Single Father with girls from two different moms

[Ishigreensa]

Robert frowned and shook his head.

"Lexi, actually, I don't like you hiding that it hurts.  It makes it hard to tell how badly I'm pulling your hair when you are completely quiet about it.  I would prefer it if you said that something was uncomfortable and especially when it actually did pull to the point that it hurt.  You have nothing to be sorry for.  It's natural for it to hurt when your hair if pulled, that's why I wanted to try to soften it, baby."

He continued more cautiously now, because he was certain that no matter what he said, she would not tell him how badly it hurt, so it was up to him to be more careful than when he had to do Imelda.  Imelda would tell him immediately if it so much as pulled a little, so he knew if it hurt her.

imelda sat in silence wondering if her big sister was going to be okay after all, or if she shouldn't try to be the big sister.  It looked like her big sister was kind of messed up.  It was like she didn't know when she was being bad, and when it was not being bad because of something natural that she needed or wanted.  Maybe she would have to teach her sister what the difference was between being good and bad, and just not being able to help something that happened to her.

She looked down.  

That seemed like a lot as she thought about it, and she wondered if she was up to the task of teaching her big sister how to be a big girl without being unreasonable with herself.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi sighed and frowned. She felt like she couldn’t do anything right. “I’m sorry Daddy.” She said sadly. “I’m just trying to be good. I wanna be good.” She was trying really hard to not let her voice crack. She felt like she was about to cry at any moment. 

She saw Imelda looking down. She felt like a terrible person. She was ruining everything and couldn’t do anything right. How was she supposed to be the big sister everyone expected her to be? She was hurting so much and had such a hard past and hard experiences that she didn’t feel like she ever could. She’d always be a failure. She’d never be able to live up to Robert’s and Imelda’s standards and wishes. 

When her hair was finally done, Lexi stood up and sighed. “Thank you Daddy.” She said meekly before curling up in the corner of one of the beds. 

[Ishigreensa]

Imelda sadly looked from her daddy to Lexi.  She reached for the brush, which Robert let her have, and then she walked over to the same bed that Lexi was on, and she crawled up next to her as she started to brush her own hair.  

"Lexi, are you okay?" she asked.  "I'm really worried about you.  Me and daddy know you are trying to be good.  You are trying too hard, though."

She leaned against the wall.

"If you want, you can ask me first how I do things if you don't know what to do in front of daddy.  Maybe that will help you know what he expects, and not make you so scared to try to get what you need or want?"

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi sighed. She was trying so hard not to completely fall apart, but Imelda’s questions kept making it harder and harder. She took a deep breath and did her best to keep her voice as even as possible. “I’m fine.” She said, trying to sound confident in her answer. 

“I’m not scared!” She said, her voice cracking more than before. She was trying so hard to be what everyone wanted her to be and how she was raised to be by her mother. She was having so much trouble though. It was just impossible. 

[Ishigreensa]

Imelda heard her voice crack and she couldn't take it anymore.

"Lexi, cry," she whispered.  "It's okay to cry.  Daddy will hear you, and he'll come right over and pick you up and hug you and comfort you.  It's bad to hold out on not crying when you feel like you need to because then you get mad and start saying mean things and hit other people for no reason.  You don't want to do that.  I know you don't."

She crawled into Lexi's lap.

"Cry, okay?  I promise, it won't hurt any worse than it does right now, and then daddy will make it feel better.  I used to do what you are doing.  I don't know if it was as hard for me to cry as it looks like it is for you, but I promise, it's okay to cry."

[Shy-Diapers]

“I don’t need to cry!” Lexi insisted, feeling the tears sting her eyes. She just couldn’t take it! She looked away so Imelda couldn’t see her eyes. She just wanted to be away from all the questions for once. Ever since CPS visited the house, Lexi had been getting questioned and grilled nonstop. She just wanted a break. Why did everyone have to question everything?!

She shifted Imelda out of her lap and hid in the bathroom, curling up in the far corner of the small bathroom. She sat against the wall and hugged her knees close to her chest, trying to make herself as small as possible. She was shaking like you do when you sob, but she was silent. She had tears running down her small pale face, but she wasn’t making any sound. She felt like she was falling apart. 

[Ishigreensa]

Imelda shook her head and settled down under the blankets.

After some time, Robert saw that Lexi had been in the bathroom for a while, so he went in to check on her.

He first knocked at the door.

"Lexi, baby, can I come in?" he asked wanting to make sure she wasn't doing something embarrassing before walking in on her.  "I am just a little worried because you were in here for a while, sweetie.  I want to make sure you are okay."

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi jumped a little when she heard Robert knock. She bit her lip and sniffled. “Um.” She croaked, her voice shaky and strained. She tried to wipe her eyes and make it look like she hadn’t been crying. 

“I-I’m okay.” She called, her voice obviously strained from crying for so long. She didn’t know what to do, but she was nervous about Robert coming in and knowing she’d been crying for so long and about things she assumed he would thing were stupid. 

[Ishigreensa]

Robert heard her voice sounded strange, so he came in anyway.  he was now worried that she might have peed herself and gotten embarrassed, and that's why it had taken so long, but when he saw her curled up on the floor and her eyes red but her pants dry, he knew there must have been soemthing else wrong.

"Honey, come here," he called  to her motioning for her to come to him so he could pick her up.  "Why were you in the bathroom all alone, baby?  I mean, if you were peeing, that's one thing, but crying in here by yourself isn't helping anything, baby."

 

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi went a little more pale than she already was, shuffling nervously up to Robert. She didn’t know what to expect. She hoped she wasn’t in trouble. She was prepared to be though. She was always prepared to be in trouble for something. 

“I-I wasn’t crying.” She squeaked quietly. She was trying so hard to be perfect and who she was expected to be. 

“I don’t like so many questions.” She said sadly, staring at her bare feet on the cold bathroom tile floor. She sighed and rubbed her head. She was tired from crying so much and having such an eventful day. Because of how tired and worn she was, she was more likely to be a little more open. 

“I wanna be good. I’m trying really hard. I don’t think I can be as good as you want me to.” She said looking down again. She felt vulnerable. “I’m trying to be good and perfect. But I don’t fit in.” She admitted sadly. “I’m making trouble and I don’t think I can be what I’m supposed to.”

”I don’t like questions anymore. No more questions please!” Lexi pleaded. “Everyone only asks me questions now that I got taken from mommy. Everyone wants to know stuff and I don’t want more questions! They’re hard and they hurt me and there’s too many!” She said, starting to break down and cry again. 

[Ishigreensa]

Robert picked her up and hugged her.

"Well, how about we put the questions away for now, baby?  If Imelda asks you something you don't like, come and tell daddy, and I'll remind her that you are taking a break from questions for awhile.  I'm sure she didn't mean to upset you, and I certainly didn't mean to, honey."

He patted her back as he carried her back to the room and tucked her into bed.

"Imelda, please don't ask her any questions right now, okay?  At least, don't ask her about anything that has happened before.  She's tired of talking about it."

Imelda nodded and cuddled up in bed.

"I'm sorry," Imelda said.

Robert sat on the edge of their bed and continued to pat Lexi on the side as he hoped the calm would put her at peace.  He wasn't sure if it was too early for her to go to sleep, but he didn't like to see her all upset.  

Imelda yawned.  It had been a very long day.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi nodded. Not being questioned sounded nice. It was overwhelming for the girl after not having many people talk with her, to suddenly being asked so many questions by so many people. 

She sighed and leaned into Robert, holding her stuffed owl to try and calm herself down. Everything was so new and different. It was so hard. She rested her head on his chest and let him pat her. 

“Everything is different. I just wanna be good.” She said softly. She was getting really tired. She hadn’t slept well at the foster home and certainly never got much sleep at her mother’s.

“Daddy can I sleep in the bed with you?” She asked, unsure what his response would be. She assumed that because there were two beds that she’d have to share with someone. She didn’t feel comfortable enough sharing with Imelda, and if she was honest, she didn’t feel all that safe sleeping alone.

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.” Lexi mumbled quietly, worried that Robert would be mad at her request. 

[Ishigreensa]

Robert put his finger on her mouth when she started to say 'I shouldn't have....' not getting used to her manner of thinking everything she did was bad.  "I'll sleep right here between both of you girls, that way, no one feels left out.  If Imelda doesn't want that, then she can go to the other bed, okay?"

He looked from Lexi to Imelda but Imelda was already nearly asleep and didn't care.

He pulled his little Lexi over towards him, and put her under the blankets and then he closed his eyes.

"Go to sleep, baby.  Tomorrow is going to be a big day, and I can't promise the judge won't ask any questions, but I'll try to answer as many of them as I can for you.  He has to understand that you are tired of them, and I'm sure he has some of the reports made by others who have already asked you, baby."

He patted her arm as he waited for her to relax enough to fall asleep.

He whispered in her ear.

"I know you're eleven, honey.  But as upset as you are, just in case... I want you to know... It's okay to wet your pants in your sleep.  Don't be scared if it happens, but if you are too old to do that, then I'm sorry.  I just don't want you to feel scared or upset if it happens, okay?"

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi frowned when Robert said he’d sleep between both of them. She didn’t have much room with all three of them in one bed. She felt like she was going to fall off and she felt squished. She sighed and moved to the second bed. 

When Robert mentioned wetting her pants, she let out a small squeak and her cheeks burned. She was scared to tell Robert that she had been wetting the bed on and off for a while, but it had become more consistent in the week or two leading up to being removed from her home. And she’d wet the bed every night at the foster home. 

She was scared of what Robert might do if he found out she wet the bed on a regular basis. Would he be mad? He said he wouldn’t be. Would Imelda find out? She was more scared of Imelda finding out than Robert. 

She curled up alone in the other bed. She was so tired, but was too scared, worried, and worked up to go to sleep. 

[Ishigreensa]

Robert noticed that she moved to the other bed and Imelda was already asleep, so he made sure that Imelda was covered up and that she was indeed sleeping and then he got up and went over to the other bed.

He crawled in next to her and whispered.

"What are you scared about, sleeping with Imelda?" he asked her.  "Imelda is younger than you, but by only a couple of months.  And she's not going to bite you, baby."

He wrapped his arms around her.

"You said you wanted to sleep with daddy, honey, and daddy did say yes.  If you want daddy to be right there, I can be.  Imelda is okay on her own.  She doesn't need to sleep with daddy most of the time anymore.  She's gotten used to me being around, and actually usually insists that she's a big girl and wants to sleep by herself."

He  pulled Lexi closer.

"Go to sleep, honey.  It's okay."

[Shy-Diapers]

“I don’t know her.” Lexi mumbled sleepily. “And I felt squished.” She said quietly. She rubbed her eyes. She was so tired but was afraid to sleep. 

“There wasn’t room for me in the bed.” She said dejectedly. 

She bit her lip worriedly. She was scared to tell Robert that she wet the bed almost every night and that she probably would at the motel too. She sighed and fidgeted with her owl and quilt. She didn’t know what to do. 

Lexi fought to stay awake, figuring that if she didn’t sleep, then she wouldn’t wet the bed and Robert wouldn’t be mad and Imelda wouldn’t know she was a baby. Eventually she did fall asleep, though it was about three or so hours after Imelda did. She just couldn’t fight anymore and her body gave in to sleep. 

[Ishigreensa]

About thirty minutes after Imelda fell asleep, Robert finally fell asleep.

The next morning, Imelda woke up early, at around six, and turned on the television as low as she could but still be able to hear it, and she started to watch cartoons.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi slept through the night once she was asleep. She didn’t wake up, but she did have nightmares. Unfortunately she was used to them. They’d been happening since CPS got involved. She could never remember what they were about, but she knew they scared her. 

When Lexi woke up, she felt disoriented. She then remembered what had happened the previous day. She rubbed her eyes and then she felt it. She had soaked the bed. Her face went pale and she felt tears well up in her eyes. She didn’t know what to do. She saw Imelda was awake, so she did her best to stay silent. 

Lexi shook Robert, trying to wake him up. She hoped he wouldn’t be mad at her, but she was more concerned about Imelda finding out. 

It was around 7:45 now. 

[Ishigreensa]

Imelda looked over towards Robert wondering when he was going to get up.  She knew they had to get going soon because he said that they would have to go to court pretty early that next morning.

Robert wasn't too hard to shake awake, and he looked over at Lexi.

"Are you okay?" he asked her.  

He reached over to grab her and pull her over closer to him, putting her on top of him as he lay on his back.

My Lexi is finally...," and he paused.  Her bottom and mid back felt wet.  He smiled up at her after a moment or two and he whispered.

"We should get your dressed for the day, sweetie."

He looked over at Imelda.

"Imelda, can you take my keys from by the television and check to see if my wallet was left in the car?" he asked her.

Imelda smiled and jumped out of bed and ran over to get the keys.  She loved getting into the car for daddy when he forgot things, but it was really just an excuse to get her out of the room for a minute.

"Okay, honey," he sat up and turned to put Lexi down next to the bed on her feet.  "Take that clean dress and some clean panties and go in the bathroom to change, okay?"

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi was crying by the time Robert woke up. She was so scared and nervous she didn’t know what to do. She had no idea what to expect as far as Robert’s reaction. 

She squeaked when she felt Robert’s hand on her wet bottom. She was dreading what would happen next. She was prepared for screaming, wincing in fear. 

To her surprise though, Robert didn’t yell or even scowl. He seemed nice and kind about it. He even got Imelda out of the room. 

Lexi nodded and scurried off to the bathroom when requested to. She took off her underwear and the shirts she had slept in. She slipped her new underwear and undershirt on, unable to help but squirm a little. It was itchy and gross feeling after wetting the bed. Even in new underwear, Lexi still felt itchy. She was used to it though. She never got cleaned that well after wetting the bed at home, and she always hid it at the foster home. She put her blue dress on that she had picked out the day before. 

Once she was dressed, she peeked out of the bathroom and saw that Imelda was still gone. She shuffled over to Robert and held up her wet things. She didn’t know what to do with them. 

“Am I in trouble daddy?” She asked meekly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do it Daddy.”

[Ishigreensa]

Robert shook his head and reached out for her wet things.

"Sometimes, accidents happen to little girls," he told her.  "It's a fact of life.  I have no reason to think you did this on purpose, so there is no reason to yell at you or to punish you for it.  Your embarrassment was punishment enough, honey."

He went to the trash container and as there was no trash in it, he pulled out the plastic lining and then dropped her clothes in that and then tied it up and put it one of her bags.

"I'll have to stop at a laundromat sometime today to get these clothes cleaned up so they don't stain too much, baby."

He then looked up just as the door opened.

"Daddy!  I couldn't find your wallet in the car," Imelda said coming through it.

"Oh, silly daddy!  I see it by the television.  See?"

Imelda nodded and walked over and got it, and then walked over and gave it to him.

She walked over to Lexi and looked up at her.

"Do you want to play later?" she asked.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi kept her head hung when Robert spoke to her. She was so embarrassed. It was nice that Robert didn’t yell or punish her though. That helped. Maybe he was right, maybe there wasn’t anything wrong with what happened. 

She smiled a little and sat down on the other bed. She figured Robert would strip the bed before they left. She folded her blanket up and put it into her backpack along with her white owl. She hoped she’d be able to bring them with her when they had to see the judge. 

Lexi shrugged. “Okay.” She said quietly. She wasn’t against Imelda, so she had no reason to avoid playing with her. She just hoped Imelda wouldn’t ask her more questions about herself or her past. She didn’t want to talk about it more than she already had. 

“Daddy when do we have to leave to see the judge?” She asked nervously. It was easy for Robert to hear that she was at least a little nervous about the day. She’d never done anything like this and she was so scared. 

[Ishigreensa]

"Well, we have to be there at ten.  As far as I know, he just wants to meet with all of us and make sure you are okay with me taking you home.  The last thing they want to do, is take you from one bad condition and put you in a worse situation where you might be abused or hurt."

He smiled.

"But that won't happen, so it shouldn't take too long for him to decide to let you come home with us."

He was indeed stripping the bed and then he wrote a note of apoloby to the motel explaining that one of his children was just taken from a very bad situation and that she likely suffered from so much trauma that it caused her problems like this.

Once that was done, he started to pack up the car.

Imelda stayed right with Lexi the whole time.

Lexi kind of smelled because she didn't take a shower after wetting the bed, but Imelda didn't say anything about it.  She just wondered why Lexi smelled so bad still having not quite put together the wet bed that her daddy stripped and the smell coming from Lexi.

[Shy-Diapers]

Lexi nodded. She was really nervous. Her tummy felt weird like it was doing somersaults. She swallowed hard as Robert got things ready. She was embarrassed that he had to strip the sheets, and she was very aware of her itchiness down there. 

Lexi sat in the backseat, holding her bag tightly in her lap, trying to run different scenarios through her head. She didn’t like not knowing how things would go. She liked consistency and predictability. 

“Daddy? Is he gonna ask me questions? I don’t want more questions.” Her voice was uneven, like she might cry. She was scared. 

Poor Alexandra didn’t know how to feel. She was so scared and so worried. 

[Ishigreensa]

Robert sighted.

"I don't know if he's going to ask you questions or not, but I'm going to see how many of those questions I can answer for you so that they don't bother you too much, baby.  I know you've been through a lot, and hopefully, the judge will realize that, too."

He looked to the back seat at her as he started to drive them to have some breakfast.

Imelda leaned against Lexi.

"I'll answer your questions for you," she said fully intending to help.  For her, it wasn't so hard to let daddy take her since her mom had died when he came to take her, so she didn't understand the questions that would have to be asked.  She thought they would just ask questions about how he was at being a daddy and Imelda thought she knew more about that than Lexi did anyway.