A News Article That Explains It Well

[superdiaperbaby]

I am really shocked at how informed the author of this article is. I think people really can learn about us if they want to! SDB

http://www.easttenne...04#.TydK1LEgfZc

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Dear Sex Matters,

I am a male college student here at ETSU with a fetish that is called infantilism. Among other things, it consists of wearing diapers, as well as the desire to be taken care of like a baby. Do you think it's weird for a college student to be wearing diapers for a fetish? How do I find others with this fetish? I mean, I know there's a whole community of us out there. Just wondering.

Thanks,

Diapered College Kid

Dear Diapered College Kid,

A fetish involves having a sexual, erotic response to an item or body part that is not inherently sexual. Some examples of fetishes are different body parts (feet, hair, etc.), clothes (dresses, stockings, etc.), materials (rubber, vinyl, etc.) and acts (submission/domination, voyeurism, exhibitionism).

Really, the list is endless. Sexual desires and turn-ons vary extensively between people. A particular object or behavior might excite one person, might repulse another or might make another person feel nothing either way.

Is it normal to have a diaper fetish? In general, fetishes are rather common and harmless, as long as they don't lead the person with the fetish to cause harm to another. Fetishes are a problem if the persons experiencing them feel distress.

I'm noticing that you mention both infantilism and a diaper fetish. These are two separate fetishes, although often, they are connected. Both infantilism and a diaper fetish center around a core desire that almost always involves diapers.

In a diaper fetish, it is the diaper itself that becomes arousing. In contrast, infantilism focuses on the self. So, the wearing of the diaper becomes an expression of a role. This roleplay may involve acting like and/or being treated as an infant, toddler or small child.

With both diaper fetishism and infantilism, the emotional content of the fantasies are much more important that the actual diaper itself. Sex is not necessarily part of the role play, although on the other hand, sometimes it is.

Those with infantilism tend to consider themselves adult babies (ABs). Those with diaper fetishes tend to consider themselves diaper lovers (DLs). Since many adult babies also enjoy the interests of DLs and visa versa, they are collectively called AB/DLs.

Within the infantilist community, there are many different types of "baby" roles, props, roleplays, rituals and gender plays. Individuals may engage in gentle and nurturing experiences or be attracted to masochistic, coercive or punishing experiences. All of this is fine and good and healthy, as long as — and this is the key point — everything that happens with a partner is consensual.

Infantilism is often misunderstood by the general public. There is some research that indicates that some forms of childhood emotional stress (usually occurring between the ages of 5 and 10) contribute to the development of infantilism and diaper fetishism.

This stress usually takes the form of either an actual or perceived lack of nurturing or a failure of the parent to recognize and/or support the softer elements of a child's personality. It is, however, important to note that this is not always the case. Though commonly confused with pedophilia, infantilism is very different, and infantilists do not seek children as sexual partners. Infantilistic relationships are always adult to adult.

How comfortable are you communicating your own fantasies and fetishes to a possible partner? People engaged in diaper fetish and infantilism are most often male and heterosexual, so however you define your own sexual orientation may present certain opportunities or challenges in finding a willing partner.

There are many Internet communities serving AB/DLs, so this may be a good place to start reaching out to people to find others sharing your interests.

When you do disclose your desires to a partner, how do you see yourself responding to his or her questions and reactions? Many people feel different pressures, have different moods and feel ambivalence about exploring certain sexual possibilities. Remember, a person doesn't need to explain or even understand why they're not into something; they can just say "stop" or "no." Saying "yes", saying "no," or saying "I'm not sure yet, I need to think about it," are all reasonable answers to any partner's request. It is important to acknowledge and support whatever response your partner gives.

As humans, we are sexual beings. With a few particular exceptions, the needs and wants of AB/DLs are common to us all. We all want a relationship, we all want to have a safe place to express our sexuality, we all want acceptance, we all want to belong and we all want to have our unique needs met. Being an AB/DL certainly presents its challenges, as there are many cultural and social biases that make meeting others and accepting oneself more difficult; however, you are not alone. There are certainly thousands of others like yourself.

Take the time to find your communities that provide safety and support for your preferences, practice the healthy relationship skills of good communication and consent, and know that the practice of infantilism can be healthy and healing if it is kept in balance with a person's adult functioning and responsibility.

Questions in the Sex Matters column are answered by Rebecca Alexander, a licensed counselor with Outreach & Advocacy: Sexuality Information for Students (OASIS). Email your questions to oasis@etsu.edu.

[sarah_ab]

well written personally i would be interested in the research he mentions ... a lot of it seems like he took of the dd main page ... cant complain there its a pretty well written main page

[curiositykilledthecat]

not too shabby

[Bettypooh]

Nice- very nice Sad to say uncommon as well, but hey, as this gets around maybe more people will learn and understand about us, and that's a very good thing!

Bettypooh

[DL88]

What a refreshing, positive, well-written, and informative article! Three cheers for Ms. Rebecca Alexander!