellie would love a relationship but Kylie is still afraid of a relationship even though its obvious she wants one. I think Noland's suggestion of the ball is in Kylie's court is a bad idea. I think Kylie needs to be helped to see that Ellie wants a relationship that will only improve on the friendship they have now. And now I've got to wait to see how right ...or wrong... I am. Link to comment
YourFNF Posted January 27, 2021 Share Posted January 27, 2021 20 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: "This sounds so tedious, Ky," I groaned, and then groaned again, because I was immediately aware of how boyish my groan was. Aurgh! This was stupid. Gender was stupid. I was stupid. Fucking mood 1 Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 27, 2021 Author Share Posted January 27, 2021 Chapter Fifty-Three Noland's dinners were notoriously good; it was one of the reasons I loved coming over here. Maybe my only reason. I liked Jen well enough, but we weren't FriendsTM. I had eight pieces of garlic bread and elected to skip out on the pasta. Ellie barely ate anything. It was almost normal. Like my best friend looking totally different and wearing totally different clothes didn't actually change anything at all. What was I so worried about, anyway? "We should go to your place tonight," I offered Kylie, in a moment of quiet after dinner. She may have missed the earlier comment from Jen, but I sure hadn't - they had date night planned tonight, and I really could think of a thousand things better to fill my night with than the sounds of pegging via proxy. "My place?" I blinked in surprise. Of course, we had stayed at my place a thousand times. It was convenient. I even had a spare room for her! But, well... other than the one time Marnie crashed in my room after the Solstice Party, I had never had a girl stay over before. Obviously Ellie was always a girl! Even if she didn't know it. Right? It wasn't weird, right? Just two totally gay girls that totally probably had crushes on each other staying in the same small apartment. Totally normal. Totally ordinary. "Uh... sure. Yeah. Sure. Of course." "You're the best." She was oddly quiet though, a lot less her usual 'I know~' kind of response than I'd been expecting. We watched a movie with Noland and Jen, but I was a little lost in thought. I knew nothing should be different, but it felt different. Just a little bit. We hadn't had a night alone together since the "I'm a girl" thing, which was... admittedly only yesterday. Yesterday? It felt like weeks had gone by. After the movie, I drove Ellie and I back to my place. She had clothes already in the spare room - she stayed over often enough - but I doubted she would appreciate them anymore. Maybe she wanted to borrow a nightgown. Was she going to take off her makeup? Maybe if she looked more like a boy this wouldn't be so weird. Was that transphobic? Fuck, I was such a mess... "Do I wear a bra to bed?" I mean, I figured I wasn't supposed to, but I knew about as much about girls as I knew about video games: very, very little. I cocked my head to the side in curiosity as she stared up at me from the bed; I was in a skirt and bra and nothing else, and I hadn't taken off my makeup. And she was staring. Was this a faux pas? Fudge. "Uh. Ordinarily, no? Uh, I think it actually has to do with your bra size, so..." My chest wasn't huge; Caroline measured me at a C cup. But Ellie's boobs were... for lack of a better term, non-existent. Maybe she would feel more comfortable in a bra? "That one is from Caroline's store, yeah? You should be fine to sleep in it if you want to." Notably, Ellie would need new bras, ones that gave her a bit more padding in the chest area. Then I wondered if she would get real boobs. Was that a surgery thing? And that led to the thought of Ellie with boobs, standing topless in my room, and I felt warm. I passed her a spare set of pajamas; totally not up to her fabric standards, but they were purple and had flowers on them. More girly than anything she owned. "I'm gonna step out," I muttered, leaving Ellie alone in my room. I took out my phone and sent Marnie a text. I wasn't doing very well... I wore the bra. I also wore her pajamas, and I didn't cause a fuss about wearing them either. But until I bought some more suitable sleepwear of my own, I was just grateful that she was being so generous. * * * * * > What's up? > Stupid feelings shit. > It's literally no different having her here! I should not be freaking out! > Ugh I'm so mad at myself right now. > How can I help? > Talk to me about it, Smylie. > I don't know. I don't know what's wrong with me. She's cute, so what? I have gone my whole life without getting flustered around cute girls. > And honestly I am not even flustered around her normally. It's just now, because she's staying the night. Even though it's happened like a billion times. > Fuck I'm stressed. I'm gonna have a stupid panic attack over this! Then what? > I hate this. I should be better at handling this. > Maybe it's Ellie you should be sharing those feelings with? > I know it sounds anathema to do that, but I'll talk you through it if you’d like > I don't want to like her. > I don't want to date anyone. > I just want to not have a panic attack please. > Fix it. > Without coming over. Wow, I sounded like a Mommy's girl... > Well, put her in the spare room, pretend nothing's different. > The world won't end, Smylie. > I planned to do that anyway! > You thought she was sleeping in my bed or something?! The door opened next to me and I looked over at Ellie wearing my pajamas. My heart was racing and I was feeling queasy. I'm sure it showed on my face. "So... you're freaking out, huh? Want me to... go? I can." Go? Great. She sees I'm not doing well and immediately wants to leave. Of course she does. Because I fucking ruin everything. "I'm fine," I said sharply and walked away from her, sitting on my sofa and sending another message to Marnie. > Forget it. > You know I won't. "I'm sorry... I'm not good at emotional confrontation, but I can see that you're upset and I wanna be the kind of girl who is good with that kind of stuff. So even if I suck at it, let me try? Tell me what's up?" I looked away from Ellie and down at my feet. What was I supposed to say? She made me nervous? She had no reason to make me nervous. It was just my fucked up mind fucking everything up, like usual. Maybe I should just... talk. "I have anxiety," I said flatly, still a bit annoyed. But the racing of my heart was making it hard to be anything other than scared. "Do you know why?" I asked, sitting on the arm of the sofa. "No," I lied. Though the next part was true. "Sometimes it just does this. And I can't do anything..." "Does it usually help more to wait it out, or to talk through it and figure out the cause?" I was almost certainly the cause; I knew enough to calculate cause and effect here. I knew she was uncomfortable around me. Seeing your best friend as a different gender was bound to make a person feel weird. "I don't know," I said quietly, more to myself than to her. "Marnie doesn't talk about it until it's over... she just helps me get through it." But Ellie wasn't really in the position to do something like that. No offense to her, but she wouldn't be a very good caregiver. Too indecisive. "It's just anxiety," I sighed. "I'm sure I'll be fine." Anxiety and anxiety attacks were different. Maybe this one wouldn't develop. But I was rarely so lucky. "I'd like to hug you; can I do that? Is that okay?" I was more of a 'sit on the sofa across from an upset person and listen' kind of person. But Marnie would hug, and she made up precisely 25% of my sample size of girls. What would Jen do? What would Caroline do? What would Kylie do? "I..." I looked sideways, from the corner of my eye, at the girl wearing my pajamas. My cheeks felt a little warm. Ugh... "Sure, I guess..." So I sat down on the sofa next to Kylie, next to arguably my favorite girl out of the whole sample, and I put my arms around her. Did I lean into her? Did I pull her into me? In the end, the indecision led me down a third option I hadn't considered; we leaned into each other, and I rested my head gently on hers. ...awkward... We had hugged before. We put our feet on each others' laps. We have even nodded off on the other's shoulder. But this felt different. My heart was beating too hard and too fast. My stomach was doing flips. My thoughts wouldn't stay in a single file line, no matter how I bossed them around. They charged the stage, waving signs and screaming as loud as they could. Then my phone buzzed. I checked Marnie's newest text on the home screen. > Remember you have diapers in your closet. I quickly flipped my phone over and tucked it into the couch cushions, hoping Ellie didn't see it. Honestly, what good would a diaper do? It wasn't diapers that made me feel better. It was Marnie. And she wasn't here. They were just a... a prop. Ugh, I felt sick to my stomach. Diapers in her closet. Of course I saw; I was a pixie girl with a short attention span; bright lights and buzzy sounds drew my focus without even trying, and I didn't mean to eavesdrop. Er. Text drop? Who even knows. I sat up nonchalantly and yawned. Did I mention it? Should I? "Do you wanna cuddle in your bed? Like we did at Marnie's? Would that help? I could be the big spoon again." "I don't think that would help," I muttered under my breath, pulling my knees to my chest. I put my forehead to my knees and tried to breathe the way Marnie taught me. In, hold, out. Slow. Why did this have to happen now? Why couldn't I just be a normal person? "So, Caroline, you remember Caroline, from the store? This one time I ordered these gorgeous cotton panties online, and—" I paused on that, wondering what I was doing; she was hyperventilating, and I was telling stories. Was it to distract her? To distract me? I think maybe I just wanted to make her laugh, because if I couldn't chase away her bad feelings, maybe I could drown them out in laughter. "And I get there and Caroline is having this argument with this like fifty year old woman, who insists they're her preorder. So they're going on and on and on, and Caroline is trying to explain things to this customer, and this customer is getting angrier and angrier. Eventually I say 'It's okay, Caroline, I don't want them anymore,' and there is just... silence. Silence while Caroline wonders if I meant to imply they were for me. Silence while this woman tries to figure out if I was implying they were for me. Silence from me as I literally hold my breath." I held my breath at the end of that too, for dramatic effect. "And you know what this woman says?" "Hm...?" Her story was like background noise. But nice background noise. Like a song you heard when you were in middle school. Like I knew all the words already. I guess that's just how best friends talk. "So she says 'I promised my nephew I'd get them for him'. And we're all still silent, and she looks at me, and I look at Caroline, and finally I tell her 'Your nephew has fantastic taste.' And she says to me 'He's too scared to come buy for himself and his Mom's a bit of a basket case.' So there I’m like, what do I say to that? Like, Auntie of the Year, right? But also, is that weird? And then. Then. She says, 'He's about your age, his name is Carson'." Boom. Mic drop. Because Carson isn’t a very popular name and we both went to high school with Carson Radick. That boy was the poster child for toxic masculinity and homophobic as could be - he gave kids like me the worst type of hell. A little laugh broke through my breathing and I closed my eyes tight. Okay. That was actually pretty funny. I turned my head and looked up at Ellie with a smile. Already, I felt exhausted, and the anxiety wasn't even that bad yet. Maybe it wouldn't get any worse. "Carson was a dick... he pinched my ass in ninth grade. I should have beat him up." "You should've pinched his ass and asked where his Aunt got those panties from. Do you think he was wearing in high school? I bet he was. I was. Can you believe the nerve of that boy?" I laughed a bit and ran my fingers up the back of her neck, so I could ruffle her hair playfully. I had no fricking idea what I was doing. Quiet filled the room. My anxiety wasn't going down, but it wasn't going up either. At this level, I could manage it. It was uncomfortable. It was exhausting. But I could go about my daily life. Or nightly life in this case. I let out a little sigh and lowered my feet to the ground. Everything felt like it was underwater. "I'm going to get my pajamas on," I told Ellie with a fake smile. "Do you want these ones?" I offered helpfully. "They're definitely some of the softest clothes you own." "N-no, I'm... I'm okay. I'm just gonna put on some pajama pants or something..." Plus, she looked gorgeous in my clothes. I didn't even know that was something I found sexy! And now I couldn't stop thinking about it. Why did she have to be so cute, anyway? I left Ellie alone in the living room and closed my bedroom door behind me. Pajama pants. Then I could lie down. Sleep would make all this go away, right? I changed into pajamas and paused at the door. I looked over at the closet. She only left those stupid diapers here because I was having bad anxiety last week and she wanted them nearby for convenience. I wasn't ever going to wear one, not without her putting it on me. But my mind wandered to the closet all the same and my body followed. A stack of diapers were waiting for me on the top shelf. This was stupid. Why was I even doing this? With a sigh, I stood on my tip toes and plucked one off the stack. Immediately, the feeling made me think of Marnie. The light rustling of the plastic. The cute pink patterns. And thinking of Marnie made me think about cuddling in her lap and watching movies and playing with toys and getting tucked in. And... I started to feel a little better. I hugged the diaper to my chest, causing it to crinkle, and took a deep breath. It was so calming... after a minute or two, I put it back on the top shelf and went to find Ellie. "Cute pajamas, wow. Why do you own such cute stuff? You have really good taste in clothes!" I just wished she'd spend a little more on them so they felt as nice as they looked. Speaking of feeling... "You're looking better!" I had good taste in clothes? Those were the last words I ever thought I'd hear out of Ellie's mouth. Honestly, she was more likely to tell me she was a time traveling alien from another dimension. I had to take a moment to shake away the shock. "Yeah. Uh... I just needed a minute, I guess." My chest was aching, but my heart rate was down. My stomach didn't feel like it had been tied in knots. Even my thoughts were a little less obtrusive. Weird... "Do you wanna play one of your games? I'll watch and I promise I won't even be on my phone, okay?" Which would be hard, because video games were boring. But for her… I could tough it out. "Yeah, I think that would be nice." I smiled warmly at Ellie - a real smile! - and grabbed my game controller. ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 4 Link to comment
YourFNF Posted January 28, 2021 Share Posted January 28, 2021 Oh Kylie you sweet disaster saphic just tell her and get the uhaul reservation already..... Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 28, 2021 Author Share Posted January 28, 2021 1 hour ago, YourFNF said: Oh Kylie you sweet disaster saphic just tell her and get the uhaul reservation already..... I'm glad you're enjoying it! Kylie's one of my fav characters I've ever written. I've never seen someone get in their own way SO much! XD Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 29, 2021 Author Share Posted January 29, 2021 Chapter Fifty-Four The rest of the night was uneventful. No panic attack. No feeling weird with Ellie. Whatever I was afraid of, I seemed to have gotten over it. But that night, when Ellie and I parted ways into separate rooms across from one another, I felt another twang of anxiety, just for a moment. I closed my bedroom door and went to the closet, pulling the diaper out again. This time I didn't hold it to my chest. I unfolded it. Honestly, I'd never really looked at one before. Mommy put them on, Mommy took them off. But, well.... they were kind of cute. Bigger than I thought they'd be. Hmm... > Hey, you up? Honestly, she had been working late. She was probably asleep. But just as I set down my phone, it vibrated. > You should know by now that moms never sleep.> What's up? > My mom always sleeps > She hates when you wake her up > But that's not the point > I was wondering if you could explain how to put a diaper on > It looks sort of complicated > It's not too bad, but it's harder when doing it on yourself > Do you want to video call? > No > Ellie's in the other room so I'm trying to be quiet > Can you just explain it? > I can certainly try. You want to unfold it first, give it a good scrunch and fluff. > I don't know what that means but sure > Unfold it. Lay it out on the bed. > And squeeze the sides around the padding in and out, gently, so it loosens the fibers a little. > Okay you are talking gibberish can you just tell me which side I sit on? > The side with the tapes? > Sure. > The tapes go at the back, because you pull them around and tape them in front. > Cool. Anything else? > I do bottom tapes first, you want them to be snug, but not cutting into your legs. > Those have hook and loop tapes, so you can take a few goes at it. > I don't know what that means > One sec > This feels wrong.. > I have no idea what's wrong about it > But it definitely feels wrong > Send me a picture. > Mmmmmmmmmmmm > Send Mommy a picture, Smylie >Don't start!! >Sent 1 image. > Hmm, yeah, you're uneven front to back. > See how much lower the back is? > So your tapes are all wrong. > This is hell> I take you for granted > True, but I love you anyway. > Show me when you've tried again. > Feels better but still a bit odd > These tapes are a blessing > Okay I tightened one and loosened one and I think it's better > Show me. > Blah it's probably fine > Sent 1 image. > Not bad! Did you powder? > You need a lot of powder, baby girl. > No you didn't leave any here > And I don't need powder if I'm not using it > So >:P> Ok going to bed now > Thank you for.. all that > No problem. > You should get your sister into a diaper, too, you find her less threatening that way. > *rolls eyes* > Night, Mommy ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 3 Link to comment
sparky_dude Posted January 31, 2021 Share Posted January 31, 2021 Late to the party but amazing story as ever. I love when you guys make caregiver like Marnie, super relatable. Really kicks me into Daddyspace/ caregiver mode. 1 Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 31, 2021 Author Share Posted January 31, 2021 17 hours ago, sparky_dude said: Late to the party but amazing story as ever. I love when you guys make caregiver like Marnie, super relatable. Really kicks me into Daddyspace/ caregiver mode. Thank you!! Also you're only a little bit late. ^_~ Still lots of story to go! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted January 31, 2021 Author Share Posted January 31, 2021 Chapter Fifty-Five "I don't think this video is working..." I sighed. We had been trying a few different styles of 'changing your voice' over the past few days. Luckily, the internet was littered with blog posts and video tutorials. Unluckily, some of them seemed to contradict each other. We were trying a new thing about "where your voice sits" or something, but I could barely follow along. I didn't need all the technical terms or whatever; I just wanted to know exactly what Ellie should be doing! Why wasn't there a Baby's First Voice Training app? Would that be too on-the-nose? "I'm telling you again, there is credence in the idea of being a mute. And and I'll be every guys wet dream, imagine; a girl who doesn't talk? Chauvinistic guys would eat that up." Although if I was being fair, guys already fell over themselves for me and that was before this whole 'El is a girl now' thing. Kylie looked about as impressed with my banter as usual, though, and I rolled my eyes. "You're no fun!" "I say we go back to the other video, with the girl talking about breathing." "That video was so boring..." "It was the only one that got any good results," I sighed. This was going to be a lot harder than I thought. "I don't know how I'm supposed to learn to talk when I have trouble even staying awake..." I deflated somewhat. Kylie had this level of patience for me that I'd never seen in her though, and that was kind of inspiring. I rewarded her with a few makeup tutorial videos. Then we watched TV. And finally, we looped back to voice lessons. I was starting to think there was nothing else we could learn. It would just have to be trial and error. "So here's what I think. You do this thing, that she did in the video. Breathe in. Center your... whatever. And talk." It didn't sound great, but maybe practice would help? "Any time you don't talk in that voice, I'm going to hit you." I pouted. "You know positive reinforcement works better than punishment, right?" "Hm..." I paused a moment and nodded my head. "Okay, if you can go a whole week without me needing to remind you, I'll... buy a dress. I'll even wear it sometimes." Ugh, this better be worth it... "A dress that I pick out?" It was important to clarify these things in negotiations! She shuttered and nodded her head, and I found myself clapping jubilantly. Oh yes, heavens yes! I owed it to myself to nail this. I owned it to the world! "Today doesn't count," I sighed. "Use it to practice. The real game starts tomorrow." How bad could a dress be, anyway? Though I notoriously hated them. Probably because my mom used to force me into dresses when I was a kid. Mommy and I had to do a lot of emotional work before I would even wear one at her place. Memories of that awful frilly baby dress from last weekend sent a shiver up my spine. "So? Weekend plans?" "Uh... at least one night at Marnie's place. She's swamped at work and I haven't seen her since Sunday." Though we had been texting quite a bit. "Do you feel like I'm encroaching on your space there? I worry a bit that like... Marnie is your jam, and here I am all bursting on in and stuff. You promise that's okay?" I always sounded a little gloomy when discussing the topic. "I don't feel encroached upon, if that's what you're worried about. But yeah, I guess she's sort of... my jam." We hadn't talked a lot about it, but Ellie had been spending more and more time with Mommy and me. "I mean, I don't mind sharing her. She's... uh..." This felt awkward. Maybe we needed a baseline before having this conversation. "I guess, what do you want from it? Are you just there to play and have fun? Do you even have fun? Or do you want more like... a relationship with her, like I have? I just... I guess I don't know what you get out of it." "I don 't know, that's a complication question. She helped a lot in this whole ‘coming out’ thing and that's pretty magnificent." This question was proving to be more challenging than I'd thought. Hmm. "I have a lot of fun. I get to explore with you and with her, and we kind of got to be close, and..." Ugh. "Would it be weird if I told you I was sort of getting into the whole Littlespace thing..?" "No weirder than me telling you the same thing," I shrugged. Though Littlespace was something that seemed to come naturally to me, the past week had been... enlightening. I really liked it. Not in a "helped with anxiety" way, but in a "felt nice" way. Ugh, this was so messed up. "Anyway, go on." "I felt really performative at first, but I realized recently that I'd been overthinking it. I had too much going around and around in my head as to how I should be instead of just focusing on who. Like. I like being your little sister, I think that's way cute. And it's a healthy way for me to look up to you without the pressure of idolizing you in a day to day way?" "I'm a bad idol anyway." I rolled my eyes. "So then you like it? Or, you think you might like it? The dressing up and the..." I didn't have to mention diapers by name; the implication was there. "I think so. I mean, once you uh... once you do what they're made for, I guess that's like a threshold. I’m on the other side of it now and it feels weird to make a fuss, you know?" I was blushing. "Yeah, I get that..." I blushed a bit too and looked down at my feet. Jeeze, this was awkward... "Um. Well, if you're sure you want this kind of. Uh. Thing. Maybe you should talk to Marnie? Figure out your... relationship." My relationship with Ellie was simple. We were best friends first, and sometimes - when it was fun - sisters. But Marnie took some time. She was my friend who I sometimes called Mommy, and now she was my Mommy I sometimes called my friend. What was Marnie's relationship with Ellie? Were they friends? "On the one hand…" Usually I would have debated this in my head, but I was doing my best to be a more open and communicative girl than I had been as a boy, so I let it come to my lips instead. "I feel like maybe I could talk to her now and get it all sorted out with all this other life-changing stuff. On the other hand, I'm like, shouldn't I handle just one thing at a time?" "Well, I guess it's up to you." I knew Ellie and Mommy spent some time together without me. They were at least friends at this point. And they had each others' numbers - did they text? I wondered if I should be jealous, but... weirdly enough sharing things with Ellie didn't seem to provoke that jealousy. Maybe if they were a little more intimate... oh, yeah, that flared up some jealousy for sure. "Just know, you have my permission if you want to be her Little. So don't worry about violating my space or whatever. I'm cool with it." "You're a good girl, Kylie," I bopped her on the nose playfully, deciding against any further discussion on this topic. "I should get shopping for dresses for you." "Yeah, you do that." I rolled my eyes and let the topic fall away. We went back to watching TV the rest of the night and I would remind her when she used the wrong voice. It happened ten times in one hour! No way she was going to win at this rate. That night, I arranged for another play date with Marnie. One night with Ellie, one without. There were a few things I wanted to explore with our new Mommy/Baby dynamic. Or rather, I wanted to let her explore them with me. ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 5 Link to comment
sparky_dude Posted February 1, 2021 Share Posted February 1, 2021 Another great chapter, cant wait to see whats next Link to comment
diaperpt Posted February 2, 2021 Share Posted February 2, 2021 On 1/31/2021 at 5:37 PM, Sophie ♥ said: "I'm telling you again, there is credence in the idea of being a mute Great idea! haha... and a bet, a dress, and a play date, oh my! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted February 2, 2021 Author Share Posted February 2, 2021 Chapter Fifty-Six "Did you figure out what you're doing about your parents yet?" Ellie and I pulled up outside Mommy's one-story house and I shifted the car into park. Driving felt so ordinary, so second nature, but I wondered if I'd be able to do it in Littlespace. It probably wasn't safe to test it. "I figured maybe I could write them a letter? Or send them a telegram? Like maybe I could go back in time and leave them a letter so by now they're already know, and we could be past the awful awkwardness?" "Voice," I said smugly. She had been doing so well all day! But moments like this, where we changed topics after a brief silence, were her downfall. No way I was wearing a dress outside. "Well, I don't think time travel is an option right now. I think you have to decide between telling them and keeping it from them forever." The latter might not be that difficult - they lived three hours away in Palm Hill - but probably not great for her sense of self. "But you're saying keeping it from them is an option?" My tone was hopeful, and she rolled her eyes. Here were the facts: my parents weren't awful. They might take it well, but they wouldn’t take it seriously. And things would be awkward! "It's your call. But things are going to get harder the longer you wait." I had been looking up some medications for trans stuff. She would get boobs. Maybe not huge boobs, but boobs nonetheless. That was a really appealing thought. We let ourselves into Marnie's place with my key. I heard her call from down the hall. "One sec!" "All I'm saying," I said to Ellie, "is that things will be way more awkward when you have boobs." "Boobs?" Huh. That checked out. I mean, I didn't consider that, and I probably should have. But that's not really the kind of thing on the mind of a person my age and my birth gender. Sex? Gender? Who even knew. I was a girl, and that was hard enough to say without getting twisted up in things. "I just don't want—" "Hey girls!" Marnie said happily. Saved by the bell. Marnie wasn't wearing her work clothes or her pajamas, which were basically the only two things Marnie owned. No, she was wearing a floral printed sundress that made her look... well, kind of like a mom. "What's with the dress?" "We're going out for dinner and a movie," she said happily. "Alright." I didn't care either way; Marnie was a good cook. But... "I thought you wanted a Little day, though?" Marnie's eyes shined bright. "I absolutely do," Marnie confirmed. I wondered along with Kylie how those two experiences reconciled. I turned my head curiously, but it was Kylie who put two and two together first, and she was not all that thrilled with Marnie’s math. "No!" "You wanted to take things a step further, remember?" Marnie said with a smile. "I make the decisions, right?" "Yeah, when we're at your house! Not when we're outside!" "We've gone shopping before. We've gone to dinner." "Not in Littlespace," I said sharply. "And not dressed up!" "You've worn a dress out." "Once. And I hated it." "Then you can wear a different outfit," Marnie concluded, though most of the Little clothes she had were onesies and dresses. She would have to get creative. "Absolutely not!" "Big No?" Marnie asked in all seriousness. I felt a well of frustration in my stomach. I trusted Marnie. I wanted to make her happy. Honestly, I wanted to follow this rabbit hole. But why did she have to make this a public thing? Wasn't there a consent violation or something here? I balled my hands at my sides and groaned. "Then it's settled," Marnie said brightly. I found it a little bit funny and a little bit telling that she didn't even ask if I was okay with the whole idea. I mean. I was! But that wasn't always a known quantity, was it? I wore dresses now, so what was a diaper added to that, right? Marnie took Kylie by the hand and led her to the bedroom, and I followed along like a lost puppy. "It you don't want to do a dress, Smylie, that's fine. How about a skirt?" "Skirts and dresses are literally the same thing," I said flatly. Littlespace wasn't coming quickly to me today. The idea of going out in public dressed up was... well, I didn't like it. The last time wasn't even Little time: it was JUST a dress! I watched Marnie go to the diaper drawer and I was quick to nip it in the bud. "Daytime rules! No diapers. No pacifiers. No bibs or any of that junk!" Marnie sighed and turned to face me. "Daytime rules was something we made to help you acclimatize. If you're my Little now, daytime rules aren't a thing. You'll wear what I put you in. No one will know but me and you and Ellie. And I will keep you safe. Do you understand?" Marnie hadn't been forceful in a long time. When she was, it always ended with us fighting. But things were a little different now. When she said 'I will keep you safe', I believed her. I trusted her. So I sunk into the bed with my arms crossed and didn't say anything at all. I couldn't believe this... "Diaper. Onesie. Shortalls." I was sitting on the bed, playing with the polish on my toes, while they talked. Marnie had made her offer, and she went on to explain it. "No skirts, no dresses. Just a onesie and shortalls. Mommy says so, and Mommy knows best." shortalls? Seriously? I knew we had a pair of blue ones that were sort of normal everyday looking, but still far outside my concept of 'style'. It would be better than a dress, but... "What about you, missy?" Marnie said, turning to Ellie. "You wanna throw a fit too, or are you the good sister today?" "I'm always the good sister~" I intoned, and I was really proud of how my voice sounded in that moment; airy and flighty and happy and silly. I liked that! I kind of nailed it. "You're in charge, Mommy. You pick." Bam! "Suck up," I shot at Ellie. She stuck her tongue out at me. Maybe we were siblings in a different life or something. Mommy got two diapers from the drawer - matching princess patterns. No stuffers, so she wasn't trying to humiliate me; that just happened to be a side-effect. Then she went to the closet to get our outfits. Sure enough, she picked out the shortalls I was thinking of. Then she grabbed a black onesie. I didn't even know we had a black onesie! But with the blue of the shortalls, it might not look like the most infantile thing in the world... maybe this wouldn't be so bad. Ellie's dress was a simple yellow sundress with ruffles along the hem. Something a pre-teen might wear, and not completely out of place on a young adult. Could our pseudo family actually pass as normal? I couldn't help but wonder about the ethics of wearing diapers out in public. On the one hand, obviously some people needed them, but that wasn't really us. I figured that Mommy knew what she was doing though; the whole foundation of this dynamic was putting my trust in her to not screw things up, so I didn't give it much more thought. Except for... "What happens when we wet ourselves in public, Momma?" When. Not if. I knew she'd like that. Okay, she was doing this on purpose! She was trying to make me anxious about it! I balled my hands at my sides and glared at Ellie. "I'm NOT doing that!" But Mommy ignored what I said and answered Ellie's question with a smile. "Not for you to worry about, sweetie. Let Mommy take care of all those problems. Now lie down." This was going to end badly, I just knew it. But I laid down on the bed all the same. Ugh... In hindsight, I was always going to be more comfortable in a leap of faith; I didn’t tend to overthink things to quite the degree that Kylie did. But also, I had the benefit of naivety and inexperience, so my brain didn't spend all the time coming up with bad outcomes the way that hers would. "Hey, um, Kylie?" She looked at me, and I realized there was something I was overthinking. "Eyes up here during diaper changes, please?" My cheeks went scarlet and I turned away from her, staring hard at the ceiling. I wasn't watching Mommy undress her! I was looking at her bra, wondering if she would get bigger boobs. But... well that was still sort of pervy, wasn't it? Mommy stripped us both, though we were allowed to keep our bras. Then she asked me to lift my butt. I felt the soft padding beneath it and the light crinkle. Then the smell of baby powder as it was dusted between my legs. Even as she pulled the princess diaper up and taped it around my hips, I never looked away from one of the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. I laid there motionless as she did the same to my sister. I didn't know how I felt about the downstairs differences we had. Obviously I wasn't like most girls in that regard. I thought maybe I didn't care so much, but Kylie had freaked out about it in the past and I didn't want to upset her. When we were in diapers, we were just the same, and that was one of the nicer things about all of this. Mommy helped Ellie up first and started fitting her in the dress. I just laid there with red cheeks, watching the ceiling. I wasn't sure how I looked in that moment. Probably not very sexy, in nothing but a bra and a diaper. Truth be told, we didn't see each other in diapers very often; we had dresses and bloomers and nightgowns to cover them up. I covered my face with my arms. Ugh, couldn't I just be attractive for once? When Mommy was done dressing Ellie in her sundress, she sat me up and pulled the onesie down over my head. Then I had to lie back down again for her to button it up. Ordinarily, I liked when Mommy took the initiative to dress me. Today though, I was more concerned about the way it looked to Ellie, standing above me and watching. "You're pretty..." I mused quietly, maybe out of admiration, or out of envy? But I said it all the same, and I rocked back and forth on my heels as I watched Marnie dress Kylie. "Whatever..." Mommy helped me into the blue shortalls and pulled them up over the diaper. They were loose, but if I bent over I was sure the extra padding on my butt would look weird. She buckled the straps over my shoulders and slid a headband behind my ears. Hair accessories were more Ellie's thing than mine, but she insisted it would complete the 'look'. And it did. Between Ellie's yellow sundress and my shortalls, we looked like teenagers. Childishly dressed teenagers, but teenagers nonetheless. I pulled on the shortalls along the hips and sighed. "I can't go out like this..." But already, the thick diaper between my legs was ebbing me toward Littlespace. "You can, and we're going to have a wonderful time. Before you know it, you're going to be cooing to Mommy about all the toys you want." I had to admit, Marnie spoke with the kind of conviction that could have made a believer out of just about anybody! Mommy touched up Ellie's makeup and took us into the living room. She sat us on the sofa and dressed our feet - me in my ordinary lace-up Converse and Ellie in shiny black buckle shoes. Ellie and I were only a half-size apart in shoe size, but I hadn't seen those shoes before. Then she grabbed a bag from the chair. It was inconspicuous enough, but I had an idea of what was in it. My anxiety was rising, but the warm little feelings in my tummy was keeping it at bay. I stopped at the hallway mirror to get one more look at myself. "You can't tell, right?" I asked Ellie in a whisper, looking at the shortalls. You definitely couldn't tell with her. Maybe I should have worn a dress after all... "I mean, I can tell, but I think it's super cute and I know you're wearing it, so I'm a bad judge for this." Alternatively, I flipped up the hem of my skirt in front of the mirror to show off my diaper for her to see. "I think the wind is going to be more of the enemy than anybody who might look at you." "You should ask for shorts," I said sourly. "Everyone wears shorts under dresses." I didn't like that she could tell. Even if she knew I was wearing it, she shouldn't be able to tell! Ugh, I didn't wanna do this! This was so stupid! Why had I let Mommy talk me into it? "I think if Mommy wanted me in shorts, I'd be in shorts." I nodded assertively, and then took her by the hand. In for a penny, in for a pound. I didn't understand how she could be so... committed. How could she let Mommy decide everything for her? I'd been working with Mommy for months, and I had only just gotten to the point where I trusted her. Was there something wrong with me? Was this all because of... Marnie had a pretty big bag slung over her shoulder, and I wondered what she had inside - did girls just have purses that big? Maybe she'd packed lunch? Heck if I knew. But one thing I'd learned was that it was better just not to overthink this kind of stuff. ---------------------- Thank you for reading! Like, Comment, and check us out on Patreon! 5 Link to comment
![[DD] Boards & Chat](https://www.dailydiapers.com/board/uploads/monthly_2021_11/DDweb-02.png.0c06f38ea7c6e581d61ce22dffdea106.png)
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now