A Humble Introduction.

[Necare]

Greetings fellow infantilists and nappy adorers! Finally I got the courage to actually register at an AB-site! Until now I`ve always been a bit of a peeping tom(Or should that be peeing? He, he), but as this is often a lone man`s fetish, sooner or later I had to pull myself together and try a bit of the old communication. Well,to tell a bit about myself. As you can see, I go under the name Necare, am an adult baby boy, 28 years of age, and yeah, I`m from the trollish climes of Norway( I`ve noticed that most of you stem from the USA, am I the only one from Norway? Currently I`m taking a bachelor in the history of ideas, I like watching horror and comedy, I find psychology and philosophy interesting, and I listen to everything from black metal to A-ha.

It seems that a great abundance of AB`s often struggle with this fetish, but most sooner or later gets some sense into their heads, and learn to accept it as part of themselves. Well, I am definitely one of the still struggling kind, and have a constant battle with myself over this. I think it is really admirable that people accept this fetish in themselves, but I can speak only of myself, and more often than not I feel as the most pathetic human being on earth. "What, am I actually lying here, wanting a pacifier, a mommy, and a nappy?Cut it out!...." The thing is; two, three years ago, I was in a relationship with this beautiful woman. I felt I could trust her, and many times she seemed really in love with me, but I know now that she probably was a manipulating sadist. At the beginning of the relationship I confessed to her the fact that I was an infantilist, and while it was not to her liking, she seemed to accept it well. I will not go into details, but lets say that she used the craft of manipulating my psyche with often subtle touches.

Photos were taken of me, in very private situations, posted on the net, and the depressing and anxiety-causing result: The one thing that I wished to keep the most private has hurled me into a daily struggle of having the knowledge that each and every being I face on the street knows, and meets me with either a look of contempt, or laughter. So, yeah paranoia, angst, and depression are my ever faithful companions.

Thats not to say that I`ve always found the darker aspects of things enticing, and I could easily be put into the somewhat introvert/cerebral-section of folk. So the fact that the baby side of me does`nt excactly fit in with the darker aspects is to me a constant source of self-contempt. Now, public. I`ve often thought that either I have to conform totally to being a baby 24/7, erasing all my other sides(Pretty difficult the other way around.), I have thought that either that, or life has to end. But when checking AB messageboards/ads, it feels even more depressing to read that mommies doesn`t actually come in a great abundance, compared to single guys seeking a mommy. I know this is primarily a introduction page, but I`ll ask anyway: Is there any of you who struggles daily with this kind of thing? The ambivalence of mind? Hope you didn`t find this too boring, but in order for you to know where I`m coming from, I felt this was essential. Babies, DLs, and last but not least, Mommies: Thanks for letting me spilling my guts! CHEERS!!

[prob4711]

Welcome Necare.

Let me start by saying that i'm sorry you suffered that awful experience with your ex partner. My husband has recently admitted he is an ab and although i wasn't exactly very understanding in the beginning ( I screamed, shouted, cried, threatend to leave him and tell his family why) I did eventually calm down and after finding out more about what he does and why he does it i have accepted it is part of who he is and have even taken on the role of mummy for him once or twice. The point i'm trying to make is that yes it sounds like you made a bad choice in telling your ex but don't give up hope of finding someone to accept you.

But remember, you have to accept yourself for who you are if you expect anyone else to.

There are some great members on this site and i'm sure you'll fit right in.

Have fun x

[Necare]

Thanks for your understanding prob4711, greatly appreciated!! Agree, should have never told my ex, but despite the fact that she turned out to be a phony person, she at least agreed to be my mommy now and then, so at least something good came out of it I can fully understand that it must have been strange for you the first time your husband revealed that he was an AB, but I`m glad to see that you have given it a chance, and as you said has acted as his mommy once or twice:) I hope I fit in here, but since I am still struggling with this babything, I find it hard to f.ex enter the chatroom and talk in a babymode. At least for now, I think I`ll use my adult language, and we will take it from there. Have you been to the chatrooms yet? Would have been nice talking to you in a live mode. The best of luck to you and your AB!!

[prob4711]

Yeah, i've been into the chatrooms. I found this site when looking for more info on ab's. Registered myself and spoke to some of the members on here. They've all been great answering my questions and it made me understand a little bit. It was after speaking to people on here that i decided to go ahead and "help" my husband with his little fetish.

You don't have to go into the chatroom speaking baby talk, join in with the chat, be yourself, get to know people and as you do you will probably find yourself doing it without even realizing.

NEVER be ashamed of who you are and above all else HAVE FUN!!!

[Necare]

Thanks! Will try By the way, are you beginning to enjoy the mommy-role in itself, or is it primarily something you do to keep your husband a happy baby? Just curious! Cheers!

[prob4711]

I suppose it is kind of fun, when it's on my terms but mainly i do it because it makes him happy. Couldn't handle it if it was an everyday thing.

[Necare]

That is perfectly understandable, since it is his fetish after all But I must say I`m really envious of your man, you seem like a understanding and caring lady. If he is sane if he will hold on to you for dear life, and I`m sure he knows how hard it is to find a mommy. Sigh. See you