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Tracking System Part 1-7

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Just a quick conversation between two mothers


Tracking System


“So, why did you put Aiden back into nappies?”


“He’s started too early with attitude. I expected that when he approached his teens... you know... he’d get disrespectful and clever, but at ten.... I don’t think so.”

“It’s that school, quite a few of the kids there seem to have an attitude... especially the boys who behave like brats. I don’t think the place has heard of discipline.”

“Well maybe but I’m not having my son coming home and displaying that insolence.”

“So, how did you do it?”

“Well, ever since he was potty trained at three, and changed from nappies to briefs, I’ve only ever bought him one style.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve only ever let him wear little white briefs... tighty-whities some people call them but I insisted that they were what all growing boys wore.”

“And he believed you?”

“Most boys at kindergarten and infants wore colourful kid’s pants, which he also wanted. But, I told him that they were fine for little kids but he was growing up fast and older boys wore only white briefs. He liked to think of himself as being older than he was.”

“Big boy briefs, clever... but haven’t you encouraged him to be just that... a Big Boy?”

“True, and I still do but not at the moment. He’s going to be grown-up for a really long time and I’d like to have him still my little boy for a while longer.”

“Oh you’re very complicated... and confusing... so why put him white briefs..?”

“Well, I’ve always thought that white briefs looked like nappies anyway.”

“Now you mention it...”

“I think... white briefs and trunks make them think they’ve grown up but basically... they’d much rather still be in nappies... so they’re just a substitute. When I see Aiden wearing his white undies... it always brings back memories of him in a nappy... which is what got me thinking.”

“Mmmm maybe... So, how did that help get him back into...?”

“I always made sure he wears his little white pants to school and under his pjs at night. This means I can keep constant track of his bodily functions because, although he’s potty trained, his little white briefs tell me another tale.”

“Do tell.”

“Well, boys being boys are not the cleanest or most fastidious of toilet goers. They leave drips and dribbles, smears and well, all manner of fluids in their pants. They never even think about it, or have any qualms about not keeping their bodily secretions in the appropriate place... the toilet.”

“Isn’t that what undies are for?”

“Well yes but... I needed to teach my boy a lesson... although I wanted to be subtle I didn’t want him to think that’s what it was.”

“I see, so his messy white briefs let you know just how negligent he’s been.”

“Precisely... they are a simple and unobtrusive tracking system”

“But why did you want him to be back in nappies... I mean surely it means more work for you?”

“He’s at that age where being belligerent, thinks he knows best and refuses to listen are the traits of a boy growing up. However, a quick reality check and a slice of humility by showing him he’s still just a little boy will, I anticipate, get him to tow-the-line and respect me. Not so much Jim, he’s always got on better with his father, but his off-handedness and rudeness towards me is going to stop.  After all, he still relies on us for everything and he needs to know he can’t just do or say what he pleases.”

“I understand what you mean. I wish I’d taken a firmer hand with my kids. Still, it does seem a little harsh.”

“I wanted to peg back that defiance early enough by making him realise just how dependent on us he really is.”

“But, how did that get him back into nappies?”

“Well, every morning, when he changed his underwear, I’d check the laundry basket. His pjs and underpants especially have been getting worse... and more than a little damp in the morning. I knew he would be embarrassed if I confronted him so I waited until he had no option than to take up my suggestion.”

“Oh, I see... what was it he had no option to do?”

“Well, he wants to go on a school trip. They’re going to France for two weeks in the summer break and he’s desperate to go.”

“That sounds nice.”

“It’s a nice idea but... I produced his wet and mucky undies and simply told him I wasn’t convinced I trusted him not to make a mess whilst away. I told him that I wasn’t going to be embarrassed by a boy who couldn’t keep his pants clean and I didn’t want him to embarrass himself by other’s witnessing his filthy undies.  He was so embarrassed when I held up several pairs of his stained briefs... poor boy didn’t know where to put himself. I was firm and told him that I’d only let him go on the trip when I was convinced he could keep his underwear clean for a week.”

“I bet.”

“He was flustered, apologetic, off hand, argumentative and making excuses but I zoned in on his awkwardness and simply said NO... I was not satisfied and until I was he was going nowhere.”

“So, how did you get a ten year-old back into nappies?”

“I told him that I thought his briefs were not robust enough to take the damage he was inflicting every night and that I intended putting him back into nappies until I was sure.”

“Oh I bet that didn’t go down well.”

“No, he screamed blue murder at me but I was patient and reasonable... letting him know that I was mainly worried about his nocturnal emission as they appeared to be getting worse. I don’t actually think they were but highlighted just how damp and messy his morning pants were.  I stressed that I understood he had no control when asleep, so I was prepared, if he met me half way, to just make wearing a nappy a condition of his sleeping arrangements rather than day time as well.”

“Did he consent?”

“He was dead against it but I told him that if he was worried what people might think I was prepared to explain to his father that his son still messed his underwear and that’s why I needed him to wear a nappy.”

“Didn’t his father know?”

“Jim doesn’t really know what’s going on he’s too embroiled with work but Aiden and he are the best of friends...”


“He seemed relieved his father didn’t know, which I hoped would be the case, so I inferred that I wouldn’t tell him providing he wore protection at night. Either that or, if he felt I was being unreasonable, he could discuss the arrangement with his dad.”

“Did you suspect he’d be too humiliated to speak to Jim about it?”

“I knew he would... so I said I hadn’t told his father but if he didn’t do as I suggested I was quite happy to let him know. But, and I stressed this... I thought it would be in his own interest to get such an easy problem to solve.... solved.”

“Ah clever...”

“He promised that he’d be a lot more careful but I said I’d given him loads of time to sort himself out, years in fact, but now was time to make it happen if he wanted to spend time away.  So, either he could just get on with wearing a nappy at night or, we could discuss his messy pants with his father and see what he had to say. I implied that I was sure his dad would insist on him wearing protection all day, every day.”

“I bet he wasn’t happy.”

“No but the idea scared him enough so that he wears a nappy every night now... and has done for a couple of weeks.”

“Mmmm that long... but how?”

“I just made sure that after the first night in a nappy... he woke up soaked.”

“You cunning thing.”

“He’s quite a heavy sleeper so getting him to ‘wet’ his nappy wasn’t that difficult.”

“Sleeping pills?”

“A couple... and a glass of water.”

“What was his reaction to waking up soaked?”

“I turned the tables...  making it look like I was angry with him, claiming that he was just trying it on and accused him of wetting on purpose just to prove a point. He of course denied it.”

“You have my admiration.”

“I told him that I knew things were getting worse because of the state of his pjs and undies and thank god we reacted quickly enough. So he had no option but to wear them the following night and guess what...”

“Another accident?”

“You bet. However, I was more conciliatory and praised him for at least wearing protection... I thought that was the responsible thing to do but I wanted him to wear plastic pants as well from then on. He didn’t want to but was much too distraught to argue about that.”

Slowly, slowly catchee monkey... eehh?”

“On the fourth morning I made sure it was his father who discovered his wet son.”

“I bet that didn’t go down well.”

“No, both were embarrassed but Aiden couldn’t deny it and his father wanted to know what was going on. I explained to Jim privately that I tried to keep it secret for Aiden’s sake that he was wetting the bed... again.”


“Yes I implied that this wasn’t the first time but that I’d kept that secret from him too though things had gotten worse recently so I had to make the ‘nappy’ decision.”

“Very clever.”

“Mmmm, I said I didn’t want to put any type of wedge between them as I knew he looked up to Jim and was quite embarrassed about the entire thing... so...  thought it best to try and keep it confidential for everyone sake. But now it was out...”

“Was Jim on-board? I bet he was on Aiden’s side wasn’t he?”

“Actually, he was very supportive. He blamed himself for being too involved with work and not taking notice of home life. He was very sympathetic with me for the extra laundry and work I must have had to put up with (I didn’t mention that never happened I simply let him assume). He thought I’d handled it pretty well and told Aiden that he was proud he’d decided on wearing a nappy as it was doing a terrific job.”

“So Jim now knows... what’s his thought on Aiden... you know...  wearing a nappy.”

“Well, that’s the good thing. As far as Jim is aware it’s only because of his bedwetting that Aiden is in nappies. So, he’s told him that as long as he keeps wearing protection until I’m satisfied he can go back to simply wearing pjs, (that is he stops his night time wetting) he’s happy for him to go on this trip to France. However, if he argues or gives me any grief on the subject he won’t be going.”

“Has he accepted the nappy completely?”

“He acted up a bit when I started pegging his nappies and rubber pants out on the washing line to dry. He was very unhappy but I said that if he wanted me to stop then I needed something from him and that was to be in his night time protection by 7.30 each and every night. I told him I wanted a regular routine and not just when he ‘felt like it’.”

“Getting some of your power back eh?”

“Definitely, I did say he could go out after but I wanted him in protection no later than that time. I also let him know that I never mentioned his mucky and disgusting underwear, so, as far as his father’s concerned, it was just the bedwetting he has to deal with. I threatened to tell Jim about that and was sure he’d have more to say on the subject.”

“Did he agree?”

“Surprisingly yes. I think it was mainly the thought of his mates knowing he had to wear a nappy that swung it. It was the least upsetting compromise for him... seeing as he was wearing a nappy to sleep in anyway.”

“Do you make sure he wears...?”

“Yes, but Jim asked if I wanted him to do his bit... I just smiled and said I didn’t want to embarrass the boy any further and that I’d see to him. However, I’ve made sure he wakes up wet most mornings so I’ve mentioned that occasionally I’d be grateful if he’d check.”

“That’s good.”

“Yes, Jim’s very good because he heaps praise on him whether he’s wet or not... he sees it as something Aiden needs and therefore has to wear one. He’s very positive because he doesn’t want his son to feel in the least bit ashamed about it.”

“But he must feel ashamed... doesn’t he?”

“Oh yes, he’s completely docile in the mornings now.”

“So, is the nappy now the thing that tracks his toilet habits?”

“Yes, but perhaps the strange thing is his nappies are messier than his undies ever were. It’s like he wants to use the thing even if he thinks he doesn’t.  It’s got him so he’s not sure about anything and is quite humiliated.”

“Shame, embarrassment, anxiety and wearing a nappy - that’s quite a list to control.”

“I see the poor boy’s bewildered face every morning. He’s so embarrassed at the nappy check but has got used to me doing that now. However, I won’t let him sort himself out it has to be either his father or me that takes it off for him.”

“I bet.”

“The rustle of plastic pants down his legs and then the examination of the wet fabric leave’s him mute with embarrassment. He doesn’t dare speak. It’s as if he’s decided that until he’s in the bathroom and getting cleaned up, he has no say in what’s happening. Which he hasn’t”

“Will he be going to France?”

“Oh, no chance and he’s stopped mentioning it. There’s no real improvement is there? I mean... he doubts himself because of his reliance on that night time padding.”

“Which you’re helping him fill?”

“At the moment I’m only having him wet a few times a week but over the next few days he’ll be doing a lot more than that. In the end, I think he’ll be too self-conscious to want to be with his school mates in any situation... he’ll be far too dependent on his nappy.”

“Well of course, accidents will happen.”

“Yes they will. So, a summer of plastic pants and thick nappies 24/7 is what I’ve lined up for him. The first couple of weeks of the school break he’ll come camping with us... and we can both keep an eye on our suddenly incontinent little boy.”

“Won’t Jim be suspicious?”

“Maybe but I’ll let him know I’ve been anticipating this for a while; ever since he wet the bed all those months ago that I’ve seen a steady decline. I’ll tell him that, according to the experts, it’s not an uncommon phase for boys to go through and that they usually ‘snap’ out of it just as suddenly as they slip into it. But it’s nothing to worry about as we’ve got it covered.”

“You’re taking chances and making an awful lot of work for yourself.”

“Yes I know but, when your son suddenly thinks he’s independent and a man but you know better... it’s time to let him know he’s really just a little kid.”

“Oh that reminds me... here are the new vinyl pants I told you about. A bit childish I know but they’re very strong.”

“Thanks very much. Oh yes, these are large enough and I love these cute little cartoon characters.”

“Are you sure you’ll be able to get him to wear them?”

“They’re the only ones I’ll take. So, together with the disposables they will be better for him as I’m sure he wouldn’t want the tent surrounded by drying fabric nappies. However, if he prefers them I’ll let him know I’m happy for him wear what he’s used to.”

“Cunning, you seem to have this well sorted.”

“For the summer holidays at least he’s going to be our little boy in nappies and, together with the new childish shorts I’ve bought for him and these plastic pants he’ll look the part. However, he won’t know about all this until his first change at the campsite and by then it will be too late.”  

“He’s not going to like that.”

“I intend to be there for my little boy and give him what he needs at this crisis in his life... a crisis I’ve told his father I saw coming. Jim will be with me on this because I’ll emphasise how grateful I am for his support of our son. However, should Aiden complain, I’ll point out that the more fuss he makes the more attention he’ll bring on himself... so... the best way is to follow our instructions and no one need be any the wiser.”

“Are you sure you can make this work for any length of time?”

 “Not really but he won’t have any option... he’ll be pissing or crapping his nappy so often he’ll just be relieved and eager to have a clean disposable to slip into. By then I’ll have got him at a point where he’s unsure of his standing and that maybe his parents know what’s best for him.”

The chink of wine glasses and laughter


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Correct, you should never take mummy for granted or underestimate their resourcefulness. If she wants her little boy back... that's just what she's going to get. :309209366acc6cd36530697f37ceded0:

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Four weeks later

“I see you’re back... so, how did it go?”

“Fine, fine, not how I anticipated the holiday would go but...”

“I saw Aiden rush from the car... couldn’t seem to get home quick enough.”

“Yes, well, the poor lad has been soaked the entire drive back. I’d run out of disposables so couldn’t change him. I think he couldn’t wait to get out of his sodden nappy and into...”

“Oh, so, he’s still wearing them then?”

“Of course, I got him just about used to them before we set off and was grateful for them whilst away... bless him.”

“Hhhhuuummm... so what was it like?”

“We had a lovely spot overlooking the lakes and Jim had a daily regime of activities so we were all kept pretty busy.”

“You had good weather for it.”

“Yes, last Tuesday and Wednesday we had rain but otherwise... sun, sun, sun. It was very beautiful up there. Have you ever been to the Lakes District?”

“Only on a day trip many years ago. My lot only want a holiday in the sun these days so it’s the Mediterranean for our annual break.”

“Jim loves camping, it brings out the old Boy Scout in him... he used to be a troop leader as a teenager and I don’t think he’s ever got over his love of an outdoor lifestyle.”

“So, back to the main item on the agenda... have you got your little boy back then?”

“I’ve never seen him so happy.”

“You sound shocked.”

“Well, I was at first because I foresaw problems but... bless his daddy... Jim had him running around doing stuff and he seemed to enjoy it. I don’t mind camping but those two together were having a whale of a time. I couldn’t help but enjoy watching them as they went from one project to another or on some mission of discovery, as Jim called it. They hiked, fished, rowed boats and even did a bit of water-skiing... all very healthy.”

“Very nice but what I meant was did he like his nappy and plastic pants, did he like being your little boy again...?”

“Well, not really my little boy... he and his father have become even better mates so much so that now daddy changes his soaked nappy.”

“Didn’t Jim have anything to say about the cartoon pants or childish disposables?”

“He didn’t think twice about them... they were what we had so they were what Aiden was put in. I don’t think it even crossed his mind.”

“Didn’t Aiden rebel?”

“Well he was very suspicious when I changed him the first time and I could tell by his look on his face he was about to say something. That is until Jim looked in during the wipe down and said how fantastic he thought his more colourful nappies looked... and... get this... with a conspiratorial wink said to him he wouldn’t mind some like it for himself.”

“You’re joking.”

“No, no I’m not. That one encouraging wink took any argument away and, even when I pulled up his new little blue shorts and he sat there on the back seat looking extremely well-padded, he never uttered a word of complaint.”

“You’ve got him well trained.”

“I don’t think so... I think it’s just that now he’s receiving daddy’s approval all the time.... it seems that having to wear a nappy is not a problem.”

“Bloody hell.”

“After I’d got him changed and he looked a bit grumpy I saw Jim whisper something in his ear. Whatever he said certainly changed that frown around and a moment of possible argument passed.”

“I wonder what he said.”

“I don’t know... I thought Aiden looked just perfect; his thick disposable, plastic pants and boyish shorts were just as I wanted him for this holiday. Now with a smile on his face I have to admit I just melted... I forgot the reason I was doing this to him as a sort of punishment for being surly and growing up too fast. He was my sweet little boy again.”

“So, the humiliation you were hoping for him to suffer, after a quiet word from his father, just didn’t happen eh?”

“Yes, and another thing Jim did once we’d got the tent pitched and everything set up. He changed out of his chinos and wore a pair of blue shorts... hell they could have been brothers.”

“Did you expect that?”

“Not at all. I know when he goes hiking Jim wears shorts if the weather’s nice but I thought he only had khaki ones. Anyway, I have to say he looked great in them, very sexy and thankfully, they weren’t as short as Aiden’s... that might have been too much.”

“So you have too little boys now?”

“Well yes and no... with Aiden yes... but what I have got is a husband that I’d been failing to appreciate... he has been supportive and dependable. I don’t know if it’s because of the camping and being out and about but without the shackles of work, Jim has become another person. We’ve become more of a family again and I hadn’t realised how much we’d got into a rut until this camping expedition. It was great fun and made more so by Jim being the life and soul of everything we did together. Actually, I noticed that he was getting quite a lot of eyeballing from many of the other women on the site... he did look particularly sexy in his shorts... very manly and athletic.”

“Oh love, are you falling for your husband all over again?”

“I can’t tell you just how attentive and thrilling our nights have been. Once we had Aiden asleep and in his own part of the tent... Jim had me all over the campsite (blush). It was truly wonderful and I’m embarrassed to say that we never did that even when we first met.”

“I hope you were discreet around your little boy.”

“The poor lad was usually worn out with all the stuff he and Jim were doing together and out like a light by around nine most nights. So, once we got him into his night time protection and settled we’d sit out under the stars, have a few glasses of wine and decide where we were going to do it next. It was naughty and stimulating... I need a holiday to get over this one.”

(Self-conscious giggling)

“Was Aiden still wetting every night?”

“Yes and as I told you before we left, he used them even when I didn’t give him anything to help... and not just at night... we had a wet nappy to deal with most of the time.”

“Has it got out of hand?”

“Not out of hand because it’s what I’d hoped for but... it doesn’t worry him when he wets. He’ll happily tell his daddy who’ll do the honours and have him cleaned up and in a fresh disposable in minutes. He’s always patting him on his padded bottom as if encouraging him... I actually think that Aiden likes wearing them now. I have to admit each morning when we check and he’s lying there wearing just a t-shirt and his bloated plastic pants, I see my vulnerable little baby and I get all motherly.”

“Well you’re allowed to... you are his mother.”

“Yes I know but... I mean... broody.”

“What you want another kid?”

“Maybe, but the way we’ve have been going at it... I wouldn’t be surprised if...”

“Well that’s a turn up... do you think that’s what’s behind all this in the first place?”

“Hummm, I didn’t think so but maybe. I mean perhaps that’s what Jim’s picked up on... but we’ve never discussed having another. We’ve taken no precautions so he must know there’s a chance.”

“I have to say that would explain quite a lot.”

“Mmmmm I was thinking about that all the way back and I more or less came to the same conclusion.”

“(Laughter) I suppose changing so many nappies has got you back into practice.”

“Yes, and I have to tell you. Before going away it was almost impossible for me to get even a smile out of Aiden. Now, well the photographs of our trip have him smiling and laughing in just about every shot... even with me. Any resentment that was there has disappeared. His little pants barely contained his nappies but he didn’t make a fuss, even when he was out playing with some of the other kids on the site. Not so much as a sulk.”

“Didn’t the other kids react then?”

“If they did he never said anything but as I say, he was using them so I suppose he thought he needed them... which he does.”

“So, will he be staying in his protection?”

“I can’t see why not... he looks so cute. I love the way he asks to be changed and whether it’s Jim or I that do it... he seems so grateful. I have got my little boy back and I think Jim likes it that way as well. They’re as thick as thieves and Jim has said he’ll be paying more attention to home life because, with work, he thought he’d missed out on Aiden growing up so was pleased to re-connect.”

“Oh there’s Aiden now on his bike.”

“AIDEN, Aiden, come over here love and say hello to Mrs Parsons.”

“Hello Mrs Parsons how are you?”

“Very well... you look all very healthy... did you enjoy your camping trip love?”

“Yes thank you... Daddy said we might go off again soon.”

“Well that would be fun. Okay sweetheart... are you going to meet up with friends?”


“Okay, well don’t be too late back... your tea will be ready about five.”

“Okay, bye. Bye Mrs Parsons.”

“Well, there’s no doubt he’s still wearing his nappy. I could see the nice bulge and plastic pants down the leg of his shorts.”

“Jim must have changed him.”

“I have to admit... he certainly does look cute and the surliness you mentioned only a few weeks ago seems to have disappeared.”

“I know. Perhaps you should get your two wearing nappies it might do wonders for your stress levels.”

“God if only! I’m not sure how I’d get a fifteen and thirteen year-old back into them... any suggestions?”

“Just make it so they don’t have a choice.”



****** #####  ##### ##### ******

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Six weeks later

“Well, I’ve managed to get Kevin back into a nappy at night.”

“So, success with the thirteen year-old but what, is Geoffrey not responding to your ‘ideas’?”

“He looks at his brother and says that at fifteen he’d never wear a nappy even if he was pissing himself in the street... so far he’s resisted all my ‘ideas’.”

“I wasn’t sure you were going through with it.”

“I wanted to, I thought it would teach my kids some respect, but then seeing your Aiden’s padded little bum out and about and I have to say it made me want the same for my boys.”

“So how easy was it to get Barry on your side?”

“Not at first but I simply told him that either he gets on board or he can do the laundry from now on.”

“I bet he didn’t like that.”

“No but, once he realised that Kevin was wetting the bed insisted that he wore protection at night. He can manage him but not Geoffrey... that’s another matter.”

“So are they both soaking the bed?”

“Kevin does ‘trickle’ every night, so he’s easier to manage but Geoffrey’s quite sneaky and spasmodic.”

“How come?”

“Not sure whether he’s tumbled what I’m up to but he’s very wary about what he drinks last thing at night when I make the family cocoa.”

“So, what was the first move to get Kevin into nappies?”

“Well, as they share a bedroom, that first morning when he woke up wet I accused Geoffrey of playing a trick and chucking a glass of water over his sleeping brother.”

“Nice beginning.”

“Mmmm, I thought so and I wanted it to look good so I went in heavily and accused Geoffrey of being a thoughtless idiot who should know better.”

“I see where you’re going with this.”

“I shouted at him, whilst I tried to placate the poor distraught lad but he was also fuming at his brother, convinced he must have done it (or perhaps hoped to put the blame elsewhere).”

“How did that go?”

“Well, eventually I had to change him out of his pyjamas and I checked his bed and told him that it was actually pee and that he had wet the bed.”

“How did he take this ‘shocking’ news?”

“He was in tears, telling me it must have been an accident, he was sorry and he wouldn’t do it again.”

“That’s good.”

“Yes, I told him not to worry sometimes these things happen, especially to clever boys about his age as there’s a lot of hormones and stuff changing his body.”

“Good, good, nice laying the foundations.”

“Anyway, we both apologised to Geoffrey for accusing him but he got all high and mighty and nastily suggested that accident or not ‘Baby Kevin’ should wear nappies if he was going to wet the bed.”

“Doing the job for you eh?”

“Later, I confided in Geoffrey that I suspected his brother might be going through some things. I left it as vague as possible, but that if it happened again, he would be put into nappies and plastic pants at night if for no other reason than to stop any smell of pee permeating their room.”

“Was he okay with that?”

“He thought it was a splendid suggestion... and I think the devil in him took over and, from the huge grin that spread across his face, liked the idea of his little brother being returned to nappies.”

“So someone’s on your side.”

“Well, I knew Kevin was listening in to our conversation and bless him he came running in crying and begging not to be put back into nappies. I tried to placate him saying I’m sure it was a one off and he shouldn’t worry and patted his underpants clad bum thinking... in a few day’s this little botty is going to be wearing thick padding.”

“So, did he wet the following night?”

“No, the opportunity just didn’t present itself for me to doctor his drink. However, the following night it did and he woke up soaked.”

“The opportunity arose?”

“Yes and it should have worked on Geoffrey as well but he didn’t say anything just watched as I helped his brother out of bed and into the bathroom to get cleaned up.”

“Do you think it didn’t work or is he just a bit clever at hiding it?”

“Well he was dressed and had peeled off Kevin’s bedding and had ‘helpfully’ put it to wash by the time I saw him having breakfast.”


“Yes but I thanked him for being so thoughtful and he seemed pleased he’d helped me out. However, after he went out I checked his bed and there was a slight dampness to his sheets and I noticed his pyjamas weren’t there. Of course, after the washing had finished its spin, there they were mixed in with the bedding.”

“Did you confront him about them?”

“Oh yes, but very gently and he said he must have picked them up with the bedding by mistake when he’d taken stuff to wash.”

“Not very convincing.”

“No but I said okay and let it pass.”

“So was Kevin in for a surprise when he went to bed that night?”

“Yes, but I made Barry do the dirty work and make him wear his ‘new’ night time protection.”

“How did you get him to do that?”

“I told him that I was worried that I didn’t have the authority he had to make it happen. Kevin would just refuse and we’d end up arguing and in the end, his dad would still have to come up and make it happen under threat of... whatever.”

“Good move.”

“I said that after that first time I’d see to Kevin in future but he had to be the one to lay down the law.”

“Did it work?”

“After a while yes. I could hear the arguments and tears from Kevin pleading with his dad not to be put in a nappy but, bless him, Barry told him it was only a temporary measure and that it was not only for his own good. He had to think of all the washing I had to do, the smell in the bedroom and of course his brother, who, apparently at that moment popped in and told his younger brother that if he didn’t wear one he’d tell all his mates that he wet the bed... so it was his choice.”

“Good heaven’s Geoffrey’s doing the job for you.”

“(Laugh) I suppose he is but I think he’s just deflecting. Anyway, that threat seemed to work because once he’d calmed down Barry got him into his protection and into his pyjamas. He then said, as it was only around eight that he could come down and watch tele until nine if he wanted.”

“I bet he was a bit uncomfortable.”

“Well, after Barry told him his thick nappy was hardly noticeable and only the family would know about it, he did appear looking a little shy and unsure. However, I have to also say that he immediately came and sat by my side and before too long was happy for me to cuddle him. Something he’d refused to do for about three years.”

“Good, it was the same way with my boy. Although Kevin’s three years older, Aiden was the same once he was wrapped in thick padding. I think a nappy gives a boy the excuse he wants to be mothered again... or is that wishful thinking?”

“Whatever it is I have to say I was quite amazed and, not a moment’s argument when at nine he was told bed time. We’ve quarrelled nearly every night since he was ten about when he felt he should be able to go to bed. It was a turn up and no mistake.”

“So, that’s the youngest.”

“Yes, I’ve drilled it home that whilst he has these ‘problems’, which aren’t his fault, he can expect this treatment every night but that his brother will check on him if he thinks he can wriggle out of them.”

“So you’re using Geoffrey as a spy?”

“No, I haven’t asked him I’ve just inferred it to Kevin to keep him on track. I’ve also piled his nappies, plastic pants, oils and powder on his dresser as a not so subtle reminder... although I just told him it’s just a handy place to leave them.”

“Is Geoffrey happy about that?”

“I think he feels as long as it’s not him he isn’t bothered.”

“But you still intend to get him into night time...”

“That’s still my goal but for the moment I, like you, am enjoying having my little boy back because I can’t remember the last time he was so loving and dependent on me. He even lets his dad change him and last weekend I managed to coerce him into wearing a nappy the entire time.”

“Well done, how did you do that?”

“He’d crapped in his nappy on the Friday night, which was quite a shock for him, though not for me, so I insisted that to be on the safe side, he should take extra precautions. He was so ashamed and anxious that he didn’t take that much persuading.”

“Aww sweet thing.”

“Yes he is. He clung to my hand all the time we were out and I just loved knowing he had a thick nappy and glossy white plastic pants under his shorts.”

“You’ve not got him into the ones Aiden now wears then... the cartoon ones?”

“No, I don’t think his dad would approve of them but he doesn’t mind the shiny white or see-thru style I have for him...”

“It is thrilling isn’t it... to see your teenager return to that little boy you missed so much?”

“Yes, I’ve really gotten to love his padded little bum pottering around every morning.”

A week later

“I’ve got Geoffrey in night time nappies now.”

“Oh, well done how did you manage that?”

“The silly lad decided that he could take the mickey out of his brother and embarrass him in front of his friends. His dad had always said that what Kevin wore should be kept in the family and if Geoffrey reneged on that deal, he’d be subjected to the same discipline.”

“So what happened?”

“Simple really, I got Barry worked up that his eldest son was not only disrespecting his words, he was positively enjoying flouting his authority and needed to be taken down a peg or two.”

“How the hell did he get a fifteen year-old to submit to the rule?”

“When Barry told him what was going to happen he got all cocky and said it would never happen. Then he got the shock of his life when his dad took off his belt and threatened him with a severe beating... something neither of us had done to either of our kids before.”

“Ohh Christ, that wasn’t what you planned.... was it?”

“Well no. I was just hoping that over a few wet nights he’d come to realise what was best for him. However, I let Barry know of my suspicions that our eldest had been messing his underwear at night for a while now. So, thought it appropriate that if one of our boys was wearing a nappy to prevent soaked bedding, then so should the other.”

“Was your husband really furious?”

“Yes, he really laid into the poor lad, with words not the belt, accusing him of being a sly liar, making out he didn’t have the same wetting problem as his brother.  He asked him outright if he wet the bed. He made it clear that if he lied to him he’d be in serious trouble so through tears Geoffrey admitted he had... on several occasions.”

“How did Barry take that confession?”

“Well he already knew from me but he wanted him to admit it, which through an avalanche of tears he did.”

“What then?”

“Barry lessened his threatening stance and simply told him that if his brother had to wear a nappy at night then he didn’t see why he shouldn’t. He then asked if he disagreed with that assessment. Through even more sobbing and pleading, which his dad simply refused to accept, he reluctantly agreed... so Barry made him strip there and then.”

“He obviously meant business.”

“Well I suppose after he’d got the confession it was a matter of action - Geoffrey was in no fit state to complain. In the end, the tirade and possibility of a beating, plus he was so shocked that his father now knew he’d wet the bed and had tried to hide that fact. So, I suppose, from fright or a new respect for his father... he let him put him in a nappy like Kevin, complete with plastic pants.  His father had been furious with him on so many levels the poor boy didn’t know which tactic to take, so in the end, was just paralysed by fear. Barry then told him not to even think of taking them off until he told him he could and Kevin would tell him if he tried.”

“One scared and chastised young man then?”

“I haven’t seen Geoffrey so cowed and subservient for over five years so perhaps it was something administered not before time.”

“These days a bit of threatened corporal punishment is always a shock to a boy’s system if it’s something they’ve never experienced before.”

“Yes, now if only I can get him to shit himself... I can demand he wears a nappy all the time like his ‘baby’ brother.”

“He’s not going to like that.”

“No, but with his dad being more supportive of my suggestions the less he is allowed to get away with anything.”

“Still, between you both...”

“Yes, I’m not sure I’m overly happy with our parenting skills at the moment... it’s all been a bit fraught but, the main thing is, both our boys now sleep in nappies at night and, both boys are wet in the mornings so... as far as Barry’s concerned... the nappies stay.”


“It’s been a bit a bit of a slog... and on occasions I’ve wondered why I’m doing this...”

“Look, don’t feel guilty. You know your boys need a break on their growing-up and let’s face it... a nappy is going to be the least of their problems as they get older.”

“Thanks. Oh, have you got any news... Aiden okay... Jim still being attentive?”

“Oh yea... I’m pregnant... eight weeks gone.”


“Bloody hell that is news... how long were you planning on not letting on?”

“I’ve thought for a month or so I might be but I got a scan yesterday so, apart from Jim, you’re the first to know.”

“Well congratulations... how does Jim feel about having a baby at this stage?”

“He’s over the moon. Loves the idea and reckons I’ve been using Aiden for practice.”

“Not far wrong I would suspect.”

“No, but as I pointed out, he’s also been getting plenty of practice in changing him... and... they’ve been spending loads of quality time together... so...”

“What did he say to that?”

“He laughed and said ‘SNAP’.”


“Yes, I’ve seen the tenderly way he folds Aiden’s nappies, and strokes in appreciation those cute plastic pants. I think that now our sweet boy is back, he doesn’t dislike the situation.”

“I like Jim - you know you’ve got a keeper there don’t you? He’s good-looking and obviously knows his wife inside out.”

“I’m sure he’s played along for his own reasons as well.”

“Oh... maybe?”

“We’ve both noticed the change in Aiden since he now wears a nappy all the time he’s become such a loving little lad and I think we both know that has to be good... well... it’s good for us.”

“So, no getting into Big Boy undies for him in the near future.”

“Absolutely not. He still occasionally wakes up soaked so that hasn’t changed and whilst we have him docile and not complaining about having to wear padding... he’ll continue to wear what we put him in.”

“Well in that case, I hope to do the same for my two.”

“Here’s a suggestion, take away their PJs or whatever else they wear to bed. Make sure they wear the same style of padding and plastic pants, change them together and get them to bed at the same time. “

“Why do you suggest that?”

”Two things: I just think you’ll have less trouble, especially if you have Barry there to make sure they don’t argue. Once they get used to your authority, they’ll be more inclined to do as they’re told even if they resent the measure you are taking. They won’t feel able to complain if their parents are acting as one... and the other sibling is not being treated any differently”

“And the other thing?”

“Well, it’ll make it easy to keep track of things. Besides, you’ll enjoy seeing your boys wearing their pristine nappies to go to bed in and observe their full soaked and expanded plastic pants in the morning... it’s such a wonderful sight. I’d also make it so that they only get changed after breakfast so you see the boys sitting at the table in their full plastic pants... just to get them used to being seen and not being ashamed of having to wear them”

“I can see them objecting to that.”

“Well, all the more reason to pursue it. The more they get used to it the better it will be in the long run. You can tell them you need to keep a track of their ‘problem’.”

“Tracking their morning habits... that makes sense.”

“Inspecting their morning change will keep you up to speed on just what your boys are getting up to. It will make it easier for you to change any of their food or drink should you feel they are failing in some area of their ‘diet’ which might need to be steered in an alternative direction.”


“Tell me again why we’re doing this to our boys?”

“Because we know a boy needs his mummy to look after him, no matter how old he gets... and a nappy just makes him that much more pliable. The longer we can keep them as babies the better as far as I’m concerned.”

Rubbing her ever so slightly swollen belly she smiles brightly.

#### *****  ####

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Two Days Later

didldleeee - diddleeee -diddleeee-diddledum


“Hello Jane it’s Maggie.”

“Oh hello love how’s things with you?”

“Fine thanks...”

“Barry and the kids... all okay?”

“Yes, we’re all fine thanks. Can you talk?”

“Well, I’m just about to give Aiden his bath... yes sweetheart I’ll be up in a minute... hold on a second Maggie... yes of course you can but just half the amount of last time I don’t want the entire bathroom filled with bubbles... Yes... I’ll be up soon... Sorry about that Maggie, these days he gets so excited about bath time. Anyway, what can I do for you?”

“Well, Geoffrey’s questioning why he’s suddenly started wetting having not done so far the best part of twelve years.”

“Is Kevin asking the same?”

“No, oddly enough he hasn’t. I mean, I think the explanation I gave – it’s probably down to ‘hormones’ - seemed to placate any argument. To be honest, he’s hardly said much at all since he messed his nappy last Friday. The boy’s still pretty embarrassed... and a little terrified by it all in case it happens again ”

“But didn’t you get him to stay protected throughout the weekend?”

“Yes, and then on Sunday morning he woke up and again he’d filled the back and soaked the front... so doesn’t know what to do for the best. Of course Geoffrey created and called him names... none of which were pleasant as you can imagine. So, the poor lad is petrified. As it is I’ve insisted, for his own sake, and to stop any possible humiliation, he wears his nappy all the time.”

“That’s good... making sure he knows it’s his nappy.”

His nappy?”

“Yes, he needs to know he’s like a knight in shining armour - something he can rely on to protect and comfort him... to prevent any further embarrassment by keeping any such accidents well contained.”

“I pointed out that being as anxious about everything makes it more likely he’ll mess again... so it’s much better to ‘be prepared’. And, as it’s worked well so far - a nappy and robust rubber pants - it was easy to get him to see it as a solution. I have to say, I’m not sure how many more laxatives I’ll be able to get into him before he realises what’s going on.”

“But you have so, well done. Now, are they both still waking up soaked?”

“Yes, but Geoffrey doesn’t like the way things are and has become very suspicious that something’s wrong but can’t put his finger on it. He hates the thickness of the fabric nappies and the bother of bed time... but at least for the moment with his dad laying down the law has meant he’s not defied us... yet.”

“Are they both being changed into and out of their nappies at the same time?”

“Yes, and when Geoffrey objected it was his father who told him to “just get on with it and stop bleating”. Much to my amazement... he did and hasn’t complained though I can tell there’s tons of unwillingness there.”

“Well, just a moment... I’ll be up soon sweetheart do you want to try and take your nappy off yourself? Well... yes that will be fine... you can get in but wait for me to bathe... yes you can play with your toys there’s a new boat... yes, I’ll be with you soon I’m talking to Mrs Parsons... Sorry again Maggie... where was I?”

“I was saying Geoffrey is getting suspicious...”

“Oh yes. Look, you need to get him to realise that although it’s a problem for him... you’re all doing your best whilst that problem is there. You wish, as much as he does, that you didn’t have sons their age in nappies but, whilst that’s the case... you all just have to deal with it as best you can.”

“Yes Jane but I’ve said all that... but even Barry’s questioning why it’s happening.”

“Surely whilst the boys are still waking up wet he doesn’t intend on changing things does he?”

“No, he thinks I’m doing a sterling job and he hasn’t complained... mind you... I’ve made sure it’s just the boy’s room that has piles of nappies, plastic pants and stuff... and they’re not clogging up the rest of the house.”

“Does he help with the changes?”

“Not really, he’s on his way out to work just as the boys are coming down for breakfast before school.”

“Are they wearing just their wet nappies?”

“Well, under their plastic pants.”

“So he sees that they’re both still in need of protection at night?”

“Yes but he doesn’t understand why it’s happening and I’m not sure he believes me when I say loads of boys their age go through similar problems. I always emphasise that; according to psychologists - it will pass as quickly as it came.”

“Very good so, if he hasn’t checked this for himself it means at least he’s leaving you to sort things out.”

“I suppose so.”

“Well that’s good but you say Geoffrey’s a problem?”

“Yes he’s...”

“Sorry Maggie hold on a sec.... okay sweetie come here, I’ll help you with that pin... there you go... now Aiden be a good boy for mummy and take this wet nappy, put it in the bin in the bathroom and then get in the tub... I’ll be up soon okay?

The sound of a bare bottom getting a gentle tap and a childish squeal.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry Maggie, Jim’s working late tonight so it’s just me and Aiden and he loves bath night, which I have to admit to quite enjoying myself. Getting my ten year-old all bright and clean before wrapping him in his thick bed time nappy, which he loves, and pulling on, what have become his favourite plastic pants... the ones you got him for the camping trip. So thanks again for them.”

“My pleasure.”

“They certainly seem to give Aiden pleasure... he loves them... he calls them his ‘nighty-night’ pants because he likes to sleep in them.”

“That’s nice.”

“Look Maggie, can I call you back once I’ve got him bathed and ready for bed... say in twenty minutes?”

“Of course, but can you be thinking of a way to get Geoffrey to accept his night time nappy please”



Thirty minutes later

ring ring – ring ring

“Hi Maggie it’s Jane.”

“Got the little sweetie all spruced up and ready for bed?”

“Clean as a button... he’s now lying out in front of the TV watching some Pixar movie... Hmm, his glossy padded little bottom all cosy and protected... I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of that infantile view.”

“Sounds a wonderful scene.”

“It’s really quite amazing how quickly he took to wearing a nappy... and not just at night. I don’t even have to ‘help’ these days as he’s wet almost every morning anyway.”

“How the hell did you manage that?”

“Not sure but I think it’s because he likes to wear his padding and Jim and I have been very positive and encouraging in him wearing it... so... perhaps he’s giving us what he thinks we want. Silly but... who knows what goes through a ten years-old head?”

“Who or what indeed? I wish I had that with my two. Kevin has accepted a nappy at night and seems grateful in the morning when he wakes up soaked but Geoffrey is still a bit resentful... even though I took your advice to get them ready together at night and for them to come down to breakfast before changing them.”

“Well that’s good. Whilst they still need a nappy, and they are obeying the rules you and Barry have set, you should be alright. Have you noticed any change in their behaviour towards each other?”

“Yes, we’ve both noticed there are fewer rows now and I’ve told them both that I want them ready for bed, that means in their protection, an hour before bed time... and they’re both complying.”

“Good, good.”

“But Geoffrey...”

“Ah yes, I’ve been giving that a bit of thought.”

“And what have you thought?”

“Kevin wet the bed before Geoffrey didn’t he?”


“Well, oh just a moment Maggie... yes love I’ll get you a bottle in a few minutes sweetie... yes... and then we can cuddle... yes love I’ll be with you soon... Sorry Maggie, he wants his bottle but that can wait. Look I’ve been thinking. Why not try a bit of ‘pop’ psychology on him.”

“What’s that?”

“Well, how about you put the reason for his wetting back in his court.”

“What do you mean?”

“How about having a heart to heart with him... just you two together and let him talk about his worries. Whilst he offers his take on things you counter with an alternative option.”

“How the hell do I do that?”

“Perhaps you can point out that he didn’t have night time accidents until Kevin wet the bed - and it’s important you get him to agree with this statement. Then ask him how he felt about Kevin’s situation; all the time you should be aiming to get him to admit that maybe he’s a little jealous of the attention his brother got because of it. He will probably deny it but you must keep pushing the point that he never wet the bed until Kevin did so perhaps, just perhaps, subconsciously he wants the same attention.”

“Oh that’s clever but there’s no guarantee he’ll go for it.”

“No of course not but the idea is to put doubt there. I mean, he can’t control his subconscious can he... so maybe he does want to wake with a wet nappy like his brother?”

“God you are devious.”

Yes milk... in a minute sweetie... Just make him have doubts but insist that you know it will pass as these teenage problems have a tendency to do. However, let him know that you and his dad are there to support them both and he shouldn’t be ashamed or worry about it. It’s just one of those things some boys go through as they grow up.”

“Well it’s worth a try.”

“Let me know how you get on... I’ll have to get my little one his bot-bot before his cuddle on the couch and ‘nighty-nights’.”

“You’ve got Aiden well trained.”

“Yes, well, he looks so damn cute. His blue t-shirt, thick nappy pinned tightly and those lovely large plastic pants just make me want to gobble him up. I’ve never been so happy and with another on the way...”

“Okay, I’ll let you go...”

“Oh hold on a minute... somebody’s here to say nighty-night... Hello... Mrs Parsons... can Kevin come over and play tomorrow please?”

“Hello Aiden, I’m sure that won’t be a problem sweetheart but I’ll have to ask and see what he’s doing... I’ll get him to give you a call tomorrow... is that alright?”

Yes, well, thank you and night-night...

“Good night Aiden.”

Let mummy say her good-byes love and then I’ll get you your milk... Well... speak later Maggie, hope it all goes well and keep in touch.”

“Yes, thanks for the advice Jane... not sure I could have done this without your help.”

“No problem but here’s something else... let Barry know your thoughts about Geoffrey’s subconscious possibly driving his wetting. Even if he doesn’t believe it either, it puts doubt and a potential cause in his mind – that could also prove useful if Kevin starts acting up.”

“Yes, thanks, will do. Speak later. Bye”

“Okay little man... let’s get you some nice warm milk then you and I can have that cuddle you’ve been promising me all day.”



++++++  ######  ++++++

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Maybe this is a little weird but Barry might get more traction with Geoffrey if he were diapered himself for bedwetting; besides he'd probably get more attention from his wife.

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Thursday Afternoon


“Good afternoon love, come on in, sorry the place is a mess.  Since he got home from school Aiden and I have just been playing... come here sweetheart and say Hello to Mrs Parsons.”

Hello Mrs Parsons.”

“And a huge Hello to you Aiden... you look and sound very scary.”

“Yes me and mummy have just been playing Star Wars. I’m Darth Vader... It’s been great fun.”

“You’re telling me. He got so excited he’s just soaked his nappy and he’s only just been changed... haven’t you Darth... the evilest and wettest villain in the galaxy?”


“Come here sweetie let’s check. Yes you’re OK for a while... more soak room in there for my scary R2-Pee2 isn’t there?

“Mummy... I’m not a robot.”

more giggles

“Go and play out in the garden sweetie whilst Mrs Parsons and I have a little chat...  and watch where you’re going with that helmet on OK?”

zroom zroom – The padded Dark Lord with lightsaber exits

“Well that was all...”

“Bless him, Jim bought him the helmet a couple of days ago and I don’t think he’s had it off his head except for school, meals and bed. He loves what the voice-box does when he speaks”

“He always seems to be enjoying himself. He’s one hell of a happy little chappie... and I think the black plastic pants make him look like the galaxy’s greatest padded baddie.”


“Yes, I’ve found this great site online that has a range of colourful nappies, disposables and vinyl pants... so I thought, as he’s into dressing up... I’d invest in a few items. They’ve gone down a storm with him.”

“I thought you weren’t a big fan of disposables?”

“Well, only because I thought they were wasteful and not vey eco-friendly but I used them for on our camping trip and... well I think they look fantastic... although I still have terry nappies for him to sleep in.”

“Well they do suit him.”

“To be honest there’s such a brilliant range of colours and designs... and they’re so thick and absorbent... and as you say he looks so damn sweet in them... I let him wear them on special occasions. As we’re going out to the park later... I thought a disposable might be better than his fabric nappy.”

“Well I have to agree, I think the crinkling as he walks complements the Phantom Menace. So, were you playing Princess Leia or Chewbacca?”

“Cheeky thing... Anyway, what brings you around... not for a cup of sugar I’m sure?”

“It’s Barry and Geoffrey.”

“Have they formed a pact or something?”

“No, well, I don’t know. As you suggested I planted the seeds of doubt in Geoffrey’s head about wanting to wet because Kevin did... subconsciously... and for a few nights that seemed to work. However, this morning I heard him and Barry chatting and his dad has agreed that if he goes a week without wetting, he can return to things as they were.”

“Do you know what’s brought this on?”

“Yes, I think it’s because we’re driving down to Barry’s grand-parents this weekend and staying overnight. Neither wants to have to wear nappies whilst down there.”

“Oh I see. What are you thinking?”

“Well, it’s almost a six hour drive there... if we’re lucky with traffic... they live in one of the most inaccessible but incredibly beautiful places in Cornwall... we spent our honeymoon just walking along the beach... very, very picturesque.”

“Personally, on such a long journey I’d keep them padded but if Barry is having doubts perhaps you should let them have their way. If they stay dry, it might only be temporary, if they wet all more power to you.”

“Suppose so.”

“Where’s the problem... you’ll just have to be a bit more crafty.”

“Yes, but with Geoffrey hardly drinking anything at night now and he eats very little, and has done for the past two days, it means he hasn’t wet at all.”

“So do you think he’s sussed what the ‘problem’ is?”

“I don’t think so because if he did I’m sure he’d be more aggressive towards me. The thing is, when I’ve changed them both I see Geoffrey’s getting quite the rash.”

“A nappy rash?”

“Yes, it’s all very red but I can’t tell just how bad because of his pubic hair.”

“Oh, you haven’t removed that... no wonder he has a rash. You need to get rid of all that hair so you can see what’s going on.”

“How do I do that, he’ll think I’m taking away his very manliness.”

“That’s the idea. All that hair is a breeding ground for germs and stuff. Get him smooth but don’t tell him until afterwards why you’ve done it.”

“Any suggestions?”

“You must have some Nair in the house...?”

“Yes I like to keep things... trim.”

“Well, next time your changing them rub in some Nair, tell them it’s some preventative cream and then leave it for a few minutes. When you return just wipe it away and pin on their nappies as quickly as you can.”

“That might cause trouble and Geoffrey has a particularly thick bush down there...  it isn’t easy cleaning him up.”

“Well there you are then... once it’s done it’s done... you can always insist that it’s for health reasons and that rash proved your actions were needed to prevent the infection getting any worse.”

“Did you do that with Aiden?”

“Didn’t have to bless him... in many ways he’s quite immature and still like a baby down there.”

“Well that makes things easier... I’ll see how it goes with mine.”

“Meanwhile... is Kevin still wearing his nappy all the time?”

“Mostly, it’s quite amazing because he doesn’t argue or create when I put it on him and although I don’t make him wear one all the time, only at night, he seems happy when I do. I think he likes wearing it.”

“Well I have read that some boys absolutely adore having their privates cupped and held in nappies.”


“Apparently so...  can’t say I’m surprised... Aiden always seems more at ease when running about in just a tight-fitting nappy. Would you like some tea, coffee... anything?”

“No, no thanks, I only popped in for a quick chat... and I see Aiden’s keen on getting to the park so... thanks for the advice... again... and I’ll see what happens.”

“Well, you’ve got to face the possibility that Geoffrey might win on this and get the support of his dad. So, here’s another suggestion. If it looks like that’s going to happen don’t fight it, let it happen and concentrate on Kevin.”

“Yes, I was wondering about that myself.”


“If you don’t get behind you eldest ‘recovering’ and being happy about it you might find suspicion falling on what’s happening to Kevin. So, if you want to keep him tied to the apron strings for as long as possible... you know what to do.”

“Yes, ok, thanks love. I’ll be off now...

“Hold on. AIDEN, AIDEN... come and say bye to Mrs Parsons.”

Zroom zroom    Bye Mrs Parsons.”

“Bye Darth... mmm... your armour feels nice and squishy... hope you have a nice day in the park.”

Zroom zroom

“See you later... anything else?”

“Yes... you don’t happen to have a cup of sugar I can borrow do you?”

“Cheeky... Bye”


Later that evening the wife and husband chat

“Hi honey, I’m home.”

“Yes, very amusing and very, very old.”

kiss kiss

“How was your day?”

“Very eventful as it turns out. Sit down I’ve got some news that we need to discuss.”

“That sounds serious... Aiden’s doing school work in his room... does he need to be here?”

“Not yet, but it has a lot to do with him.”

“Okay, well you’re not sweating... maybe a little anxious so I guess, hopefully, you’ve not been sacked.”

“Ermmm... quite the reverse.”

“Oh Jim, promotion?”

“Let me tell you what’s happened and what’s been said and then you can judge for yourself.”

“Before we went camping you know I was a little stressed with all the work I seemed to be constantly bringing home?”


“Well, I’d been struggling with reports, accounts and god knows... everything about our Western office which was failing for some reason.”

“You were pretty pre-occupied.”

“Yes, too much so but, when Aiden was returned to nappies, and we’d had that glorious two weeks away, what you did with our son got me thinking.”

A guilty blush

“We spent that time going back to basics, having fun, reliving a time when I was more involved with you both and it sort of released me from the blinkered way I’d been looking at the problem for work.”


“I think we can both agree that Aiden wearing a nappy at ten years old is not satisfactory.”


“Look, let me finish and I’m not having a go... if anything I’m thanking you both. That break was what I needed and you two were the inspiration. You glowed and looked as sexy as hell even when changing our wet little boy. As it turned out, judging by just how comfortable he is now, it was something he either wanted or needed because... I’ve never seen him so happy.”


“Him being returned to wearing a nappy, you looking stunning and me having time to appreciate you both got me thinking of my problem with the Western office. Sorry. However, when I returned to work I was able to pinpoint just where the organization had got it wrong - it was down to some dramatic changes in practices almost eighteen months ago. Are you still following?”

“Yes, I’m just a little...”

“What was needed was simple... a return to how things were and all I had to do was figure out a way of doing that without making things worse... and I did... thanks to Aiden and his lovely, comforting padding.”

“I won’t go into the detail, suffice to say, Mr Pendleton, the CEO, has spent the last couple of days discussing and reviewing my suggestions... AND... he wants me to take over our Western office and put all my recommendations into place.”

“Well that’s brilliant sweetheart, congratulations. Does this mean a huge promotion?”

“Indeed it does... and I’ll head my own division of the company...”

“Where is the Western office... Liverpool?... no... London?”

“No honey...


“Aiden... how’s the sweetest galaxy dominating villain doing this fine evening.”

“Oh daddy put me down... you tickle...”

“Well, when the tickle monster gets home what else can be done except attack his favourite baddie... the ferocious giggling Varth Dader... I mean Darth Vader... or do I?

giggling and laughter

“Aiden, your father’s got some news.”

“Oh, it will wait until we’ve had our meal... we need to discuss it ourselves first...

“Go wash your hand love and time to give Mr Vader a rest...  I’ll set the table.”

(Whispered) “They want me... us... to move to California.”


“California... Los Angeles to be exact... ummm... what do you think?”

“Just give me a minute, this is BIG news and errrr, I’m not sure... ummm... well done love I’m so pleased but, urrm, we need to think about this.”

“Of course love (kiss) but this is a huge opportunity and a house is thrown in with the deal.”

“California has a laid back image but in fact they are ultra-competitive and that has sown the seeds of disaster in that particular part of the company.  I would instigate, co-ordinate and then oversee a sort of ‘Back-to-Basics’ regime, which we’re all agreed will now work over there.”


“Well, the American management they installed handled the changes badly and alienated the workforce. The targets set were unreasonable and divisive. My solution, and without making anyone look like they didn’t know what they were doing, was to return to an earlier system - one that with just a little tweaking should get things back to how they were.”

“I never knew you were so involved in the company... it looks like I also took my eye off the ball when it came to just how hard you work.”

“No love, don’t. What you’ve done with Aiden has been phenomenal, and I’ve been happy to be part of it because I could see what it meant to you... and in so doing... saw the benefits to Aiden and to a large extent... me. Who knew that a ten year-old’s padded bottom and plastic pants would be the inspiration to solving a problem in productiveness?”

“This is unbelievable news... but what about... ”

“Everyone’s on board with the ideas, they also think I can make it work... I’ll be in total charge out there.”


“I don’t want to put a downer on this sweetheart but, if it’s only a little bit of ‘tweaking’, why do they need you over there?”

“Okay, that was me being modest. I have come up with a comprehensive plan, part of which is retrogressive in execution but is very progressive in where I think it will lead. I looked at where they might be problems and where I thought the workforce might not be entirely on-board. However, the CEO liked my drive and ambition for the project and decided that it was best for me to make it happen... so...”

“Perhaps we should go camping more?”

“Yes love, but just think of taking those camping trips in the Grand Canyon or Yosemite National Park?”

“Mmmm... This is a great opportunity and now I think about it... The sunnier climes of California might just get the nod over a wet afternoon here in Manchester.”

“It might be a thrilling experience for us all... and they’re picking up all relocation expenses.”

“When do they need an answer?”

“Pretty soon, they’re excited about my proposals and want to instigate them a.s.a.p.”

“Do we have days, weeks...?”

“I would say days... and the fewer the better because, once we say YES or NO, they’re going to put the full force of the company behind the changes.”

“Well then, tell them YES... I don’t think anything should impede the brilliant career of my husband.”


“Mummy, I’m wet.”

“OK sweetheart, daddy will see to you whilst I get on with the meal... and then we’ve got some news for you.”

#####  ~~~~~~~~  #####

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6       6am Saturday Morning

“If we set off now we can just about avoid the rush out of the city. I’ve set the SatNav for any accidents or roadworks... so hopefully...”

“Kids, c’mon dad’s ready... we need to get going to get there in reasonable time.”

“It’s a long way to go just for a few hours...”

“Stop complaining Geoffrey and get in the car. Kevin, hurry up... and have you both been to the toilet? You know your dad won’t want to be stopping every few miles.”

“Yes, yes, we know.”

“OK then, everyone ready? Let’s go.”

Three hours later

“Damn... we’re going to have to come off the motorway because it says there’s been an accident and the tailback is already over five miles.”

“Dad, can we stop I’m dying for a piss.”

“Language Kevin... I don’t want you speaking like that when we get to your grandparent’s house... they’ll think I’ve brought up a couple of yobs.”

“Yer, alright, sorry mum but can we stop at the next service station... please?”

“I could do with a pi... wee myself.”

“Yes, well okay but, with this diversion I’m not sure where we can find one. Is it urgent?”

“Sort of.”

“I knew I should have had you travel in nappies, it would have made sense and the journey less of a trial.”

“Mum, I’m not arriving and grandma and grandpa’s house wearing a nappy that’s for sure.”

“Well, you also wouldn’t be sitting there fidgeting in your seats desperate for a toilet now would you?”


“From the looks of both of you... Barry, I think you’d better find a place soon. Doesn’t this SatNav tell you where services are?”

“Press that button. There, yes a petrol station in five miles.... can you boys hold on for then... about ten or so minutes?”

“Yes dad.”

“How about you Geoffrey, can you?”

“I’ll just have to.”

“Oh Christ look at that sign.”

“Village Carnival”

“Maggie, see if there’s an alternative way... I’m worried that we’ll meet another tailback as soon as we reach the next ... see... the traffic is already slowing down.”

“Take the next right.”

“Are you sure Maggie, that doesn’t seem a main road.”

“It’s not but it should take us around the village and bring us on to a minor road that leads to...”

“Good thinking.”

“Dad, can we just stop at the side of the road I’m bursting.”

“Yes, but this road is too narrow just to stop anywhere I’ll have to find a place to pull in.”

“Please hurry dad.”

“Kevin, I’m looking...”

“There’s a gate up ahead pull in there.”

Two minutes later

“What a relief.”


“What is it Kevin?”

“I was too late.”

“Oh Jesus, look at your pants... they’re drenched.”

“Sorry mum I, I...”

“I think a nappy would have been a better proposition than that... don’t you think?”

Shrugs unhappily

“Geoffrey, did you manage everything...”

“No problem. Oh Kev, back to being the baby of the family eh?”


“Or should that be - back to being the grumpy baby of the family.”

“Yes shut up and stop picking on your brother. Okay sweetie, we’ve only brought one change for tonight’s party and I’d rather not let you wear them for the moment. So here, slip into these dry boxer shorts and they’ll have to do for the time being.”


“Look love there’s no alternative... and I want you to sit on this towel... just in case.”

“You can just pull it up between your legs, a couple of pins and hey presto...”


“Stop whining Kevin and do as your mother says I don’t want you dripping all over the back seat and you Geoffrey, stop tormenting him. Now, are we all settled? Can we get moving? We’ve still got quite a way to go and we’re running late.”

“Yes dad.”

unhappy mumbles

“Look, there’s a Tesco’s let me get a few bits and bobs before we get to your mum and dad’s place.”

“It’s only a couple more miles can’t we do it later.”

“Look, just drop me off and you and the boys can sit and wait, I’ll only be a couple of minutes... I don’t want to arrive empty handed.”

“We’ve got them a present already.”

“Yes I know but I’ve thought of something else so...”

“OK, do either of you two want to go shopping with your mum?”


“That sounds like you’re on your own.”

Fifteen minutes later

“A bit busier than I thought it would be but I think I’ve got what’s needed.”

“That looks an awfully big bag.”

“Just open the boot and let me shove it in there for the time being.”

“Right, last few miles and we should be there... I hope we’re not the last to arrive.”

Ten minutes later

“Hi grandma, Hi grandpa...”

“Hello boys... my how you’ve grown.”

“OK boys you’re in the back bedroom sharing with Denis and Greg. They’ve already claimed the beds so you’ll have to put your sleeping bags on the inflatable mattresses.... that alright?”

“Sure grandma... (whispered) bloody Denis and Greg... wish we’d got here earlier. They’re younger than us we should have the beds.”

“Let it go Geoff... first come etc...”

“Yes but they’re only kids we should have the beds.”

“It’s not the first time we’ve had to sleep in our sleeping bags... we can pretends we’re camping.”

“Trust you Kev to see a plus side... I’m just saying...”

Meanwhile downstairs mum and dad are in conversation

“What’s in the big Tesco bag?”

“Well, I bought a couple of bottles of champagne and some drinks for the kids... but mainly I bought a bag of disposables...”

“Oh Maggie why?”

“What, after today you don’t think they need them?”

“No, it’s been very fraught and a long drive... accidents happen.”

“I don’t want to see them wetting the bed...”

“Sleeping bags.”

“OK, sleeping bags in front of the other kids... it’ll be just too damned embarrassing for them.”

“And don’t you think wearing disposables also sends out the wrong message to their cousins? I mean, for one I don’t think we’d get them to wear one and two, I don’t think it would come to that... they both seem determined to stay dry.”

“Well ok, but, if they wet again...”

“Geoffrey didn’t wet and Kevin just soaked his pants at the last moment... I’m sure they’ll be fine.”

“In the meantime, I’ll just pop Kevin’s wet pants in the washer so he has something to wear tomorrow other than just a pair of boxer shorts.”

“Yes, you saw how embarrassed he looked meeting his granny and grandpa dressed like that but think how much worse it would have been if you’d made him wear a nappy.”

“Other guests have started arriving and the garden’s filled up, I suppose we’d better join in.

6am the following morning

Whisper “Geoff, Geoff....”


“I think I’ve had an accident.”

“You think?”

“Erm, no... I... erm... err... it can wait.”

“Go back to sleep and don’t wake the others up.”


“Hey Greg did you hear Kevin telling Geoff that he’d had an accident in his sleeping bag?

“It doesn’t surprise me... I heard one of them pissed themselves coming here... so they’re just a couple of big babies.”

“But they’re older than us.”

“Makes no difference... I always thought Kev was a bit of a dweeb... and Geoff... he’s a bit of a bully...”

“Has he been nasty to you?”

“Not this time but in the past he’s been a jerk.”

“A jerk and a dweeb - a couple of pant-wetters.” (Ha-ha)


“Erm, er, umm, nothing.”

“Yes you did you little scummy rats...”

“Well you’re a bed-wetter so there.”

“Don’t talk stupid...”

“Here, feel this... your sleeping bag... soaked... so who’s not a bed-wetter now?”

“Fuck off.”

“Hey, that’s swearing... I’m gonna tell mummy.”

“Yes run to mummy... who’s the little baby now?”


Several hours later

“Look lads it’s a long trip home don’t you think you should wear a disposable under your jeans?”

“Not on your life. I wouldn’t be found dead in one.”

“Kevin, how about you?”

“No way, I’ve already been embarrassed once today so... no.”

“Don’t bother the boys Maggie, let’s just get off. Everything’s packed and...”

“OK boy’s time to go... say bye to everyone.”

“Bye grandma, bye grandpa... bye... bye...”

Two hours later

“Mum, is there anything to drink?”

“Yes, your gran gave us a few bottles and sandwiches to take.... now I’ve got Ribena, Apple Juice and... water. And it looks like Coronation Chicken sandwiches... no there’s also ham... and cheese?”

“Apple juice for me please.”

“That means Ribena for you Kevin... is that OK or would you rather have water... and do you want it now?”


“Yer what?”

“Yes, Ribena pleeeaassse.”

“That’s better young man. Does our illustrious driver fancy a water?”

“Yes, water pleeeaassse.”

“Ahhh very funny.”

Two hours later looking in the rear-view mirror

“Look at the two of them sparked right out in the back there.”

“I’m not sure anyone got much sleep last night... your mum and dad know how to throw a party.”

“It was a great night I’m glad we made the effort. The boys weren’t too bored were they?

“No, err, you just keep your eyes on the road... but did you know that Kevin wet his sleeping bag last night?”

“Good God no.”

“Yes and their cousins found out and called them both babies so you can imagine...”

“But surely Denis is only just out of nappies himself and Greg’s what, eight?”

“Denis is eight, Greg’s ten...”

“Oh bloody hell no wonder they’ve been in a mood all day.”

An hour later

“What’s that smell, wind your window up.”

It is up... bloody hell somebody has been spreading muck on the fields.”

“But there aren’t any fields around here...”

“Oh no... look at the back seat. Kevin’s wet and so is... wake up you two...”

“What, wwwhhatt is...”

“You’re soaked. You both are. What the hell... and Geoffrey... have you shi.... messed your pants?”

“Oh for Christ’s sake... “

“No, no, no... I’ll never get the piss and shit out of the fabric...”

“Pull over Barry?”

“We’ve only got about fifteen minutes till we’re home... it will have to wait.”

“Push this towel under yourself Geoffrey... and here’s one for you Kev... oh that’s a mess.”

“What the HELL guys.”


“Right you two... I suggested you might need a disposable for the long journey back but you both said ‘NO’... correct?”

“Mum I need to get out of these pants they stink.”

“Yes I know... this isn’t the time for recriminations so you go to the bathroom first. Dump you stuff, after you’ve rinsed as much of the crap out, take a shower and then wait for me.”


“Don’t you dare start - your father’s out scrubbing away at the seat fabric desperately trying to... I don’t know what but if he can’t get the stain out...?”


“Yes Kevin I know but you’ll have to wait for your brother to finish... you’re not as bad... but don’t sit anywhere. In fact, go to your room and take all your clothes off and I’ll be up in a minute.”

“Mum it was an accident.”

“I sincerely hope so... get yourself cleaned up but wait.”

“Wait for what?”

“Go on. You in the bathroom Geoffrey and you... on second thoughts... to the kitchen... I think I’ll put your stuff straight in the washer. Go.”

Ten minutes later

“Those stains are going to take ages to get rid of... I’ll phone around tomorrow and see if I there’s anyone who can get it clean.”

“Hopefully, it’ll just be a clean and sanitize job. If not, I’m sure there’ll be some industrial fluid or something that will work. ”

“You warned me about them. You said they should wear nappies and I foolishly ignored what...”

“Well only because they’ve both been having problems for the past few days. Look, I know you’re pretty annoyed right now but I don’t think that they’re ready to spend a night without wearing some protection - especially as Kevin wet his sleeping bag last night.”

“Mmmm, I forgot about that.”

“I know you’re not keen on the boys wearing...”

“Look love, I’ve been wrong about this on more than one occasion. If you think they need to have a layer of protection I’m certainly not going to argue with you.

“Well I want them in disposables tonight as a safeguard but they’re both refusing to wear them.”

“Are they indeed?”

“So, if you could have a word that would be great.”


“So, you two think that wetting and messing yourselves and leaving a trail of destruction in the car means you’re grown up enough to make decisions of your own... well I’m not.”

“But mum wants us to wear a nappy again and it was accidental.”

“Look, I’m in no mood to argue so let me put it this way... either get that nappy and plastic pants on now or I’ll spank both your hides... and you’ll need a thick cushion to help take away the sting... your choice.”

“But dad...”

“I’ll be back in five minutes to check. If either of you aren’t wearing them you’ll both be in for it. Don’t mess with me tonight.”

“But dad please... don’t...”

“Kevin, come here. Do you want me to put it on for you?”

“Erm, not really... I can....”

“Pass me the oil and the powder. It’s like you’re two years old again and I’m having to change a couple of tots. Geoff, if you aren’t wearing the disposable mum gave you by the time Ive finished your brother than you’ll be over my knee...”

“But daaaddd.”

“You know I’m not joking and I’m angry so... are you sure you want to argue Geoffrey? Both of you... I don’t want to hear any more complaints.”

Four minutes later

“That’s better... and the plastic pants Geoffrey...”

“Aaaarrggghhhh this is stupid. I’m too old for this... I’m not a fucking baby mum...this is embarrassing”

“Language young man... have you or have you not just crapped your pants like a baby does?”

(mumbles and blushes)

“Yes, well, think on. Perhaps an early night for everyone isn’t a bad idea.”

“Mum, this isn’t fair.”

“Do you think that right now is a good time to annoy your father when he spent twenty minutes scrubbing down the back seat?”

“No, but...”

“Look love, tomorrow’s another day and after we’ve all slept on it I’m sure our judgement will become much clearer. Just for tonight sleep on it... I know it’s not very satisfactory but right now, this is something we think you both need... insurance if you like... so don’t fight us on it.”

This isn’t fair mum (mumble)”

“Good night Kevin... oh I think he’s already asleep. Geoffrey, get some sleep but remember... you’ve both just messed your pants and jeans whilst sleeping... I think a nappy is the least you could expect.”

“But it was an accident.”

Was it now?”

Mum turns off the light and exits leaving the accusation unanswered


####  ~~~~  ####  ~~~~  ####

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