justforfun

I've used cloth for bedwetting for a long time, and once I figured it out (multiple thin layers for easy wash and dry, folded in a way that works for me to prevent leaks) cloth has been great for night. But... over the last month, and for the next month, I've had the opportunity to wear 24/7, as long as it is cloth. So, I've been trying a bunch of options and boy, it is definitely harder to wear cloth during the day. As @Enthusi said, the bulk and smell, which is not a big deal at night, is quite a bit more annoying when you have to deal with it all day... So, one of the solutions I've gravitated to (besides just wearing a thinner version of the night-time prefolds) has been the ACD cloth pull-ons (https://www.adultclothdiaper.com/Adult-Pullon-Flannel-Diapers_2). They launder easily, aren't too uncomfortable, and can be pulled up and down as needed. You could stick a disposable pad in there if you wanted to. A PUL pant over it is pretty breathable. Maybe that would help?

It would be more effective to make it a Big Red Button labeled "DO NOT PUSH"

Unfortunately it looks like those are "Discontinued due to high import fees." Bummer. That said... I'm not sure it would solve the problem? In that, for cloth, bulk = absorbancy. If I need a certain absorbancy, it's a certain amount of cloth, which has a certain bulk. I find myself needing more absorbancy than I'm willing to put up with in terms of bulk when in public. Back to the whole thing about not wanting to let my underwear preferences (or, alternatively, my wife's preferences for my underwear) interfere with my real life and job. If I'm just hanging out at home, I have plenty of night-weight diapers, stuffers, etc., that are very effective that I would never wear in public. Anyway, I continue on a quest for a 'magic' re-usable that will hold a bladder+ and also, magically, not be noticeable on a relatively thin guy wearing shorts and a t-shirt...

So, a little update. I went out and got a number of the various options mentioned here... Ecoables, some various Amazon pocket diapers and covers, snap diapers... I spent quite a few $$ on options. One thing that is clear to me is that wearing re-usables consistently during the day is much harder than just using them at night for bedwetting! At night, bulk doesn't matter, and I'm only changing into the diaper, and then out of it. Washing is not a big deal with a once-a-day diaper. During daytime, a lot of the equation changes. While I've occasionally worn cloth during the day, I don't think I've ever done so consistently for such a long time since I was first out of diapers. First, comfort becomes a much bigger deal. Sitting on a lumpy diaper on an office chair all day every day is not that comfortable, even though I'm working from home. Using thinner diapers for comfort means more changes. More changes means more wash. Second, discretion. I pretty much bailed on going out in reusables that I planned to use at all. I haven't yet found any solution that I think is both discreet enough and actually usable for any reasonable length of time. I ended up getting some various training pants and versions of 'washable adult incontinence underwear' that I could wear, but not really use except when I'm almost home and willing to accept a leak. Third, schedule. With the night diaper, the 'on' and 'off' times are easy... bed time, and waking. During daytime, the changes are based around variable external things, such as needing to run errands (necessitating a thinner diaper), or wanting to hop in the pool, or many other things. Figuring out what I should be changing into, and when, is much more complicated. At first I found myself changing out of a barely wet diaper because I needed to be wearing something else. As time has gone on I eventually adjusted my schedule somewhat so that the changes fit more naturally and were more predictable. So far, I find myself gravitating to usually using flat pinned diapers around the house. I found that an 'Angel Wing' fold minimizes the uncomfortable lump on my butt, and I can adjust the absorbancy by adding a stuffer. Wearing PUL pants over the top keeps things reasonably cool. It's easy to wash and dry. We'll see how things go for the next two weeks, but boy, I definitely have a better understanding of what the folks who wear cloth 24/7 go through...

I trained myself back to bed wetting in the early 2000s. I always assumed I could reverse it. When I got engaged and married in 2006 made an attempt to get dry again, but it was kind of half-hearted... I felt I should try, but I think that I didn't really want it, so I gave up. I assumed I could be dry if I really wanted it. When my daughter was getting out of diapers in about 2013 or so, I tried again, and this time I really did want it. Being the only one in diapers, especially now that I was wearing cloth, was a pretty serious lifestyle issue. I tried everything I could think of, for more than a year, while my daughter got out of diapers in a matter of weeks. At some point, my wife had had enough my attempts resulting in wet beds, couches, and car seats, and insisted that I was to be diapered whenever I might fall asleep... And that was pretty much when I realized I wasn't going to be getting out of night/sleep diapers.

Thanks Stroller an Zzyzx for your insight. I'll look into getting a sampling of the snap/popper pocket diapers and see how that goes... I realize cloth won't work everywhere, despite spousal expectations. While I usually work from home I've got some important customer meetings where I'll take advantage of the fact that I'm not actually dependent on the diapers and wear a thin disposable pull-up or such... I wouldn't let underwear preferences get in the way of real life. Or, maybe I can make a 'training pant' work... Hmmm...

Thanks for the replies Christine and Rusty! I appreciate the suggestions. I currently use cloth (generally multiple layers of pre-folds, pinned on) for my bed wetting, so I'm quite familiar with the ins and outs of thicker bedtime diapers. The setup I currently use consists of multiple thinner pre-folds folded in a way that doesn't leak even with multiple heavy wettings at night and being a male side sleeper. It is not, however, remotely subtle, or comfortable for daytime use. I'm hoping to get some recommendations for some more daytime-friendly diapers. I could of course just use a thinner single layer of prefold or such, but do people have success with other options, such as pocket diapers, or any of the many cover-and-a-stuffer options I see on Amazon? Are they effective? Discreet enough to wear around others without showing a clearly puffy diaper butt? Edit to add: in particular I'm looking for diaper-like products... That is, products that can be changed without having to take shoes off, pull up and down, etc.

Not going to repeat things, but if anyone in this subforum didn't see the post there I'd appreciate your input.

TL;DR: looking for suggestions for reusable diaper options for summer. So, looks like I might have an interesting summer. A week or so ago my wife approached me with a suggestion. She and the kid will be spending July and August with her family on the other coast, and she, to my surprise, actually suggested that I should wear diapers all the time while they are gone. My wife is a rather active environmentalist, in particular around single use plastics, and so my use of disposable diapers never really sat well with her. She is the reason I started using cloth diapers for my bed wetting many years ago. This leads to a directive that if I do choose to do this, I will not be buying any more disposables. I can buy additional reusable supplies, but any disposables I use would have to be from existing stocks which, while not zero, isn't terribly huge. It will mean that I'll need to carefully think about where I use some of the fewer thinner disposables I have for social situations, and I'll probably need to figure out how to make cloth work in more situations if I'm going to try to abide by the 'rule'. Also she has told me she will be hiding my normal underwear. While this is of course a problem solvable in a quick trip to a store, the intent to make me commit is clear. So I agreed to that. So, July 1st is the start of this. While I have a significant amount of cloth diapers for nighttime, primarily pre-folds, I'm going to need more daytime-friendly options. I'm putting together a list of additional supplies… more lighter weight diapers, covers, breathable plastic pants, and so on. If anyone has suggestions for reusable products that work for daytime, I'd be very interested in hearing about them.

Can confirm. I normally order a Medium in most clothing and onesies. An XL did not fit. And they are crap.

Well, I primarily wear cloth for 'real' usage, which, for better or worse, means that the black bin o' disposables has a fairly varied, and random, collection of single bags of disposables I've bought or tried as travel options, or because they looked interesting, or just because. What this means is that I have a pile of generally white disposables that I don't know where to file... I know that that Megamaxes have a 'NS' on the tabs... but many of the incontrol, rearz, foresite, and whatever else I bough a bag of are sometimes a random grab-bag if they're not in their branded packing. This means that sometimes I have a "Hey, that worked great! I didn't leak! What the heck was it?" moment. So... having at least a subtle brand and size indication on each diaper is pretty helpful for those of us not familiar enough to know by feel for every random white plastic diaper...

Yup. I've played around a little with some cages and it does keep things rather more centered. It also tended to kink (heh) the urethra a little, which made peeing overall more difficult and slower.

Really nicely done story so far. Can't wait for it to continue!

Agree with the two edged sword. Having trained myself back to sleep-wetting in my mid-20's, I felt much more comfortable with myself, as there was a "reason" to my wearing diapers, and in fact, I "had" to wear diapers. Of course, when life happened, I got married, kids, etc., there are certainly time when I wish that I hadn't done that. In fact, I tried twice, unsuccessfully, to get dry again. So it's a life now of diapers anytime I might fall asleep, and managing that. Given the "acceptance" aspect to the topic, the (third?) edge is that of acceptance of my spouse. She has fully accepted the situation, to the point where she expects me to be wearing protection pretty much anytime it might be a problem, including, for instance, watching TV when I might fall asleep. A lock into the dependency can certainly happen, and be very difficult to un-lock.

Um. Ok. Yes? I taught/trained myself something new... that releasing the bladder when sleeping is fine. That is indeed new knowledge that I practiced as an adult? I can only give my anecdotal answer, which is that I will possibly wet sometime after I fall asleep, but not when I'm awake. Can I prove it? Um, I have 20 years of personal experience, but, as you said, I "will not provide citation for one to claim as 'fake news' etc." Not sure if this is relevant or not. You're making the claim that it's common, but refusing to substantiate that claim? That was the question I was asking... _why_ do you claim that it's a common progression? Ok? Not sure how that relates to the conversation or claim that _if_ one trains one's self to wet while asleep that: On what basis do you make that claim?

"[Citation Needed]" While I think that the path you lay out may be the fantasy, I don't see the reality of what your saying play out either in my life, where I trained myself back to sleep-wetting, or from when I talk to other adults who sleep wet. While I may wet anytime I fall asleep, be it bed, chair, or car, I have had zero issues while awake. While that's a "n=1" case, I also don't hear stories of adult who are "natural" enuretics experiencing unusual daytime problems?

Are you saying that because pointing up leads to leaks? Better diapers help that... maybe this is your body telling you that you should be in cloth diapers at night!

There are a lot of... claims... there. All I can say is that I trained myself to be a bedwetter over 20 years ago, in my mid-twenties. It took time, of course, but I convinced my brain that it's ok to pee when ever and where ever I am. If I fall asleep, or nap, there's a good chance I'll wet. I have tried to reverse that twice, actively trying to become dry at night. Both times failed. So far (20+ years...) I have had no issues during the day in the form of wetting or messing. So, I guess I can only say that the claim that everyone who re-trains bedwetting will had day-time wetting and messing problems is not accurate, at least for n=1. So I'm not sure what you're trying to say here?

I wrote about these in the 'Bondage' subforum. They can be used to keep cloth diapers on, but as the cloth stretches they aren't all that effective. They work better to secure onesies or clothing over the diapers... I've also used them through a cloth belt to keep pants on. So many other options too! Without the magnetic 'key' they're pretty much impossible to remove.

Hmmm... while I see what you're trying to say, i think that in my opinion you take it too far... When at home, I wear cloth diapers and they work well. I'm familiar with what they can do, and how to get them to work well, with only rare leaks. When I'm traveling I wear disposables. As a side-sleeper, they are much less reliable for me, even with plastic pants. Leaks are not unexpected. Although I have a thin bedpad that I carry, I haven't found one that reliably will stay in place over night, and I tend to move a lot, so it's not impossible that the leak will be onto the bed, despite efforts. Bottom line... I've been traveling as a bed wetter for 20+ years, and leaks happen. As a responsible person who knows the limitations of all the precautions I take, I'd rather give them the option to help protect their property... and some do, and some don't. But it's not a 'getting your jollies' thing...

A very good friend of mine in the age range you indicate in your profile recently went through a difficult situation, where a serious infection due to a prostate biopsy gone bad left him temporarily incontinent, and not just the "a few drips" kind of incontinent. Not being the kind of guy to avoid social events due to such an inconvenience, he let a few of us know that he was having some "man problems" as a result of the situation, and he hoped we'd not make a big deal of it. Rather than others ribbing him or giving him a hard time, he got a few us us on his side, and nothing happened. He didn't know about my situation, and while I considered 'coming out' to him about my bedwetting, I ended up choosing not to. It took a few months, as the infection had buried well into his prostate and was apparently drug-resistant, but as far as I know he has recovered. Point here... I agree with others that the likelyhood of your keeping a secret are small (to non-existent) on this kind of trip. Getting out ahead of it with a, "I just want to let you know I'm having some 'man problems'... don't get old, haha... but I would appreciate not making a big deal of it..." might end up getting a little support and heading any comments off before loud questions start being asked in a bar...

In the 'before times' I traveled a lot for work... "a lot" meaning United 1K, so I've had my share of experiences. I always travel diapered, first because I want to :), but also because I will wet in my sleep pretty much anywhere, and I'll usually fall asleep on the plane. If it's an international trip and I'm jet lagged, I might fall asleep anywhere. So, whether I "want" to or not, a diaper is usually warranted. I'll wear something thinner (Molicare Super Air Premium used to be my go-to) for short flights or ground travel, and something a lot thicker (Betterdry, or 24/7, or such) If I'm settling in for a trans-continental flight. I've found the US (with TSA-Pre) usually the easiest to get through. I rarely have any issues at all wearing disposable and a onesie. Asian airports... no one cares at all. I don't think I've ever been bothered going through China, Korea, Japan, India, etc. They're mostly concerned with keeping the lines moving. European airports are where I've had the most problems, in particular Frankfurt for some reason... several times there I've had had to whisper "Windel" to the security person as they poked, prodded, and tried to figure out what the bulk was. Of course, no one I knew or cared about was there, so I was able to easily just carry on once things were straightened out.

I'm enjoying this! Only suggestion might be to slow down, add more details around the events, build the characters, etc. Or not.

Can you give a pointer to the kinds of shapewear that works for you? Is it high-waisted? With or without leg/thigh coverage? onesie-like, over the shoulders? I'm interested in looking into something like that when I have to wear a disposable for traveling, but a perusal of the amazons doesn't show me something I'd think would work very well... As for the cloth liner in a disposable... experimentation a few years ago showed that they help wicking or spreading a lot, but in the end I decided that both paying for the disposable and having to do the wash was a double waste, so just went the full cloth route (I just have to use them for sleep wetting.) The times where I'd be using a disposable would be traveling or such where laundry wasn't viable anyway. I'm curious how the bamboo diaper liners work...

I forget if you've said where you're headed on this trip... but shipping a package to yourself at the hotel has worked for me before, and gets around the whole 'what's in that second bag' question. I've also been lucky sometimes and found a place with an Amazon locker near the hotel, allowing easy discreet pickup locally of supplies. Dealing with sharing a room... well, I've always just said no... and I dealt with the associated costs... but that's me.