My Private Life Was Almost Destroyed

[Diaper273]

So I used to have a friend whom was the collest guy ever. Both me and him would do everything together. Seriously, we hung out every single day for about 3 months at one point. Then one day I told him about my diapers. Now, before when people told him secrets, he told everyone else. I thought though that since we were excellent friends. Well about two weeks ago, we decided not to be friends anymore (won't go into details, but let's say he let his parents ground him when he's 21 years old). I couldn't handle is restricted freedom so we weren't friends anymore.

I got a text message (out of all the things, a text message lol) from his sister cussing me out and I guess he told his sister I like to wear diapers. I was angry at first. She told me that she was going to tell everyone she knew (she's one of those gossipy type girls that will tell anything to anyone even if it's not true). After about 5 minutes I collected myself and calmed myself down and merely talked to her. I felt bad, but I lied and said that I don't know what she's talking about. We had arguments back and forth and she eventually calmed down and apologized. Honestly, that was one of the happiest moments of this year to me (with the exception of trying out a molicare for the first time lol).

The morals of the story: Don't tell anyone unless you know that you can trust them for the rest of your life, even if they are friends.

In a really sick sense though I found it kinda interesting that she knew now. She is kind of attractive and I know she wore diapers until she was 12. The humiliation side of me is now out and I really wanna walk around in diapers now lol.

Just thought it would be an interesting story to share. Oh, and remember, you don't really have to admit to wearing diapers unless they have factual proof of it.

[tenderheart]

I'm glad you didn't get outed. Some people have no tact or loyalty. But then again the guy got grounded at 21 so I wouldn't expect a lot of adult/responsible behavior from them ever. Good to hear you can pull a little social engineering when you need to however.

I haven't told friends I've had for 5+ years. I've just felt that they really wouldn't want to know and I don't plan on involving them in my wearing diapers so it just isn't a topic that needs to be discussed. The people that do know have kept their mouths shut (as far as I know) so it's worked out for me nice.

[sarah_ab]

i guess my only question is, you dumped such a good friend simply because he is that close to his parents? seriously.... i mean how many of us here wish we had a 'mommy' or 'daddy' who would ground us and not let us go out and play, and here you are saying whoa sorry dude, you have restricted freedom so now we can't be friends... sorry, just sounds sorta ... well not like something someone who is such a good friend would do..

on the other hand, he may still decide to tell all your friends, so if you dont want em to knw, come up with a good cover story, like "no man what happened is we were drunk one night and coming up with crazy scenarios and he was like "would you ever wear a diaper for a girl" and i was like "well it depends on how hot she was" and so he took thatto mean i would wear diapers" something believable...

[loopy]

i guess my only question is, you dumped such a good friend simply because he is that close to his parents? seriously.... i mean how many of us here wish we had a 'mommy' or 'daddy' who would ground us and not let us go out and play, and here you are saying whoa sorry dude, you have restricted freedom so now we can't be friends... sorry, just sounds sorta ... well not like something someone who is such a good friend would do..

This, dropping a good friend because of that means you're not a good friend. Go make up with him. And tell him to move out :X

[fluff]

I'm with these two.

I know you said theres more to it but on the face of info thats how it looks.

Don't know how I would have handled your situation but it sounds a bit childish the way it was brought infront of you so hopefully it goes away...if you want it to anyway.

I mean childish with all due respect, been listening to my mate moan about his little girl all day spreading rumours on facebook and it sounds all too familiar.

[alex1]

friends and family never have to know about this part of your life. Hopefully you have learned a valuable lesson.

[Diaper273]

It was a multiple of times this happened. I seriously can't stand people who in all normality listen to everything their parents say when they are old enough to do what they want to do. Seriously, if you're grounded when you're 21, you aren't gonna say, "Okay, I accept." I was grounded when I was 19 and I told my parents that it is impossible to ground me. Eventually they agreed. But there were other things such as, I asked him to go to Warped Tour with me and he said he couldn't because his mom told him he has to go to work with her (he was one year younger at the time). He has his own car, his own life, his own body, and his own job. He basically lives in his parents house, but pays everything for himself.

In this situation, you would think he would just do what he wants and not be limited by simple words. I can't stand people who listen to authority because "they are authority". It's not only a logical fallacy, but it's unreasonable. In my lifestyle, and the things that I do, and the opinions I take, people like that bring me down and create a sense of negativity. It's not a simple, "I'm not friends with you anymore." It was thought out over a long time, but eventually I couldn't take it anymore.

"And tell him to move out :X "

Oh, I've tried. I had days lined up where we would go a multiple of apartments gradually over the few days we had off, but usually his parents told him to stay home whenever they found out.

[sarah_ab]

so basically who can't stand being friends with someone who doesn't think exactly as you do. So what if he listens to his parents a bit more than you do, so what if he respects them, while i agree at 21 he shouldn't necessarily be letting them ground him, you sound like you really just dont want to put any work or understanding into the friendship, i'm thinking he may be better off with a friend who actually respects his decisions. If he's not being abused in any way, then he is making his own choice and a true friend while offering guidance and help if necessary would understand he is making his own decison and honor and respect that.

And a true friend also would keep your confidences, and he clearly has not, so it seems that the two of you were never meant to be true friends anyway.

[d_drew12]

Here's the deal with grounding. At 18, you are legally an adult. If you are living with your parents, you live under their roof and their rules. If you don't like them, move the F out, be the adult you think you are and you can play by whatever rules you want under YOUR own roof. Until then, shut-up and put-up or get out. You may not like the grounding, but how else are they suppose to enforce the rules without the parent putting the kid on the street? I suppose you could charge them for there mistakes but it's not really a "Let's make a Deal" situation. I'll be damned if say I have a 21 year old kid living at home, say we have a curfew at the house, he keeps breaking it and he tells me there's nothing I can do about it, you can't touch me or stop me, I'm an adult. My response would be, good, tommorrow you can start being an adult at your own place, your out, pack your sh!t and leave! What are my options, some sort of parental punishment ie grounding, or here's your bags, get out? As a parent, you'll want to help your child so you won't want to put them out so your alternative is some parental punishment. This is a very touchy situation between parents and children. If it was a basic group of tenants, it would be a different story, you wouldn't be able to ground them obviously. However, they would probably be able to evict them if they weren't abiding by the house rules set forth before when they all agreed to cohabitate under one roof. It would be considered "distrubing the peace" and it's been won in court cases across the country. This kid in a way should be damn lucky his parents are only grounding him and not evicting him and putting him on the street. I don't like or agree with the grounding but again, better than the alternative.

If instead of it being his parents he broke some house rules with you in your house, what would you do? If it were me in my house, it'd be get outta my house!

Put yourself in the parents shoes. Don't think just because your 18, you're above the rules. You'll think your real smart until you're sitting on the curb with no where to go thinking, maybe I should've just listened to them and followed there rules.

[curiositykilledthecat]

Go apologize to your friend and make up. You broke up your friendship over something stupid. My closest friend's grandmother thought i was a crack dealer when I first met her, I didn't call it quits then.(old people seem to think a like for pit bulls means you deal drugs)

[tenderheart]

And a true friend also would keep your confidences, and he clearly has not, so it seems that the two of you were never meant to be true friends anyway.

Quoted for truth

[Coodie]

It was a multiple of times this happened. I seriously can't stand people who in all normality listen to everything their parents say when they are old enough to do what they want to do. Seriously, if you're grounded when you're 21, you aren't gonna say, "Okay, I accept." I was grounded when I was 19 and I told my parents that it is impossible to ground me. Eventually they agreed. But there were other things such as, I asked him to go to Warped Tour with me and he said he couldn't because his mom told him he has to go to work with her (he was one year younger at the time). He has his own car, his own life, his own body, and his own job. He basically lives in his parents house, but pays everything for himself.

In this situation, you would think he would just do what he wants and not be limited by simple words. I can't stand people who listen to authority because "they are authority". It's not only a logical fallacy, but it's unreasonable. In my lifestyle, and the things that I do, and the opinions I take, people like that bring me down and create a sense of negativity. It's not a simple, "I'm not friends with you anymore." It was thought out over a long time, but eventually I couldn't take it anymore.

"And tell him to move out :X "

Oh, I've tried. I had days lined up where we would go a multiple of apartments gradually over the few days we had off, but usually his parents told him to stay home whenever they found out.

You either have to move out and make it on your own, or you have to respect your parents authority. Anyway, I think being grounded is silly...should just put him back in nappies as punishment ;-)

[loopy]

Here's the deal with grounding. At 18, you are legally an adult. If you are living with your parents, you live under their roof and their rules. If you don't like them, move the F out, be the adult you think you are and you can play by whatever rules you want under YOUR own roof. Until then, shut-up and put-up or get out. You may not like the grounding, but how else are they suppose to enforce the rules without the parent putting the kid on the street? I suppose you could charge them for there mistakes but it's not really a "Let's make a Deal" situation. I'll be damned if say I have a 21 year old kid living at home, say we have a curfew at the house, he keeps breaking it and he tells me there's nothing I can do about it, you can't touch me or stop me, I'm an adult. My response would be, good, tommorrow you can start being an adult at your own place, your out, pack your sh!t and leave! What are my options, some sort of parental punishment ie grounding, or here's your bags, get out? As a parent, you'll want to help your child so you won't want to put them out so your alternative is some parental punishment. This is a very touchy situation between parents and children. If it was a basic group of tenants, it would be a different story, you wouldn't be able to ground them obviously. However, they would probably be able to evict them if they weren't abiding by the house rules set forth before when they all agreed to cohabitate under one roof. It would be considered "distrubing the peace" and it's been won in court cases across the country. This kid in a way should be damn lucky his parents are only grounding him and not evicting him and putting him on the street. I don't like or agree with the grounding but again, better than the alternative.

If instead of it being his parents he broke some house rules with you in your house, what would you do? If it were me in my house, it'd be get outta my house!

Put yourself in the parents shoes. Don't think just because your 18, you're above the rules. You'll think your real smart until you're sitting on the curb with no where to go thinking, maybe I should've just listened to them and followed there rules.

I guess my thinking is... he's 21 he should be able to respect their rules, and they should respect him as an adult. Ok you live under the same roof, got rules to follow. But that doesn't mean treating him like a bratty teenager.

When I was 21 and living at home, if I did anything "bad" It would lead to a discussion, not punishment. Guess cause I paid my way, and did house work its a bit hard to "punish" me. 21 year olds shouldn't need punishment simple as. If they keep treating him like a child he'll stay a child.

[d_drew12]

I guess my thinking is... he's 21 he should be able to respect their rules, and they should respect him as an adult. Ok you live under the same roof, got rules to follow. But that doesn't mean treating him like a bratty teenager.

When I was 21 and living at home, if I did anything "bad" It would lead to a discussion, not punishment. Guess cause I paid my way, and did house work its a bit hard to "punish" me. 21 year olds shouldn't need punishment simple as. If they keep treating him like a child he'll stay a child.

Yeah, a discussion should probably be the solution. My question is what do you do if they don't change. You can only discuss something so many times. Since we don't know if this kids a repeat offender or not, we can't really say if the parents gave him the chance to talk it out or not first or what. Most parents aren't going to want to put there kid out so after there blue in the face from "discussing" it, they'll probably resort to other means and unfortunately there the "parental" punishments like grounding. It does sound rediculous but damn, I wouldn't want to deal with a mouthy teenager who thinks he can do whatever just because he's over 18 yet still lives in my house. My question is, what do you do when discussing it fails yet you don't want to put him out?

[timmyc]

might be embarrassing, but getting outed won't destroy your life. I am all for AB play and live a younger lifestyle than my age might dictate, but wow I think all three of you need to grow up some.

[loopy]

Yeah, a discussion should probably be the solution. My question is what do you do if they don't change. You can only discuss something so many times. Since we don't know if this kids a repeat offender or not, we can't really say if the parents gave him the chance to talk it out or not first or what. Most parents aren't going to want to put there kid out so after there blue in the face from "discussing" it, they'll probably resort to other means and unfortunately there the "parental" punishments like grounding. It does sound rediculous but damn, I wouldn't want to deal with a mouthy teenager who thinks he can do whatever just because he's over 18 yet still lives in my house. My question is, what do you do when discussing it fails yet you don't want to put him out?

Kick him in the head? 21 is not the same as a teenager, if he keeps doing shit, and its that bad then kick him out. At 21 you're not just legally an adult, you are an adult. If he still acts like a spoilt little brat then well its time to teach him about the big bad world. Maybe its just me, but any child I bring up... I hope that by the time he's 21 he's old enough to take responsibility for his actions. If he stays out all night then he better know he's getting up in the morning. If he gets into a fight and ends up in the cells overnight, he better know that I won't be picking him up.

21 is so far past the point for punishment, it should be far past the point when who ever should realize its their responsibility. Still having to punish someone at that age? Then they haven't be brought up right.

Of course, we don't know what he's done. Is he being grounded cause the cops caught him in a crack den? or fighting? or is he being grounded cause he didn't do all his chores?

[diaperboyMKE]

friends and family never have to know about this part of your life. Hopefully you have learned a valuable lesson.

Agreed. I told a GF once, a long long time ago. When we broke up, she told some of her friends. Lucky for me, I was able to convince those people she was nuts. I mean she can't come up with something more believable? I like wearing a diaper?! ROFL! Gooo goooo gaaaa gaaaa, (laughter).

[ranger]

When I turned 18, I started paying rent and still lived by my parents rules. My problem with this whole thing is what is a 21 yr old doing that deserves punishment. The most trouble I got into after I turned 18, was after a fight with my sister. She sucker punched me, I punched back. That ended in a discussion not grounding though. Here is how the discussion went....

Dad: "You're both over eighteen. You don't have to live here anymore. If either of you touchs the other again, you're both out."

END OF DISCUSSION.

[loopy]

When I turned 18, I started paying rent and still lived by my parents rules. My problem with this whole thing is what is a 21 yr old doing that deserves punishment. The most trouble I got into after I turned 18, was after a fight with my sister. She sucker punched me, I punched back. That ended in a discussion not grounding though. Here is how the discussion went....

Dad: "You're both over eighteen. You don't have to live here anymore. If either of you touchs the other again, you're both out."

END OF DISCUSSION.

+1

Thats what i'm talking about.

Fights with sisters is a given through, i broke my little toe fighting with my sis, was 12 at the time . Mario kart, vodka and foo fighters with sis is more fun

[curiositykilledthecat]

All I can think of is South Park now. "How do you ground the ungroundable?"

[d_drew12]

Some parents just can't stomach throwing there kids out over rules. Feel they're being nicer to them by some other form of punishment. I don't agree with it, just saying they don't have the heart to say "get out". I don't know what this kid is doing but when I lived at home I didn't really have a curfew, like you said, I must be responsible for myself. However, I wasn't the type to have friends over playing loud music or making a disturbance at the house that would cause other family member to wake up early on a work night. I was very low key at home. Eventually, I had a falling out with my dad because he was snapping his fingers wanting me to do things when he wanted them done even if I was working on something else, his was priority ONE. Whether it be fix the car, mow the law, help him do whateter, or even take out the garbage, ordering me around like a little bitch, I said no, I'm not your slave so I'm out. Much more to the story including restraining order, jail and dad getting kicked out of his own home while I got to live there. All this caused me to buy my own house and was the best thing that ever happened to me in hinesight.

[Diaper273]

I don't think I broke our friendship over something stupid. When I was 18, the SECOND I turned 18, my parents asked me for a rent check, health insurance check, car insurance, phone bill, internet bill, and everything else I used. I did all of that. Sometimes I wouldn't pay it, but they could do nothing about it. Why?

In our society, the supreme law recognizes a person over 18 as almost a complete individual. 21 is the complete individual. Your parents chose to have you or adopt you on the basis that they recognized that this would happen eventually. If they don't want you to disobey their rules once you were old enough to be recognized as an individual, then they shouldn't have had intercourse or adopted you in thus having you.

It might seem strange, but it's true. True to that my parents would kick me out, but then why would they do that if they think I would fail. The last rule of parenting? Don't let your son or daughter leave until they are READY to leave. And if they are never ready to leave, then tell them not to have kids.

Plus, other thigns occured within his family, but I felt it was not necessary to reveal everything about him. Unlike him, I can control who I tell what to. If I feel that information that I know about him needs to be told, then I will tell it, but I wouldn't tell anything about him for revenge.

Also, what I value is friends in individuality. Did he speak his mind? No. Did he follow his dreams? No. He wanted to be an artist. He wanted to go to university to major in art, but his parents said he had to become a doctor, or a psychologist. It's obvious what they want for him. They want to money they can eventually reap from him. I might be completely wrong, but a reasonable theory is that if you don't go to college for something that you enjoy, then you won't enjoy life. I used to surround myself with depressing people. They all hate politics, they all were addicted to drugs, most dropped out of school, and 99% of them ended up stabbing me in the back. Now I have a new life and a new objective. I can't let people with such minimal thinking be around me. It would be counteractive.

It would actually be better to let those people die off and let the strong, more intelligent people survive.

Dam, I have gone into a rant. I was always told I think too deeply into simple things.

[ranger]

Kids seem to think they are entitled to have everything in life handed to them. I am glad I was raised to have respect for others and myself, and to work for what I wanted and needed. I got a job, started paying for my own car, insurance, clothes, etc. when I turned sixteen. I lived at home til I was 24. I chose to work and not go to college, so I paid rent. It was a privilege not a right that I got to live at home. Because it was a privilege, and I respected my parents, I lived by their rules. The deal in my family was go to school, live rent free. No school, work and pay rent. The chores and rules were a fair trade versus paying for every single thing myself, water, heat, food, electric, etc. Had I chosen to go to college and had my parents been able to pay for it, then they would have had every right to influence what I studied. Otherwise, I would have done my own thing and not expected them to pay.

[sarah_ab]

well clearly you have all the answers, so theres no point in even posting here anymore.

[d_drew12]

If they don't want you to disobey their rules once you were old enough to be recognized as an individual, then they shouldn't have had intercourse or adopted you in thus having you.

It might seem strange, but it's true. True to that my parents would kick me out, but then why would they do that if they think I would fail. The last rule of parenting? Don't let your son or daughter leave until they are READY to leave. And if they are never ready to leave, then tell them not to have kids.

Wow, you have the most F-d up perspective on parents and children I have seen. So they should know they'll have a bastard child like you before they decide to have children like they have a crystal ball of life. Ahhh, yeah, if everyone had your theory, no one would ever have been born. I'm not sure but your sentances really makes nooooo sense.

Don't let your child leave til there ready and if that never happens, well, guess you shouldn've never had her in the first place. Would've known if you saw into the future that night you made her?

Parents have children for all sorts of reasons.

There's a real reason the say, kick you out of the nest. The momma bird actually kicks the birds out and if they fly, good, if not, splat. The bird wouldn't leave unless it had the shove though. Natures full of stuff like this, teach and boot, your on your own. Figure the rest out on your own. You have a brain.