An Unbridled Boi In Autumn

[CandiPiglet]

This is my first story being posted on DD. This is my official warning that it does contain Bisexual themes, sex, harsh language, and so on. It also contains the use of marijuana. If that is not allowed or offends anybody, please let me know and I will take the necessary measures to remove the story or allow the moderators to handle it if they so choose. I love DD and am not here to break any rules or to hurt anybody!!! I love you guys! This story has a little bit of me in it, but is almost completely fiction. It jumps around in places, but that is due to the fact that I have not worked on it in a while and it is not complete. I'm just trying to get some ideas out there to see if anyone likes it. If I get a few bites, I'll polish it up and work on it a lot more. If it is confusing to anyone, please let me know and I will tie up the loose ends ASAP and repost. Thank You very much and ENJOY~! - Babyblue

An Unbridled Boi in Autumn

Chapter One

When I think of the time I spent in college, the memory that recurs the most is the one where I am sitting at the picnic table in the park near my apartment with my friend Jules. Her real name is Julie, but we never really called her that. Anyhow, we're at the picnic table rolling a joint and out of nowhere she tells me that she loves me...

I have always pictured myself as someone who does not love just one person. I am a boy who has always fancied the love of all sorts of people. The friendships that have been forged over the years have bloomed into relationships and relationships have matured into passionate infatuations; some have survived and others... perished.

Before college, there was a point in time when I was free. My grandfather passed away when I was 17 and he left three million dollars to me in his will. I invested 2.5 of it, and used the other half mil to enjoy my 18 through 22. I kept my inheritance to myself, aside from Jules. She knew the whole time, but never let slip the secret of my fortune. In return, since I spent almost every waking hour with her, she got to taste the glory of it.

When the time came for me to move out from under my parents' roof, I decided to move several hours south of where I grew up. I wanted to keep them at a distance, but still wanted to be reachable in case of an emergency. I decided on a small town called Blandon. It wasn't a very exciting neighborhood, but then again, if it was it probably would have been called Thrillington, or something of that nature. Too bad.

The place was a little on the humble side, but what it lacked in size, it gained in charm. ****

I bought a red 1971 Chevelle. It didn't look perfect, but under the hood it was immaculate. The paint was a little faded, but it had a black racing stripe in the center of the car and mean black pinstripes on the side. It roared cleanly down the road but its throaty rumble demanded a head-turn. It was quick, but I never raced it. I opened it up on the highway, but never abused it. Its previous owners probably had a little more "fun" with it than I did, but I had no reason to abuse my daily driver.****

I decided to buy a little bit of land up in to woods near the college I was planning to attend. There was some remote lakefront land that had a small access road and a gate. It wasn't well-maintained, but there was room enough for a trailer. We decided to spend the weekends of our first free summer on that little beautification project. We bought a 28 foot travel trailer specifically for smoking, drinking, and camping in. It was only twenty minutes from my apartment, and had limitless potential. Jules had a '72 Bronco with plenty of off-road capability that made it fairly easy to reach our spot.

The first leaf we saw fall off a tree that year was on september 27th. I remember the date because it was unbelievably early that year due to the oddly low temperatures we experienced. We were sitting in me car smoking a joint at the lake staring out at the sunset, when Jules asked me what I was going to do when she had to go away.

"Go away where?" I asked her, only slightly confused.

"You know, like to college and stuff. You know I've been planning on going to Rochester. I wanna get away from here Toby."

"I know... but" ...I took a hit... "...why can't you just stay here and go to school? You're away from your family already and Rochester is no closer."

*** "There's nothing about being here that I don't like. It's the fact that I've never been away from the east coast. If I go to Rochester I could major in Biology and then I could move to the west coast and be a Marine Biologist." ***

"That's true, but you're still young Jules. I don't want to hold you back, but when were you planning on leaving?"

"Well, what's keeping me here? I mean, I could leave whenever."

"Hmmm... I kinda like to think that maybe I was keeping you here. Wow, I'm fucking conceited. Ha ha."

"How are you keeping me here? All I do is hang out and spend your money. You have better things that you could be doing with it."

"Like what? I have 2.5 MILLION dollars invested in stocks and mutual funds, and I've taken the other half a mil and put it towards fun, and I'm still making some money by selling here and there! Besides, money doesn't really have a fucking thing to do with it. Or maybe it does! I mean, I was blessed with this copious sum of cash. I was also blessed with such a dear friend to share it with. I don't have to share it with anybody else but YOU and I think that's awesome. If you leave here, the good times for me are over... I mean, you are the best friend anyone could ever have, and you're MY best friend. How could I not take advantage of that?"

She didn't really say anything after that. She took a few hits of the joint and packed a bowl. She stared at the horizon as the sun sank slowly behind the trees. Clouds rolled in and completed the picturesque scene. We almost ended up in a moment of awkward silence if it hadn't been for us being high. We just blamed the lack of conversation on the weed, but we knew there was meaning behind it. Then Jules broke the silence.

"What if I stay? Then what? Are we gonna live together Toby? Are we gonna get married? I mean, we're best friends, not lovers. Friends part ways without detriment. Don't you understand that? The world is not gonna come crashing down when I leave to better myself and pave my future Toby. Maybe you should get over it."

"What?" was all I could manage after that heartbreaking little rant. As the sky became darkened by the cloud cover, we let the tension fade and lit a cigarette. "What do you think?" I asked her.

"About what?"

"What do you think would happen if you stayed here with me?" I clarified.

"I think... I think we would continue doing what we're doing right now. Having fun whenever we want, but always having that voice in the back of our heads saying 'And then what? Where is this getting you? Graduation is still six years away if you start RIGHT now!' and we'll always wonder 'why didn't we stop this sooner?' I am enjoying this right now, but it seems too good to be true, and all good things must come to an end, and I just don't want it to end badly."

"If it's going to end Jules, let it end on its own. Don't MAKE it end. Forget that voice in the back of your head. You'll have plenty of time to go to school. We're only nineteen. It has been only one year since I inherited and we have been doing so well! Just let it ride and enjoy yourself. Jules! We are SO fortunate to be able to live like private rockstars! You're right. We're not lovers, but you are the most important person in my life and I want to share everything with you."

"Do you really mean that? Because I don't have much to contribute. I feel like such a burden all the time. I feel so guilty asking more of you when you've given me so much already. I'm just scared of where we'll end up. I don't want to leave you, I just want to see what there is out there."

"Maybe I'll go with you."

"Maybe the sun will explode."

And that's where we left off that night. I started the car and we slowly drove back to Blandon to live out the rest of the night. She was so angry and I had no idea why. There was so much she wasn't telling me. We went back to my apartment and flipped on the T.V. We curled up on the couch and lit a blunt she rolled on the way home. There were a lot of things I liked about Jules, and one of my favorite things was her ability to roll a blunt. They were tight, they breathed, and they were always generously packed. She said she didn't contribute much, but really she had no idea how much she actually brought to the table.

"I'm sorry I was such a bitch earlier. I have just been so emotional lately because I just can't believe how good I have it right now and it seems like its going to end and I'm scared, so I'm trying to make sure I'm ready for when that happens. I was doing so well before all of this, and I mean that in a GOOD way, but I just don't want to fall on my ass. You are my world right now."

I looked in her eyes with a warm gaze of understanding and she knew I was on the same page. This was forgiveness without words. It usually was followed immediately by,

"Wow girl, you need to get laid or something." And then I would blow smoke in her face. We both laughed and snuggled a little bit. All I really remember was getting half way through the blunt, putting it out and spacing out a little bit, but definitely getting lost in the sheer enjoyment of life. Before I knew it, we were kissing and practically mauling each other. It didn't get much farther than that before we both kinda started laughing and backed off of each other and just snuggled again and slowly worked our way upstairs to the bedroom. We crashed on the bed and pulled the covers over ourselves, kissed each other goodnight and got comfortable. In a few moments, she rolled over to face me and observed me clutching my stuffed puppy and my blankies, sucking my thumb.

I always suck my thumb when I sleep; I always have and I never plan to stop. It is my favorite method of catharsis and I am fairly open about it. After all, it's part of who I am.

"You are so adorable." She whispered to me as she popped her thumb in her mouth and joined me in the calm, cathartic moment that I enjoy every night when I go to sleep.

"Good night Julie."

* * *

"Whoa whoa, slow down. Softer."

She was out of control. When it came to romance, it just didn't seem to come naturally to her, and I absolutely loved it. There was such a charming quality in the way she lacked a natural sense of grace in the bedroom, so to speak. We had never made love before that night and we weren't ready yet. I wanted to take it slow because she was my best friend and I didn't want to fuck that up. We both knew that was a shitty excuse because whether or not we had happened to have made love one night in the past, no matter how good or bad it was, whether there was true passion or pretentious role-playing, it was all going to end up as another crazy story in our repertoire.

I resisted a little bit and ultimately denied myself the pleasure of making love to the girl I'd been crazy about for years. I wanted it to be right. I didn't want it to happen on the couch in her apartment after shopping at Wal-Mart. I wanted it to be special and memorable; I wanted it to be real.

"I love you too." I finally answered her as I sat on the edge of the bed. A tear rolled down her cheek and she stared into me, attempting to make eye contact with me; I refused. I had never really denied anyone I was close to. There were even times when I had casual sex with a near stranger. The difference was, I never loved any other girl besides Jules. Fire ate away at my insides in all directions as the conflict consumed my soul. I had just made the most difficult decision in my life.

I knew it hurt her, but at the same time I knew that if I had gone through with it and it wasn't real and something changed between us then it would have hurt her even more. The chances of that weren't very good, but I wasn't will to take that risk.

"You don't have to be afraid Toby." was all she said as she stood up and walked to the bathroom. I sat and pondered my previous actions, fighting with myself and agonizing over my indecisiveness. I knew I was doing the right thing and I wished I could help her believe that. I walked to the hallway and stood in front of the bathroom door, listening for her, but I heard nothing. I knocked on the door and as I did, I heard her weeping softly. She didn't want to talk me, so my welcome was officially worn out.

As I made my way downstairs, I started to think about what to write on the note I'd leave behind for her. She was going to be fine, she just needed some space. Once I left, she would leave the bathroom and get her mind off of things. Once I reached the dining room, I grabbed the notepad that was lying there and ripped a sheet of paper out. I wrote

"I'm sorry Jules. I love you too much for our first time to not be just right. Please understand.

Chapter Two

"It's so full tonight. Maybe we'll se a ghost!"

Halloween in Amish Country is nearly undetectable in some areas. The stars came out really early that night. The moon was so big, we couldn't stop talking about it. Richie and I walked together trying to decide whether or not twenty years old was too old to go trick-or-treating. Before long, we turned the corner to the parking lot where my car was.

"Oh my god, I just came." He said as we laid eyes on my car. I slapped his arm and then grabbed onto it and held him close. He put his arm around me and we finished our walk to the car. I unlocked the door, opened it up and reached across to unlock the other door and when I leaned back over to my seat to shut my door, he kissed me right on the lips. I'm not going to lie; it was great. I instinctively pulled away a bit and blushed, and I looked up at him over the rim of my glasses and bit my lip. He smirked and sauntered over to his side of the car and got in without a word. I was also speechless as we left the parking lot to drive wherever.

I drove to the costume shop. We walked around the shop a little bit but couldn't decide on anything good, so we just made some calls and got hooked up with a decent college party. My friend Andrea went to Kutztown University and had a Halloween bash going on at her house. The great part about it was the "costumes optional" clause. We arrived and there were countless drunk people I didn't know and just about everybody was wearing a costume. Richie and I just kinda stayed close to each other and weaved our way through the crowd and found our way down the hall to her "smoke room" and sure enough, there she was.

"Close the door!" she yelled, fearing too much smoke would escape their hazy bubble. "Where's Jules?" she asked, observing the fact that I was preoccupied with another boy tonight.

"She is in Jersey with her family." I shot back, rolling my eyes.

"That fucking bitch!" said the saucy, stoned Jersey girl. "I'm so jealous. I wanted to go home so bad this weekend. Helena's parents went to Punta Cana for the week, so she's throwing a killer house party for three days straight, or so she says. I know its gonna end tonight, but I still wanted to be there. You guys gonna smoke?"

"Ummm.... No?" I answered her as I sat down next to her, stealing her blunt and taking a huge hit. Richie wasn't shy, but he liked to feel people out because he wasn't long out of the closet and was still uncomfortable sometimes. But then again, so was I. I just didn't care as much. He sat down beside me so I could give him a shottie. Before long, we were stoned retarded and we slipped $60 to Andrea and she gave us a quarter ounce to enjoy for the weekend.

"Oh my god T, how can you fucking drive now? I can barely open my eyes." Richie slurred.

"I'm experienced silly. Besides, that shit wasn't good enough to take away my ability to drive. Why, are you that fucked up?"

"Well, let's just say that I'm glad I'm not the one behind the wheel... Oh my god! Did you see that girl in the Cher costume? She looked like Amy fucking Winehouse."

We cruised back to my place talking about what we were going to do that night. We held hands in the car and before we knew it, we were in the driveway. As soon as I cut the engine off, my sobriety fled like a cockroach when the lights come on. We buried our heads in the leather headrests and mustered up the energy to walk into the house. It was so cold and the car was so warm.

"I have an idea baby. Let's have our own Halloween party here." Richie slyly suggested.

"There is no way. I'm fucking retarded. besides, its like 1 a.m." I shrugged.

"No... I mean LET'S have OUR own Halloween party... he he he."

After I figured out what he meant, I managed enough energy to leave the car and walk briskly toward the house. He lagged behind a bit, but I could tell he was thinking of something. We had slept in the same room before, but never in the same bed, and never did anything sexual together. He knew a few things about me of course, or else we never would have ended up together on Halloween.

A few weeks earlier, I had gotten a little drunk at a party and ended up eating some bad shrimp. To make a long story short, after puking my guts out I ended up on his couch asleep, more or less. He walked in to check on me and noticed I was sucking my thumb.

"Are you okay buddy?" He placed his hand on my shoulder and rubbed it softly.

"Mmmmm hmmmm." Was all I could manage behind my thumb in my state of half-drunk, half-asleep. It basically indicated that I was saying I was alright, but obviously lying.

"Awww, I'll check on you later baby boy." Was the last thing he said to me that night as far as I know, but the way he adored me created an allure I could not ignore.

Richie was a cute Jewish boy from Monroe, New Jersey. He was twenty years old, and he was short like me and had the softest black hair. His style was chic and sophisticated, but youthful at the same time. He was quickly my favorite.

Halloween night was technically already over, but we were focusing on the early morning of November 1st. He lead me into my living room and sat me down on the couch.

"Toby, would you like to have the greatest night of your life tonight?" He inquired deeply into my eyes.

"Sure. Let's watch a move!" I answered back, like the stoned jackass I was.

"Daaaazed and Confuuuused..." He answered like it was boringly obvious what I wanted to watch. Until then, I had no idea just how predictable I was becoming. It didn't bother me though. We melted onto the couch and watched the seventies come to life in hi-def.

"Oh my fucking word. We almost forgot munchies! You want Moose Tracks?" He jumped up to leave at a moment's notice.

"Ummm... Actually, could you go to Wal-Mart and get me some Pocono Paws? It's SO much better." I begged.

"It would be my pleasure." He said in mock-sarcasm. He grabbed his keys and headed for the door.

"You may need to wake me up when you get back."

"Uh-huh!" He said as he exited through the back door in the kitchen. I heard his WRX start up and before I knew it he was cruising away.

I drifted off and before I knew it, morning had come and Richie was in the kitchen frying some bacon and making coffee. I couldn't believe he didn't wake me up when he got back. I was a little annoyed, but since it was the weekend and he didn't have to work, I was going to take the whole day with him.

"How are you awake?" I asked him, groggily.

"How are you not? It's like 11 a.m! Sorry I didn't wake you up. You were just so cute, I couldn't disturb you. I just crashed on the waterbed in the lounge. Hope that's cool."

"Yeah, s'fine. Bacon? Bad Jew. Bad." I scolded him in farce.

"Did you have any plans for today?" He asked.

"Yeah, making sure you don't. Ha ha, but as far as everyone's concerned, I'm recovering from last night." I schemed.

He whirled around the kitchen and before you knew it, breakfast was served, and he was running out the door with a milkshake in his hand.

"Where are you going?!" I demanded.

"I'm just running home to let my dog out and make sure my sister came home last night. I need her to clean some shit up. I'll be back in a flash!" And just like that he was gone again. I slammed down some bacon and a bowl of Smacks before I decided to wander out to my car to secure my stash of Mary Jane. I left my backpack in the car along with my laptop. My windows were down to boot. I was lucky nobody ran off with my shit. I grabbed my stuff out of the car, rolled the windows up, and locked the doors. I went back inside and found my way down to the basement, where my lounge was located.

My lounge was the one safe spot in the house where we could smoke, party, or do whatever and nobody could see, hear, or smell what was happening. The walls were an electric blue, and the room was lit with bright white fluorescent lights that lined the room. There were also neon lights and black lights for partying and mood lighting. Surround sound was set up around the room with a subwoofer right in the center of the room, directly below the projector. My home theater was set up in front of the California-king sized waterbed which was fitted with satin sheets, microfleece blankets, and Egyptian cotton pillow cases. There was a bar in the corner of the room, and there were three sectionals which lined the other corners of the room. If there was one room on which I went all-out, that was it.

When I reached the lounge, I sat down on the middle of the waterbed and broke out my little green bag and packed a bowl. I took a couple of hits, then put on some Incubus and proceeded to check my myspace on my laptop. Nothing new, so I finished the bowl, put everything away, and laid down for a quick catnap.

I wasn't even out for a half-hour when Richie came in through the trap door in the porch. I guess he knew I'd be down there; that was my usual hang-out spot.

"Hi there baby boy!" He came down the stairs with a backpack in hand. My heart jumped because I had an idea what he had planned, especially by the sound of his greeting. He set the bag down on the bed beside me and unzipped it.

"What have we here?" I asked, looking on as if he was opening a Christmas present for me, or maybe a Hanukkah gift?

"Oh you'll see. Just be patient!" He pulled out a set of footed pajamas that were my size, a couple of baby blankies, a pacifier, some baby powder, and some baby lotion. I saw where this was headed and I was extremely excited. "Ooo! I almost forgot!" He ran back up the trap door. I was getting tired of him running off and decided to look in the bag for handcuffs but sadly, the bag was empty. I looked through the items, and picked up the pacifier for a closer look. It was a Nuk 5, a pacifier big enough to fit in my mouth comfortably!

"Ohhh! Did someone find his binkie? Don't get ahead of yourself!" He removed the binkie from my mouth and showed me the duffel he brought down. He unzipped it and pulled out another set of pjs and a bag of Bambino diapers! I stared at everything he laid out and looked at him with an innocent smile. I was very aroused and he could tell. "I don't even need to explain this to you, do I baby?" I answered him by scooting closer to him and placing my hands on his face and my lips on his. We started making out, and my hands found my way to his shirt, pulling it off to reveal his lean, cut chest and abs. But as my hands moved down a little lower, they found something else. As it turns out, he was wearing a pair of Pampers Underjams. I smiled at him again, and grabbed his crotch. He jumped back, and smacked me playfully. I pushed him down and started to kiss him passionately on the mouth, then his face, his neck, and down his naked chest. When I reached his belly, I started to undo his pants, revealing his hidden diaper, which I then undid, setting free his rigid cock. Thankfully, he hadn't used the diaper, or even baby powder, so he was nice and clean. I started licking his cock and then wrapped my lips around it and just started sucking the hell out of it. In the meantime my fingers were going to work, tickling his balls and his taint. He started to squirm a little bit, so I gave it all I had giving him the best blowjob of his life. Within a couple of minutes he came in my mouth and I swallowed every drop. It was my first time ever, so it was a little tough, but I took it like a champ I guess.

"Holy Hell! Have you done that before?" He asked. I shook my head. "Bullshit boy, that was so nice."

"I swear! Why would I lie? Its not like I've never gotten one before! It really isn't that hard. I mean, it really isn't hard, not after that! Ha ha!" He laughed at my corny joke but signaled me to lay down on the bed.

"Okay baby, now you can have this." He said softly as he slipped the binkie back into my mouth. I laid down and he went to work on undoing my jeans. As he slipped my pants off, my dick sprung up at the position of attention and he giggled. He kissed my forehead and started to play with my penis a little bit. At this point, I was so ridiculously horny that I would have done anything he asked. He took out a diaper and slid it under my butt. I just relaxed and let him take over. He took out the bottle of lotion and rubbed it all over my groin, paying close attention to my junk and slowly moving down my taint to my butt hole. Next, he opened up the baby powder and covered my diaper area with it. I wasn't ready for what he had in store for me next.

"I'll be right back sweetie." Richie walked up the stairs, and returned shortly with his jacket in hand. He pulled out a small zipper case that resembled a manicure kit, only bigger. "I have a surprise for you!" He sang.

As he unzipped the case, he pulled out a small bottle and a butt plug. Now I was really getting hot. At that point I was remembering the previous night when he promised me the best night of my life. It wasn't what I had in mind, but he definitely was more creative than I was in planning it. Earlier that morning I was pretty annoyed at how things had gone the previous night, but all of those feelings faded away and I soon forgot how the day began. I was so lost in him; he was so mysterious. How could there be someone so beautiful, so smart, so precious to me. There was someone who had so much in common with me that it defied description and I had found them? It seemed too good to be true.

"K, ready? Relax your hiney." He confirmed my willingness as I felt something cold on my anus; it was obviously lube. After that, I just bit my lip and relaxed. I felt him push the butt plug into my hiney as I was overcome with ecstasy. When I woke from my reverie, he was finishing taping the last tab on my diaper. I sat up and he held up my jammies and helped me step into them. I put my arms in and he zipped me up.

"All done!" He chimed.

"Not quite, silly." I corrected.

"What are you talking about?"

"Well, You brought TWO sets of jammies and a whole bag of diapers. You're telling me that you weren't planning on joining in with me? You are just being retarded now." He said nothing and just blushed. I pointed my hand toward the bed and he laid down. I slipped a diaper under him and lotioned him up and he started to get hard again.

"Oooooo, Hello!" I greeted his erection in passing. He would have to wait to get off again, of course. I sprinkled baby powder on him and rubbed it in. I pulled the diaper up between his legs and taped in snugly around his waist. He brought his knees together and just enjoyed the feeling between his legs. I then returned the favor by helping him into his pjs. Once we were all dressed, we started up the theater system. We threw in 'Friday Night Lights' and packed the bong. We blew some sweet smoke rings waiting for the movie to start, and eventually the bong was kicked, so we put it away. We were pretty buzzed, and just melted into each other.

"It couldn't be any more perfect than this, Richie." I whispered to him. The smile on his face changed from pleases to mischievous as he got up yet again.

"I beg to differ sweet pea." He walked upstairs and returned shortly with a half gallon of Pocono Paws and a spoon. I kissed him deeply and had a little party in my head because I had a bad case of the munchies. We fed each other ice cream until the half gallon was gone.

"You are so fucking fat Toby." Richie joked.

"Not as fat as you, you tub of lard." He tossed the tub into the trash and we curled up to finish the movie, attempting to warm up after eating all of that ice cream. I remember how warm his jammies felt against my face. His diaper was so puffy and soft, and it was making me so horny. What was going on inside my diaper was even worse. That butt plug reminded me of its presence every time I moved; it was driving me crazy! We just kept hugging and squeezing each other. Paradise was in my own home and it was so friggin' sweet.

Chapter Three

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November was turning out to be a weird month. Not only was I finding out just how in-love with my best friend I was, but I was also falling for the cutest boy ever, whom I met at a party only weeks earlier. Jules was back from Jersey for a few days, but I had yet to see her. I wasn't sure what she had been up to. We talked on the phone every night, but it was vague conversation. I knew I was leaving some details about Richie out of it, but that only made me fear what she was hiding from me. It seems impossible to fall in love when you swing both ways, but really its twice as possible and exponentially more complicated.

It was about 11 a.m. so we decided to get together for lunch. I hadn't grilled for a while, so I told her to come down to my place so that we could grill some chicken and flatbread. She had some things to take care of, but she suggested we head over to the park afterwards to take a walk and grab some smoke. I agreed.

When she got there, I was in the backyard in my apron flipping some chicken. She walked through the gate from the driveway and she was smoking a cigarette. Cool as ever, she came right over to me and gave me a hug and a kiss and set her purse down on the picnic table. I took the chicken off the grill, threw the flatbread on there for a couple minutes, pulled it off and prepared to eat. We sliced up the chicken and rolled it up and slammed it down so we could go for our walk.

"So how was Halloween in Jersey?"

"It was pretty sweet. I spent almost the whole time in Old Bridge, but I managed to make it to New Brunz to pick up some diesel. We played some beer pong at Allie's, but Kerri took us to Monroe to visit her friend Helena. Her parents were out of town so she had a house party..."

"...Don't tell Andrea that. She was supposed to go to Helena's, but threw a party at Kutztown. I went there that night. It was pretty good."

"...Anyways, Helena's party got busted up by the cops but nobody really got in trouble. I guess it was a noise complaint. The party only lasted for like 3 hours, then it got moved to EB, but nobody wanted to drive there, so we went back to Old Bridge hit the bars until they closed, then we crashed. What happened at Andrea's?"

"Well, there was mad people there and we had some pretty good smoke going on in the back room and I bought like a quarter off of her."

"What did you go as? I was Wendy."

"Wendy?"

"You know, Wendy. Like, from Wendy's?"

"Oh with the pigtails..."

"...yeah."

"...Right. I went as a confused young man who missed his best friend."

"I missed you too. It was boring without you."

"I know..."

At this point in our conversation, we were already halfway to the park and I was getting a White Owl out of my pocket so we could get ready to roll, but Jules pulled a half a blunt she had left over, which made it so much easier because I was so anxious to tell her the truth about me and Richie.

It was obvious that I was nervous. I'd never kept anything from her before and now that there was a new connection between us, it was very awkward.

"What's wrong, Toby?"

"What do you mean?"

"You won't stop fidgeting. You just flicked your lighter like, 300 thousand times. Are you on something?"

"No! Hell no, I just... I need to tell you something." I put the lighter to use and lit the blunt. I took a couple hits and passed it. "On Halloween I hooked up with Richie."

"Who's Richie?"

"You remember that party we went to in Fleetwood almost a month ago? You left early 'cause that shit was going on at your brother's house. I stayed 'cause I was so fucked up and sick."

"Oh yeah, the kid who owned the house? I remember him... He is cute though. But what's your point? You've hooked up with guys before..."

"Yeah but, didn't just make out..."

"You guys..."

"No... well, kinda. I dunno."

"You don't know?! Toby!!! Come on."

"I blew him."

"You blew him."

"I blew him and he babied me. We babied each other. It was crazy, it was fun, it was real. We were horny, we were high, and we were definitely enjoying every minute of it."

"Wow. I thought you went to Andrea's. Could you please tell me the truth with no gaps in between please?"

"We did. I mean I did go to Andrea's. I took Richie. We stopped at Andrea's for a couple of hours, smoked, bought some stuff and left. We ended up coming back to my place where I passed out. When I woke up, he was making me breakfast. He promised me the best night of my life, which ended up taking place all day Saturday. We smoked, fooled around, and then smoked again, watched a movie and cuddled. We napped and then later that night he had to leave to pick his brother up at the airport."

"And why couldn't you tell me this before? I mean, we always share our hook-up stories with each other."

"Well, I didn't want to hurt you..."

"Hurt me? Hurt me how? How would that hurt me?"

"Well, I mean, we just recently established that we love each other. I mean we always have loved each other, but... you know what I'm talking about."

"Yeah, that is true, but Toby, who says we're settling down? Let me know if we're on the same page here, but we are still both single adults who are enjoying that, right?"

"Yeah I guess so."

"I look at it this way. We confessed our love for each other, and all that did was POSSIBLY state an unspoken agreement that maybe someday we will be exclusive. Its more or less me telling you that you are my number one. You are the one person I love the most and I plan to always have in my life."

"Yeah, we're definitely on the same page. I love you Jules. I'm sorry I kept this from you and I really want you to know about everything in my life that I'm enjoying that you're not already directly a part of."

"Its fine. We should have talked about this a little more when we made that decision. Anyhoo..." She took at hit and passed it back to me. We were both starting to get a little buzzed. By now, the blunt was growing considerably smaller. "...How was it? Are you any good at giving head?"

"...Oh my god Jules... That sounds SO bad! Ha ha!" I buried my face in my hands for a moment before I continued. "According to him I was awesome at it, but who knows if he was just being nice. I dunno. After that though, we both put diapers and jammies on."

"Ooooo, didn't you say you babied each other?"

"Yeah, lotion, powder, pacifiers, the whole nine. It was incredible. He even snuck in a little surprise. Hee hee."

"Oh my goodness. I can't even imagine."

"A butt plug under my diaper. It was fucking crazy."

"Wow. I hear those are really fun for guys, but most guys are too insecure to try it."

I didn't even dignify that comment with words. I looked at her over the rim of my glasses with that 'Are you fucking serious? Do you even know who you're talking to?' look.

We continued walking a little further when my mind was finally able to shift to more important things, like what we were going to do together than night, with the short moment of silence I took when hitting the blunt which was quickly approaching the roach-stage.

"Do you wanna cruise around tonight? Like, up to the lake?"

"Yeah! Do you wanna bring Richie?"

"Sure, I guess I can call him. I haven't talked to him since the other night. He lost his phone charger at a party the other night."

"Okay... well that's good, cause I kinda wanna meet him again, just not as a guest at his house, ditching halfway through the party to handle drama."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure he'd like that too. I always talk about you. He knows all about where you and I stand, so I think he's been waiting it out for me to tell you about what happened with us. In fact, I wonder if he really lost his charger. Eh, fuck it. I'm gonna call him."

Jules just laughed at me talking in circles to myself and somehow making perfect sense. She took the final hit of the blunt and roached it. We slowly walked back to house as I took out my phone to call him. Jules and I looked each other in the eyes, held hands and enjoyed the mere existence of our friendship.

#########

It was nearing Christmas when I found myself in a particularly odd situation, at least for me. I was walking alone in a town called Orwigsburg. It was snowing lightly and there was a light dusting on the ground, but not more than an inch or two of accumulation along the sidewalks. It couldn't have been later than midnight because all of the bars were still pretty busy, but there was no traffic to speak of. The town was warmly inhabited, but clearly untouched. The streetlights and storefronts were all decorated in a classic fashion. This particular neighborhood was ageless and its infinite charm astounded me. There were times that I'd wanted to move there, but it was too far away from all of the creature comforts and shopping malls that I'd grown too accustomed to being close to.

Dressed in my duffer's cap, scarf, peacoat, and wool mittens, I stepped lightly on the sidewalk with no particular destination. I was not visiting a person that night; that night I was visiting the town. Orwigsburg gave me an opportunity to think about the mess I had gotten myself into. Even if Jules and Richie were okay with the way that our relationships were intertwined, surely there would be an end to it. There's always jealousy. I had no idea what to do, but I climbed back into my head as I walked by the snow-covered cars and illegible street signs. What would it be like if I only pursued heterosexuality? I don't know if I could ever forsake my other side. It seemed the other way around as well. I didn't want to feel forced to do either, but there I was in love with my best friend. Not only that, but I had been convincing her to stay around with me instead of encouraging her to go to college.

Richie made me extremely happy but I hadn't known him very long, and barely at all compared to Jules. It was very difficult to listen to myself think because the only one that was urging me to make a decision was myself! Jules and Richie got along, which seemed too good to be true, but my whole life since I graduated high school, with the exception of my Grandfather's passing, had been.

I noticed that my glasses were fogging up due to the fact that I was breathing into my scarf. My lips were on the verge of freezing and that told me that it was getting a little too cold to be out there this late without warmer clothes, so I finally roamed back to my car and decided to drive back home and get some sleep.

The roads were a little slick on the way back so I drove fairly slow. I was still in deep thought, so I flipped the radio on and jammed out to Country of all things. Tim McGraw's "She's My Kind of Rain" came on and I just let myself get lost in it. I couldn't stop thinking of her. I felt kinda guilty that I hadn't talked to Richie in a couple days, but I needed some time to myself.

When I got home, I walked in the door and realized that my furnace was not working properly. It was freezing cold, so I ran downstairs to check it out. There was still plenty of gas flowing into it, and it was on. However, it was not running anywhere near full capacity. The pipes wouldn't freeze if it kept on, but there was no way I was staying there the night. I threw some jammies on, threw my blankies and my puppy in my backpack and headed out the door.

I drove until I got to Julie's place. I rang the doorbell and she answered the door in her pajamas, holding a cup of hot chocolate. She tilted her head to the side and gave me an inquisitive look.

"My furnace is broke." I frowned and walked past her, through her kitchen and into her warm living room. She followed me and headed me off, taking her spot on the couch before I could.

"Well, I'm watching 'Lost' now, but feel free to crash on the bed or you can watch 'Lost' with me." She smiled at the latter option. She knew I wanted to cuddle with her, so she patted the spot on the couch next to her. I unzipped my bag and got my blankies and puppy out and cuddled up with her on the couch. She positioned herself so I could lay on her. She covered me with her blanket and held me in her arms. Naturally, I started sucking my thumb and drifted off to sleep.

I woke up to her pulling my pants off. As soon as she noticed I was awake she signaled me to lift my butt up by tapping it, meanwhile preparing to slip a diaper underneath me. I went with it naturally, but then I realized that they were Bambinos that she was putting me in. I immediately thought of Richie and wondered if he had something to do with it. I looked around the room. She knew I was looking for him.

"He ran to get ice cream, baby. We have a little surprise for you." She smiled as she finished powdering me and taping my diaper up. She found my binkie and slipped it in my mouth and soon nestled herself back onto the couch so she could continue holding me. I snuggled up against her warmly and she placed her hand on my diaper and patted my butt softly.

I didn't fall back asleep, but I did cuddle with her in reverie wondering what would happen when Richie arrived. Before I could even roll it around in my head, he came through the door quietly as if he was trying not to wake me up. As soon as he popped his head in the door though, he realized I was already awake. He saw me sucking on my binkie and then noticed my diaper sticking out under the blanket.

"Uh-oh! Somebody's awake! We have a surprise for you!"

"So I hear. I mean, you guys don't have to. Well, what is it?"

"More like 'who?'." Is all Jules would let on. I was really thrown for a loop then.

Chapter Four

They called her Daisy. Her real name was Destiny. She was a tiny girl who had just turned eighteen, but lived a great deal of her life out as a little girl still. Her parents were wealthy and offered her no need to attend college, or really ever work. She had just moved to our area from Portland, Oregon because she and Richie got along so well. Not to mention, she found out about my lifestyle and saw pictures of me, and heard of Jules' support of it all. She couldn't resist trying to put together a surprise for another adult baby, especially one she thought was adorable.

I had just stood up to give Richie a hug and a kiss when I heard a car pull up. I looked outside and saw a hot pink New Beetle with an electric blue flower paint job accenting most of the car I saw this little girl get out of the car, grab a duffel bag and a backpack out of the hatch and walk towards the stairs to Jules' apartment. As she walked in the door, I got a better look at her. She was very thin and couldn't have even been five feet tall. She wore a tight black hooded sweatshirt that had sleeves that covered her hands completely. She also had on some tight blue jeans. Richie and Jules went over to help her with her bags as I covered myself up. I honestly had no idea who she was yet.

"Awww, its okay baby! I'm Daisy! Come here buddy!" She called over to me. I waddled over to her as she put her arms out to give me a hug. I hugged her at first meeting. She had a warm, cuddly, needy, and somehow perfect hug.

"I'm Toby. Its nice to meet you. I'll be honest, this is all very surprising for me. I have no idea what's going on."

"I know, I know. It was supposed to be a surprise. I am Daisy. I'm a little rich girl from Portland, but please don't think me shallow." She said this as she brought her bags into the bathroom, turning around to deliver the last line. "I came over to play, buddy!" Then she disappeared inside and shut the door.

I turned around to Richie and Jules wondering what the hell they were up to.

Jules was the first one to try to explain. "Look, you have been doing so much for the both of us and there has been so much tension, no commitments that..."

"We found you a playmate!" Richie finished.

"You found me a playmate..." I was so perplexed. I kind of had an idea, but wasn't sure if I had the right idea.

Richie explained to me that he found her on an AB community website and they talked for a few months and decided it would be a good idea for her to move out our way. Her parents pretty much let her do whatever she pleased, as long as it wasn't illegal. Just as he finished, she walked out of the bathroom.

"Ta-da!" she sang as we turned our attention to the baby coming out of the bathroom. Daisy was wearing her blonde hair in little pigtails and she wore a baby blue baby tee and she wore a small bambino diaper. She popped a binkie in her mouth and scampered into the kitchen with her baby bottle and filled it with milk. "I wanna watch tv with my buddy!" She was extremely excited already and next thing I knew, Jules and Richie were donning their coats and preparing to leave.

"Where are you guys going?" I asked.

"We're gonna give you two time to get to know each other!" Richie answered.

"Be good you two!" Jules sang as they walked out the door, exchanging winks with Daisy.

I walked over to the love seat as Daisy got comfy on the couch. She popped her bottle in her mouth and flipped through the channels. She then looked at me, then sniffed herself and a very sad look came over her face.

"What's wrong?" I asked with concern.

"Don't you like me? Do I smell?" She asked, seemingly on the verge of tears.

"No! I'll sit with you!" I smiled and joined her on the couch.

"Oh! Who's this?" She pulled my puppy out of the blankets on the couch.

"That's Ranger. He's my puppy." I clued her in.

"Nice to meet you Ranger!" She hugged him, then gave him a kiss.

"Ruff! Ruff!" I pretended he was answering her.

"Want some?" She offered me her bottle and I accepted, sucking on it for a while until I was no longer thirsty. Then I noticed her squirming a little uncomfortably.

"Are you okay?" I wondered.

"Uh-oh!" She chimed as she looked down towards her diaper.

"Uh-oh? Is somebody pee-pee?" I asked, rhetorically. I got up to fetch her a diaper and some changing supplies.

"My bag is in the bathroom still." I grabbed the bag and brought it into the living room.

"Wow, you have a lot of different kinds of diapers in here! What kind do you want?" I was amazed. She had Bambinos, Molicares, Pampers size 7, Underjams, some cloth diapers with plastic panties, and some cloth training pants.

"I dunno... you pick! I can always get more toooooo." I decided to fit her with some Pampers. I laid the blanket down on the living room floor and she laid down on it. I put the diaper on the floor next to her, along with the baby powder, lotion, and baby wipes. I undid the tapes on her diaper and took baby wipes to her hiney and her private area. She was so clean shaven, it looked natural somehow. I wiped her clean and placed a clean Pampers Size 7 under her bum. I lotioned her diaper area and sprinkled baby powder on her generously. I was cooing to her and she was loving it soo much. I pulled the diaper up between her legs and taped it onto her.

"All done!" I queued. She sprung up and gave me a kiss! I definitely wasn't expecting it, but it was awesome. We sat back down on the couch and she started drinking her bottle again. She was squirming and rubbing her diapered butt up against me and grabbing at the front of my diaper. I was extremely aroused, but we stayed on the couch, feeding into each other and driving each other crazy.

"I gotta go pee-pee..." I let her know, and she responded with a horny "OooooOOOOoo." And placed her hand on my diaper as I let loose. She could feel it getting warmer and when she was sure I was done, she just rubbed it and then offered to change me. "Want me to change you buddy? Yoooou're soaked."

#########################

"How did you get here?" She asked me. It was refreshing to know that there was something about me that still remained a mystery. I proceeded to tell her about my grandfather, his passing, and all of the events that lead me to where I was. It was very conflicting, the situation I was in.

There was nothing subtle about the way she gazed into me. She wanted more. I was holding too much back because that's what I was used to. She was the first person I had felt embarrassed in front of in ages. I'm sure it had something to do with the fact that she was more like me than any other person I'd ever met. She was a near-mirror image of myself and that was a fact I could not ignore. We may not have grown up the same, but we were definitely indescribably similar.

I was in love with Jules; that much was true. The infatuation with Richie was definitely present, and at that point I found myself falling for Daisy. I didn't know what to expect. There was something I loved about my life at that point, but the emotional uncertainty that lingered between my lovers and myself was almost too much to contemplate all at once.

####################

I needed clarification, so I picked up my phone and started dialing away. The problem I had then, was that I kept hanging up the phone before anyone picked up. For the first time in ages, I was chickening out. After all of the risks, after all of the chances and gambles I had taken, with all of these people nonetheless, I was scared shitless of what they would ultimately tell me; however, I had no idea what that would be.

I decided to go over to Jules' house. I never spoke to anyone, I never consulted anybody. I just invited myself over to her house and once I got there, I just walked in. She had to be home. The lights and TV were on, but I couldn't see her in the living room. So I called her name. No answer. I found her in her bathroom doing her hair. The blow dryer; that's why she couldn't hear me. She caught my glimpse in the mirror.

"Oh my god! Toby! Are you okay?! What are you doing here?" She seemed a little startled, which I half-expected. The other half of me was used to coming in unannounced and being greeted nonchalantly.

"Just had a few things on my mind and thought I'd stop over. What are you up to?" I was calm and unoriginal.

"Well, what's on your mind?"

"Oh! Nothing, I don't wanna hold you up. You're getting ready to go out."

"NO no! I'm not going anywhere, I'm just doing my hair cause I just got out of the shower." I knew she was lying about the shower, because there were no towels in sight.

"Okay, when you're done maybe we can take a little cruise. I brought a White Owl."

"Or we could smoke here, I'm a little tired."

I just looked at her in question. My eyes asked her, 'Why do you have to lie to me?' and she heard them clearly. My mouth finished the query.

"I just came here to talk to you Julie." I turned around and walked into her kitchen and poised myself for egress. She followed me out, according to plan.

"You're right. We gotta talk about some things." We stood in a stalemate waiting for the other to begin. I continued toward the door and placed my hand on the knob. She thought I was leaving.

"Don't leave Toby." She begged. I pulled a cigar tube out of the inside pocket of my Carhartt. She knew I wanted to talk elsewhere.

"Okay. I'll be down in a minute." She was trying to get me to leave her apartment, to make a private phone call presumably.

"It's cold. I'll wait for ya." I argued. She took out her phone and sent a text message to someone. I let it go. She deserved her privacy. Besides, I figured I'd find out later on anyway. She sent the message and threw her coat on.

We sat in my car while I rolled a blunt. I decided to start off, finding myself on the offensive at this point. I was quite annoyed that she was hiding something from me and I wanted to find out what it was. I WOULD find out what it was.

"First of all, why are you being so fucking shady? What the fuck can't you tell ME? You're obviously not my girlfriend because you set me up with a complete stranger the other night in the most awkwardly confusing way possible, and now you can't tell me that you're going on a date tonight or even who it is you're seeing!What the FUCK!"

"Don't yell Toby, I know I've been shady, but I've been a little confused lately. Just recently, we confessed our love for each other and one would assume that the course of action would be for us to court soon thereafter. But we didn't. You hooked up with Richie and things changed. I Helped you find somebody more like you. Are you two supposed to fall in love? I have no idea. Do you deserve to? Like, oh my god, you guys are like the same person. Fuck yeah, but I mean, if you and I are meant to be, that will happen. I thought we agreed we were going to continue enjoying our single lives and see other people and end up together someday maybe, pending serendipity?"

I nodded my head in acknowledgement of everything she was saying. "Pending serendipity... I like that." I looked her in the eyes, but I wasn't satisfied. I didn't feel I had any justification of my actions, so I awaited her to spill more out to me.

"...Yeah, I know. I'm a fucking cornball. Look, Toby..." She didn't want to tell me, or maybe she forgot. I decided to remind her.

"So who's your hot date?" I inquired in good spirits.

"You don't know him." She answered.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" I joked, so she shot back.

"Well, I dunno... Are you gonna steal him away from me?" She punched me.

"Naw, you're much cuter than I am. You got nothin to worry about. Besides, I've got my fucking hands full." I laughed at my unusual situation and did my best to congratulate hers.

"Well, are we gonna smoke this or what?" She urged.

"Hell no! You didn't tell me who he is yet!" I snapped her back from reality as I proceeded to light the blunt.

"Okay. He's from Jersey. I met him at my cousin's party. He is in law school."

"Oh my god, Jules. Not a suit." I gagged in jest.

"He is probably even wilder than you so don't be so quick to judge."

"Does he do drugs?" I shot back quickly.

"No! Well, he dabbles in the organic." She rationalized.

"Ooo! Go on..."

"He is a skydiver by hobby and he waterskis in the summer, downhill in the winter." She plead.

I yawned to try to get under her skin, but I wanted to meet him. "He sounds full of shit." I got in another jab before I gave up and hit the blunt again.

"He is legit. I am telling you. I saw pictures."

I passed the blunt to her and she hit it a few times as I spoke.

"I don't want there to be any confusion Jules. I plan on seeing Daisy for a while and seeing where it takes us. We are very much alike, yet she has an undying respect for the relationship between you and I, and that is part of the foundation of the relationship between me and her. I told her that If that is compromised in any way, what is between me and her will be over. I expect you to have the same clause in your relationship with Airborne." I declared.

"By the way, his name is Andrew." she added.

"Okay. Airborne Andrew. I promise I won't call him that. Tee-hee, gay. Ha ha!" We laughed for a little bit and finished the blunt so that she could finished getting ready for the date that we had already postponed.

#####

Chapter Five

"Oh my god, I need these. Gimme the phone." Richie was skimming through some random shoe catalogue, and was going nuts over some Italian leather.

"You're an idiot. Never EVER order shoes out of a catalogue. If you want a nice pair of Mark Nasons, we'll go to the city." I chastised his inorganic lack of shoe-shopping savvy. Sometimes I wondered if he was really half-gay; or at least was beginning to see which half. I sat down next to him and basically lingered, baiting him into a conversation I wasn't exactly ready to have.

"Is everything okay Tobias?" Richie was really the only person I let call me Tobias. Besides, it wasn't really my name.

"No. I'm just feeling a little unsteady about the way things have been going lately." I shifted uncomfortably on the couch, trying to think of how to word the way I had been feeling.

"How is that even possible? You have EVERYTHING." He responded critically.

"I know that I have no right to be in want, but what I want is really important. I want to understand why I seemingly deserve what I have and why I am constantly confused about what I want when I can have everything I want at once." I managed to squeeze out in one breath, finishing with a heave.

"...What?" Richie seemed a little confused, and slightly upset about what I was proposing to him, but before he could get mad he decided to pick it apart a little more. "Please, for the love of God, be more fucking specific."

"I'm sorry, but I'm in a glorified love-rectangle, and I'm torn to pieced because I feel emotionally inept and unable to commit any guilt-free endearment, or even the slightest bit of devotion to anybody because I love you all so much... What the fuck do I do?"

"You can do one of two things. You can get everybody together for dinner and maybe a little 'shmokey shmoke' afterwards, or you can simply choose somebody. If I were in your shoes, I'd be terrified right now. I, for one, already am."

"...Why are you terrified?" I asked, not completely following him.

Before Richie could even answer me, he stared blankly at me in utter disbelief that I didn't know the answer to the question I just asked. He started to tear up.

"Richie, I... I don't understand. What's wrong?" I was genuinely concerned. I'd never really seen Richie cry before. I was getting scared.

"What if, Toby?" he sobbed.

"What if what, Richie?" I was generally frustrated in my lack of comprehension and began to wonder if my heart was made out of stone or cold, black misery.

"What if you don't pick me?" He broke down and fell into my arms, crying into my chest. As I held him, I ruminated on the turmoil in which I had placed those around me. What had been implied to me by some as mere casual dating was actually a trifecta of fucking emotional agony. Jules was showing the least concern over the position that we were in, presumably due to her new relationship with Andrew, but Richie was torn to pieces over the fact that he and I might not stay together. I never realized that he might truly be in love with me. The mutuality of our feelings was becoming clear, but I wasn't ready for it.

I felt progress in my attempt to sort out the mess of my personal life. I felt emotionally unarmed, or at least unsheltered. I literally had no unbiased party to run to at this point. The problem with boinking all of your friends is that it complicates things boundlessly. I was regretting not investing in a psychologist sooner. The only person I hadn't established lucidity with yet was Daisy. I was considering calling her later that night, but I decided to spend the rest of the day with Richie, and probably spend the night.

"Richie, I don't intend to leave you. I am just confused and I'm trying to figure some things out right now so that we can continue on happily. Don't you realize how unusual this all is? I mean, for as much bliss as I am living day-to-day, there is just as much perplexity besieging me. Do you understand? I need you too. This is not an attempt to break any bonds. I'm trying to strengthen them with common understanding." I explained to him, attempting to change the mood.

"I understand, but it scares me when you talk like this. I feel myself in competition with Jules and Daisy now. It makes me feel like an idiot when I think of when I teamed up with Jules to introduce you and Daisy. I feel like it's my fault things are complicated." He reasoned.

"Nonsense. I am so glad you introduced Daisy to me. The relationship I have with her is puerile compared to yours and mine. Not to say that the relationship you and I have doesn't have a special, youthful angle. If I had to look in a mirror to find something out, but wanted an answer that was contrasting with my current thoughts, I would look to her. But, I need you because you are so different from me. You have a fresh, urban, cheeky quality that I find absolutely endearing. I'm not exactly saying that I don't share any of those particular hallmarks with you, but most of the people I surround myself with don't exhibit those qualities the way you do, and if they do they aren't anywhere near as cute as you are!" I winked at him and he smiled at my encouraging monologue. I kissed his forehead and he sat up straight, holding my hands. He leaned in and I paralleled the motion, leading to a pleasant lip-lock that aided in reaffirming my affection for him.

As we kissed, I had already decided what I was doing with the rest of my day and where I would be spending the night. He held my face in his hands as our tongues explored each others'. I took off his shirt and started to kiss his naked, freshly-waxed chest. I licked and nibbled on his nipples for a short while before he pushed me down so we were soon laying on the couch. He worked my shirt off and ran his fingers through my hair and rubbed my bulging boner through my jeans. My fingers were running down his back and taunting the waistband of his underwear. Suddenly, we decided to continue things in the bedroom. We were both aware of where this was headed.

I followed him into the bedroom, and threw all regard for romance to the wind and stripped while running simultaneously. As soon as my last article of clothing (a sock) had been removed, I leapt into bed to join Richie, who shoeless, had a head-start on me. I saw him pick up a remote to flick on his stereo system for some ambient love-making music, no doubt. I started to feel him up for the first couple of seconds, really getting into it until I realized what song he put on. It was "Feels So Good" by Jamiroqai. I laughed my ass off when I first made the connection, but he urged me not to kill the mood, so naturally, I began to lick his penis to revive the, well... mood.

As I worked his throbbing boner, I decided to leave it extra slobbery as a subtle hint as to what I expected next. I teasingly stopped short and rubbed up against him briefly before turning around exposing my behind to him.

"Oh, you're gonna need more than a little spit!" He said confidently as I chuckled inside. He had 6, maybe 7 inches, but he wasn't anywhere near as devastating as he let on, but it was part of the game, so I let him grab his tube of lube.

He squirted some KY on his finger tip and rubbed it around my butt-hole and slipped a finger in to prime me for entry, as if I needed it at that point. He wiped his finger off with a nearby baby wipe and then coated his stiffy with the slick slime. He was slow and gentle when he pressed his head against my hiney. He breached my hole and slowly pushed into me. I was overcome with ecstasy as he slid in and began thrusting in and out of me.

"Come on Richie. Yeah. Yeah! Oh! Oooo!" I took it and ran. It was amazing. I began to stroke my own cock in conjunction with his thrusts, attempting to milk the sheer depth of the experience.

"You like that Toby, yeah you do. Take it you bitch." He had a sassy effeminate voice that resembled at 17 year old mall-rat girl, but so did I most of the time, so whatever. It turned me on. He spanked my ass a couple of times, which I admit felt pretty sweet, but before too long he was nearly spent. "I'm gonna cum, baby boy." He advised.

"Go... right... ahead!" I managed between thrusts. I was getting there myself, but decided to let him solve that problem after he came. Within a minute's time, I felt him shoot his juice into me and descend into his post-crescendo lamb state. He pulled out and wiped off. I laid down on my back, huffing and puffing, hard as a rock, face beet red. I tried to meet his stare to beg for conclusion.

He euphorically crawled to me and began stroking my cock and reached for a vibrator, switched it on, and slid it into me. Within minutes I was nearing one of the best climaxes of my young life. He pulled the filthy vibrating phallus out and wiped it, and tossed it on the floor. I laid down on the bed in exhaustion and slid my thumb into my mouth and mimicked a journey into dreamland. Before I could fall asleep though, my naked boy-lover had a fresh diaper in-hand and was ready to clothe me in a fashion he saw fit.

He slid the bambino under my bum and quickly powdered my groin and taped my diaper around my waist. I was feeling so sleepy, so he helped me into my footie PJs. He took me by the hand and led me into the living room, where I fell asleep in his arms, holding my blankie and my puppy.

I awoke at about 8PM to Richie slipping the nipple of a bottle into my mouth. It was Land O' Lakes hot chocolate with a slight hint of raspberry. I nursed the bottle and noticed that Richie had been watching Project Runway. I was still feeling sleepy, but I could tell that Richie wanted to smoke, so when I was done with my bottle, I walked with him over to the dining room table, where he had a freshly-rolled blunt ready for the smoking.

I grabbed the remote to his living room stereo and put on some Medic Droid and we passed the brown beauty around taking hits, blowing shotties, and generally talking about our plans over the rest of the week.

"Are you staying here tonight?" Richie asked as I passed the blunt to him.

"Of course! Let's watch a movie though. I wanna watch 'Across the Universe' again. That movie was fucking sweet." I suggested.

"You got that right. Last time I saw that, I was tripping baaaaaallls." He laughed a little bit, and we began to realize that we were pretty lit, so we cut the blunt about halfway.

"We'll finish it later?" I advocated.

"Yeah, or tomorrow. Whichever. Is 'Across the Universe' still On Demand?"

"I think so."

We proceeded to the living room, where Richie got the idea to check my diaper to see if I was wet, which I was.

"Uh-oh! somebody made pee-pees! Lay down on the couch little guy." He sang.

He unbuttoned the snaps in the crotch of my PJs and changed my diaper. When he finished, we watched our movie and spent the rest of the night together, enjoying every minute.

Chapter Six

I woke up in Richie's bed. The smell of breakfast was not in the air that morning, so I assumed he went to work. I got out of bed, changed out of my baby clothes and hopped in the shower to start the day off. After showering, I looked at the clock and it was already 11 A.M. After shaving and brushing my teeth, I threw on a pair of Underjams and some designer jeans and a black polo with a white and pink-strped tie. I then went to the bathroom to do my hair. My hair was getting longer pretty quick. It was dyed black, but the brown roots were starting to show. I thought about going to the salon, but decided to make an appointment for Tuesday. I sprayed the shit out of my hair to form the organized chaos that was my "do." After I was done with my hair, I sat down on the toilet seat and quickly did my nails. I was burning daylight pretty quickly and wanted to get ahold of Daisy before she made plans with someone I else. I had to talk to her so fierce.

I found a note from Richie on his kitchen table. He had to run out of town for a photo shoot for the weekend. My plans just became less complicated. I grabbed my cellie and called Daisy.

"Yo." She answered.

"Good morning, sweet thing!" I sang to her.

"What's left of it, I just got up. What are you doing today?" she inquired.

"Well, I was sort of going to ask you first. I'm leaving Richie's now. He has a shoot in Philly, so he left before I got up."

"I'm not doing anything if you wanna come over. I made pudding!" She exclaimed.

"Yay! I'll be over in like 20 minutes. I'm getting some Dunkin. You want anything?"

"Donut holes!!!"

"I'll grab a dozen for you. I could kill a close family member for a bagel right now."

"Well, please don't. *smooch* I'll see you soon, baby boy." She said sweetly as she hung up abruptly.

I threw on my jacket, grabbed my car keys and my bag and I headed down to my car. As I headed down the stairs, I felt just how tight my polo shirt was on me, and felt it riding up a little bit, revealing the waistband of the diaper that was disguised as underwear. I thanked goodness for my jacket covering it up. As much of an exhibitionist as I like to think I am, I had so much on my mind that I wanted to keep things simple that day.

As I cruised down the road, I enjoyed the sanctuary I found in my muscle car. I wondered where I was headed in my life, but decided that I enjoyed not knowing. I glanced over at the baby-blue pacifier hanging from my rearview mirror and considered how fortunate I was to have so many people that accepted me the way I am and that knew how to delight in it. It was truly amazing. Who cares where I was going? Where I was was all I needed.

I arrived at her apartment and parked next to her Beetle. I knocked on her door, and she answered wearing a pink tee-shirt and a purple mini skirt shat showed off the diapers and frilly panties she wore underneath. She gave me a big hug and kissed me on the lips. Her lips were so soft and her hair was so silky. She smelled like baby powder and orchids. I gave her the little box of donut holes I bought for her. She was watching dragon tales and playing on the computer.

This was only me second time at her apartment, so naturally my eyes wandered as I took notice of sever brands of diaper packages strategically placed near the bathrooms and the changing mat she had in her living room. She had countless baby bottles and boxes of baby cereal in her kitchen ready for any mealtime. At the present time, she was nursing a sippy cup full of red juice though. She had stuffed animals all over her furniture and pillows all over the floor. As clean as the kitchen, dining room, and bathrooms were, her general living spaces like her bedrooms and living room would appear to the untrained eye as messy. However, I knew they were merely play rooms designed for quick access of different toys, blankies, binkies, and so on. I envied her in a way. She truly had nothing to hide. She didn't know anybody that didn't know she was an adult baby.

"So Toby, what was goin on at Richie's last night?" She inquired.

"Oh, nothing interesting. We talked for a while." I said vaguely.

"Talked him right into bed, eh?" She smiled and winked. She had an idea of what may have taken place the previous night.

"Okay, we did some stuff and it was great, but that's neither here nor there." I blushed, and nervously tried to change the subject. "I need to talk to you about some things. I'm having some issues that I need you to help me out with." I pleaded.

"Well, before you start, can I get you some cocoa? Its effing freezing out!" she offered.

"Sure! I'm on a cocoa kick lately. You ever try the Land O' Lakes cocoas? They're like, soooo bomb."

"That's actually the kind I have. I got it as a housewarming gift from Jules. I drink it nonstop. I'm almost out, but I'm planning on going shopping later. I'll pick some up then."

She sang to herself as she made me some cocoa and put it into a bright blue sippy cup for me.

"Do you feel like getting changed into something a little more comfy?" She asked, fidgeting coyly like a nervous little girl, suggesting baby clothes.

"Definitely, but I wanna talk first. I don't wanna lose my train of thought." I smiled at her, letting her know I intended to have fun with her very soon. She came back into the living room and handed me the sippy cup. It was just the right temperature.

"So what do you wanna talk about, Toby?" She wondered.

"Well, as you know, I am in an extremely unusual situation regarding my love life." I explained and she nodded in agreement. "To cut to the quick, Jules is in a relationship with a man named Andrew now, so that's not the difficult part, but Richie is head-over-heels in love with me and I love him too, but I like not having that exclusive commitment. But I am not okay with hurting any one of you in spite of that. I explained to Richie yesterday that you are like my mirror image because I have more in common with you than anyone else, so I enjoy your company because of my inherent gay narcissism." I joked while trying to make a point simultaneously. She seemed to be catching my drift because she was chuckling and didn't look confused. I continued to see where I stood with her. "I just want to make sure that in all of this you are not being hurt. I love all of you, and we all have different roles in each others' lives, and I want everybody to be happy. I have been a little confused, but if I have a decent confirmation of everybody's willingness to continue on the same way we've been, I'll be much more comfortable."

"Wow. That was a mouthful. Toby... I entered this friendship of ours knowing everything about you and Jules and Richie. It's exciting and different and I love it! Clearly, none of us are afraid of stepping outside the box in this society. I just want you as my baby-buddy and best friend. I love you Toby, no matter what happens with your choice in lovers. I know we will still have each other. We all have an impeccably unique philosophy for this part of the country, but it really is awesome. Just don't worry about me. I know who we are and what this. I love you. Leave it at that." She reasoned with me, and upon her words I felt much better. I felt like my quest for emotional clarity was over and I could finally return to my life, without further confusion.

"I guess we're done with this discussion. I love you too and I'm ready to enjoy our day together." I concluded.

"How about getting you changed into something more comfortable?" She suggested.

"O-tays." I submitted. She grabbed me by the hand and led me into the bedroom. She took my shirt off and in doing so, noticed the minor bulge in my jeans.

"Uh-oh! Looks like we were already wearing today!" She squeezed the front of my Underjams and noticed they were still dry. "Ohhh, we were a good boy today! Well, we will reward you with something more comfy!" She unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them down to my ankles and I stepped out of them. She then followed suit with my Underjams, taking them off and folding them with my jeans so I could wear them whenever I left. "Lay down." she instructed, so I laid down on the bed and waited for her to fix me up. She pulled out two Bambinos and a baby blue tee-shirt. She slid the first diaper under my butt and then spread baby lotion all over my diaper area and then applied plenty of baby powder. She pulled up the front of the diaper and taped it around my waist and then put the second diaper on. I was so comfortable and perfect. She pulled the tee-shirt down over my head and I put my arms through the sleeves. It was a little cold, so she pulled out two large silk-lined polyester baby blankies and wrapped them around me and we walked to the living room to watch some TV.

Daisy was a stoner just like the rest of us and since she had money, she dared to be a little more ostentatious in her recreational inspiration. In short, she had a nice fucking vaporizer. It was clean, it was healthier, and it was way different than what I was used to. I noticed whereas my apartment was quite messy in some spots due to the preparation of my marijuana consumption, there was not a single clue in her apartment of her affiliation with the substance. She was extremely classy about the whole business.

We sat on the couch and she started the device up and we took turns inhaling the vapor. It felt so much better than actual smoke and brought a slightly different feeling. Once we'd had enough, we wrapped ourselves around each other on the couch and cuddled under the blankets to watch a movie. She rubbed my diaper and I felt hers. She slid her fingers into mine and tickled my cock every now and again. I felt up her shirt a few times and she giggled, rubbing her butt up against me a few times. I slid two fingers in through her leg gathers and noticed she was wet. I motioned for her to lay down on the changing mat and I took to taking her diapers off. She then returned the favor, suggesting she wanted something more. As soon as my diapers were off, she grabbed onto my hard cock and began stroking it furiously, while rubbing her clit. We locked lips and kissed passionately. I rubbed her titties and stimulated her nipples with my fingertips. She bit her lip and arched her back. I knew she was ready for me when she looked at me with those big blue eyes with... that look.

I hovered over her in a teasing fashion as she held onto my cock, ready to slide it into her moist, welcoming pussy. After making sure she really wanted it, I lowered myself onto her and started to slide my cock into her. It didn't take me very long to discover that she was a virgin. I looked at the pain in her face as a tear ran down her cheek, but that soon melted away as she enjoyed the pleasure that was overtaking her. I was slow and gentle at first, but slowly magnified my vigor upon her indication. As I did, she reached for a pacifier and put it in her mouth quickly. She was holding back moans, loving every second. Her hands were all over my back, but she didn't scratch me. She was so gorgeous; her tiny frame was grinding back against me with every thrust. It took less than ten minutes and she was already on the brink of orgasm. She was arching her back, gasping, and moaning; holding tight against me. I decided to gauge how close she was by bluffing.

"I'm gonna come soon." I warned her, in farce.

"Me too, just hold out a little longer..." She pleaded quietly. We slowed down a little and took in every little movement. I could go at any moment, but waited for her. within seconds she was ready. "Just go." she consented. We came simultaneously and experienced something sublime. She was absolutely fulfilled and a tear rolled down her cheek as I dismounted her. Afterwards, I held her tight while she recovered. After a minute or two, she got up and went to the bathroom to clean up. I started to follow her, but she asked for privacy which resulted in me laying back down and putting my diapers back on, then my blue tee-shirt. I was warm and kinda sweaty, so I cracked a window and enjoyed the breeze while I got things ready for her.

She scampered back into the living room with a huge smile and laid down on the changing mat. I pulled two clean Bambinos out and put one under her. I lotioned her diaper area and powdered her generously. I then leaned in and kissed her softly on the lips. I then finished the job of taping her diapers onto her. I reached for a pair of frilly panties, but she opted not to wear them I grabbed a clean pastel yellow peasant-style sun-dress and slid it on over her head.

After she was dressed, she fell into my arms and hugged me tight. "It was so perfect..." She said.

(*End of Post*) [feedback would be greatly appreciated!!! Thanks!!!]

[CandiPiglet]

Should I repost this is smaller parts? I'm not sure if I should go on with this story or not. Does anybody like it?

[lil_mikey]

I've enjoyed it quite a bit. The jumping around took a little getting used to, but I started to like it.

[CandiPiglet]

I've enjoyed it quite a bit. The jumping around took a little getting used to, but I started to like it.

Thanks, I'm working on filling in some transitions now. As a rough draft, I have just thrown scenes down on paper, so to speak, that I thought would add up to a good story. I figured it would be a little tough to understand for some at times, but I thought I'd see if the general theme of the story generated enough interest to put in the hours like I have so far. Thanks again, I greatly appreciate the feedback and I'm glad you like it

[babykatie1]

excellent story! a little jumpy but Great

[babykatie1]

stupid double post

[CandiPiglet]

excellent story! a little jumpy but Great

Thanks a lot!! I will fix the jumpiness. gimme a couple weeks - a month or so... I am about to go to Kuwait and then to Iraq, so when I get settled I'll be able to post more consistently! Thanks again!