Hiddenclaws

Hey! I never know how to begin. So, I'm Cath' (short for Catherine, btw it's french so it's pronounced like the word "cat") and I'm a 20 years old girl. I've been willing to be a part of this community for a while, ever since it struke me that repressing my little side wasn't going anywhere. That was about two years ago. I've been a little/ AB for as long as I can remember, and it's always been a problem for me. I mean, besides having to hide it, all I ever wanted was to be "normal" because of other issues I had. So I spent half my life wanting to let go and the other half hating myself for that. When I turned 18, for the first time I didn't live under my parents' roof anymore. Being kind of overly cautious (aka paranoïd), I would have never dared to have diapers in a place anyone could find them. But in a internship, it was different, so for the first time I gave a shot at being okay with the whole AB thing and bought adult diapers. From that point, although it was tough accepting it, I understood that it wasn't inherently hatable, meaning that I just wrongly convinced myself over the years that I had to hate myself for being little. A big part of this process was being able to tell someone. My best friend was very kind and I knew for a fact that he wouldn't care at all, worst case scenario, it would become a joke between us. As planned it went very well and it helped me a lot to work toward acceptance of myself. About a year ago, I moved in in my own place, so, not only there wasn't anyone to be nosy, I also had my own mailbox, meaning being able to order stuff online. I spend the least money I could and am to this day very satisfied with what I got. I'm especially glad that adult pacifiers exists. Anyway, when I tried for the first time to join an ABDL community, I still had a lot of trouble with being little myself, so that wasn't helping. But the real issue is that I never really felt like I would get along with the people. There is not a lot you can talk about with a subject that specific and you need more than just this thing in common to become friends. So, I'm giving this another try hoping that I was wrong to believe that. I'm looking forward to find potential friends.