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[carbunkle0]

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[BriGuy]

It has been my experience that the diaper thing never goes away. It hasn't for me at least. It has also been in my experience that if the spouse isn't ok with it, then the diapers can become a point of contention.

When I dated, I would share this side of me fairly quickly that way if they weren't cool with it I could move on and find someone who is.

Tough situation though. If I were in your shoes I would talk to her, ask her why she thinks its a "dirty" fetish. Dig deeper and maybe you can persuade her that it isn't has bad as she may think it to be.

[babbler110]

It is hard I know I have lived through it. Think about it, in a few years the newness of relationship wears off and you either need to go without the diapers or live in secret.

As the wisdom of BriGuy suggest, dig a little deeper with her, education of your fetish maybe all it takes. I would strongly recommend listening to the the Big Little Podcast episode 56 about Communication.

http://www.biglittlepodcast.com/2012/07/episode-56-communication/

[Honu]

As others have shared, an interest in being in diapers doesn't go away. Sure, you can put it out of your mind for a while, but... Yes, you need to find out what she means by "dirty". Don't know if you are into pooping in your diapers, but that could be one of things she is thinking of. My interest is wetting only as it derives from late bed wetting, but if she considers that "dirty" too, then you're down to only wearing them like a costume. Usually the negative thoughts are pedophile related. If that's the "dirty" thing, it's easy enough to correct.

You hint at her BDSM side. The core of that is a power exchange and it could be that she is too submissive to consider any sort of maternal role. BDSM types sometimes include diapers as part of their bondage and power removal scenes. She may be open to diapers in the context of a bondage scene if she is into that.

With a little more detail, all of us might be more helpful. Good luck because it sounds like you have a good candiate for an LTR. This is really just a kink, but it's so misunderstood that it's not generally seen as one.

[Dubious]

So, she likes getting spanked....

[BriGuy]

Ive explained it as I've learned with how it came about in my life. I've been open and honest and so far that hasn't backfired on me yet!

[Guest diaperj71]

That is a tough one. I agree with the post about the BDSM thing and that diapers fit right in line with that scene. I'm surprised that someone with a kinky side as you put it is so put off by the diapers. The only time I can say I'm "lucky" in my case is that I wet the bed, so for me the diapers are explained for that reason (although i wouldn't wish eneuresis on anyone-it sucks somtimes) The fetish part for me is just a bonus

[DprJ0s1]

I told an ex, acually two exes about my fetish.

[dl_ashlee]

OT, but I found just because people are into other kinks, really makes them no more likely to be open to being ok with people into other kinks.

[Bettypooh]

OT, but I found just because people are into other kinks, really makes them no more likely to be open to being ok with people into other kinks.

In my limited mostly conversational experience, I find that people into kinks are a pretty even split between one's whose mind has opened because of their own kinks, and those who think their kinks aren't very weird while everyone else's is A lot of that seems to be based on particular kink they are into and whether they are top, bottom, or switch with it- tops can be rather closed-minded if they are 'control freaks' which many of them are Even if they're not accepting of other's kinks, at least those with kinks will talk with you a little about yours without being highly judgmental, and that's a plus compared to the vanilla world

[Guest diaperj71]

That is a pretty good point Betty. I'd much rather take my chances on someone who has or accepts kinks rather than try to introduce it to someone who is absolutely vanilla about sex. I find that dropping subtle hints or conversing on the topic can at least put the "feelers" out if the intention is to eventually tell the person. The nice thing today is that ABDL is a bit more mainstream than it was 20 years ago and even tbe knowledge that adult diapers exist due to commerials and media can make it easier to bring up the topic to at least see a reaction. If the mere mention of adult diapers gets a look of disgust, chances are it might be tough to get acceptance from your partner.

[blu4]

It took me nearly twenty years to confess my nappy thing.

[TBlazer]

Ive always explained the diapers thing from an emotional side. Wearing footed pajamas, using a pacifier, etc are an emotional release for me. I kept the sex thing to the background as I think thats what freaks people out the most. Thats not to say you wont be able to fulfill your sexual desires, but there needs to be some seriouse giving on your end before she'll give back to you, and make sure its a small piece at a time. Just let her know its a small part of you but a part none the less, and your trusting her with that knowledge because you want her to know the real you. No secrets. If she hasnt run out the door yet, just give it time and dont push it. People, girls especially, like being trusted with your little secret as it makes them more special than, say, your old drinking buddies. I bet it will grow on her if youre not too pushy. Best of luck with you man. Last time I tried to have an "old fashioned" relationship I was nearly raped, haha! Enjoy it!

[d_drew12]

Unless your girlfriend felt the same way as you from the get go, when you introduce anything out of he ordinary, she's probably going to not like it at first. I'm mean, what did you expect, honestly as I'm sure you played it over a ton of times in your head before confronting her. You didn't expect her to do cartwheels and immediately accept it and start changing you that evening right? So let it soak in for a bit and then mention it again at the right time. You'll find the right time. She may be mauling it over right now. She hasn't run yet and if ou haves good foundation in your relationship, eventually, you'll be able to do the diaper thing on some level. And btw, don't expect her to eventually be like your mother, don't push things, relationships are a bit of give and take. Find yourselves a happy medium and accept that.

[BabyOnBoard]

I've found myself in a similar situation.

[HitorMiss]

It depends on how big this fetish is to you, but for me I don't think I can go back to dating a woman not into diapers. i completely sympathize, though, because I was never bold enough to able to tell any of my girlfriends about my fetish. The fear of rejection terrified me. Eventually, I switched my plan around and decided to find someone into the fetish first, and see if it worked out from there.

[porter]

It does take time. Just keep things balanced, make sure you are doing things for each other, communicate and you'll be fine. It just takes time for someone unfamiliar to warm up to the idea of this lifestyle / fetish. Sounds like things are on the up and up. You owe it to yourself, and to her, not to bury these desires, which will result in you sneaking around with the diapers. Its unavoidable in a long-term situation.

[wetabenas]

for me, strait relationships just didnt work....