Corrupt-a-wish

[lilJester]

GRANTED all lead has been removed..... but it was replaced by mercury sorry for makin you mad as a hatter

I wish Hollywood would start making new movies instead of remakes

[underwhere]

Granted. Hollywood makes completely different movies, the likes of which have never been made before, containing absolutely no element of remake in them. Unfortunately, they all bomb, and the movie industry collapses, once again leaving the poor souls who used to work in Hollywood without work.

I wish there I wish pie charts were made out of pumpkin pie or pecan pie so I could eat them.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

GRANTED. pie charts are now pumpkin pie and pecan pie but they pumpkins and pecans are all rotten so you now have food poisoning.

i wish I could dance like the pros on dancing with the stars.

[Baby Brian]

Granted, you can dance like the pros. Unfortunately, as most people agree, most of the "pros" aren't really good at dancing to begin with and you suck just as much.

I wish I was three years old again and still retained all of my memories.

[underwhere]

Granted: You are three years old again, and still retain all of your memories. Unfortunately, because you are three, your ability to concentrate on any memory is very limited. Threfore, your memory is retained in your transformation, but then all of your memories are forgotten anyway.

I wish I had the athletic proess of a major league baseball player, and that I played in the major leagues.

[Yvhuce]

Granted. The process involves steroids. Lots and lots of steroids. You get cancer, testicles the size of grape-nuts, and roid rage, which proceeds to cause you to beat a hooker to death. And you're not famous enough to get away with it.

I wish there were no more professional sports.

[BabyJune]

GRANTED: Teams offer their players a "living wage" and everyone quits.

I wish there were no more rap performers.

[aleyxsis]

granted all rap is banned but now knowing the stupid music industry Slim pickins (look him up ) is the only music played !

wish good rock n roll still excisisted and bands lasted more than 2 albums

[Yvhuce]

Granted. Rock N Roll still exits. However, not only do the good bands last 3 albums, but the bad ones last forever.

I wish there were only good bands in any music genera.

[underwhere]

Granted, there are only good bands in all music genres. Unfortunately, each band only has one song, and as a result, you go mad listening to the same songs over and over and over again.

I wish I was a good mystery writer like Agatha Christie or John Grisham.

[LittleDeer]

^Granted, but due to your overwhelming popularity, you are driven to reclusiveness. You hermit away on some mountaintop until your death, and due to no one being able to find you, you die alone.

I wish that healthy foods tasted better.

[BabyJune]

Um...GRANTED. Some healthy foods do taste good.

I wish that donuts and coffee would make the list of healthy foods.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Granted. Now donuts and coffee make the list of healthy foods but you are now in guiness holding the record for heaviest person ever in the history of the world, so technically anything you eat within moderation is healthy to a point.

I wish that there were less HNG'S (pervs) in the chatroom to bother me.

[underwhere]

Granted. There are a lot less HNGs in the chat room. Instead, they show up at your door, expecting you to take care of their needs for them.

I hope SweetBabygirlAndi has sufficient security to keep the HNGs from getting inside.

[Yvhuce]

Indeed. The ingenious twist is that it redirects them all to underwhere's house.

I wish the HNGs would all just suddenly drop dead.

[underwhere]

Granted. They all drop dead, but Yvhuce has some explaining to do when they are all found on his roof.

I do wish that the roof can support the weight of all of them.

[freswith]

Granted. Yvhuce's Fuhrerbunker is notoriously strong, but there are serious problems in ventilation.

I hope Yvhuce remembered to keep the emergency exit clear.

[Bonsai]

Granted, the emergency was clear... before dead HNGs obstructed it.

I wish Yvhuce's Fuhrerbunker has a good supply of oxigen bombs and some filters to adsorb the carbon dioxide in excess, at least for some time.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Granted, Yvhuce wins the internet lottery and is able to provide sufficient oxygen bomb supplies for his fortress, unfortunately, the roof has holes in it due to the excrement waste being released from the HNG's.

I wish that Yvhuce can figure a way out of this terrifying mess!

[Bonsai]

Sure, like any good bunker, it's also provided of cyanide pills to make sure the occupant is never captured alive. Unlike most bunkers, however, there's also a red phone with a safe line always connected with Yvhuce's favourite babysitter.

I wish Yvhuce chooses wisely between the death pills and the phone call to the babysitter.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Yvhuce chooses the babysitter and she gets there just in time to pull him from the wreckage before he is killed. However afterwards Yvhuce has a horrid headache and the babysitter tries to give him some aspirin but drops them on the floor! Yvhuce bends down to pick them up for her but they hit each others head and Yvhuce drops his death pills too! After they are all picked up by the babysitter, she offers them to him.

I wish Yvhuce good luck in picking the right pills!!!!! (scene from Matrix, lol the blue pill or the red pill)

[Bonsai]

Yvhuce is an expert chemist and knows that cyanide salts form gaseous cyanidric acid if put in a low pH bath. So Yvhuce puts all the pills into vinigar and them picks up the ones that do not make bubbles, washes them and eats them.

Unfortunately, the babysitter was downwind when Yvhuce placed cyanide pills into vinigar.

I wish the babysitter understood in time that the smell of bitter almonds was not good for her health.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Granted, unfortunately she didn't understand this until she was sitting on a cloud upstairs.

I wish Yvhuce wasn't so lonely since his babysitter croaked.

[Bonsai]

Sure, HNGs have Resident Evil's virus and are now ready to make good company to poor lonely Yvhuce.

I hope Yvhuce can find someone as sexy as Milla Jovovich to defend him.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Granted. Yvhuce finds an ad on his blackberry for a super sexy Milla jovovich impersonator. he calls her up and she says she will be right over. He even prepays with his credit card ahead of time for her services. But when she gets there, she doesnt exactly look like Milla, she look like a 350 pound version of her, and she passes out on the front lawn from walking up the sidewalk to meet Yvhuce. Hes still screwed.

I wish Yvhuce could help fake Milla J lose some body mass.... maybe the HNG's could help?