Diaper Training

[elfowl]

Monet smiles, and nearly gasps when Tom takes Lilly's hand and winks at her.  But she manages to suppress her reaction.

I panic.

It finaly clicks in my mind what Tom wants, that he's interested in me, and exactly what that means.  in reality he is a minor and I am not.  Any relationship between us could be viewed as an attempt at something unimaginably reprehensible and illegal.  But if I were to reject him because of that, it would involve telling him that i lied about my age.

In my panic I freeze up, not giving Tom my hand, but not preventing him from taking it, with a limp grip.  My other hand reaches back behind me, and grabs Daddy's thigh, squeezing hard.  I have absolutely no idea how to handle this situation.

"I... um... I... that... would be... fun..."  I stammer out, my eyes wide.

[Ishigreensa]

Sean leaned down, and he took Tom's hand away from Lilly's.

"I'm sorry, but she's not ready to hold hands yet," he told Tom.  "She can be your friend, but she's still just a fifth grader, and it's way too early for her to be thinking about boys in the way you are so mature for.  So, if you are interested, why don't you wait a few years until she catches up to you?"

Tom smiled and nodded.

"That's the way.  Fifth graders and even sixth graders shouldn't be thinking about one boy or one girl all the time anyway.  You have plenty of time for that.  What you really should be doing, is making as many friends as you can, and just learning from that, what you really llike.  Looks is not the whole relationship after all, you know?"

Tom nodded again though half of what sean said went over his head.  He just thought Lilly was cute, and yes, he was interested in her, but he didn't even understand completely what that meant.

[elfowl]

I'm a bit relieved when Daddy enters in and takes Tom's hand away from mine, and I scoot back closer to him.  He even gives an explanation that's completely innocent, and isn't just the stereotypical overprotective father

"I'd like to Just be friends Tom."  I say.  "And I'd love to go to an amusement park with you, but only if Monet can come too."

something strikes me about Daddy telling Tom to "Wait until I catch up to him"  I hadn't considered growing up, and getting older, but surely I would have to if i had friends who were 'my age'  I make a mental note to ask Daddy about it later.

Monet is extremely disappointed that Sean interfered, and forbid Tom and Lilly from being in a relationship, but she hides it as best as she can, knowing better than to say anything about it.

I turn to Daddy.  "Can we go home Daddy? I'm kinda tired."

[Ishigreensa]

Sean nodded and got up from the seat.

"I think it's time for Lilly to go get a nap," he told Susan and the other kids.

Tom's mouth dropped.  He never knew a fifth grader to need a nap in the late afternoon.  However, he had the good sense not to say anything or question what was said.  He just looked on, as Sean then proceeded to pick up Lilly as though she were a little child, and he started to carry her.  Tom thought that it looked more like he treated her like a first or maybe second grader than a fifth grader.

"We'll see you kids later," he told them.

Then he carried his baby Lilly to the car to take her home.

"You had a long day today," he whispered to her.  "But you were a very good girl."

[elfowl]

Monet, is just as surprised and confused as Tom, as Sean picks her up, and carries her off for a nap.  She wants to ask, but doesn't want to embarrass her new friend Lilly.

I blush a little as Daddy announces that I need a nap, but happily let him pick me up and carry me to the car.  I wave goodbye to everyone else over his shoulder, then cling onto him, as he carries me to the car, letting him put me in, and buckle my seat belt.

I hear him praise me, and I just about melt, my mouth opening in a wide grin, as I stare up into his eyes happily.  "Thank you Daddy.  It was fun."

As we ride I stare out the window, resting my head on the seat belt, and I feel my eyes slowly droop closed.  I don't bother to fight them.

[Ishigreensa]

Sean decided when he checks her into school the next day, he'll ask them about putting her down for a nap in the late afternoons for him, so that she gets used to that being a part of her regular routine.  He had tired her out on this day, but he wasn't sure she would always need a nap, so he intended to so see if he could get her used to taking an hour nap at around two or three in the afternoon.

He drove until he got home, and then after parking the car, he opened her door to check to see if she was still asleep.  If she was, he would try to pick her up without waking her....

[elfowl]

I'm just barely awake when Daddy opens my door.  I decide to play possum, and let him think I'm asleep.  I feel him unbuckle me, and gently, slowly lift me out, hoisting me up onto his shoulder.  I fall asleep sometime between him getting me out of the car, and putting me in my bed.

[Ishigreensa]

Sean carried her quietly and carefully to the door, resting her in his one arm and against his shoulder so he could juggle the keys with one hand and get the door unlocked.  It would take practice to get this down, but at least he managed to get the door open.  He then quietly carried her to her room, checked that the bed was not rigged, still rigged from before, and then he laid her down and covered her up.

Once she was in bed, he went down to watch some television until time to make dinner or until she woke up, which ever came first....

[elfowl]

I sleep for a while, waking up and not knowing how long I'd been asleep.  The room is dark, but I can see the curtains, and the sun shining though just a little bit.  I sit up and rub my eyes.  I start to get out of bed, but then remember Daddy's rule about getting up by myself.

I sigh but call for him anyways.  "Daddyyyyyyyy!"

[Ishigreensa]

Sean was just about to get off of the sofa to go start dinner when he heard little Lilly calling for him.

He came running up to her room, and then looked in at her from the doorway.

"What is it?" he asked her.  "You want to get up now?" he asked her.

He walked quietly over to her bed and sat down on it.

"How did you sleep, honey?"

[elfowl]

I can't help but giggle as I hear Daddy running towards my room.  "Sorry if I scared you Daddy.  I just woke up, and you told me not to get up without you."

I crawl over and up onto his lap as he sits down on the bed, and hug him, snuggling close to his chest.  "I'm ready to get up, may I please Daddy?"

I grin as he asks how I slept.  "I slept very good, thanks for carrying me to bed Daddy."

[Ishigreensa]

Sean smiled and nodded.

"It's okay.  I'm just glad you are safe and happy."

He held her patting her back.

"I was just about to make dinner.  Do you want to come and help?"

[elfowl]

I grin and nod.  "Okay Daddy I'll come help!"

I slip down off of his lap and land on the floor.  I feel a little bit dizzy, and reach out and grab Daddy's knee.  "oooh"  It passes quickly, and I'm back to standing stably.

[Ishigreensa]

Sean watched her carefully until she let go of his knee and showed that she was not dizzy any longer, then he reached out to take her hand and lead her to the kitchen.

"Do you know how to hold a potato peeler?" he asked her.  "We're going to have some mashed potatoes, barbequed burgers, maccaroni, and corn."

Sean walked her over towards the bathroom first.

"You should wash your hands before handling food, so since we are here, why don't you also go potty if you can?"

He waited to see if she would.

[elfowl]

I nod when Daddy asks if I know how to use a potato peeler, then slowly get excited as he tells me what we're having for dinner.  "I love mashed potatoes and burgers and macaroni!"  I croon gleefully.

When he takes me to the bathroom, I pull down my pants and training panties to try to go potty,  I sit down and let go,  surprisingly I actually have to go more than a little bit, and release a stream splashing into the potty for a little bit.

I stand up and pull my training panties, and pants, then wash my hands and dry them, showing off my clean hands to Daddy.  "All clean!"

[Ishigreensa]

Sean smiled and nodded at her.

He washed his hands, and then he took her towards the kitchen.

"Now, since there are two of us, we'll peel five potatoes, okay?"

He pulled out five large potatoes.

While you start on that, I'll start mixing together the hamburgers.

He was adding corn and seasoning to the burgers and mixing it in before flattening them out to grill in the broiler under the stove.  Then he put some barbeque mix on the top and let them start cooking.  Next, he started the maccaroni.

"When you get the potatoes peeled, put them in some water with enough water to cover over them at least eight inches, and then put them on the stove for me to turn on, okay?"

[elfowl]

I grin up at Daddy, happy to help him cook.  "Okay."  I nod as he tells me what to do.

I run some water, and scrub the potatoes, making sure they're super clean before picking up the potato peeler.  I begin to carefully peel the spuds, being very careful.  The last thing I need to do is cut myself while helping Daddy make dinner, he may never let me near anything sharp again if that happens.

When the potatoes are peeled, I ask where I can find a pot, and then pull it out, putting the potatoes in, and covering them with just enough water that they're submerged before putting the pot on the stove.  "Done!"  I declare happily.

[Ishigreensa]

Sean smiled and nodded.

"Very good, sweetie," he turned on the stove and continued making dinner.

"Maybe you can set the table with plates, forks, and cups?" he asked her.

He stopped mixing up the mac and cheese so he could check the burgers, turn them, add more sauce, and let them cook the rest of the way.

 

[elfowl]

I grin and nod.  "Okay Daddy!"  I turn to grab the plates forks and cups, hesitate for a few seconds, then turn back to Daddy.  "Where are the plates, forks, and cups?"

Once he tells me, I grab two of each, and put them in front of each seat at the table.

[Ishigreensa]

Sean smiled over at her as she set the table, and was soon putting milk, butter, and salt and pepper into the bowl with the boiled potatoes mashing them up and preparing them to add to the rest of the nearly prepared meal.

The corn didn't take much more than heating up, and the burgers were nearly done.

The maccaroni was already sitting in a large bowl in the middle of the table by this time.

Eventually, the table set, the food on the table, and Sean getting glasses and milk for both of them, he finally sat at the table and waited for Lilly to sit.

"Do you mind if I raise you to be somewhat religious?" he asked her.  "I don't mind if you don't want to attend church, but I would like to pray for meals, if that's okay."

While many parents wouldn't give their children a choice to attend church or not, or pray, he thought that forcing it would only push children away from God.  God had to be accepted in people's own hearts, and therefore, the idea had to be introduced in children, but they shouldn't be pushed to doing stuff that they didn't feel connected to.

He would try to not be too strict with it, but just ask her to be patient with him, and if she eventually wanted to pray with him or attend church with him, then he would happily invite her to do so.  

He lowered his head and started to pray.

His prayer sounded a little bit archaic as he used a lot more thees thous and thines in his prayer than a lot of moddern people did.

[elfowl]

I climb up into my chair and do my best to scoot it in.

I'm completely surprised when Daddy asks if I mind being raised somewhat religious.  I knew he was a believer and probably a somewhat devout one since the story he read to me on the first night was the bible.  

I grin "well it would be sort of wrong for me to tell you not to pray at meals, but no, I don't mind being raised in a religious household.  I was the first time around anyways."

I fold my hands and lower my head while Daddy prays, listening to his words and smiling.  There's something comforting about hearing an older form of English used in prayer.

When he finishes I dig into the meal, happily munching into the burger, and nearly melting with delight.  Everything is delicious, and I wish I was bigger so I could eat more.

When I've eaten enough to take the edge off of my hunger, I bring up the topic of religion again.  "I was raised Presbyterian, and was pretty devout when I was younger, but later in life I met a lot of people who were suffering, born in the wrong body, born to unfit, or unwilling parents,  people suffering because of things so far out of their control that it was unthinkable for there to be all knowing, all powerful, all loving god."

I keep eating a little here and there between talking.  "I still believe that there is a god, perhaps multiple, but I don't believe that they are the Judaeo-Christian God.  In fact I believe that the more that one claims to know about God, the more wrong they are."

"All that said, I believe in the church, most of them at least.  A bunch of people getting together to form community and to do good in the world.  That said, I'd prefer not to attend if that's alright with you.  I don't feel any need to go sit in a room for an hour and a half to listen to someone tell me things that I have already heard, already know, or completely disagree with.  If you want me to pray I'd be happy to, and I don't want to get in the way of your religion at all.  If that means bringing me to church because you don't want to leave me home alone, then so be it.  I just hope I can behave well enough in the nursery... if that's an option."

I smile at Daddy.  "The food is delicious.  Thank you Daddy!"

[Ishigreensa]

"The world is full of hate and difficulties, isn't it?" Sean smiled at his little girl.  "I know it can seem quite difficult to believe in God when everyone thinks that he controls everything we do, and he has perfectly mapped out our lives for us.  I cannot claim that I know everything there is about God, but I do know one thing, in my heart....  God is not controlling what happens in the world, at least not at this moment."

He sighed.

"However, just because he doesn't control things doesn't mean he doesn't hear prayers.  He has been answering prayers since before time began, and he still does answer them.  We don't always like the answers we get, and that sometimes turns people away from him, but he does answer.  He doesn't always answer as quickly as we want because there is something that we must do first that we don't know right away."

He smiled at her.

"Well, I think that's all I am going to say about it right now.  I don't want to bore you with details.  It is best you find your own way to think about God, and then when you have questions, you can ask me, and I'll answer as truthfully and as fully as I know.  I am but a man though, so honestly, while I am fit to behave like an adult, when it comes to spiritual matters, I am only as mature as a babe."

He nodded at her.

"I'll try to figure something out for you when I go back to church.  I don't want you to feel uncomfortable.  God's house is supposed to be one of love, not one of forced conformity."

He ate a bit more and then smiled when she praised his food.

"I'm glad you like it, honey.  No matter how young you are supposed to be, I want you to eat until you are full.  I don't believe in feeding a four year old only as much as a certain amount.  As long as I monitor what you eat, there is no danger of a child getting so fat that they need worry."

[elfowl]

I nod, a little bit worried I might offend Daddy, but he seems fully open minded, so I continue.  "I think it all returns to the four questions of Epicurus;  If God is willing but not able to prevent evil then he is not omnipotent.  If he is able but not willing to prevent evil then he is malicious.  If he is willing and able, then where does evil come from?  and if he is neither willing nor able, then why call him God?"

"What disturbs me even more is how a god who is all powerful, all knowing, and all loving, can allow for his followers to praise and worship him as such, and then turn around and claim that he hates gays, or asexuals, or tanspeople, or black people, or Jews, or Muslims, or anyone in his own name, giving them no indication that, that isn't the case, or if he does, that it is."

I grin as he reassures me that he won't let me get fat, and I stop holding back, cleaning off my plate soon after.  Everything is just so good.

[Ishigreensa]

"I don't have all the answers," Sean smiled and nodded at her.  "But I am sure of one thing.  There are people who will tell you that God hates certain people.  I don't believe that God hates anyone.  What I do believe, is God is made quite sad by all the things that people do, and by the misleading things they call in traps for because we don't know any better."

He sighed.

"You know, trying to convince you that God is not what you've heard, and you trying to convince me that God is not God, well, I think we have a better way to use our time.  Don't you?"

He wiggled his fingers at her as if to tickle her.

"I would like you to think of this, though....  While you are thinking about such things as all powerful, all knowing, and all loving....  When you were actually five years old, didn't mom and daddy look all powerful, all knowing, and all loving to you?"

He smiled.

"When we call God all knowing, all powerful, and all seeing, I think something we have to remember is that God is much older than the oldest living being, so in a way, are we not all on Earth, in a daycare as it were, a place where while we can lose our bodies, our spirits, if you believe we have them, cannot be destroyed?  We put kids in daycare so that they don't get hurt because there are 'all powerful' adults watching over them, right?"

He shook his head.

"Oops...  I did it again."  He wanted to put the religious debate away for a better time and yet, there he was, preaching at her.  He didn't want to do that.  He wouldn't want her to be uncomfortable because of his beliefs.  He wouldn't even want a child who was really eleven to be uncomfortable that way.  So, he had to get his mind off of God for the moment.

He wiggled his fingers at her.

"How about some daddy tickles?"

He moved towards her, but he didn't touch her because he didn't want her to choke from laughing too much.

[elfowl]

I nod, "I definitely understand that,  and when I was little I did believe."  It's my turn to sigh.  "It's just that now I've experienced things, and learned things that make it so that i can't just see things that way anymore.  ...Maybe that means I should forget those things, and not worry about them..."

I sigh a bit harder "I don't know... I don wanna think about it anymore..."

When Daddy starts wiggling his fingers at me as if he's going to tickle me, a grin spreads across my face, and I slide down off  my chair, already beginning to giggle even though he's not touching me yet.

"Nooooooooooo"  I say with a grin, backing away and putting my chair between myself and him.  

As he moves towards me I keep moving back, until his long steps nearly catch up with my little ones, and I squeal, unable to stop myself from giggling, and run off into the living room.  "Noooooo Daddy!  No tickles!  No tickles!"