Dominant Girlfriend

[DLHOOPZ]

Today me and my girlfriend tryed some new things, she found out that she like to be dominate and tie me up with alittle RP involed to . If she is in to this Bondage and and stuff do you think there is chance that she will be into the diaper thing as well?

[Vermino]

best thing you can do is just ask her. alot of girls i've talked to don't know anything about AB/DL and I just bring it up slowly into the conversation. There isn't really an easy way to do it (shrugs).

something like your situation I would ask her if she would be ok with roleplaying house - then explain.

(I usually tell a girl in the start of the relationship when we are asking eachother what we like fantasy wise - I do get to hear some juicy stuff from some girls) just be honest, AB/DL might be taboo but plenty of women think it's cute and are understanding.

[Sophie ♥]

^Well said.

I'd just like to mark... the correlation between bondage and AB/DL stuff isn't remarkably common. There are a lot of AB/DLs that don't like bondage and even more people that like bondage who don't like diapers. So don't think that because she likes being dominant and enjoys bondage that she'll like diapers...

However, it does show an increased awareness in the "outer realm" of sexual fantasies. So that's a plus. And since she likes being dominant and diapers are a way of enhancing that experience... she might like them just for that. Still. Don't assume.

Stick with Vermino's instructions.

-Sophie

[enfant]

If this was her first discovery that she likes kinky sex, I would suggest you concentrate on exploring that for a while.

There are some good books she could start with... off the top of my head, I'd suggest Come Hither and Different Loving by Gloria Brame, The Sexually Dominant Woman: A Workbook for Nervous Beginners by Lady Green, or The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy. Most of those don't go into the subject of infantilism in much detail (though the first two do mention it), but they all address figuring out who you are and what you like, and they talk about how to safely negotiate scenes, set boundaries and limits, etc.

Also, if you live near a big city, see if there are any fetish/BDSM clubs or dungeons that offer classes or social events. Go and learn. As she gets more comfortable with her own likes and dislikes, and more aware of the wide range of possibilities, the fact that you like diapers won't seem particularly weird at all.

[fideliuscharm]

Today me and my girlfriend tryed some new things, she found out that she like to be dominate and tie me up with alittle RP involed to . If she is in to this Bondage and and stuff do you think there is chance that she will be into the diaper thing as well?

Is there a chance? sure. But the reality is, it will likely take her some time to wrap her head around it. Most of my partners over the last 10 years have already been kinky, so it wasnt as much of a stretch. My attitude is to tell partners right from the get-go. Just a fast - hey I'm into this, if you'd like to try it some time I think we could have a lot of fun, if not, that is okay too.

Of my partners who've participated, most have done so strictly because they've enjoyed how much pleasure *I* get from it. So be aware of any subconscious expectations that you may impose upon her. Let her come to enjoy diapers (with you) for her own reasons.

So if you're thinking you're all of the sudden going to find out that she's totally into diapers and wants to wear/have you wear. That's not realistic and you're setting yourself up for disappointment and resentment.

@enfant - Thank you for a well written highly articulate informative response!

[Darkfinn]

Is there a chance? sure. But the reality is, it will likely take her some time to wrap her head around it. Most of my partners over the last 10 years have already been kinky, so it wasnt as much of a stretch. My attitude is to tell partners right from the get-go. Just a fast - hey I'm into this, if you'd like to try it some time I think we could have a lot of fun, if not, that is okay too.

Of my partners who've participated, most have done so strictly because they've enjoyed how much pleasure *I* get from it. So be aware of any subconscious expectations that you may impose upon her. Let her come to enjoy diapers (with you) for her own reasons.

So if you're thinking you're all of the sudden going to find out that she's totally into diapers and wants to wear/have you wear. That's not realistic and you're setting yourself up for disappointment and resentment.

I'm with this guy.

[DLHOOPZ]

For letting her know right off the bat im not so sure about, i think ill do abit from all the advice. Im not going to wait to long, i still want to sorta feal her out alittle like c what else she likes or would like and there is a book store down the road from me i can go to and as for going to a city i live in Manassas Va soo yea well unless theres somthing in D.C which i havent really checked then books and advice from people here is probly the way to go. I appreciate the replies let me know anything else -Hoopz

[dl_ashlee]

At least from the people I know who are into bdsm and diapers have come up in conversation at a party or some such would not be accepting from the comments I have heard and the general tone. Actually personally I think many in the scene can be more close minded. But it doesn't sound like she is into the scene but rather just finding out that she likes some kink play in the bedroom. So I would say there probably isn't much correlation between bdsm and her being open to less popular fetishes.

Still you probably should just tell her as it will come out sooner or later and she will certainly have to be at least somewhat accepting for the relationship to work.

[froggy]

I agree with dl_ashlee. I have found few that are into bdsm that will accept diapers too. The acceptance of diapers that I heard was as a punishment tool for them to use. They really seem to not understand why we might actually like diapers.

There are many parallels to bdsm in the baby world. The difference is why it is done. These include: 1) restraint, 2) gags/pacifiers, 3) special clothing, etc. For the baby they are done for safety and parental ease. In bdsm, they are done for pleasure, control, punishment, etc.

wribbit

[sarah_ab]

Today me and my girlfriend tryed some new things, she found out that she like to be dominate and tie me up with alittle RP involed to . If she is in to this Bondage and and stuff do you think there is chance that she will be into the diaper thing as well?

theres always a chance...

but you are into diapers... does that mean you are going to be into pony play?

you are into diapers, does that mean you want someone to pee in your mouth or poop on your chest? or that you want to do the same?

while some (myself included) see ab as a Dom/sub role play scenario, theres no garuntee at ALL she will want to diaper you as a form of domination...

[ranger]

Maybe you can lead up to it by asking what happens if you have to go to the bathroom while you are tied up?