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The tension is coming. It's inevitable because fictional me cannot escape or defeat the antagonist of the story: her own regression. The pacing is admittedly slow, but you have to let the poor girl enjoy some softness before being thrown back onto the jagged rocks. Remember, she's one day removed from beong disowned and punching a guy in the eye. Trust me, her trials aren't over.
Also, Nancy isn't fictional me's mommy. She's a Caregiver, huge difference. Likewise, Leon's not done either, he's got some important appearances to make, but he's not going to be at the registration office. He can't adopt a Little for another 7 years, so he's not in a position to help fictional me. Leon may want to adopt her, but they both know it can't happen. He will have to find another way to be included in her life.
There are a lot of female ABs. They don't often put their heads above the parapet on most social media for the reasons already covered on this thread. When events are set up in the right way then plenty turn up. And no, they're not generally looking for a male AB to look after. The events I go to here in the UK are about 50/50 male and female. Non-sexual, carefully curated and successful. If a bit noisy at times!!