Sub-mid Life Chrisis

[Rhezz]

Do you ever think, god i feel so old, and my childhood just flew by so fast, it was great i loved most things about my "real" child hood, like 0-12, age of innocence type thing...

do you ever think, damn. Where did it all go?

[bruoy]

Sure, I think about how a lot of my friends are married, or are in relationships, and I'm sitting here in a super saturated diaper, thinking, wow' I never grew up, and the world is passing me by, and yet all I want is a mommie or daddie to connect with. All I have are my hopes and my regrets...

Sorry to be a downer, but that's where I am right now...

[diapereddave]

I think about those all the time, however the best way thing i have found to do is to look forward, as to what tommorrow has in store for you, remember your past, but always look forward to the future. IM 25 and married, at times i think i have t he world by the balls, then other days you have to wonder. Ihve had a rufff life, but i just keep looking forward, and everything is great. Just look forward.

[bruoy]

At least you have someone. I'm a sad looser baby who'se all alone...

I think about those all the time, however the best way thing i have found to do is to look forward, as to what tommorrow has in store for you, remember your past, but always look forward to the future. IM 25 and married, at times i think i have t he world by the balls, then other days you have to wonder.

[jessm5]

The thing that gets me the most about growing up is all the body hair in unwanted places

Seriously, there is a such thing as a quarter life crisis. Having just recently graduated college, I feel like I'm going through one now. Even more than a loss of innocence, I feel like my path in life is getting narrower and narrower. Here's a silly example: There's pretty much no way at all I can become an astronaut. It's not that my life's ambition ever was to be an astronaut (except when I was 5) but at least when I was younger, I had the opportunity to go down that path if I really wanted to. The thing is that it's only going to get much more narrower later on in life.

As with another discussion that I responded to yesterday, going through the same thing, I don't have any great advice. The only thing I can suggest is not to dwell on it too much. Everyone gets older. That's part of life. I think the key is to never loose sight of your priorities and find something that makes you happy.

-Jess

[Lil_Miss_Ruffles]

Hi guys.

Reading this post has made me look back and reflect on a lot of things, and a lot of "what if's."

I am 50 now. I am on my 3rd marriage (finally, a good one), and I have a small handful of exceptional people I call my friends. Not a whole lot more to show for those fifty years, but also very few regrets in light of what I do have now in ways that cannot be measured.

Sure, we ALL have those times when we sometimes wonder why the hell do we try so hard just to feel like we get kicked in the teeth. I think it's part of life and very few of us are fortunate enough escape it.

I don't even know where I'm going with this, but reading your post and the replies made me think of a letter I had read some time past and was able to find; looking back through all of my old archived email.

I don't even know if it is a true story, but I would like to think that it is because it is often an inspiration to me, especially as I grow older. I hope it helps some with any down feelings you are having this holiday season. So, here goes:

Lovely Rose at 87

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged

us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look

around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.

I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with

a smile that lit up her entire being. She said, "Hi handsome. My name is

Rose.

I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she

gave me a giant squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and

have a couple of kids..."

"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be

taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!"

she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a

chocolate milkshake.

We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would

leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening

to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily

made friends wherever she went.

She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her

from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football

banquet.

I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up

to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped

her three by five cards on the floor.

Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and

simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this

whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me

just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing

because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.

There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving

success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a

dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know

it!

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't

do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am

eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I

will turn eighty-eight.

Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea

is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for

things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with

regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our

daily lives.

At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all

those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the

wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all

you can possibly be.

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.

We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

"Good friends are like stars.........You don't always see them, but you

know they are always there."

Again, I hope this helps, even if just a little. There have been holidays in the past that I spent alone. I didn't enjoy it much and I understand where many of you are coming from.

I know that there is little, if anything, that I can do for you. Just know though, that there are people out there who do care and hope for better times for you; and will rejoice when you eventually find them.

Best wishes!

Ruffles

[jessm5]

Ruffles: That was truly an inspiring and wonderful story. I hope you don't mind, but I'm stealing that and adding it to my AIM profile.

-Jess

[drynot]

I catch myself remembering things like they happened yesterday and then saying...'wait a minute....that was 15 years ago!'

Its funny...I don't really feel like I have gotten any older than..say 20 yrs old. I still have similar thoughs and feelings that I had a decade ago. It sure is funny how fast time flies by.

Its tough, but I try and make life interesting by finding and exploring things about people and history and stuff like that. Life can be really fun, IF you let it be.

Hey...we can't take life too seriously...you can't get out of it alive!!

[Lil_Miss_Ruffles]

Ruffles: That was truly an inspiring and wonderful story. I hope you don't mind, but I'm stealing that and adding it to my AIM profile.

-Jess

Please feel free Jess. You can't steal what is given. I'm certain 'Rose' would be pleased.

***HUGS***

Ruffles

[Pipsqueak]

Thank you Ruffles!! That was beautiful!

[Lil_Miss_Ruffles]

Thank you Ruffles!! That was beautiful!

You're very welcome hun. I just hope that it helps some as it has me on occasion when I'm feeling sorry for myself.

***HUGS***

Ruffles