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BlakeJordan
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Posts posted by BlakeJordan
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Over the past 5 years, I’ve been in hospital for several days for surgery on three occasions (2 knee replacements and an inguinal hernia repair). I’m urinary incontinent and have worn a diaper 24/7 for many years. I highly recommend taking your own diapers with you to the hospital. Hospital diapers are not as good as the high-capacity diapers that I use on a regular basis (BetterDry and ConfiDry 24/). I also recommend that you change your own diaper whenever you are able to do so. I’ve become an expert at changing my own diapers; and the hospital personnel who have done it for me simply do not do as good a job as I do for myself.
Thank you! I’ve never been great at changing myself, cerebral palsy leaving me with one good hand. I do appreciate the heads up that if others change me to expect a subpar result.
This will be the first time I’ve been incontinent going to the hospital any tips to ensure I can use my own diapers and also not be cathed. Been there done that hate that. Lol.
Thanks again!. -
First off, having worked as both a paramedic and in the ER, I can tell you that we've seen diapers so it's not a problem.
Hospitals are all over the place on policy once you are admitted. These days, catheters are very much discouraged unless there's some strong reason for them (urinary blockage, etc...). Some hospitals have no problem dealing with diapered patients. Some, in a misguided attempt to preserve patient "dignity" are very opposed to them. Hospital diapers are almost always the stock institutional things (McKesson or Cardinal). If you have your own, I'd certainly bring them. I've seen patients do that.
The best bet is to inform your assigned nurse and/or doctors of what you need and prefer once out of the ER.
Thank you! That is very helpful. I do have my own supplies. What I’m thinking is to take a few packs of them with me and leave them in the car. In a go bag have enough for a couple of days along with medication (I know not typical but last time I went to ER it took 48 hours to get my meds in and my mom had to go to my home to pick them up in the meanwhile).
Thanks again, I really appreciate it! -
Hi All,
I’m getting ready to go to the ER today and am currently needing diapers due to urinary incontinence, part of the underlying condition that requires me to go to the ER in the first place.
I’m not sure how long I will be inpatient for and though I expect several days at the very least.
Can anyone provide insight as to what I should expect to happen when I arrive in a diaper, if I will be in diapers or cathed for the duration of my stay and if I should bring my own supply, and if so how many? I’m not sure if they will even allow me to use my own or if they will require me to use the standard hospital supply diapers.
I appreciate the help!
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Thanks Mahlee!
Thank you for your support, and I am glad (if not surprised) this thread has been helpful to you and so many others after all this time.
Also, it's not petty to appreciate a documented journey such as this.
If there is anything that I want to convey it is to say the need, want and desire for incontinence is as real as any other type of body and identity dysphoria. The toll that such dissonance creates is also very real. I want to say again that the dysphoria that being continent causes for me is just as important and impactful on my health and wellbeing as my gender dysphoria and various health conditions.
If I could give you the takeaway that I've learned is this.
Yes, its real, it hurts, it matters. My suffering and issues though perhaps not common, well documented and well understood affects me no less than the challenges of 'recognized disorders, conditions and dysphorias'. The want and need to align and correct your body to more closely match your identity does not make you crazy, stupid, weird, or sick. We all have the basic human right to be comfortable in our own skin. The journey and reasons are irrelevant in this regard, as is what is currently considered fact by society. You have the right to live for you, and you are justified in doing what you need to in order to live a happy and full life.
One of the biggest surprises to me over the past few years was that experts don't know everything and far too often their ego gets in the way of their willingness and ability to learn. Too many times I've run across "if I haven't heard of it, and can't find documentation and research than it doesn't exist".
I actually went through over 30 specialists before getting the correct diagnosis. I've had neurologists tell me that what I was experiencing could not be real, and it was a "physical manifestation of severe depression". I've had doctors rule out the brain with absolute certainty that my issues were not neurological.
Society and doctors forget that modern medicine is really in its infancy and that the journey of medicine, yes even modern medicine is marked by "facts and proven treatments" that in historical context is viewed as an atrocity, inhumane and simply just wrong.
So don't undercut yourself and what you feel and need.
Yes, it's real, it hurts, it hard, and it matters!
-Brooke- AKA Blake
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Hey everyone!
Been... just a little while since I've posted.
I disappeared a few years ago due to a misdiagnosed rare form of epilepsy. It started as extreme vertigo and the inability to talk or remember/follow even a simple sitcom. Needless to say it took two years and an average of 30 doctor appointments a month for about 18 months to get the diagnosis (As of now I am still patient zero).
After we got the seizures under control I was still left with some additional scarring to my brain and long term mental and physical issues. I am on my way to be better health, and am finally seeing some steady improvements.
Much of what I have been dealing with is chronic pain, concentration, and nerve damage to my eyes- which has made it near impossible to sit in front of a computer for more than a few minutes up until the past couple of months.
I prolly won't be on this forum much in the coming months, but wanted to say hi, and to let everyone know I am still alive and getting better.
Now, I know you are wanting to know what my current status is with the incontinence as well as the guide.
The guide never really got started unfortunatley. Mahleedl and I were just starting to work on things when literally overnight I went from functional to non functional.
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Thanks everyone. Really helpful. Exactly what I needed to know! Now to get that daytime craziness under control :whistling
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I have a sleep study in a couple weeks actually. I've had nocturnal neurosis for a couple years now. (On this forum better to differentiate between controlled and uncontrollable bed wetting). In any case any issues with letting staff know about preparation or any tips?
Thx!
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Elfking. You are again grouping every a Abdl into a fetishist category. This is simply not the case, infantilism has many shades of grey ranging from a purely sequel drive to purely emotional to the point of being intertwined with one's identity of self.
Your agreement of "keep it in the closet" can be applied to any idea or group that is not well tolerated and thus leads back to "at what point is anything worth fighting for, and does any cause matter. The universe is just going to die in the end"
At the spectrum of which infantilism manifists itself as an identity issue one cannot simply turn it off.
If at this moment in time I wanted to go and have surgery to become in continent, actually bringing it up as a conversation with my doctor, even after undergoing a three year trial full time. It simply would not happen. Best case I would get laughed out, worst case institutionalized.
When I was 13 and told my parents about my interest in diapers I ended up in the office of the top child psychiatrist in Arizona within a weeks time trying to be cured. This went on for years, leading to depression and multiple dioxide attempts. Not so much out of the lack of being able to wear but simply of being asked every day to lose a part of who I was. There is no cure for infantilism.
Oddly enough years later coming out as transgender to my entire family. Nothing. Total support.
A few years later coming out that I was asexual still not a big deal.
Within a year I could have gender reasssignment surgery, someone I have talked openly with several therapists in the past and am still considering.
I don't get weird looks from friends and family, and those I love as I hsve never dated.
Though the fact that infantilism, and the desire to incontinent us part of my identity, something I did not choose, tried to ignore, tried the counseling cure. (presented at the age of four after long term molestation in preschool- which I had counseling for at that point in my life throughout my jeans etc.)
Would I like the awareness on a professional level. Yes. Would I like the option of choice to do what I feel I need to do to make my body match my sense of self. Yes.
No one here is talking about matches in a onesie and pacies. What we are talking is education and awareness, as well as the freedom to live the life we want to live, and do with our bodies what we want. To be able to have a rational conversation with medical professionals and mental health providers without fear of loss of job or literally of being institutionalized.
None of that takes away from any movement.
I am firmly in the lgbt circle. I live everyday wanting my physical appearance to match who I am on the inside. Of side stepping questions of why I'm not married or dating. Of trying to get the love of my life to understand I have no sexual interest in her and why.
I also live everyday of my life wishing my body matched how I see myself on the inside, the need to be incontinent is just that a need I've accepted it, moved passed the traumatic events however the damage is done.
I don't tell this for pity but only to show that as someone deeply intriched in both worlds that there are far less "rights" as you would say and a far greater chance of misunderstanding and persecution when only discussing with medical professionals, let alone friends and family.
More knowledge and awareness and the realization that there is no "one box fits all, unless there is a unique box made for each person who has and ever will ever live" can only help the tolerance of everyone who has deviant (deviation from the norm) issues/dedires/afflictions.) despite not imposing any risk on society.
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Okay. First consider the Black aand white fallacy.
In this case more rights specifically more equal rights does not equate to a less rights for existing causes (LGBT in this case).
Just as there are movements for equality for women, race, equal employment opportunities, gender rights there can also be movements of awareness and/or "empowerment ".
Well you can draw the line at "this doesn't matter as a cause". At what point does know cause matter, and literally nothing in life matter?
I would say the biggest thing that I haven't seen brought up here is that both of these issues/causes have to deal with somethingthat is entangled into the identity of self. because of this, and because of the lack of understanding and acceptance and society as a whole, an individual is unable to express themselves as who they truly are without fear of persecution. These issues whether they are the identity of one's gender, or how they see themselves inside both require a need to match what one feels and sees to the physical representation of oneself. Someone who has paraphilic infantilism Will continue to have a drive towards those desires and that need to match what they feel to their external bodies whether or not they have the resources or freedoms to Express themselves without fear of persecution.
The same can be said for someone who has gender or sexual identity issues. If one feels like they should've been born as another sex/gender they will continue to feel that way again even if they do not have the resources or freedom to express and a batch what they filmed inside their physical bodies.
Lastly if someone is attracted to a specific, or non-specific gender and/or sex, or even none at all that too will manifest itself whether or not they have the freedom to reflect physically and outwardly and social interactions without persecution or fear thereof.
I would say based on various research that the majority of individuals who presents with paraphilic infantilism Will never have the choice to just give it up. You go further I would say that those manifestations the present as a physical need, that is for instance incontinence desires wood in this day and age be persecuted even by medical professionals by trying to match what they feel on the inside and haoles them selves on the inside to their own physical bodies. The problem does not come with the exhibitionists, it comes when somebody, anybody cannot live out their lives using discretion for fear of humiliation, persecution, or severe lack of opportunity due to an identity issue that can either be chosen, nor cured.
I will again and end with to try and remember the more rights for more people does not equate to less rights for the individuals who already have them. This has been seen time and again in the fight for equality in the workplace, and positions of power for both women and men.
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Hey Sci. Just remember to think of systems of managing incontinence. I mean that you don't have to wear a huge diaper 24/7.
Think of a wide variety to fit the situation. Whether it's a good pull up while getting ready for work. A Cunningham clam w a support while exercising (or an emergency of running out the door).
You can get different weights of diapers. Heck even go with afex system (external cath brief setup) for the events mentioned above.
If your doing incontinence for life. Time to make it work work for all parts of that life. Not just the fantasy aspect of your abdl side.
No shame in that.
Good luck!
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Agreed on fitting here, as well as tapes. Biggest problem I find is the tape placement and stick factor. Faaar too close for the amount of material on the wings. If they are going to put them that close. They need a 3rd tape.
I end up using scotch tear by hand packaging tape to create a bottom tape. Otherwise I can never get the leg gatherings tight enough. (Even then I still have to pull the front wing material up and back to get all extra material from the leg gathering) this method is the only way I've found to prevent leaks that would occur before whicking can occur. Seems like this run really requires absolutely no space I'm the crotch around thighs in order to prevent leaks (in my case)
I do wish I could find a quieter alternative to the tear by hand tape. (For one hand purposes). Makes changing in public.... Obvious.
In the end I wish they had come out with this line side by side their old. So much less frustration. New and improved is not always better. Things can be over engineered to the point of unusable.
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Bella's go past medium. Same sizing as bambinos other lines. (med-xl+), when available and limited to weird Bella sizing.
Have a case of large Bella's in my closet as we speak.
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An availability heuristic is a mental shortcut that relies on immediate examples that come to mind. When you are trying to make a decision, a number of related events or situations might immediately spring to the forefront of your thoughts. As a result, you might judge that those events are more frequent and possible than others. You give greater credence to this information and tend to overestimate the probability and likelihood of similar things happening in the future.
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Remember that we all see the world through a lens- a filter. We are also more likely to jump to conclusions if we can think of an example in our past, or in recent past, or even more so that something has occurred several times. In reality the odds are no different that it could just as easily be for medical, cosplay, a prank joke, a bet, curiosity, or various other things. Without further info or cause/prompt to look deeper I would try to remember that our own biases having these interests are going to point to extreme alertness, hope to share something we have hidden (as we have memories of being that age and doing things such as that- wanting to reach out). Just member you have both your bias filter and the fallacy (which I can't remember the name of off hand) working against you here).. I think awareness is going to be your greatest strength moving forward.
Best of luck!
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Remember that bedwetting is NOT about control, muscle strength, etc. it is simply about creating a pattern while sleeping.
That's the most difficult part is creating that new pattern after holding it for so many years.
I myself have a bladder that can hold upwards of 64 oz or more without hurting. Creating a pattern during sleep that it's both okay as well as normal to wet either in a diaper and/or (or not) in normal cloth in is the most difficult aspect.
For those looking for alarms- check out an option like an "up band" (which can also be good to track sleep during this time).. You can set an alarm every few hours to wake you in light sleep. It will vibrate your wrist band until you turn it off. Can help create that pattern.
(Also good if you sleep with anyone else)
In either case. Once you create a pattern. Have the comfort level, start moving the times from 30 min. To 45 min. To 1 hour.
Eventually you'll wet without waking. Make sure to have a safe environment so your not working against your mind. (Protected bed)
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Already you can see "why am I seeing this ad? " on many sites. If you click on it- you will find that Facebook is tracking you not only on their site- but across the net. We all live in our own little "bubble" that the internet caters to us. Google gives you customized results, even if your not logged in, using a private session, based on your IP address and browser and OS. This filter bubble is near impossible to get out of.
Most don't realize that users of Facebook ARE the product. Nor the other way around. Every bit of info you put in gets put into an ever refined data mining system that is sold to advertising companies to target ads to you and groups of people with similar interests and habits like you. The days are long gone when 18-30 males/females were good enough to target a population. (Hence recent failures of tv shows and movies of 3-4 years- things that were supposed to be sure things and also surprises. As well as things blatantly marketed to the wrong demographics.)
Some amazing shows, and products are out there and fail because they never reach their proper market.
It's also said that if Facebook closed it's doors for business in 2013 it could sell off all the info to advertisement agencies and would be worth at least 5x as much as it was worth then.
Advertisers absolutely love targeted calculated markets that work. Facebook exists solely for that market. It's "users/product" just don't realize it.
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I do wonder though. With how fast internet tracking and targeted ads are- if we ever got the taboos out into the open, if anything and everything could be targeted to the right market. Instead of mass broadcasts of commercials to millions. You could opt for a free netflix subscription. If you tied it in with your Facebook account. The adverts would be 30 seconds at the beginning and end of show. (Giving you your entire shoe at once). And giving targeted advertisement opportunities for companies and markets that are much more niche.
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A lot of diapers hold more than 2 quarts. (Over 64 oz).. Add in a booster- or two, and your at 128 or more ounces. Id say if your still worried double up, and lay down a liner and sleep soundly.
Having drank over a gallon and then slept for over 15 hours- getting another 64 oz. In when waking up. Without changing. This works just fine.
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I just don't see the need for acceptancefor ageplay outside of people's private lives, I guess.
I remember when the internet was still new, (early 2000s). I came out as a teen dl to my parents. Within 3 weeks I was sitting in front of a child psychiatrist- the head of the children's psych hospital in a large city.
Subsequently- within that very first session the psychiatrist- who was supposed to be the best in the state failed to ask how long I had these desires, whether the were sexual in nature, where/when they originated from and instead tried to cure me. He also put the belief that paraphiliac infantilism could indeed be cured (which even research at the time showed to be false) into my parents minds- a MD and PT- who accepted it without question.
The quest to "cure" me continued for several years and onto several other shrinks, all at the peak of the career and the top of their fields.
This eventually led to a 3 year deep suicidal depressive state and a constant struggle with my parents for acceptance.
(For the record the infantilism desires occurred after a long period of molestation at my pre-school, age 3 and have never been sexual. I myself am asexual)
The past doctor even went as far as to suggest that I be arrested in the middle of the night, shipped off to Australia with a group of other problem teen boys and made to survive in the wilderness. (I have a history of extreme migraines at this point, seizures, and cerebral palsy since birth). Thankfully my parents kindly declined the fully paid expense vacation, and fired the doctor (head of Phoenix childrens hospital psych department)
The reason for this story is to show that those that are unwilling or unknowing- to research, to do the work to enlighten themselves can and will do harm to those who need their help.
It was not a matter of an unaware small time doctor in the 80s in a small town. But the best of the best in child psychiatry between 2000-2007. Not that long ago.
What you and I consider "common knowledge, and common tools" just aren't, there is no such thing, until a general awareness of diversity is spread to all of humanity, not just the United States (what we think of as "our problem"a our people) and other developed nations but the world as a whole. Until we start seeing each person as unique individuals, and not as a cardboard cutout that needs to for between societal norms. No one will free, we will all have some sort of stigma, some shame, and the only free speech we will ever have without persecution is not even in our bedrooms, not even in our own heads, but in the places between dreams.
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My question would be WHY.
Why is there a need for people in a bizarre, taboo, sexual fetish to be so public? It's something that needs to be dissussed discreetly, and displayed privately- behind closed doors and in the bedroom.
That is the problem. Right there. Humans as a species are bizarre, taboo, sexually and fetish driven creatures.
If the conversations were taken out of the bedroom and onto the streets people would start to realize that all these fantasies, feelings, desires, fetishes, taboos etc. while not "normal" are by no means bizarre, and What the media, religion and society as a whole would like us to believe there is no "one box fits all". There is no normal. Unless there are as many boxes in as many sizes and shapes are there are people that have ever and will ever exist. What I normal today was not 100 years ago, what is taboo today (divorce for example). Was not in the 50s. Only when we as species step into the light, and take those conversations from the darkness with us into the light will we realize just how diverse, how beautiful, and how abnormal normal really is.
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I think this has been posted in the "diapers in the news" section. But is the closest thing I have seen.
I guess we are all trend setters here- on the bleeding edge of fashion.
Now. If only society would get over fashion vs function when it comes to personal care.
/facepalm
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I would also love an in depth review of the Bella's comparison of the originals vs the fluke batch vs. the 2.0. In both fit, bulk, absorption etc
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I would use Ubuntu but none of my games work well! I'll stick to my windows 7!
For those of you wanting to use Linux for gaming and encountering frustrations. Below is a short guide from a Linux pro friend that uses Linux for all her gaming. It describes an overview of "path of least resistance" to get stuff up and running without tons of tinkering- ala noob friendly.
Proceed at your own risk.
The best bet for games (of any sort) is probably linux mint (the mainline edition, NOT debian lol) it comes with nonfree codecs installed and all that jazz. the native steam linux client will run on it as well. You'll of course want to make sure to install proprietary vid drivers. If your not using steam, wine is a good option, as once setup should work well for most any game. Any games your having issues with wine has a wiki w/ compatibility issues, settings etc per game.
With mint, make sure the non-free driver is installed (mint includes an easy gui for selecting your vid driver), grab wine, grab 'winetricks,' install your games (winetricks is sort of like a tweak package that will install directx and crap for you) see wine compatibility wiki for tips and directions.
Also remember google is your friend with Linux. Any issue you run into has most likely been documented (and solved) by someone else.
Notes- if you choose to try this- READ THIS
READ the release notes for whatever distro ver. if you decide to install a distro.
In the installer, "Replace OS with Linux Mint" means erase the entire drive If another operating system is present on the disk, the second option suggested by the installer is to "replace the OS with Linux Mint". This option doesn't just wipe the partition used by the mentioned OS, but the entire drive and all its partitions.
if wiping the entire drive is an issue, you should be able to manually choose partitions with other options
Just the name of that one is misleading, to say the least
DISCLAIMER: I'm not an expert when it comes to Linux and games, but a close friend of mine is- asked for a direction to point anyone that a noob to Linux to get their games up and running through path of least resistance. Pretty much all of the above was copy/paste.
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May have to inquire about size of mattress. http://www.bedwettingabdl.com/CRIB.html
Looking for discreet organizational furniture for supplies
in Incontinence - Medical
Posted
I had a rapid and sudden onset of urinary incontinence this past mont. I know the cause, dysautonomia/autonomic dysfunction flareup. The duration is unpredictable but I can count on this being semi permanent. This is for both day and night in continence.
I am currently in a small one bedroom condo that I own and have a small linen closet I can convert if n needed. I am looking for furniture for supplies that can later double as standard storage.
Due to other disabilities and rapidly deteriorating health I need to take into account accessibility to help with compliance. I currently have use of one hand, and do not tolerate bending over, excretion etc.
I am a heavy wetter due to the need for high levels of way intake. My eyes tend to dart around which requires that items not be too close, have a clear separation, and not require moving stuff around in order to locate, access, and assess supply quantity.
My goL is goal is to have two stations, one bedside and one main area. This is in part due to limited mobility.
I currently use onesies plastic pants, terry lined plastic pants, ointments , powder, creams/lotions, wipes, disposal bags, diaper doublers, and a few odor eliminating, washable waterproof pads, tans mattress protects protecters, and of course diapers, currently two different weighted tan style and - pull up style.
My goals are easy access, visibility, odor control, visibility, quick access/restocking (from a main storage closet) discreet disposal, keeping everything including soiled linens close together It has to be extremely easy to access, with little bending over, ease of restocking, golf about a week’s worth in main area linen closet and 2 days by bedside. Easy cleanup and disinfecting, easy/discreet disposal for caregivers that are assisting.
My stamina, dexterity, and stability are severely compromised due to extreme dizziness and low blood pressure. Restocking will be done by caregivers so not worried by stamina for that.
Bedside I have the area Note: Dictated via voice recognition software due to vision problems a large bedside table Thank You work with.
Any suggestions are greatly appreciated. This linen part will be hidden behind a door so exposed storage is acceptable, however the bedside implementation to be much more discreet.
Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.
Thanks!