In Diapers 1986

I'm willing to bet that IE6 is the reason you're having issues with some of the functionality on the site, especially with the emoticons box seemingly not appearing in the right place. IE6 doesn't play very nice with web design standards and doesn't always display pages correctly... and that's what this sounds like. And unfortunately, there is no fix for that other than upgrading the web browser.

You know, the term fat fetish bothers me. Basically because the term fat is used so loosely these days, which in turns leads to the question 'when does it start being a fat fetish rather than just liking larger ladies'. There's a real fuzzy line on that one. I wouldn't say I have a fat fetish, but I do like larger ladies.

Can't say that I've ever experienced the problems that they ran into whenever I've had to go to a hospital for something. Same goes for anyone in my family. Especially the whole 'take a number' to see the triage nurse thing. I've never encountered something like that before.

Ah, karma, how I hate thee. I was going to tell her tonight when she came to visit me... spend the day with shot nerves and going over in my head what I was going to tell her (took the advice not to do a letter or anything, and just tell her straight up). Only to find out that she isn't coming over in the end, because she came down with something and is feeling ill. Nothing major, but enough that doesn't want to leave her house. So now I'm a bundle of shot nerves... and have still made no gain in this endeavour.

The longest I've ever had to wait in a Canadian hospital was 5 hours. And that was when I got a cast wet and had to have it replaced. The hospital was also overloaded that night. The longest I've ever waited in a hospital in an emergency? Half an hour to an hour maximum, and I've had CT Scans done while I was in emerg without having to wait. Basically, I like the fact that if something happens to me beyond my control, at least I'm not going to be bankrupted seeking treatment to keep myself alive.

Now, just because I'm the type of person who likes to have thought out all aspects of something... does anyone have advice if it all goes south as well? Like I said, that outcome will get ugly for me real fast because of the mutual friends and whatnot, and I still want to be able to maintain some form of normalcy in my life afterwards if it falls apart. I'm also thinking about telling her in the form of a letter that I'll give her while I'm in the room with her... it'll allow me to at least get everything across coherently as I'm not sure how well I'll be able to break it to her while my heart is pounding like crazy in my chest.

Well, so far she's been really accepting of all my little quirks (things I do and say, etc), so hopefully that's a good sign. As well, I'd say the relationship is really stable... the only time she's been outright angry at me is when I ended up in hospital because I did something really stupid... and then added fuel to the fire by not telling her when it happened (she found out from friends). I'm still trying to figure out when would be the best time to bring this up and how to approach it, though. I tried explaining it to my mom when she found my stuff back when I lived at home and that didn't go over as well as I had hoped, which makes me apprehensive to do the explaining part again.

So I registered a few years ago, but have never actually posted in that time. Part of that being that shortly after I registered, I went through a purge cycle and decided I was going to get diapers out of my life. That lasted all of a year... then shortly after that I decided to purge again and that lasted until earlier this year. In the middle of the latest purge, I began dating a girl (we've been going out for nearly 8 months now)... and I never told her about this side of me since I was getting diapers out of my life for good. Yeah, funny how that works. Like everyone says, you can't ever really get rid of a part of you. But the dilemma is hitting now. Like all relationships, trust is a major part of it, and it tears me inside to have to hide this from her. I don't think she suspects that I'm hiding anything from her, but yeah. It's not giving me any piece of mind. I've come to accept finally that this side of me isn't going away, rather than just going yet another failed purge cycle. For me, this isn't completely a fetish... I mean, there is some fetish aspect (not that it affects a normal active relationship with my GF), but at the same time I only tend to wear diapers when I'm stressed out. And they do a great job helping to relieve stress and take me back to a simpler time. And if I tell her, that will be what I tell her... because getting her to wear diapers around me, or be a mommy, or anything like that isn't the goal. Of course, telling her just can't be that easy. I'm terrified of telling her and having her reject me because of this. I get the impression that she is somewhat open-minded... but I don't know if she's this open minded. Especially since the question will invariably come up on whether I use them... and I do for #1. Which I think would freak her out. Also making this difficult is the fact that we have a lot of mutual friends... some of her closest friends are good friends of mine as well, and one of them is also a roommate who doesn't know. If she didn't accept this and didn't want anything to do with me, the aftermath would be disastrous. I'm also terrified of word getting out that I even like diapers, because I think it would freak a lot of my friends out as well. In short, I don't want to keep a secret this big from her, because if she finds out later on by accident, it's only going to get worse. At the same time, I have no idea how to even approach this because of how complicated the web between my GF and all of our friends is.