attempt at humor <Pipeline Failure!> Eternal Child (Prequel) (Rewriting) (Chapter 2 Done)

[TBCuri]

Hello All, Controversy on this story's origin. 🤔

Anyway, Just checked in to drop this tag label:

<Main: Human  🤝 Tool: AI>

<Pipeline: Human: Writes --> AI: Refines & Expands --> Human: Rewrites & Refines>

<Pipeline Failure! -> Human Rewrite: Failure! Too Inexperienced --> Human Deduction: Story too fast-paced! Character development: Redundant! Generic!>

<Suggestion: Slow Burn Forge! -> Construct the Bones! --> Build the Flesh! --> Infuse the Human Soul!>

Thanks and Good luck All. 🙂

...

 

Prologue: The Mysterious Announcement... Or not

The whole place smelled like stale air and regret.

I was stuck in a boiling hot school auditorium, wedged between a hundred equally miserable students. Above us, the ceiling fans whirred uselessly, doing little more than rearranging the muggy air. Sunlight streamed through the high windows, illuminating the dust motes dancing in the dim glow like tiny, bored ghosts.

All this for a glorified sales pitch. A week ago, "Eternal Child Week" didn't exist. Now, it was a mandatory assembly. The government had dropped it on us like some bizarre, last-ditch effort to make people feel excited, peppering news reports with vague phrases like "limitless potential" and "the dawn of a new era." It sounded less like a holiday and more like a distraction, one of those fake "historic moments" that ends up meaning nothing.

---

Liana, my best friend, was sprawled out in the creaking wooden chair beside me like a cat who had given up on life. She’d mastered the art of maximum limb sprawl, her legs stretched so far they were a public hazard.

"If this turns into one of those ‘Embrace the Future' speeches,” she muttered, "I'm out."

I didn't take my eyes off the stage. "Out how? You gonna just... walk out?”

"Damn right.” She flicked her dark curls over her shoulder with a flourish. "Might even throw in a slow motion exit. Make it iconic."

I sighed, rubbing my temples. “Just try not to get expelled before lunch.”

She grinned. "No promises.”

Before I could warn her to at least pretend to be a functioning student, the auditorium lights dimmed. The low chatter died down as the massive projector screen flickered to life. Static, then the Global News Network logo, followed by the impossibly polished face of a news anchor with a voice as smooth as a ridiculously expensive commercial.

"Citizens of the world," she began, "Today marks the beginning of a historic change. In preparation for the first-ever Eternal Child Week, the government has issued the following statement."

The screen cut to a sterile press room. At the podium stood a government official, he looked like the human embodiment of serious business. His suit was crisp, his hair perfectly combed, his face unreadable. He looked like he was auditioning for the role of 'Emotionless Guy' in a corporate drama.

"As we stand at the dawn of a new era, we must embrace both progress and reflection," he declared, his voice as dry as a PowerPoint presentation. "This week-long observance is not merely a celebration, but a recognition of limitless potential. Further details will be released in the coming days."

And just like that — the screen went black.

Dead silence. Then, a wave of groans swept through the auditorium. Phones lit up like fireflies as students rushed to update their social feeds.

Liana threw her head back so dramatically I thought she might fall out of her chair. "Ugh! That told us NOTHING!"

I leaned forward, resting my chin on my hand. “Exactly. They don't want us to know anything."

At the front, our principal — Such a man, he did look like he regretted every life choice that led him to this moment — cleared his throat into the mic. “Now, I know some of you have questions,” he said, trying way too hard to sound reassuring. “But I encourage you all to keep an open mind."

“Alright. You may return to class," he finished, waving a defeated hand.

---

We pushed through the crowded hallway, dodging slow walkers and last-minute locker stops. But even as I went through the motions, something nagged at me. It wasn't just the lack of answers; it was the lack of questions. Sure, there were jokes and conspiracy theories, but no one seemed genuinely concerned.

That was what unsettled me.

I leaned closer to Liana, keeping my voice low. "There's no merch."

Liana paused from trying to trip a slow-walker. "What?"

"If this was some fun new holiday, there'd be sponsorships," I pressed on. "Maybe T-shirts, Limited-edition soda cans! Or better still..." I made air quotes. "'Celebrate Eternal Child Week with Pepsi!' or some garbage like that. The government never rolls something out without a reason, and the number one reason is always money."

She blinked, tapping her chin. "Okay, yeah. That is kinda weird. Maybe they're just bad at marketing?"

"The government? No way."

Liana leaned against her locker, a smirk playing on her lips. "You are so obsessed with this."

"You once delivered a twenty-minute speech on why the cafeteria needs better snack options."

"And I stand by that," she shot back. "But this is different. You freak out when things don't make sense. It's your default setting." She paused, her eyes widening in mock revelation. "Oh my God," she whispered dramatically. "You're totally one of those noir detectives who narrate everything to themselves."

I stood still.

For a beat, the hallway noise faded away.

Liana's face paled as she realized what had just come out of her mouth.

"Uhh..." she stammered, taking a slight step back.

My expression didn't change.

Except for one thing.

I smiled.

Not my usual, tired, deadpan smirk. This was calm. Too calm. The kind of calm that sent Liana's fight-or-flight instincts into a full-blown panic.

"Liana, girl~" I said sweetly. Too sweetly. “Would you like to repeat that?" My smile didn't waver, but my eye twitched. Just a little.

Her hands immediately shot up in surrender. “Okay, let's not do anything hasty—" she giggled nervously

“Am I too kind to you~?” My eye twitched again.

Liana, for once in her life, shut up.

I let the silence stretch, then turned back to my locker with a sigh. My smile vanished. Liana slumped against the metal, exhaling like she’d just barely escaped with her life.

"Good lord," she muttered, rubbing her arms. “That was terrifying."

I smirked. “Then stop being annoying."

"Impossible."

The bell rang.

"C'mon, let's go," I said, already walking toward class. Liana fell into step beside me.

But the normalcy of it all made my stomach twist. It wasn't just the announcement — it was the reaction. The lack of real concern. People weren't brushing it off because they didn't care. It was something else. A strange, collective acceptance, as if they'd been told to expect it. As if, on some level, they already knew.

A chill crept up my spine.

I was positive I had never heard of Eternal Child Week before today. But if that was true, then why did it feel like I was the only one in the dark?

The shrill sound of the final warning bell yanked me out of my thoughts.

"Whoops, we're gonna be late,” Liana said, speeding up.

I shook off the creeping unease and followed. Maybe I was just looking for a mystery where there wasn't one.

...But something told me that whatever was coming? It wasn't just another holiday.

And deep down, I had a feeling we weren't ready for it.

Edited 8 hours ago by TBCuri
<Pipeline Failure! -> Human Rewrite: Failure! Too Inexperienced --> Human Deduction: Story too fast-paced! Character development: Redundant! Generic!>

[TBCuri]

Chapter 1: Just Another Monday

The first day of the aforementioned Week event began with a–

CRASH!

It was followed by the kind of triumphant scream that could only mean one thing: Jake, her four-year-old brother and resident tiny menace, had already achieved victory over something before 7 AM.

"Jake! What did I just say?!" Mom’s voice, already frayed.

Nina already awake, groaned, stuffing her face into her pillow.

Some people started their mornings with gratitude. Nina started hers with resignation.

By the time she dragged herself to the kitchen, the war zone was in full swing. Mom stood by the counter, pinning Jake with a Mom Stare™ as he demolished his breakfast like a feral animal, cheeks stuffed chipmunk-full while toast crumbs rained down around his already half-spilled juice cup.

"Nina, can you please talk some sense into him?" Mom pleaded, tired and exasperated.

Nina raised an eyebrow at her brother. "Jake, if you keep inhaling your food like that, you're gonna choke."

He barely even blinked. “That's quitter talk.”

She shrugged. If natural selection wanted to have a go, that was between them.

A bang at the door saved her from attempting to parent. Followed by a much louder voice.

“NINA!!! OPEN UP OR I'M BREAKING IN!”

Ah, yes. Liana. Right on schedule.

Nina headed for the door, grabbing an apple. "This is a house, not a bank vault. You're not breaking into anything."

The door swung open before she could reach it. Liana stood there, her dark curls looking like they’d barely survived a fight with a brush, and a look on her face that said she’d already made questionable decisions before 8 AM.

"Okay,” she said, stepping inside, “but imagine if I did break in." She wiggled her eyebrows. “Super impressive, right?"

Mom gave her a tired smile. “Morning, Liana.”

“Morning, Mrs. Yuki!” Liana waved, then turned to Nina. "Ready to survive another pointless school day?"

Nina grabbed her bag as the two headed out. Walking to school with Liana was always an experience. She had exactly two speeds: sluggish, and we’re-so-late!.

Today was sluggish.

"So," Nina asked, expectant, with a side-eye at Liana, as they walked down to school “did you actually sleep, or did you fall down another Eternal Child conspiracy rabbit hole?"

Liana grinned. “Okay, but hear me out,” she said, walking backwards to face her. “I found a forum. They think the government is testing some new superpower serum, and instead of picking volunteers, they're secretly dosing the school cafeteria food."

Nina stopped walking. She stared. “Liana. Be honest. Did you eat breakfast today?"

Liana blinked. "...I forgot"

Nina closed her eyes, exhaling slowly. “That explains so much."

---

By the time they reached school, the hallways were buzzing. But it wasn't the usual chatter. Today, everyone wanted to talk about Eternal Child Week — or more specifically, how it still made no sense.

"Dude, I checked every news site last night,” someone said near the lockers. “Nothing. Just the same old vague 'embrace the future' garbage."

Another student sighed dramatically. “What if it's some creepy social experiment and we're just part of a case study?"

Liana perked up, pointing aggressively. “YES, THANK YOU! Someone gets it!"

Nina pinched the bridge of her nose. “Liana, stop encouraging—"

She was cut off when Liana froze mid-step, her eyes locking onto something across the hall. Her grip latched onto Nina’s arm like a vise.

“Oh. My. Goodness."

Before Nina could react, Liana spun her around. She pointed.

Across the hall, standing like he’d just been cast in a cyberpunk anime, was Tyler.

His hair was neon. Electric. Blue. The kind of painfully blue you get from dunking your head into a radioactive Slushie. He was talking to his friends, totally unbothered, as if he hadn't been personally styled by a malfunctioning AI.

Around them, the hallway's rhythm hiccuped. A girl with a messy bun gawked openly, snapping a photo. Mrs. Callahan — the history teacher who held a personal grudge against fun — did a double-take, her coffee cup pausing mid-sip. Even the janitor, pushing a mop, gave Tyler a long, bewildered look before muttering something about 'kids these days'.

Nina turned back to Liana. "And?"

Liana looked at her like she had just committed an unforgivable crime. “Nina. This. Is. A. Big. Deal."

"It's just hair, Liana."

"Just hair?" Liana gestured wildly. "The school dress code is practically allergic to fun! Mr. Henderson once gave a kid detention because his socks were 'too loud.' If Tyler is walking around looking like that and no one is stopping him, it means the rules are gone. It means," she whispered, a dangerous gleam in her eye, "I could—"

“No,” Nina said immediately, her voice flat. "You and impulse decisions go together like fire and gasoline. Remember the last time you got ‘inspired'? You tried to ‘taste the rainbow’ with expired yogurt! Almost had a messy accident! And spent three consecutive days in the school bathroom!” Nina said exasperated.

Liana’s cheeks flushed a bright, embarrassed pink “T-that was a scientific experiment!”

“It was a biohazard!” Nina shot back, rubbing her temples as the warning bell shrieked. “Now! Can we please get to class!"

"And don't you dare think about touching a single dye!”

Liana grinned, her embarrassment vanishing as quickly as it came. “I make no promises.”

[mushy bottom]

 

Limited edition Bud Lite would be more of a joke than Pepsi.

 

 

[TBCuri]

Chapter 2: The Day I Snapped

By Tuesday, Eternal Child Week was in full swing, and honestly? It was a disaster.

The morning assembly alone was enough to scar. The same teachers who usually patrolled the halls with expressions of weary disapproval were now… singing. And dancing. Not an awkward two-step, either. This was a full-on, suspiciously choreographed routine.

Liana, of course, was thriving beside Nina, barely containing her laughter. “This is so cursed,” she whispered.

Nina just stared at the horror unfolding on stage. “Prime blackmail material,” she muttered, already cataloging the evidence.

The rest of the morning devolved into a blur of forced enthusiasm. A "nap-time challenge" saw Liana snoring triumphantly within seconds, an unsettlingly rapid descent into sleep. An "Eternal Child Week outfit design" contest ended with Nina depicted as a particularly sad clown (she retaliated by drawing Liana as a surprisingly detailed, and rather menacing, chicken). Then came the baby bottle relay. Nina mentally checked out for that one, refusing to even acknowledge its existence.

By lunchtime, her patience was a frayed thread, and Liana was still riding the chaos wave.

“Nina, hear me out,” Liana said as they walked home, a dangerous glint in her eye.

Nina groaned internally. “Every time you say that, my survival instincts activate.”

Liana grinned. “Let’s sign up for the talent show.”

Nina stopped walking. “Liana. No.”

“But it’s perfect! I say dumb things, you react dramatically, it’s literally our thing.”

“I already do that for free!”

“But what if there’s a prize?”

Nina sighed, rubbing her temples. “We’ll talk about it later.”

Liana smirked. “That’s not a no.”

~~~

The next morning, Nina was halfway through a piece of toast when Mom groaned from the hallway. "Jake, seriously?"

That tone told Nina everything she needed to know. She turned just in time to see Mom ushering her four-year-old brother toward the bathroom, his pajama pants sagging under the unmistakable weight of an overfilled pull-up.

Jake pouted. "I didn't feel it..."

"We just potty trained you, bud," Mom sighed.

Liana, who had stayed over and possessed no self-preservation instincts whatsoever, tilted her head as Jake whined. “Wow. That’s… pungent.”

Nina shot her a look. “You could stop listening.”

Liana grinned. “But then I’d miss the experience.” A second later, Mom gagged. Jake cheerfully declared, “It’s on my leg!”

Liana choked on her own toast.

Nina slammed her fork down. “I’m leaving.” She needed to escape before her brain melted.

---

By the time they got to school, Nina’s patience was already fraying. Then Liana managed to get herself stuck inside one of those giant inflatable tubes from gym class, flailing like an overturned beetle.

“Do I even want to know?” Nina asked, arms crossed.

Liana wheezed between giggles. “I… miscalculated.”

“Miscalculated what?”

“My size.”

Nina sighed, grabbed Liana’s arms, and yanked. Liana popped out like a cork, nearly taking Nina down with an unexpected burst of momentum.

“Wow!” Liana beamed. “You should enter the strength contest.”

Nina just turned and walked away.

The gym for the afternoon "Teacher Appreciation Pep Rally" was packed. Phones were out. Students stood on chairs. The teachers, gathered on stage, looked way too confident.

The principal cleared his throat. “As part of Eternal Child Week, it is our honor to celebrate the joy of youth in this glorious year! Let the Rally begin!”

Liana blinked. “That’s weirdly formal.”

“Focus on the real issue here,” Nina muttered. 

Had he actually said that? No, she must have misheard. The man probably hadn’t slept.

Just then the lights dimmed. Spotlights flicked on. Someone in the crowd whispered, “Oh, this is gonna be so bad...”

Then the music started. The science teachers began with some basic synchronized steps. Normal enough.

Then, out of nowhere, Mr. Hayes — the man with the bald head, always smelling of chalk dust — suddenly executed a flawless backflip.

Nina choked, d-did he just—?! Since when did the man who struggled to open a jar of pickles possess the agility of a seasoned gymnast? A ripple of uneasy murmurs went through the students, quickly drowned out by stunned applause.

Next, the math teachers synchronized like some kind of cursed boy band. Mr. Patel moonwalked. Smoothly. Another one did the worm, his limbs undulating with an unnatural fluidity.

Nina watched in abject shock “This is not happening,” she muttered.

Someone near them doubtfully whispered, “Are we sure they’re... human?”

Then Coach Reynolds – the 43 year old man –  stepped up to the stage. The second the beat dropped, he exploded into motion, spinning, flipping, at one point vaulting over a chair with terrifying grace.

Something isn't right... 

The crowd went feral, accepting the strangeness of it all.

“THIS MAN IS A BEAST!”

“I CAN’T BREATHE—”

As the grand finale, Coach Reynolds ran up the wall and flipped off it.

Nina grabbed Liana’s arm, her own heart hammering, head disoriented by the noise “What is happening?!”

Liana was losing it, gasping between laughs. “Oh my God, this is the greatest Week event ever!”

A student near them muttered, “This isn’t Eternal Child Week. This is Eternal Anime Week.”

Another, wearing glasses that seemed permanently askew from trauma, replied, “And this is just the first Eternal Child Week…”

And that was it. That was the moment Nina snapped.

~~~

They staggered back into the cafeteria after the horror show, Nina’s brain feeling like fried static. She sat down, barely processing the tray of food in front of her.

Then Liana leaned in, eyes sparkling with mischief. She cupped her hands around her mouth and shouted:

“THIS IS THE BEST ETERNAL CHILD WEEK EVER!!!”

The entire cafeteria went silent around Nina.

Something inside her, coiled tight for days, finally broke. The noise of the cafeteria, the chaos of the week, the sheer wrongness of teachers doing backflips—it all compressed into a single, white-hot point of rage behind her eyes.

 

Shut. Up!

Without thinking, she grabbed the apple from her tray. For a split second, a trick of the light made her hand look softer, paler, the fingers shorter… chubbier. Like when she was five, trying to open a juice box. Before she could process the strange image, her arm snapped forward with a will of its own. WHIP!
It flew. Fast. Too fast.

Liana dodged. Barely. Her eyes widened, catching a strange blue glimmer—just as the apple screamed past her ear like a bullet. A sudden, sharp intake of breath the only sound she made.

It struck another student square in the back of the head—

—and exploded on impact.

Silence.

A slow, dreadful turn. The student touched his head, pulling his hand away as if expecting blood. A chunk of mashed fruit slid off his shoulder with a wet plop.

“...Who,” he asked, voice strained, “just sniped me... with an apple?!”

Liana, now staring at Nina like she was a creature from the deep, clapped a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing.

Nina exhaled slowly, a strange calm settling over the rage. “I needed to do that. For my sanity.”

The student, still rubbing his head, scowled. “Who throws an apple that hard?! That actually hurt—”

Another student pointed. “It came from over there.”

Nina immediately grabbed her tray and pretended to be fascinated by her mashed potatoes.

Liana, trembling with a mixture of laughter and shock, leaned in. “Nina. You just sniped a man.”

Nina groaned, dropping her head into her hands. This week was going to end her.

And just like that, the day ended... Completely normal. Or so she tried to tell herself.

[mushy bottom]

Since you asked, I'd say that by now a reader should have some idea where this is going.  I don't.  And I'd call it bizarre rather than funny.  Diaper action?

[TBCuri]

25 minutes ago, mushy bottom said:

Since you asked, I'd say that by now a reader should have some idea where this is going.  I don't.  And I'd call it bizarre rather than funny.  Diaper action?

Sorry, this is my first time writing a story, I guess I didn't gather enough data. I'm more of programming than writing (not an excuse, I know...)

I'm actually trying a slow build up.

Hmm... 🤔 Was I too subtle? I did want it to be a sudden transition, also this is a prequel for the main story UnReal Paradox, I wasn't so serious with it 😅.

Thanks for the opinion, I greatly appreciate it 😃, if you could clarify where the error is, I would totally love it 👍.

What do you think? 🤔

[Brutal_Ink]

16 hours ago, TBCuri said:

Thanks for the opinion, I greatly appreciate it 😃, if you could clarify where the error is, I would totally love it 👍.

What do you think? 🤔

I'll start by saying that you have a very strong narrative voice. Your dialogue seems believable without taking itself too seriously. Your characters are interesting, but it's sort of difficult to tell what's happening.

Exposition is not always a bad thing. We don't learn the name of the main character until the first chapter, and while it's possible to infer that the characters are in school (I would guess high school, but it could also be middle school) but that's never actually stated anywhere. We need more information about who we're dealing with and where they are. You don't have to infodump, but if you're trying to transition to something that's abnormal for the characters, we have to know what normal is first.

Overall, I'd say you're doing a good job so far. I think my biggest advice would be to slow down a little and take some time to flesh out the characters a bit. I know that Nina is more serious than Liana, and that she has a little brother named Jake who recently potty-trained. I know that Liana is a little scatter-brained and impulsive, but that's all. What are their hobbies? Are they afraid of anything? Have they been friends for a long time, or is that a recent development? Are Nina and Liana actually friends, or do they just hang out because they're in school together? If they're friends, why are they friends? Do they have any hobbies or interests in common? Is it more to do with some kind of attraction from one (or both) parties?

Just some food for thought! Good work so far!

[Babypants]

I don't have much to add to what Mushy Bottom and Brutal Ink have said.  There's good flow here, and the back and forth between the two girls seems natural.  But having the Principal reference the year 3047 really threw me.  Kids are still going to school a thousand years in the future?  They're still carrying cell phones?  This doesn't make any sense, so I wondered if it was a joke that I simply wasn't getting.  If one of the girls had said this, I would have thought that she was being sarcastic, but the Principal?

In global terms, most stories that appear here don't pass the smell test because the setting is vague, and the characters cardboard cutouts.  Even more rare is character development during the course of the story.  In this regard, you've made a good start because your principal characters are well defined individuals, but on the flip side the setting does need work.  How old are the girls?  And how the heck could this be taking place in the 31st century when the interplay between them, and the background that we see, is so late 20th - early 21st century America?

[TBCuri]

On 2/16/2025 at 3:52 PM, Brutal_Ink said:

I'll start by saying that you have a very strong narrative voice. Your dialogue seems believable without taking itself too seriously. Your characters are interesting, but it's sort of difficult to tell what's happening.

Exposition is not always a bad thing. We don't learn the name of the main character until the first chapter, and while it's possible to infer that the characters are in school (I would guess high school, but it could also be middle school) but that's never actually stated anywhere. We need more information about who we're dealing with and where they are. You don't have to infodump, but if you're trying to transition to something that's abnormal for the characters, we have to know what normal is first.

Overall, I'd say you're doing a good job so far. I think my biggest advice would be to slow down a little and take some time to flesh out the characters a bit. I know that Nina is more serious than Liana, and that she has a little brother named Jake who recently potty-trained. I know that Liana is a little scatter-brained and impulsive, but that's all. What are their hobbies? Are they afraid of anything? Have they been friends for a long time, or is that a recent development? Are Nina and Liana actually friends, or do they just hang out because they're in school together? If they're friends, why are they friends? Do they have any hobbies or interests in common? Is it more to do with some kind of attraction from one (or both) parties?

Just some food for thought! Good work so far!

Thanks a lot 👍🏻, I'll take note of that 😃.

On 2/16/2025 at 4:33 PM, Babypants said:

I don't have much to add to what Mushy Bottom and Brutal Ink have said.  There's good flow here, and the back and forth between the two girls seems natural.  But having the Principal reference the year 3047 really threw me.  Kids are still going to school a thousand years in the future?  They're still carrying cell phones?  This doesn't make any sense, so I wondered if it was a joke that I simply wasn't getting.  If one of the girls had said this, I would have thought that she was being sarcastic, but the Principal?

In global terms, most stories that appear here don't pass the smell test because the setting is vague, and the characters cardboard cutouts.  Even more rare is character development during the course of the story.  In this regard, you've made a good start because your principal characters are well defined individuals, but on the flip side the setting does need work.  How old are the girls?  And how the heck could this be taking place in the 31st century when the interplay between them, and the background that we see, is so late 20th - early 21st century America?

 I was actually experimenting... 

Thanks for pointing that out though, It's fixed now. 😃

Chapter 3, currently being refined...

[TBCuri]

Chapter 3 – What The Heck? Seriously?!

Day 4

Nina’s morning kicked off with a scream.

Not a normal scream.

The kind of scream you only hear when someone’s either seen a ghost or done something ridiculously dumb.

“I DID IT!!!”

Jake’s voice echoed through the house like he had just won an epic battle.

Nina groaned into her pillow. “Congratulations, buddy, you’ve peaked.”

From the kitchen, her mom barked, “Nina, get up! You’re gonna be late!”

“I know!” she shot back, dragging herself out of bed like a zombie. Her entire soul protested the movement, but she forced herself up anyway, shuffling toward the bathroom half-conscious.

One splash of cold water later, she glared at her reflection. Her hair looked like it had lost a fight with an electrical outlet. Her oversized T-shirt—with a faded cartoon character she barely remembered—hung off her shoulder like it had given up on life. She looked exactly how she felt.

Dragging a brush through her tangled mess of hair, she muttered, “This is totally fine. I’m fine.”

She was not fine.

A few minutes later—after throwing on her uniform, cramming her backpack with zero organization, and shoveling toast into her mouth—she bolted out the door, barely making it to the bus stop.

The bus door hissed open, and Nina stumbled inside, out of breath. Liana was already there, earbuds in, scrolling her phone like the embodiment of calm. When she looked up and saw Nina, she grinned.

“You look like you got wrecked by a vacuum cleaner,” she said, tossing a chip at her.

With zero effort, Nina caught it mid-air and ate it. “Jake finally conquered the toilet,” she deadpanned. “I lost my sanity in the process.”

Liana cackled. “A worthy sacrifice.”

Their bus rides were always this shared misery. They had been best friends since third grade—ever since Nina’s legendary death glare scared off the kid who had stolen Liana’s lunch. From that moment on, their friendship had been the perfect mix of Liana’s reckless chaos and Nina’s fraying sanity.

Liana suddenly nudged her. “Ever think about what you’d do if something insanely weird went down?”

Nina side-eyed her. “Liana, we live in a world where school starts at 7 AM. Weird happens all the time.”

“No, like, seriously weird—like waking up in an alternate universe or suddenly getting superpowers.”

“…What were you watching last night?”

Liana hesitated.

Nina folded her arms. “Girl. You need to chill on the sci-fi.”

Liana shrugged. “Joke’s on you. Sci-fi is life.”

The school day started like every other slow descent into madness. Teachers droned on. Students pretended to care. Liana, as usual, wasn’t even trying. She spent the entire first period doodling questionable stick figures in her notebook while Nina actually attempted to take notes.

By third period, Nina had given up.

By lunch, she was questioning her entire existence.

“This week is never going to end,” she muttered, stabbing at her tray of unidentifiable cafeteria food.

Liana, as always, was unbothered. Balancing a spoon on her nose, she grinned. “Look on the bright side—at least no one’s forcing us to drink out of baby bottles today.”

Nina groaned. “Don’t remind me.”

Liana snorted. “Still can’t believe you refused to participate.”

“I refuse to acknowledge that event ever happened.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I like to think of it as self-respect.”

Liana rolled her eyes and took another bite of her sandwich. “Anyway, I had a weird dream last night.”

Nina raised an eyebrow. “Please don’t say it involved government experiments.”

“Worse.”

“…Worse?”

Liana leaned in dramatically. “What if Eternal Child Week isn’t just a holiday? What if it’s—”

Nina immediately held up a hand. “Nope. Shutting that down.”

Liana pouted. “You didn’t even let me finish!”

“I have a stress limit, and you are dangerously close to exceeding it.”

Liana smirked. “I live to test your patience.”

Nina sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “One day, Liana. One day.”

The bell rang, signaling the start of fourth period.

 

---

 

Nina was on her way to class, mind fully checked out, when it happened.

One second, everything was normal.

The next?

A glowing screen materialized out of thin air right in front of her face.

She stopped dead in her tracks. Her brain short-circuited.

“…What.”

The screen hovered in the air, impossible to ignore.

---

Congratulations! You are now an Eternal Child! Accept your transformation with grace…

---

She blinked. Once. Twice.

It was still there.

She turned her head, but no one else seemed to notice the literal glowing notification floating in front of her face.

Before she could even begin to process, a strange warmth spread through her body. A warmth that sank into her bones. Her heart stuttered.

Then—

Her clothes started glowing.

“Oh, no.”

The fabric shifted around her, morphing into something totally different. Her skirt shrank. Way, way shorter. Her blouse melted away, twisting into something pastel and frilly. Her shoes transformed into tiny, cartoonish sneakers.

The hallway around her felt wrong. Like it was too big. Like the world had just zoomed out.

Her stomach dropped.

Wait—did everything get bigger?

She held up her hands. Smaller. A bit pudgy.

Nope.

It wasn’t the hallway.

She was shrinking.

Panic clawed at her throat. Her legs wobbled. Her entire body felt alien.

And then—

Her stomach flipped. A wave of pure nausea slammed into her.

Before she could fight it—

She threw up. Everything. Her entire breakfast. Right there. In the middle of the hallway.

Her vision spun. Her legs gave out.

And then—

Darkness.

 

---

 

Meanwhile, in another classroom, Liana was doing absolutely nothing productive. Which, to be fair, was normal.

She slouched in her chair, scrolling her phone, barely paying attention to whatever the teacher was rambling about.

And then—

A glowing screen popped up right in front of her face.

---

Congratulations! You are now an Eternal Child! Accept your transformation with grace…

---

Liana blinked. Then squinted. Then tilted her head.

“Uh… excuse me?” she mumbled.

No one else reacted.

She waved a hand through the screen. It didn’t move.

“…Huh.”

Before she could question it further, a strange warmth spread from her fingertips to her toes.

Her hoodie and jeans shimmered—then melted away. In their place?

A super pink dress. With a lacy collar. And ribbons. And frills.

Liana froze.

Her combat boots vanished, replaced by sparkly flats that screamed childhood nostalgia. The room shifted.

Or rather—

She shrunk.

Her desk stretched upward, looming over her like a giant’s furniture. Liana’s stomach dropped.

Her voice came out soft. “What the hell—”

So. Soft.

Liana’s eye twitched.

Her stomach flipped. Before she could even process what was happening—

She puked. Everywhere.

Her entire breakfast, gone.

The world tilted. Her head spun.

And then—

Everything went black.

Edited March 4 by TBCuri

[dmavn]

I approve.. Truck kun is used waaay too much

Now to see if this was just the two of them or half the school…

[TBCuri]

On 3/6/2025 at 3:42 AM, dmavn said:

I approve.. Truck kun is used waaay too much

Now to see if this was just the two of them or half the school…

😄

Chapter 4 In progress...

[TBCuri]

OK! I'VE HAD ENOUGH!

TO WAR WITH THE FOLLOWING:

Aetherborns (The 'Evil' Magicians...etc)

The Amazons Dimensions

TO WAR!!

My Army will ready soon! 

You better be ready!

[TBCuri]

Prologue to Chapter 2 Done

[TBCuri]

<Pipeline Failure! -> Human Rewrite: Failure! Too Inexperienced --> Human Deduction: Story too fast-paced! Character development: Redundant! Generic!>

<New Direction: Slow Burn Forge! -> Construct the Bones! --> Build the Flesh! --> Infuse the Human Soul!>

More Suggestions Requested.