First Time Playing With Your Non-ab/dl Spouse

[BabyLex]

So it was this past December, I told my spouse about my AB side. I took a deep breath, opened with the quintessential line of "There's something I should tell you..." and laid it all out on the line. Yeap, explained my interest in diapers, acting like a little baby... and... well, if anyone knows what I'm talking about it, it's you guys. You know the scene with all it's quirks, nuances, subtleties, and variations. Anyways, without delving deep into details and labels, my own particular leanings are on the AB side.

"December? Come on man, it's been like five months since you came out, and you only played together recently? What gives?" I hear you cry. And it's a good question. I mean with all the AB/DL stories I've read, I was led to believe that my 'coming out' (as it were) would have resulted in my partner immediately being completely into the idea, jumping into a caregiving role, and putting me in diapers 24/7 so I'd be permanently regressed to my AB role, and live happily ever after. Hmm... maybe I didn't say the right things when I came out... or maybe I am just with the wrong partner... or maybe, just maybe reality is written in a different pen than fiction. (Typically a more permanent one.).

"Yeah, but still, I mean five months, before you played together. It had to be on both your minds since the moment you came out... I mean, like, how could it not be?".

You're a persistent little inquisitor aren't you? But, you're right, it was on both our minds, and perhaps by some measures it was a long time. But, certain things require paradigm shifting to new models that can incorporate new rapport. Think of it like this. Say you and your partner want to build a house, and you know from the get-go that your house needs to house a grand piano so you can pursue your passion for playing piano. So what do you do? You tell your partner, "Its important to me to have a place in our home for a grand piano." and then you and your partner will plan, develop and build your home around your passion for music and this object. This is an example of being forthright about your needs and allowing the partnership to adapt to these initial needs. But, let's hypothesize that you didn't tell your partner your need for a piano and your passion for music. Let's instead say you lied awake at night sometimes thinking about playing music on a grand piano and secretly played with one when no one was looking, and finally got to a point where you just couldn't hold it inside anymore and confessed "I've had this secret interest and passion for a long time, and now I want to put a piano in our home.". Let's also say you have a loving, open minded and supportive partner. They'll likely want to know more about this side of you, and will ask questions, try to figure out both what your passion is, as well as why you concealed it for long. You'll go through the phase of discussing what pleasures you derive from your activity, what you love about it, how your partner can be involved (or not) and be supportive of that which makes you happy. But, the bottom line is, you want to modify your mutual home by bringing a big new thing into it. You could a) slap the new piano in the middle of the room with everything else sort of awkwardly pushed aside for this new object OR you could take a more organic approach and figure out how to integrate the piano into the flow of the home. Feng Shui so to speak. Which solution do you think is going to work better in the long term? ;-)

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Still sounds like you're making excuses for being shy about your interest in role playing as a baby, and not actually DOING it, after you said you wanted to."

Ooooo, that hits home. Okay, fine, so it's true! So I am shy about it. Come on, though, look at the circumstances. We'd been together for several years, developed a relationship around specific symmetries, asymmetries, love, trust, compassion, loyalty, kindnesses, etc, and generally the concept of being (relatively) intelligently, free-thinking, independent adults. I mean, we developed a sense of trust, where it seems natural and right to assume I wasn't holding anything back, even when I was. I'm kind of ashamed of that... I didn't have the courage to talk about my AB side. Am I embaressed on some level to admit that I like role playing as a baby, wearing diapers, using them, and all the details which that implies? Well... yeah. I enjoy talking on these forums, and with you all, because it's safe. And yeah I'm kind of scared of those who don't 'get it' finding out. On a practical level it could affect the kind of employment I could get, or be misinterpreted by legal authorities (something we all should be careful and aware of), but all practicality aside, I just don't have that sense of 'baby pride' yet. I don't have the "Yeah, so I like pretend I'm a baby, and I enjoy diapers. So what of it? You got a problem that?" attitude.

"Okay, so you're shy, and you're not ready to go tell the world about your AB interest, but think about it: This is your lover, someone you've been with for a long time, that you've already told about your AB side, and they were okay with it right? So, like, when you came out, why didn't you just go get all diapered/geared up, and say 'Hey check out 'BabyLex.'. What's the worst that could have happened?"

Well, I think the worst thing that could have happened would be that I'd have just loudly proclaimed that I wanted to radically alter the solid relationship we had. I'd have proclaimed that the 'real me' was someone else, and our relationship was a farce based on me pretending I was someone I wasn't, that my partner had come to love and trust the person I was pretending to be, versus the person I am. My partner would have felt that I'd been living lies in order to come to THIS day, where I'd show my 'true' colors and what I 'really' wanted. But, it's a gradient... the best case scenario would have been that my partner would have said "Yeah... I kinda suspected you had some interest in being an AB/DL, in fact I'm really glad you finally told me, because now that it's out in the open, we can play with it." Or the response could have been somewhere in the middle ranging from supportive and interested, supportive and ambivalent, supportive and apathetic, supportive but disinterested, or unsupportive altogether.

"Yeah, but that didn't happen, you got a positive response... and you sure really are stalling when it comes to telling us about what your first playtime was like. So enough background, come on, get to the good stuff."

Okay, okay, okay. And by the way, you're the one who asked about why it took so long . So, over the course of our conversations about my baby side, (since I came out) my partner expressed interest in one day seeing me play, and possibly joining in. It was a far cry from "Dude, you should totally, let me change your diapers, feed you, and treat you like my little baby. I would love that, it would be completely awesome." It was more like "Well, I don't know what it would be like to play with you while you're pretending to be two, but I'd like to find out.". But, hey, it was interest... so I figured I'd take it. So while my partner was out on a bike ride on Saturday morning, I slipped into my baby role. Got on an abena x-plus (all creamed and powdered, etc), plastic pants, my onezie, filled all my baby bottles, got my stuffed animals out, got my nuk5 in my mouth, and plopped myself in front of a Care Bears movie. I just waited. I knew that eventually I'd be found watching my movie, and at that point, things could go any direction. I could get a quick look of "OMG, that's a little too strange for me." and be left alone to enjoy my baby time by myself, I could get "Awww, aren't you the cutest little guy." and have company or anything in between. Things worked out beautifully. We hung out and watched the Care Bears movie together for a couple hours, then tickled each other, rolled around on the floor, played silly peek-a-boo kind of games, and I'd share my baby bottles of apple juice. Eventually, I was tucked in for a nap, during which I went from being a slightly damp, to a thoroughly soaked little guy. As per my standard clean up ritual, I woke up from my nap (all of an hour of it), crawled into the bathroom, took off my soaked abena (which was falling off anyways) and climbed into a big bubble bath. When I finished my bath, I donned my street clothes (all adult like) and went about my day. That was about it. Great time.

"Hey, thanks for sharing. So what would you tell someone who was looking to play (as an AB/DL), for the first time, with someone they've known for a long time who isn't (yet) into AB/DL stuff? Like a really good friend or a lover."

Well, we all come from different backgrounds, but if someone is willing to play with you, and explore your interest in being an AB/DL, they obviously care about you.

* Don't expect too much, and don't let the fantasy stories about people who come out as an AB/DL and immediately have all their deepest secret desires come to fruition give you high hopes. Those stories are fiction. Set small achievable goals for playtime. Even something as simple as playing together for a few hours while you act in a certain way. Or if you talked about it beforehand, something as small and simple as a diaper change, or bath time, or something measurable and achievable. But don't expect them to be a mindreader and to know exactly how to play with you.

* Be empathetic and realize that this person is trying something they likely haven't considered or thought much about, and have zero experience with. Look for signs that things aren't working for them, and then try something else. Even though you're the one in diapers playing with a different side of yourself, your non-AB/DL friend is also a person who has likes/dislikes too. Keep their limits and comfort levels in mind as well.

* Be patient, be calm, and be proactive. Give clues, signals, and sometimes just outright verbal messages (even if they're in baby talk ;-)) about what you want, enjoy, and would make the experience go well for you.

* Go slowly. Be willing to take things a step at a time. Start with things that are most similar to regular, adult kind of things. Watching cartoons/movies, reading (kids) books, bubble baths, etc. These aren't challenging activities that may help your non-AB/DL companion acclimate to your mentality and your AB/DL personality.

* Celebrate the successes. Find things they like as well as the things you like. Hopefully you'll find some great overlap to work into part of a regular routine.

* Talk about it afterwards. Let some time pass, so you can both reflect on things, and talk dispassionately about what happened, what worked, what didn't, what you want to try next, what you could do to make things that didn't work, actually work, discuss their ideas, thoughts and feelings about their level of involvement, as well as your own.

* Say 'Thank you'. Seems simple enough, but it's amazing how many people neglect to express appreciation of the other person's efforts. Your non-AB/DL friend just stretched themselves in an interesting and new ways, that they never have before, because they care about you, so tell them you appreciate it. It'll mean a lot to them, and will (hopefully) encourage them to do it with you again.

"Seems basic enough. Thanks for sharing your experience, that's how we become a better and stronger community, you know. We talk about what we did, how our experiences worked out, and offer tips and tricks to each other. It's also great when people talk about their positive experiences and when things go well (as well as when they don't). It's encouraging and gives us hope that we'll get to grow our AB/DL sides"

No problem, glad to help out. Well, I gotta get back to the lil'skool desk and get back to work.

A multiple personalitied post by,

--Lex (and some of the little voices in his head)

[lynniehyde]

So it was this past December, I told my spouse about my AB side. I took a deep breath, opened with the quintessential line of "There's something I should tell you..." and laid it all out on the line. Yeap, explained my interest in diapers, acting like a little baby... and... well, if anyone knows what I'm talking about it, it's you guys. You know the scene with all it's quirks, nuances, subtleties, and variations. Anyways, without delving deep into details and labels, my own particular leanings are on the AB side.

"December? Come on man, it's been like five months since you came out, and you only played together recently? What gives?" I hear you cry. And it's a good question. I mean with all the AB/DL stories I've read, I was led to believe that my 'coming out' (as it were) would have resulted in my partner immediately being completely into the idea, jumping into a caregiving role, and putting me in diapers 24/7 so I'd be permanently regressed to my AB role, and live happily ever after. Hmm... maybe I didn't say the right things when I came out... or maybe I am just with the wrong partner... or maybe, just maybe reality is written in a different pen than fiction. (Typically a more permanent one.).

"Yeah, but still, I mean five months, before you played together. It had to be on both your minds since the moment you came out... I mean, like, how could it not be?".

You're a persistent little inquisitor aren't you? But, you're right, it was on both our minds, and perhaps by some measures it was a long time. But, certain things require paradigm shifting to new models that can incorporate new rapport. Think of it like this. Say you and your partner want to build a house, and you know from the get-go that your house needs to house a grand piano so you can pursue your passion for playing piano. So what do you do? You tell your partner, "Its important to me to have a place in our home for a grand piano." and then you and your partner will plan, develop and build your home around your passion for music and this object. This is an example of being forthright about your needs and allowing the partnership to adapt to these initial needs. But, let's hypothesize that you didn't tell your partner your need for a piano and your passion for music. Let's instead say you lied awake at night sometimes thinking about playing music on a grand piano and secretly played with one when no one was looking, and finally got to a point where you just couldn't hold it inside anymore and confessed "I've had this secret interest and passion for a long time, and now I want to put a piano in our home.". Let's also say you have a loving, open minded and supportive partner. They'll likely want to know more about this side of you, and will ask questions, try to figure out both what your passion is, as well as why you concealed it for long. You'll go through the phase of discussing what pleasures you derive from your activity, what you love about it, how your partner can be involved (or not) and be supportive of that which makes you happy. But, the bottom line is, you want to modify your mutual home by bringing a big new thing into it. You could a) slap the new piano in the middle of the room with everything else sort of awkwardly pushed aside for this new object OR you could take a more organic approach and figure out how to integrate the piano into the flow of the home. Feng Shui so to speak. Which solution do you think is going to work better in the long term? ;-)

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Still sounds like you're making excuses for being shy about your interest in role playing as a baby, and not actually DOING it, after you said you wanted to."

Ooooo, that hits home. Okay, fine, so it's true! So I am shy about it. Come on, though, look at the circumstances. We'd been together for several years, developed a relationship around specific symmetries, asymmetries, love, trust, compassion, loyalty, kindnesses, etc, and generally the concept of being (relatively) intelligently, free-thinking, independent adults. I mean, we developed a sense of trust, where it seems natural and right to assume I wasn't holding anything back, even when I was. I'm kind of ashamed of that... I didn't have the courage to talk about my AB side. Am I embaressed on some level to admit that I like role playing as a baby, wearing diapers, using them, and all the details which that implies? Well... yeah. I enjoy talking on these forums, and with you all, because it's safe. And yeah I'm kind of scared of those who don't 'get it' finding out. On a practical level it could affect the kind of employment I could get, or be misinterpreted by legal authorities (something we all should be careful and aware of), but all practicality aside, I just don't have that sense of 'baby pride' yet. I don't have the "Yeah, so I like pretend I'm a baby, and I enjoy diapers. So what of it? You got a problem that?" attitude.

"Okay, so you're shy, and you're not ready to go tell the world about your AB interest, but think about it: This is your lover, someone you've been with for a long time, that you've already told about your AB side, and they were okay with it right? So, like, when you came out, why didn't you just go get all diapered/geared up, and say 'Hey check out 'BabyLex.'. What's the worst that could have happened?"

Well, I think the worst thing that could have happened would be that I'd have just loudly proclaimed that I wanted to radically alter the solid relationship we had. I'd have proclaimed that the 'real me' was someone else, and our relationship was a farce based on me pretending I was someone I wasn't, that my partner had come to love and trust the person I was pretending to be, versus the person I am. My partner would have felt that I'd been living lies in order to come to THIS day, where I'd show my 'true' colors and what I 'really' wanted. But, it's a gradient... the best case scenario would have been that my partner would have said "Yeah... I kinda suspected you had some interest in being an AB/DL, in fact I'm really glad you finally told me, because now that it's out in the open, we can play with it." Or the response could have been somewhere in the middle ranging from supportive and interested, supportive and ambivalent, supportive and apathetic, supportive but disinterested, or unsupportive altogether.

"Yeah, but that didn't happen, you got a positive response... and you sure really are stalling when it comes to telling us about what your first playtime was like. So enough background, come on, get to the good stuff."

Okay, okay, okay. And by the way, you're the one who asked about why it took so long . So, over the course of our conversations about my baby side, (since I came out) my partner expressed interest in one day seeing me play, and possibly joining in. It was a far cry from "Dude, you should totally, let me change your diapers, feed you, and treat you like my little baby. I would love that, it would be completely awesome." It was more like "Well, I don't know what it would be like to play with you while you're pretending to be two, but I'd like to find out.". But, hey, it was interest... so I figured I'd take it. So while my partner was out on a bike ride on Saturday morning, I slipped into my baby role. Got on an abena x-plus (all creamed and powdered, etc), plastic pants, my onezie, filled all my baby bottles, got my stuffed animals out, got my nuk5 in my mouth, and plopped myself in front of a Care Bears movie. I just waited. I knew that eventually I'd be found watching my movie, and at that point, things could go any direction. I could get a quick look of "OMG, that's a little too strange for me." and be left alone to enjoy my baby time by myself, I could get "Awww, aren't you the cutest little guy." and have company or anything in between. Things worked out beautifully. We hung out and watched the Care Bears movie together for a couple hours, then tickled each other, rolled around on the floor, played silly peek-a-boo kind of games, and I'd share my baby bottles of apple juice. Eventually, I was tucked in for a nap, during which I went from being a slightly damp, to a thoroughly soaked little guy. As per my standard clean up ritual, I woke up from my nap (all of an hour of it), crawled into the bathroom, took off my soaked abena (which was falling off anyways) and climbed into a big bubble bath. When I finished my bath, I donned my street clothes (all adult like) and went about my day. That was about it. Great time.

"Hey, thanks for sharing. So what would you tell someone who was looking to play (as an AB/DL), for the first time, with someone they've known for a long time who isn't (yet) into AB/DL stuff? Like a really good friend or a lover."

Well, we all come from different backgrounds, but if someone is willing to play with you, and explore your interest in being an AB/DL, they obviously care about you.

* Don't expect too much, and don't let the fantasy stories about people who come out as an AB/DL and immediately have all their deepest secret desires come to fruition give you high hopes. Those stories are fiction. Set small achievable goals for playtime. Even something as simple as playing together for a few hours while you act in a certain way. Or if you talked about it beforehand, something as small and simple as a diaper change, or bath time, or something measurable and achievable. But don't expect them to be a mindreader and to know exactly how to play with you.

* Be empathetic and realize that this person is trying something they likely haven't considered or thought much about, and have zero experience with. Look for signs that things aren't working for them, and then try something else. Even though you're the one in diapers playing with a different side of yourself, your non-AB/DL friend is also a person who has likes/dislikes too. Keep their limits and comfort levels in mind as well.

* Be patient, be calm, and be proactive. Give clues, signals, and sometimes just outright verbal messages (even if they're in baby talk ;-)) about what you want, enjoy, and would make the experience go well for you.

* Go slowly. Be willing to take things a step at a time. Start with things that are most similar to regular, adult kind of things. Watching cartoons/movies, reading (kids) books, bubble baths, etc. These aren't challenging activities that may help your non-AB/DL companion acclimate to your mentality and your AB/DL personality.

* Celebrate the successes. Find things they like as well as the things you like. Hopefully you'll find some great overlap to work into part of a regular routine.

* Talk about it afterwards. Let some time pass, so you can both reflect on things, and talk dispassionately about what happened, what worked, what didn't, what you want to try next, what you could do to make things that didn't work, actually work, discuss their ideas, thoughts and feelings about their level of involvement, as well as your own.

* Say 'Thank you'. Seems simple enough, but it's amazing how many people neglect to express appreciation of the other person's efforts. Your non-AB/DL friend just stretched themselves in an interesting and new ways, that they never have before, because they care about you, so tell them you appreciate it. It'll mean a lot to them, and will (hopefully) encourage them to do it with you again.

"Seems basic enough. Thanks for sharing your experience, that's how we become a better and stronger community, you know. We talk about what we did, how our experiences worked out, and offer tips and tricks to each other. It's also great when people talk about their positive experiences and when things go well (as well as when they don't). It's encouraging and gives us hope that we'll get to grow our AB/DL sides"

No problem, glad to help out. Well, I gotta get back to the lil'skool desk and get back to work.

A multiple personalitied post by,

--Lex (and some of the little voices in his head)

Great post, as always, Lex. And, as always, a bit lengthy. I think it's great you had the courage to take that "leap of faith" it takes to let your SO in on your innermost desires. It can only help but strengthen your relationship. It's all about trust and honesty. And, love.

Cuddles,

--heidilynn

PS: I have an image in my mind of you fitting into that li'l skooldesk. LMAO!

[BriGuy]

Well put Lex. It seems the coming out part is the easiest after you do it eh? i agree, its day by day, conversation by conversation. Rome wasn't built in a day!

~Brian

[BabyLex]

Great post, as always, Lex. And, as always, a bit lengthy. I think it's great you had the courage to take that "leap of faith" it takes to let your SO in on your innermost desires. It can only help but strengthen your relationship. It's all about trust and honesty. And, love.

I have an image in my mind of you fitting into that li'l skooldesk. LMAO!

Lynniehyde,

<smiles> What can I say, I love to write ;-)

Thanks for the positive encouragement, it's greatly appreciated. Hehe, the little skooldesk, sadly has a bunch of computers and tax information on it. The more I think about 'the adult store', the more I think it should sell, well, 'adult' things. Y'know like briefcases, insurance, ties, suits, desktop organizers, PDAs, and those sorts of things. They wouldn't let that stuff within a few feet of a 'kids store'. ;-)

Thanks again for your response. :-)

--Lex

[BabyLex]

Well put Lex. It seems the coming out part is the easiest after you do it eh? i agree, its day by day, conversation by conversation. Rome wasn't built in a day!

~Brian

Brian,

Thanks :-) Yeah, it does seem that coming out is always easiest after you do, and the precipice of the end of the world until you do, and the most powerful emotional experience one can have when actually doing it. (Thanks for the all Canadian "eh" at the end too ;-), I love it!)

You're right on with your comment that it's a day by day, conversation by conversation thing. :-)

--Lex

[diaperwearntigger]

So not knowing you, and only reading the post... I have a question..... Were you into the scene before you got married? or did you get involved after you go married?

I'm glad it worked well for you and your SO. I have heard so many stories that it didn't go well for those who did finally tell their SO.... I guess the thing I always wondered is, if you told your SO before you got married maybe their reaction would be a little bit better. I would just feel that my SO was hiding this from me, not being honest with me, and then wonder what else they haven't told me....

However, I'm glad it went well for you. I hope you get to play again sometime again soon!

[adriansurley]

Good Lord you took some time to write that out.

[BabyLex]

So not knowing you, and only reading the post... I have a question..... Were you into the scene before you got married? or did you get involved after you go married?

I'm glad it worked well for you and your SO. I have heard so many stories that it didn't go well for those who did finally tell their SO.... I guess the thing I always wondered is, if you told your SO before you got married maybe their reaction would be a little bit better. I would just feel that my SO was hiding this from me, not being honest with me, and then wonder what else they haven't told me....

However, I'm glad it went well for you. I hope you get to play again sometime again soon!

Tigger,

Excellent question. I've known about my AB side since I was 12, so to answer to your question is: Yes. I knew about my own AB tendencies before we got married. (As to "the scene", I've never played with anyone else, save this one time with my spouse, for a variety of reasons including the concerns revolving around trust and loyalty that you've addressed) However, there is a caveat to my answer. My AB interests have always been cyclical, that is to say that I was semi-active as an AB during my teenage years (I'd play once every few weeks with homemade diapers when no one else was around), only played as an AB a few times while in college/university, and maybe a few times a year since my partner and I have been together. But in the past year or so, my interests in my baby-self were growing. My historically infrequent tendencies had blossomed into a larger focus in my life, and that's what prompted my coming out to my SO. Was I hiding an interest from my lover for a number of years? Yeah, I was. Did the fact that I didn't reveal those interests earlier cause harm or damage to our relationship? No, it didn't, and we talked about the concerns you brought up. Given that all relationships are uniquely defined by their constituent members, the same actions may have drastically different interpretations and thus results.

Thanks for the encouragement and the excellent questions revolving around honesty. You're a good one ;-)

--Lex

[lynniehyde]

So not knowing you, and only reading the post... I have a question..... Were you into the scene before you got married? or did you get involved after you go married?

My guess is, Lex was into this well before the relationship started. It's much scarier to reveal these feelings to someone, when your relationship gets more involved. Better to be up front when the relationship looks like it might be something to pursue. Separates the "wheat from the chaff", so to speak. You'll find out early, whether or not it will work out. The results of your confession may break your heart. But, it also carries the possibilty of making a strong, loving union.

Cuddles,

--heidilynn

[BabyLex]

My guess is, Lex was into this well before the relationship started. It's much scarier to reveal these feelings to someone, when your relationship gets more involved. Better to be up front when the relationship looks like it might be something to pursue. Separates the "wheat from the chaff", so to speak. You'll find out early, whether or not it will work out. The results of your confession may break your heart. But, it also carries the possibilty of making a strong, loving union.

Cuddles,

--heidilynn

Heidilynn,

<smiles> Right you are! I knew I was an AB prior to engaging in our relationship.

Well spoken wisdom regarding revealing one's esoteric interests early as a true test to separate those true companions you can count on in the long term, and those who would eventually leave anyways.

On the flip side, we're multifaceted crystals with thousands/million different aspects to ourselves. Our facets can grow, shrink, and change color over time. Some of our facets aren't overly interesting or even relevant. If we're living in the middle of a dense urban environment our background desire to someday plant a garden isn't applicable to the current conditions. However, if we start talking about moving out of the city OR our interest in planting a garden grows to become a larger part of our identity, it goes from an irrelevant detail to a relevant facet, and perhaps even a central focus. A part of honesty is communicating how, when, and in what way your facets change. And, as you said, when starting a relationship, it's best to give potential partners the best description of what you know about which facets of your identity are the most important ;-)

Thanks for the wise (and intuitive) response ;-)

--Lex

[BriGuy]

Brian,

Thanks :-) Yeah, it does seem that coming out is always easiest after you do, and the precipice of the end of the world until you do, and the most powerful emotional experience one can have when actually doing it. (Thanks for the all Canadian "eh" at the end too ;-), I love it!)

You're right on with your comment that it's a day by day, conversation by conversation thing. :-)

--Lex

Not to mention the ability to sleep like a baby knowing that someone accepts this and the world didn't end upon mentioning, "i like to wear diapers." Haha I didn't even catch the "Canadian Eh" Thats some funny stuff right there. I think I may move to Canada, things here in the US are looking rather bleak.

~Brian

[BabyLex]

Not to mention the ability to sleep like a baby knowing that someone accepts this and the world didn't end upon mentioning, "i like to wear diapers." Haha I didn't even catch the "Canadian Eh" Thats some funny stuff right there. I think I may move to Canada, things here in the US are looking rather bleak.

~Brian

Brian,

You hit the nail on the head with that one! The ability to sleep like, and as, a baby is one of the greatest pleasures a person can experience (at any age ;-), and hence the cliche. The coming out part is always easiest for other people (mostly those who have done it) because their circumstances are not your own, and post hoc ergo propter hoc easier. Although, realistically, we all have own dramas, demons, and troubles to face when we come out, and the road leading up to it is where the story lies.

<smiles> I'm one of them Canadamerican, who moved from one West Coast North American City to another... but this one is nicely north of the border ;-) I highly recommend making the move. http://www.cic.gc.ca :-)

--Lex

[steal_viper]

BabyLex, thank you for your story. Two days ago I told my girlfriend about my medical reasons for wearing diapers when I was in my pre-teen to early teen years and she took it well. She said it didn’t matter what my past was, she loved me just the same, and more so now that I was able to confide in her. This leads me to believe that I can have another talk with her about how I began to enjoy wearing diapers for the reasons of stress relief, comfort and security.

I am really not looking for her to wear diapers with me or change me or anything like that, all I want is to not have to hide the websites I look at and the stories I read. I would love to be able to wear a diaper around her but I will take it one day at a time. I’m glad everything worked out for you and I hope that your next play time session is as good as or better than the last.

JD

[BabyLex]

I am really not looking for her to wear diapers with me or change me or anything like that, all I want is to not have to hide the websites I look at and the stories I read. I would love to be able to wear a diaper around her but I will take it one day at a time. I’m glad everything worked out for you and I hope that your next play time session is as good as or better than the last.

JD

JD,

Glad to hear you're being open and honest with your girlfriend. I understand those timid baby steps you have to take at first in order to sum the courage to share that part of your life with someone. It's not easy, that's for sure. But 'good on yea', keep up the good work and keep us posted ;-)

I think you have a rational and sane attitude towards reasonable desires and expectations. Instead of dreaming up something far detached from the current reality, you're looking for small and subtle changes in your otherwise highly functional relationship. I have a feeling things will work out fine. If nothing else, feel free to just say that you 'chat online with others like yourself'. You don't have to list URLs, screen names or anything like that, but just say that these are things you do. As to wearing diapers around the house... well, nothing wrong with introducing that topic when the time is right. You seem on top of things though, I bet it goes well and smoothly :-)

--Lex