Fattymatty

I could hear my mother throwing open the drapes to let the sunshine in. She gently pulled the covers back and shook me gently; “time to get ready for school sweetheart.” I laid there pretending to be asleep and also pretending not to hear what she was saying. I was never a good lair but I tried all the same, shielding my eyes from the sunlight with my forearm I mustered up some pretty convincing snoring sounds, all the while I could hear my mom moving about the room around. I became aware of the cool morning air on my legs and hated the feeling. I’d always worn oversized night shirts to bed which I could tell was all knotted around me, I must have moved around a lot in the night, everything seemed normal except for my underwear, which felt warm and clammy, but I didn’t care in that moment. I only wanted a few more minutes of sleep, why couldn’t mom understand that. I didn’t have to pee either which further proved that it wasn’t time to get up yet. I felt my mom tugging at the sides of my underwear, I heard the pop of tapes being loosened followed by my mom peeled back the front of my diaper. The shock of the cold baby wipes on my skin was enough to jolt me awake. “What is… What is happening..?” I said in the most pitiful voice I could muster. With one hand my mom grabbed both of my ankles and lifted my bottom in the air only to let me down again a moment later. “Why am I wearing a diaper mommy? I wear panties. I don’t wear diapers anymore.” I said beginning to clear the cobwebs. Mother only laughed as she finished taping up the sides off the clean diaper. “Don’t be silly Ashley, we talked about this a couple days ago at the park, don’t you remember?” “We decided you weren’t ready for potty training yet.” I sat up trying to remember going to the park. I knew the park she was talking about, it was right up the road and we’d been going there since I was a toddler, but this talk that my mom was saying we had, I couldn’t place it. I feel like being told that I wasn’t ready to sit on the toilet was something I would remember. I shook my head, trying to gather myself. Okay so, I’m not potty trained and I wear diapers. That is going on and what else has changed since I went to bed last night? My mother helped dress me the rest of the way and even tied my shoes on for me, which she hadn’t done since I was in the first grade. Things at school seemed normal, I was still in Mrs. Saunders fourth grade class and all my friends were still there, Amy, Jenifer and Joan, all giggling amongst themselves. We’d always talk during lunch and recess breaks. Mrs. Saunders was writing on the chalk board when I felt a tingling in-between my legs, but before I could give it a second thought, I was peeing, the warmth spreading all over, I sat there unable to move. When the pee finally stopped, I felt around my pants and bottom with my left hand as carefully as I could, not wanting to draw attention to myself. All dry. Wow. The diaper held it all, I thought to myself surprised. This isn’t too bad. During recess me and Amy talked about her older brother Andy who would tease her, she told me that last night she shoved him into a metal door knob hurting his back and making him cry. She got in trouble but she seemed to be proud of herself. By the time school let out the diaper was noticeably heavier and I had a waddle to my step. I must have wet it again at some point without realizing it. When I got home my mother met me at the door, she inched down my track pants so my underwear was on full display, she pressed on the front of the diaper with the palm of her hand and then pulled out the back and peeked down my backside before telling me I needed a change, which I would have told her if she’d asked. But maybe that’s what it means not to be potty trained. Babies don’t tell their parents when they need a change; they don’t have to, that’s not their job. How nice would that be, not having to worry about anything and to be completely taken care of. It was a passing thought but an interesting one. I made my way to my bedroom and lay on the changing table along the wall. Had the changing table always been there? It must have, next to the table was a book shelf that used to have books on it, the books had been replaced with bags of diapers, the packages had pictures of boys and girls my age wearing nothing but diapers around their waists. They looked happy as could be. I’d never seen such a thing, or maybe I had. As I laid there getting my diaper changed, I looked around the room, I saw my old teddy bear resting on the bed across from me. I thought I’d lost him, I hadn’t seen him in a long time but there he was as if he’d been there the whole time. Dinner that night was a big bowl of Kraft Mac & cheese followed by some Family TV shows from the 90’s. During the second episode of Home Improvement I felt a knot in my belly that was beginning to feel uncomfortable. I knew Laying down would make me feel better so I grabbed a blanket and lay on the couch next to my mom. The relief was instant, I knew I was messing my diaper but it felt like the right thing to do. A few more pushes and the discomfort was gone. If mom noticed she didn’t seem to care. Oddly enough even though I could feel the full diaper pressing up against my bottom, I couldn’t smell it. After the show was over it was time for another diaper change and time to start getting ready for bed. Mom didn’t treat this diaper change any differently than the wet diapers she’d changed earlier in the day. She just used more wipes to get me clean this time. Before bed mom tucked me in and gave me a kiss goodnight. As I laid in the dark thinking about the weird day I’d had my hands felt the plastic of the diaper taped to my waist. It felt right, it felt like it was always supposed to be there. I pushed lightly against the front of the diaper and heard the soft crinkling sound. I hadn’t felt this good in a very long time. Sleep followed shortly after. When I would wake up the next morning I would find my room without a changing table. Books on the selves, no teddy bear on the bed and most disappointingly of all my big girl panties around my hips, the one thing that gave me pause was that for the first time since I was potty trained, I’d wet the bed. I sat up slowly taking in my surroundings. My night shirt was wet up to my belly button and the bed had a large dark spot the size of a basketball where I had been laying a moment before. It was coming back to me it was Saturday morning and by the look of it mid morning. Not really knowing what to do. I stripped out of my wet clothes and went to the closet to pick out a clean outfit. It came slowly that the events of the previous day had only been a dream. A very real feeling dream but a dream none the less. Everything was the same except that I wasn’t potty trained and it was a good dream, I was happy. But that's silly, nobody my age was still in diapers. Like every girl in my class, I wanted nothing more than to skip through the next five years so I could start learning to drive, go to the mall and date boys. But after that dream, I was suddenly unsure. It wouldn’t be bad to stay young, if only for a little while longer. Maybe instead of trying to act older than my age, I should act my age. After all here I was a young girl who had just wet her bed. Life went on like normal after that, my mom was upset for all of five minutes when I told her about my accident, she cleaned the mattress and wrote it off as a onetime accident that could happen to anyone. Slowly the memory of the dream began to fade, I chose not to tell my parents about the dream, mostly because I didn’t know how to tell it without it sounding crazy. A week later I was in my 4th grade class room, the sun shone through the windows warming the side of my face. Turning towards the light I saw birds in the trees while squirrels ran through the courtyard. It was a beautiful spring morning and I couldn’t wait to get outside and lay in the grass. I closed my eyes just for a moment and sighed deeply. My bottom grew warm as I let the air out of my lungs. Somewhere in my subconscious, I knew I was wetting my diaper. This was okay, the diapers get wet, they get dirty, and they get changed. No big deal. Except it was a big deal, the realization that I was dreaming came to me slowly. I looked around the class. Everything seemed right, except one thing, how did I get here? The last thing I could remember was going to bed the night before. And now her I was sitting in a wet diaper. I stuck my hand down my pants and felt the soft plastic shell of the disposable diaper just too confirm. It squished as my hand brushed up against it. When I wet the diaper I was probably wetting my bed in the real world I realized. Oh well, nothing to be done for it now. Now that I know that I’m dreaming, what do I do? I sat there in for a moment taking everything in. I felt a ball of energy slowly building inside of me and before I knew it I was running full speed. I heard my chair hit the ground and the teacher yelling after me but by then I was already running down the hall. I heard myself laughing as I threw open the doors to the playground. I closed my eyes and when I opened them again. It was recess. The playground was alive with the laughter of children at play. All my friends were there, we played tag, running around the field. I stopped to catch my breath. Hands resting on my knees, hunched over slightly in that brief moment of rest my stomach gave an involuntary push, I laughed as the creases in the back of the diaper unfolded to accommodate the mess that I was putting into it. I was pooping my pants in front of all my friends and it didn’t matter. I laughed some more as the flow of poop kept going until my whole backside was covered and there was nowhere else for it to go. Once I was done it was right back to playing. None of my friends noticed or skipped a beat. We played for minutes. Hours? It’s hard to say. Perhaps I’d actually grown tired because when the bell rang I forgot that I was in control and I followed the crowd of children back towards the school for lunch. One of the teacher’s assistants stopped me before I could get inside though. “Hold it right there kiddo, I think someone filled their britches.” Andrea the TA said with a smile, she gently turned me around as you would a toddler and pulled at the back of my pants to look inside. “Yep, that’s what I thought, why don’t you come with me and we’ll get you taken care of.” She took me by the hand and led me down the hall. The realization that I just had my diaper checked in front of the entire school made me giggle. I knew she was taking me to the nurse’s office. That was where I always went to get changed. As I opened the door a bright blinding light came over me and I was back in my bedroom. The bright light was coming from the window overlooking the street I must have forgotten to close the drapes the night before. My bed was wet, I wasn’t upset though. It was a happy accident. I thought back to my dreams this one and the one I’d had the week before, I didn’t understand what they meant but I knew how they made me feel. It felt good to be taken care of, to have all my needs attended to. A part of me longed for that. Was I too old to get that feeling back? After this second dream I had to know for sure. The End

A-Ah moments, This is an interesting topic and thread to read through. I find that I've had similar experiences as the ones listed here and can identify with most of what's been posted so far. I've been wearing diapers 24/7 for a little over three years now, which means that I've spent more time as an adult in diapers than I did as a baby in diapers, that in it's self is an a-ah moment. I can't put a date or specific incident when it happened for me but when the lines began blurring between wearing diapers because I wanted to and because I needed to was a moment for me. Perhaps it was an oh shit moment. Another big one was when I made the switch from wearing cheaper day time pull-ups and diapers to wearing thicker premium diapers day and night. Getting through the day with minimal changes and maximum comfort was so liberating and took wearing diapers from a thing that had been a chore and constantly at the front of my mind to something that I didn't need to think or worry about. Along with wearing better diapers came not giving a hoot what anybody else thought about it. I have never gone out of my way to hide my diapers, I don't flaunt them either though, that would be weird. Also not caring if the diaper fails or leaks was a big step forward. I'll change the first chance I get but I don't get myself twisted up in knots about it. If the diapers leak they leak. Oh well. How much time do babies spend worrying about a leaky diaper or wet cloths. Not much I would imagine.

Your story is very well written and has left me wanting to know what comes next. How long can she hide wearing diapers? Will her parents find out? And if they do what will their reaction be. All of these are things i want to know just from reading the few chapters you've posted. Great job so far, I'm a fan and I will be following this story as it develops.

I'm not sure what triggered this for me but the other day i went a couple hours diaper free just wearing an old pair of boxer shorts and pants around the house while doing house work. I even laid on the couch and took a short nap without wearing protection against my better judgement. I woke up dry but knowing that i would need to pee soon and I planned on making a trip to the bathroom after switching the laundry. I was able to get the dry clothes out of the dryer before the pressure became too much and I couldn't hold it any more. I went from knowing i needed to pee to uncontrollably wetting myself in about a minute. Clean up was easy because i was already standing in the laundry room where there were plenty of towels and clothes to change into. After that i diapered myself back up and scolded myself for being so stupid. I could have easily ruined the couch i was sleeping on or my family could have seen my accident. It's better to wear the diapers, It was foolish of me to think i could wear normal underwear and be accident free after wearing diapers for as long as i have, perhaps i was tempting fate. I'm still not sure what was going through my head at the time. From what I've learned, you can't know for certain how incontinent you are if you are never trying to keep your pants dry so when i actaully tried and failed so fast it was a bit of a wake up call. I'm not sure when i crossed the line of partially undoing my potty training and legitimately needing to wear protection but it has definitely happened and it happened without me even realizing it.

It sounds like your situation pretty closely mirrors mine. I have not tested myself however i have peed on the floor a couple times when getting out of the shower and before i could get protection on stuff like that. I'm sure that my control level has lessened but I'm not too keen on the idea of going back to regular underwear even if it is for a short amount of time to test myself. I don't want to ever send the message to my body that it can't let go whenever and where ever it wants to. I know it's silly. But It's a part of the mental barriers that I'm trying to overcome. My doctor did plenty of tests to try and get to the root cause but stopped short of prescribing medication for it. Saying instead that the best things i could do to fix it (if i wanted to of course) were lifestyle related and wearing protection was an exceptable option to help manage it in the meantime. After that I've been back several times for other things wearing a diaper and nothing is said one way or the other about it. It's just the kind of underwear i wear.

I've been wearing diapers 24/7 for around a year now. As long as i can remember I've always wanted to wear diapers because i needed them, not because i had a fetish for them. At some point i said to myself what am i waiting for? There is never going to be a "good time." I just have to go for it. One day, randomly it seems, i woke up to a wet bed. I'd never been a bed wetter so I was excited and a little freaked out. After that I gained the courage i needed to take it further. I had long ago come to the conclusion that full incontinence, while fun, would be too disruptive to maintaining a "normal life." Not only that but sudden full incontinence would be really hard to explain to those around me. Becoming urinary incontinent on the other hand seemed reasonable and obtainable. So i started wetting the bed and my pants every chance i got. I wet my pants at work. At home. In public places. In front of friends and in front of family. After a while the embarrassment faded and changing my pants multiple times a day became normal for me and wet pants didn't bother me anymore. Those around me and the people that knew me understood that eventually I'd wet myself and have to change my clothes because of it. It was my family doctor who first suggested that I should wear "Depends" to protect myself. It was after that visit that my doctor put in my medical records a diagnoses of "urinary incontinence." For some reason seeing that written in my medical record gave me the freedom to wear diapers without any feelings of guilt. I had gotten the medical excuse that I was subconsciously looking for. I started wearing Depends pull-ups but found that they leaked and were ironically more expensive than actual tab style diapers while being less absorbent. It wasn't long until i transitioned into wearing tab style diapers 24/7. I found that wearing cloth diapers at night while wearing disposables during the daytime was the winning combo for me. Wearing diapers is like anything else it seems. Once you get into a routine that works for you time can go by rather quickly and it did for me. I don't remember at what point the bed wetting really took off. It started with not getting out of bed in the middle of the night to pee and wetting while i was still partially awake, making sure i was able to pee without pushing. Then one or two wet beds a week turned into three and now just about everynight i wet my bed or diapers while I'm asleep. Daytime incontinence has been harder to achieve. I would guess that I'm probably halfway there. I never hold back and always let go the instant the urge is present. Wetting while sitting still requires pushing down I find that most of the time when i wet is when I'm standing or walking around. I've tried not to put too much thought into it, that seems to be the real key in all of this. Just don't think about it. The more I let my body do it's thing without concentrating on my bodily functions the easier everything becomes. That's really what i wanted to get across here. For me at least all of the hurdles to incontinence have been mental not physical and I'm slowly getting passed them. I have no doubt that one year from now I'll be 100% urinary incontinent and diaper dependant just as my medical records describe and i couldn't be happier about it. Have patience, wear diapers and use them as they were intended and you will become incontinent given enough time. After all incontinence is not something that you should be able to flip on and off like a light switch. If being incontinent is what will make you happy and it's what you truly want in life you should go for it.

The Tena ultra briefs are one of my go to diaper for daytime use. They are very affordable and absorbent at about $45 for a case of 80 size large on Amazon. The cloth backed outer cover means they make no noise under clothes. They are thin but absorbent, nobody has been able to tell that I'm wearing a diaper when i wear these no matter what clothes I'm wearing over them and there is something freeing about that. I work in a retail environment where i do a lot of walking, just about every plastic backed diaper that I've worn traps in heat and leave me chaffing and rashy by the end of the day but these don't as long as i don't go too long inbetween changes. The tapes easily readjust for a better fit or if i need to take a bathroom break. I'm pretty convinced that these are the best diapers in their price range and I couldn't recommend these higher. A very good diaper for those on a budget.

I think most people have answered the question of why there is hostility from incontinent people towards ABDL's who desire incontinence quite well so i wont harp on it. The wheel chair anology is a good one and I'm sure is accurate. Incontinence is a medical condition whereas ABDL is a fetish/lifestyle choice. There will always be people who get uppity and upset that someone would want to alter their bodies to have a disability. I get where the originally poster is coming from, it should be a two way street but it just isn't. Something that the original poster mentioned were feelings of shame and guilt and wanting the "justification" of incontinence to wear diapers and to come out to freinds and family as someone who needs diapers for a legitimate reason. I understand that desire completely and i have been there before but you don't have to dramatically alter your body to get that level of acceptance. That comes from within. Or if the only way you can find happyness is through being incontinent its as simple as making a doctors appointment and telling your doctor that you are peeing your pants all the time but are not interested in medication therapy due to nasty side effects (which is undeniably true) and you would rather wear diapers and use alternative medicine to treat your symptoms. Your doctor will ask questions and will want to run some tests to rule out major health concerns but at the end of the day if you refuse medical treatment they will make a note of it in your medical file that you are incontinent and will leave you alone about it. That way you get the diagnoses of incontinence and the "excuse" to wear diapers without doing something you might regret later in life. For the most part people don't care that you wear diapers and will assume its for a medical reason anyways. This is close to the road i took and i cannot tell you how good it felt to see the words urinary incontinence on my permanent medical record.

Thanks! I am not on the same level as those people you mentioned and I am 100% okay with that. I know my limits. Occasionally ill write something for me, because I want to, and If i'm able to finish it ill post it here but the vast majority of the stuff I write goes onto the scrap heap of half finished story ideas that I didn't thoroughly map out ahead of time.

Lol, this story is told through the perspective of the boy who likes the girl next door. It doesn't cover her history because it doesn't have to. The story starts when the boy first meets the girl. Is there something that caused the fear? Or better yet is there even a fear at all or does she just like wearing diapers? Maybe, who knows. Who cares. Ill be the first to admit that this story is far fetched but so are 95% of stories on this forum. I wasn't going for realistic I was just having fun with writting.

Reilly in diapers. This is the story about the girl who moved next door to me during the summer of my eighth grade year. I would only know her for about nine months and then after that I would never see her again. Her name was Reilly. She was about five two with shoulder length brown hair. She was pretty I suppose in a plain sort of way. But it wasn’t her looks that made her different. Reilly had a fear of toilets and refused to even go near them. A unique phobia to be sure. Because of her phobia she saw no real alternative other than to pee and poop straight into her pants and she would do so without hesitation. Her parents for their part resisted putting her back in diapers because after all Reilly knew when she needed to go. Her fear of using a toilet won out over her fear of embarrassment and getting in trouble. So these are some snippets of my memories of Reilly. The first time I realized that Reilly was not like all of the other girls in the eighth grade was the first time I saw her wet her pants. It was still summer vacation and her family had just gotten settled in. Reilly had set up a hopscotch game in her driveway made out of sidewalk chalk and she was jumping in and out of the squares. She was wearing a white tee shirt with a mini skirt on a particularly dry summer day. I watched her with passive curiosity from my bedroom window as she played the kids game by herself. I half debated going down there and saying hi but I thought better of it. At some point she stopped in the middle of her game and looked down the road. I couldn’t see what she was looking at if anything she just seemed to be staring off into the distance. Slowly a growing puddle formed between her legs on the concrete and partially washed out one of her squares as she slowly wet herself. Once she was done she went right back to her game not seeming to mind her wet panties or the puddle she'd made in the street. She played until she got bored of the game and went inside. During school registrations I made it a point to seek her out and introduce myself as the boy who lived next door. She was quite and shy and we quickly ran out of things to say seeing as we were both in the middle of our awkward teenage years. When she left I saw her again in the parking lot and at some point while waiting in one of the many lines she must have peed her pants again because the crotch of the jean shorts she was wearing were sodden between her legs. She didn’t seem to mind the wetness and waved goodbye to me when she caught me staring at her. I waved back politely as I got into my parents car and we drove away. Weeks would go by without me seeing hide nor hair of Reilly. In fact I didn’t see her again until school started. I sat a couple of rows behind and to the left of her during the introductory assembly. The shirt she was wearing had ridden up her back enough to reveal a white plastic waistband and a large tape off to the side. It was clearly a diaper. It made sense. because if she was going to pee in her pants it seemed like a good thing for her to be wearing, especially since it was her first day at a new school. She must have felt my eyes on her because she adjusted in her seat and pulled her shirt down and sat on it covering her behind. I began sitting next to her during lunch breaks and we soon became friends. For the first week or so of school she must have been wearing a diaper because she didn’t have any accidents that I could tell. I remember once I was talking to her in the hallway when I got the distinct feeling that she wasn’t listening to me. Her eyes had seemed to glass over. it was only when I stopped talking at her that I could hear it. The muffled hissing sound that could only be Reilly wetting her diaper. Once she was done her hand felt around her pants looking for leaks. When she found none she shook it off and we continued walking and talking until we got to our respective classes. Reilly wearing diapers all the time didn’t last long however. For better or worst her parents would send her to school wearing normal underwear again in the hope that she would use the toilets at school. This turned out to be a fools errand. During this time she would come to school wearing dark stretchy pants that would hide accidents well when they happened. Most of the time when she was wearing these black pants her crotch area was some degree of wet, damp or stained with dried on pee from an accident no one had noticed. She acted like this was perfectly normal and saw no need to stop what she was doing when she would wet herself. More often than not it was left up to the teacher to tell her to go get changed because she wouldn’t go on her own. Reilly would always sit in the front row with the closest seat to the door. When she would inevitably wet herself the teacher would discretely walk towards her desk, whisper something in her ear and she would begrudgingly go to the office to get changed. Depending on the severity of the accident sometimes the teacher would have to call the janitor to clean up her seat and the floor underneath it. When she would come back she would come back to her seat wearing a baggy pair of men’s basketball shorts with a diaper on underneath. There was some snickering and pointing by the popular kids but most people new better than to out right make fun of the girl that just wet herself in class. On most days it seemed like she would show up for school wearing black pants, wet herself sometime in the first two hours then spend the rest of the day wearing those basketball shorts and the diaper. After about a month we were walking home from school and out of the blue I garnered up the courage to ask her why she was wetting her pants all the time. I thought she would be timid about it but she wasn’t. In fact she was stunned that it took as long as it did for me to ask her about it. This is when she opened up to me and told me about her life long fear of toilets and her decision not to use them no matter the cost. She told me that even the thought of sitting on a toilet induced a heavy panic attack that made her feel cold scared and so alone. She knew how nutty all that sounded but she couldn’t help it. So for the longest time when she felt like she had to pee she simply peed. She said that she used to over think it and get embarrassed but over time she stopped caring what other people thought about her. I was expecting her to say she had a small bladder or something else that was medical in nature like a birth defect of something. Well, in a way it was a medical issue. Her confession didn’t change how I felt about her. Over time I had developed a bit of a crush on the girl but I wasn’t ready to tell her that. At that age I was too naïve and immature to have a real girl friend. So we remained friends despite my feelings for her. One day while in class I could tell something was wrong with Reilly. She just seemed nervous and antsy so when she asked to be excused to use the restroom I knew something was wrong so immediately after she walked out of class I asked to use the restroom myself. I caught up to her quickly in the halls to ask her if she was okay. “Why are you following me?” she asked rather sharply. I stumbled over my words before I said the only thing that made sense. “I just wanted to check on you to see if you were okay. You seemed a little off in class.” She took a moment to process this and smiled politely. “I’m fine I just had a stomachache.” She said flipping her hair over her shoulder. It was then that I smelt it. She was already wearing her gym shorts for the day which meant she was wearing a diaper. A diaper that I now understood was full. Oh shit, I thought to myself. “well, do you feel better now?” I asked trying to lighten the mood. “I do actually. So you should get back to class little boy.” She said with a smirk as she opened the door to the nurses station to get cleaned up and changed. I couldn’t help but steal a glance at her bottom as she walked away from me. I could see her dirty diaper bulging outward through her shorts and swaying with every step she took until the door closed behind her. Ten minutes later when she came back to class. She flashed me a quick smile reassuring me that everything was okay as she took her seat and the day carried on as usual. By the time of the winter school dance there was only one girl that I wanted to take. When I asked Reilly to the dance she blushed bright red but said yes. But only as two friends going together not as a couple or like boy friend and girl friend she insisted. I didn’t really mind the conditions I was just glad that she had said yes. I had stopped listening after that. The night of the dance Reilly wore a cute white dress with pink lace wrapped around her waist and the trim of the dress. She looked really pretty. We danced hugged and laughed all night together. We may have entered that dance as just friends but we left as a couple. After winter break I noticed that Reilly no longer wore those black tights to class. Instead she wore normal pants and shorts that were a size or two to big for her with a diaper taped on underneath. While I tried not to bring attention to it I could always see the bulk and hear the faint crinkle of plastic when she would walk past me. It seemed like her parents had given up for now that Reilly would get over her fears and use the bathroom like everyone else because by all appearances Reilly wore and used diapers full time. I began to wonder if she even knew when she was wet or when it was time to change. There were a couple of times that I had to quietly make her aware of a leaking diaper that needed changing. She teased and said that maybe one day she would let me be the one to change her diapers. I giggled and blushed but secretly I wanted to do that more than anything. On some days when I’d walk her home she would invite me over to hangout at her house until her parents got home from work. On these days the first thing she would do was lock herself in the bathroom where she would change her wet diaper. A few minutes later she would emerge and we would watch tv or talk about school. It was on one of these days that my curiosity and hormones took over and when she took a seat next to me on the couch I flipped up the skirt that she was wearing and caught a glimpse of her diaper before she slapped my hand away. “What are you doing!?” She said playfully. I smiled. “I’m only making sure you put that on correctly and that you're not going to leak everywhere.” She saw through my bullshit pretty quickly. “ So you want to see my diaper huh?” “Well, only if it doesn’t bother you.” I replied not wanting to sound like to much of a pervert. She stood up and unbuttoned her skirt and stepped out of it leaving her only in her T-shirt diaper and sneakers and then sat down next to me to watch tv. I thought about putting some kind of move on her but I got nervous and shy. After a while it was time for me to go. My mom was always pretty good about having dinner on the table by 6:30 and it was already 6:25 and I was getting hungry. She got up and walked me to her door. Where she gave me a hug. When I was squeezed my arms around her I could feel warmth pressing against my thigh When I pulled away I looked down as her diaper worked to absorb her pee. It only took a minute for her diaper to go from dry and clean to soaked, discolored and sagging off of her hips. “oops! I think I’ve had an accident!” She said playfully grabbing at herself and laughing as she shut the door in my face. I simply laughed it off and went home thinking Reilly was a little nutty. The rest of my time with Reilly was somewhat of a blur of laughter and fun. We would continue to hang out after school and watch movies together on the weekends and eat dinner at each others houses from time to time. I never did get to see her diapers again or change her diaper like I wanted to. That was probably for the best because I’m sure that I would have messed it up somehow. During the last week of school she told me that her family was moving across town. Her dad had gotten some big time promotion and with it came a sign on bonus that was enough to move them to the rich side of town. I gave her my phone number scribbled on a post it note on the day they moved. When she saw it she smiled as she leaned in and gave me my first kiss and in a hushed whisper she said goodbye.

To the first part of your post I would say that you can find extremes in every fetish community but that would not accurately reflect how everyone in that community behaves. I would in fact say that most people would have the common decency not to involve others in their preferences. Overtly inappropriate or provocative behavior should never be deemed okay but as long as your behavior isnt disruptive to everyone else there should be no taboos and to a larger extent ABDL is still very taboo. I think what you said is true that people do see ABDL as predatory in nature and I would like to see that public perception change. I understand that to a large portion of this community this line of thinking doesn't make sense to you. You wear diapers and you don't give a damn what other people think about it. I am not there yet. I do care what people think. Deeply. I am tired of being viewed as some kind of deviant for having this desire that I have tried over and over again to walk away from but somehow I cannot. I quit smoking. I quit drinking. I quit being an asshole. I cannot however quit diapers. Wearing diapers is a part of who I am and I have come to realize this but i still crave the acceptance from friends and family that can only come from society's view on ABDL evolving from deviant and predatory to a more informed and accepting position. I am a glass is always half full kind of guy and I feel that at some point society as a whole will get there.

Being gay was treated as weird and a bit of a freak show. Unitl it wasn't. Being trans was treated as weird and a bit of a freak show. Until it wasn't. Positive media exposure has been proven to change hearts and minds. Show me a positive mainstream example of ABDL? I have not seen it yet and this is what I want.

Yes this is the point I am trying to make. I was more so refuring to widespread social acceptance. If you ask your average person at a bar if they are ABDL odds are that they will have no idea what you are even asking them. Obviously we are hyper aware of it but your average person if they know anything about abdl think it has something to do with children which it obviously to us does not. I understand the differences between gender identity and ABDL and I am not saying that they are the same I am simply talking about social awareness and acceptance but I am glad to have sparked a debate.

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about this particular kink and why choosing diapers as normal form of underwear isn't more widely excepted as a whole and I have come to the conclusion that given enough time that it will be and all stigmas associated with being ABDL will eventually go away. The only thing we need to get there is to have a celebrity presence who is openly ABDL. Think about the impact that Will & Grace had on the gay community. Or Caitlyn Jenner for the transgender community. It would take only one person to humanize our particular kink and make it socially acceptable. I have a middle school aged student in a very liberal city and as I walk through his school I see multiple signs posted on the walls saying "We accept all gender identities. All races. All nationalities." Et cetra. Before sending my student to outdoor school this year I got a packet on gender identity saying in essence that while the dorms are separated by sex, my child can choose which ever bunk and bathroom they identified with the most and that the same applied to the high school aged camp counselors. All of that is fine and well I support everyone's right to be who they want to be and overall this is a good thing but I cannot help but notice the stark contrast with my childhood experience. When I was in school D.A.R.E. posters lined all most all of the walls and sexual identity wasn't talked about at all. I did some more digging and I found a study that said about 1 million Americans are non gender conforming or about 1 out of every 250 people according to this study. That works out to about .04% of the US population. I know of course that these statistics are hard to quantify seeing as there are many people who are afraid to come out but this study did take that into consideration. Such a study on diaper paraphernalia to my knowledge does not exist but i'm sure that the findings would probably be lower but similar in the sense that we are talking about a small fraction of the overall population. Maybe 1 out of 300 to 400 would be my best guess but of course all i can do is guess. I was able to find a study on the prevalence of foot or feet related fetishes and it that said that it was estimated that 1.14% of the population has some sort of likening to feet. That number is more than double the amount of people who identify as non gender conforming. I would argue that most people are born with these desires whatever they maybe and have little choice in the matter. So why aren't there pictures of feet in my child's school? I feel that the answer to my question is one of lack of exposure. When I was a kid what Caitlyn Jenner did would have been unthinkable. So all it would take is one prominent figure who said "yep, I'm a foot person." Or "I'm a diaper lover." Someone who was relatable and open about their lifestyle that would instantly create awareness and liberal Hollywood and TV would be quick to embrace diversity and condemn any type of bigotry. People hate and fear what they do not understand and having someone humanize our lifestyle would instantly make it socially acceptable. Besides, I cannot think of a more harmless desire than choosing a different type of underwear.