[The Invouluntarily Incontinent Point Of View......]

... on an unrelated note - its nice to see a 'controversial' thread filled with well well-argued points in reasoned posts thus far untainted by trolls

Whilst I don't agree with all of the opinions expressed in this thread, I do agree with Zander that it is great to see well-argued points in reasoned posts.

Please keep this thread going. It is cathartic and bringing some sanity to this topic.

[The Invouluntarily Incontinent Point Of View......]

Great post Bettypooh.

[The Invouluntarily Incontinent Point Of View......]

To XyXy and Creepymouse, I think that you have the wrong idea of what we are saying. I have no problem is someone wants to wear and use diapers 24/7. I have no problem if someone enjoys their diapers and prefers being in them than out of them. I can completely understand the feelings of safety and security that they bring.

We are saying 2 things though. Firstly, if this is a decision that you want to make, please fully inform yourself of all the consequences, including financial, social and lifestyle ones first. Secondly, don't do anything permanent that you will regret later and can't reverse.

I have no problem with people who, with full knowledge of the consequences, choose to "untrain" themselves as they should be equally able to train themselves again if they want to. However when I see threads about surgery to cause voluntary and permanent incontinence, I do get upset.

I understand that this is an incontinence desires page, and I am supportive of people having their desires. I am just sharing my experiences so that people can make informed decisions.

[The Invouluntarily Incontinent Point Of View......]

Bravo Allen,

I'm not going to flame you. I became incontinent 5 years ago, also through a spinal injury (dirtbike accident not shovelling snow), and have to wear 24/7 since.

Fortunately I have a lot of family support both financially and emotionally, as because they all either saw me when I had my accident or in the hospital for the long months afterwards, they understand that I don't have bladder or bowel control. Friends though are a different story. Going through something like this, and being incontinent does show you who your real friends are. People that stick by you through embarrassing situations and stick up for you are gold. Unfortunately, too many people you think are your friends will abandon you when they think that you have embarrassed them by leaking (either pee or poop) in public.

Whilst (after 5 years) I am coming to terms with my need to be in diapers 24/7, it is definitely something I would rather not have to deal with. Even if you want to wear 24/7 and use your diapers as you wish, it is still better to have control than to not have control.

Like Allen says, if you are considering voluntarily becoming incontinent, think very carefully about it first.

Jane

[Unplanned Public Messing]

Tiggerboy,

That sounds quite traumatic for you. Unfortunately, these sort of occurences can happen to me when I least expect it. As I have no control, it can be quite shaking when heavy messing strikes unexpectedly.

You have my thoughts.

Jane

[How To Do I Weaken My Bowels]

In my opinion, going 24/7 for a week is not enough. I have gone way longer then two weeks and it was fun! (of course I don't and never went number 2 in my diaper) You need to not just go 24/7 but you need to just release no matter where you are. You need to poop your diaper in front of all of your friends, family, employers, teachers...everyone! They don't need to know that you are pooping your pants but you need to do it right in front of those you might not want to know. My reason for saying so is that is the reality of being incontinent. The reality is that once you are your body is not just gonna gain control temporarily because your embarrassed in front of a friend or your class mates or in front of your boss. Actually you should walk into your bosses office and ask for a raise! right after you ask him for a raise poop your diaper! If you can handle doing that uncontrollably in front of all those you care about or those your friends with then there you go. That is why I do not want that, because it is just as easy to do it when You want.

Good Luck!

Kato_pup ^=^

Well you could shovel a lot of wet, heavy snow using your back and hopefully rupture a disc at l5-s1 or l4-l5. That will make you incontinent (or maybe not depending where the rupture is).

You really DO NOT want bowel incon. I have the type of bowel problems that you are seeking and trust me it isn't fun. Luckily for me it only happens when I have diarrhea or soft to semi-hard stools and that part I can manage so that it doesn't happen very often. And a word of advice, by the time you realize that you have to go, you already are. There is no real warning that you only have a few seconds to get to the bathroom.

I have to agree with padded_husky on this. Wear 24/7 for 1 to 2 months and go only in your diaper. Get some Miralax or the nasty citrus stuff that you have to drink just before a colonoscopy. That will get you close to what you want. Then do that regimen for at least 2 weeks after you have been 24/7 for at least 2 weeks. If you aren't giving thanks that you are continent after that, then you really do need to get some mental help. And I also agree with p_h on going in front of everyone including family, friends, strangers, bosses, co-workers, church members, a crowded mall, a movie theater, public transportation (bus, subway, train, etc.), or a host of other locations that you will not be able to get out of quickly enough to go change. Everyone will know then.

Then to top it off, poop unlike pee, is not absorbed by the diaper, just contained. So leakage out of a diaper becomes a big problem if you aren't lucky enough to have the diaper contain it.

Allen

Ditto and Aaaaaaay-men! Many of those new to diapers do seem to think it would be fun or pleasant having incontinence; and I did too but few of those who accomplish it want to remain that way Kudos to those who do- everyone should pursue their goals If you want a better understanding at little risk, do the following- and no cheating:

Wherever you go, take a diaper and whatever else you need for a change. Not a substitute, the real things only If your stay is long, bring enough diapers for that. Plan on changing every 3-4 hours or more to keep odors and rashes minimized Every time you'd need a change, go to where you would handle that and spend 4-5 minutes there. While you're doing that, also simulate disposal of the used diaper- you might not find that quite as easy as you think Figure out how much being 24/7 is going to cost you, then pull that much from your budget- once again, no cheating. If you need that money for a mechanic to fix your car, you walk until you can pay for the repairs- that 'extra' money no longer exists and never will again If you go that long, about once a month in the morning choose a word you might hear later that day. Upon hearing anyone say that word you must go change your pants immediately just as you would have to do if you leaked- which you are certainly going to do in real life If that causes you to miss the bus going to work, then too bad- get over it. Remember, you wanted it this way Every couple weeks do something that embarrasses the heck out of you to simulate what you're going to feel like if someone figures out that you're voiding right there in front of them. Use a chosen word to time this just as mentioned above- you are no longer in control, remember? Do it even if it's someone you're trying to date Get the picture now? If it still appeals to you then go for it

Everyone should do the things which make them happy and this might be your bliss But to many, it's more like a nightmare that has no end and no options, and to others like myself whose urinary leakage is small diapers are just the underwear you put on in the morning- nice, but no longer 'special'. The initial appeal of wearing diapers for need can go away quickly when reality sets in

In everything you do or try, do it carefully and sensibly and the odds are that things will work out for the best in the end, and if not then don't worry about that- you know you gave it your best and that's all anyone can do

Bettypooh

Akhenaton,

As someone who is medically incontinent due to spinal injury, I implore you to listen to the very wise words being offered to you by padded_husky, Allen and Bettypooh.

Having bowel incontinence is not fun. You may enjoy pooping in your diapers at convenient times, but not having control over your bowels is a completely different situation. As Bettypooh pointed out, it is also very very expensive. Unlike wet diapers that you might be able to stay in for a little time, you have to change a poopy diaper as soon as possible, otherwise you will have serious problems and will cause distress to all the people around you. You will also find that it impacts on your activities.

If you want to simulate bowel incontinence through laxatives when you are in control of the situation then that is one thing, but to voluntarility cause yourself permanent physiological harm is not a good idea.

Jane

[Plastic Pants]

I don't know if this is the right forum for this thread, but what are people's thoughts on the best plastic pants.

I have found that there are some good options on Amazon, and have recently found the Leakmaster PUL diaper pants. These are so much more comfortable than the other ones that I have, and are very good at protecting me from leaks.

Given that I am incontinent and wear diapers 24/7 (although I don't wear plastic at night), the comfort and protection from my plastic pants is a huge issue for me.

[Best Brand For Holding In Poop?]

Other than Molicares, I also wear depends a lot, although with the Depends I always need plastic pants as they can leak a lot more. I agree with the Square Duck though that for the price, the Depends are a good option.

[Wearing To Work?]

I don't have a choice either, and someone noticing a diaper is a lot less devastating than the alternatives...

[Showing Off Your Diaper]

I never show off my diapers in public. They are something that I have to wear, and like my "normal" underwear before my accident, they are private and not for public exhibition.

[Your Favorite Unexpected Benefits Of Diapers]

Not having to use a lot of unpleasant public toilets is a real plus.

Whilst I am on a regimented bowel control programme, if I am out and the only toilet options are not places that I would sit down, then I take my chances with my diaper.

[Is There Anything Wrong With This?]

I found it much easier to manage my incon with diaper changes compared to being so concerned about getting to the bathroom in time and watching the clock for for bowel management. Now, I don't worry about any of it,.........whatever happens happens and there is no stress. I kinda think most people that are incon after a while do the same as me and just give up tring to make it to the bathroom in time. Who care if you use the diaper when your already incon? Obviously, there are people that are incon that never give up trying to make it to the bathroom in time and would think using the diaper is disgusting. I would have felt the same way when I first became incon, but over time I changed thoughts and found it to be easier with no worries just to use the diaper.

After 5 years and a lot of therapy, I have been encouraged along the bowel management line. It actually stresses me some of the time having to go to the toilet at specific times, but I still persist. I guess that after fighting my way back from a serious spinal injury and getting control back over some areas of my life, I am a little scared of losing the little semblance of control that I do have over my toileting (even if I have virtually no control over my bladder and very little bowel control).

What was the trigger for you to "let go" of your bowel management techniques and "surrender" to using your diapers? What was the reaction from your doctor(s) or therapists at that time?

[Best Brand For Holding In Poop?]

I have found that the Molicares work quite well.

I try to avoid pooping when I can, but I will usually poop my diapers every couple of days, and the Molicares are better than other brands I have tried.

When I am out though, I always wear plastic pants for better leak protection, so the poop is well contained anyway.

[Sexy Diaper Commercial]

Great ad.

My type of guy.

[Depend's Brand]

I have been using Depends for a while, and the thing I like about them is that they are discreet.

Their leg bands don't stop leaks as well as some others, but they can be worn without being too obvious. If I am going out though, I need to wear plastic pants over them to stop leaks.

[Smells]

Unfortunately, when you don't have a choiceand mess most days, there is a smell that starts to hang around.

I clean as best as I can, and use anti-bacterial wash with all clothes washes, but there is still a lingering smell.

It has just become normal, as I don't think there is much more I can do.

[Messing]

Occasionally I feel some pleasure after I have messed my diaper, but usually I want to clean up as fast as possible.

[Have You Ever Peed Your Diaper Without Knowing It?]

Every night and sometimes during the day.

Unfortunately without control, I don't know until it is too late.

[Your Royal Name]

Lady Ingrid Fluffy-Steele

[Hi All]

Hello and welcome to DD We're a pretty diverse lot here but for the most part good people who understand For a better understanding of the forums check out the first topic in "Scoop the Poop". Hope you enjoy your time here

Bettypooh

Thanks Bettypooh.

[If You Could Go Back To Not Needing Would You]

I would love to have normal bladder and bowel control, but sort of as a coping mechanism of sorts (since I will never have normal control again) I really don't mind diapers. I go to the bathroom so much that it is kinda nice not to be a slave to the bathroom. A lot of the reason I wear is because before I did, the chance of having accidents was so anxiety provoking for me that I was not able to lead a normal life. Now, if I suddenly have to go, it is very nice to be able to go without having to rush to the toilet. I have only a minute or so before I go, whether I am near a bathroom or not, so not having to hold it means I am much more comfortable. I hate the occasional leaks we all get, but it is still better than completely soaking my pants...because I would if I wasn't wearing a diaper. I don't think I would give diapers up, no. I just would like to be able to take it off without fear of pee running down my leg or soiling myself. If this makes sense, being back in diapers gives me a sense of security.

Wetgal, I admire your thoughts on this. Even after 5 years, I am not yet that accepting of my condition that I would choose to stay in nappies if I didn't have to. Maybe with time, this level of acceptance will come.

In a heartbeat, I would choose to have control over my bodily functions again and be "normal".

[Dating And Incontinence]

A lot of the posts seem to be about serious relationships and partner acceptance.

What about when you are young and looking to go out with a guy who you like and just want to have fun like a normal date. When they find out you are wearing nappies/diapers, even though there is a medical need for it, most young guys don't have the emotional maturity to deal with it.

I have had great support from those of my female friends and a few of my male friends who stuck by me after my accident, but it is much harder to meet new people at this age with incontinence. Most people just don't understand

[Hi All]

Hi, I'm Jane and I live in Brisbane, Australia.

I am 20 years old and have been incontinent since I was 15 when I had a dirt-bike accident on a friend's farm and damaged my spine. My spine eventually recovered, but it has left some lasting nerve damage, and has left me with profound urinary incontinence and some faecal incontinence too.

Tahnks to a lot of rehab therapy and a regimented toilet programme, I can avoid a lot of accidents, but I still need to be in nappies/diapers permanently for those few times each day...

Given the young age that my accident happened and the age I am now, it has been a really traumatic few years for me. Finishing high school (admittedly with a year off whilst I recovered from my accident), and trying to socialise is not easy when you can't control your bodily functions. It is also very emotionally damaging.

I am so grateful though to all those people who supported me in learning to walk again and recover most of my bodily functions, and to all the therapists and counsellors who have supported me in coming to terms with what will most likely be a lifelong issue. I can only hope that future medical technology will be able to do something to help me.

In the meantime, I have learned to accept my need for nappies and am even starting to enjoy them. I wouldn't consider myself a DL yet, and definitely not an AB. Indeed I am quite happy being my own age. I am looking forward to hearing about the experiences of others with medical incontinence, and those who understand wearing and using nappies.

[Diaper Pail At Work]

Fortunately the female toilets at work have sanitary bins, but most of them say "No Nappies". When I only need to change a booster pad, that is ok, but when a full nappy gets soaked, I reluctantly have to use them as there are no other safe options.

It would be very helpful to have a nappy disposal bin available.