Incontinence Desires and Indecisiveness

[indecisive12350]

Hi all.

A little over a year ago now, I began to suffer from OAB, which doctors believe was due to an untreated UTI that is now gone. This manifested largely with frequency issues that made my life fairly difficult. Prior to this, I knew I had an interest in dl, but only occasionally indulged it in a very light way.

Despite the OAB symptoms becoming way less intense, I still suffer from frequency issues, albeit only every hour or two, and very minor leakage after I use the bathroom or exercise. I don't have accidents, and my issues don't require protection at all (aside from maybe pads), but I believe this is largely because I do not get pushed very often. I don't go on long car trips, and often focus on making sure I go to the bathroom before going without access for any period longer than an hour. Irritants (like soft drink, coffee and alcohol), make my issues noticeably worse, which, as a result, I consume only when I know I have free access to a bathroom, which makes social occasions even more problematic than just making sure my bladder is empty.

My problem is, that I've found myself reading and thinking about untraining and incontinence, and can't seem to get away from thinking about it in the long-term. I believe this is due to the fact that, even without untraining, I still suffer from partial incontinence, and consequently think about it whenever my issues come to mind.

Though untraining offers some minor benefits (aside from indulging desire), such as not having to manage somewhat unpredictable continence issues through time management, and not having to worry about public accidents when I push myself (drink irritants, go for long drives etc), the potential consequences and my potential reaction to decreasing continence always nudge me away from untraining. I also know I do not want to lose bowel control, and have read that bladder untraining can have a direct affect on bowel control.

I've also read about spiralling, and am concerned I would be a likely candidate to spiral if I began to untrain (as my continence is already less than 100%, and I'm a fairly anxious person to begin with).

I've read about the binge purge cycle that a lot of people experience, and believe I am stuck in one.

I know a way of testing the waters would be to wear 24/7, which I have never done, and try to experience life as I would if I were dependent, but as far as I have gathered being diapered 24/7, even in the short term, can impact a person's continence if they are already on shaky ground to begin with (i.e. me), and also since I am not used to using diapers, much less 24/7, I would not be able to truly experience what it would be like without some training. Also, in experiencing it properly, I would need all the supplies and accessories needed for true untraining, like different clothing, plastic pants, different diapers, diaper bag, other supplies etc, which I do not have and would be useless unless I decided to go for it.

I was wondering if anyone had any insight into what made them choose to go down the path of untraining, especially younger people, and what factors or signs made them choose to do so.

Also, if anyone had any regrets following their untraining, or if they regretted certain parts about being incontinent.

note: I have gone down the path with a doctor and specialist and they believe that despite surgery possibly alleviating some of my symptoms, it is unlikely I will ever return to full continence and never having to manage bathroom breaks ever again.

Thanks.

[NightWitch]

It was an overactive bladder that lead me to being in pull-ups/diapers 24/7 for the last 7ish months. For the most part, it has been great. I still have a small degree of bladder control but it definitely takes effort to stay dry! I think what was really helpful to me was when someone pointed out that OAB is in fact a form of incontinence, so there is no shame in managing with diapers. So far I haven’t had any issues with #2. Reminding myself that I’m an incontinent person who is sometimes dry vs a continent person who is sometimes wet was also helpful. Ultimately it’s up to what feels comfortable and right to you! But it is sooo manageable if you decide to go that route. 

[Hannah YMS]

Your anxiety about going 24/7 is a valid one, but more people report that going 24/7 and managing their incontinence with full-time diapering is generally easier and better for their mental health than trying to find a bathroom all the time.

Only you can decide whether 24/7 is right for you, but there is some good news. If you can afford it, going 24/7 might offer you more freedom than not in the long run. You don't necessarily have to untrain like the rest of us, but since you're on the incontinence desires subforum, and since you have posted here, there seems to be in the back of your mind that you'd like to untrain.

With that said, again good news, is you can dabble in 24/7 and untraining for a bit of time and you can decide if it's worth it to you to do so or not. If I am any sort of model in the community for untraining, I can tell you that degrading your continence takes a long time. More than a year, at least. So there's no harm in trying different strategies for dealing with incontinence. And you don't have to necessarily untrain. Use the bathroom as you wish and when you can't, use your diaper. There's no shame in it. If pull-ups and pads work for you, then just do that. But something tells me you want to take it further. And again, many who do take it further report an increased happiness in their lives due to the reduced management of their incontinence. Your mileage may vary.

[Little Belle]

I was pretty much in your position in terms of incontinence when I decided to go 24/7. For me, it was totally the right decision and I love being an incontinent nappy wearer ?

I had a binge and purge about a year prior to that but I've now been 24/7 for over a year.

I would say it took about 4 months for me to feel like I was totally incontinent during the day and nearly a year for night time wetting to kick in. This is obviously quicker than untraining when 100% continent at the start but it was still plenty of time to gauge if the lifestyle felt right.