Well unfortunately I can't answer this that well for you cuz I've never told a girl that I was with that I like diapers but hopefully someday she could accept it. Maybe get her to read into it or show her the site.
I'm wearing the depends for men flex fit right now and they are comfortable but they can't hold that much. I did soak it pretty well though.. it says max absorbancy but it's probably only meant for a light wetting.