Amelia by WidowMaker

[diaperkid1989]

Amelia 19 avian white wings with green tips incontinent from birth brown hair green eyes 5 feet 9 inches tall. 130 pounds

 

It was a lovely day outside with temperature a nice warm 93 degrees and low humidity. It was a perfect day to fly and get away from all the stress in my life for a few hours. I always find that flying brings me peace and helps my mind sort out the the things that are bothering me. Today was no exception to that and when I finally banked around for one turn I had pretty well figured out what I needed was to just get the hell out of this town and start over somewhere else.

 

Returning to my small apartment and seeing all the traffic on the ground made me glad I had wings and could fly at will. Once the apartment came into view I cut my speed down and finally landed right in front of the building where several people were waiting for me to return. I hate days like this and wondered why I ever decided it was better to reveal my wings instead of hiding them and flying in secret.

 

“Freak! Whore spawn of Satan! Slut! Burn in Hell demon!” I hate that a bunch of religious idiots were always camped out on my doorstep just waiting for me to show up so they could throw things at me and call out insults to me. The leader of this group hated anyone different and was someone I would love to be able to legally get away with beating to a bloody pulp. The man was smart enough to never get in my face though and always left that up to his idiot patrol as I called them.

 

Two of them stepped out in front of me with their bibles and started waving them in my face. They were between me and my apartment where I wanted to get into before my diaper leaked. “Gentlemen, you are blocking me from entering my apartment. Please move so I can get inside.” “Not this time bitch. Get her!”

 

I tossed the guy on my left about 20 feet and kicked the other one on my right as hard as I could. He went flying back in pain and did not get back up again. I should have looked behind me but I am not a person used to fighting. The bat hit me in the head and I fell to my knees in blinding pain. What happened next is not clear. Blood was running down my face into my eyes as I lashed out at anyone I could barely make out. Unlike the last time there was no holding back and I meant to kill or severely injure anyone attempting to grab me.

 

After what seemed an eternity of pain, and more hits, darkness finally claimed me. I could feel I was moving but was strapped down at the same time. There were voices but they were muffled and seemed a long ways off. There were other noises but my mind was having trouble identifying them as the darkness pulled me under once more.

 

A police officer came around and saw the first swing of the bat at the side of the girl's head as she kicked one guy in front of her trying to stab her with a knife. The girl began hitting anyone getting close to her as the officer called for backup and for an ambulance. Within a minute two more units arrived as the girl was stabbed one more time before she threw the guy so hard into the side of a house that his head literally splattered upon impact.

 

The girl tried to stand but finally collapsed as the officers came running in to render what help they could. Almost everyone involved in the attack on the girl was out cold with two of them confirmed as dead at the scene. “Dispatch. This unit fifteen. We need additional ambulances at 1523 Crescent Drive. We have multiple individuals with critical injuries and at least one dead body as well. Be advised that one of the victims is an avian and the target of the assault.” “Understood. Sending additional units now.”

 

The ambulance crews arrived and started working on those who were still alive. The girl with the wings was a mess of bloody wounds. It took the crew almost ten minutes at the scene to get her bandaged up and ready for transport to the nearest hospital. It was a miracle that they had not broken her wings as far as the ambulance and police officers were concerned.

 

She was barely awake as they strapped her carefully to a gurney and was unresponsive to questions from anyone. Once inside the ambulance it was a hectic ride through town to the hospital. “Regional this is Medic three. We are in route with a female victim. Victim is an avian of roughly 18 to 20 years of age. We have four stab wounds and numerous blunt trauma wounds as well. Pulse is erratic and unstable. Hearts are beating out of normal rhythm and left lung is collapsed.

 

It took the crew almost 20 minutes to reach the hospital with me from I was told. I almost died on them twice during emergency surgery. The wounds left me in a coma for a week. I had 142 stitches from the stab wounds I had received. By the time I woke up I felt like tank had rolled over me or used me for target practice. I ached everywhere but was relieved to find my wings unbroken and only lightly bruised.

 

The doctor deemed me stable enough to talk to an officer the next day and tell my side of the story. After taking my statement he smiled at me. “Your statement is just a formality ma'am. The officer that called in the attack on you caught all of it on his car's camera as he tried to get through the mob and to you. You gave them a beating they wont soon forget. This is one time they found a victim that was able to give them a beating in return.”

 

The hospital nurses were nice to me and never once complained when I had to get my diaper changed. The beating left me in the hospital for eight weeks before I was released to go home. The flight back to my place left me physically exhausted but was much needed by me. Once inside the apartment with the door shut I let out a sigh of relief to be home. A quick change of my wet diaper and a glass of water to wash down my pain medicine with and I was back in bed and asleep again.

 

I spent the next three weeks sleeping and healing as I waited for the court date. The survivors were trying to claim that I attacked them first and had been the one trying to kill all of them. They were not guilty of anything but defending themselves from my sudden and unprovoked attack according to their high priced lawyer. I was a cold blooded murderer according to the lawyer in his opening statements and had intentionally killed three of them before the police finally stopped me.

 

I had to have a recess of ten minutes when I found out I had killed three of them in the attack on me. I broke down in sobs and it took a few minutes to get myself under control again. I am not a cold blooded murderer and had not meant to kill anyone. The police video was played and a long list of the injuries I had received was admitted as evidence as well. Numerous photographs had been taken of me laying in the hospital bed in a coma as evidence as well.

 

The jury wasted very little time in declaring me not guilty by reason of self defense to avoid being murdered. Several family members of the mob wanted to see me strung up by a rope and hanged for my actions. While the jury went over all of the evidence one more time in deliberation I had a guard outside the restroom while I changed my wet diaper.

 

With that taken care of I walked slowly back into the courtroom and sat back down quietly. A number of the family members had to be removed from the courtroom for their rude remarks towards me as I quietly hung my head in shame over my actions where I had accidentally killed three of my attackers. The jury returned after 45 minutes with the not guilty verdict for me. Those involved in the attack on me were investigated and charged with attempted murder and with a hate crime. None of them walked out free and they are all in jail for at least the next 25 years of their life.

 

I was awarded compensation for my injuries I had sustained in the attack on me. The judge had awarded me almost five million dollars since my medical expenses were so high. I used part of this money to see a counselor for the nightmares I had for a time about the attack and the three I had killed defending myself. One thing that helped me to heal was when the mother of one of the boys I had killed found me and asked to speak politely with me.

 

I almost said no but decided to chance it as she seemed sincere. We met at a local park with lots of open space in case I needed to fly away fast. “You do not need to blame yourself miss. Charles fell in with a bad crowd a number of years ago and has been in and out of court numerous times. I don't know what kind of hold that fake preacher had on him to make him behave so badly as to try to kill you, but you only acted in self defense. Had you not hit him he would have kept on stabbing you and eventually killed you. You did nothing wrong honey. I'm not angry with you. You are a victim of a terrible attack and it is only by a thin thread that you lived and recovered, so don't blame yourself for what happened.”

 

She hugged me and left me with something to think about as I flew home. It took a few days to decide on what to do but once my mind hit upon an idea that sounded good I wasted no time in following through. College would be a good idea. It would give me an education I had always wanted and a chance to start over again where no one knew me. This time things would be different though. This time they would not know about my wings.

 

The incontinence I was not worried about as it is more easily accepted than having wings and the ability to fly is. A degree in art might be fun but not very profitable. Searching through the various fields took some time for before finally hitting on a field of work that would be profitable. Computers were the big thing right now but not a good field for me to study. While I admit I loved music I had no talent whatsoever for it so that ruled that out.

 

I looked at computers one more time then decided I had no real chance of understanding them enough to work in that field let alone get a degree. Physics was dull and boring to me as it was too easy, so that was not going to work either. Then I hit on the idea of maybe being a mechanic. I had always loved to tinker around with things so maybe a mechanic or perhaps a mechanical engineer would work for me.

 

In the end I settled on the idea of going to school for automotive and diesel mechanics. Everyone needed someone to fix their cars so it was a good choice for me. The next question was just exactly where to go for the education. All the automotive courses were out of state which suited me fine as I was wanting to get out of here and away from the idiots and racist assholes in this town.

 

My timing was not very good and the only courses that were available to me were part time courses. To help pass the time I decided to sign up for some part time college courses studying art. I have not done much drawing or painting in a while since money was tight, but now I could get back into it again. I just hope they don't ask questions about race in the admittance forms. I'd rather they not know about my wings.

 

I have no problems admitting I am incontinent but after this last run in with the idiots I would prefer to keep the wings a secret at least for now if not forever. After a bit of searching I finally found the forms needed to fill out on line and send in to the schools. The automotive school did not ask for my race but the college did. There was a moment of hesitation before filling out the form and admitting to being an avian. This made me nervous and got me to wondering if this would see my application get rejected.

 

There was nothing to do but wait for the rejection notice that was most certainly going to come from the college and to hope that the technical school did not also reject my application. I also had to provide detailed medical records to the college and agree to a background check as well from both schools. This was yet another reason to expect them to reject my applications. Not only am I an avian but the medical files listed substantial injuries attained in the assault upon me.

 

There were also the legal documents from the court case as well that showed I had involuntarily killed three others while trying to defend myself during the assault on me. This would not look good on my entry application when they reviewed it and almost certainly get me rejected by one, or most likely, both schools.

 

With nothing else to do but wait I decided to sleep a little and then go out flying when it was dark out so fewer people would see me. Since the trial I spent most of my time avoiding everyone and staying inside no matter how tempting it was to go flying for a while. I changed into a dry diaper and shut down my laptop before going to my bed to get some sleep.

 

I had not meant to sleep the entire day and all night but that is what happened to me. When I woke up I felt refreshed from the sleep. A quick change and I fired up my laptop again. It was a big surprise to find that both schools had accepted my applications for school. Without hesitation I sent the tuition money in and waited for further details from them.

 

An e-mail came in the next day with details about my chosen courses, housing, tools and books needed for the courses. There were forms to fill out for housing and a list of apartments near the college and the technical school if I chose to rent out an apartment instead of staying in the dorms. A dorm room is a good idea financially, but the are cramped and have almost no privacy.

 

An apartment was another option that was appealing to me, but there again was the matter of how much one would cost me. With the money in my account it would be easy to afford one but I did not want to go crazy and burn through all of the money. Making the money last and work for me was high on my list of priorities. Still as tempting as saving money and staying in the dorms might be, there were two very big things to keep concealed as much as possible.

 

My incontinence was something that would be embarrassing if publicly known and then there was the matter of my wings. After having been assaulted because of them I wanted to keep them a secret as long as possible. Another attack on me was not something I wanted to have happen to me if it could be avoided. It was with this in mind that numerous calls were made to apartments and private land lords with no luck. It seemed that everything was already taken and that my only choice was to get a dorm room.

 

It was frustrating but there was not much else to be done with my limited resources. Not being in that town made finding any possible apartment difficult since there was no way for me to know what kind of places were available, the size and condition of these places, and the price as well as the neighborhood. It would not be a good idea for me to get a place and then find out when it was too late that the place was in a neighborhood full of crack houses or that it had frequent drive by shootings.

 

It was with this in mind that my application for a private dorm room was submitted along with the extra fee for a private room. It was almost twice as much as a regular two person dorm room but worth it considering all that had happened to me lately. There were still hate letters mailed to me daily and various hate groups protesting almost daily outside my apartment complex. They knew better than to try to get physical with me but they still insulted me constantly.

 

It has gotten to the point I hate to leave my apartment. Flying is the biggest thing that keeps me from going crazy and giving in to depression at times. Still it is depressing that they hate me simply because I am different than they are. It makes me wonder why there is so much hate in this world these days. Why do we hate anyone who is different than us?

 

A quick diaper change and it was time to get some flying time in before the idiots figured out a way to stop me from even doing this. So far they have not tried to shoot me out of the sky but it is only a matter of time before someone gets the stupid idea of trying some target practice with me as the flying target. It was definitely time to leave this town and all of the racist assholes behind.

 

As soon as I stepped outside the apartment they were calling out insults to me and threatening to kill me for whatever stupid reason they could think of with their limited intelligence. A rock was thrown at me and barely missed me as my wings fanned all the way out in preparation for flying. The rock only served to make me frustrated as they vanished rapidly beneath me as my wings helped to carry me high up into the sky and out of their reach for the time being.

 

Being in the air for a good five hours calmed me down quite a bit, but still, they would be waiting for me when my flight brought me back to the apartment complex. It made me wish there was a way for me to turn invisible or at least distract their attention long enough for me to land and get inside quietly. After a couple of tight turns to drop speed it was finally time to land and change or risk leaking.

 

It was strange landing and not seeing any of them protesting outside my apartment complex and hurling insults at me. This was a pleasant change but it made me worry what they were up to and why they were strangely silent and absent for a change. This was why when the door to my apartment was found open a crack that my paranoia rose a thousand percent in an instant. Letting my eyes adjust to the low light took a few minutes but was worth it.

 

Just inside was a trip line strung across the door way and rigged tight against the door at just about a half inch above the floor. It was not meant to trip me but it made me wonder what the hell they had done to my apartment. I'm no expert on traps and never will be, but the police have people that know how to deal with this stuff safely and carefully. A quick phone call to the police brought a special unit over to the apartment complex real fast.

 

Everyone in the building was evacuated for safety and they went to work with a set of small flying drones inside my apartment. The trip line led to a nasty surprise waiting for me to come home and trigger it. They had rigged shotgun to go off when the line was tripped. Another even nastier surprise waited in my bathroom. The bastards had rigged an explosive charge with dynamite in case the shotgun failed to get me. Another charge was found under my bed with a pressure detonator on it as well so if a person laid down it would be their last nap ever.

 

It took the bomb squad about two hours to go through my place and undo every single explosive and gun trap they had rigged to kill me. The worst trap of all was hidden in my bag of diapers. They had rigged it to blow Anthrax in dust form into my face when I went to change. For this one they called in the C.D.C. and reported it to the FBI as well since it was now way beyond a hate crime and and attempted murder. They had now gotten themselves charged with terrorism for this stunt. After everything of mine was carefully examined they let me in to grab my laptop, some spare clothes and my hidden cache of emergency money I had hidden in a bag in my closet.

 

My car was examined as well with a fine eye for detail and found to be rigged with almost 200 pounds of C-4 explosives. With nowhere to stay for the night I decided to make a quick stop at the local drugstore for more diapers then find a room in one of the surrounding towns for a few days until a replacement car could be found for the one that the assholes had wrecked when rigging it to blow up when started.

 

It took me three days to find another car that would get me out of town and to the college where I would with luck not be found by the hate groups that seemed to all but run this town. My application for a private dorm room had been accepted and they had given me instructions on how to get my card key for the building and the dorm room. They included a detailed map of the campus and another detailed street map of the town as well.

 

With most of my things having to be taken away thanks to the assholes that tried to kill me I had nothing much to pack. I had few specialty shirts they had declared as clean and a pair of shoes. The rest of my clothes had been contaminated and had to be confiscated and taken to somewhere safe. All I had for other possessions were the clothes on my back and my laptop computer. With my few belongings sitting in the car with me I drove off towards the place where I hoped to begin my education and to start over fresh where no one knew me.

 

The drive to the college would take me a good ten hours but it would be worth it to leave this place far behind forever. Before I got too close to the college town I would find a secluded place to fly one last time then finally land and hide my wings so that they would never know about them. This time would be different as no one would know about me being a freak with wings.

 

I was about 70 miles away from the town when I pulled off onto a deserted side road and parked near an old abandoned church in the middle of nowhere. It was the middle of the night and daybreak was a good three hours off yet. I looked around carefully before getting out of the car and locking the doors. I carried a spare diaper inside the old church with me and took care of that issue before it leaked anymore.

 

With the diaper change taken care of it was time for one last flight before arriving in the college town. A last look at the old church confirmed that it would be a place to visit in the daylight with some art supplies, but for now, it was time for me to take to the sky one last time before I had to land and hide my wings.

 

The flight took me close to the college town and it was tempting to fly over it for a look but the fear of being seen and hurt outweighed my curiosity by a wide margin so with a sharp banking turn my course was corrected to bring me back towards my car where the wings would be carefully concealed beneath a shirt so no one would see them and seek to hurt or even kill me because of them.

 

Once on the ground again it was time to tuck my wings in and hide them before going to the school. This time no one would know I was anything other than another face in the crowd. There would be nothing to make me stand out in any way from the rest of the crowd. My entire presence at the schools would be one of just another student in a sea of students so that no one would have a reason to hate me for being different than them. They would not even know about my need for diapers and this would hopefully let me get through my studies without problems. It was sad that everyone hated avians so much and wanted to kill all of us, but that is the price a person pays for being different. The price for being a freak.

 

My body was screaming at me that it needed sleep before trying to drive the last bit of distance to the school so with this as the case I went back inside the small church and found a quiet place to sleep in the choir loft where no one would see me sleeping. The car was locked and the chances of anyone finding me here were very slim. Once I found a comfortable enough spot I laid down and went to sleep.

 

The sunlight finally woke me up several hours later as it filtered through the stained glass windows of the tiny church that had been my night time refuge and hiding place from the world. My body felt stiff and slightly sore as I stretched out my wings and stood up. The diaper between my legs hung low and was in dire need of removal and replacement with a clean one before much anything else was done by me.

 

The sunlight revealed a set of stairs leading down to the main floor of the church but since no one was around to see me it was simpler and easier to just fly down to the main floor then walk out to my car for a clean diaper and another shirt. No one would ever know that a freak like me had ever been here. No one would call me names and accuse me of defiling a holy place with my very existence. Once the change of my diaper and shirt were complete it was time to leave.

 

The wings were tucked under my shirt and carefully concealed. This was not the most comfortable but it was the safest thing for me to do. It almost made me wish to be normal and not a freak with huge wings. For perhaps the millionth time it made me wonder why the world hated us all so much. Why they felt so threatened by us that they had to kill us. It made no logical sense to me but then again these things never do.

 

After a final look around the beautiful old church it was time to get on the road and begin my life of hiding while learning automotive mechanics and studying art as well. The final drive to the college campus took me about two hours thanks to a couple of wrong turns. After finally arriving and finding a parking spot for my car I made my way around the campus until the administrative office building was found.

 

The building was laid out in a very efficient manner and this made it easy to find the area that I needed to be in to get everything. After a 25 minute wait they gave me my room key and the introductory packet for new students. They issued me a parking permit as well so that my car could be parked in the lot close to the dorm building they had me in for the year. Once everything was said and done they had one final set of instructions specifically for me.

 

The school had a small medical center and they wanted me to report for a quick checkup to make sure everything had healed without problems. That made sense to me but letting them see my wings made me nervous. Still, it had to be done so with no way out of it I reported to the medical clinic. The only things I took with me were a spare diaper concealed in a fanny pack and a DVD with all my medical files on it.

 

Once inside the building they had me fill out a brief two page questionnaire that did not ask about my wings. That was a relief as I had them tucked under my shirt and so far no one had looked at me strangely even once. After what seemed an eternity they finally called my name to be seen. The nursing assistant led me to a good sized exam room and let me know that the doctor would be in to see me in a minute. It was tempting to stretch my wings out for a minute but there was a reason they were hidden and it was better this way.

 

The door opened a minute later and the doctor walked in looking over my chart. “Amelia Reid?” “Yes ma'am.” I see on your medical form you checked off avian. I'd like to see your wings please.” When she noticed my hesitation she spoke up again. “No one else knows and I wont tell anyone, but you do need need to let me examine them real fast.” With a sigh I lifted my shirt up and fanned them out all the way as I stretched them out to relieve the cramps I felt in them.

 

The lady was very professional and gentle as she examined my wings. “They look good to me but why hide them?” “I have my reasons ma'am. I do not want another incident so it is better this way ma'am.” “I see numerous recent scars. What happened?” “A group of individuals tried to kill me and almost did. The details of all my medical records are on this DVD disc ma'am.

 

The admissions details I received asked for me to bring a copy of all my medical files with me so here they are on a single DVD disc ma'am.” she accepted the disc then left the room for a minute with the disc. She returned with a laptop computer. She used the laptop to pull up all my records and began to scan through them quickly. Everything went smoothly until she got to my recent history.

 

She turned a little pale for a moment when she read the laundry list of injuries and saw the pictures included. “They did a real number on you. Did the counseling help or do you still have nightmares?” The nightmares are still there but not nearly as often as they were at first.” “Good to hear. You are not the first avian we have had on this campus. We had a gentleman here a few years ago at the height of the government hunt and we took damned good care of him.

 

I have extensive medical knowledge of avians from putting him back together again after he crashed and almost died. It's all public record now but don't feel you have to keep your wings hidden from the world. Not everyone hates avians. I see from your records you are also incontinent. Any problems outside of the normal issues from that at the moment?” “No ma'am. My incontinence is managed by diapers and careful cleaning when I change so no rashes or infections.”

 

“Okay then. Sounds like you are all set to go then. You can get dressed then. You can come here any time you need to and no one will know about what we discuss. All my files are kept under lock and key at all times and it would take a federal court order to get them unlocked by anyone else except in an extreme emergency. I take privacy very seriously so you need not worry about anyone finding anything out from me.”

 

“Thank you ma'am.” With the exam over and no need to let the world know about me being a freak my wings were folded tightly against me body as the shirt was pulled down and over them to conceal them from the world. I left the clinic a little nervously but found my dorm room easily enough. Once inside the dorm room I made short work of carefully checking for any peepholes or tiny cameras that could be used to spy on anyone.

 

The last thing that was done to make sure no one looked in was to close the blinds completely then go into the bathroom to change before my diaper leaked. I reached for the tapes and felt a familiar sensation in my lower back as hot mud filled the diaper and made a nasty smell. It was a good thing the vent fan was strong and the shower was big.

 

The diaper was rolled up and tossed into a plastic bag before being dropped into the wastebasket for later disposal. Once this was taken care of then it was into the shower to clean up before putting a fresh diaper on. The only good thing so far was that no one knew about me being incontinent or having wings, except for the doctor at the clinic. Had there been a way to avoid her knowing then she would not even know.

 

After settling in it was time to get to the bookstore for the books that would be needed for the courses and then to the nearest tool store for my automotive tools as well. On the way in I had located the technical school easily enough. It was a block away from my dorm on the back side of the campus and was actually a division of the college. This made it so much easier on me to get to and from classes.

The books were not too bad and only cost me around $60.00 each on average since they were used.

 

The bookstore was crowded with students looking for the books they needed and it felt almost claustrophobic with how many others were in the store at the same time getting books. When all my books were paid for finally it came to a mere $342.00 plus pocket change. Why are college books so damned expensive

 

My books for my automotive course were just about as bad and that ran me another $367.00 for those. A quick search on the Internet found a discount tool outlet not far away. It took me 20 minutes to find my way to the tool outlet store. My list of tools needed was quickly filled to the tune of another $1780.00plus another $500.00 for the tool chest to keep them in. My art supplies were the least expensive and only cost me about $120.00 when it was all said and done.

 

Buying books, tools, and art supplies had taken most of the day and cost me a small fortune. The car seemed heavier as I drove back to my dorm building to unload everything into my dorm room. Unloading everything took me almost 20 minutes. My room was on the fourth floor and it made me glad to have such a high level of strength as I had to carry almost 200 pounds worth of tools, books, and art supplies up to my room and then return for my modular tool chest next.

 

A few students seemed shocked as they saw me carrying so much up the four flights of stairs with ease, but no one said anything. This was a minor mistake and it made me remember to be more careful in the future about letting anyone see my high strength. To blend in with everyone they would have to not know that there was anything outside the normal about me. Being found out would be dangerous and most likely fatal to me.

 

 

The first day of college went by without anyone suspecting me of being a freak and it was a relief to know I could pull it off if my wings were kept hidden and and nothing about me stood out in any way. Being just another nameless face in the crowd was all I was after while going to school here. The next day would bring another test as it would be time for my automotive courses to begin. If no one there was given any reason to think of me as freak then perhaps it might be safe for me as long as my wings were kept hidden under my clothes when in public. Only time would tell.

 

By the end of the first week of school it was insane the amount of homework they had assigned. A normal student might be able to get half of it done in the weekend they gave us, but with me taking the automotive course as well it was a mountain of work to wade through. It took a lot of forcing myself to stay focused and a lot of caffeine to get the work done correctly and ready to be turned in on Monday to the professors.

 

The work was grueling and my wings felt like they had not been stretched out in months. By the end of half a day of classes my diaper would be drenched almost to the point of leaking. It was a pleasant surprise to see another adult diaper in the trash can when it came time for me to change. Knowing that there was at least one other person on campus stuck in diapers eased my fear a little. My own wet diaper soon joined the other one in the trash pile with no one the wiser who it had been leaving them behind.

 

My need to fly was overwhelming and my constant staring at the sky while going from building to building was hard to stop. It was way too risky to fly in the daylight so when the clock on my desk read 2:03 am it was time to sneak out for some flying time that was much needed by me to keep my wings from getting too stiff and to help ease my stress levels. For me, flying is essential. I need to fly frequently just like my diapers need to be changed frequently. Both are necessities for me.

 

A quick change of shirts and a diaper change later found me quietly taking to the air for some much needed flying time. It felt great to be in the clouds again where the stress seemed to roll off of me as the wind flowed through my wing feathers while the ground passed beneath me during my flight. It is times like this that it is nice to be able to fly and get away from the world even if only for a few hours.

 

All to soon the sagging diaper between my legs reminded me that it was time to go back into hiding again even though the temptation to not hide my wings was there. It was still far better for me to stay invisible and just blend in quietly with the other numerous students going to school. Blending in is no fun, but it keeps me alive. If it became public knowledge the an avian was going to school they would hunt me down and take great delight in killing me.

 

The only way that made me stand out was in my grades for my classes. My grades were very good and among the top of the class. There were a lot of parties and other activities going on but they were for normal people and not for freaks such as myself. A bunch of guys drinking beer and trying to get a girl to have sex with them was not my idea of keeping a low profile. My social status outside of classes was that of a ghost.

 

Few ever saw me outside of my classes and it was better this way. The loneliness is something that drives a lot of others crazy and it has a mild affect on me as well, but staying alone and invisible keeps me alive and healthy. My late night flights are always at random times and never in the same direction two nights in a row. The average altitude for my flights makes it nearly impossible to spot me as well with me flying at around 2000 feet and not coming down lower until it is time to land. This has worked out quite well for me so far.

 

While no one seems to notice me, that does not mean that I don't listen to the various rumors circulating the campus or the classes. So far there have been no reports of anyone seeing me flying at night and none of my feathers have been found by anyone either as far as I know of. Even my artwork carefully avoids any kind of avians or birds. This kind of caution keeps me safe and well aware of any unusual sightings that might give me away.

End part one

 

part two

By the end of four weeks of school one of my art professors wants us each to find an old building somewhere and do a series of pencil drawings, chalk drawings and one painting in either oil or watercolor. With this in mind and having the entire weekend to do the assignment it was going to be a relaxing time doing something enjoyable that did not require me to be careful of exposing my wings publicly. The old church was a perfect place for me and it was a short drive away from here.

 

Unfortunately my car would be going nowhere as some drunken fool had totaled it by running into it with a truck while trying to do a burnout in the parking lot. He lost control of his vehicle and slammed into the back end of mine at almost 50 miles an hour. My insurance company received the report and agreed that the accident was in no way my fault. The idiot in the truck was forced to pay for the car to be towed and then had to get his insurance company involved. They were not happy with him but agreed that the incident was in no way my fault. It would be three weeks before they sent a check to cover the cost of the car so until then my only option was to walk or get a ride.

 

The third option was the one that no one suspected. It was almost 2:00 am on Friday night when my my bag full of art supplies, a couple of spare diapers and other things left the ground with me on my way to the church. No one was around that could see me as I took flight under my own power and began my trek to the church about two hours flight time from the school.

 

Once at the little church I circled around a few times while scanning the surrounding area for any signs of people that might possibly see me landing. With no one in sight it was a simple matter of flaring my wings out to cut my speed down and finally come in slow for a landing. It had felt good to fly all the way under my own power and not have to worry about hiding my wings.

 

It was still dark with the sunrise about 45 minutes away yet so with this in mind I spent time exploring the area on foot for a bit before going inside and then flying back up to the hiding place in the old choir loft. Once there I simply unrolled my sleeping bag and then set my art supplies off to one side where they would not be hit by me if I tossed and turned in my sleep.

 

It was a few hours later that the sunlight woke me up once more. After rolling up my sleeping bag it was time to clean up the mud filled diaper taped around my waist. It was a good thing that plenty of diaper wipes had been packed as it took a few minutes to get the mess wiped off of me before putting a clean diaper on. Disposing of the old one was simple for me to do. I simply took it outside and looked around a minute before flying up about 200 feet and throwing it as hard as I could in a random direction.

 

I loved this little church in the middle of nowhere. Something about this place felt peaceful and put me at ease as I drew several sketches of the interior and the outside. I did a couple of color chalk drawings of the church from the outside at different angles followed finally by a set of paintings. I did one in watercolor of the inside with the sunlight streaming through the lovely stained glass windows.

 

The last painting I did was from the outside of the building and it was done in oil paint as the sun was setting behind it and illuminating the whole structure. I have never painted this fast and easily before. It seemed like something wanted me to paint this place. It was a bit spooky to be able to paint this way but nevertheless it happened smoothly and effortlessly.

 

With the painting done it was set inside to dry more without being exposed to the elements. My art supplies were picked up and put into the small bag that also held my spare diapers and changing supplies. After packing up everything then my next chore was to simply change my diaper again that was threatening to leak. This one was disposed of the same way as the last one. It made me chuckle a little to think of where my used diaper landed.

 

It would be a bit gross to have it happen to me but it would be a bit funny to see the look on someones face if it at least landed on the ground in front of them out of the clear blue sky with no one around that had thrown it. Even funnier is if it would have hit some racist idiot in the side of the head or dead center in the face as they opened their mouth to insult someone because they had different skin color or religious belief. It would be poetic justice that the very mouth they spout their shit would get filled with it when my messy diaper hit them. One can always wish for a miracle but it is not likely to ever happen no matter how much one might wish to have it happen.

 

I spent one last night at the church then when my watch woke me up at 2:00 am it was time to leave and go back to hiding again. This weekend at the church had been fun with no one around to judge me. There was no one to call me a freak or any other insults simply because of my wings and my need for diapers. It is enough to make me wish that the numerous racists would somehow just up and vanish.

 

After stretching and then changing my diaper it was time to get everything ready to go back to school. The watercolor painting was long since dry, but the oil painting still had a long ways to go before it would be fully dry so it was going to have to be carried carefully by me on my way back to the college and back to hiding my wings. Back to staying alone and blending in to avoid being hurt ever again. Back to being a ghost with no life outside of my classes.

 

With everything ready to go I took a last look around and swore to come back again as this was the most quiet and peaceful place. No one even came down the lonely stretch of dirt road that ended at this lovely little church in the middle of nowhere. It was one place that having wings did not matter. No one was around to care about my diapers or to insult me. No one to try to kill me or think of me as a freak.

 

When the campus finally came back in sight after almost two hours of flying it was getting to be almost sunrise. Soon there would be people filling the campus and going about their lives and unless I wanted to be seen then getting in and hiding my wings had better be done damned soon. It had been a wonderful time drawing and painting but all good things must come to an end. My first class of the day was in the automotive building learning more about working on big diesel engines. Fortunately the class did not start until 1:00 pm in the afternoon and only ran until 5:00 pm. This would allow me to get some sleep that my body needed.

 

Once on the ground it was a simple matter of changing shirts behind a building and hiding the wings so no one would see them. This was a routine that was never any fun and it depressed me that it was the only safe way to stay hidden and blend in. Standing out in a crowd gets you noticed and that leads to people getting curious about you and then checking up on you. Once they did that it would be all over for me as they would know my secret. After that the church groups and other hate groups would be all over me.

 

The dorm room was lonely with no one to share it with. There were a lot of nice looking guys in my various classes but there was no one for me to talk to as they could never be allowed to know about my wings. So far no one had even found out about my diapered state and it would be nice to keep it that way so no one had any reason to see me as anything other than another face in the crowd. As lonely and depressing as it might get, it was far better for me this way.

 

By the end of six weeks the courses were getting tougher and four students in my dorm had already quit and moved out. It was no surprise to me as much as they partied that they were failing and decided to quit. The entire time that I had been here not one person had talked to me outside of class. Not one person had tried to ask me to a party or for a date. My blending in had made me invisible outside of class as there was nothing about me to stand out in any way.

 

No matter how well I did in classes and how hard I worked to keep my grades up high there was something missing in my life. My paintings of the old church were on display in the art building and this should have made me proud, but instead it did nothing but remind me of just how empty my life really was. My rime outside of class was spent studying and doing homework. My assignments were turned in on time with high praise from my professors, but it was not enough.

 

It was tempting to talk to a counselor but the fewer people knowing about my wings then the better my chances of staying alive. Perhaps it would be alright to let them know though. It was lonely being invisible all the time and hiding from the world. My late night flights at night helped a little, but not enough. It was something to think about to be certain and not something to rush into.

 

Thinking about revealing myself over the next two weeks brought me to thinking that maybe things could be different here and it would okay to let them see me for what I really am. Surely not everyone in the world hates my kind. I had made a decision to show my wings and was going to do so the next day until my eyes fell on a local newspaper someone had dropped.

 

The front page article was about an avian that had been caught and killed by a group of religious fanatics about 30 miles away from here. They had tortured the poor boy for over three weeks straight before they finally killed him after cutting his wings off. They hung the boy from a tree after knocking him out and leaving his wings laying on the ground in front of his hanging body.

 

I turned pale and felt like I was going to be sick. How anyone could be so cruel was beyond me. This strengthened my resolve to not reveal my wings after all. Tears flowed down my face as I read the article the rest of the way. Due to a clerical error in the trial, all the murderers of the boy had to be set free and could not be prosecuted for their hate crime. It made me want to scream and lash out at everyone, someone, but it would do no good.

 

That night when it was dark outside I took to the sky once more with no real destination in mind until I found myself landing at the small church where the tears finally came flooding from my eyes to obscure my vision. “Why?! Why do you hate us God?! Why do you let them do this to us?! Why!?” Falling to my knees in absolute despair and pain I wanted to an answer but had received none. “Are you even listening to me God?! Do you even give a fuck?! What did we ever do to deserve this?!”

 

My lonely shouts were not answered by any divine voice or flashy miracles. My shouts were answered with only silence which only made me cry out more in despair. Finally after several more minutes of crying I stumbled inside and passed out on the floor in front of the altar. The world hated my kind for no logical reason and God let the murdering bastards go unpunished for their horrible crime.

 

How long it was before I felt the touch of a hand on my body I have no clue. “Child, god does not hate you. Your cries are not unheard. Even a blind old man like me can see that.” I woke with a start and jumped up into the air ready to fight for my life. Standing just a short ways off was an old man with a white cane and dark sunglasses. “So young and so full of pain. Come down and talk to old Benjamin. It is not often I receive visitors.”

 

After hovering for several minutes and debating if it was safe to run away I landed and tried to walk quietly past him. He simply smiled and gently grabbed my left wing. “A child with the wings of an angel and a heart so full of sorrow asking god why. Sit child and tell me what troubles you so that you would scream in such agony and despair.”

 

“You want to know what hurts? Life is a fucking lie. God does not exist! There is nothing good in this crap hole of a world. People are tortured and mutilated for fun simply because they are different! The bastards that do this go unpunished and are allowed to walk free without being punished! People laugh and ridicule others with health issues that they have no control of! We are forced to hide and become invisible to just survive from day to day.

 

Those of us who do not hide end up dead at the hands of racist scum! And you winder what the hell is hurting?! This whole fucking life is nothing but pain and despair! A 13 year old boy was abducted, tortured for three weeks then mutilated and hanged simply because he was different! The bastards that did it are free and no one is even doing anything about it! Kill a black person or a Jew or someone because they are from another country and you go to jail. Kill an avian and you go free no matter how horrible the crime was. Tell me where the hell is the justice in that?!”

 

Beat on someone and you go to jail. Beat me almost to death, try to poison or blow me up and does anyone even care? No! All because I'm an avian! Blind, stuck in a wheelchair, or even have to use crutches and they leave you alone. You have to wear fucking diapers and they treat you like a fucking war criminal! If God does exist then he is a sick fucking bastard! He rewards the evil and punishes the good! I didn't choose to born an avian and incontinent for life!

 

I have to hide and be invisible just to survive! Tell me where the greater good in that is?! I don't dare even try to date someone! My life is a lie! I don't even exist! Outside of my classes I am a fucking ghost!” “My dear child. Those who hurt that innocent boy will pay for their crimes in time but it is not up to you to decide their fate. God does not hate you child and never has. Come and talk to me some more. Let it all out instead of keeping it hidden inside. God forgives even when you say thing you do not mean while in pain.”

 

By the time time I finished talking to him I felt better and tired once more. I had skipped my classes today and had a break down. The pressure was getting to me and there was little that could be done about it at the moment unless I wanted to end up dead for being a freak. “Why don't you grab some sleep in the loft up there. I sometimes sleep up there myself and have some very comfortable blankets and pads laid out in the top row. Go sleep now and when you wake up then you can go home and things will feel better.”

 

I don;t know why I did what he asked but the need for sleep was overpowering so without thinking twice about him or the sudden bout of fatigue I let myself do exactly what he said. It was late in the night when I finally woke again. My diaper hung low and was leaking. Laying in front of me was my fanny pack with the spare emergency diaper I always take with me. I thought I had forgotten it but maybe I had just gotten so used to having it on I forgot I had it with me.

 

After changing my diaper and getting up it was time to go back to the school before daylight came to this part of the world. The flight back was easier and faster with a tailwind but that made landing trickier. Still, it had been nice to fly again after almost a week of not flying. Once on the ground it was a quick shuffling of the clothes to hide my wings again before going out into the lighted areas of the campus.

 

I crossed the campus and returned to my dorm room for more sleep before I had to get up and change my diaper again before going to my automotive classes in a few hours. The alarm finally woke me from my sleepless slumber. The room smelled horrible as my diaper had been messed in by me during the night and had plenty of time to stink up the room. Without waiting for anything else to go wrong I grabbed a clean diaper and got into the shower to get cleaned up. After getting into the shower and removing it carefully the smell from the mess made me almost gag.

 

The horrible mess was put into a plastic bag then left while I washed the horrible mess off of me. Once the mess was cleaned off of me and the shower finally rinsed clean I put on a fresh diaper. It was going to be one of those days when you wish you could stay in bed all day and wait for it to be over. Three steps later and the top right tape on the diaper tore off.

 

My bag of diapers was almost gone. There were three left and I would go through those by the end of the day. The last three diapers were put into my bag I carried with me so I could change as needed during the day. After this it was time to leave for my automotive class. After making sure that my wings were tucked in safely under my shirt I finally walked out into the hall and then out of the building to my classes.

 

No one said anything to me or stared at me as my trip across the campus was made silently and alone as always since my existence was carefully crafted to blend in and not stand out in any way. All around me were people talking to one another as they went about their business. Several couples kissed as they walked through the campus to various destinations. It served to remind me of just how lonely my existence is. No one noticed me. No one paid any attention to me as they passed by me.

 

The building for my automotive class was filled with other students coming and going as I walked inside to my automotive class. The teacher lectured for about 25 minutes then had us start working on a couple of engines to find a problem with them that he said would be tricky to find but easy to fix when found. The engine I was working on was not firing up for some reason and smelled heavily of gasoline.

 

It took me a few minutes to find that the distributor cap had been turned 90 degrees to the right. With the distributor reset to the correct alignment it was time to try to fire up the motor once more. One of the other students bumped into me and spilled something on me that I did not notice until it was way too late. The engine had too much fuel in it still and a blast of fire shot out the top of it for a second in a spectacular display.

 

I jumped back and almost took to the air at the same time I soaked my diaper. I was nervous as I walked back to the engine and began checking everything over carefully. After making sure that it was not going to catch fire then a close inspection found that the fuel mixture had been tampered with. Someone had also poured extra fuel into the intake of the engine as well in an effort to get it to start right away.

 

This set me back almost an hour but by the time this problem was fixed it was time to fire up the engine again. The engine turned over but had a heat issue. Coolant and oil levels were good so it took me time to narrow it down to a short in the wiring going to the sensor light. Everyone else was doing far better than me with their engines and were already relaxing and talking while my engine still needed more work.

 

By the end of the four hour class my engine was running perfectly with no problems. The oil and coolant had been changed. New wiring had been installed along with resetting the timing. The radiator had been cleaned out real fast as well and the oil radiator had been replaced as well. Doing this much work took me almost the entire alloted time as a couple of the other students laughed at me still working on the engine while they were done and chatting.

 

The teacher finally returned and checked each engine. Everyone had found their simple problems and fixed them quickly while the problems my engine had were not simple problems. “Amelia, this is not the engine you were supposed to work on. Who moved the engines around?” No one confessed as to who had switched the engines around. He finally turned back to focus his attention on the engine. After looking it over and then firing it up he smiled.

 

“You definitely did good work on this engine and found all the issues with it. This motor was out of one our work trucks and needed to be looked at. I did a quick inspection of it yesterday and it looks like we can drop it back in the truck tomorrow. You did good work in a very short amount of time. Since no ne wants to own up to switching out the engines that's fine. Everyone here gets docked 25 points for the day except for Amelia who will receive an extra 50 points.

 

If this ever happens again then a lot of you will fail this course. These engines are not to be messed with this way. Next time you are in here in three days we will be discussing diesel turbine engine systems.” The class was dismissed with an extra 125 pages of reading and a report on turbine systems in diesel engines due on when we came to class the next time.

 

It was a long day and left me feeling tired. Being the only girl in an automotive mechanics class was tough at times. All the guys were immature idiots a lot of times and several of them had slapped me on the ass when my attention was on an assignment or they were passing by and felt they could get away with it. So far none of them had discovered my diapers and no one seemed to suspect that I have wings.

 

Once back in the dorm room I made a quick stop in the bathroom to shower,and then change into a dry diaper. After the change it was time to grab a bite to eat before grabbing some down time for a bit. It would have been nice to come back and have someone special waiting for me but there could not be anyone if my wings were to remain a secret. Keeping my wings and my diapers a secret meant staying alone and invisible outside of class.

 

My art professors were nice and everyone in the art courses seemed to be a lot more mature about things so this made the course easier on me until the inevitable happened to me. Halfway into a four hour class my diaper began to leak. This was frustrating but not the end of the world. Without raising a fuss about the situation I simply slipped from the room quietly to go change.

 

The leak had been small and no one seemed to notice it thankfully. Once the change was finished it was a simple matter to quietly return to the class to finish working on a colored chalk drawing. The rest of the class went smoothly and no one made any comments until the end of the class when the professor called for me to wait a moment after class.

 

Once everyone left the class the professor smiled at me. “Is there a reason you are wearing a diaper to my class? I do allow restroom breaks when you need them.” “I am medically incontinent ma'am. I have been so my entire life.” “That makes sense then. The spot was small and I doubt many noticed it. You also seemed a bit distracted today. Is everything alright outside of classes?” “Everything is quiet outside classes ma'am.”

 

“Then why are you looking so tired? If you are sick then stay home and rest until you get better. Pushing yourself too hard will not help you.” “I know ma'am, but something happened the other day and it hit me really hard. I took a personal day off to deal with the issue and did not sleep well.” “Okay. Care to talk about it? I'm a great listener.” “I would rather not ma'am. It is very personal. I'm not pregnant ma'am so it is not that but it is personal to me and dealing with it took it's toll on me is all I'm willing to say on the subject ma'am.”

 

“Very well then Amelia. Let me know if you change your mind though.” “Thank you for the offer ma'am but I do not see myself changing my mind anytime soon.” With that said and no objections then I simply walked out of the room and to my last class of the day. The last class for today was a class they required freshman to take. The course was no one that most considered an important course but being as it was a required course everyone attended it.

 

The course was basically a discussion on daily events in the news. Today they were going to hold a discussion that would hit me harder than any previous discussion. Once inside the class and in my usual place it was a matter of quietly waiting for the professor to show up and give us our topic to discuss for the day.

 

The professor walked in and quickly read his notes before addressing the class. Good afternoon everyone. Today we are going to be discussing the new laws that congress passed concerning avians and the affect it will have on any and all avians who are out there and maybe a few here in this very college.” My head whipped around to face the professor so fast it almost gave me whiplash.

The professor noticed this and so picked me to be the first one to break the ice today.

 

“Amelia, would you care to comment on this?” “Sir, I believe that no matter how many laws are passed that Avians will still be forced to live in fear and hide who they really are. Most law enforcement agencies simply do not care and a lot of racist and religious fanatics would like nothing better than to see us dead.”

 

“Interesting choice of words Amelia. Would anyone else like to comment?” A boy not much older than me stood up and went next. “I don't see how any of this matters. Avians don't exist and if they did they should stick with their own kind.” It took a lot of effort not to get up and walk out of the class for good after that comment.

 

Several others did not agree with his view of the subject but a lot felt that we did not exist and if we did then it was our own fault if we got beat on or insulted. It made my mood very ugly and very dark. It was taking a lot of restraint to not lash out at the fools. I finally stood up again and asked if anyone had read the paper a few days ago. “Has anyone here read the paper recently? A few days ago the police in another town arrested a group of racists for kidnapping and torturing a young 13 year old boy to death. His only crime was being an avian.

 

Those sick bastards seemed to think they were doing the public a service by torturing him to death and in the end they walked due to a technicality. That poor boy died a horrible and painful death at their hands and yet no one seemed to care! What the hell is wrong with society that you allow us to be tortured and killed for your own amusement? When all the avians are gone then who do we persecute next? I continent people? Old people, Where do you draw the line once you start down that path?”

 

Another girl stood up and half sneered at me before speaking. “Why so worried about the diaper wearers? You worried someone will find out you wear diapers or something?” “No I'm not worried about that. I worry about what will happen when the next avian is found beaten and almost dead from hate groups!”

 

The girl laughed a moment then replied. “So you admit you wear diapers and love those winged freaks?” “As a matter of fact I am medically incontinent and have been my whole life, but that is not the issue here Belinda. I do care what happens to the avians for a damned good reason. It is illegal to attack an avian simply because of what they are. It is considered a hate crime.

 

Where I came from a young avian girl was attacked and beaten almost to death by a group of racists. The end result was a lengthy hospital stay and mental scars worse than the physical ones. Three people died in that attack and the young girl still has nightmares from it! All because she has wings and can fly! Not once did anyone try to stop the group until it was too late!

 

They put poisons and explosives in the apartment that would have killed not just her but everyone else in the building and anyone within a ten block radius. All because she is an avian! What if it was you on the receiving end of the attack? Or how about your brother, sister, best friend, or a parent?

 

When the laws of society are ignored then the society begins to decay under it's own weight and eventually it falls down and disintegrates like the Ancient Roman empire did. The laws to protect Avians are in place for a reason. Hating them and ignoring the laws is the first step to society falling apart.”

 

The professor smiled at me as I sat down again. “Very good points Amelia. It is nice to see you so passionate about a discussion for once. So tell us, did you know this girl personally or was this just to make your very valid point?” “I know the girl really well sir. I still have the nightmares and still carry the scars from the attack on me. Because of that attack I was forced to kill three people in self defense and did not find out until the court hearing.”

 

I lifted my shirt as I took a deep breath. My wings fanned out for everyone to see and also revealed a number of very nasty scars from the attack. “I was the girl that was attacked and almost killed. I am an avian and yes, Belinda, like so many others like me, I am medically incontinent.” We spent the rest of the class discussing the case in detail and how I felt about the laws in place currently. At the end of the cl;ass Belinda came up to me and spoke to me as my shirt was being lowered back down over me folded wings.

 

She saw the scars up close and stopped a moment. “I never considered it from your point of view. I'm sorry about this. How long were you in the hospital for after the attack?” “Over two months. They did not break my wings but I did not get away unscathed either as you can see. The article in the paper caused me to have a sort of meltdown when I read about it as it was so close to what happened to me.

 

The entire incident is recorded on a website for avians and serves as a warning that we all have to be very careful about revealing ourselves at times. Mine is not the only story but it is one of the worst. I talk to a counselor a couple times a month to deal with the nightmares from the attack and try to stay invisible.

 

Until today no one but the campus doctor knew about my wings. I just hope that I have not made a huge mistake in revealing myself to the world, but only time will tell.” “I'm so sorry about what I said to you though. I didn't know.” “It's alright. You had no way of knowing about me. The wings have been kept tucked under my clothes and my opinions on all the subjects have largely been kept to myself so as not to stand out in any way. Blending in and vanishing in a sea of others has been my way of staying hidden and of surviving. Now that my wings are no longer a secret it is unknown what will happen next.”

 

Once out of the classroom then my next stop was a restroom to change to change my mud filled diaper that was starting to smell. What happened in the class replayed in my mind while I cleaned up and changed before leaving the restroom. My actions were guided by impulse and now it was too late to try to hide from everyone on the campus. Now everyone would know about my wings and the fact I have to use protection.

 

As my feet carried me across campus and to my dorm room it was a trip that seemed to take forever with me being a little nervous about some racist group or some bible carrying extremist deciding to make me the target of their next attack. After hiding for so long it was a bit frightening to come out of hiding and face the world. What would they say when they saw me? What would they do to me?

 

Maybe it would be better to just write it off as a mistake and move on to another town where my wings could be hidden and with a lot more caution, no one would know about them ever. For now it was not doing me good to run away instantly in fear. Maybe if people were used to seeing me with wings they would eventually ignore me again. It was making me a nervous wreck and twice I almost packed my clothes to run away as fast as my wings could carry me.

 

The same question tortured me again and again while another diaper was changed. Did I do the right thing in telling them? Was I in danger now that they knew about the wings and the diapers? Should I just cut and run before they came after me? Since my supply of diapers was gone I had no choice but to leave my room to go get more. It was a nervous 20 minutes later that my choice was made to not hide what was now known.

 

My five special shorts for my wings were in my closet and hidden in a box below a pile of clothes. After ten minutes of digging for them they were finally removed from my closet and brought out into the full light of the room. I loved these shirts that were a perfect fit for my wings. For the first time in several months they would once again be seen in the light of day by someone other than myself.

 

Setting down in front of a small mirror I put makeup on again and then debated whether or not to wear my favorite pants now that my secret was out and hiding was no longer possible. In the end it was a nice black pair of slacks that fit loosely enough in the diaper region that were chosen by me.

 

It took a few more minutes to get changed into the slacks then finally to get to the door. My hands shook as they closed on the doorknob. A part of me was frightened at the prospect of going public after having hidden for so long. It had only been about two hours since everyone found out but a part of me seemed to think that a mob was already assembling with torches and pitchforks to burn the diaper wearing freak.

 

With a deep breath and a conscious effort to stop the shaking and calm down, the doorknob was finally turned and the door opened by me. No angry mob awaited me. No one was threatening to kill me for being a freak or any other thing, but it was still frightening to to do this. Was it a mistake to try so soon? Would they be angry at me for being different? Only one way to find out as I walked out and shut the door behind me to go shopping for more supplies. The first step had been taken and now the rest was up to the world.

End part two

 

Part three

Walking down the hall was nerve wracking at first as several students turned to look at me since my wings were no longer hidden from the world like they had been for the past number of months. It would take some time for people to get used to seeing me with my wings in plain sight and not hidden beneath my clothes.

 

Once outside the dorm building the number of people staring at me increased until I fanned my wings out all the way and took to the air as everyone in the area stared in surprise at having seen me not only with wings but now flying. There was no way to go back now that so many had seen me fly off without even attempting to hide my wings.

 

Within a few minutes the medical supply store came into sight below me. After circling while descending there was enough speed shed to safely land without worrying about crashing. The next trick was to land without hitting anyone below with my wings before they could be folded up along my back after landing. Fortunately for me people cleared out of the way when they saw me coming down fast only to flare my wings out and flap them to cut the last of my speed at the last moment.

 

Once on the ground they folded more naturally along my back but were still very visible to everyone walking nearby. There was no mistaking me for anything other than an avian. It was a relief to walk inside the store where no one but the staff were there to stare at my wings. The lady that usually took care of me saw me and smiled.

 

“About time you stopped hiding those lovely wings of yours dear. You should never be ashamed of who you are and if others can not accept that then too damned bad for those idiots. Now what can we do for you today?” “I just need to pick up another couple packs of depends. I'm out and need more.” The lady smiled then showed me to the shelves where they had all the adult diapers. “Why not try something better dear? Depends work but they have lousy tapes on them.”

 

The tapes had been a bit of a hassle with coming loose but that there were other brands of adult diapers out there was a mild surprise to me. “We have a wide selection of different brands to choose from. Some of them are not as good as depends and some are far superior to depends.. Let me show you the samples we have.” After a good 30 minutes of being shown the samples and having the differences explained to me I finally went with a different brand that were thicker and had much better tapes and absorbency so they would enable me to go longer between changes.

 

With my decision made she rang up the order then put them in a plain brown plastic bag for me. No one would be able to see what was in the sack and thus it would give me some relief from the staring eyes of everyone around me. It was going to take some getting used to not hiding my wings anymore. As I walked out of the store the same worries continued to plague me.

 

Would they hate me because of my wings? Would it be safer to leave and never come back? Were they going to expel me from the schools for keeping the wings a secret. It made me feel ashamed and afraid to let anyone see them. It was difficult for me to not keep going and to just wait until nightfall before landing at the dorm. A part of me wanted to just get my things and leave now before they decided to try to kill me again like the last time.

 

The world hates me and wants me dead it seems at times. I could not help but wonder if anything was ever going to change or if they were going to go on wanting to kill me because of my wings. It was a great relief to finally land and then make my way back to inside my dorm room where no one would stare at me.

 

After closing the door and then putting my diapers away the note was slid under my door by someone. It was no surprise to me that they were already wanting me out of here. Picking up the note off of the floor was easy but it was sad at the same time as they were surely going to insult me again just because of my wings. With some reluctance the letter was opened and read.

 

Nothing ever changes it seems. 1000 miles from the last place and still things stay the same. It was all starting again with the hateful notes. My eyes scanned the note once more before throwing it on the small table in the room. “Freak! We don't want your kind here!” Tears threatened to cloud my vision as my mid raced with painful memories of the last time. Why? What did I do that was so wrong?

 

A quick diaper change into one of the newer diapers helped a little until another note was slid under my door. The note was was what was expected and was confirming to me that there was no place in this world for me or anyone like me if you have wings. Reading both notes with tears in my eyes helped to confirm what was already suspected by me in the first place.

 

Maybe if they saw nothing of me outside of class I could make it through the year and then go somewhere else to start over again. Maybe it would have been better if I had never been born. The world hated me and all because of my wings. Would it make a difference if I had them removed and just tried to forget about being an avian? Could I even live without my wings?

 

The art courses were interesting but in the back of my mind were the nagging doubts and fears that began to show up in my work. My works were darker themed and a few times they were spooky as they reflected my growing dislike of life. One of my drawings featured an avian hanging by a rope with her wings cut off and laying on the ground at her feet. The drawing was never turned in and was instead shredded and thrown away.

 

The number one fun thing to do in my automotive classes anymore was to dump oil or some gas on my wings supposedly by accident. Twice they forced me to leave class to wash the mess off my wings while they all seemed to think it was funny. On one other occasion they almost set me on fire. One of the students dumped gas on my wings and another one tried to light me on fire a moment later with a lighter. I hit the one with a lighter hard enough to break two of his ribs and send him flying back about ten feet.

 

The teacher kicked both students out of the class permanently for this stupidity. The teacher let me leave early to go wash the fuel out of my wings so no one would do anything stupid and hurt me. It did not stop them from getting me though. Halfway across the campus with the stink of gasoline coming from my wings they hit me with a bottle rocket. My wings exploded into flames instantly. My screams of pain as I rolled on the ground attracted attention.

 

Someone threw a coat over my wings and beat out the flames but not before they severely burned my feathers and left me with second degree burns on the wings and my back. My back and both wings screamed in pain at me as blackness mercifully overtook me. When consciousness returned to me finally I was being hosed off with water from a garden hose while they waited for paramedics.

 

“Don't try to get up. Just lay there and let me keep you cool. Your back and wings are badly burned. The water will help to cool down the burning and cut down the damage down. I know it hurts but please don't move until the paramedics get here.” I was in so much pain that it made me want to just die to end the pain that was screaming through my body from the burns.

 

Once the paramedics arrived on scene they carefully examined my wings and gave me a shot for pain as the water continued to be sprayed over the worst of the burns to help cool them off. A few minutes more of them talking with the nearest hospital and blackness mercifully claimed me. There were voices and some sense of movement then nothing but darkness for a time before my senses returned to me in the hospital.

 

They kept me in the hospital for a week as the numerous burns were closely watched for any signs of infection. At the end of the third day they carefully removed the numerous bandages off of my wings. The damage was horrible to see. Most my feather were burned off and there were bad burns everywhere. They told me that the swelling had gone don considerably and that in a few weeks the burns would be healed and my feathers should grow back as well.

 

Upon returning to the dorm with my wings in bandages several people were shocked to see me like this and in obvious pain. Just walking to my dorm room made me want to scream in pain. Every tiny movement of my wings and back hurt. A couple of the girls held doors open for me when they saw me hurting when I moved my arms to open the doors. The pain medicine had worn off 25 minutes ago at least and the burns were making it hard to not scream in pain.

 

Once back in the dorm room I gritted my teeth and changed my diaper without screaming in pain. After taking my pain pills with a glass of water it was time to read the numerous massages that had been slid under my door while they had me in the hospital. All of the letters called me a freak and told me I was not wanted here. Two of them told me to burn in hell.

 

It made me wonder if it was worth it to stay here any longer. Everyone in the world seems to hate avians for no good reason. Not once in all the time going to school here has there been any attempt by me to hurt or bother anyone. Every effort has been made by me to be a good student and to stay out of sight most of the time.

 

Sleep finally overtakes me as the pain pills take effect. The dreams are ugly and dark dreams. It feels like the entire world hates me simply because of the wings on my back and for no other reason. What must be done by me to make them understand that I don't hate them and have no ill will towards anyone. Religions hate me because of their misguided belief that I am here to steal souls from God and deliver them to Satan. Racists hate me because of my wings and my ability to fly.

 

It takes almost eight weeks for my burns to fully heal and the feathers to grow back finally. Getting caught back up on missed work is not easy but with determination it is done. Still, every time that I come back from classes there are hateful letters slid under my door. Four times they have hacked into the school network and erased my grades.

 

My new car has had to have all four tires changed out twice now and sugar has been dumped into my gas tank on more than one occasion. Last night they painted the word FREAK on my car. They never stop reminding me that there is no one else like me in the area and that they want me gone. Anyone who has dared to talk to me has been a victim of vandalism as well so now everyone on campus refuses to even talk to me.

 

It is starting to get too much for me to handle. Twice they have broken into my dorm room and wrecked everything in the room. Even my diapers were wrecked by the assholes. It is bad enough they ruined my paintings and drawings, but now they dumped motor oil and gasoline into all my spare diapers as well. They painted the word FREAK on my dorm room wall and it cost me almost $200.00 to get it removed and to have the wall repainted.

 

Yesterday they dropped off several bibs, baby bottles, pacifiers and baby diapers in my dorm room and ruined all my spare diapers again. How much more do I have to endure before they finally decide to move on to another victim? They call my dorm room phone at all hours of the night to insult me and campus security is either unable or unwilling to do anything. Why? What have I done to them to make them hate me?

 

Spending an entire weekend away and at the church helped calm me a little but with no one to talk to and no help from anyone it is too much to be able to take anymore. They hate me not so much because of my diapers, but because of my wings. Nothing seems to please them more than to do what they can to make my life a living hell. All because of my stupid wings. That's why it is time to take care of the issue.

 

It is not an easy decision to make but with several days to think it over the decision was made that would solve the issue once and for all. It is not a decision made lightly and not one that once done can be undone ever, but it is for the best since there is no other way. Why did they have to hate me so much? Why can't they accept me for who I am? The tears threatened to cloud my vision as the walk across campus seemed to take forever.

 

I made a final stop at the door of the campus medical clinic and took a long last look at myself before entering. The silent debate raged inside of me as the door closed behind me. It seemed almost as if a door was closing on my past forever and that once closed, there would be no going back. After steadying my nerves I walked up to the small window where the doctor was finishing paperwork. She smiled when she looked up and saw me.

 

“welcome back Amelia. What can I do for you today?” After a moment's hesitation I spoke up. “Surgery. I need you to make me normal again doctor.” “I'm not sure I follow you Amelia. You are normal.” “No doctor, I'm not normal, but you can help make me normal” I took a deep breath and avoided looking at my wings as I spoke. “I need you to remove my wings forever so I can be normal. The world hates me because of the damned things! If you remove them then they can finally stop wanting me dead because of them.”

 

She looked shocked to hear me say this to her. She knew I loved my wings and flying, but it was for the best this way. No more hate letters. No more angry phone calls. No more getting my grades erased. The world would no longer need to fear me or hate me once the wings were removed. I could finally be free to move on with my life and not be branded as a freak.

 

“I can't do that Amelia and even if I could I would not. Your wings are not just some annoyance to be removed honey. They are a part of you as much as your arms and legs are a part of you. To remove them would cripple you and you would come to regret it and even hate me for it in the centuries to come. Let me show you something Amelia. I know you are hurting but you need to see this as it is very important and you should know.

 

With reluctance I followed her to the back room where the medical records are kept locked and hidden from prying eyes. “When we did that blood work on you right after you came back from the hospital I ran it through the normal tests and then did the legacy test as well just to be thorough.” She pulled the paperwork off the shelf with my name on it. “Look right here at the results of the tests.” When my eyes finally got to the legacy test I froze in horror.

 

“That's right honey. You have the legacy gene. You will outlive everyone on this campus and see wonders I can't even dream of yet. Do you really want to go for centuries knowing that at a time of you being the most vulnerable that I took advantage of you and maimed you for life? You will live for centuries honey and I know for certain you would hate me doing this to you. Don't let them get to you honey. Stay strong and this will all pass in time.”

 

Time. Time was now my enemy as well. I was just told that an eternity of suffering awaited me and that there would be centuries of having to endure the pain of being an outcast. Centuries and not just years. The legacy gene would keep me alive and young forever while the hate groups and religions continued to want me dead.

 

Tears flowed down my face as I ran from the building. Centuries and even millenniums of pain and hate directed at me because of my wings. It was not fair to torture me this way. To have no way to escape the pain. Outside the building my wings flared out as I lifted into the sky as if to prove to the world that the freak still lives and they can still have their fun tormenting the diaper wearing freak.

 

After hours of flying my mind was made up as to another way out of the pain. It would end the mess once and for all and no one would again have to be bothered with the winged, diaper wearing freak. No one would care and it would correct an error that should have been corrected a long time ago. The world would be better off this way and so would I.

 

Without even caring anymore that my diaper was soaked and leaking the preparations were made in my dorm room. The tears flowing down my face made it difficult to get the rope around the ceiling beams above the ceiling tiles and to get the noose tied correctly so it would not slip. The only chair in the room was pushed into place and a rope held my wings secure so they would not stop what needed to be done.

 

It was better this way as I took and climbed onto the chair on the table. A rope leading to the table leg and then to another beam several feet away would yank the table and chair from under me and out of reach so that the drop would break my neck and kill me. It was better this way. There was no place in the world for a freak like me. No more worries about grades, hate, fear, diapers. No more being a freak. A last look around and then a step forward as the rope holding the table was pulled hard.

 

Security was making the rounds of the dorms and heard a crash from inside one of the rooms on the fourth floor. Carl sighed and figured one of the girls must have dropped something. Still, he was obligated to make sure everything was alright since there had been a number of problems associated with this room. The girl in the room was a lovely young avian girl and was enduring so much right now.

 

He knocked on the door and called out several times. Maybe she just knocked something over in her sleep since it was late out. Something in the back of his mind would not let it go though. It then hit him that someone had said earlier that a bunch of rope had been stolen from one of the buildings earlier that day and now the noise and the fact that she was depressed hit him like a ton of bricks as he raced up the hallway as fast as he could. He knew that sound from his little brother doing the same thing ten years ago.

 

The door gave way with a splintering crash as he hit at a full run. Hanging from the ceiling by the stolen rope was Amelia. The wings had been tied shut with another rope so that they could not interfere with the suicide attempt. Carl wasted no time and shot the rope with his pistol. The lifeless body crashed to the floor. “Oh God no. Please not again.” He yanked the rope off of her neck and felt for a pulse. It was still there but very erratic and faint. She was not breathing either. He did mouth to mouth to try to get some air into her lungs and then grabbed his radio and hit the emergency button before calling out.

 

“Molly! Grab the gear and meet me in 413 building two! Amelia is down! Suicide attempt by hanging! Faint pulse, no breathing! Hurry!” Carl dropped the radio and went back to doing mouth to mouth on Amelia. The diaper she had on had flooded when she almost broke her neck and was leaking badly. He almost considered changing her but there was no time if he wanted to try to save her.

 

Molly grabbed the phone on the clinic wall and dialed 911. “This is Molly at the campus clinic. I have a suicide attempt in room 413 building two! I need an ambulance right away! Be advised, the patient is an avian! I'll call back again on my cell phone when I get to her room!” Molly hung up the phone and ran with her arms full of emergency gear to Amelia's room.

 

The door was smashed open and half off it's hinges. Amelia was laying lifeless on the floor as Carl continued to do mouth to mouth on her. The two of them worked on her frantically for several minutes as molly had 911 on speaker so she could work on Amelia and try to save her life. The neck had a nasty bruise around it from the rope and she was not getting any air due to swelling.

 

Molly wasted no time in starting to make an emergency tracheotomy to get air into Amelia's lungs. “No pulse molly!” “Oh hell! Starting CPR right now! Carl, get that bag hooked to that tube and keep squeezing it!” It was like a scene out of a nightmare for Carl and Molly as they worked for 20 minutes to save Amelia's life. The ambulance crew finally arrived as molly finally declared a minor victory. “I have a pulse again! Still not breathing on her won yet! Continuing with bag!”

 

The ambulance crew took over and got Amelia loaded on the gurney for transport to the hospital. The paramedics ignored her leaking diaper and rushed her down the halls towards the waiting ambulance parked just outside the dorm building. It was obvious to everyone who was there that it was Amelia being taken by ambulance to the hospital. A few saw the ugly bruising around her neck and wondered what had happened to her.

 

Carl and Molly began cleaning up the mess they had made when Carl knocked over a small tray with paperwork in it. He handed one of the hate letters to Molly. “I want to find out who wrote these and break them in half for this. I'm going to treat this now as a hate crime Molly. The police will need a full statement from both of us. After that I'm going to go see how she is doing then find someone to bust in half.”

 

The police took statements from Molly and from Carl as they wrote the report. Carl showed the officers the hate letters and explained everything that he knew about the incident. The officers were not happy by the time the report was done and promised that whoever was behind these attacks was going to pay for it. “The mayor takes a real dim view on hate crimes in this city and I guarantee that those who pushed her this far will pay a heavy price for it when caught.”

 

By 9:00 pm that night news had spread like wildfire through the campus that Amelia had tried to kill herself for some reason. Everyone was shocked it had gone this far and several people were ashamed at having not stood by her when she needed someone the most. Once again the resolve and mood on campus changed very dramatically. The majority of the students wanted someone's head for this and even those who did not know much about it knew who Amelia was. She was the girl on campus with the big wings. Sure she was incontinent, but she was very nice, polite and very pretty as well. Had she not tried so hard to be invisible several of the guys would have asked her out and so would a few of the girls.

 

It was at five in the afternoon on the next day that the dean called a meeting of all the students and faculty. The Dean walked out onto the stage to address the people assembled. “As you are all aware by now, we had a suicide attempt on campus yesterday. A young avian girl by the name of Amelia Reid tried to hang herself and almost succeeded. She is in the hospital currently in a coma and the doctors do not know if she will pull through.

 

Amelia came out as an avian a few months ago and since then someone has seen fit to try to make her life a living hell. I will not tolerate racism on my campus! If any of you hate someone for their race, ethnic background, religion or any of a number of stupid reasons then feel free to leave my school and never come back! Amelia was driven to attempted suicide due to a number of hate letters she received after coming out.

 

What I have found out is that this is not the first time she has been threatened. A few months before coming here to go to school she was attacked and almost killed in her home town. She spent months in the hospital recovering from the attack that almost killed her. She was attacked simply because of her wings. How many of you have ever once tried to be nice to her or get to know her? How many of you even tried to make friends with her?

 

She hid her wings for several months before finally coming out as an avian. She left her town and came here to start over again and try to get on with her life after the horrible incident back home. Earlier this year someone almost burned her to death with a stupid prank. She healed up from that and now this! This has gone too damned far now! This will not be tolerated as long as I am dean of this school! The hate ends today and it ends now! How many of you have ever wondered who that stone bench is named after in the open area under the big tree?

 

It is named after a young man who was an avian that stayed with us for a while and he went through hell as well. Look it up and read about it then think long and hard because the next idiot trying this kind of thing on this campus will be looking at a very long stay in a jail cell. The last time we had an avian on campus he did his best to help others. Amelia here is no different. She has helped a lot of you in various classes and never thought twice about it.

 

On the school message board is a link to a site we made a few years ago that tells about some of the things that a few people with differences have overcome and endured. This school has a reputation of being a place that is willing to go the extra mile to help anyone in need of help. I will not have you idiots that caused this to tarnish that reputation. This school is open to humans, avians and even newcomers. I will not tolerate hate crimes here, now or ever!

 

If anyone of you feel down then don't just take it silently and let it build up until you snap. We have counselors available to help. I urge you to make this the last time anyone here ever thinks of suicide as their only way out. If you see someone being picked on because of their race or other reason then let someone know! I don't want anyone here to think they have to endure this treatment from anyone else ever.

 

For the ones responsible for the notes to Amelia that helped to push her over the edge, you will be found and you will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Updates on Amelia's condition will be posted on the school bulletin board and on the school website daily. Anyone with information is urged to contact me or any of the faculty.”

 

END PART THREE

PART FOUR

The nurses kept a careful eye on Amelia as she lay in a coma and on a ventilator. By the end of the third day she was removed form the ventilator as she was breathing on her own. They continued to change her wet and messy diapers as needed while she laid in the bed unmoving for the next three weeks.

 

The investigation into the whole mess had finally found one person who had written one note as a prank and felt guilty. He was let loose as his note was not meant to be hateful and had only said I know. It was a common prank to pull on new students and no one had ever thought it would be just the beginning of a series of hate filled notes that would drive Amelia over the edge.

 

It took the police weeks to begin tracing down all the leads and eliminating them one at a time until they received an anonymous tip. Two weeks later they raided a new church in town and arrested the pastor and 15 others for hate crimes and numerous other crimes. Amelia was just waking up as the first of the people were being arrested for their part in the hate crime.

 

The light was shining brightly on my face as I tried to open my eyes and make sense of where I was. My neck and throat hurt as did my wings. It took a few tries to set up far enough to stretch my wings out to ease the stiffness in them. My wings slowly and stubbornly opened all the way up as they responded to my will. After a few more seconds they were being moved carefully in full rotation to ease the stiffness in them.

 

A nurse passed by my room and expected to see me laying in the bed still but stopped when she saw me moving my wings carefully to ease the stiffness in them. My arms felt like lead as they were forced to move and respond to my commands. After a few minutes it all started to come back to me as the nurses came in to ask gentle questions. My body ached and my head pounded. There was a still healing scar in my throat from something but it did not matter.

 

My torment was not yet over and it seemed that perhaps it never would be. There was no end to the pain for me and all because of my wings marking me as different. My wings made me an outcast from society and marked me as a freak, An accident that should never have been. The stupid questions seemed to take forever and were only slowed down by a diaper change.

 

A counselor was sent in to talk to me but there was nothing that I wanted to discuss with the man since he spent most of his time leering at my chest which disgusted me. The tenth week after the attempt they finally released me from the hospital with orders to seek counseling. The orders were ignored as the counseling would do nothing to stop those who hated me. After getting to outside of the building the sky beckoned me to come fly in it for a while.

 

The nurse wanted me to wait for the cab they had called but the pull of the open air was too much for me to resist and a moment later my wings helped to carry me into the sky as a van from the mental hospital pulled up to take me there instead of back to my dorm. They were not going to lock me up and torture me anymore . Never again would they be able to find me and hate me.

 

It was the middle of the night when my flight brought me back to the dorm rooms one final time. Everyone was asleep and would hopefully stay that way while things were rounded up and taken to my car for transport. All my tools, clothes, diapers, and art supplies were taken down to my car and loaded inside for a trip away from here to where no one would bother to look for me.

 

With everything loaded into my car and made ready for transport the key to the dorm room was left in the lock for them to do with as they pleased. Where my journey would take me was to one place no one would look for me at or care. It was almost three hours later when the small church finally came into sight.

 

It seemed to take an eternity to reach the small church with my car but in this place no one would have cause to hate me and want to kill since no one else was near. Even the nearest town was an hours drive away once the main road was reached. The main road was almost 35 miles away from this small church in the middle of nowhere. This would be my new home for now until it was safe for me to leave. Once everyone has forgotten me then maybe it will be safe to return to the world with my wings hidden.

 

Upon leaving the car my diaper hung heavily and was in obvious need of changing before it leaked. With only half a bag of diapers left they would have to be worn until completely full. Once they were gone then it would be necessary for me to fly to town long enough to purchase more then return here before the hate groups could assemble and try to kill me. At the very least there would be plenty of time to paint and draw with no deadlines.

 

With everything safely moved inside the church it was time for a diaper change before it leaked and made a mess of my clothes. I changed my diaper and then debated on how to get rid of the used one where no one would see it and know that a freak was nearby. In the end a simple hole in the ground worked well for this. Once the diaper was buried then no one would find it and know that a freak was in the area.

 

The car would have to be somehow hidden as well so that it could not be spotted easily from the ground or from the air. Food was not a problem at the moment but would be required in the future, as would water. There were many things to consider but for the moment no one knew where I was at. Perhaps they would think of me as dead and stop looking for me. All this because of my wings and the unreasoning hatred by others of anyone that is different.

 

This same hatred had cost me my family, my friends, my home, and now even an education. Why? What did it matter that I have wings? Yes they allow me to fly, but why did that make me a threat to be feared and hated? Why did they have to always think that avians were agents of Satan or a threat to society? Not once have any of us, to my knowledge, tried to do more than fit in and make our way in this world like everyone else.

 

They have tried twice and almost succeeded twice in trying to kill me. It seems that my suffering is not over just yet. My attempt at ending the pain failed and it makes me wonder if perhaps god really does hate me and all those like me because we so closely resemble the appearance of his angels. Are we really fallen angels? Agents of Satan sent to lead God's chosen astray? Or are we merely just freaks like so many call us?

 

So many of us killed and forced to hide simply because we are different. It saddens me to think that for some reason god hates us and wants some of us to suffer for an eternity as an example to others. It drives me crazy to think that my lifespan will not be measured in years but in centuries instead. How does the oldest of us stay sane after over 2000 years of being alive? How do you find a reason to continue when all around is unreasoning hate, despair, fear, and the unending torture of loneliness? Is it worth it to even try?

 

Tears flowed down my face and clouded my vision while despair held me tight in it's embrace. Why does God hate me? What did I do that was so wrong that it made him so mad at me? “Why do you hate me so God? What horrible thing have I done to anger you so that you would do this to me? Tell me why must this pain last an eternity? Is there no way to end the pain?”

 

As always, there was nothing but silence to answer my questions as the tears rolled down my face and fell to the ground. There was no peace for me even here. My personal demons followed me and reminded me that even here there would be no peace. It would have been better had they not saved me. The world wanted nothing to do with a diaper wearing freak such as myself.

 

The next three days were filled with me painting and drawing whatever came to my mind. At the end of three days my supply of food, water and diapers was about gone. A trip into a town would have to be made for the things needed for me to survive. Caution would have to exercised so they did not have reason to hate me and want to kill me on sight.

 

It was early the next morning when I left in my car with all the trash rounded up and in a bag to be thrown away somewhere far away from the church. My wings were tucked carefully under my shirt so no one would see them. With caution they would not think of me as anyone different than them and my face would simply be one of many in a sea of faces.

 

It was sad that there was no place in society for me but that is the price one such as myself must pay for being different. My need for diapers and my wings made me an outcast, a freak. Since trips into town would have to be very infrequent everything would have to be picked up on this trip so that the supplies would hold me over for quite a while. My wings would have to be kept concealed from the world under my shirt and tightly folded around my body so that no one would see them.

 

It was sad to pass by a small college and to think that as much as an education in art and auto mechanics was wanted by me that it could never be. This had been proven to me very painfully and in no uncertain terms. They considered me a freak. An agent of evil that should be destroyed. All this hatred simply because of me being born different than they were.

 

At the first A.T.M. machine I withdrew a large sum of cash so that no one would ask to see my identification that would instantly give away my status as an avian freak. With this cash on me it made purchasing supplies easier than using my debit card. Several sketch books, pencils, paints, brushes, canvases, and cheap frames were purchased in an art shop going out of business. When I left the shop they had sold me almost all of their remaining stock. All of this was put into my car without anyone seeming to notice me.

 

The next stop was at a pharmacy store for more diapers. The clerk wanted to ask me a thousand questions about why I was buying diapers and where I came from. When she asked me my name it was enough to put me on my guard. “What does it matter what my name is? Is my money unwelcome here? If it is then say so. My purchases can be made at some other place in town if need be.” She shut up after that and rang up my purchase of ten bags of adult diapers which were paid for in cash by me and then put into my car.

 

The last stop was at a retail outlet store to get groceries, a camping stove, a flashlight, batteries and some foam padding to lay on the floor of the church to make a bed with. No one seemed to notice me until it was time to pay for my things. The clerk looked at me funny for a moment before speaking up. “Stocking up for a camping trip?” “Yes. A long camping trip that will last for a while.” “Where you camping at?” “Somewhere far from here and very private.” “You look an awful lot like that girl in the picture over on the wall over there.”

 

she was pointing at a picture of me that simply stated that I was missing and that authorities were looking for me. It described me as an avian and mentioned the color of my wings. Below was a number to call if anyone had seen me or had any information about my location. It was a good picture of me and it made me realize that it would be safer to keep my wings hidden when in any town or risk being hunted down and put in a cage like a freak.

 

“It is a nice picture but you don't see any wings do you? The sign lists the person as an avian and since you don't see any wings it obviously isn't me.” “I don't know your reason for hiding dear, but they seem awfully worried about you. The scar on your neck gives you away honey. Stay calm. I wont say anything to anyone. Maybe you should at least let them know you are alright so they stop worrying about you. You don't have to say where you are hiding or why. At least consider it.”

 

After my purchase was paid for and loaded into the car the fear began to return. It would soon be impossible to go into town for things that were needed by me unless I drove a long ways away from here and stopped in another town. My fuel was low so it was time to stop and get gas somewhere that would not care who got gas as long as they paid. A truck stop would be a good place as they were always too busy to notice anyone as long as you blended in.

 

My car was fueled up all the way and my gas paid for when three highway patrol pulled into the truck stop. They were looking for someone so without making a scene or panicking visibly, I calmly walked out to my car after paying and simply drove off at a normal speed then took the first exit off the e interstate. It took me longer to reach the church this way but taking the back roads was safer than being caught by them and put into a cage.

 

After finally reaching the church it took me almost an hour to unload everything and find places for it all. Everything was hidden out of sight so if anyone walked in they would only see a long forgotten church and nothing else. My used diapers were buried about a mile from the church so there was no obvious sign of me being here. It made me feel like a criminal to be forced to hide when my only crime was being born an incontinent avian,

 

The entire trip had taken most of the day to complete and left me emotionally drained. Now even the police wanted me. There was no place safe for me except here and then the moment anyone found me it would be over. They would put me in a cage and then kill me for being a freak. A diaper wearing freak at that. Why did they all hate me so much? What horrible atrocity could have been done by me to make them want to hate me so much?

 

Tears flowed down my face once more as the emotions threatened to destroy what was left of my mind. Without caring who was near that could possible see me I took to the sky. The one place that felt more at home than anywhere else and it was the one thing that marked me as a freak. An evil thing to be hunted down and destroyed for mocking God's angels. There could be no peace for me it seemed. Even in the sky there was pain, suffering, and despair.

 

After flying and finally returning it was time to get to sleep. Everything was laid out and well concealed so no one would see anything inside but an empty church. The only sign of life was my car parked behind the church. For now it was time to get some much needed sleep and ease the pain in my sore wings. The burns had left them scared in several places and flying for any prolonged period left them with a dull ache. It was another reminder why my existence must be kept a secret from the world that hated me so much.

 

Painting was my one great passion and it was always easy for me to get lost in a painting when working on one. This one was no different than other times I had painted in the past. The difference was the feeling behind the painting. Without looking closely at it I simply began to work on it until it was done the way that felt right. It had taken me three diaper changes and only a few stops for food and for water before it was completed.

 

Tomorrow it could be looked at closely by me as during the painting of it I had not looked at it as a whole and was not paying close attention to it. It would be interesting to view it in the full light after the paint had dried better overnight. With the brushes cleaned and put away and the paint tubes closed up and also put away it was time for a diaper change then some sleep. The morning would show what my fucked up mind had created.

 

Upon waking up there was a horrible smell coming from my diaper. Not a great way to start a morning. It took me a while to get myself cleaned up and into a clean diaper again. It had been a good idea after all to buy a full case of wipes since so many had to be used to clean myself off before putting a clean diaper on. It did make me miss having a shower but it was better this way.

 

After having taken the mess and buried it at least a mile away it was time to get back and inside before someone saw me flying and decided to shoot me down. The flight back took only about a minute but it was a lonely flight as always. A part of me wondered if this was how it was always going to be. Alone, hunted, afraid. This is not a life. It is simply an existence.

 

Once on the ground again it was finally time to see what mess had been painted last night. The painting was surprising. It showed the church as the background with light coming in through the windows on one side illuminating the inside of the church. On the floor was an avian on her knees with tears rolling down her face. Both ankles and both hands were chained to the floor where an engraving had been made.

 

The shadow of the cross warped and went around the girl on the floor to cast a shadow away from the girl. The message on the floor simply read, “UNWORTHY” The chains had letters on them and when read they simply said, “DECEIVER” on one chain and, “FALLEN” on the other chain. The look on the face was one full of despair and anguish. A reflection of my own twisted soul it seemed. It mirrored what my feelings were.

 

At the bottom of the painting was my signature and the word FORSAKEN as the title of the painting. Needing some air time to clear my head and not wanting to stay inside, I walked outside and took to the air with no one around to say anything about me flying or to do anything to me because of my wings marking me as a freak far different from normal people. It was quiet and lonely as the air flowed over and under my wings throughout the flight.

 

Normally a flight would relax me but there was no relaxation in this flight no matter where my wings took me. With no relief even from flying there was nothing else to do but to return and try to lose myself in drawings and perhaps another painting. No one else was around to see me land or to even talk to. It was lonely but better this way. The world hated me simply because of my wings so out here in the middle of nowhere no one was here to hate me or try to kill me.

 

The days went by in a blur of diaper changes and time spent painting and drawing and flying. I slept in the day and at night whenever the desire to do so came to me. My art was whatever was in my messed up head at the time so as a result most of the work was dark and depressing. It was a reflection of my life it seemed and there was no rhyme or reason to any of it. It was a collection of drawings and occasional paintings that were all dark reflections of my tortured soul.

 

How long it took me to go through all my food, water and diapers I do not know nor did it seem to matter to me. The place had been a good place to stay at. No one came here to tell me that they wanted me to leave here or to call me a freak. No one here to hate me enough to try killing me. No one to hate me because of my wings or my diapers. It was a lonely existence far away from everyone and everything.

 

With no other real choice, it was time to leave for supplies once again and to risk being seen and recognized. All my drawings and paintings were packed into my car along with all the trash that had not been buried far away from the church. With luck, no one would recognize me since my wings were hidden under my shirt just as they had been the last time. How long ago that had been was a mystery to me but it did not matter.

 

The drive to the town was lonely and quiet. The A.T.M. was at the same place as the last time so once my card was used to get cash they would know that the one they all hate still existed but no matter. One day of getting supplies and then it was back out to the church to hide from the world. It was my own personal limbo and my own personal hell at the same time. No matter what, there was no peace from the pain and emptiness of not belonging or being wanted.

 

No one questioned me this time or gave me strange looks. With my wings hidden they were seeing just another face in a sea of faces. Not looking like an avian made me invisible to them as long as no attention was drawn to me. Art supplies, diapers, food, water, wipes, and camouflage tarps were purchased without anyone so much as batting an eye or taking a second look at me as they rang up my purchases.

 

Coming out to the world as an avian had been a mistake and should never have been done no matter what the reason. Now they knew and it was too late for me to take the action back and be just another invisible person. They saw my wings and the price for t his was high. An eternity of suffering was to be my future. Once again it made me wonder just why God hates me so much.

 

After packing everything in the car again my diaper needed to be changed again. This was done at a convenience store near the college as the gas tank was topped off. With the diaper change out of the way and the fuel paid for there was only a matter of what to do with the drawings and the paintings. An idea that was just plain stupid refused to leave my head was my what led to me almost being caught and caged for execution.

 

The school was done for the day and most everyone was somewhere else. My mind recalled the last day on this campus as if it were a lifetime ago as once more my feet carried me to the art building on the far side of the campus. A part of me missed the school but it was foolish of me to assume that they would ever welcome me back unless it was to lock me up and torture me to death. They had made that clear on the day they set my wings on fire and again when they prevented my death.

 

Several of the professors passed by me but they did not seem to recognize me. Finally I arrived at the door to the one professor that had been nice to me throughout all of the Hell on the campus. My hand shook nervously as it reached for the doorknob and finally made contact with the metal. A deep breath to calm me down and the door was quietly opened by me far enough to allow me to quietly enter into the room.

 

With no one present in the room to say anything it made it easier to leave the work and go. They could do whatever they wished with it. Maybe they would see it and be glad to know that my suffering continued even now. It was of no consequence anymore. The artwork was laid on the professor's desk and left there for someone to find after I was long gone.

 

The hidden cameras had been installed along with the security system after my time on this campus ended so there was no way for me to know that everything was recorded. With the art dropped off it was time to leave again and return to the self imposed exile that was where one such as myself belonged. The world had made it clear that it wanted nothing to do with a freak like myself. This world had no place for one such as me no matter how much I might wish otherwise.

 

Maybe in a thousand years the world would forget about me and my bones would be long since turned to dust. As I walked down the empty hall a familiar face came from around the corner. The professor had not changed since my leaving here so long ago. I said nothing to her and kept my gaze on the floor as she walked by looking at some paperwork in her hands.

 

She stopped and turned then called out to me. “Amelia?” There was no reply from me and no hesitation in my steps away from this place. Once around a corner it was easy for me to run and vanish before she could call security to come after me and put me in a cage to await my death. While life held little for me anymore a part of me would not give them the chance to torture me to death.

 

“Amelia, come back! Please!” Her voice echoed down the hall as my feet carried me out the door and then into the awaiting darkness outside. Once outside, my pace increased until my arrival at my car. Leaving the school behind as fast as possible to return to my refuge and personal Hell was all that was was going through my mind as the buildings got smaller in the rear view mirror. Going to the school had been a mistake and now they knew that they had not killed me and would once more hunt for me.

 

It was some time later when my trip back to the church in the middle of nowhere was finally completed. Everything was unloaded and put away by the light of a flashlight as there was no electricity out here. With that done then the car was moved to behind the building and covered with the tarps which were held down with rocks. It would be difficult for a human to spot the car now so that would make it less likely for anyone to get curious enough to come here looking for me.

 

My diaper hung heavily again and after a quick change it was time for a short flight and then some sleep. Once in the air it was easy to see that no one else was near to persecute me. It had been too close tonight. There could be no more foolish trips to the school ever again. Perhaps in time I will be allowed to die in peace here where no one will find me until long after it is too late to bring me back.

 

My flight brought no peace to my troubled mind and only served to reinforce the fact that there was no place for a freak like me. The world hates me for no other reason than the very wings on my back. After leaving my home town and coming here it had been different for a while until my secret was revealed. Now that they know that they were deceived by me and tricked into thinking that there was nothing odd about me they wanted me dead.

 

There was no one to talk to and even the old man that had been here once before had not come back. This place is my prison of isolation where the only company is my own dark thoughts. My artwork brings no peace as it might have in other places and my thoughts only serve to remind me that I am truly alone in this world.

 

It took a few more days of working on a painting and thinking before an answer came to mind that might just work. It was risky and meant going back home again to my home town one last time where they all knew what I was and hated me deeply. Perhaps it would be better to just vanish forever. If Amelia ceased to exist then perhaps there was a slim chance to start over again somewhere far away where they had no clue about me.

 

This time there would be no showing my wings. No matter what the temptation was. There was some research to do but the idea was possible and perhaps it would be best this way. Relocate and start over as someone else. If no one knew about me then perhaps things would be different this time. It might be something to look into. Going home was not going to be fun but no one would be looking for me there.

 

The next day came early and a severe case of nervousness as everything I wanted to keep would be packed into my car. Starting over meant leaving my artwork behind but so be it. It would be better if Amelia just ceased to exist for a few decades or even centuries. Maybe in time the hatred would die down and avians would be accepted into society and it would be safe for Amelia to return.

 

After changing my loaded diaper again it was time for a last look at the artwork to be left for anyone to find. Only one painting came with me. The painting showed the small church from the outside with the sun setting behind it. This was my favorite view and it was the only painting not full of pain and loneliness. The rest meant almost nothing to me and maybe it was better if my art was never found.

 

The car was loaded with everything important to me and my diapers sat in the seat next to me with everything else in the back seat and trunk of the car. One last flight allowed me to see that no one was nearby to see me leave this lonely little church for perhaps the last time. Once back on the ground and a last look was taken inside the lonely little church it was time to tuck my wings in under my shirt and leave to try once more to start over.

 

Driving out of the area took almost two hours due to the condition of the road but once on the main road it was easy to make better progress towards starting over again. It would just take some time to get somewhere that an A.T.M. machine could be used to withdraw a large amount of cast so that the trip could be made more easily without leaving electronic footprints behind. It was still sad that this was the only way to end it all.

 

Three towns and a diaper change later found me walking up to an A.T.M. to withdraw cash. A quick query showed that my money was still safe and untouched for the most part. I withdrew as much as possible from this machine and five more like it in this little town before quietly driving off again. My home town beckoned me to show up to start over again.

 

Every little place along the way was another chance of getting caught and it made me feel like a criminal. Nothing illegal had been done by me but still, the old fears die hard and painful lessons proved that to me, so for now, it was best to stay invisible. There was no family and no friends to worry about. My mother died in childbirth and my father died three years ago in a drive by shooting.

 

All my childhood friends abandoned me when my wings grew in. They did not want to risk getting swept up in the mess of racism and hatred that quickly became my life and affected all those around me. All this hate, pain, suffering, despair, and loneliness just because of being born different. Why did it have to be this way? Was there no other way?

 

Once back at my hometown it was clear that things had not changed much. Everything was in the same place as before except for the apartment building that they had attacked me at. It was now gone and an empty field was all that remained in it's place. No need to ask what happened to it. After the assholes tried to poison and blow me to bits, the place was sold and torn down for safety reasons.

 

A stop at the local library allowed me some time to get on the Internet and do some information searching. After four hours on my laptop ion a back corner it was time to leave. All the information needed had been downloaded and saved onto my laptop computer for review somewhere else that was a lot safer than here. It was time to leave as a few people had stopped and stared at me a few seconds before leaving to go elsewhere. No sense giving anyone a chance to figure out that there is an avian in the building.

 

Even with my wings hidden they still distrusted me and seemed to watch my every step while I made my way out of the building with my wings concealed carefully under my shirt. Once back in the car there was no time wasted in leaving the area as fast as the speed limit would allow. A police car followed me the entire way through the town until he had to turn around as he was at the limits of his jurisdiction and had no legal reason to stop me.

 

It would be so much nicer once my identity was changed and this car sold off in favor of a different one under a new name. Once outside of city limits there was a lot less stress as the city soon disappeared in my rear view mirror. Still my instinct that something was wrong persisted and found me making damned sure to obey every traffic law so there would be no reason to pull me over.

 

Ten minutes later a highway patrol car came racing up behind me with lights and siren going. I pulled to the side of the road but he surprised me by slamming his cruiser hard into the side of mine and forcing me into the ditch before he finally stopped and got out of the car. My head hurt from where it had hit the steering wheel but this officer was going to have a lot to answer to when he was in front of me.

 

The officer walked over and laughed as my drivers side door could not be easily opened until a hard kick from me forced it to open. The officer did not even try to help and only laughed about the whole thing. “What the fuck is your problem?! You could have fucking killed me!” He walked up and slapped me hard across the face. “That was the idea, freak. Did you think we wouldn't recognize you with those wings hidden and driving a new car?”

 

“What did I ever do to you to make you hate me?” “You exist. What more reason is needed? You are an agent of the devil sent here to lure god's chosen from his side.” “It surprised me a bit but he had not pulled his gun yet so he must have something else in mind. “We are going to have lots of fun with you before we let you die freak.” “What the hell are you talking about? Why are you calling me a freak and ranting about wings? Are you fucking blind or stoned or something? I'm calling my lawyer and you will be..” A boot the the gut stopped the conversation real fast as he kicked the breath out of my lungs. My body collapsed to the pavement in pain, unable to easily breathe for a few seconds as he laughed.

 

“Nice try freak. I called the boys right after you went into the ditch. What we did to that freak a few states over was fun and we even got the judge to let us go so we could hunt down more of your kind and get rid of them. You shouldn't even exist as far as I'm concerned. We're just performing a public service in helping to eliminate a vermin.”

 

It was not easy standing back up but eventually my balance was regained as he held a gun on me. “Can't have you flying off now can we freak. In fact I think it would be best if we just saved everyone some trouble and got rid of you right here and now. This is really going to be fun.” He dropped his gun and it went off barely missing me.

 

Not wasting time waiting for him to grab his gun I grabbed him and threw him away from the gun as hard as I could. He hit the side of his car with a sickening crunch as his neck broke. It was horrifying to hear him laugh and then see him get back to his feet with his neck at the wrong angle. I grabbed the gun and emptied the entire clip into him as he laughed at me then reached out for me.

 

“You can't kill me bitch! I'm already dead. You killed me at the apartment. Now I kill you as well freak. He grabbed me and tore my wings off as I screamed in pain. He continued to laugh as he threw me into the path of a fast moving semi truck. I looked up just in time to see a bloody headless corpse behind the wheel right before it hit me.

 

There was a scream of fear and desperation from me and then a sudden return to consciousness with me breathing hard and sweating heavily. My hearts were beating like jackhammers in my body for a few minutes until my nerves calmed down and realization that it had just been a nightmare set in. Tears rolled down my face and blurred my vision while sobs racked my body. After all the counseling the nightmares still haunted me and each time they were different but always ended with me being killed by the three that had been killed by me in that horrible fight for my worthless life.

 

How long would the nightmares continue to haunt me? What needed to be done to get the nightmares to end. What price would have to be paid? There was no use in trying to sleep anymore and my diaper was a mess and in dire need of changing before it fell off of me. It was a messy ten minutes later that the mess was finally cleaned off of my body and a clean diaper put on.

 

The only thing worth a damn in the dream was an idea about getting out of here and hiding in another place where it would be far easier to vanish. It was something to consider and yet something to be feared at the same time. What if someone recognized me? How could my need to fly every few days in a bigger city where doing so would be risky?

 

It would be easier to be invisible in a bigger city, but at the same time it would be harder to fly when needed without being seen and hunted down for being a freak. It seemed that no mater which decision was made that they all had serious drawbacks to them. Perhaps if a visit was made to some place where there was a lot of wilderness nearby that was not developed then a place on the edge of that setting could be found.

 

This would give me privacy and allow me to fly as needed, but how could the property be purchased without someone tracing it back to me and then coming after me? It was an interesting idea but that's all it could be until more information on how to do that was found out. This was not a decision to be rushed into lightly. Privacy was a huge concern of mine especially since they have tried to kill me twice and not allowed me to end my pain.

 

Maybe in a few weeks when more supplies were needed there would be a chance to go into town long enough to find out if such a thing was even possible for someone such as myself. For now, it was time to get some flying done and try to forget the nightmare if possible. Perhaps an answer would come to me while flying and solve my problem for me.

 

A quick look around outside showed no one in the immediate area so within a few seconds the ground was rapidly left behind while my wings carried me into the sky where all my best thinking was done. This was one place where no one was able to interrupt me or hunt me down unless they could fly without mechanical assistance. After flying with no one to interrupt me it was still not clear how to achieve the peace so desperately sought by me.

 

All too soon it was time to land and change my soaked diaper before it leaked. There had to be some way to achieve what I wanted and not be chased down and killed like a rabid animal simply because of my wings and ability to fly. It was frustrating to me to think that the world hated me because of my wings, yet that was the reason for me being alone in the middle of nowhere like a criminal hiding from the police.

 

Perhaps it would be easier on me if opportunities to survive in South America were looked into. It would not be difficult for me to fly over the border and keep going until someplace was found that would work as a shelter for me. The rain never bothered me and it never got too cold to fly due to blizzards and several feet of snow.

 

The border to Mexico was only about 120 miles away and it would be difficult to get there in one day of flying, but once there it would be difficult finding a place that was close enough to civilization for me to get supplies like I did here every few weeks. Art supplies would be difficult to purchase as well and the fact that Spanish was never learned by me would not help either. Perhaps that idea was not a good one either.

 

Once on the ground my bowels let loose and filled the back of my diaper with a horrible mess that would take several minutes to clean off of me before getting a clean diaper on. Fate seemed to be against me this last few months. The mess took a few minutes and several wipes to clean off of me before the clean diaper was taped in place. Once the fresh diaper was on it was time to dispose of the toxic waste somewhere a few miles away where no one would care.

 

The mess was thrown into a small paper bag along with some other odds and ends of trash then taken outside. Dark clouds formed on the horizon and threatened to rain in a few hours if the storm did not pass south of here like they usually did. Still it would be a good idea to keep an eye on the weather in case it got bad. Until then though, it was time to bury my trash in a place about three miles away where if it was found would give no clue to my location.

 

With trash in hand the burial site for all my trash soon came into sight along with a pair of dirt bike riders goofing around on their bikes not far from a pair of trucks. With the riders close by it was time to change course before they spotted me and decided to follow me on the ground to where my hiding place was at.

 

They never looked up as I flew over them and climbed up higher into the sky then banked into a turn to find another quick burial spot a few miles away and not likely to be discovered quickly. A few minutes of flying and the perfect spot was found a few miles east of the other trash burial spot. After a quick landing and burying of the trash it was once more time to head back to the hideaway sanctuary of the old church.

 

Once again it took only a few minutes of flying to return to the old church and to watch the storm pass to the south of here and to the north as well. It was very pretty sight with the sun turning the sky orange and red as it shined through the clouds. With no time wasted I grabbed my colored chalks and sketchpad to make a couple of quick sketches of the storm as reference for a painting idea.

 

Five sketches and and two hours later it was time to go back inside as the storm was finally closing in over this part of the desert. Even though the church was a bit of a hill, desert storms can be a bit dangerous at times and there was no reason for me to stand outside and get soaked when the church provided a perfectly good shelter from the weather.

 

It was not a big surprise to see it start raining a few minutes later but what was a big surprise was to hear a loud crash and a scream of pain from outside. At first it was nothing but silence and I dismissed it as my ears playing tricks on me. The doors opening to the church proved me wrong as a very pregnant young girl came staggering in holding her belly in pain. Not only was she obviously in labor but she was an avian just like me.

 

It was a shock to her as well when she looked up and saw me. “Help. Please..help..baby. She hit the floor again as heavy contractions hit her once more. She was obviously not American but at that time it did not matter to me. She was an avian like me and in labor, about to give birth out here in the middle of nowhere. With no clue how to deliver a baby there was nothing more to do but get her to my car and risk getting caught in a flood to get her into town.

 

A quick look outside shot that idea down as the land all around the church was flooded by the storm. Only one other option was possible and it was a spooky one but she needed help. My cell phone still had service even though it had not been used in over a month. The plan was paid up in full for a full year and they had not turned it off so they could trace my calls and find me was my guess.

 

I hesitated a moment then dialed the clinic at the college and prayed that the doctor would answer me and help me save this woman and her baby. There was definite relief when the doctor answered the phone. “Amelia?” “Yes. I have a pregnant woman here in front of me in labor and no way to get her to a hospital. She is going to have her baby so tell me what the hell to do to save her and the baby!”

 

Molly guided me through it all and an hour later the woman had given birth to a little girl. What bothered me was that she was bleeding badly still. A quick look at her side told me why. Someone had stabbed her and she had flown off to try to escape them. Molly guided me though the process of stitching the girl up and applying improvised bandages to her side.

 

“Amelia, she needs help. Tell me where you are and I'll come get all three of you. Things have changed here honey and you don't have to be alone anymore. Please let us help you.” “Things have changed doctor. They tried to burn me to death. They tried to beat me to death, They tried to poison me. They tried to shoot me. They tried to blow me up. Of course they have changed in such a short time!”

 

Tears rolled down my face as the woman holding her little girl in her arms looked at me and the paintings. “You..angel?” “No. I'm an avian just like you honey and like you they tried to kill me too.” “I showed her the scars on my side and then the ones on my wings where they had tried to burn me to death. She merely reached up to me and smiled as she stroked the side of my face gently.

 

You save Maria. Take her when gone I am.” It took me a second to realize that she thought she was going to die here and was asking me to take care of her baby girl for her. “Molly, do you know how to find the old Saint Maria church? That's where I'm at. This girl does not look so good and I think she wants me to raise her daughter for her. She can't fly in the shape she's in.”

 

“Give me an hour and I'll meet you there in my vehicle. I'll break every speed limit to get there so just hold on and keep her awake so she does not go into shock!” It was a terrifying 58 minutes of waiting before Molly showed up in a huge four wheel drive monster of a hummer. Mud was splattered all over it and it still had the old military paint scheme on it.

 

She rushed in and sent me out after the portable generator and other gear. She got the generator going and hooked up some lights and other items while working at a feverish pace. Within minutes she had two bottles of plasma flowing into the girl and some pain medication. She smiled at the girl and spoke in fluent Spanish to her about what she was going to do to help save her.

 

The hot knocked the girl out and I held the little baby in my arms as Molly did emergency surgery on the girl to stop internal bleeding. Two hours later she had the incision sewed shut and was stringing two bottles of type O blood. “Help me get her in my beast. She needs a hospital and fast!”

 

It was a hair raising and bumpy ride to the main road. Twice water flowed up almost to the doors as Molly plowed through it and kept going as fast as she could in her beast of a vehicle. Once on the main road molly turned on her emergency radio system and called the hospital. “This is molly from thw college. I have a female avian about 19 years of age who has just given birth and has been stabbed in the side. Bleeding has been stopped through emergency field surgery. On my way now and request emergency escort. Passing mile marker 33 right now.”

 

Ten minutes later we had a highway patrol escorting us in with lights and siren going to clear the way for us. Even with an escort it took us almost 35 minutes to get to a hospital with all the traffic and the idiot drivers cutting us off twice despite an escort. Once there they wasted no time in putting her on a gurney and wheeling her in back while the baby slept peacefully in my arms.

 

Upon looking down at this little miracle she seemed so tiny and so helpless. She reminded me of myself. Molly had me follow her into an exam room and had the baby weighed, measured, and thoroughly looked over. When the birth certificate was brought to me Molly had me sign it as the legal partner of the girl. “I know you are not a lesbian, but if she does not make it then this little one needs someone to look after her.

 

I would much rather see her raised by someone who is an avian as well and will love her. You fit the bill perfectly.” “But I don't know a thing about raising children! I've never even changed a baby diaper before!” “The diapers are easy. They are just smaller than what you use is all. Now don't worry, it's all just a formality in case something happens.”

 

Reluctantly it seems that the little girl was now going to a part of my life for a little while until her mother recovered and could take care of her. It was surprising that the baby was so silent in my arms when she screamed and cried in anyone else's arms. Still, it would be nice when this mess was done and over with and my responsibility to this child was over. It was time to find a new place since Molly knew about the church.

 

My wings ached and it felt good to just sit down and relax in a chair with the little one in my arms. Molly smiled and left the room for a while to check in on her other patient. During this time sleep claimed me as my body reclined in the rocking chair and the little one in my arms slept peacefully.

 

A scream from Maria woke me up instantly. A nurse was simply gently putting her in a carrier for me and Maria did not like the idea of being separated from me. Once I leaned over and gently parted the blankets and gave her a bottle she quieted down. As long as she could see me it was quiet. Soon enough she finally fell asleep as I finished burping her and then rocking her to sleep gently.

 

Molly came in an hour later to find me holding the little one in my arms again and siting in the rocking chair with her. Like it or not, this little one seemed to do something odd to me. It was not easy to tell why she made me so possessive of her but that is how it was for me at the time. At the time there was no clue of just how much this little baby would change my life.

 

“Amelia, we need to talk for a few minutes. The girl..Marisa, she did not make it. Her hearts stopped just a few minutes after we brought her in and we could not revive her. She lost too much blood and went into shock. Between being stabbed then flying off and giving birth it was too much for her. I'm so sorry Amelia.” It took a moment for this to sink in. “So now what? Does she have any family we can contact? What about the father?” “I have already set the process in motion of finding her family and the father of the baby. For now though, you are the best hope this little girl has. She has already bonded heavily to you. Congratulations Amelia. You are now a mother.”

END PART FOUR

PART FIVE

A mother?! How could I be a mother. It made my head spin thinking about the things this child would need and me having no idea of how to get her what she needs and no clue how to take care of an infant. How did she manage to rope me into this situation? My mind was whirling as Molly gently got me to lay down next to the carrier so she could change my soaked diaper for me since my mind was not in the here and now at the moment.

 

Molly seemed to know what my brain was thinking and cut me off before a single word was uttered. “I'm two months pregnant already Amelia and have a three year year old at home already. There is no way that Maria would accept me as a mother no matter how much I might try. She would know the difference instinctively and it would not be good for her or me. Let me show you what she hears when you hold her.”

 

Molly put a stethoscope to my chest and then let me listen. There was a distinct sound of two hearts

beating in perfect rhythm. It was a sound that anyone who is an avian is used to hearing. “A human has only one heart that has a heavy beat rhythm. As far as Maria, she has chosen you as her new mother. You were there when she was born. Her mother was an avian. You are an avian. You need each other honey.

 

“You made your point, but that does not make it any easier on me. It's not like they will stop trying to hurt and kill me just because there is a baby involved now. The baby is an avian as well and once they know this then it will make them want to try all that much more to hurt us both and eventually kill us. You have my records. You know what they did to me before trying to go to school and then during my foolish attempts at going to school here. They tried to burn me to death in broad daylight! What's to stop them from trying that again?”

 

“Close your eyes a moment and relax without making any sounds. What do you feel?” “Fear, confusion, and something else I can't put a finger on just yet. A longing for something, but what?” “Open your eyes honey. Now humor an insane doctor and hold that little girl in your arms.” Maria seemed to almost let out a sigh as I held in my arms. Our gazes locked and for a moment it seemed like we were one person as she looked sleepily into my eyes full of fear and confusion and at the same time, something else as well.

 

“You win, for now. She can come with me.” Molly smiled as she walked out to get the paperwork started for numerous programs to help me and the little girl in my arms. After a few minutes of internal debate my own fears won out. It was too soon to trust anyone that might later turn on me and hurt me. With this in mind a back route was taken out of the hospital. Maria simply slept quietly while in my arms.

 

Once outside it was easy for me to take to the air. There were things that would be needed for the baby and the only place open this late at night was a very public and sometimes busy super store with a good number of people in it at any time. Time was not on my side and therefore it was in my best interest to go in, get a few quick things for Maria then leave before someone tried to stop me.

 

It was a bit spooky walking into the store with my wings in full view of everyone but there was a need for haste so it was with this in mind that my wings were not hidden. Several people watched as supplies were picked up for Maria by me. Diapers, wipes, bottles, formula, a few more blankets and a pacifier for her as well. On my way through the store my sight spotted a special harness for carrying babies like a backpack but in front of you instead of on your back.

 

Four different designs would not work because of my wings but they had one on clearance that was designed especially for avians. A lady stocking the area saw me and smiled. “That's a good choice for you ma'am. Let me help you get hooked into it. My manager accidentally ordered it six months ago and has been hoping someone would buy it.”

 

The elderly lady smiled at Maria as she helped Amelia get the carrier on and adjusted for a perfect fit. A few moments later Maria was in the harness and sound asleep against me. After a few more minutes of getting what was needed it was time to make my way to the front of the store to pay for the few things to tide me over until the next trip into a town with my car.

 

The man at the cash register stared at my wings as everything was put onto the counter to be paid for and then bagged up. The man was cute, but nothing would convince me to let my guard down and trust anyone too much. The last thing to be scanned was the harness. I pulled the tag off and handed it to the man so it could be scanned and added to the cost.

 

Everyone seemed to stop and stare at me as they saw my wings. It is not common to see an avian as we tend to keep to ourselves in an attempt to avoid problems with others. One pair of young girls with expensive clothes kept making rude little comments and jokes as my purchases were paid for. “Hey lady, going to a Halloween party?” They seemed to think this was funny and kept making rude remarks about my wings being cheap decorations and a desperate attempt to get attention.

 

It was people like this that make life difficult for all avians. It would do not good to say anything to them so the next best thing to smacking them around a bit was to just ignore them and continue on peacefully with my business in an effort to avoid problems. One can only hope that one day they grow up and learn to keep comments to themselves.

 

Once everything was paid for my path was straight to the exit doors with the two girls following behind me a few feet making comments and jokes about my wings falling apart or glue dripping from them. Some people are idiots and nothing is ever going to change that. It was a relief to get outside and into the open where my wings could carry me up and into the sky.

 

It felt good to get away from all the stares from everyone and outside. The girls laughed and were in the middle of saying something about my plastic feathers when I finally spread my wings fully and then took to the sky as they stood on the ground watching with open mouths and wide eyes while my wings flapped as was normal for an avian taking off.

 

It felt good to be in the sky once more. The added pieces of the harness supported Maria's head as we flew on towards the church. It was relaxing to be in the sly with no one to pester me and to have time to think in solitude. Not once during the entire flight did Maria cry or fuss. If anything, the flying seemed to calm her and lull her into a deep sleep.

 

Once back at the church it hit me that this had been a long and exhausting day for me. It had not been my desire to become a mother and yet here I was with Maria snuggled up against me and two arm loads of baby supplies. It felt odd and relaxing at the same time to get back inside the little church in the middle of nowhere. This place seemed almost like it welcomed me back.

 

The baby supplies were put onto one of the front pews for easy access when they would be needed. With this done it was time to set Maria down for a few minutes so my own diaper could be changed again before we both went to bed for the night. For her first day in the world she had certainly accomplished some massive life changing events.

 

A bottle was made for her and brought up with me and her after my diaper change was completed. The used diaper was rolled into a plastic bag for the night and would be disposed of in the daylight. There were enough supplies here to last a few days but it my guess that Molly would show up in the daylight with wither paperwork or supplies, or most likely, both. The place was a mess from the emergency surgery but come daylight it would get cleaned up.

 

I laid all the blankets and padding on the floor where my bedding was as well and thus increased the size and thickness of the bed area by almost double. A few minutes later Maria was covered with blankets to keep her warm as she laid right next to me and sound asleep. My gaze fell upon her sleeping form and stayed there for a few minutes until finally sleep called to me and claimed me as my blankets were pulled up over me.

 

For just a moment it almost looked like Jeremiah had returned and was smiling down at me and Maria both. It was fatigue playing tricks on me and soon enough sleep overcame until in the early morning when a horrible smell woke me up. Not only was my diaper a loaded mess, Maria had loaded hers as well. It was going to be the first of many diaper changes ahead of me.

 

Changing my own diaper was something that was easy for me, but changing Maria's diaper was a little tricky at first as it had two small tapes versus mine which had four larger tapes, but the idea was the same and with practice it would become easier. Once she was cleaned up and changed I gave her a bottle and propped it up for her so my own ruined diaper could be changed.

 

It was a mess to say the least and took several wipes to clean up before finally taping a clean diaper into place. Maria sucked down her bottle and dozed off again as all the garbage was picked up and bagged for burial far from here. It took a while to make sure everything was picked up and during the entire process my mind was running at a million miles an hour.

 

What was going to happen if Maria's father and family could not be found? Who would take care of her and raise her? What would happen when social services decided to send her to a foster family with no clue on how to take care of an avian infant? My family had all been avians and knew how to help me until they were rounded up by the government and made to vanish. That was not going to happen to Maria. The government and social services were not taking her and making her life a mess like so many others.

 

The trash needed to be taken out and buried somewhere but leaving Maria alone was not an option with her being just an infant barely on her second day of life. It took a little work to get the carrier on and hooked up correctly so she could come with me. It was not a glorious thing but it needed to be done. Five minutes later we were in the air with the bag of trash. As usual, she slept the entire time we flew along to a good burial spot for the trash.

 

Maria stirred briefly while the hole was dug but stayed asleep through most of the digging. Once back up in the air she woke up and looked up at me as we flew together back to the church. I noticed and smiled at her and caressed her face gently for a few seconds as she drifted back off to sleep again. It was only my second day of being with Maria and already there was something special about her that put me at ease as well as made me nervous as hell.

 

A familiar vehicle was parked outside the church when we returned and began circling around to cut speed and land. Molly came out and looked around then saw me when she looked up. A few seconds later and the two of us landed next to Molly while she patiently waited and smiled at me. Once on the ground she reached out and gently caressed Maria's face for a moment before turning her attention to me.

 

“I brought you some supplies that you will need. I like the carrier you have on. That design is perfect for you and her. Care to give me a hand with getting some stuff inside?” “What did you do, but out an entire department store and bring it here?” “Just got a few items you should have need of I think. Come give me a hand and you'll like what I got you, and relax, no one followed me here.”

 

Her tracks came from a different route than the one my car took to get to the main road. She had taken a very long and rough route to make sure no one followed her. “I ditched a pair of reporters by taking the riverbed route. Called a tow truck for them and kept going for a good eight miles before finally coming this way. Was not an easy route to take, so help me unload.”

 

Molly would turn out to be a damned good friend in the future and my guide of sorts but at the moment I had no idea of just how she would affect me and help shape my life. She had brought me more art supplies, four bags of diapers for me and four bags of diapers for Maria as well. Unloading and putting everything away took us almost two hours. It is amazing the amount of stuff you can cram into a humvee and still have room for a driver.

 

“Thank you for the supplies, but how do you propose to power some of the items? There is no electricity out here or running water for that matter. All my water is in those watter bottles over there and now that Maria is here more will have to be brought in for her.” You forgot about the old generator already? That thing is very fuel efficient if all you need to do is run a mini refrigerator and use a small electric hot plate to cook with.

 

Now show me how you keep from going stir crazy all the way out here. You are isolated with no one but you and now Maria, so what keeps you sane?” “In a word, art. Under the choir loft is where all my finished paintings are stored. There are also chalk drawings and pencil sketches as well. The school has some that were given freely to them but it is not safe for me to go back there again. Now that Maria is in my care it would be insane to try to go back there and risk her life as well as mine.”

 

Molly looked at all the various paintings and drawings and seemed to like all of them until she got to one very dark and depressing painting. It was simply titled, “FORSAKEN”. Molly looked at it then turned to look at me. “When did you paint this?” “A few weeks ago. Long before Marisa showed up and brought me Maria. It was simply how I felt about life at the time and how everyone seemed out to get me.”

 

“You are an amazing artist! I have seen paintings in galleries that do not convey the emotion that these do. You could a fortune just with your artwork alone.” “You can take them all as far as I'm concerned except for the painting of my family. That is all that is left of them thanks to the government making them vanish in their slave camps. They were sold off to an overseas buyer and have never been heard from since then. They were good people but it seems that is not enough to stop some greedy bastards from making a profit at any expense.”

 

Tears rolled down my face as the memories of them being dragged out of the house in chains by government agents while from my hiding spot in the trees I watched in fear then fled when they left with my parents. Molly hugged me gently. “I'm so sorry honey. I had no idea that you lost your parents to that illegal operation. You are entitled to a huge settlement fund you know. Maybe we can eventually find your parents honey, or at least where they are laid to rest if nothing else.”

 

Molly loaded up all the artwork except the one of my family and then helped me get the generator going so I would have power for the refrigerator and for the small electric hot plate and one single lamp she had brought for me. This would also allow me to charge my cell phone up again as it was almost dead. At the end of all this she laid me down gently and changed my diaper for me before leaving.

 

The experience was very pleasant and a little bit erotic as well. A part of me wanted more but it took me very little effort to remind myself that for a freak like me there could be no one. There was also the fact that Maria was now in my care for the foreseeable future and it would not be good to get all emotional when Maria needed me and there was no way Molly would feel the same way towards me.

 

Once Molly left it was time to make a quick check on Maria and make sure she was still doing okay and not in need of a change or wanting some attention. Maria was still sound asleep which was fine with me. A quick check found her to be wet but nothing drastic yet so I made quick work of changing her as she quietly slept. Once this was done it was time to get some painting done.

 

It took a few minutes to get everything set up and ready and then a few moments break to check on Maria to find her waking up and wanting some attention. She smiled at me as she was picked up and held and talked softly to. I laid her down for a few minutes and let her watch as the carrier was picked up and put on so she could be next to me. She seemed to somehow know what was going on and watched the entire process of me arguing with the carrier until it was finally on correctly.

 

Maria smiled again when picked up and carefully set inside the carrier so she could be next to me as work was made on my newest painting. It took a few minutes to get the image started on the canvas but it was going to be worth it to do this for Maria so she would know what her mother looked like before she passed away.

 

Without interruptions to slow the work down it would not take me long to get the majority of the painting done before having to stop for another diaper change. My own diaper was almost ready to leak and Maria needed a fresh diaper as well by this time. Maria was changed first and then my own soaked diaper was removed and replaced with a clean one.

 

Maria started yawning so I laid her back down with a fresh bottle and she quickly drifted off to sleep as work on the painting continued. The light was beginning to fade outside as the last touches were put on the painting. Maria had to be changed and fed once more and my own diaper had to be removed as it was a mess and stank badly.

 

After cleaning us both up it was time to go for a quick flight to not only stretch my wings but to dispose of the garbage. With Maria safely in the carrier strapped to my body and the trash bag in the other it was time to get into the air for a bit. The heat from the desert was rising up as my wings helped me gain altitude. It was a perfect night for flying and so after the trash was buried that was exactly what was done for a bit before it was time to get some rest for the night.

 

Once back on the ground and inside the church Maria yawned sleepily and it made me smile to see her looking content and peaceful. After getting her a bottle and making her comfortable it was time for me to put the painting and supplies away so they would not be in the way when getting up to make an occasional diaper change.

 

Everything was put away, the generator checked and it's fuel tank topped off before finally going to bed for the night next to Maria. My sleep was interrupted by very interesting dreams of molly and a very erotic diaper change that left me wet in more ways than one. Maria was sound asleep and doing fine so with her being fine it was a quick and quiet diaper change before going back to sleep wondering about the odd dream.

 

Once asleep it was peaceful again with no unusual thoughts of Molly or anyone else. Maria woke me up with her fussing and crying. A quick check of her and it was obvious she needed a quick change. After changing her and getting her a fresh bottle she settled back down again and soon fell asleep again while I watched over her.

 

Once she fell asleep it was time to begin working on another painting or perhaps another drawing. As my supplies were being rounded up it made me wonder what Molly wanted with all the paintings she had been given by me. Hopefully she would not reveal my hiding place to the assholes that wanted me dead. That thought brought unpleasant thoughts to my head. For perhaps the billionth time the attacks came back to mind.

 

The thoughts of the three that had been accidentally killed while attacking me in an effort to kill me. Could something different have been done? The attack on me at the school and the attempted suicide haunted my mind as well. Why did every decision made by me have to come back to haunt me? Why couldn't the world just let me be? It made me almost want to just end it all to end the pain but there was a very innocent little girl who deserved a chance at life even if my own life was a mess.

 

My painting was started as my thoughts wandered over the events of my life and how everything seemed to be a mess with me on the receiving end of the hatred, anger, and violence. It made me wonder why the world hated me and all avians so much? All we ever did was tried to fit in peacefully and not offend anyone, and yet the world seemed to take offense at our very existence.

 

It makes me wonder if it is even worth it to continue on sometimes. What reason did a person like me have to continue to exist when the whole world hated me simply because of my wings. The only thing that kept me alive was a certain baby little girl who was innocent and deserved the chance to grow up and try to find her own place in this fucked up world.

 

My diaper was hanging low between my legs so it was time to change it before getting a diaper rash. This break gave me a chance to check on Maria and make sure she was fine as well. Maria was starting to wake up as my wet diaper was being changed. While changing myself it was hard to keep my mind off of the diaper change that Molly had helped me with. Only a cry from Maria brought me back to my senses.

 

Maria was hungry so after setting down and giving her a bottle she relaxed once more in my arms. While holding her it was time to take a look at what my messed up brain had been painting while my mind wandered. It shocked the hell out of me to see that it was picture of me with Maria in my arms. My wings were spread wide and at an upward angle as if ready for me to take to the sky.

 

The sun was in the background just above my wingtips and shining down on us both while My face looked down at Maria smiling at her as she smiled back at me. It was a simple painting and yet it seemed to convey a message to me. Still, the painting seemed unfinished. Something was missing from it but the question of what would not be answered until my mind was allowed to wander while the painting was worked on.

 

Maria did not want to be laid back down again so it an easy situation to resolve. A few minutes later she was in the special carrier and sitting comfortably in it hanging just below my neck with a look of contentment as she sucked on a pacifier. With this situation resolved it was time to let my conscious mind wander again as my subconscious worked on the painting.

 

Three diaper changes later and the painting was finally finished. The missing piece was surprising to say the least. Standing next to me was Molly. She looked happy as she leaned her head on my shoulder and my arm was wrapped around her waist. What the hell was wrong with me that a painting like this would come out of my fucked up brain?

 

It was tempting to destroy the thing but a part of me took over and guided my hand to the finishing touches. A title was put on the painting and then my signature along with the date finished it off. The title was simply one word. “Complete” was the title on the painting. What the hell did that mean? This just served to confirm that it would have been for the best if they had not brought me back to life again after hanging myself.

 

I set the painting outside to dry in the sunlight and desert heat. The shaded side of the building was where the painting was set at so it would not dry too fast and ruin it, although it might not be a bad thing if it did get wrecked. That would give me a good reason to burn the thing and get rid of the damned crazy image that made no sense to me. Sure, Molly is extremely gorgeous but she would never be interested in a freak like me. If she saw the painting that would end things instantly.

 

Sighing, I made my way with the painting to the sunny side of the building and set the painting there to dry and be cooked to ruin by the hot sun. That would be the excuse needed to get rid of it since the heat would wreck it. With this done it was time to get a little air time after changing Maria who had chosen this as a perfect time to load her diaper with a smelly mess.

 

With the change done and the trash rounded up there was a good reason to go flying for a little bit. IT would do me good to get some time in the air to clear my messed up head and get rid of the confusion that plagued me. It would also do Maria some good as well since one day she herself would be flying under her own power. It was with this in mind that we took off for a place to bury the trash and then fly for a while.

 

Maria seemed to love flying with me and was awake through all of it and looked at everything with a look of wonder in her eyes and a smile on her little face. Any human child would be terrified but Maria seemed to love it and I know it was always a peaceful experience for me as well. It was my hope that the flight would clear up my mind and tell me what to do about the mess of mixed emotions in my brain.

 

Off in the distance another storm was brewing and it seemed to me that it mirrored the confusion in my own mind. The turbulent winds and the deadly lightning striking the ground as the storm poured life giving rain from the dark clouds into the thirsty ground. A wide banking turn kept us both out of the path of the large storm and safe by a large margin.

 

Maria was enjoying the entire flight and was wide awake as we flew over the desert and then slowly began a wide banking turn to get back to the shelter of the church before the storm did reach this part of the desert. The storm still kept piling in and seemed to covering more than just a few miles as originally thought. A quick look back confirmed that it was a massive storm and a very bad one.

 

“Well my dear little one, it is best that we return to the shelter of the church and wait out the storm where it will be safe for us. Maybe tomorrow if it is safe to go out we can get out and go flying more my dear little one. Her only answer was a grunt and then a sigh of relief as she messed her diaper. “You little stinker! You just wait until we get back to the church! You sure pick the worst places to mess yourself little one.”

 

She just continued to smile at me as we flew on towards the church and shelter from the coming storm outside. It offered no shelter from the storm raging in my own turbulent mind. My thoughts drifted back to Maria's mother and then to Molly as we flew in a shallow descending path towards the church while the wind picked up. Looking at the people packing up their bikes and dune buggies as we flew over made me wonder just how bad the storm really was.

 

Normally they ignored the storms and took their time but this time they were loading up and quickly leaving the desert for the comfort of the city. We quickly flew on and ignored anyone who happened to glance up and into the sky where we were flying over. It was risky but this was the quickest route back to the safety of the church and with the storm closing in that was the best place to be.

 

Molly showed up a few minutes after Amelia and Maria went for some flying and spotted the painting sitting in the shade of the church to dry. She walked over to the painting and thought it odd that Amelia would have stayed in the air when setting the painting down here in the shade to dry. There were no footprints in the sandy ground so she must have been flying and had decided to set it here and then go on flying some more. Molly shrugged her shoulders and walked around to see what Amelia had painted.

 

Molly stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the painting. She needed time to think about the meaning of the painting so she simply dropped off some supplies and some more fuel for the generator. She could wait to talk to Amelia until she knew what she wanted as well. Her heart felt confused as she looked at the painting another few minutes before turning to leave and then stopping again.

 

The painting was beautiful and it made her wonder just exactly how Amelia felt towards her and what the hell she was going to do about it. Amelia was six years younger than her and was a mother to an adopted little girl. The whole situation was confusing to say the least and made her suddenly feel very frightened and alone.

 

We were almost five miles from the church when the first drops of rain began to fall on us. Maria got hit by a small drop of rain and had the most confused look on her face that made me laugh. “It''s raining my dear child. Fear not, Home is close by and we will be inside and safe long before the rain gets heavy.”

 

When we were almost a mile from the church my flight path began to consist of banking turns that quickly shed airspeed and seemed to amuse Maria. If an avian chose to do so, they could come to an almost complete stop in a matter of a few seconds by flaring their wings out all the way and standing almost straight up so the wings were vertical and acting like huge air brakes.

 

When we do that though, it is hard on the wings if you are not in good shape and can pull the hell out of the muscles then leave you sore and stiff for a few days. As we were coming in for a final landing Molly was driving back towards the main road at high speed. “Looks like she's trying to beat the storm. Guess we just missed her.” The next thing that went through my mind was the painting. This was followed by my next thought of , “OH SHIT!”

 

If she saw the painting then she would never come back and we would both of us be fucked but good! Why the hell did I paint something like that?! What the hell was going through my fucked up brain to make me do that?! How the hell to explain this to her? What to tell her to make her forgive me for being so damned stupid. “Why do you hate me God? What happened to make you hate me so much?”

 

The rain masked the tears coming down my face as we landed. Had Maria not started crying then It is almost certain that despair would have taken over and forced me to try ending my life once more. Her cries got me moving quickly out of the rain. We passed the painting and for some reason I snatched it up and brought it in with me.

 

It was a mild shock to see Jeremy standing at the door with a pair of towels for us both. “Quickly dear child! Come in out of the rain before you both get sick! Jeremy smiled and held onto Maria as I dried off. Maria smiled at him and fell asleep in his arms. “Now go get changed into a clean diaper before you get a rash miss. I'll change little miss Maria for you while you get changed yourself.”

 

He made me chuckle as he struggled with changing Maria's diaper and trying to clean her up. The man was nice but in way over his head. It took him a few minutes to figure out how to use wet wipes and then a few more minutes to get the diaper taped on Maria correctly. I don't think he has ever changed a disposable diaper before. If just two tapes on a baby diaper gave him a fit then it would be interesting to see him trying to change my huge diaper sometime with it's four tapes.

 

Jeremy fed Maria a bottle and then burped her like an old pro. My mind was was ablaze with concern for Molly and in that haze of frightened thoughts Jeremy picked up the painting and looked at it. An amazing thing the mind. Sometimes it knows better than you think as to what you truly desire. Perhaps the differences are not so great as you think.”

 

When he set the painting down and came over to me, my mind was still reeling with confusion. Dear child, go get some sleep and let old Jeremy watch over you and this lovely church for a while. You need the sleep to clear the confusion from your mind dear child. Myself, I no longer require sleep like I once did. Now go get some rest dear one.”

 

There was something odd about him but his voice and commands seemed hypnotic and irresistible. Within a few minutes both Maria and I were settled down for some much needed sleep while he simply smiled at us and seemed to my fog and sleep dulled mind to merely fade away as if he had never been there. Perhaps in the morning Molly would call and want to talk to me or perhaps she could be reached and reasoned with by me.

END PART FIVE

 

PART SIX

The drive back gave Molly time to think but did no good as she was just as confused as ever. The dampness between her legs was driving her crazy and was very dangerously distracting to her. Twice she almost went off the road thinking about the last time she changed Amelia. Since the first moment she had met Amelia she had felt something and it was nerve wracking. She wanted to be near Amelia and to help her but it more than just that.

 

Once she finally returned to the city she called to check if there were any students needing anything before she went and called it a night. With no appointments and no emergencies she went home instead of going back to the clinic and finishing up paperwork like she normally did. The last two miles had seemed to take an eternity with the heavy rain pelting down and limiting visibility. Traffic slowed to a crawl and then finally a stop.

 

The road ahead was flooded and police were turning everyone around. Molly cursed to herself and wished she had fully working wings again like Amelia at times so she could just fly over the mess and go home. Slowly she got her big beast turned around and decided that since most the roads to her house were flooded she would just get some sleep at the clinic. It took her almost 45 minutes to get to the clinic with the bad rain and flooded roads.

 

Her hand kept drifting down to between her legs as her thoughts drifted to Amelia. “Damn it! How the hell am I going to resolve this mess? What am I going to do?” She stopped herself short of hitting her peak and then made a run from her vehicle to the clinic. By the time she got inside she was soaked from more than just the rain.

 

Once inside the clinic Molly made her way to her office and got out her spare change of clothes. She had kept a change of clothes ever since she'd been forced to do an overnight stay to watch over a critically ill patient that was too unstable to move. It was convenient for times like this when an unexpected storm would catch her by surprise. Of course the storm was not the only thing to catch her by surprise today and she wondered what to do about the situation as she laid down on a couch in her office and drifted off to sleep.

 

Molly tossed and turned as her dreams were haunted by dreams of Amelia kissing and making love to her. The dreams left her panties soaked and her dark slacks in need of rinsing out before the smell set in. Molly got up and looked around, noting it was only about 4:30 in the morning. She noticed the soaked panties and stained slacks then let out a sigh of frustration. Without thinking twice about it she removed her slacks and soaked panties then went into the exam room.

 

Using sterile wipes she cleaned herself off then used the sink to rinse her panties before hanging them in the storage closet to dry. She grabbed her dark slacks and then went back into the exam room for one final addition to her wardrobe. “If anyone finds out about this I'll be the laughing stock of the campus. She carefully unfolded the adult diaper and positioned it carefully before taping it securely in place.

 

It felt thick and unusual after not having worn one in almost ten years. The diaper brought back memories of the horrible accident all those years ago. She had not seen the car run the light and had started to cross the street The car thief never even tried to slow down and slammed into her at almost 45 miles an hour, forever crippling her.

 

The bone sickening crunch as the truck hit her before she could get out of the way. She was thrown into the air and she instinctively tried to fly off only to find her wings both shattered horribly as she fell back to the pavement as the police car slammed on his brakes and hit her anyways as she came down and was thrown under the car.

 

The hospital had given her less than a 2% chance of living with the laundry list of injuries to her body but against all odds she lived but was forever crippled. She would never fly again and would forever have bladder and bowel control issues. Even before the accident she had been attracted to women but her parents thought it was the accident that made her a lesbian. They had known that she was on her way to her girlfriends house at the time of the accident.

 

It took her almost a year to get out of diapers again and back to panties and light pads for bladder issues. She had not gone on any dates or had another girlfriend since then. When Amelia showed up she thought she had gotten it out of her system. She was wrong. One look at Amelia's perfect body, the long legs, the perfect breasts, the perfect face and so kissable lips and then the wings that perfected the whole image and she was instantly in lust again.

 

It took a great deal of control to stay professional and not take advantage of the girl since she was certain that Amelia was straight. The painting shocked and frightened her as she had been thinking the exact same thing for some time but was afraid of the consequences. With her slacks finally on and a dry shirt carefully tucked in to hide the diaper she had on she sat down in her office and got started on finishing up the paperwork she had been needing to get done.

 

He wings were aching from the damp weather but there was no use in trying to ease the ache in them since nothing worked and the bone structure had been too badly mangled and put together so she would never be able to fly again. Still, with no one around she lifted her shirt and undid the bindings holding her wings down tightly against her back. A slow and careful stretch of the now deformed wings eased the ache but made her want to go flying so badly.

Molly finished her paperwork and then shut down the computer and turned off her phone before laying down on the couch in her office. The crinkle of the diaper seemed so loud but in reality she knew it was just some old insecurities playing on her fears. Within a few minutes she was sound asleep on her couch in her office. She never noticed as an elderly man smiled at her and covered her with a blanket. “Poor dear. So much confusion and so much self doubt. Listen now to old Jeremy. Follow your heart dear child and it will show you the way.” A moment later he walked off a few feet and into the shadows where he seemed to vanish.

 

Amelia woke up as the sunlight was shining in through the stained glass windows of the little church. Maria was sleeping soundly and peacefully. Amelia smiled at her and checked her diaper. After changing Maria she then got on with the business of changing her own diaper. The change seemed to take forever as she thought of Molly and the painting. After finally getting her diaper on tight she looked at her phone then finally made a decision.

 

Amelia dialed Molly's number and was worried when her call went straight to a voice message. “Molly, this is Amelia. Please call me back so we can talk. I know you saw the painting and you are confused about it but please just call me so we can talk.” Amelia hung up her phone and sighed as she made a fresh bottle for Maria and then warmed it up for her. Maria woke up as Amelia showed up with the bottle.

 

She smiled and spoke softly to Maria. Here you go honey. Breakfast is served. Maria took the bottle and quietly began drinking it as Amelia held her in her arms and walked around with her. Having Maria in her arms felt right and seemed to calm her down. As she walked she spoke out loud to herself. “Why did she have to see that stupid painting? Of all the damned fool things for me to paint! What must she think of me after seeing that? There's no way she'd ever want a freak like me. Not even likely she even feels that way about me. Of all the women to fall in love with it had to be her! Damn it I'm an idiot! A lovestruck fool.”

 

Maria drained her bottle and Amelia burped her a few moments later. “My dear little one, we need some air time. It's a very nice day outside and the storm is long since over so let's go flying so we can think while we get rid of our trash.” Amelia rounded up a few used diapers and a few other minor bits of trash then put on the infant carrier. Ten minutes later we were both in the air and flying towards one of the five places that was used by me for burying the trash.

 

Maria fell asleep a few minutes into our flight and there was no rush for me to get to where the trash could be disposed of and not traced back to the tiny church. It was inconvenient but safer this way. If anyone other than molly knew of where my hiding place was they would hunt me and Maria down and kill us both. Anyone trying to kill Maria was going to have a hell of a fight on their hands from me and this time there would be no holding back in an effort to not kill or severely hurt anyone.

 

With the trash buried and nothing needing to be done at the church it was time to decide if it was perhaps time to move on to another place and this time start over where no one knew her. It was not the first time she had thought of doing this but with a little one to care for it would complicate things for her. Did she have any real family and were they even now looking for her? What would they think of her taking care of Marisa's baby? Where was the father at and why did Marisa show up in the middle of a storm bleeding to death from a stab wound? What had happened to to her? Who had attacked her and were they perhaps looking to find her to finish her off if she was still alive?

 

The sound of a dirt bike coming closer brought her out of her daze and back to reality real fast. Without hesitation my wings spread wide and carried both of us to the safety of the sky before whoever was on the motorcycle could catch them both on the ground. The rider almost wrecked when he saw Amelia suddenly fly up from the ground and into the sky less than 100 feet from him as he came over the small hill that had blocked his sight from this area.

 

The man watched in awe as she flew straight up into the sky and was soon lost to the few clouds in the sky. After a few minutes of scanning the sky he simply turned around and went back the way he came, eager to tell his friends what he had seen. They would of course never believe him but it was a sight he would never forget.

 

The flight back to the church seemed long and eternal and yet too short at the same time. When the church finally came into sight there was no sign of Molly but then it would be too much to ask for her to show up and want to talk to me about the whole mess of a situation. As much as a part of me wanted to destroy the painting and blame it on the painting it was not to be. The painting was not to blame for the situation. The painting had just been a reflection of a part of me that has long been held in check

 

In all my years not once has anyone ever found out about me being a lesbian and now in one cruel and final twist of the figurative knife in my back, the one person who was wanted by me was the one person that found out and wanted nothing to do with me now. It hurt but this was just another lesson that needed to be slammed home to get through my thick head. Yet even more proof that there was no one for a diaper wearing freak like myself.

 

Had it not been for Maria needing a mother then this church would no longer be my haven. Out of stupidity and desperation I placed another call to Molly. The phone rang numerous times and finally went to her voice mail. “Molly. It's me again. Please, talk to me. Let me try to explain this. Yell at me and insult me. Something. Anything, but please, don't ignore me like a ghost or something that does not exist.”

 

After the call there was only the silence as Maria was changed once more then laid back down gently to sleep some more as my painting supplies were brought out and made ready to use. My three attempts at painting something were not worth keeping. My mind was too distracted today to work on a painting. Maria was sound asleep and comfortable so moving her was not an option in my mind. Instead I grabbed my sketch pad and started working on a couple of drawings.

 

All three of my drawings featured Molly in them and it was frustrating to finally find someone that could be so right and to fuck it up in such a stupid way as to ruin even a possible friendship. All this was just more proof of what a fucked up freak that the world perceived me to be. How could I have been so stupid ? It made me wish that there was an easy way to just vanish to somewhere else where no one would find me and try to kill me.

 

If it was just me then it would be easy to leave and not be found, but Maria made that a difficult option as she would need to be near civilization for at least a few more years. She would need to go to school and have doctors visits to verify her health. There was also the matter of trying to get in touch with any remaining family of hers as well. She needed to know when she got older if she had any family left to get to know.

 

It would be tough getting all the documents she needed for Maria by herself but not impossible. She looked around the old church as she thought of all she would have to do to and found that a part of her liked this remote location in the middle of nowhere. She only had two visitors and no one was here to call her a freak or try to kill her. This little church was built very strongly to survive the elements year after year with no one around to maintain it until she decided to use it as her shelter and now she found herself thinking of it more as a home than a shelter or a church.

 

After a while she sat down and yawned as her mind tumbled over the issues of the past week and whether or not she really and truly wanted to return to civilization. Sure the location was remote and had no running water or electricity, but that could be fixed easily enough. Some solar panels and a small windmill would solve the electrical issue nicely. As for water, drilling a small well could be done and that would solve that issue.

 

Some of the issues she could handle herself with some research, but some of it would have to be handled by professional contractors and that meant letting someone know where she was at and then having the risk of them telling the wrong people. This would defeat the entire reason for her coming here in the first place. So many things had gone wrong in the past few months when she had tried to get a college education.

 

She tried to call Molly one more time but got her voice message as she yawned and hung up without leaving a message. She changed her wet diaper then laid down next to Maria to get some sleep and perhaps let her subconscious find a way to resolve the issues and perhaps finally she could find peace.

 

Molly had numerous erotic dreams about Amelia over the next number of weeks and her control began to get worse. She had gone from form wearing panty liners to wearing diapers full time as she kept wetting herself constantly. It was a slow time at the clinic for a change with only three pregnancy tests and one broken arm to deal with. This gave her plenty of time to think about how to talk to Amelia.

 

It had been several years since her last girlfriend had moved to another state and lost contact with her. She had been in diapers still but it only seemed to make their lovemaking sessions that much more kinky and intense. She had not felt this way again until Amelia came into her life. She had the most perfect figure and wings to match. She could imagine making love to her and making her wings quiver in delight as she hit her peak.

 

Molly cursed when she realized she had soaked her diaper again without realizing it. It took her a few minutes to get changed into a fresh diaper again and decide to give Amelia a call to try to talk to her about the whole damned mess. She had been able to hold her feelings in check until she saw the painting and that was the straw that broke the camel's back as it were.

 

With only an hour to go until the clinic closed she finished up her paperwork for the day and then finally closed the clinic for the day and made her way out to her black Humvee. She got in the vehicle and started the engine then slowly left the campus. At a stoplight she glanced down at her phone and began thinking of calling Amelia to try to explain things to her.

 

She picked up her phone then thought better of it and set it down again in time for the light to change, She started forward and slammed on her brakes as some idiot in a subcompact car ran the red light. The car barely missed her front bumper by a couple of inches as she cursed loudly at the driver of the other car then continued on towards the highway leading out of town and eventually to the turnoff.

 

As soon as the traffic cleared up she picked up her phone and was about to dial Amelia's number to talk to her when it rang. A quick glance told her it was Amelia as she pulled over to answer the number. Her heart was racing as she nervously answered the call. “Amelia? I think we need to talk. Are you home?” “I'm in the air right now with Maria for one last look around before we leave. Things have been awkward between us these last few weeks and it's my own stupid fault for painting that painting. It was not something you were supposed to see.”

 

Molly sighed and felt a stream of urine empty into her diaper as she tried to figure out what to say to Amelia without sounding like an idiot. “Where are you going? I'll meet you and we can talk.” “This call was just to leave you a message saying goodbye and apologizing for this whole mess. It's time to start over somewhere else where no one knows us. I know you probably don't want to do more than tell me off for thinking that way about you and I'm sorry it had to end this way. Have a good life Molly.”

 

“NO! Don't do this to me! I need you! Please don't go! I'm almost to the turnoff! Meet me and let me explain! It's important and I'm not mad at you about the painting! I promise I'm not mad or upset with you! Just please let me try to explain it to you and if you still want to leave after that then I wont stop you!” Amelia sighed and turned towards the main road.

 

“I'll meet you along the way then. I'll let you explain your side and maybe then I can at least see you in person one last time before we leave.” Amelia was reluctant and a bit afraid as she flew towards the main road where Molly was driving to meet her. She barely even noticed how wet her diaper was between her legs as she tried to think of ways to talk to Molly without all but attacking her sexually.

 

The main road and Molly were in sight as she came in lower to meet up with Molly after she pulled off the highway. The black Humvee was a welcomed and dreaded sight at the same time. What must must Molly think of her? She said she was not angry but what did that mean? “She must want to have one of those lets just be friends talks. Can't imagine she'd be interested in a diapered freak like me.”

 

Molly slowed down and used her turning signals after looking to make sure it was safe to turn. Halfway through the turn she was slammed into by a big green diesel tractor trailer combo that had not been paying attention to where he was going. Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion as the door glass shattered while the door pushed in.

 

She heard herself screaming in shock and pain as she was slammed into the steering wheel hard enough to daze her. She could hear the screeching sound of brakes and see the sun shaking and rotating violently as she was slammed around in her vehicle. She was slammed back by her seatbelt and then felt pain as her already deformed wings broke once again as she bounced around in the vehicle. The roof dented and threatened to give way and then soon enough it was all silent.

 

She could feel something trickling down off her head as she hung tangled in the seatbelt and twisted mass of metal that had been an expensive Humvee moments earlier. She could smell smoke but everything seemed fuzzy and disconnected as she set still wondering what had just happened.

 

Amelia was just about to tap on the passenger side door when the Big semi truck and trailer slammed into Molly and sent the car into a spin and then onto it's side before knocking it into the ditch before finally stopping. “Molly! NO!” Amelia's phone was in her hand in an instant

 

She hit 911 as fast as her shaking hands would let her. It seemed to take an eternity for an operator to answer the phone call. “I need an ambulance at mile marker 52 on East highway 42! A semi truck just slammed into a black Humvee. The Humvee is on it's side now and off the road smoking! Hurry!” The operator wanted to start asking stupid questions and Amelia had no patience to deal with idiotic people at the moment.

 

“I don't know what year the vehicles are! What the hell does it matter?! Just get some rescue workers out her fast! Of course I'm sure it's a Humvee now send help! No, I don't know what model of semi truck it was that hit her! Send fucking help now dam it! Oh shit! The Humvee is burning!” She hung up and landed next to the Humvee as the driver of the truck was getting out of his vehicle.

 

Without waiting for help Amelia tore open the driver's side door to get to Molly. Molly looked at Amelia and smiled as she reached out to stroke the side of her face. “I love you Amelia.” Molly passed out a half second later with a smile on her face as she hung limp in the wreckage. A quick yank of the seatbelt and Molly was free.

 

Molly did not respond as Amelia called out her name several times then finally ripped the back tailgate door off to use as a makeshift stretcher for Molly. She tore Molly's shirt and tied a strip around the head to staunch the flow of blood from a nasty cut on her forehead. She was carefully removing Molly when she noticed an odd shape on her back.

 

“What the hell are you wearing?” A quick look under the shirt to insure she was not going to break a special brace or anything shocked the hell out of her. Molly had wings! “Why didn't you tell me?” No answer came from Molly as she laid her on the tailgate door then used a ripped out seatbelt to strap her to it as best she could to keep her from moving.

 

She saw no sign of any ambulance. Police, or fire crews so she grabbed Molly and flew off with her towards the town almost 25 miles away. Maria merely stared down at Molly as they all flew on towards the hospital. It was odd how Avian children seemed to sense when to keep quiet when human children would be screaming for attention.

 

Amelia felt her diaper begin to leak as she flew to the nearest hospital as fast as she could with Molly tied to the makeshift litter. “Don't you dare die on me Molly! You have some serious explaining to do! You said you love me! I want you as well damn it so hang on and don't die!” The flight to the nearest hospital seemed to take forever but in reality took only about 35 minutes with her not having to worry about traffic and being able to fly in a straight line at full speed.

 

Amelia landed outside the emergency department and walked into the large room with Molly strapped down to the tailgate. Everyone stopped and stared as she walked to the admittance window. The nurse looked up and leaped out of her chair instantly. It took her maybe three seconds to come around from the back and start to look over Molly. She looked up and grabbed an emergency phone on the wall and dialed a code then spoke into it.

 

“This is Phylis, Code 9! I repeat, code 9!” She hung up the phone and grabbed a clipboard and began writing down every detail as fast as she could while waiting for a doctor and a gurney. She was asking Amelia for details when two doctors and three more nurses came running with a gurney for Molly. One of them was carrying a backboard as well. Amelia stepped out of the way as the nurse began to read her notes to the doctors.

 

It took the doctors and three other nurses almost two minutes to carefully undo the makeshift tie down and get Molly onto a backboard One of them noticed her wings and and called it out. She's an avian! Careful of the wings!” Another minute went by and they then rushed her into the back while Amelia told the remaining doctor and admittance nurse every detail.

 

“Is she going to make it?” The doctor smiled and then responded. “I think she's going to hurt for a while but those Humvee are tough vehicles so it most likely saved her life. We'll do everything we can to help her but for now you need to calm down and get changed before you leak anymore. Come on in back and I'll find you a change and get your little one a bottle as well.”

 

The doctor was a nice man and even Maria seemed to like him. I was given a clean diaper and a room to change. After that he helped me get a bottle for Maria as she was starting to fuss a little. “That's a nice carrier you have there. I might have to get one for my wife before I go home.” I looked at him a little funny for a moment then it hit me like a ton of bricks who he was.

 

The doctor was Marius. The oldest living avian on the planet at over 2000 years old. If he said molly was going to make it then it was a great relief to me. He stayed with me for the entire three hours I was in the emergency department waiting for word on molly's condition. Finally after a last quick check on Molly he took me to see her. She had a broken right arm and a bad gash on her head. There were numerous small cuts on her arms where she had shielded her face from the breaking glass.

 

I didn't hesitate when I saw her. I grabbed her and kissed her. She returned the kiss and it was perfect. Marius was holding Maria and examining her with a smile on his face. When I broke off the kiss Molly smiled at me. “Sorry about the mess these past few weeks. When they release me we can talk more.” “You're damned right we will! You never told me you were an avian! You have a lot of explaining to do! We can get in some air time together and you can tell me everything!”

 

“No we can't. I can't fly anymore. I have not flown in years since an accident mangled my wings too badly to ever allow me to fly again.” Marius handed Maria back to me gently then set about examining Molly's wings in detail. “I'm going to get a bunch of pictures of those wings of yours and we will see what we can do about putting them back together again.”

 

“That would be wonderful, but the last two doctors told me it was impossible to fix them again. They are stiff from not being used for flying but they don't hurt anymore.” “Fortunately for you I happen to know a bit about fixing wings up. Went through worse in world war two myself. Got caught in a bomb explosion and almost lost mine. The doctors and nurses were miracle workers and put me back together again. So you see, your situation is not hopeless.”

 

Molly was moved to a private room to rest two hours later. Maria and I had to leave an hour after that as visiting hours were over. Before leaving Molly grabbed me and pulled me to her for one hell of a goodnight kiss. “Amelia, I would like you to come back tomorrow with Maria please. I want to give her and you both a quick checkup. And don't forget to bring a couple of changes and other essentials as well.

 

I was dead tired when we left the hospital and not looking forward to the two hour flight back home. Regardless of how tired my body was there was still time for me to stop in the hospital chapel to pray for a friend. It was a surprise to see Jeremy as we went into the chapel. He looked up and smiled at us when he saw us. “My favorite two ladies. What brings you into this house of God on such a fine night?”

 

“A friend of mine was hurt in a car accident earlier. She's going to make it just fine, but she needs to have both of her wings rebuilt so she can fly again for the first time in several years. I hope you'll forgive, but speaking to God has never been something high on my list of priorities in the past few years. It has been very tough on me and if not for Maria here it could have been the end for me.”

 

“Come child. Sit and tell me everything. Let it all out and let God guide you to a better place.” It was a long three hour talk with him as he heard my life story and learned of the abuse that had happened to me recently. He was saddened when he learned of my attempted suicide. In the end he was right. It was a relief to let it all out and just cry my eyes out.

 

When all was said and done we prayed for Molly and for myself as well as for Maria. After that he recommended that we just go rent a motel room for the night rather than fly back exhausted and risk crashing. It was a good idea as we were both very tired from the stress of the day. Tomorrow they would x-ray Molly's wings to find out the damage before setting about repairing them.

 

On the way to a motel Maria and I stopped in a small all night store for more diapers, wipes, two bottles, a can of formula and a quick snack for myself. The lady at the counter was an older lady but so very nice to me. She refused to let me buy the cheapest diapers in the store for myself and led me to the back where she had a half bag of abena sitting on a store room shelf collecting dust.

 

“Take these for free dear. They have been sitting here for a number of months collecting dust so take them for free. We need the space for some other products coming in. Besides, I don't need them anymore since my last operation and I would rather they go to someone who needs them rather than get thrown out.” With a polite thank you to her she rang me up and even complimented my wings.

 

Maria of course had the lady wrapped around her little fingers. “She is a blessing. So young and full of promise. You take great care of that sweet little one now.” With a yawn we left the store and finally got to the motel for some sleep. The manager gave us a room at the normal price and once inside we were both in dire need of clean diapers.

 

With the change out of the way we crashed for the night. Maria had a bottle and I drank a soda before passing out for the night. My dreams were filled with images of Molly and I in some very interesting positions to put it politely. Come daybreak my diaper was wet from more than just being peed in. The dreams had been very intense and very pleasant. Maria was fussing about this time so a quick check of her found her in need of a clean diaper as well.

 

After changing her and giving her a bottle she was content to stay quiet as my own diaper was changed. After my diaper change was done a quick glance at the clock showed it to be just a little after 5:00 in the morning. The sun was peeking up over the horizon as everything was rounded up and made ready to go with me in a little bit when Maria and and I were both ready to go see Molly in the hospital.

 

She had a lot of explaining to do and it was my personal hope she would consent to another kiss. The one she gave me was fantastic. At a quarter to 8:00 we left the hotel room and made our way back to the hospital in time for visiting hours and to let Marius give both me and Maria a checkup. Our flight to the hospital was made without incident except for surprising a few people outside the motel when we took to the air'

 

Ten minutes later we landed at the hospital and drew stares from everyone as it was quite easy to see my wings. It was no use in trying to pretend to be human when I was definitely not human. The

elevator felt claustrophobic as it carried us to the seventh floor to see Molly. It was absolute chaos when the doors opened. Molly was performing CPR on a patient while the rest of the nurses scrambled to help other wounded patients.

 

It was literally a bloody mess as I looked around. Laying on the floor and obviously beyond help was a dead security guard. A shot and another scream sent me running down the hall without thinking about it until a bullet almost hit me and Maria. “Demon! Spawn of Satan! Whore! I send thee back to Hell!” Another shot barely missed me and passed a few scant millimeters from Maria. It took me all of maybe three seconds to run back to where Molly was helping save another patient.

 

Another shot rang out and barely missed us again as the ugly voice called out once more. “Unholy spawn of Satan! Burn in Hell slut!” The bullet hit me in the right leg and his second shot almost hit Maria again as I fell and screamed in pain. Molly pulled me behind the nurse's station and kissed me quickly. “The man's insane! We can't get to the phones without getting shot!”

 

My leg was bleeding and screaming like mad. Maria was wide awake and screaming in fear as well. “Suffer not a witch to live. The three of you shall all be sent back to Hell to burn! No matter how small you try to appear you shall not escape my holy vengeance!” That did it. I would forgive him trying to kill an adult in time, but Maria was a baby! She was a victim as much as everyone else here was.

 

“Molly, Hold Maria and watch over her if I don't make it back. I love you.” Before she could object she was handed Maria and kissed, then I was gone before she could try to stop me from my insane action. “Hey! You want a fight? Well now you've got one! Put the gun down and we'll settle this the right way. He spun and faced me raising his gun to fire at me. He never saw the phone come flying at him until it was too late to try to dodge.

 

His eyes went wide and a millisecond later the phone slammed into his face hard enough to knock him out and cave in the front of his skull. This is one time there was no regret in possibly killing someone intentionally. He threatened to kill Maria and that was unforgivable in my opinion. He hit the floor and the gun went off again. I screamed in pain as the bullet tore through my lower left arm.

 

Molly got to a phone and called for emergency help a second later. My leg and arm were screaming in pain at me and blood was everywhere as Molly forced me to sit so she could work on me to stop the bleeding before going on to other patients. The stairwell doors flew open and ten security guards came running with guns drawn while Molly put a heavy bandage over my arm wound and then another one on my leg wound.

 

She kissed me deeply one more time and was quickly off and running to try to save anyone else she could. Someone put Maria in my arms and this helped to quiet us both down as evidently I had been frantically calling out for Maria. Looking up from my state of near panic showed Jeremy smiling at me as he handed me Maria. “Take good care of your little girl. Marisa chose perfectly and is so very proud of you. As Maria has healed the hole in your heart, you must now heal the hole in Molly's heart. She needs you and you both need her. My time here is almost up. We will hopefully meet again someday, but for now there is another matter needing to be taken care of.”

 

The man with the gun was starting to wake up when Jeremy walked up to him. His eyes went wide when he saw Jeremy. “NO! Please! No!” Jeremy did not smile as he reached down and pulled out a shimmering form from the body. The man's body fell back and laid still as Jeremy looked at the thing he was holding. An unholy scream sounded as the thing Jeremy was holding burst into flames before Jeremy let go of it and it was sucked into some kind of blackness while screaming and burning.

 

A moment later Jeremy smiled at me one last time and vanished. Molly was calling my name and it took me a moment to come back around. “Don't you dare frighten me like that again! For a moment you went pale and stopped breathing! We need to get you to surgery. You have a bullet in your leg that needs to be removed.” She lifted me onto a gurney to be taken in for emergency surgery.

 

My hand flew out and grabbed her. She smiled, leaned over and kissed me as passionately as she could. “I will watch over Maria for you honey, so go get patched up. The shot they gave me knocked me out a few seconds later. When my senses returned to me someone was changing my diaper. A slight whiff told me it was an extremely unpleasant task this time. The nurse merely looked at me and smiled.

 

Molly came in a little while later once it was possible for me to remain fully awake. The first thing she did was to kiss me deeply then she handed me Maria. “You are going to be in here for about a week while you heal enough to be released. The man you hit with the phone is dead. You caved in the front of his skull with that hit. This time no one is going to press charges against you. He was wanted in 17 states for murder. As far as the police are concerned this incident is closed. When they heard about him threatening Maria before you got mad they felt you were crazy and he got what he deserved.

 

While you were asleep Maria helped me find some information on that strange man that appeared here at the end. That man has been dead for almost 90 years now. There are numerous reports of him showing up at times when someone needs him the most and he can help out a number of people at one time. Don;t quote me, but it is my suspicion that Jeremy is an angel of God and was sent here to help us be in the right place at the right time to prevent a massacre.

 

Let's face it, you make interesting friends it seems. He appeared to me a few weeks ago and talked to me about you. He's right, you need me. I also need and want you. When we get out of here we are going to have to figure this out before we both go anymore crazy. For now though, get some rest and heal. When you are strong enough then the surgery on my wings can be done. Maria is in my care until you heal though.”

 

They let me out of the hospital our days later with strict orders to stay off my feet for the next two weeks while the leg healed. This did not stop me from flying though as there was no way for me to not fly without going stir crazy. The orders to stay off my feet were obeyed with help From Molly who was there to catch me in her arms each time at the end of a flight.

 

We kept the affair a secret from the college as she suspected they would fire her if they knew we were intimate and considering getting married. She confessed her need for diapers to me as her bladder had finally given up any pretense of working right anymore. It did not bother me in the least as it led to some very interesting diaper changes.

 

It took my leg almost three months to be fully healed. Molly was there through the entire time and refused to leave my side when she was off duty. Maria loved her as much as she did me it seems. Once my leg was declared as fully healed and once again working good we celebrated by making love while Maria slept oblivious to us.

 

Six months after the hospital incident she got in touch with Marius and had him perform the surgery on her wings to rebuild them. The operation took Marius and four other doctors a grueling 39 hours to complete. When she was brought out of surgery both of her lovely brown wings were in heavy bandages and splints. Marius yawned as he shook my hand. Congratulations to you both.” My mind was confused when he said that to me as there was no clue in my mind what he was talking about.

 

“She said to give you something when she got out of the surgery. He handed me a little box and stood there waiting as it was opened by me. Inside the box was a diamond ring. I gasped and hugged Marius then thanked him with a kiss to the cheek. “How long until she wakes up?” “About two hours. She will be out of it for a day or so. When she heals she should be able to fly again. With enough time she'll be able to stay in the air for prolonged flights and have no trouble.

 

I also took the liberty of having her blood samples looked at for certain tell tale sign of problems. She is perfectly and will have a long life ahead of her. You two should look me up in a century or two and we can compare notes. She has the legacy gene just as you do. You will both live for who knows how long. Try not to get bored though. That is a lesson that took me a few centuries to learn.”

 

Marius looked Maria over and then did a detailed physical exam of me. He listened as my horror story was told to him and smiled at the happy ending of it so far. “While Molly is resting there are some folks who want to meet you. It took some digging and calling in a few minor favors but I finally found Maria's family.”

 

This was a shock to me to say the least as it made me suddenly very afraid of losing Maria. Marius led me to a conference room where they waited nervously for me. Introductions were made and they all smiled at me and welcomed me to their family. Mark was Marissa's brother, Marisa had a twin sister who was an avian as well with most attractive figure and lovely light golden wings. She grabbed me and hugged me then introduced herself. “I am Marni. Motherhood suits you. Maria looks content in your arms. My sister chose wisely when she chose you to raise her daughter. Sitting over here and waiting impatiently is our mother, Rosa.”

 

We all sat and talked for several minutes before Maria started fussing. Without hesitation or thinking a second about it I gave her a bottle and then changed her real quick. Rosa smiled brightly at this. “You have bonded perfectly with her. Tell me about yourself dear. We are all curious.” It made me smile to be accepted so warmly.

 

My story was told in full detail and nothing was embellished or held back except for the attack in the hospital where a crazed lunatic with a phone stopped some idiot with a gun. They smiled and thanked me for stopping the man with the gun. “You should see the full security footage of it. When the lunatic threatened the baby she got mad and hit him with the phone. It's no wonder she is a perfect parent. She has the instincts of a she bear when protecting Maria.”

 

Marius told them all about the attack and they laughed a little bit at how I had downplayed it by saying it was very little that I had done and that anyone else could have done the same thing. “You are nervous my dear, but we are not here to take Maria from you. You are her mother and no baby should be separated from such a good mother.” That was a huge relief to me. Maria is my little girl now and there is no way she is going to be taken from me without a fight.

 

All of us went to a local little restaurant for a couple of hours and talked about my past. Rosa hugged me and smiled. “Maria saved your life and Marisa gave her life to save yours it would seem. I noticed a ring on your finger. So who is the lucky man?” I blushed and then after t hey finished laughing about it I answered the question. “I'm engaged to the most attractive angel in the whole world.”

 

Marni laughed at the look on her mother's face. “Melisa is a lesbian mom and obviously very much in love. Can we meet her?” “She just came out of surgery about two hours ago. She had to have nonconstructive surgery on her wings to fix them both so she could finally fly again. A car accident years ago left her wings mangled beyond use. It took another hour to explain to them about Molly and and how we met. After this it was time to change my diaper or risk a flood.

 

I was just about done changing when Marni came in with a diaper in her hand as well. She looked at me and laughed lightly. “When they say eight to twelve pounds on the package they are not kidding! That is all mine will hold before leaking!” That made me laugh and she laughed and went about the business of changing herself,

 

Molly met the family two weeks later when they cam in with legal papers to help make my adoption of Maria 100% legal. I accepted when Molly proposed officially and we planned our wedding for in the summer at the church where Maria and I had stayed for some time. We felt it was a perfect setting. When we finally announced the news of our impending marriage to the world it was a shock to us both when the dean of the college laughed about it.

 

He said it was about time Molly settled down and made an honest woman out of me. We invited him to our wedding ceremony and he gladly accepted. I finally got my art degree and my certification in diesel engine mechanics as well. The only snag in our wedding was when my diaper had to be changed before the ceremony. Normally it is not a problem, but try doing that in a wedding dress.

 

That was 13 long and lovely years ago now. Maria grew up knowing as much about her mother as we could tell her along with her mother's family. Molly and I both made it 100% clear that we wanted Marisa's family to be involved actively with us and Maria. They loved the idea and we all got along wonderfully. Molly and I even took Marni to bed a few times and made her wings shiver in pleasure. She gladly did the same with us up until a year ago when she met Julia and fell for her. They are getting married next summer as well at the same little desert church I now own.

 

The church has been restored and is now my painting studio. Maria loves the wide open area there as well as she has plenty of room to fly. Molly flies all the time now and Maria loves going with her on shorter flights. All three of us are in diapers full time still. Maria inherited incontinence and could never be potty trained. She never complains about it though so that is good.

 

I have to go now as Maria and Molly want me to come and join them for some time in the air. The weather outside is perfect for flying so I think I'm done with this narrative of how my life went from insane to perfect.

END

Well, that's it for this story.  The character Marius is an extremely old avian who was born when Juias Ceasar was still in power in ancient Rome.

[flowerdaddy22]

Wow, what an amazing story! You even managed to turn it into a happy ending, what with all the grueling action going on! Love it!