Looking For Friends

[newreno_3]

Hi guys, not really sure what to write in here. But I'm simply looking for friends. Doesn't really matter where you are from, or whether you are a DL/AB/LG it doesnt matter I just want to hear from you.

I'm Will, I'm 29 and I'm from the UK, I've recently moved to North Wales. I'm more of a DL personally. I've experimented with being an AB but for me its more of a sexual experience, I'm very much into BDSM and like to involve diapers in that. But all in all I just want to hear from people. Just to chat, nothing more. Get in touch if you are interested to know more, PM me or email me at newreno_3@hotmail.com.

[gah!ghost]

I debated for awhile on how or even if to respond. What I want to say might come off as negative towards you or the community and I really don't want anyone to think that. I have nothing but positive feelings about these forums and you seem like a nice chap and I totally get what you're after.

Okay so first thing. I could maybe see some people here getting a little negative about you asking for personal 1 to 1 conversation. I haven't been an active part of any ABDL community for very long so I haven't had the experiences many seem to have had… but from what I gather at least a few people have had negative almost stalker-like engagements with people via PM, email, or chat. I don't have any issue with you asking myself, but I also get why some others might have a negative first impression just because of that. Also just on a general web privacy front, even if you set up a specific email just to post here, I wouldn't post your email online on an open forum like this. At best it's asking for a lot of spam.

Second, in regards to the community itself. Again, I have had pretty much nothing but positive experiences posting here and in general it's a very upbeat place. There's a few times where people who've had a bad day or whatever might get a bit nasty, but in my experience that seems to be more the exception than the rule. I like this forum a lot otherwise I wouldn't post here and read as much as I do.

but…

It's a large community with a fairly transient user pool. There's a lot of people who just post a few times and never post again, either going back to just lurking or just plain leaving. There's also just a plain old large number of people of a pretty diverse age range and large breadth of interests. It makes it hard to get to know any one person, especially given the large number of forums and sub forums. Even on fairly small forums with a small number of people, due to the limited interactions, it can take years to get to know anyone. So it's no easy task to make friends and that sucks. Sometimes it just feels like you're yelling into the void. I'm up for getting to know more about you though. Not sure I want to take it into PMs because well, maybe we both could benefit from other people reading what we have to say about ourselves.

We do share some similarities based on what you posted. I'm 31 and definitely more of a DL and into BDSM as well although I live in the US. For me though neither diapers or BDSM are really a sexual thing. I think I enjoy both things for the same basic reasons, the whole control vs lack of control thing. BDSM is also more of an aesthetic interest for me, I'm very picky about what I like. I was always a big fan of the sort of rural cast iron, leather, and natural rubber look of all the Insex stuff. PD the guy who ran the site was also a trained fine artist and a very competent painter and you can see that carry over into the BDSM shoots he did. There's a very good documentary on his work called "Graphic Sexual Horror". For me the diaper thing is a bit more complex, and it's not something I fully understand the reasons for, but I have come to be very accepting of it, even if I am scared to death anyone I know in real life will find out. That was a run on sentence, but fuck it, moving on…

In terms of other non-kink related interests, I'm an illustrator and designer by trade. I'm also trying to get better at writing because I have a lot of stories I want to tell and am using the ABDL story forum here as a way to get feedback on my writing even though ultimately my interests in writing don't have anything to do with diapers or fetishes in general. I'm a big movie watcher, largely just watching horror films, and also read a lot. I tend to like fantasy, horror, and sci-fi. Regular drama and comedy doesn't hold a lot of interest for me. I like me some escapism in my entertainment. I don't really play video games though, which I think is odd for someone in my age range and least I don't have a single friend who doesn't play video games.

[newreno_3]

Thanks for the reply. I'm glad that you have written such a comprehensive response, much of which I totally understand. I've been on this forum in the past, and on chat. But I feel its hard to make friends on chat, you can share jokes and stories at times, but those people dont usually want to continue chatting afterwards. But usually its people having private or injokey style conversations publicly which you cannot join in with or no one chats at all. So I took the risk of asking people to get in touch, no doubt I'll get some very odd replies (I was one of those people who spoke to the gal who apparently died during the riots). But hey lets see shall we?

As for me, well I wasnt going to put info on me here but I feel I should share somewhat. I work in retail, but am opening a wrestling school soon. I class myself as a failed actor, writer and broadcaster, as I've tried all three and failed miserably, but hey what can you do, its made me who i am today. I am planning on doing more writing and performing at some point. I love all kinds of movies, from indie, to sci-foi to horror, although i do moan that films arent scary anymore!! I am a bit of a mad video game player, but i prefer specific games, i need a heavy story for my games! Um anything else please ask, its late so im struggling!

[gah!ghost]

I'm a failed a lot of things as well. I've been lucky to try out most of my dream jobs and found that they weren't really for me. The sort of work I do now allows me to be both creative in my job and leave plenty of room for me to still be creative in my personal endeavors which is great.

As far as horror not being scary anymore, I think it's more just a matter of volume. There's such a huge variety and breadth of movies being made now that I think you both get a higher number of movies you might really love and a higher difficulty of actually finding them. I say "you might love" because I don't really believe in bad movies. There's movies I like and movies I don't like. There's movies that are technically made well but that doesn't neccesarilly mean I will like them. I'm not a big fan of Avatar for example but there's no doubt that's a well made film. That goes for pretty much everything from books to music as well.

It's a way of looking at things that has long been taken for granted in the fine art world, "art is in the eye of the beholder" and all that, and I think it's equally true of all other creative endeavors.

I get what you mean about sharing as well. It still wigs me out a little to say "too much" about myself for fear someone will recognize me via my interests or the way I type or something. I'm trying to get over that because it's just not good for me to be fearful all the time about something I like. Not sure if that's why you didn't want to share too much about yourself, but it is why I tend to be non specific.

[newreno_3]

Yes I think that goes for a lot of us. Out of all the fetishes Adult Baby is the one i think people understand the least. People often make unfounded connections to children, which can also make it difficult when it comes to telling a partener.

As for horror movies, I'm sure its just me getting older and more fussy than movies getting less scary. I felt the same with horror games but I have my own thoughts to why that is, wrote an article on it but never finished it! Do I believe in bad movies? Um, I'm not sure. I do agree that every movie means something to someone. I had an ex who used to love that Britney Spears movie a while back. But I'd love to discuss what could constitute a 'bad' movie.

[gah!ghost]

I love the hell out of that Mandy Moore presidential daughter movie so I can't really cast stones. Chasing Liberty I think? While I do typically watch a lot of horror the breadth of stuff I like it pretty wide.

[newreno_3]

I can't say anything, I love the Super Mario Bros movie and that is generally considered to be awful. I do have a facination with bad movies, although do agree there isn't really such a thing. I do so love those awful 50s and 60s creature features that were made rather cheaply, also films like Plan 9 From Outer Space is a wonderful watch. As for writing I've never written about my diaper side, not sure i would do it justice.

[gah!ghost]

Oh man I love that movie. How can you not? It's a cyberpunk movie with mutant dinosaurs! When I was in my teens I spent a lot of time renting anything from the local video store that had a cool cover. Saw a lot of wacky low budget sci-fi and horror from the 70s and 80s. One of my favorites is still Split Second. It's a pretty obscure movie, I don't think it ever even made it out on DVD, at least not in the states. That's also how I discovered the Evil Dead movies. Watched a lot of Corman movies too like the Carnosaur series.

[newreno_3]

Ah how can you beat Corman movies? I do so love Troma style low budget flicks too, saw Hobo With A Shotgun last month and loved it! Plus 80's monster movies like Tremors, cant beat them! I would love to open my own cinema, sadly where i live now its just not possible, although there's not a decent cinema for miles around!!

[gah!ghost]

Oh yeah, Troma is great. My favorite is probably Tromeo and Juliette. Tremors as well I really dig. I recently just watched the first and second which I had seen before as well as the third which I had never seen before. They definitely dip off significantly after the first one. Tromeo and Juliette in retrospect I probably really dig because James Gunn (Slither, Super) wrote it. I really dig that guy's stuff.

On the subject of trying to make friends on a forum like this, I have a tendency to be more comfortable with female friends. It's probably because I got so much shit from guys being the weird kinda girly dude all through school. Girls seem way less likely to want to kick my ass, so I like having them as friends better. Girls also tend to not like sports which is a plus, since I have zero interest in sports. Problem is, in this community, I always feel like I'll come off as skeeze if I try to interact too much with any of the girls on here. I know, probably more my hang up that anything else, it's just that I never want to be "that guy".

[newreno_3]

You know i never knew that James Gunn wrote Tromeo and Juliette! I love Super and Slither! I loved Terror Firmer but I must say my favourite was Sgt Kabukiman NYPD, I discovered it at about 3am on Channel 4 when i was about 15. Twas awesome!

As for leaning towards being friends with girls I know what you mean. During school and college I was never particularly popular but never unpopular, I had my group of friends and was happy, plus we were all guys and that was cool. But moving into the 'world of work', especially after moving to Wales I've felt more comfortable in the presence of women. Not sure why, I suppose I've never felt judged by them. With guys, especially since my move, I've found a sense of 'competition' when it comes to everything. Cars, weight lifting, accidents, doesnt matter the next guy has a better one, can lift more or had a worse one. Its hard to chat to girls on here, there are so few that when a shy new ladies says 'hi' she gets bombarded with horny guys trying to get their end away that they often never post again. If you are like me and have perhaps even thought about messaging a girl on here just to say hello, you can guarentee that 50 other guys have thought it through. Tis a shame as I''d like to be able to talk to someone about my diaper side, but just not as comfortable chatting to another guy about it.

[gah!ghost]

I think for me it helps that honest to god I have almost no sexual interest in anyone, then again a lot of people don't believe that and I don't blame them. I have actually had a few girls in my life try to get into my pants by pretending to not care about sex either. I've also had some female friends stop being my friend after I turned them down, which sucks.

[newreno_3]

Dude that does suck. There's nothing worse than losing a friend over sex, its happened to me before and its not worth it really is it? But no interest in anyone at all? That interesting, have you always been that way inclined? and do you mean in general or just in anyone at the moment. Give me a heads up if you don't want to talk about this on here!

[gah!ghost]

I mean sex holds no interest for me and I have very little sex drive and have for my whole life. I didn't even try to masturbate until I was 19. It makes my life a lot less complicated I'll say that much.

[newreno_3]

I can imagine! When it comes to sex drives everyone is different, sorry to hear its caused you problems in the past. I have a fairly high drive i've found, but it more comes down to trying new things, suppose thats why im in diapers! lol

[gah!ghost]

I think it's saved me more problems than it's caused. It's just one of those things people just cannot believe. It's like saying "I don't eat". It's weird, I have no sex drive but all sorts of fetishes really interest me. More because of the diversity of the human experience and the sense of taboo than sex itself. I think another reason I liked Insex so much is that in a lot of pd's videos there's very little actual sexual content, especially in the earlier stuff.

It's a shame he got shut down, the current game in town for that sort of stuff, Kink.com, just doesn't compare. Lacks the edgieness and artistry of pd's work. They've had him on a few times to do guess shoots, but it's still way toned down from what he did with insex.

[newreno_3]

Oh yes I love fetishes! All sorts even ones I'm not into but I love just learning about them. I dont know what Insex or Pd is though. what are they?

[gah!ghost]

insex was one of the first bondage video sites on the web. It also to this day I think is among the most extreme. Just google it and you'll find some interesting stuff. "pd" is the moniker of the guy who started it, designed, and acted as the dom in most of the videos. If you're interested in BDSM I'd check 'em out for sure. The site still exists but it's just an archive you can pay for access to and no longer run by pd. I think it's owned by a German company. The problem pd ran into iirc is that once he got investigated, even though he was never charged, no credit card company would work with him anymore and so he couldn't accept payments. I used to have most of the videos but lost all of them in an HD crash and have since been unable to find them again through piracy means and don't really like giving money to some random company instead of pd.

On a separate subject, I have for a long time mostly just view the forum by looking at the "View New Content" section which by default shows you all the topics you have participated in that have new posts. Only recently have I messed around with any of the settings and started to use it to just show all the threads that have activity since the last time I visited. It's a great way to brows a big complex forum like this. Also made me realize that most of the activity seems to be in the RP section which I have mostly just ignored. Looking through some of the threads though, it seems like a lot of the "role-play" actually ends up being more like exquisite corpse style story writing which is pretty neat. I wouldn't mind trying that out, and it's fun to read some of them.

[newreno_3]

I checked out Insex, yes it reminds me a lot of kink.com, but it does look at bit harder. Would love to check it out, dont know how i missed it! I do like heavy bondage, I'm a switch which i like as I think when I dom it helps me become and better sub and visa-versa. I think experiencing it really helps to understand it. When im being dommed i know what I'd like to happen so I do it when i dom! I enjoy vacbed and inflation and that kinda thing, its nice to watch!

As for the roleplay forum I've not participated in it myself, read it a few times and I've roleplayed with people online, but yes its cool, i may well do one of the days!