freswith Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 California vintners in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic. It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night. The new wine will be marketed as PINO MORE Link to comment
freswith Posted July 16, 2009 Author Share Posted July 16, 2009 "When superheroes get old", by Daniel Soffritti http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/culturepicturegalleries/5709426/When-comic-book-heroes-and-villains-get-old-Superheroes-Decadence-by-Donald-Soffritti.html?image=10 Link to comment
dlsmd Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 California vintners in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic. It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night. The new wine will be marketed as PINO MORE Viagra as of 21/07/09 will be known by it's chemical name. Please ask your pharmacist for micoxaflopin. ROTOFLAO Link to comment
Guest Mummy's Cute Baby Lucy Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 Important New Swine Flu Information! If You receive an email saying that it is possible to catch swine flue from tinned pork, just ignore it! It's Just Spam! Giggles Lucy Link to comment
bbgirlmichelle Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 Important New Swine Flu Information! If You receive an email saying that it is possible to catch swine flue from tinned pork, just ignore it! It's Just Spam! Giggles Lucy Wow, that's bad, but I laughed *huggles* Michelle Link to comment
Yvhuce Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 We saw some swine flu once... Boy was that hog rancher pissed... And we never did get the stink out of that cannon... Link to comment
freswith Posted July 19, 2009 Author Share Posted July 19, 2009 I understand that if you suck a Viagra tablet slowly it will give you a stiff neck. Link to comment
babykeiff Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 It is surprising that we are trying to eliminate 'swine flu'. Would in not be advantageous to let it run rampant....... and get rid of the swine in government? Link to comment
babykeiff Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/30/winnie-the-pooh-on-swine_n_193624.html Link to comment
Guest Mummy's Cute Baby Lucy Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/30/winnie-the-pooh-on-swine_n_193624.html awww poor little Piglet! BTW Don't bother phoning the 'Swine Flu Helpline' ... You'll just get crackling! Link to comment
babykeiff Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 awww poor little Piglet! BTW Don't bother phoning the 'Swine Flu Helpline' ... You'll just get crackling! Abrera's one was good, but this one had me crying with laughter.... brilliant. Link to comment
freswith Posted August 30, 2009 Author Share Posted August 30, 2009 A lonely widow, age 70, decided that it was time to get married again. She put an ad in the local paper that read: HUSBAND WANTED: MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70s), MUST NOT BEAT ME, MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED !!!!! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON. On the second day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs. The old woman said, 'You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you...you have no legs! The old man smiled, 'Therefore, I cannot run around on you!' She snorted. 'You don't have any arms either!' Again, the old man smiled, 'Therefore, I can never beat you!' She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, 'Are you still good in bed???' The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, 'Rang the doorbell didn't I?' Link to comment
freswith Posted August 30, 2009 Author Share Posted August 30, 2009 A woman was helping her husband set up his computer and at the appropriate point in the process the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on. The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password,he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he typed: P...E...N...I...S His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied: **** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH*** Link to comment
BabyJune Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Bumper sticker on a pink Ferrari: "If you experience an erection lasting more than four hours...CALL ME!" Link to comment
babyfett Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 Man walks into a bedroom holding a sheep where his wife is sat. He says "This is the cow I sleep with when your not around!" Wife says "I think you will find that thats a sheep" The man replies "I know. i was talking to the sheep." Link to comment
freswith Posted September 16, 2009 Author Share Posted September 16, 2009 We all know those cute little computer symbols called "emoticons" where means a smile and means a frown. Well, here are some "ass-cons". (_!_) a regular ass (___!___) a fat ass (!) a tight ass (_._) a flat ass (_^_) a bubble ass (_*_) a sore ass {_!_} a swishy ass (_o_) an ass that's been around (_0_) an ass that's been more around (_x_) kiss my ass (_X_) leave my ass alone (_zzz_) a sleepy ass (_o^o_) a wise ass (_13_) an unlucky ass (_?_) dumbass Link to comment
Mischa Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 How did the two timing Mexican get into heaven? The swine flew! Now THAT's funny Link to comment
toon Posted October 23, 2009 Share Posted October 23, 2009 a woman goes to her gyno. She is up in the stirups and the gyno takes a look. "Holy God thats a HUGE Vag"! he exclaims her eyes large and face blushed she says "thats not nice!" The gyno says "no I've being doing this for a long time and thats the biggest thing I've ever seen, but not to worry I have some tips and tricks to help you reduce the size for your husband:! So she goes home and she's standing over a mirror doing her workout when her husband walks in. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" he asks her Oh Im just doing some workouts the doc gave me! he looks at her funny and says......"oh okay just dont fall in that hole"! Link to comment
freswith Posted December 4, 2009 Author Share Posted December 4, 2009 A group of children were trying very hard to become accustomed to Kindergarten. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! You need to use 'Big People' words,’ she was always reminding them. She asked John what he had done over the weekend. ‘I went to visit my Nana'. No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use ‘Big People' words!' She then asked Mitchell what he had done ‘I took a ride on a choo-choo'. She said. 'No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use 'Big People' words'. She then asked little Alex what he had done? ‘I read a book' he replied. That's WONDERFUL!' the teacher said. ‘What book did you read?' Alex thought real hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride, and said, 'Winnie the SHIT'. Link to comment
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