This is me

[incondl]

I suggest that you get the diapers and put them on and keep them on always. It sounds like it’s what you need. Slowly your wife will see the change in you and decide that yes he’s a better person with them on. I’m not sure if you use them for their intended purpose but if you do then keep it up. I’m urinary incontinent and I’ve made myself bowel incontinent. There are people I’m very close to that know that and my relationship with them hasn’t changed a bit. 

[oliver d]

Howzit

Do what you think is right for you,if you want to wear then wear and enjoy.You have told your wife everything so now the ball is in her court so to speak.Do not push or put her under pressure about just wear but not with a "in your face attitude' keep it hidden and discreet,if she asks you then tell her yes.The more you push it on her the more she will become anti  you wearing.

[Dlbychoice]

Thanks all for your input. 

Yes I do use them for their intended purpose. I don't see the point not to. When I wear she knows. It's never guess work for her. She is ultra sensitive and can hear the most silent and see the most discrete nappy. 

I have been wanting to go get new stock but haven't been able to do so yet. Also trying to see if I can find new different options but it's so frustrating that there is a very limited choice. To get printed type is just not economical. 

I did have a thought of getting my wife involved in picking out the nappy. Maybe by doing that she will feel she ahs a bit of control over my wearing. Probably a really silly idea. 

[incondl]

How do you feel when you’re not wearing? Anxious? Sad? Incomplete? Is the underlying reason because you want or need to be incontinent? I fully understand the deep seeded need feeling. 

[Dlbychoice]

I wouldn't say I want or need to be incontinent. Nappies just make me feel better. I wouldnt say I'm an anxious person or sad. Stress yes. There are times I don't need nappies and there are times all I want is a nappy on. I have tended to wear nappies more often than not as of late besides the last week or two due to trying to work things out with my wife. 

For me there is a fine line. If one had to compare it to taking drugs. You start with one here and there and gradually work up to not managing without your daily dose. I almost feel that nappies have become the same thing. I almost can't live without them. Which does worry me a bit. I want to say it's not normal. But it feels normal. Do you think you could class nappies as a form of drug? I don't want to and don't like thinking in that way at all. 

I don't know if I have answered your question. But that's my answer I suppose. 

[incondl]

I guess you can compare it to drugs but I don’t. Addiction to drugs become a physical dependence. The need to wear & use a diaper is a deep seeded need to allow you to go thru life feeling complete. I cannot answer why but it is. For me I took it further because diapers were only the tool to contain my bowel incontinence. It was then I felt complete. So I do understand your feeling. 

[Dlbychoice]

On Thursday I told my wife that I was going out to buy new nappies. I asked if she had any preferences. She said no. But I think it took her by a bit of surprise that I asked. Lol. 

So I went ouy and bought but didn't put one on straight away. I waiting until yesterday afternoon. I was going to wait until today as my wife and girls normally go horse riding for the day which leaves me the house for the day. I was going to wait so that I could really enjoy putting a nappy on and just really enjoy it. But due to the weeks weather horse riding was off. So I decided to put one on when I got home. Which I did. 

My wife then comes up with the idea of us going out to the shopping mall to window shop and grab some dinner. I'm like I have just put a nappy and she now wants to go out. I'm not sure if she knew I had one on or not. So I decided to hell with it. I'm keeping it on. We went out and shopped and had dinner then came home. I even went to bed with the same nappyon because it wasn't all that wet. Ended up using it during the night, waking up slightly to wet obviously and then back to sleep. Then waking up to a nice wet nappy. Had a good night's sleep again. Changed out of it but didn't put another o e on as I had to go do a quick job. Came home and I'm now sitting in a new comfy nappy. 

Not sure if I'll be 24/7 straight off the bat again but we will see. 

On another note after our chat the other night, my wife's attitude has changed for the better. But that was without nappies around. Thinking about it. It's been good since I told her I'm going to buy new nappies. 

Let see where this new journey goes. 

[oliver d]

Good  for you,I hope for you things work out for the better.

[Dlbychoice]

Hi all

Sorry I havent posted for a whe now.

All is going well although I actually haven't been wearing for a while. My choice. Just haven't felt the need to. I did go out a buy new nappies and have worn one or two. Then I just haven't. Today is the first day that I feel I want to wear again. But I'm waiting for my family to go out. 

Thanks again to all who have supported me and given me advice. 

[agent]

I've been following your thread. I hope you have a great time when you get the chance to wear again

[Dlbychoice]

Hi Agent. 

Thanks. It was a good day wearing my nappy again. The problem is, I get so lazy and all I want to do is sit in my nappy and watch TV. Suppose it's not a bad thing.... Lol

[agent]

Haha, good to hear nice to have a bit of time to yourself ?. I usually just browse the web, but sometimes I try and do some work padded... or trim parts of the garden ?.

[oliver d]

Good for you,just do whatever you want to do.

[Dlbychoice]

Thought I would update this thread of mine. 

It's been sometime since I posted here. Lock down for me has been interesting. I have been wearing nappies on and off, to the point it's sometimes frustrating. Some days I want to wear but at the same time I don't. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. 

But lately I have been wearing more often than not. I always have nappies available. 

Now last night something very interesting happened. I have been wearing for over 24 hours. But when I got home from work I decided not to put a fresh nappy on after my shower. When it was bedtime I thought about putting my usual night nappy on but decided against it. At some point during the night (it felt like I had just fallen asleep but can't say for sure) I semi woke to me starting to wet the bed. I can remember feeling it start and thought I have a nappy on but then realized I didn't. I didn't get a fright at all. I just stopped it, lay there for a minute then realized properly what had happened but again didn't get a fright or wasn't worried. I proceeded to get up and went to the loo. I then remember feeling the back of my sleeping shorts just to make sure it was real and sure enough it was. I got a towel and dried the area as best as possible and then jumped back into bed and fell asleep again. I think from there I was semi conscious keep an eye out but at the same time I slept well. 

Now I don't know if I should be worried, happy or excited about this unexpected event. To be honest for a very long time now I have had the mind set of what happens happens and I'll deal with it. I am still of that mind set. But it's almost surreal. Also what do I do tonight. Should I wear my night time nappy or not and see what happens. I also should note that when wearing at night, I normally semi wake up, wet and go back to sleep. I don't wear every night. Only on the odd occasion. Or when I'm feeling brave enough to wear to bed with my wife around. Thats a while other story. My side not My wife's. 

I must say it's an interesting cross roads to be at. 

[agent]

It sounds like ideally you should wear every night. You don't have to use them. I'm surprised your wife is still unhappy about the situation, it's been a while now?

I wear every night. I don't think I have any IC issues. If I don't wear it feels like I'm going to have an accident. If I do wear the feeling disappears. These are cloth. My long term partner doesn't mind. 

[Dlbychoice]

Hi Agent

I wouldn't say my wife isn't happy with the situation. She just doesn't want to be involved 90% of the time.. I test this every now and then. I will get to a  point that I want to wear more often. I will then message my wife and tell her how I feel and what I would or going to do. Then I ask if she would be willing to help me by putting me into a nappy a few times. Normally I don't get a response in any format. The last time I did it, when I got home from work. She said to me I must call her after my shower. That all I got from her. I then went to shower and chickened out. When I got back to the living room my wife was in her office with her door closed. So calling her would have been useless and questionable to my kids as to why I'm calling her to our bed room. 

Messaging my wife has become sort of my safe way of telling her what I'm upto when it comes to wearing nappies. We have had some bad verbal confrontations in the past. So I either communicate by message or letter. 

Don't get me wrong, our relationship is solid. My wife tolerates my nappies, but that as far as she goes. She has put me in a nappy once or twice. But it wasn't in a caring manner at all. It was lift up, down. Front of the nappy up and tape. I would always have to redo the nappy because she didn't fit it properly. She would then almost sprint out the room. However she now can be in the same room when I'm putting on a fresh nappy. I can sleep in nappies if I want. But it's me that stops myself as I still get embarrassed sometimes or I feel I don't want my wife to feel uncomfortable. At the moment I'm back on with 24/7 and I don't have a problem having a nappy on when going to bed. But I always try get it all done before my wife's gets to the bedroom. I also feel like she delays coming to the bedroom knowing that I am changing my nappy. It's a weird situation. A lot of tiptoeing on my side a lot of precaution taking to ensuring my nappy isn't exposed so my kids don't see it and anyone else for that matter. 

As for the bed wetting incedent, it didn't happen again at all. I didn't wear a nappy for the rest of that week just as a test. But I was having to go to the loo once or twice a night. Really annoying. But as mentioned already I'm back on 24/7 and enjoying it for now. 

I thought well I'm here, I may as well tell you all about how my incontinence training is going. Well not really training as in "I'm training to become incontinent". Rather, I think I have said in the past on this thread, just allowing my body to do as it wants. 

I have always found it fascinating that when I am not wearing nappies that my continence is perfectly fine. But as soon as I have a nappy on its almost like I have always been incontinent. Most of the time all I feel is something happening and then the. Warm feeling. There is no build up, no warning nothing. Just the warm feeling happening in my nappy. Most times I don't feel anything only know my nappy is getting wet. I literally put no effort in to wetting. It just happens whenever it needs to happen. It's really a good feeling and sometimes I ask myself why am I not in nappies permanently. I'm so much more comfortable in a nappy. 

[Dlbychoice]

So it's been a week of 24/7 and finding it so strange that the more I wear the more comfortable I am in a nappy over normal underwear. I have been getting better sleep as I don't have to get up to go to the toilet. Speaking of which, the other night my wife woke me up and told me to go change my nappy because it smells. I mumbled something and went back to sleep. Oops. But then she woke me again about 2 mins later saying not to worry, it was the way she was sleeping. So promptly back to sleep I went. But it did get me thinking, what can I do to reduce the smell in bed to make it better for my wife. So for the rest of the week I have been searching the internet to find a nappy that would control the smell a little better. I also tried to sleep with a nappy cover but that lasted about 10 mins because they feel way to tight around my legs. I need to order some bigger ones. Anyway the search was very frustrating. My thought was a plastic backed nappy would do the trick as I have read a lot on the site as well as other sites how they block the smell. Come the end of the week and I have found absolutely nothing in South Africa that is plastic backed. They have all moved to cloth backed. 

So today I decided while the family is out to go on a mission to try find something and try get hold of some brands I haven't tried yet. I came home with two types of Clemens. The one I am wearing right now is cloth backed but just. It has a crinkle that I have never heard from a nappy before. Which tells me it is mostly plastic backed. So now I'm testing driving it and hopefully it will be my. New night time nappy. My wife will have to just put up with the crinkle noise. Which by the way I am soooo enjoying. I now understand plastic backed nappy wearers what you are talking about the crinkle factor. It really does remind you of what you are wearing. 

So here is to another week of 24/7. 

[oznl]

If it's a high quality disposable you are wearing my thoughts are that it should not smell (assuming it is wet only).   I've found some brands DO have a smell when wet but it's not the smell of pee but rather whatever reagent they are using to inhibit ammonia production.  It's a faint chemical smell and reasonably inoffensive.  If she can smell that, I don't think she's ever twigged what it is.

Some kind of plastic pant is a partial answer.  I use a terry-lined plastic pant as it also manages minor leakages (which happen from time to time) and it's less sweaty.  Another option is the Gary PUL waterproof pants.  I use them over my nappy during the day.  They are excellent.

You will get used to bulk/covers over time and if you want to be 24/7, they may be operationally necessary here and there.  I use plastic pants in some form most of the time and invariably in bed.