[​​Moonlight Shadow​ Updated 6-8-25]

A short lil update, but it's still an update. I wanted to get at least a lil something up before the new year!

 

“Well, here we are. Public portaloos. Latrines? Isn’t that French?”  They stood outside an old brick building defaced with graffiti. The doors were scraped and dented and a nearby garbage can overflowed. The public bathroom was located in a strip of small mom and pop shops whose glory days were long gone.

 

Sam shrugged as Zoey set him down on his feet, made sure he had his balance, and got him settled with his crutches and his purple bag. 

 

He hesitated, insecurity getting the best of him. He stared at old wads of gum on the sidewalk, trying to muster his courage before he timidly spoke up.  “Are…are you gonna be here when I come out? Maybe we could…hang out or something? If you’re not busy?”  He trailed off lamely. He wanted to look Zoey in the eye, but couldn’t bear even the thought of rejection in her gaze. 

 

He missed her surprised, soft smile. “I’d like that. We could catch a parade.”

 

Sam peeked up at her, reassured by her smile, and gave a nod before going into the family and disabled toilet. It was a public bathroom during a huge celebration, but Sam expected it to be filthier than it was. No way in hell would he risk getting near that toilet; even from the door he could see splashes of dried pee, streaks of old menstrual blood.  All three toilet paper rolls were empty. At least there wasn’t poop smeared all over the place. 

 

He cringed. He had to pee but he could hold it until he found a nicer bathroom. He was just going to finally do what he came here to do. Put his pullup and skirt on.  He hung his purple bag on the back of the door. The little pink werewolf plushy hanging off his bag bounced. 

 

He unzipped his jeans and opened his bag. His bubblegum pink pullup was on top of his jean skirt, ready to go. It was a premium grade product, thicker than the cheap generic brands that barely held anything and leaked easily, but it was still thinner, quieter, and more discreet than a diaper. He preferred diapers, but the color was cute and he would be too nervous and insecure in an actual diaper, paranoid people would notice. He wished his pullup had cute baby designs but that was too risky. A solid color was his best bet for both cute and safety. If anyone ever saw his pullup-God forbid- they would think it was a medical need, not kinky perversion.

 

Now what? He had never changed in a public toilet before. A filthy public toilet. To get his pullup on, his pants had to come off. So did his shoes. He eyed the gritty tiled floor that was crawling with God knew how many and what germs, viruses, and diseases. People were disgusting piggish creatures. The floor had probably been pissed and shit on from people too high, drunk, lazy or stupid to hit the toilet. No way was he taking his shoes off and stepping on that vile floor. 

 

Revulsion and horror filled him at the thought. He wanted to flee back to his motel, where he knew it was clean because he’d cleaned it himself when he first arrived in New Orleans. He’d gone to a dollar store for off brand disinfecting wipes and cleaned every major surface, along with an aerosol fabric disinfectant for the upholstery and a spray that killed and prevented bed bugs. 

 

He ruthlessly squashed the urge before it could build into a full blown panic attack. He had to go through with this. Needed to. Maybe that’s why his gut told him to stay at the diner? Meeting Zoey, Joonie, and Josie was the catalyst he needed to get over his own fears and insecurities, learn to accept himself for who he was. 

 

The handicap stall was roomy enough for a wheelchair to maneuver with ease. Grab bars were everywhere. Germ covered grab bars. Sam wrinkled his pert nose. He pulled out several paper towels from the dispenser and laid them on the floor. He balanced himself with one crutch and took his boots off. They were specially designed to accommodate his foot braces. 

 

He stood on the paper towels, protecting the bottom of his plastic braces from all the gross grime on the floor.  He pushed his boy jeans and plain boring blue boxer briefs down his legs and one foot at a time stepped out of them. He had to push and maneuver them over his braces; the hem of the leg hole caught and snagged on the rivets that attached the thick velcro straps to the plastic brace. 

 

He tugged it free, lost his balance and wobbled. He caught himself on the door and saved himself from slipping or falling. This would be so much easier if he had help. His heart hammered at the thought. Zoey, changing him? Part of him loved the daydream, the other part of him wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. 

 

He took the pink pullup out of his bag. He was naked from the waist down in a public toilet. It was Mardi Gras; people were probably having a lot of drunken sex in public toilets. Maybe even this very toilet. The thought made his skin crawl.

 

“Sam, you okay in there?”

 

Sam jumped at Zoey’s voice.  “Y-yeah. Almost done. Gimme a min.”  

 

Stop thinking. Don’t spiral and panic. His thoughts started racing as he stared down at the bubblegum pink padding in his hand. So thin compared to poor Joonie’s monster diapers. A diaper would be easier to put on.

 

 He wondered if Josie changed Joonie’s diapers. In the restaurant, Josie had looked at Joonie with such soft love in her eyes and Joonie trusted her completely. Their feelings for each other were evident even in Sam’s brief meeting with them. Jealousy ate at Sam. He wanted that; a sincere deep connection with someone who knew him so well they could practically read his mind. 

An image of Zoey changing his big poofy diapers flashed through his head. His heart leapt into his throat. Face red, hands trembling, Sam squashed his wild imagination and opened up the pullup.  

 

The thoughts kept popping back up. Zoey helping him get dressed. He violently shook his head to get rid of the mental images. She was a stranger he literally just met at lunch. It was bad enough she knew about his pullups. Or maybe it wasn’t that bad? Her questioning his lack of padding prompted him into this mess. 

 

His imagination pictured Zoey helping him. Her hands holding out the pullup. Sliding it up his thighs, fingers ghosting over his skin. He felt hot all over and shuddered in both dread and longing. 

 

Was this what people who had sex in public toilets with strangers felt? They just cut off the rational thought and gave into desire? Let the good times roll. So, let the padded times roll. It’s why he came here. 

 

Sam took a deep breath, lifted his feet one at a time, and stepped into the pullup. It easily stretched wide enough to accommodate his braces. The stiff plastic held his wobbly ankles in a fixed position. It allowed him to walk, but it made getting dressed more difficult since he could not flex his feet or point his toes. He wobbled on one crutch, almost losing his balance a few times when the paper towels slipped. Eventually, he stood in his hoodie and pink pullup. 

 

Heaven. Perfection. A sense of right, of being whole, enveloped him. This was the underwear he was meant to be in. Only a diaper would be better. But he wasn’t ready for that yet, especially after seeing people notice Joonie’s thick diaper. Baby steps. No shame. Only a sense of completeness. Part of him wished for a mirror; the other half of him was afraid his reflection would make him lose his nerve. 

 

The jean skirt was much easier to put on, physically and mentally. It was a modest A-line cut that fell modestly just below his knees. He finished up with a pair of white, fleece lined tights to keep his legs warm. Putting those on was almost as tricky as his pullup, especially since he had to lean against the door and take his braces off one at a time to put the tights on. He put his boots back on and was finished. 

 

Sam hesitated to leave the bathroom and face the world. He really should try to pee while he was here. One glance at the disgusting seat swiftly changed his mind. Besides, he took long enough. Zoey was still waiting. He hoped. His heart pinched at hte thought of her getting bored and wandering off. She wasn’t that much of a jerk, right?

[Building an AB/DL Baby Gym]

That looks really awesome! Kudos! And ty for sharing pictures of it! Your nursery looks awesome!

[thrift store find]

It's been a while, but years ago I used to frequently find diapers in a local thrift store. It was my main source of diapers as a broke ass college student when I was first exploring the world of ABDL and only wore diapers once in a blue moon. 

It's awesome when you find a bag of diapers. I've never seen any high end diapers but I'm sure some lucky ducks out there have! Kudos if you're one of them!

[Bad Seed (updated 5-24-25)]

There's typos. Lots of typos I need to go back and correct when I have more mental energy. Apologies. It's been a while since an update, so I figured a typo-riddled update was still something. I do intend to go back and correct things. 

 

“I get it now. What you were hinting at before- the lesson you wanted me to figure out for myself.”  Lili shifted from foot to foot, scowling down at her rose pink sweater.  After all this time, she still felt like she was wearing a stranger’s skin. Prissy’s clothes.  A mast of social acceptability.

 

“And what did you figure out?”  Asha asked calmly as she sorted through a variety of shopping bags from brand-name boutiques at Mapleton’s upscale mall.  She never glanced at Lili. 

 

“These clothes. It’s not about me. Who I am, my self expression. It’s all just an image, it influences what other people think.  And that’s important...because if you know what your image says, then you can influence what they think. You can manipulate them. I still don’t care about them, but now I see how controlling what those lemmings think is a useful tool.”

 

Asha lifted a silk blouse, folding it up then setting it on the bed. “It’s not about caring at all. You need to learn to be subtle. Speaking of that, this is the first time you’ve ever been so blunt with me. It’s not an endearing trait.”

 

Lili winced at the reprimand. “Subtle has never been my strong point.” 

 

Asha sighed, not hiding her disappointment.  “I know. We all know.”  She reached into another bag. “It’s a useful too, too.”

 

Lili’s fingers curled into fists. “Maybe you’re too subtle. Don’t you ever get tired of your games?”

 

Asha laughed. “Do you?”

 

Lili grit her teeth, frustration twisting into annoyance and anger. Getting angry with Asha never solved anything; it just made the older woman push her buttons more. In all these years, she still hadn’t figured out just how to handle Asha. The older woman always kept her on her toes. Just when she thought she had the game figured out, the rules changed.

 

Lili didn’t answer; she just glowered while her grandfather’s mistress unpacked from her shopping trip.  Cameron was asleep in Lili’s bed, tucked in with pillows and blankets on either side of him to keep him from accidentally rolling off the bed. He was used to sleeping in a crib, and she was afraid he’d hurt himself. Grandpa Jack was at a meeting with his financial advisors. Grandma Jill would be coming home soon- most likely with Beatrice in tow. Beatrice always visited with Jill after a Society meeting so they could gossip about it. 

 

Lili had stumbled upon Asha by accident. She’d been on her way back from the bathroom when she saw Asha returning from shopping. The next phase of Lili’s ½ baked plan involved cornering Beatrice and letting Cameron be a big boy again. She had no clue how she’d do that. She was in over her head and she knew she needed help. She’d seen Asha and pounced. Now here she was, making a mess of it. 

 

She took a deep breath and forced her fists to unclench.  “Yes.”  Her words were even more blunt than before. She struggled with being subtle; it was never her style. Even after all these years, she still had trouble reading Asha, figuring out what her angle was let alone fathoming her motivation. She nervously played with her piercings then laid all her cards on the table.  “I know you’re trying to teach me life lessons and how to be like you, but I suck at figuring that shit out. This isn’t about me. Cameron, the boy you’ve had me babysitting-”

 

“He’s going to be sent back to a regression hospital. Don’t look so surprised. I know all about it- probably more than you do.”  Asha spoke calmly. She set her bags on the floor then eased herself onto the king sized bed, kicking off her shoes. She smiled at the bewildered, shell-shocked look on Lili’s face then patted the bed besides her. Both invitation and command to come sit. 

 

Lili was numb all over, her limbs felt heavy and she stumbled. That revelation doused her fire and desperation. She knew she shouldn’t be surprised by this. Asha always knew everything. But this was something she was sure was top secret; she’d only found out by snooping through Beatrice’s private papers. 

 

Asha’s dark eyes glittered with delight at her confusion. She loved holding all the cards while others blundered in the dark.  “I had a very illumination conversation with a personal chef the other day. I asked him for a report on how you were doing. Good with the baby but otherwise an obnoxious asshole he said.”  She fondly stroked Lili’s hair. 

 

Lili lowered her eyes.  The touch was reassuring, but Asha’s tone held neither praise nor recrimination, so she didn’t know how Asha felt about that report.  Probably exasperated and amused. How could she convince wily Asha to help her? She wanted to kick herself. She was of no use to Cameron. The only reason she’d gotten to be his babysitter was because of Asha pulling strings.  Maybe she deserved to be regressed with Cameron.  They could be a diaper shitting duo. She snorted at the thought. She certainly was failing at handling this in an adult manner.

 

“Beatrice made a sizeable donation to the head doctor of a regression hospital with the promise of more donations if they took her grandson under the premise that he’d relapsed and needed more intense treatment. The paperwork is all in order.”

 

Lili sucked in a sharp breath.  Her heart constricted. “S-so...so you’re saying we-I’m- too late?”  Her brain shut off. She didn’t know what to do. Yes, she did- if all else failed, she’d take Cameron and run, consequences be damned. She’d never give in. 

 

Asha grinned, a flash of white teeth.  “Naturally, that’s why you blundered in here to ask me for help.”  She waited for Lili to cautiously nod her head. 

 

“You couldn’t even get the babysitting job because of your reputation. Though I do admire your determination on that one. You did give it the old college try though.”

 

Lili winced, lowering her head in shame. 

 

“Don’t beat yourself over it, child.”  Asha patted the top of her head as if Lili was still a little girl. 

 

Lili chewed her bottom lip.  This didn’t feel like a dismissal. Minutes ticked by. She shifted on the bed, anxiety gnawing at her.  She imagined the crinkle of Cameron’s diaper in her ears.  She couldn’t live without him.  He was her air, her sunshine. Asha stayed silent until Lili couldn’t take the pressure anymore. Her head flew up, eyes wild in desperation. “Well, will you? Help? Please?”

 

“There’s not much to do. He’s not family. It’s none of our business.”

 

“He’s my family! I love him! I won’t accept this. He needs me. There has to be something. Anything. He’s gotta have some rights. A lawyer to fight back. What if- he wants to be a big boy. An adult. We can get a lawyer to fight for him, so he can get his independence back.”  Her chest heaved with turbulent emotions, adrenaline pumping along with her chaotic thoughts. She leapt to her feet, towering over Asha.  “He can come back to India with us.”

 

Ever unflappable, Asha reclined calmly, oblivious to Liliana’s inferno.  “That’s certainly a better solution that running away.  For now, we can do nothing. This is Cameron’s choice.”

 

“He’s made his choice! He’ll fight!”

 

“Will he?  We’ll see.”  

 

Lili heard the dismissal in Asha’s voice. She’d be getting no help from her. Fine. She’d go straight to Grandpa Jack.  “Screw you.”  She snarled in Hindi as she spun on her heel and slammed the door shut behind her so hard a decorative wall plate fell to the floor and shattered. 

 

Asha eyed the mess, shaking her head in disappointment. “Oh, Lili. I love you, but you are a very stupid girl sometimes.”

[Pacifiers]

I have 2 pacifiers, a pink one and a purple one. I use them sometimes. The pink one is a size six and the purple one is a size 10. 

[Bland Christmas Dinner]

[Merry Christmas]

[2 years potty untraining - 30+ years with double incontience! How do feel about this?]

There's a lot of great guides on here from people who have diaper-trained themselves. A lot of it seems to be mental- like thinking of yourself as already diaper-dependent. And consistency and just getting used to it. There's also a thread about a person who got incontinence surgery from a doctor in Mexico. A lot of great resources on this sight.  

[Music makes the season]

There are some Christmas songs I really like. Music and shows/ movies can really set the tone for the season. December 5 I like watching videos of Krampus Night in Germany. My accomplishment this Christmas was finally finishing my Christmas story I've been working on for several years. I really enjoyed writing it, but It's also nice to wrap up a tale.  

I've got 2 Christmas presents left to buy for family/ friends and then I have to wrap everything because if it wasn't for the last minute I'd never get anything done. 🤣 I have some cookies to bake but I'm not baking much this year since I'm on a diet. Maybe then it'll start feeling like Christmas for me. This year has been kind of meh. I haven't really been feeling the holiday spirit. 

[Bah Humbug]

Yikes. And so close to Christmas too. I'm so sorry.  That really, really sucks. I hope you can find something. Since it's the end of year and Christmas time, maybe some major appliance stores will be having sales or discounts to move merchandise? I hope they offer payment plans or something to make it more affordable. Times are tough. 

[Faking incontinence to wife]

That's a tough situation. Each person is a unique individual so who knows how they would react. Some spouses might leave while other may stay and tolerate the diaper wearing and using. Even if you go with the incontinence and can pull it off, your wife may still leave you if she feels it is too much for her to deal with etc. trust and communication are important for relationships but sometimes telling the truth can do more damage than good. 

I don't have any solid advice. It's a sticky situation with much to risk. OP you know your wife best. I wish you luck and I hope all goes well for you. 

Would talking with a therapist help? Maybe they could give some educated relationship advice or help you work through this? Maybe they could even help you talk to your wife about it? Maybe couple's counseling or therapy could help? 

[Teddys are back!!!]

Those are cute! They might not be thick enough for night diapers but they look like an adorable daytime diaper! 

[ABU really backed up.]

22 hours ago, Spiderman said:

You know what they say.  Shit happens. 😁

Good thing they're a diaper company. 😂

[Fedex delivery driver]

Most of my orders come from Amazon. Some delivery drivers are great. I appreciate their hard work and actually putting packages on the porch. Others....I don't know how they passed a job interview and I wonder what the hiring criteria was because they're absolute shit at their job. Why put the box on the porch when you can just chuck it into the yard or drop it on the sidewalk? I've complained when this happens. Not trying to be a Karen but that's a good way for things to get broken and since they're closer to the curb easier to get stolen. 

[Is this a real diaper?]

3 hours ago, DprDJeff said:

Absolutely AI. Eventually AI will create indistinguishable images, but not this day. lol

Good catch! I wouldn't have noticed it. 

I do like the diaper design. Don't know how well it would function if made in the real world though. It would be nice if it came in a variety of colors too! 

AI trolled us. 😂

[For the Concert goers...]

It's a cute diaper cover, perfect for a metal concert. It's not very functional. I wonder if it's big enough to cover a nice thick absorbent disposable diaper? Or maybe it could cover up a cloth diaper and plastic panties?

Rusty Pins has a good point about wearing clothes over it. Hmm... maybe it would be good for a rock concert held during an ABDL convention, so the crowd would be ABDLs? 🤣

[Not a problem for me.]

Diapers for the win! 😁

[Found on Youtube]

Looks more like an adult incontinence brief to me.  

Or it's a big "baby" diaper. 😂😉

[ABU really backed up.]

The title sounds like ABU needs a laxative or a suppository. 🤣

It sucks their shipping is delayed (but that happens sometimes to many companies), but it's nice they emailed notifications to their customers. 

[Scents from Baby products no longer available]

Love's Baby Soft is still around. Maybe they changed the scent from how it originally smelled? I havne't used it in years, but I remember it. I liked it as a pre-teen/ tween. It was my first perfume. There's a few different forms of the original pink scent- perfume, body spray, roll-on. My favorite of the Baby Soft line was Love's Soft Jasmine. Amazon even has a Love's Baby Soft gift set- a small perfume, shower gel, and lotion. 

My favorite baby scent is lavender. I like to use lavender cornstarch baby powder during diaper changes.

[Diaper story experiences IRL.]

If that happened in a Diaper Dimension story, an Amazon would come along, scoop you up, diaper you, and make you their baby. 😆

[Christmas shopping time.]

Winter is a great time for wearing thick absorbent diapers. They're easier to hide under winter clothing. 😁

If winter and fall are incontinence season, is spring potty training time? I'd probably flunk out and just be diapered 24/7 365. Or 366 during a leap year. 

[How many?]

Hmm...unlimited money + privacy?  I'd buy a house. A big house and turn a room or two into a private nursery. 

I'd definitely get more ABDL diapers. Mostly ABDL diapers.  I wear either solid colors diapers like Megamax or Sunkiss Masterpiece in pink from Amazon because those diapers are much easier to explain than big baby prints. 

I'd buy a case of each: 

I love a lot of the LIttle For Big diapers:

• Little Circus
• Little Dreamers
• Little Blue Babyfur
• Potty Pants
• Baby Parade
• Blushing Baby
• Vintage Baby
• Little Trunks
• Nursery Blue & Pink
• and one of my top favorite diapers, Little Fantasy

Tykables

• Unicorn
• Overnights
• Tinimals

ABU

• Peekabu
• Little Pawz
• Little Kings
• Alphagatorz
• I really, really miss their discontinued Kiddo diapers with the adorable owls and stars on them.

Rearz

• Daydreamer
• Critter Caboose
• Safari
• Lil Monsters
• Barnyard
• Alpaca
• Mermaid Tales

[A Naughty Christmas COMPLETE 12-5-24]

On 12/4/2024 at 8:27 PM, BabySofia said:

I'll have to re-read  the whole thing in a couple weeks when I get some downtime. Congratulations on finishing this, I know it's been a project over years! 

Thank you for commenting! I'm looking forward to some holiday downtime off work but somehow the holidays always seem busier and they go by so fast I never get most of my plans done lol. I love finishing a story, especially a long one. But in a way it's a little sad saying goodbye to writing the characters, etc. But that's what sequels are for! 😁

[Content Creation & Monetization - ABDL Research Presentation!]

The only commission I've done is a free one for a friend. 

The advice about a paypal business acount is great. I didn't know about that. If I ever do commissions for money I'll definitely keep that in mind!

When I had more time to write consistently, I had a patreon.  As life and my schedule changed, I switched to Amazon since it gives me more flexibility with uploading. And readers get to sit down and read a story in one whole sitting. (Honestly I'm not sure if readers in general have a preference. As a reader myself, I like to read a story in chunks or chapter by chapter. But sometimes it is also nice to sit down and read a story in one go. Or I can take breaks and come back to a whole completed story whenever.)