Problem

[Windelbaby]

I have a problem that is negatively affecting my life. It has something to do with diapers I really hope that someone can help me. But I better start from the beginning and indeed I had a girlfriend a few years ago I met her on the Internet she lives not far from me stupidly I had the idea to tell her about my diaper fetish at the beginning of the relationship. Actually, I also had no problem with it in the time where we were still together and after the separation initially also not.

Now we come to the problem is that I am afraid that she continues to tell, I do not know if she does or would do it, we have no more contact. But I would also like to have a relationship again and would also like to try it again on the platform where I met my ex. However, I am afraid that she has told others or possibly also told. I am afraid that someone else will confront me with it and that I won't find a girlfriend anymore.

I know that it does not have to be so I also have no problem with my fetish etc. because I know that you can not get rid of a fetish even if you want it. I would also never mention something like that right at the beginning of my relationship because I realize how it affects my life. I don't know maybe I am a bit paranoid in that respect.

I would be interested if you know such a feeling? Or if a friend or an acquaintance or a relative has told others about it or if it happened because of a quarrel? If so, how did you deal with it, did you not care or did it cause you problems or was it only half as bad as you feared?

[Alyeskabird]

Where it is generaly best to talk about the whole abdl thing early on in a relationship, spec if its important to you, it does have the downside of you maybe getting cought out and exposed by your partner if at any time you seperate from them, even if its just drifting away. Women tend to burn old relationships, men tend to pack them away in a closet and keep them as reminders of things that had been plesent in the relationship. This is in part based on biological imperatives, and just something that happens. Still, at this point you do not know if she has done anything to 'expose' you.  If she does, it will be more on her, than on you, and if it does come up, in a way, she is doing you a favor, though a rather backhanded one. You are allready filtering people based on abdl stuff, if only to make sure they are not haters and will not freak out when it comes up at some point. Go ahead and look and see, test the waters, see what happens. For all you know she has told them, and there are people that are also interested, and that little tidbit will incurage there interest in you. Or it will filter them away from you, and I expect that you would not want to end up with someone who is against abdl. Its diferent than my siduation, I have never dated, not once in over 50 years of living, never had a romance, never fell in love.

[Windelbaby]

On 3/20/2023 at 3:26 PM, Alyeskabird said:

Where it is generaly best to talk about the whole abdl thing early on in a relationship, spec if its important to you, it does have the downside of you maybe getting cought out and exposed by your partner if at any time you seperate from them, even if its just drifting away. Women tend to burn old relationships, men tend to pack them away in a closet and keep them as reminders of things that had been plesent in the relationship. This is in part based on biological imperatives, and just something that happens. Still, at this point you do not know if she has done anything to 'expose' you.  If she does, it will be more on her, than on you, and if it does come up, in a way, she is doing you a favor, though a rather backhanded one. You are allready filtering people based on abdl stuff, if only to make sure they are not haters and will not freak out when it comes up at some point. Go ahead and look and see, test the waters, see what happens. For all you know she has told them, and there are people that are also interested, and that little tidbit will incurage there interest in you. Or it will filter them away from you, and I expect that you would not want to end up with someone who is against abdl. Its diferent than my siduation, I have never dated, not once in over 50 years of living, never had a romance, never fell in love.

First of all, thank you very much for your answer. I understand what you want to tell me but I'm still a little afraid of it when she tells of course it would be advantageous if I meet someone who has nothing against ABDL. However, I would like to choose the people I trust with it. Here where I live there are not many tolerant people. I mean, I also know that it is almost impossible to find out if she has done it, that's why I asked if anyone has had any experience. Thank you for the answer. I hope that it was your personal decision not to fall in love.

[Alyeskabird]

Just experence, seen so many people have problems,  soo many that try and hide it. Sometimes its doable, depending mostly on if they can turn away from abdl totaly or not, there seems to ber allmost no inbetween states.

Sadly the whole abdl thing tends to be something that is very polerizing, unlike things like bdsm wich at lest has tact social aproval.

[Windelbaby]

23 minutes ago, Alyeskabird said:

Just experence, seen so many people have problems,  soo many that try and hide it. Sometimes its doable, depending mostly on if they can turn away from abdl totaly or not, there seems to ber allmost no inbetween states.

Sadly the whole abdl thing tends to be something that is very polerizing, unlike things like bdsm wich at lest has tact social aproval.

Yes, BDSM is now accepted by the masses, although it was also a long way to go. Who knows if in the future it can not be better for ABDL I think that acceptance builds up over time but here it is probably much more difficult and will take much longer.

[Alyeskabird]

Yah for some reason people just flip out over abdl, never mind that even before things like bdsm was excepted, it did not get the amount of hate that is layered on abdl.