The New Foster

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani was content with her coloring book. She was enjoying coloring in her favorite  Bluey characters. She was extremely focused. She was happy to have a water bottle given to her even if it was by Charlotte. She decided to trust it since Rebecca got one too and she did like being able to drink whenever she wanted. She still wasn’t used to that.

She frowned a bit when Rebecca asked her to share. She wanted to say no. She wanted to have her things for herself! She never got to have anything! Tom said all the things he got her were for her. Why did Rebecca want to use her pencils?

She didn’t say a word though. She put her pencil back in the box and handed Rebecca the black one. She squirmed silently while she waited, unable to color herself. She had a kind of rule she made for herself. She only took out one pencil at a time. Because the other girl was using one, she had to wait now.

 

[Ishigreensa]

When Rebecca noticed that she gave her the black pencil and closed her box, she wrapped her hand back around Lani's hand and with a serious frown, she asked.

"Lani, I didn't mean to interrupt you coloring.  If you won't color because I have one of your pencils, then I don't have to use it.  I did tell you, you can say no.  Remember, it's yours."

She put the pencil in her hand.  "I was just trying to be a friend, and friends sometimes borrow but only if their friend wants to.  You never have to let someone borrow something you don't want them to.  You know?  Like, I shared my princess coloring book with you because I don't mind, but I didn't share this book with you because it's my favorite.  Does that make sense to you?"

She smiled.

"I'm sorry.  Am I talking too much?"

She turned to look out the window trying to give Lani some time to think.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani frowned when Rebecca grabbed her hand. She didn’t like this one bit. “Don’t touch me!” She yelled unhappily. She was used to standing up to other kids and yelling at them, even though she’d never do that to an adult.

She jammed the pencil back in the box and went back to her own coloring. “You’re not my friend.” She said in a meaner tone than she realized or intended. She was upset and didn’t like having to share and didn’t like Rebecca grabbing her. She didn’t mean it in a bad way, she was just stating a fact.

She squirmed in her car seat some more, hugging her dragon and drinking her water as she silently focused on her coloring.

 

Charlotte sighed and looked over at Tom when she heard Lani yell. She started worrying if it was a good idea to take them on such a long car ride together. 

[Ishigreensa]

Tom looked back at her.

"Honey, we are never going to be able to do anything as a family if we don't get them used to each other.  Just let them have space to work things out between them.  As long as they don't hurt each other, we can't mitigate every little feud they have.  Heck, my sister and I fought like cats and dogs told each other we hated each other, but I know now, that was just because we were expected to hate each other.  Kids think things that don't make sense, and I will tell her, as often as I told my sister I hated her, I would pummel the first kid that tried to smack her on the head, and if it was a girl, I'd trip her."

He sighed.

"They live in the same house, and they are going to have to learn to get along and learn what pushes each other's buttons.  Don't worry too much."

 

Rebecca felt her lower lip quiver at the sudden outburst that she wasn't her friend.  She had tried so hard to be patient, but for her just to say it like that?  What was she trying so hard for?  She crossed her arms and sat sulking.

"Fine.  If I'm not your friend, then you should say NO, next time.  Stupid!"

She looked out the window again.

"Rebecca?  Calling her stupid is out of line."

"But...."

"No!  I know you are upset, but calling her names will not make her your friend."

"She doesn't want to be friends.  She said so!"

Tom sighed.  "I don't know.  Maybe if we just let them cool down a bit?"

[Shy-Diapers]

Charlotte sighed. “I guess you’re right. I just worry. And you know this isn’t how we had planned things to go.” She frowned as the girls continued to fight. She was shocked to hear Rebecca call Lani stupid. She didn’t think her daughter would ever say that. She didn’t say anything though, since Tom already did.

 

Lani scowled and clenched her fists when Rebecca fought back. “I’m not stupid!” She protested back, yelling once again.

Her heart was racing. This is usually where things would evolve into another kid hitting or pushing Lani and her fighting back. She had tears welling up in her eyes. She hated being called stupid. Even if deep down she thought she was stupid. She was so used to hearing it from everyone, but that didn’t mean she’d let this new girl call her that!

She bit her lip hard and stared at her lap, squeezing her dragon tightly to her chest. She had no way to calm herself down, because she’d never been taught or shown such a thing. She didn’t know what to do so she just sat there silently, tears rolling down her face. 

[Ishigreensa]

Rebecca was not going to forgive her this time.  She was the one that started this.  She was trying to be nice, and the girl said to her, "You're not my friend!"  It was so final in the way she said it, that Rebecca felt like it was no more use to be nice to her.  If she was going to be like that, then she wasn't going to be civil either.  She had her chance, and she blew it!

She looked out the window abandoning her coloring completely, and just resting her head against the window, and then even though he heard her say that they were not friends, like it was final, her own dad took her side by just yelling at her.  Fine!  Let Lani have her dad then.  Fine.

Tears welled up in her eyes, but she started out the window, not wanting anyone to see that she was about to cry.

Before the hour was over, she had fallen asleep in the car.

[Shy-Diapers]

Charlotte took a deep breath before she got out of the car. She hoped the rest of the day would go more smoothly.

“Okay. Does anyone need the bathroom right now? The first aid station is the only real bathroom here. Everything else is a porta potty.” She explained to both kids and Tom. “Let’s go get our wristbands then we can see what everyone wants to do.”

When they got to the ticket booth she turned to Tom. “Maybe wait to see if Lani likes the idea of any of the rides before we get her one?” She suggested.

 

Lani had a little bit of a bloody lip and a tear stained face when Tom retrieved her from the backseat. She had bit her lip so hard from trying to restrain herself. She wanted to push or hit Rebecca, but she knew if she did that she’d get sent away again. She grabbed her dragon and set down her empty water bottle, keeping her eyes on the ground. She didn’t dare say anything to the adults, for fear of them not wanting her anymore. 

[Ishigreensa]

Tom squatted down as he opened the door, and when he saw the blood on her lip, he rounded on Rebecca.

"What did you do to her?"

"Nothing.  Dad.  I just looked out the window.  She said she didn't want to be friends, and I accepted it and stopped talking to her."

"Then why is her mouth all bloody?"

"I don't know.  I didn't do it!"

He sighed.  "You're on thin ice, young lady."

Rebecca started to tear up.  She didn't touch her.  It seemed no matter what, that kid was going to get her in trouble in one way or another! She balled her fists and shook with frustration.

He looked at Charlotte.  "I think maybe we should maybe keep these two apart for a few minutes, maybe take Rebecca to look at something in one direction, and I'll take her in another, and we definitely need to stop by the first aid get something for her bloody lip."

Rebecca turned away from Lani no longer interested in being friends.  She's been mean since she got there, and even when Rebecca tried to be nice to her, she just ruins it.  She was tired of trying.  She didn't understand how she got her own lip to bleed, but she knew she didn't hit her.  Rebecca was scared of hitting truth be told.

 

Tom picked Lani up and started to take her off to the first aid area to get fixed up. 

Only once they were out of earshot, she looked back at her mom.  "I was mad at her and called her stupid, okay?  But I never hit her.  I didn't.  I don't know why her lip is bleeding.  And I only said it like that because she was being, well, not smart.  I explained everything before I even asked for her to share, trying a different way, you know, but then she came out and said.... "You're not my friend, like she would never be friends with me, like I was... I don't know.  It got me so upset, I just said the first thing out of my mouth and I said maybe you should say so then instead of just handing yourself over like you're stupid."  She was crying.

 

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani was too scared to say anything when Tom yelled at Rebecca. She flinched and stiffened up, her posture straight as a board. She didn’t know what to do and was still struggling not to cry.

“I’m sorry!” She squeaked instinctively as soon as Tom picked her up. He was being gentle, but her anxiety was still high. As he carried her and remained calm, she started to relax a bit, gripping as tightly to him and her dragon as she could. She didn’t really realize she’d bit her lip so hard. It hadn’t been bloody enough for her to taste it or anything, just enough to break the skin.

 

Charlotte took a deep breath and kneeled down with Rebecca. “I heard everything Becca.” She said in a calm and even tone. “I know you know it’s not okay to call someone stupid. Daddy already scolded you so I’m not going to.” She continued, modeling deep breaths for her daughter. “Calling her not smart is not nice either. Maybe she does things differently than you’re used to, but that’s not a reason to call her not smart. I believe you that you didn’t hit her. It’s alright.”

She gave her a big hug. “Take some deep breaths and then we can go do what you want. We drove all this way to have fun. I don’t want you being upset the entire time.”

[Ishigreensa]

"Can I please go to the regular bathroom before we start?  I know dad is going the same way, but you said that's the only good bathrooms, and I don't like the smell of the other types."

She looked up at her mom.

"Okay, I'll say I'm sorry, but not right now.  I'm still mad at her right now."

She looked down.  "Can I please say I'm sorry when I can calm down and mean it?  I know it was bad to say stupid to her.  I hate it when bullies call me stupid, too, so I get that it's not nice."

She hugged her mommy hoping she'd take the compromise, and she would try harder to find a way to describe what she feels without using smart or dumb terms.  She may have to, because it seemed that the little fiery pitbull had a will set against her, and she had said they were not friends, so Rebecca didn't know what to do about that now.  The ball was entirely in the other girl's court on that, because she wasn't about to force something that the other kid clearly didn't want.

 

Tom brought the little one to the first aid tent, and set her on his lap and calmly talked to her after she had stopped tensing up as much.

"Honey, how did you get a bloody lip?" he asked her.  "If Rebecca bumped your jabbed something in your direction and it hit your lip by mistake, you can say so, sweetheart.  She was already scolded for hitting you, and if she did actually hit you, and you tell me she did, then we'll make sure she knows that's not okay, baby."

He hugged her.

They came and got some cotton balls for him to dab at her lip so he could see how bad it was, and when he realized it was superficial, he sighed in relief, and just kept hugging her until she was ready to move on.

"Why did you tell her you're not friends, though, sweetheart?  Did she do something mean to you before you said that?"

 

[Shy-Diapers]

Charlotte nodded. “Thank you for paying attention to your body.” She said as they headed to the bathroom near the first aid station. They wouldn’t have to go into where Lani and Tom are luckily.

”That’s completely fair. I don’t think it would be received well right now anyway.” She said gently. She was glad Rebecca took it upon herself to apologize without being prompted.

 

Lani shrugged and stared at the dragon in her lap. “She didn’t hit me.” She said honestly. She didn’t really know why her lip got a little bloody. She didn’t do it intentionally and hadn’t even noticed it until Tom pointed it out to her.

She squirmed a bit more than usual when he asked her about what she said. She was certainly going to be in trouble for that. She just hoped it wouldn’t be bad enough to send her away. She was struggling to think of how to respond, so she was focusing really hard. “She said she was being my friend.” She said with a little shrug. “She’s not my friend.” Her voice was nonchalant. She didn’t see what was wrong with what she said. She just met her and the girl had been much too overbearing for her liking. In her mind, she was just stating a fact.

She sighed a bit and stared down still. “Do I have to go? Cuz I said something bad?” She asked sadly. She had been so excited for the fair but now she probably wouldn’t get to have fun. “They make me sit out if I say something bad at school.” Her voice was full of sadness. The way she spoke about it indicated she’d experienced sitting out of fun activities more than once.

[Ishigreensa]

"She didn't hit your lip or bump it or anything?" he asked her.  "Because lips don't normally bleed without a reason, sweetheart.  It looks like you bit into it.  What caused that?"

He picked her up and rubbed her back and tried to talk to her while showing her he was there, and he was trying to be on her side.

"Well...," he smiled when she started to explain why she was squirming and what was making her nervous about it all.  "A friend is someone you like and you play with, but there is a way of being, which is called friendly, and then there is 'being a friend.'  Maybe you've missed how people use those things differently.  Being a friend doesn't mean you are already friends, all the time, but it does mean, you are taking steps towards trying to understand another person, and trying to make them feel comfortable with you.  What she may have meant, when she said 'be a friend' is that she wanted to start communicating with you to work towards that."

He smiled.

"You know, she's been doing a lot of nice things for you trying to be recognized but maybe she feels like you've been rejecting her, and maybe, when she asked for your pencil for a moment, maybe she thought you were tired of her treating you like you need help all the time, so she tried to put herself on the other end of things, and ask your help, but she didn't know that was going to upset you, either."

He rubbed her back.

"I don't know who has been taking care of you or what your mommy's situation is like, but it seems like you've not had much time to see how other people interact.  So, no, sweetheart, you are not missing this.  If people keep stopping you from interacting with people because of misunderstandings and because things don't always go well, that is not going to help you understand how communication with others work.  You need some experience outside of the house to get it.  We are still going to go out there, after your bloody lip is taken care of, and we are going to find something you'd like to do.  We'll take a break from the other two for about twenty minutes though so you can both calm down, okay?"

He hugged.

"I know this doesn't solve everything but for now, it's what we can do so you girls can start having fun.  The reason we took you both out, is so you can have fun, sweetie."

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani didn’t look at Tom as he explained the difference. She understood what he was saying, but still didn’t see what was wrong with what she said. All she said was that she wasn’t Rebecca’s friend. That didn’t go against anything he was explaining to her. What was wrong with what she said? They weren’t friends and Lani didn’t have a desire to be her friend. School taught her that she didn’t need to be everyone’s friend, just that she needed to be nice. In her mind she’d been perfectly nice to Rebecca aside from when she instigated things.

She felt tears well up in her eyes as he continued on. It felt like he was blaming her. All she said was that she wasn’t her friend! She was getting increasingly upset and frustrated the more he said. She clenched her eyes shut and threw her arms down in frustration. If she’d been on her feet she’d have stomped them. “She touched me! I said she’s not my friend! She called me stupid!” She yelled unhappily. She hadn’t meant to raise her voice but she was too emotional to help it. “I’m not stupid!” Huge tears were pouring down her face. It was clear that not only did Rebecca strike a nerve, but that Lani must be feeling safer if she was willing to yell and act out in front of Tom. She was so used to being called stupid by almost everyone around her, adults and kids alike, and she hated it.

What was just sadness and disappointment a moment ago, had turned into frustration and anger. She didn’t understand what was wrong with what she said. It felt like Tom was scolding her but she didn’t know why. He didn’t tell her explicitly what she did wrong so she didn’t know. He didn’t seem to be upset about the yelling, so she was clueless. 

[Ishigreensa]

"Sweetheart, do you not understand that when most kids say to each other: "You are not my friend," they usually mean that I don't like you and will never be friends with someone like you!"  He patted her back as he said this.  "I'm afraid, that as factual as what you said was not necessarily wrong, Rebecca might understood that you hated her."

He sighed.

"I don't know.  Do you hate her, sweetheart?  Did she do something that made you so upset you could never be her friend?"

He wasn't really sure how else to explain this stuff to her.  "Being a friend to you," didn't mean she assumed you were friends yet.  It meant that she was trying to offer her friendship to you.  She was trying to find a way to communicate with you, but if you really don't like her, then maybe we should think about some stuff, because two kids that hate each other would have a hard time living in the same house."

He shook his head.

"You know what, I don't know what else to say.  I don't think dwelling on this is going to make things easier for you.  I haven't seen any indication that you hate her, so how about we just try to forget about this for now, and maybe come back to it when we can talk about it as a family later."

He started to carry her out of the first aid tent.

"What would you like to do first, sweetie?"

 

Rebecca came out of the toilets, and she looked over at the little carts on the tracks that went up high, did loops, and even turned over and went upside down!  There was a huge line, and Rebecca wasn't even sure if her wrist band would let her ride it.

"Mom, that one looks like a ton of fun!"

She didn't know that being short for her age would have her having to wait at least another year before she was tall enough for that ride.  She was close, and would find out when they came up to the line entrance, but she would be just under and due to the danger of falling out when it went upside down, they were strict with the height on this one.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani looked confused when Tom explained to her how Rebecca probably felt. She shook her head honestly, tears still flowing down her face. She didn’t understand why she felt that way. “I didn’t say that!” She said insistently, though no longer yelling. She worried a bit that Tom thought she did. She could see how Rebecca would be hurt if she said that, but she didn’t. Maybe the girl just misunderstood her. It seemed like everyone always did anyway, so it wasn’t a new concept for Lani.

She shook her head. “I don’t hate her.” She said in a calmer tone. “Hating is mean.” She added after the fact.

She had been calming down and seemed to be doing better until Tom mentioned the girls having trouble living together. Her face went pale and the big tears came back in full force, spilling out immediately. “No! I’ll be good! I don’t wanna go!” She sobbed uncontrollably, starting to hyperventilate. “Please!” She begged. “If I get sent away again Miss Maria said I wouldn’t get to see Mommy!” She was shaking, the poor little girl was so scared that she’d messed up in a big way. “I promise!”

 

Charlotte smiled and walked out with Rebecca. “Let’s go see if you’re tall enough.” She said gently. They went to the fair every year, and Rebecca had been too short to do a lot of rides last year. She didn’t want to wait in line for ages just to be turned away. She knew her daughter was still a bit short and would have a few limitations still.

They walked up beside the line to the measurement stand and Charlotte frowned a bit. “You’re a bit too short still, honey. I’m sure you can ride next year. Let’s go find something else to do. We can go on the big Ferris wheel if you want. You’re big enough to go on that one alone this year.” She suggested in a cheery voice, not wanting her daughter to be too disappointed. 

[Ishigreensa]

"Sweetheart," he cuddled her and walked through the crowds towards the tent they sold ice cream.  "No one is sending you back.  You just said you didn't hate Becks.  She just needs to understand that you sometimes say things differently than she's used to."

He rubbed her back.

"We might need to learn some triggering words for each other in a family discussion," he patted her back trying to calm her more.  "I think some words scare or make you more upset than other kids, and some words that seem neutral to you might be words that make Rebecca feel upset.  It's going to be easier to live together if we start trying to pay attention to these cues with each other.  Don't you think so, sweetie?"

He finally got to the ice cream tent.

"Can you point out or tell the man what flavor you want?" he asked her.

 

Rebecca sighed at the line, wishing with her might that it would get lower, but when it didn't and her mom reminded her that for the first time ever, she was tall enough for the Ferris Wheel by herself, she nodded and smiled.

"Okay!  That sounds like fun!  I'd get to see the whole park from up there!"

 

Tom continued trying to talk to Lani until she saw something that interest her as he walked her around letting her eat her ice cream.

"You might feel a little confused by things, sweetie," he told her.  "But you never have to call us anything you don't want to, and we all really do care about your feelings, even if Rebecca called you that ugly word.  She doesn't normally waste time trading insults with people she doesn't like.  I know it's not right, but I almost feel like even her taking a the time to fight with you by calling you an ugly word, she was saying, in her own confused way, you are worth her time, sweetheart.  It means she does care what you think."

He wasn't sure explaining things to her was the best way, but he didn't know how else to pass the awkward time either until she could figure out that she was not going anywhere, and they had no intention of ditching her.  He just wanted her to understand, that words can have harsher meanings to some people that you might think.  Aunt Charlotte, for example, seems to understand how hurtful the ugly word Rebecca said to you was, and while I always knew it was a bad thing to say to people, I didn't always know how hurtful it was.  I do think Rebecca knows it was hurtful though, and she said it because she thought you were being hurtful, not that it was a good excuse.  She's been taught better than that, and to walk away from conversations where you know you are only going to hurt each other, which is why she was scolded for it."

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani squeezed her dragon close as they headed to get ice cream. She pointed at the lemon flavor without saying a word. Talking to the stranger running the stand was not something she wanted to do.

She didn’t really understand what Tom meant about triggering words and having a conversation, but she didn’t have the energy to ask right then. She was only just starting to calm down since Tom had reassured her that they weren’t getting rid of her.

 

Charlotte smiled and headed to the Ferris wheel line with Rebecca. As it shortened and they got closer, she turned to her. “Do you want to ride alone or with me?” She asked, not sure what her preference was. She wanted to allow Becca to be independent, but knew the first time being up so high alone could be scary.

 

“Everything is always confusing.” Leilani said with a little shrug. She was mostly calm by this point, well as calm as she could be with how much was going on around her. She ate her ice cream while they walked around. “I’m not stupid.” She repeated in a sad tone. “I’m not.” It was clear that the word had hit her hard and clearly bothered her more than most kids.

With Tom trying to point out rides to Lani, but finding that she was too small for many, Lani hesitantly looked up at Tom when she saw a petting zoo area in the distance. “Can we see the animals please?” She asked hopefully, her personality coming back to her voice again. She was keeping a very tight grip on Tom’s hand the whole time. Once her ice cream was gone she held her dragon to her chest. She wanted to see the animals really bad so she really wanted to push through how overstimulated she was starting to feel. 

[Ishigreensa]

"No, baby," he said in agreement with her.  "You are not stupid.  Sometimes people use that word a bit too often, and it doesn't accurately tell what people are frustrated about.  I know you're not, baby.  You are reading books, frankly, that are way above your peer's reading ability.  No one stupid could do that, honey."

He rubbed her back.  

"Oh, animals!  Of course, but you need to finish your ice cream first, and then I need to hold your dinosaur so the goats don't get at it.  They will eat almost anything."

He squatted down by her.

"I'll tell you what, when you need me, I'll get low enough for you to touch your dinosaur, but when you are playing with the animals, I want to keep your dinosaur safe from the mouths of animals that don't know any better, okay?"

 

Rebecca said with resolve she wanted to do it alone, but at the last minute, as she was about to get in, she asked up at the attendant.  "Can my mom come in with me?  Please?"

He smiled and let Charlotte join her daughter.  It didn't cut anyone off since she was going to ride alone at first anyway, and it would be the same cart.

"I'm sorry, mom, but I decided I wanted to share the view with you," she said explaining herself which was only half true, and her mother probably knew she was nervous to go up all the way that high by herself.

 

While they were playing around the animals, Tom let her try different treats for the different animals.  He figured she'd like them licking the food out of her hand, but he was hesitant with the goats and other stubborn animals that were known to bite at their food.  It wasn't that he knew what these animals would do, but he had conceptions about certain animals, and the worse thing that could happen, is an animal lip over her hand, and she might get upset because she thought it bit her.

 

When they were nearly to the top, Rebecca held her mom a little closer, but continued to point out at the park excitedly.

"Okay," she finally admitted.  "I'm still a little bit ... like this much..." and she cutely put her fingers together to show a space between the thumb and forefinger of one hand "... still scared to be up her alone.  It feels better with mommy next to me."

She squirmed next to her.  "But if you tell my friends, I will not admit it," she laughed looking up at her mom.  "Fifth graders are not supposed to be scared of baby things no more, but I guess I kind of am."

She looked down sort of ashamed of herself for it.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani wanted to say that everyone called her stupid, but she decided not to. She just nodded along and clung to Tom’s side even more now that her ice cream was finished. She hesitantly gave Tom her dragon, deciding to trust him. Though she couldn’t help but ask. “Will I get him back?”

Lani was excited to try feeding the animals. She liked feeding the ones that didn’t lick her hands. As soon as one licked her hand, she pulled it away with a grimace and flapped her hand in the air for a bit. She didn’t like the sensation of that. After that she stuck mostly to petting rather than feeding.

“I like alpacas a lot.” She said with a smile. She stood petting it over and over again. “I’ve never seen one in real life before!” She seemed so excited to touch an animal she’d only read about in books.

 

Charlotte smiled. She was more than happy to ride with Rebecca. “You don’t need to apologize sweetheart.” She said gently. To be honest she half expected this anyway.

“I won’t tell your friends, I promise.” She smiled. “It’s not a baby thing to be scared of.” She said kindly. “I know tons of adults who are scared of heights. It’s perfectly reasonable and fine to be scared. We’re awfully high up! It’s normal honey.”

[Ishigreensa]

"Of course you'll get him back," Tom smiled and patted her shoulder as he let her move around the animals at her own comfort.  

"They are pretty interesting creatures, aren't they?" he nodded at her.  "Do you read about animals a lot?"

He smiled and reached in his jacket and took out his phone, and shot a couple of pictures of her and the alpacas.

"You know, you like to read so much, I think a subscription to the National Geographic or something similar would do wonders for your education."

 

He walked over where they were selling souvenir buttons that read "I fed an alpaca and bought it for her.  It was purple with pink glittery letters, and while he did so, he kept close watch of her, and of her dino-buddy that she was trusting him with.

 

"If being scared is normal of high places, then why do they have so many rides so high and fast?  Is it because it's normal to think getting scared is fun?" she asked looking up at her mother rather quizzically.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani gave a bit of a shrug in response to Tom’s question. “Sometimes.” She said truthfully. “I like reading about animals, but I really like history!” She said excitedly. “It’s my favorite! The library has lots of books about it.”

It seemed even if only for a moment, Leilani was a normal child. She was talking about what she liked to do and what interested her. Sure from the outside she seemed like a much younger kid doing so, but she was happy.

She clung a bit to Tom when she noticed the nearby horse and the cow barns. “They’re so big.” She said anxiously. “I didn’t know they were that big.” She said timidly, gripping onto his pant leg with both hands.

 

“Well just because it’s normal doesn’t mean everyone is scared of heights. Plenty of people aren’t and that’s okay too.” Charlotte explained to Rebecca.

As they started their descent she asked. “What do you want to do next?”

 

[Ishigreensa]

We don't have to get close to the big ones if you don't want to, sweetheart.  I think they only meant us to pet the small ones anyway.  They are probably either going to let people ride a horse, or milk a cow, or something like that over there, and that might be a big much for you, though you can still look if you want?"

He was trying to be attentive to whatever she was ready for, scared of, or excited about because he honestly didn't know any of her real drives other than what they had been though until now.  Besides, you haven't really been on any rides yet.  Don't you want to maybe ride the Merry-go-around or something?" he asked her.

 

"Well, daddy's not here right now, so go carts and bumper cars are no fun.  I like to try to beat him or crash his car as many times as I can," she said with a twinkle in her eye.  "Oh!  Look over there!"

Rebecca wasn't supposed to want any toys, but she had seen a place where it looked like they were teaching people how to make a hard-plastic necklace.  Of course she had her beads and she could do one just fine with that, but it wouldn't be the same as having a necklace with a design you made however they were going to teach you, and push it through clear plastic, and well, it was a toy, and mom did say no toys.

"Never mind," Rebecca remembered her mom's rule.  "It just looked interesting, but um...."

She started to look around for something else to do not wanting her mom to think she was trying to get her to get that one.  She didn't expect it.  In her house, her mom taught her, that once it's a "no," it's a "NO."

"Oh, they have one of those mirror fun houses up!  That might be fun to walk through!"

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani nodded. “Okay…” She said a bit hesitantly. She was happy to get away from the large animals. She wasn’t used to experiencing so much in person. She’d never been on a merry-go-round before. She’d seen little ones in stores, but never a big one like the fair had.

She reached up for her dragon when they’d left the animals. It took a second for her to use her words. “Can I have him?” She asked hopefully, not thinking to be polite until after. “Please?”

Once Tom had returned him to her, she gripped it in her right arm and held Tom’s hand with her left hand. As they started getting closer she grew more fidgety and restless. The area with the rides was a lot more crowded and loud. She wasn’t too sure about how many people were surrounding her and how many loud sounds she heard. Not to mention it was quite warm and there were so many smells in the air.

 

Charlotte was glad Rebecca was listening to her rule. Though at the same time she didn’t quite consider that to be a toy. “When we meet back up with Daddy and Lani we can see if she’s interested in that.” She suggested as a compromise.

“That sounds fun!” She chirped happily as they headed over to the fun house. “Let’s go in.”

[Ishigreensa]

Tom liked it when she was polite, but nevertheless, he handed it immediately over when she asked for it without asking please.  It was her dinosaur, while he especially wanted to teach her to be polite when asking for things in general, he felt it was uncalled for that she should have to be polite for her own things, as long as she wasn't just out right bratty or demanding, and she wasn't.  He had trained Rebecca the same way.  If it belonged to Rebecca, but he was holding it for her, he always told her he appreciated when she was polite about it, but he never enforced it, but if it was something she wanted and it was not hers yet, he did often ask her to say please.

Thus, she was saying "please" about the same time he was putting the dinosaur in her hands, which made him smile.

"Everyone appreciates a polite person," he told her to encourage this while not telling her directly that she must always be polite.  He figured her mother must have already driven that home with her, or she wouldn't have remembered to say it even after the fact.

Tom thought the little one seemed a little squirrely, so he decided to pick her up so that whatever was causing her anxiety or excitement wouldn't cause her to just run randomly and they get separated.

"Sorry," he told her. "I should have asked you first, but I got a little spooked, so I picked you up.  I hope that's okay."

He kissed the side of her face.

 

Rebecca smiled.  "Oh, okay!"

She walked towards the front of the line to the house of mirrors, and she smiled at her mom.  "I bet there's a mirror in there that will make me have your shape," she smiled at her mom, not that she was being rude, but rather, just a curious child that liked to imagine what her mom's shape would feel like if she could stretch that way for real.  She wasn't calling her mom fat at all, as matter of fact, she never really took the time to notice if her mom was normal, heavy, or light compared to anyone else.  She wasn't even yet, comparing her own weight, though she did find little blemishes wrong with her body that were less than perfect at times.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lani nodded and clutched her dragon close to her chest. “Mommy says manners are really important. Nobody likes a bratty girl.” She parroted back to Tom.

She jumped and yelped a bit when he picked her up, having not expected it since she was so focused. She didn’t mind it though. She was really starting to enjoy when Tom carried her around. None of that stopped her from squirming though. While she hadn’t really ever stopped since arriving, she certainly was squirming more than usual.

When they approached the carrousel, she eyed it a little nervously. “It’s so big.” She said softly, very shocked by the sight. “The grocery store one is small!” Her tone wasn’t clear if she was excited or anxious about this fact.

 

Charlotte knew that Rebecca didn’t mean any harm by the comment. She wasn’t bothered by it but she did worry if she said things like that to other people.

“Honey, it’s not very nice to say things like that. It’s not nice to make comments about somebody’s body or size.” She said gently. Her tone was kind and informative rather than scolding or correcting. She always did her best to raise her daughter to be kind and compassionate.

“Do you want to go in alone and have me wait out here? Or I can come with you.” She said with a smile, showing Rebecca she wasn’t upset in the slightest.