Philosoraptor

This topic hits real close to home for me too. I've been married for seven years, and it was about a year into my relationship with my wife that I told her about my fetish. It was real hard for her at first, but she's been super great about it. She hates the look of diapers though. For a long time I always felt like I needed to talk to her more because of the guilty feelings. Despite her acceptance, it's not something she cares to think about. I generally don't wear around her because even though I know she's okay with it, I know it still makes her mildly uncomfortable. Honestly, the day things got better for me was when I told a close friend of mine who felt more comfortable talking to me about it. I was able to unload the feelings to someone I knew was invested in me as a person, but who didn't feel the same kind of supporting burden that a spouse feels. I could guilt free have the conversations with this friend. We've not talked about it for a long time, but I don't really feel the need to.

I typically only wear in short bursts. I'll have about a week where I take any chance I can to wear, and then whatever part of my brain seems satisfied for weeks or months at a time. During stressful times I tend to not want to wear despite diapers being really relaxing, but once the stressful time is over and I'm "coming down" I tend to start one of my binge wearing cycles. I'm working from home by myself which has offered me a pretty good chance to binge right now. My last chance came a few months ago, and it actually was pretty short before I packed everything away. I feel fortunate that this is how I naturally work, as it keeps the excitement "fresh" and fits better with the vanilla world.

As a teen I found some old pullups in the back of a bathroom closet. Out if curiosity tried one on and loved it. I'd wear the same one many times, and then randomly get paranoid and throw it away. Eventually I went off to college, and sustained my urges through diaper porn until my senior year of college when I acquired some Depends. I graduated in 08 which was a terrible time to be trying to enter the workforce and had to move back home for a year, but when I finally got a job and moved out I was able to order premium diapers online. I ordered all kinds of samples and tried every kind of diaper I could. After two purge cycles and realizing how expensive they were I finally accepted this part of myself. My girlfriend moved in with me, and I continued in secret until one day I got a sample pack of Bambinos in the mail and got pretty defensive when she tried to open the package. I lied about it, and then after a lot of thought (we had recently had a really good talk about our future together) I decided to admit it. She was troubled by it and needed to process, and after three of the most nerve wracking days of my life she told me the diapers were not a deal breaker. She's been my wife now for 8 years. A few years ago I finally "outed" myself to some of my close friends during a couple of discussions about struggles with being ourselves. They are still excellent friends. I'm moving into a new stage, my kid is three and curious enough to start poking around. I'm slowly working out a plan to keep this part of my life hidden, but unlike past me I'm not terribly worried. It's been a crazy ride for sure.

This weekend I also told a couple of my friends. One friend told a kink secret to us, he was super nervous andawkward about it and the other immediately chimed in revealing his own kink secret. Initially, I wasn't going to share, as my diaper time is largely solitary (my wife knows and doesn't care but doesn't want to be involved, which works for me) and had little relevance. The discussion continued, and it came to a point where I wanted to assure him that these secrets are things many people have, and in a return of the trust he showed in me I told him my side. Obviously, it was met with "Oh, that's okay" from both friends. Honestly, I don't think I feel any better having told them as outside of me talking about it or them snooping through my closet they wouldn't have come into contact with it. I do hope though that my friends understand that I reciprocate the trust they have in me. Though I'm merely a lurker 99% of the time, I do appreciate the large portion of this community that is very strict about not including unwitting public, be them strangers or friends in this fetish.

I'm going to copy and paste a part of my response in a different thread because it probably fits here better: "If I had to try to give advice, it would be this: You might feel the need to have a companion, but you don't need

My own thought processes are very similar to yours. It took a lot of time to get to where I am psychologically, and it'll take even more time to progress further because while I have a supportive partner, she doesn't participate and therefore has very little frame of reference and she's the only person that knows. I've got fantastic friends, but this isn't really a topic of casual conversation because of how personal it is and it's unlikely they will have a frame of reference either.

I tend to want to wear only after the stress starts subsiding. During really stressful times diapers are often the last garment I want to wear, but once that stress starts to go away its like a week straight of diaper time.

I liked Bambino diapers for a long time, but lately they feel like the padding comes apart inside the diaper and that they clump up more. I switched to 24/7 for a while (mostly because XPmedical was awesome) and those are still nice but I think they changed the sizing when they went to the new machine just a little bit and they don't quite fit as nice. I'm pretty much strictly DL but I like the color pink and I've been wearing Rearz Princess a bunch lately and really enjoy the fit and the quality. That being said, I'm looking to try all the premium ABDL diapers over the next however long it takes and hopefully expand into some more brands.

Hi, I've been a lurker for years (and even had an account that I apparently no longer have the email address for) and finally I decided that I wanted to post here. I've been on a rather long diaper binge lately, and I wanted to articulate a lot of the thoughts that I've been having surrounding this. On any normal topic I'd have a long conversation with a close friend of mine, but seeing as this is diapers and rather private I figured I'd post it here to people with a similar mindset. I love to talk philosophy but I'm also insanely careful about the people that I associate with, I'm a really picky person when it comes to my inner circle of friends and it's just easier to talk on the forums.