Ferix

When I started building cloth diapers, I would use repurposed bath towels and flannel sheets for construction to learn how to build the diapers. I swapped to birdseye and more expensive flat cotton weaves once I understood how to make the diapers. Flannel is okay to use but I don't like that prints don't hold up on them and depending on the quality, they can have lots of pilling. I have no problem with how long flannel lasts as it lasts longer than the birdseye fabric used on the same diaper. It's all about the thickness and the strength of the weave that lends to how long the fabric will last. Stick to solid colors or white if you want to use flannel or skip it all together if you have pilling problems. Joann's has coupons all the time and you can get away with purchasing terry cloth for cheaper with the right coupons, though $10.99 isn't terrible compared to other vendors. I'll purchase terry cloth from Joann's when it isn't available at fabricdirect.com. My typical terrycloth purchase is 50 yard bolts for $6.99 per yard.

95% humidity sounds miserable and sending your partner into orbit doesn't sound good either. I hope the weather gets better for you soon because you belong in thick cloth diapers.

I love my cloth diapers and plastic pants; I wear them to bed every night and sometimes during the day. I still love disposables as I think they are a close second. All my pants are sized to go over my diapers so I have no problem wearing and concealing my cloth diapers when I go out in public. I've never had any concern about people seeing me in diapers because I don't care: it's not that it's something I would volunteer or flaunt but it's no big deal if there's an accidental reveal. I go 1 and 2 in my cloth diapers. Cleanup is made easy with my enema attachment I have connected in my shower: I take the nozzle and hold my finger over the end like you would with a hose to make a high pressure spray which very quickly cleans off the diaper. I am not a fan of pins so I make all my cloth diapers with hook and loop, which makes them super easy to put on and take off as well as super comfortable and fit just right. Maybe try seeing if hanging your diapers in front of a fan works for you. I first dry my cloth diapers in the dryer for 90 minutes then finish drying them off on my drying rack that is right in front of a fan. It works great, even with how thick my cloth diapers are. This has worked for me for years.

I actually wear underwear all the time and have no problems with my clothes getting ruined when I pee. I just make sure to put the underwear on over my diaper :P.

I'm worried too. I actually submitted a report on the moderator's comment in the this thread yet no other moderator has talked to me about the report I submitted. It seems to be that mods follow up on reports since I received a direct message from that mod before he deleted it. He states he sent a direct message to me about a reported post from a user about harassment by mistake. He meant to follow up with that user but accidently sent that direct message to me since I was the one the user reported as harassing them, as the mod states in this thread. It's been more than a day since I submitted the report. I can only assume that either no mod is going to follow up with me on that report, or that the mod I reported deleted or resolved the report I submitted so that other mods would not see it as an issue needing to be resolved. That really does give a sense of helplessness. If the latter is the case, it should not be appropriate for a mod to resolve a report on a post if a report is on a post they had made. Other than @Elfy's blanket statement about who should be on this thread, there's really no acknowledgement about the other moderator's conduct in this thread or on the report I submitted about them. As I've seen @Elfy state elsewhere, "It's almost like if you give someone the go ahead to say horrible antagonistic things they will continue to say horrible antagonistic things." Not only does the moderator have the go ahead to say horrible antagonistic things, they have the authority to weaponize their antagonist behavior. It's like he flaunts his authority when he states, "Reminds me of the guy I banned several years ago..." I think there's several of us that do a great job looking out for each other and we try to keep the space as safe as we can. I do like this space and I will continue to speak to defend the safeness of this space of this forum when I feel it is necessary to do so.

I agree. I think BDD is grey and isn't just isolated to a few conditions like the examples given. There are other issues of BDD that people get surgery for but never are diagnosed with BDD because the surgery is socially acceptable since they are considered cosmetic, like breast enlargement, face lifts, nose jobs (possibly Michael Jackson). Not all of those surgeries are of course because of BDD but there are those who get that type of surgery because of BDD. I wouldn't even group the whole forum as having BDD either. BDD is just what I have been diagnosed with because I intentionally sought out medical help specifically to get surgery. What I have heard from the doctors I talked to is that incontinence desires is not really understood because there's no research on it. The medical professionals that agreed that I should be allowed to get surgery reasoned that the surgery would provide a better quality of life than having to live with incontinence desires.

You've proved my point: You haven't understood what incontinent desires is about as you were earlier trivializing our incontinent desires as a "kink and fetish" but now you clearly understand that it's "more deeply rooted". You also are now demonstrating that it is a mental health issue, as I earlier described when I said I had BDD and you chose not to look it up. You act as though you have bested me, good job! What statement? I don't disagree that I have caused myself UTIs, which were successfully treated after I sought medical treatment. You don't need to tell me I had caused harm to myself as I'm very well aware of the risks I put myself in and I always have been. I worked as an EMT for 15 years running 911 calls in Seattle and have transported hundreds of drug addicts to the hospital. They all know very well that they are destroying their life but have no control over their impulses. It's too bad your attempts to talk to drug addicts have not been successful. Most of the drug addicts I treated as an EMT have been pretty open to me that their life sucks when they know I'm there to help them (some not so much when they have overdosed and Narcan is given and especially not if they are experiencing excited delirium). Hey, you're starting to understand more! I already said I have BDD, which is a mental health issue. How is saying I should be locked in a padded room not judgmental? You say your not but this clearly is judgmental. 5 of the years I worked as an EMT in Seattle, I worked as medical standby at the mental health court, where patients are ordered against their will. I explain more about the threshold to hold a patient in medical treatment against their will in this post here if you're interested to learn more. You're wrong and this is assuming facts not in evidence. I actually had support to get surgery to become incontinent from my primary care doctor, urologist, psychologist, and therapist and we were going to treat it similarly to transgender surgery. I'd tell you to read what they said here but I doubt you'll actually "do your research" and you'll simply continue to make judgements. Yes you are. Thank you for telling me to seek medical help. Thank god. I never asked you to cheer me on but you're more than welcome to. I only ask for your understanding. No they're not. Numerous other people who are not moderators have made similar statements as you in the incontinence desire forums. I am responding to you because you're a moderator and I hope that I can bless you with understanding. Nope That's 2 words, and you are right. As it is our thread, I hope that the moderators understand what we are about so they treat us fairly and with respect. Again, as @DailyDi said: DD welcomes all who love diapers and "little" life (you clearly aren't welcoming). If you can't handle people who want to be incontinent please stay out of their sub forum. He also said elsewhere that it's fine and fair to share your opinion once, but there's no point in hounding us. We have to keep it civil. I think we are alike in ways. As you state in your bio: "If you are easily triggered you may wish to ignore me..." However we differ when you say, "...because you'll find that I don't care if what I say hurts your feelings" because I--do care--about other people's feelings and I avoid being abrasive. It's just the nice thing to do, you know? Thanks again for being our moderator. I wish you all the best. If you wish to further this conversation, please tag/quote me.

You're addiction to speed analogy seems like a false equivalency as you don't really elaborate what you mean before implying that a diaper fetish is dangerous. I think a better analogy is that incontinence desires is like constantly hearing a sound that's not there and there's nothing that can be done about it. The "sound" of my incontinent desires stays with me all the time and sometimes keeps me up at night. You don't get my desire. You do have a desire to wear diapers but you clearly don't have a desire to seek surgery to obtain incontinence from your desires. I have literally talked to doctors, urologists, psychologists, and therapists about my incontinence desires. None of them have "admitted" me. I've gone to the ER because I've given myself UTIs from stent and catheter use as I was trying to simulate incontinence--even then I still wasn't "admitted". The only times I have been able to mute the sound of my incontinence desires was when I was using a catheter or stent. You throw around statements like your an authority in the subject when you really just come off as ignorant and unwilling to understand. You seem incapable of making any meaningful points other than projecting your judgements on others. Don't worry about what I say as you already seem to know that you don't get along with people. This is our incontinence desire forum, deal with it.

This is literally trivializing our desires. We don't see this as a kink and fetish. Thank you for attempting to understand though.

Thank you for your service as a moderator. I can appreciate that you deleted my comment to you regarding harassment when the original message you sent to me saying "no one was harassing me" was a mistake. For the record, I have not harassed anyone. I hope you understand that I have personally seen medical professionals about my incontinence desires and I have been diagnosed with BDD, which is what causes my incontinence desires. I am clearly not alone with incontinence desires, though I'm sure there's few that have actually talked to medical professionals about them. To say that we want to "fuck ourselves up" does trivialize what we, those of us with incontinence desires, go through. It's certainly not easy to have these feelings and we often think, life would be so much better if we didn't have these incessant desires to be incontinent. Ultimately, we find that there's no escape from these desires and learn to accept them and live with them. I hope as a moderator, you can learn to not be so menacing and judgmental with your tone and be respectful of others with different opinions than yours.

@AwakenEvil, as a moderator, your comment is menacing and appears as a backhanded threat when you say "Reminds me of the guy banned several years ago..." No one is saying people should go "fuck themselves up". Your comments are judgmental and borderline harassment. You've also deleted my comment; To what ends I don't know. As @DailyDi put it: If you can't handle people who want to be incontinent please stay out of their sub forum!

@AwakenEvil, removed the report Your comment here doesn't show any understanding of our stance.

I agree. Go see what was on arguer's public feed. Someone had made a comment on her profile, parroting what she said to me but instead saying "Stop appropriating abdl culture. Its offensive when incontinent people pretend to be abdl. It trivialises what abdl's go through" What is upsetting to me is literally 3 moderators, @DailyDi @spoonchicken@Elfy, came to her (the arguer's) defense, one saying the following: "We all walk our own paths in life, and no one is an island (although it may feel that way sometimes). To accuse someone of cultural appropriation strikes me as ignorant. All cultures overlap and share many things. What you call cultural appropriation, I call being open-minded about news things. New things, new peoples, new attitudes, new anything, really. Will you accuse me of the same simply for enjoying Italian food when I'm not of Italian descent? Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations, my friend ! That's the first point to be made. The second is this... Your demeanor and choice of words are borderline harassment of a member here. That will not be easily tolerated. Differences of opinion are one thing, and that's cool, but your posts on this topic have been saturated with a lack of mutual respect. Speaking as a member of the Admin Team, I seriously advise you to either "tone it down", or just keep it to yourself. Believe me, we don't like Karens here." Where are the harsh words from the mods towards the arguer? I presume this is an oversight and not a double standard against me and those of us with incontinence desires.

You're right. I have talked to medical professionals about my incontinent desires, as described in this thread. I have been diagnosed with BDD, body dysmorphic disorder; My incontinent desires stem from a medical disorder. I have lived with incontinent desires all my life so I don't consider it to be a disability, I consider it to be part of my identity. I love who I am and I know it's 100% okay to wear diapers and have incontinent desires.

It can happen here too. There's plenty of others that have expressed their opinions in this thread. I'm always open to understand other people's perspective but it seems that @Kawaharu doesn't want to understand mine. She's had plenty of opportunity to ask questions or elaborate her position to back up her claims but only chooses to make broad accusatory statements, and then repeat them in this thread and in another. To accuse me of appropriating other people's disability or making it difficult for incontinent or disabled people to live is not what I'm about--it's quite the opposite. As I've said in this thread, I worked 15 years in the medical field as an EMT helping the sick and disabled. My current career is running a business making beautiful cloth diapers and ABDL gear. Every part about me is about helping others be themselves and I'm passionate about diapers. On top of that, it's no easy feat to want to be incontinent. No one wants that. I don't understand it myself but the best thing I ever did was accept that I have these desires and to allow myself to live like I'm incontinent. I have been diapered 24/7 for the past 5 years because of these desires. Will @Kawaharu respond in a meaningful way? I will wait and see.

I'm not.

Sounds like you need diapers! My flow varies from situation to situation. I haven't actually tested my control since I went 24/7 5 years ago. However, I know in situations of high stress, I will retain pee for hours and have quite a full bladder until I can really focus and release. Situations of low stress I can pee in small amounts, even dribble at times.

It's not what I'm doing.

No need to assume facts not in evidence; You're vague statements are convincing no one here in "incontinence desires". I've done nothing to make it harder for incontinent and disabled people to live. I hope you learn to accept that other people have different life journeys than yours. Have a good day!

No, it's not.

Nope. It's definitely not what I'm doing.

Okay, thanks for repeating. No offense is intended to those who are incontinent. I'm sure your opinion is welcome in other forums but it really isn't here in "incontinence desires" about this subject.

From my understanding, dilation of the sphincters could cause urine blockage as the sphincters would be stuck shut with scar tissue.

If there was a way to safely do the surgery, then totally 100% yes, they should allow people to get surgery to become incontinent. I echo what others think: There would need to be evidence that the person has made significant efforts to live the lifestyle of an incontinent person prior to having the surgery as well as getting the support of a medical team that considers mental and physical well being. I have tried to get surgery to become incontinent and spoke with one of the leading urology surgeons in America, who literally wrote the paper on sphincterotomy. Other than vehemently opposed to doing the surgery, they said it's not safe to remove the sphincters without also removing part of the prostate. Without removing the prostate, over time the bladder would weaken and not be strong enough to push urine pass the prostate, potentially causing a life threatening blockage of urine. Stents could be a valid alternative. Maybe someday there'll be someone out there that has the capabilities to offer stents that are as safe and as easy insert and remove as a catheter.

Part of me wonders how much is psychological: what if you went for a walk in the park or the store without a diaper? Would having a sense of looming embarrassment prevent you from wetting yourself? Would you be able to seek a bathroom before the flood gates open (albeit, you'd probably need to use the potty quite frequently)?