The Day Has Arrived

[dlsafrica]

God Jul. Feliz Natal. Merry Christmas.

I struggle to be enthusiastic. I have a tree for the first time in 17 years (my sister thought I had one every year), and it sits bare, except for two bells and a gift for my cat under it. Maybe I'll do the Days Of Our Lives thing and hang the names of people that I miss.

It seems that my tendency to give people the benfit of whatever doubt there might be has proven to be fruitless. I left a message on my mom's phone suggesting that I could go over on Christmas Eve at least. No reply phonecall.

But contrary to last year, if people ask me today if I'm okay I'll tell them. I suppose I have been invited for the day tomorrow, to people from my church. But I almost don't know if it's out of pity.

(my sister and best friend live overseas) -- I miss them so much; the only people who truly understand me

[rusty pins]

This time of year can be hard on a lot of people.  Those people who have relatives far away that they miss, people who spend it alone, it can be hard.  On the other hand, even though it's hard to overcome feelings of being down, left out and alone, Christmas is what you make of it.  Many years ago when a manager where I worked was giving me a very rough time for his own personal reasons, a friend of mine said, "Does your boss make you angry?"  My answer was, "He's just the carrier".  The right answer is, "You make yourself angry by how you address the situation".   That is correct for many situations, including being alone on Holidays.  We can choose the easy way and wallow in self pity, or we can make ourselves as happy as possible.  Things I can think of right off the top of my head is spending time at a senior center or nursing home.  Senior centers often have holiday activities for those who live alone, and a senior center doesn't have to be a nursing home.  Lots of senior centers are places for older folks to get together now and then to play cards, talk, interact with each other.  At Christmas time they usually have a tree, music playing, cookies and food, etc.  Contact a senior center ahead of time and ask if they could use some help Christmas day.  Make a batch of cookies to take over and join in as much as you can.  Remember, many senior's don't have family either and would otherwise spend Christmas alone as well.  Seniors are a wealth of historical information on the wars, the great depression, life in general.  You will help bring some cheer to both them and yourself.  It's not a substitute for spending time with family, but a replacement.  Who knows, you might have a better time than had you spent it with family and make new friends!  It's too late for this year, but keep it in mind for next year should the situation be similar.

By the way, the manager who gave me such a bad time was fired a month after I left that job because the company lost 2 big accounts of mine for the reason I was no longer with the company and no one else there could do those accounts properly without messing things up.  I'm a firm believer in Karma and What Goes Around Comes Around.  Treat people as you would like to be treated and you will be fine.