Last Post Wins....

[underwhere]

That doesn't change the fact that I am still ten miles ahead of you, and the only reason you don't know it is because you can't see me. (I consider myself very fortunate that a frog's tongue can not reach ten feet....)

In any event, since I am so far ahead, I decide to keep walking while winning.

[Guest *~Andi~*]

Ever heard of the tortoise and the hare?? You think that crap is true....??

You keep walking, Im taking the fast pace move for the win!!!!!!!

~~~~ZOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM~~~~

[underwhere]

Both frogs and a notorious Princess of Wheels have been known to place land mines in the road for those unwary travelers, and speed is no substitute for carefulness, as evidenced by the land mine I just heard explode as Andrea tried to go over it. In any event, I avoid the land mines by being careful about where I step, and as a result, unlike Andrea, I have not exploded. Therefore, I win.

[Eir]

Since I was nearly dead and not all dead, miracle max's chocolate pills brought me back to life. Therefore, I win!

[freswith]

Summoning my sailplane I soar silently past the unsuspecting underwhere and slide to a stop seventy-seven miles ahead of him.

This is a stunning surprise which he cannot sensibly dispute because, I'm sure I shouldn't say it, he LISPS!

[Guest *~Andi~*]

[square_duck]

I had the hic ups but it did help put me a head of everyone else .

*HIC*

{{{{{BOING}}}}

*hic*

{{{{BOING}}}

*HIC*

W*I*N!

[underwhere]

Sir Duck, I do believe you have fallen prey to that old sign I saw on the road, the one which reads, "Stop! A head?" There was no punctuation written on it, of course, but the sign next to it read "Stop ahead!" which means something a bit different. I don't normally stop for a head, but I will stop ahead. Stupid English confusion. Regardless, I win.

[Eir]

Inigo Montoya kills underwhere, therefore I win!

[underwhere]

But I do not have six fingers on my left hand. Why would Inigo Montoya want to kill me?

Now, how many fingers does a square duck have, or a tree frog, or terryfighter?

Anyway, since I am typing here, I am obviously winning.

[Eir]

I glue a fake pinky on underwhear's left hand, and I watch him run.

[underwhere]

....and run I do, right into terryfighter, where I have absolutely no qualms about stabbing her eyes out with my fake pinky finger. (By the way, when will people learn to spell my name correctly?)

I know that violence is never the answer, so as a result, I leave the fake pinky finger there, and amble off, winning.

[Eir]

I want to have a crib night! The irony now is that I need to wait to next check to comfortably get another cheap shower curtain and can of fix a flat to fix my aoh matwess cwib, espesily since I dih nah hab enuf time cus ob work do hab du cwib nites. No faoh dat i hab do wayt.

[underwhere]

Oh dear! With terryfighter blabbering in babytalk, I'll just have to win.

[Eir]

I fed squirrels at Hippie Hollow, therefore I win!

[freswith]

I fed terryfighter TO the squirrels in Hippie Hollow, therefore I win!

[Eir]

Squirrels are vegetarian, therefore I win!

[freswith]

Not Arcturan Tree Squirrels, they're not! Nasty little beasts!

Oh, and I win.

[Eir]

I call the crazy chef from Little Mermaid, watch you run, and I win.

[freswith]

I run straight past the winning post.

[Eir]

I win as I discreetly put a mirror at the finish line, so you thought you had to turn around!

[freswith]

Arcturan Tree Frogs do not have reflections in mirrors, as everybody knows.

Still winning.

[Eir]

I fart in your general direction.

[freswith]

Cap'n "Black Jack" Freswith stands to windward of you, steals your wind and sails past you into the lead.

[underwhere]

Ah, so we are playing black jack, now. In that case, since I know already that freswith has the win, and an ace showing, I buy insurance. Therefore, at least I do not lose.

Subsequent to that, I poke freswith with a thumb tack. As a result, I win.