snazzy

This is a really fun concept! I like it a lot. I'd be really interested in seeing more like this!

Oh. My. GOD. I loved this story so much! I really love the concept and how fun it is! I think it's a fantastic idea of have super heroes who power up with how full their diapers get. It's really silly but it totally works here. I would happily read more from this setting!

I really like this series! I'm really curious to see how it develops! Keep up the good work. Since people seem to be adjusting to strollers in schools, I wonder if baby walkers might be next!

Hi all! I'm Snazzy. I'm a long-time lurker on the story forums. I recently wrote a story that I posted onto my FurAffinity page. I figured that I would share it here in case anyone was interested. I have also attached the PDF of the story since I know this is kind of long (67 pages on Google Docs). The Retrain System By: Snazzy It was that idle chatter between gossip. Casual conversation between friends about this and that. Carmella could check out a little bit when the topics retread old ground or didn’t involve her. But there was always something new and thoughtful. Or at least something fun to hear. Something to pique interest. She sipped her latte. It was too sweet. But it wasn’t worth harassing the barista about it. She liked to think that she only pulled out the “Karen” card when it actually mattered. The book club was nominally about books, but in reality was more of an excuse to have a girl’s afternoon. Yes she read the books. Or tried, anyway. Who has time to read a 450-page novel? Carmella tried her best to split the time between her work and her kids and her husband and her own attempt at a novel, but… Thinking too hard about how one spends their finite time on the planet never ends well. And that’s too much for a cafe conversation. “And what about Jake? Noah mentioned he had some trouble with…” That’s it. That’s the good stuff. Carmella got out of her own world, her wolf ears twitching. Having friends with kids around your own kids’ age had its benefits. Kamille, the fox of the group (both literally and physically), always seemed to be armed with the most interesting bits to chew on. “Oh well, it’s a little embarrassing. He was butting heads with one of the players on the soccer team and things got… It’s a bit sore. Jake’s a good boy but he’s at that age where he likes to make decisions without thinking. He’s suspended for the week.” Saundra, a middle-aged raven, rubbed her temples. There was more than enough empathy from the group. Every mother here knew the struggles. This was different from hot gossip; this was relatable gossip. The kind where bonds are formed rather than broken. “You know, I get it.” Daria, the bear who looked far too good for her age, chimed in first. “I remember back when I played volleyball there was this girl who just wouldn’t shut up about my serve. I wanted to serve it straight into the back of her head some games. There’s so much stress when you grow up. I can’t imagine all that time spent online helps with it.” ~STRESS~ That word… Carmella focused. Why does that word have so much meaning? Something about it resonates with her… “You blame everything on the internet, Daria.” “Well I’m just saying it can’t be good for you to grow up with-” “You’re literally scrolling through ChikChok right now!” That got an unexpected laugh out of Carmella, which then bled to the rest of the group. It’s nice when the mood is able to shift like that. The group conversation continued on discussing the difficulty of modern child-rearing. Jake’s unexpected outburst had Carmella a little introspective. Her own son, Lucas, was in his grade. They were both about to graduate middle school. Carmella thought she had done a decent job raising him. They were decently close. He had decent grades. He was even in a few advanced classes and was doing decently! But Daria was right about the stress of growing up. When she talked to Lucas it felt like he was being pulled in a million different directions. Once Carmella felt like she had a finger on the pulse of her child’s life, but now Lucas seemed so busy all the time. The homework, the school politics, the puberty, the clubs, the hobbies, the… everything. It was all so much. Maybe that was normal, but it didn’t feel good to see her child barraged and bothered. It was clear that he was frequently stressed and his stress filtered their relationship. There had been shouting matches where Lucas and his father, Ron, had just… Well, Saundra put it best: they butted heads. As a parent, Carmella felt like she was letting Lucas down by allowing that stress to get to him. It was clear that his mood was in constant flux. It used to be so much simpler. Carmella’s thoughts were interrupted by Kamille’s voice. “You know my sister tried out something odd recently.” The conversation had clearly taken a left-turn while Carmella was again thinking a little too deeply. “I’m curious if any of you have heard of it. My niece was part of a study that was recently published. My sister allowed her daughter to be put back into uh… diapers as part of it. Like the whole way. What? Don’t give me that look, I told you it was odd!” “Are you saying your niece was… what, just wearing diapers as part of a study?” “No, I mean, she was UNpotty trained. As in they followed some method that put her back into Pampers. It was part of some psychological study by the university.” “I have seen some posts about that,” Daria chimed in. “I thought it was a sex thing, but it’s been on some parenting blogs and a couple of family ChikChok accounts mentioned it. It’s supposed to be for stress-relief.” “I have a hard time believing that going back to diapers would somehow be less stressful,” Saundra concluded. “Well… Does it work?” Carmella felt the twinge of awkwardness as she realized this was her first actual contribution to the conversation in the last few minutes. “I mean, what did the study show? Hopefully it wasn’t all for nothing. That poor girl must be mortified.” “That’s what has me curious,” Kamille leaned in, setting her coffee on the table and eying the group. “According to the study, after the initial shock settled, every single participant saw an increase in test scores, socialization skills, and happiness indexes.” “Get the fuck out of here.” “Kamille is right. That’s what I read from the parenting sites. It’s some kind of counter-intuitive thing. Like, by removing a physical stressor from them, you allow their minds to cope with their environment, reducing their overall stress. I’m not sold on it,” Daria seemed smug in her ability to always know a little bit about everything thanks to being glued to her phone. ~STRESS~ There was that word again. Carmella was thoroughly bought into the conversation. “I wasn’t sold on it either until we had them over for a cookout over Memorial Day. That girl was like a changed person. She was so polite and well-spoken and seemed to have so much energy. I’ve known her all her life and she could be a real handful. It was wild. She was in three AP courses as a sophomore because of how improved her grades were last year. The girl had to repeat 6th grade and suddenly she’s interested in school!” “Do you think they could have replaced her with a robot? Or a clone? Did you ask to see her belly button?” Saundra gave a cheeky grin over to Daria. Some sort of inside joke Carmella wasn’t privy to, apparently. “Maybe! Who knows! Gods, it was so bizarre seeing her with a diaperbag. I almost walked in on her changing herself in the bathroom.” Kamille seemed bewildered, an emotion quite unlike her. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with all of the teen-sized diapers I’ve seen at the store, would it?” The group turned to Carmella. “I mean, I just noticed that the Farris Peeter had some actual diapers that look like they’re for older kids when I was buying groceries the other day. Maybe this is some kind of legitimate marketing push.” “Goodness. Well good luck to them, I suppose. Noah seemed pretty shaken when he found out his cousin was back in diapers. I can’t imagine many kids actually want something like that to happen to them.” “My Jakey would absolutely lose it if I tried that with him. How on earth are you supposed to tell your kids you’re just going to unpotty train them?” “I don’t think you do,” Daria had been looking at her phone and seemed to have found something. She shared the screen with the group. “Look, this is the page that was linked on the Pinstagram post. It’s some kind of auditory thing. The program is called ‘The Retrain System’. It’s like a tape that you listen to at first and then there’s steps after that. It’s a whole package.” Saundra cocked her head to the side as she looked at the, seemingly legitimate, webpage. Carmella saw her eyes scanning the screen, reading. The phone rotated around, revealing the site. It was an FAQ page about the process and based on the scroll-bar it seemed in-depth. Carmella spied one of the questions. How Invasive is the Process? The Retrain System has been specifically engineered to minimize obstruction in sleep schedule and daily activities among participants. The instruction course details tips and techniques to maximize the enjoyment and psychological well-being of participants. Participants will find the audio files relaxing and therapeutic. The reduction in stress has been shown[4][5][6] to outweigh any potential disruption caused by the physical elements of the system. The process is also easily reversible, allowing for participants to return to their base state upon removal of the environmental stressors. Studies[7][8] have found that- The page continued on but the phone was snatched away by Daria before Carmella could continue. ~STRESS~ So much emphasis on that word in that page… “Hey Kamille, didn’t you try something like this for smoking back in college?” Carmella was fascinated by this entire situation. “Ugh don’t remind me. I still get the stupid narrator voice stuck in my head like an earworm. ‘Place both feet firmly on the floor…’” The fox imitated the monotone voice from the file. “I mean, I don’t smoke cigarettes anymore, but I feel like that was different. You can’t out-willpower a fox!” “You certainly could if you needed your fix at a party…” Saundra side-eyed the fox with a smirk. “Oh hush, that was a totally different me. But yes, I did use something like this back in the day. I’m just flabbergasted that,” the fox lowered her voice, “diapers,” her voice returned to the normal volume, “are somehow the solution to teenage angst. I would be wholly against this entire thing if I hadn’t witnessed the results myself.” Carmella knew that Kamille was a reliable friend. She wouldn’t bring this sort of thing up with ulterior motives or without feeling strongly on the subject. It was clear that she was trying to get the room’s opinion before solidifying her own. “I know what you mean. It’s so odd, but the science seems to back it up.” Carmella pursed her lips in thought. “Maybe it’s worth considering. I mean, I know Lucas is doing alright but… he just seems so… stressed. Plus we’re going to have to start thinking about college soon. I want him to have the best possible chance he can have in high school. We all want that. I know you feel that way about Jake.” “Of course I do!” The raven put her winged hand against her chest. “It just feels a little extreme. What if I make his situation worse? What if… I don’t know, I can’t imagine the boys on the soccer team will respond well to it. I mean, goodness, can you imagine him running around on the field in a big diaper? Shaking his tail feathers?” The phone-obsessed bear had been glued to the screen, scrolling up and down, clicking on things as she found new links. “It says here that several diaper companies are expanding their lines for teens and young adults. Where was it… oh uh… active-flex? Active-fit?” Daria was squinting at the screen. “I can’t see, it’s in the background of this announcement photo. I guess they thought of that problem before you did, Saundra.” “How convenient.” “Sorry to bring all this weird stuff up, everyone.” Kamille raised her hands, signaling for the halt of the conversation. “I promise I’m not trying to pull you all into another referral marketing scheme. I still have too many vials of essential oils at my house for my comfort.” “I have NO idea how you talked me into that. You are such a saleswoman, Kamille!” “I thought for sure that it would take off. I mean I refer my friends and then you refer your friends and… anyways! Did you all happen to read the book this week? I finished chapter 35 two nights ago and WOW did it pick up!” Carmella appreciated the change in direction. It was clear that this wasn’t a cut-and-dry development and that the group wasn’t of a strong consensus. Something about this whole affair really resonated with her, however. Her lingering worries and concerns seemed perfectly solved by this Retrain System. And unlike Kamille’s pyramid scheme there was actual scientific evidence backing the whole thing up. Surely it couldn’t be that simple? Just put your kid back in diapers and all their problems go away? She would have to talk with Ron. -- Lucas exhaled as he disembarked from the bus and made his way to his house. He tugged on his shoulder straps and shifted the contents of his bookbag. It had been his last day of eighth grade. The last day of middle school. He should have been thrilled about it, but he felt like he was lucky to be graduating at all. The last few weeks had exposed a major issue: despite his claims otherwise, he had been extremely close to flunking his science class. When his teacher contacted his parents directly to alert them, his dad flipped out and made him redo all the tardy homework assignments. It wasn’t like he was intentionally trying to fail, it just felt like he was barely keeping his head above water with all of the homework he had already! And that teacher was kind of a bitch, honestly. Like, was it standard protocol at all to call up parents directly? That had to be some kind of violation of privacy or something. It really wasn’t such a big deal: Lucas was able to get the homework done in time and it was no harm, no foul. He would have done it without the shouting match with his parents. Probably. You know what makes you really productive when you’re trying to remember the periodic table of elements? Having your fuming dad over your shoulder every five minutes. Wow! What a fantastic study method. Definitely not scarred for life from the stress of doing a year’s worth of homework in three days. So here he was, definitely going to high school next year, but JUST barely. His friend Jake had it worse, for sure. His suspension a few weeks ago had put him way behind and it had really messed up the vibes in the friend group. At least all that garbage was behind them and they could spend the summer focusing on doing absolutely nothing. Lucas noticed that both his parents’ cars were in the driveway when he made it home. That’s odd. Normally Lucas was the first to arrive home since both his parents had jobs. Of course, his little brother prevented him from having the alone-time that he craved. But at the very least he could avoid conflicts with Mom and Dad for a couple of hours. Which seemed like they were becoming more frequent. “Lucas, wait up!” The gray wolf teen rolled his eyes as he heard his little brother Martin call out to him. He put his hands on his hips and turned in place. The little guy was running from his bus stop and boy he really just chose to wear all that Pikachu bling, huh? Pikachu shirt, Pikachu pants, Pikachu shoes, a Pikachu hat, and a Pikachu backpack. Lucas was no stranger to video games but he liked to think that he was at least minimally tactful in how he dressed himself. Martin, on the other hand, seemed determined to share his obsession with the world. It was almost, ALMOST endearing. “Wait up? I’m not going anywhere. We live together, lightning-butt.” “Don’t call me lightning-butt!” The little wolf screeched to a halt in the middle of the sidewalk. “Mom said it’s not nice to call me names!” “Your pants literally have a lightning bolt symbol on them. I can’t help that!” The two boys completed the rest of the journey together. Lucas didn’t mind being an older brother. But it just isn’t acceptable to give your little bro an easy time when they’re being a turbo dork. And what could possibly be more dorky than that PokeManiac outfit? The door was unlocked. Not too unusual if parents are home. What was a little unusual was that they weren’t out around the house. If Mom came home early she liked cooking dinner. Dad had a model-painting station that he liked to spend his time at. Yet neither Mom nor Dad were there. Actually, their bedroom door was closed. Lucas’ tail lowered and squinted as he set his bookbag by the front door. “Hey Martin, go grab me a water from the fridge.” “Why can’t you do it?” “Just go before I like vine whip you or whatever.” The teen wolf was overwhelmed with curiosity. Maybe Mom and Dad came home to have sex? No, that can’t be right. Lucas had caught them only once, but he was pretty sure they waited until after bedtime to do that kind of stuff. They weren’t getting a divorce were they? Like, why else would you want to talk with your spouse in the early afternoon? He quietly made his way to the bedroom. “-sure about this?” “The guidebook says it’s fully reversible if we’re unhappy with how it turns out.” “A month ago and I would have fought you on this, but I think you’re right. It’s so much-” “Here’s your water, catch!” Lucas had almost no time to react to the water bottle hurling at his face. Yet, if there was one thing a canine was good at, it was playing catch. With impressive speed the teen lifted his paw and intercepted the projectile. It felt pretty cool, which was outwardly obvious by his involuntary tail-wagging. When Lucas regained his focus, he realized that the conversation had quieted significantly. His cover had clearly been blown. Curiosity made way for concern. As mature as Lucas liked to style himself (he WAS about to be a high schooler, after all), he still had that childlike concern when something unknown was happening with his family. “Mom? Dad?” He put himself sideways and leaned, as if facing the door was too direct. “Oh! Just a moment sweetie, your father and I were discussing…” Muttering sounds, totally normal muttering sounds. “The mortgage!” “...is the mortgage ok?” “Yes! Better than ever! Uh, we’ll be out in a moment, just have to wrap up this paperwork.” A reversible… mortgage? Was that like that thing that happened to grandma’s house? Dad seemed pretty upset about it when he heard whatever that actually was was actually happening. So why would they want something like that? Something wasn’t adding up, but it was clear that Lucas wasn’t going to learn anything standing at the doorway. He could ask about it over dinner. -- “So you’re sure you don’t have anything outstanding that would keep you from passing?” Dad said between bites of pizza. This would normally be a celebratory pizza dinner for making it through another school year, but clearly Dad was skeptical after the science class mix-up. Previously, this kind of dinner would be in front of the TV while watching a movie or a show, but in the interest of “family bonding” Mom had declared that no screens were to be viewed while eating dinner. It led to a lot of awkward silence during dinner. “Yes Dad. I promise. You can call up Mrs. Macintosh again if you want her to tell you.” Lucas still wasn’t happy that she called his parents directly. “Ok. You cut it really close this year, kiddo. You’re headed to high school. That’s a big step up. A lot of your teachers won’t accept that kind of late work. They’re expecting you to stay on top of things and be responsible.” Lucas ate his pizza in silence. This wasn’t the first “oh things will be different in high school” speech he’d had lately. “Your mother and I… we just want what is best for you. We want you to be happy and not have so many… problems.” “Ron, let's talk about that after dinner. So, Martin, how was your last day? Any surprises?” “Yeah! We had a big pizza party and then watched a bunch of ChikChok videos that Mrs. Franklin pulled up. Mom, what does ‘we are running out the clock’ mean?” -- Lucas was on his way to his room when he heard his Dad behind him. “Hey, champ, let’s have a quick talk.” He turned, attempting to give his most neutral expression possible. His parents were quickly getting annoying with their constant lecturing and lesson-making. But it was better to endure them now and have a peaceful summer vacation. “C’mon, in your room.” Lucas ascended the stairs and opened the door. His room was not quite yet how he wanted it to be. It was still in that transitory phase between a child’s room and a proper teen’s room. He had slowly accumulated some items of interest. Posters for bands and games he liked. A TV with a Ycube Series R. A desk with a refurbished laptop. His twin bed was in generic blue sheets. Two years prior and it would have probably had something childish like Double Week on it. There was also the accumulation of laundry on the floor. However, his dresser was the same one that he had as a kid, with primary color knobs against the white paint scheme, giving it an immature tone. His old toy chest was under the windowsill, with several Lego sets stacked on top (that he still enjoyed from time to time). Small items that had been added to the room from past years still lingered, like his old metal little league baseball bat and glove that was no longer his size, or some of the art he had made in elementary school. It was a room that showed a young wolf with one foot in the mature future and one foot in the immature past. There was also a cardboard box on top of the bed, which had not been there previously. “Sweetie, we wanted to have a talk with you.” Lucas wasn’t expecting for his Mom to also be up here. But alright, fine, if they wanted to have another group talk, fine, lets get it over with. His Mom and Dad stepped in and closed the door behind them. His Mom sat at the foot of the bed and his Dad sat in his computer chair. Lucas joined his Mom on the bed. “We know this has been a tough time for you, these last few weeks. And we know that you worked very hard to make up those missing assignments. Your father and I are proud of you for doing that and you know that we love you very much. We want to make sure that when you go to high school, that things are a little bit easier for you.” “Easier?” Lucas cocked his head to the side, then looked from Mom to Dad. His Dad had a neutral expression, looking straight at him. It was difficult to read. “Yes, easier. We found a program that will help you to relax and unwind while you’re asleep. There have been a lot of… studies that show that this program is very effective in reducing stress in young adults.” “Oh. So… what, like meditation stuff? Is that what the box is for?” Lucas turned to the nondescript box with no markings on it. “Yes, exactly, that’s exactly right. It’s to help you maintain a better mental state and… There’s some other things that happen down the road that make it a whole experience. Like I said, it’s a full program. But it starts with something like nighttime meditation.” Lucas wasn’t against meditation. He had picked up a book on spirituality last year when the family took a mountain trip. It talked about that kind of thing. But it also talked about communicating with trees. And despite several attempts sitting at the base of trees, the young wolf never got that to work. Maybe being guided by a program could actually make something like that possible. Not the tree-talking stuff; the meditation. His father chimed in. “The whole point of this is for you to have fewer issues when you’re in high school. It’s… for your own good.” Huh. That certainly wasn’t ominous. Lucas quirked an eyebrow as he continued staring at the box. When parents say things like that, it’s normally a sign that something you’re not about to like is going to happen, he pondered. But if his parents seemed set on having him meditate while sleeping, that probably wasn’t the most painful experience in the world. “What is in the box?” “It’s a special white-noise emitter that helps you fall asleep quickly and stay asleep while the… uh… meditation system is running. It’s specially designed to be responsive to changes in the environment so you don’t get woken up. And you don’t need to fiddle with it like a stereo system. We’d like to set it up and get it working tonight, if you’re ok with it.” Both parents were looking expectantly at Lucas. It was a strange position to be in, and one that caused him to pause and reflect. His parents were proposing this thing that they clearly had spent money on, but they were waiting for his approval. Huh. Maybe they actually were respecting his autonomy after all. They weren’t forcing him into some agreement that he didn’t want. While Lucas wasn’t convinced this would be any different than his attempts at talking with trees, there wasn’t any harm in trying it! If it works, he gets a relaxing sleep. And if it doesn’t work, they return it back to Nile or whatever place they bought it from. “Alright. Sure! Let’s try it out.” -- Lucas laid in bed, taking in his surroundings. He had stayed up watching TV downstairs while his parents worked to install the new sound system for him. Apparently it wasn’t quite as out-of-the box as they were hoping. He heard a fair bit of discussion coming from the room and his parents stomping around in his territory. He’d helped Noah set up a speaker system for an old vinyl record player and it had been a lot more complicated than either of them initially expected. So maybe speakers just weren’t easy to get working in general. When the grand tour finally occurred it was somewhat underwhelming. Speakers in the four corners of the room pointed in the direction of the bed, plus some cylindrical device next to his bed that everything was plugged into. Lucas’ parents had wanted to get it under the bed, but it was just a tad too tall to fit. It wasn’t a huge deal. So long as he didn’t jump into bed backwards or something it would stay out of his way. The device was set to a timer. His Dad mentioned that there were some versions of the device that tracked whether you were in bed or not and shut off as soon as you got up. Maybe that was more immersive or something, but the system seemed fine as it was. And since they didn’t even know if this would be a permanent addition to his sleep routine, it didn’t make sense to splurge on the deluxe versions. As he was in bed, Lucas heard the speakers crackle to life, emitting a white noise. Thanks to the direction of the speakers, it was an astonishing experience. The white noise seemed to surround and envelop him. Like, it was different than just having a stereo on or headphones in. It was a three-dimensional sound that was difficult to describe. He could hear and feel subtle shifting of the white noise as it played around him. It was surprisingly entertaining. The dull static ebbed and flowed, like waves, crashing against him. There was a comfortable rhythm to the changing of the sounds. It felt safe and secure. A reliable, easy, sound that maintained his attention while not asking too much from him. It was really an incredible experience. He felt as if he was gently resting on a pool of water, his body shifting and drifting with the whims of the waves. A reassuring tranquility that varied just enough to keep him interested and invested in the sounds, but never strayed far from the simple, contemplative hum. Without any effort or resistance, he was asleep. And The Retrain System began. -- The first day of summer vacation was always the best. The stagnation of repeated free and lazy days had yet to set in. Daytime TV was a fun novelty rather than complete misery (although not that it mattered much, since streaming solved the problem of being stuck watching soap operas and weird talk shows). The pressures of homework and testing were behind and the anxiety of a new school year had yet to rear its head. As Lucas awoke and made his way to the bathroom to relieve himself, none of these thoughts were in his head. In fact, his mind was void of anything of note. Perhaps this was the mental freedom of waking up with absolutely nothing needed. Perhaps it was the meditation system his parents had installed actually doing its work. Perhaps it was the single-minded nature of the body declaring its needs to someone with a full bladder. No matter the reason, Lucas was unburdened by mental notions this morning. The teen wolf stood in front of the toilet and relieved himself. He relieved himself right into his boxers. The wolf's eyes shot open as he felt the heat blossoming into the crotch of his underwear, rivulets of warm pee dribbling onto the tile beneath him. He clinched his bladder shut and stemmed the tide, preventing this accident from growing. He had only been peeing for a few seconds but it was more time than he generally spent pissing himself. He cursed and examined the damage. The boxers didn’t do much to actually prevent streams of liquid from passing through them. The staining and wetness on his boxers came more from when the stream stopped and slowed and was allowed to run down his thighs. The light grey underwear was undeniably darkened at the crotch and clung to him with damp stickiness. What on earth had happened? Lucas sighed and shook his head, stripped from his stained clothes, and used them to mop up the liquid beneath him. It was a bizarre incident, but that’s all. This was no different than when you dribble after using the urinal. Just a temporary lapse in judgment following a good night’s rest. He threw the undies into the hamper and finished relieving himself as he intended. -- Lucas grabbed the milk from the fridge and started the assembly of his cereal. The key was to pour the milk INTO the bowl. Not a lot of people really understood that proper technique, but it made all the difference. He was the first one up, which was pretty surprising. Normally he was a late-sleeper on the weekends. It was pretty common for Martin to be down here playing one of the many, many, many pokemon games that he had access to. As much as it was frustrating to have him constantly up in his business, Lucas genuinely appreciated his little brother. And if that kid could figure out a way to monetize his love of those collectable creatures he’d be set for life… “How’d you sleep last night?” Lucas’ Dad was dressed in an old shirt from some bank fundraiser and gym-shorts, his hair still a muddled mess. The classic early lawn mowing outfit. His earbuds were in his paws, ready to begin jamming out to Big Spicy Capsicums. Dad was a textbook Pepper Man. “Pretty good! I kind of just passed out. I don’t know if the sleep system thing really helped or not.” Lucas finished pouring the milk and started devouring the cereal, leaving the carton on the countertop. “Well, hopefully it helps. Make sure you tell your mom and me how you’re feeling, ok? If it starts making you feel bad we can always get Nile to take it back.” He started walking towards the back door, placing his earbuds in. “Oh, milk goes in the fridge, bud. We talked about this.” The young wolf sighed out a “Yes Dad.” It’s such a victimless crime, like, the cows have the milk in them for how long? And that’s like room temperature, before it even gets pasteurized, which he learned from science class last year actually warms it up further… Grumble. Grumble grumble grumble. Door open, milk in, door shut. Grumble grumble. “Good man.” -- The rest of the day was basically perfect. Lucas played far more rounds of Summit Luminaries than he even wanted. Like the indulgence of playing a game so many times that he became sick of it somehow made it even better. It was probably what those Roman orgies were like. Just doing something pleasurable so many times that you get bored and disinterested, which then spurs you on because the taboo of becoming fatigued by things you crave feels so delicious. That is to say, having the time and freedom to completely waste a day on video games was the absolute best. He even got the chance to play some matches with his friends in his squad. “Any plans for the summer?” Noah, a fox and Lucas’ best friend, inquired. True to his nature he was always asking questions and snooping around. Lucas had previously heard his Mom get upset with Noah’s mom because she liked to gossip. Noah wasn’t quite so open with what he learned, which made him more like the group’s confidant. “I plan on doing literally nothing. Usually Mom and Dad do a beach trip, so that might happen. Uhhhh I’ll probably end up babysitting Martin. Dude dude dude behind you! NICE!” “Mom’s letting me do a soccer camp. No no no ahhhh dang it. I’m downed. But yeah like I was expecting Mom to have me on lockdown after I kicked Scott’s ass, but she’s been really chill.” “You did not ‘kick Scott’s ass,’” Noah chided. “You shoved each other and rolled around on the ground for a bit.” “No, no, I distinctly remember that he was crying afterwards because I beat the heck out of him.” “You were both crying!” Lucas chimed in and Noah laughed. Jake, a raven, clearly wasn’t happy with his side of the story being disputed. “Ok like, I don’t know why you guys are being shitty about this.” “It’s ok man, you run circles around Scott anyways. You shouldn’t waste your time on him.” Lucas was genuinely impressed with Jake’s talent, which was obvious even back when they used to play rec league soccer together. “Are you excited about the soccer camp? You’re trying out for the JV team right?” “That’s the plan! I don’t really know what to expect. Everyone makes it seem like high school is the big… ahhh damn it. Good try y’all. Yeah it’s like such a big deal to play high school sports. It’s exciting but… I hope this camp gets me an edge or something.” Lucas was about to speak up when he realized something. The conversation must have been so engaging or maybe he had been distracted by the game, but now that he was in the lobby loading a new match, he had to pee. Like he REALLY had to pee! “One sec, brb!” He heard talking on the other side of the headset but paid it absolutely no attention as he dashed over to the bathroom near his room. The door was closed and the sound of rushing water (just a great thing to hear when you have to pee) echoed from the other side. Shit. Martin must be in there. “Hey Martin, you almost done?” “Huh?” The water turned off and the younger wolf poked his head out. He was wearing a beanie with some fiery cat Pokemon that Lucas didn’t recognize. Lucas really hoped that Pokemon merch wasn’t coming out of his college fund. The teen wolf's hands were shoved involuntarily between his legs. “Are you almost done in the bathroom?” Lucas tried to ask as calmly as possible. “Y-Um…” Martin looked down just a little, noticing his brother’s legs contorting and his paws wedged into his crotch. He gave the biggest, toothiest, shit-eating grin back up to his brother. “Noooo, sorry, I was just washing my hands before I went-” Lucas bolted down the stairs, not even waiting for his brother to finish. He knew this game. Lucas knew that the door would shut and a series of unfortunate events would play out resulting in him never being able to use the bathroom. That little twerp. You do that to your little brother ONE TIME and suddenly the tables turn at the worst moment. It was almost, ALMOST something to be proud of him for doing. If it wasn’t happening to Lucas specifically, that was. The hallway bathroom was little brother-free and unobstructed by any other bizarre incidents, thankfully. The relief of emptying a full bladder can never be replicated through other means. It is an entirely unique experience resulting in a sublime mixture of relief and ache. The muscles themselves contract and pulse, yielding to the demands of the body. Their overinflated state gives them a sheer tension that upon release is almost too great. The body knows what must happen, and it must happen in a precisely controlled fashion. The endorphins flow through the body, rewarding the accomplishment of successful navigation of this hardship. It is like a runner’s high, if that high could come from flying too close to the sun with liquid intake. Lucas was too busy pissing to contemplate such things, but they were all still true. -- The next few days went by in a blur for Lucas. The nice thing about having a vacation was being able to do nothing, but the downside was that doing nothing causes time to fly by. The meditation system that had been installed was doing a great job at giving the teen some of the best sleep he’d ever experienced. It was actually a little bizarre that he was excited to go to bed thanks to the calming effects of the white noise. He wasn’t spending all day thinking about sleeping or anything weird like that. He just found himself yawning well-before midnight and made the responsible decision to head to bed rather than stay up. In return, he had been waking with the most fabulous restfulness. The catch, however, was that this restfulness came at the expense of his morning bladder. It was normal to wake up needing to use the restroom, but the intensity of the morning urge was notable. When he awoke, it was a mad dash to the toilet that resulted in some extremely close calls. The incident with his underwear at the start of vacation was enough to get him to take care before peeing. He would center himself and run through the checklist of things to do. He’d pull the seat up. Then pull down his boxers. Then aim carefully. Then go. He was adamant about not repeating that embarrassment from earlier. The daytime urgency was also a continued event. It seemed like he was constantly getting so absorbed by whatever task he was focusing on that he would have to sprint down the hall to barely make it in time. The strangest thing about all of this was that Lucas found himself unable to view this change as odd. Yes, he was going to the bathroom with an aching bladder and it always seemed to be resolved just barely in the knick of time. But he was still making it to the bathroom. Nothing bizarre about that. He was just getting wound up with his attention sighted on other things. That’s fine, it happened to everyone. At no point did he even begin to make any connection between the newly installed speaker system and his potty urgency. Why would those two things be related in any way? -- “Why are you staring at me like that?” Lucas noticed that his brother was giving him an odd look. They were next to each other in the booth of a local chain dining restaurant, Diamond Thursdays. It was pretty fantastic, at least to him and his brother. For some reason his parents always seemed reluctant to eat here. Lucas didn’t get it. They had great chicken tenders and mozzarella sticks. That was the complete food package. “You’re squirming in your seat. It looks like you’re potty dancing,” Martin said in between bites of appetizers. “Martin, don’t talk with your mouth full,” his mother admonished. “He’s right though. Do you have to use the restroom, Lucas?” Lucas was genuinely confused. He hadn’t noticed that he was shifting in his seat, moving back and forth, with his legs intertwined. It was like he completely glossed over the physical state of his body. But now that he was made aware of his condition it was plainly obvious that he really, really, REALLY had to pee! “Yes! Oh crap, yes. Martin, move please!” His brother was taken aback by the sudden urgency. He wasn’t expecting to have to move so soon and was just curious about why Lucas was moving around in his seat. But he complied and stepped out of the booth. The whole time being pressured by Lucas to “move move move move!” The teen wolf scrambled into the dining room and nearly connected with one of the waitresses, who had to make an emergency rotation to avoid having her tray of drinks upended. There was a shout from behind him as he located the restroom hallway. It was one of those situations where the interior decorator made the strange decision to mark the rooms with non-descriptive terms in an attempt to be cutesy. One sign was a fish. The other sign was a sandal. What the fuck was that supposed to indicate? Lucas picked the one his muscle memory led him to, hoping that he wasn’t about to awkwardly barge in on a bunch of ladies. Thankfully he picked correctly, as an empty bathroom with a row of urinals greeted him. He staggered over and let loose. It was such an extreme release of pressure that he was actually whimpering as the pee flowed out of him. He could feel the physical relief washing over him. A tangible warmth, spreading out from his groin and draining downwards. His eyes were closed as he shuddered and placed a hand against the wall, bracing for this monumental effort. It felt so, so, so ridiculously good to get it all out. It was like he was being rewarded with a matching sensation of glow on the outside to match the pleasure of allowing his bladder to finally empty. Lucas was panting. That felt incredible. It was totally worth being called out by his little brother about doing the potty dance in the booth. He opened his eyes and lowered his hand onto the urinal handle and flushed. The wolf went to wash his hands, eager to return to devouring mozzarella sticks. As he spied the mirror, his reflection seemed off. Something wasn’t right here. He checked his hair, his fangs, his shirt. All fine, nothing noteworthy. His pants, on the other hand, were magnificently stained, glistening with wetness. The denim had darkened in a patch that originated from his crotch and spread down both pant legs. Down into his socks. He studied the mirror in disbelief, then looked down at himself, placing a paw over the stained crotch and tracing it along the inside seam. He pulled his paw back and confirmed that it was really, truly wet. He looked back at the urinal, perhaps expecting some freak plumbing issue to explain the situation, but was shocked to find a puddle beneath where he once stood. This couldn’t be happening. He had been so careful before. He always followed the rules. Check the seat, pull down your pants, aim, go. He… he hadn’t even bothered to pull down his pants. At all. He had totally missed one of the most critical steps and had somehow remained oblivious to it! The last time this sort of thing happened he was immediately woken from his stupor by the feeling of wet warmth on his body. But this time he had completely emptied his entire bladder into his pants and hadn’t even noticed until well after the fact! It was unbelievable. Something… something must be wrong. He must be feeling sick or something. That’s the only explanation. Lucas wouldn’t just go around wetting his pants for no good reason. He’s had eleven years of experience making it to the potty without any incident! Wait… wasn’t that… good? Lucas ran his hands along the inside of his jeans, attempting to rationalize this incident. He had such a long, unbroken streak of making it to the potty every single day, multiple times a day without any problem. Hundreds, thousands of times executed perfectly. This was a singular incident. If you compared this accident to the sheer volume of successes, this would be so inconsequential that it would be some kind of anomaly. That’s it. It’s an anomaly. Just a random blip that could happen to anyone. Sometimes basketball players miss free throws despite practicing them over and over and over again, and no one bats an eye when that happens. Sure, people want you to make it to the basket, but if you don’t, it’s not the end of the world. Wetting his pants was JUST like that! It was so minor and meaningless that it was barely even worth worrying about. So what he had peed his pants without even noticing? That was no reason to make a big deal out of it! “Hey buddy, everything ok in here?” The voice of a concerned father was one of the most disarming tones. The uncertainty and apprehension from a familiar voice that normally was confident and authoritative somehow made the situation less stable. “Y-yes!” Lucas was spiraling. He was barely able to rationalize what had just happened in any context that didn’t eviscerate his maturing ego. He hadn’t even begun to imagine what he would do to somehow make this acceptable to his family. He looked in the mirror, seeing his dad in the doorway behind him. He looked at himself. He was crying. “N-no it’s not ok. I… I pissed my pants, Dad!” It was a quick step-turn and he was straight into the arms of the older wolf, gripping him in a hug as tears of shame and humiliation streamed down his face. His Dad embraced him in an instant, rubbing his back and quietly saying things that Lucas was far too distraught to hear. What was going on? Why did this happen? How could he have done this after so many years of perfectly understanding his body’s functions? The two held onto each other for long enough that the soaked jeans began to cool and adhere to his legs. The warming comfort that had previously relished the accident faded and made way for awkward, unwelcome wet pants. Lucas’ Dad gave him a few more rubs on the back and then spoke plainly and clearly. “How about we get you home and get you cleaned up? We can get you in some dry clothes and not worry about this. It’s just an accident. It’s ok to have accidents. Everyone has accidents.” He held onto Lucas’ shoulders and forced Lucas back by a step. His Dad looked straight into his eyes. There was genuine concern in that gaze. And there was also love and acceptance. Dad was right. It was just an accident. No need to make a big deal about it. He could just get changed into new clothes and be good as new. -- It was an awkward trip home. Lucas and his Dad took the car back to the house, leaving his Mom and brother at the restaurant (with the intent to return shortly). The two didn’t speak and instead opted to listen to Big Spicy Capsicums, each song fading into each other as the percussive yet nonsensical lyrics filled the void. There was something exceptionally humbling about having help stripping the soaked jeans from his body. It was the implication that Lucas was incapable of managing that task on his own. Or maybe he would somehow find some way to screw it up further. But even so, the help was greatly appreciated and made the feat possible. There was no point in fighting for his autonomy here. He was just happy to have help. The teen felt his short fur, still slick with urine and decided to take a shower. He opted to stay behind when his dad returned to the restaurant. His appetite was diminished following the incident and he couldn’t bear to think of showing his face in the Diamond Thursdays after leaving with soaked pants. That place was officially off-limits for the rest of eternity, plus longer. Without much interest in anything, and especially without wanting to see his younger brother, Lucas shut himself into his room and went to bed early. -- “Well, we knew this would happen. It’s roughly right on schedule too.” Carmella looked over the guidebook that the Retrain System provided. They had laid everything out in the bedroom to make sure they had all of the components ready and accounted for so they weren’t caught off-guard. “It says that we should expect for the accidents to increase in frequency and that this is the most critical part of the program.” “I just feel terrible. He was shaking in my arms and… You know Lucas doesn’t cry much. I hadn’t seen him like that since he was a kid.” Ron paced around the room, his tail tucked between his legs. “We knew this would happen. It’s going to be the biggest speedbump to get over and then all the benefits should start building.” Carmella placed the book down and looked at her husband. She really appreciated Ron’s caring side. It was one of the things that made him so endearing. When they had met at a Capsicum concert ages ago he was helping a friend who was having a bad trip. They bonded over orange slices and overly-expensive festival water. That side had been slowly replaced with a much firmer, authoritative side as the boys aged. Seeing him like this brought back memories of their struggles as new parents, when every decision seemed hyper-important and worth overthinking. “Carmella…” Ron leaned against the dresser and sighed. It was clear that he was scared. Scared that he was making a mistake. She had seen him like this years and years ago. “I… Just don’t want our son to suffer because we made a choice without his consent.” “We did the research. We did our homework. The Retrain System is overwhelmingly positive. It comes up over and over. We saw it in that news segment the other night, remember?” Carmella was still getting used to being the authority figure in this scenario. She had to believe in herself. “This is for his own good. We have one shot to give him the best possible life he can have while he’s still under our roof.” “You’re right.” Ron looked down and then back again. “You’re right.” “You know I would never do this without you here with me. We’re in this together. We both want Lucas to be happy. I think this will work.” “I love you babe. You’ll always be my lil’ pepita.” Carmella smiled despite herself. It was one of the dumbest pet-names you could have and it came from a night when the drunken wolf didn’t know how to say “little pepper”. She was his lil’ pumpkin seed. Ron stepped away from the dresser and straightened up. “So what’s the next step?” -- Lucas woke up as he had the previous few days. The intensity of the strain on his bladder alerted him that he was in danger of losing control at any moment. Unlike the past several nights, where he had drifted off into a void of deep sleep without any memory or attachment to the physical world, his dreams that night were more active. He dreamt of his incident at the restaurant and what went wrong. There was a bizarre sense of comfort surrounding it, however. As he made his way to the bathroom, he briefly recalled feeling calmed about his accident. Instead of being judged or ridiculed or laughed at, he felt that he was not to worry, that everyone understood his predicament. That there was nothing to be ashamed of. Where he expected leering faces judging him and laughing at his failures, he was met with warm faces forgiving his accident and accepting his status. It gave him a bizarre amount of confidence as he prepared himself to pee. He shouldn’t be ashamed of having an accident. It was fine. It was normal. It happened to everyone. The toilet looked… bizarre. Nothing had been done to it. There were no obvious changes to it. But something about it felt uneasy, unnatural. Lucas stared at the porcelain fixture and it was uncanny. His heart was racing. Why? It was just the toilet. He had intimate familiarity with it and a hundred others just like it. But when he looked at this it felt so wrong. The shape was off putting. The geometry offended his perception. His vision swam as he tried to analyze it. Lucas reached out his paw to raise the seat and recoiled as he touched the cold lid. It was like an icicle had pierced his hand. He inhaled and grabbed it again, pulling it up in one swift motion. It felt like a monumental task and his body surged with adrenaline. It was the same feeling he experienced after a big scare in a horror movie. The tension had faded and was replaced with nervous calm. He stood there, staring at the water rippling in the bowl as he completely flooded his undies. The magnitude of relief was indescribable. It felt good to let his bladder relax and to pee straight into his boxers. There wasn’t a single ounce of remorse or panic. He listened to the pitter patter of the droplets of urine splash onto the tile beneath him. It sounded musical and soothing. It was alright. He wasn’t doing a bad thing. He had made it to the bathroom. He had made it to the toilet. He had overcome whatever that strange sensation was. And now he was wetting himself and there was nothing negative happening from it. It was perfectly fine. These things happened and when they happened it wasn’t a big deal. He felt the stream slow and taper and finally finish. He placed his paw against his sodden boxers and a faint smile. It felt… good. It felt… better than when he had gone peepee in the morning previously. There was something forbidden about the act previously and it felt like the shackles had been removed from him. The pool of urine was spreading from his feet and becoming dangerously close to the rugs near the sink. He roused himself from his moment of enjoyment and removed his underwear, using it to mop up as much of the liquid as he could. The accident was substantial and there wasn’t much dry left to the boxers for absorption. So he had to grab fistfuls of toilet paper to soak up the rest. As Lucas cleaned, he felt the swirl of emotions. Cleaning any mess you caused rarely felt good. Whether it was a spilled drink or peed pants. There was the annoyance of having to take the time to fix it combined with the frustration of using insufficient tools. The toilet paper felt insubstantial for absorbing so much liquid and he ended up using most of the roll on this one task. Yet, he didn’t feel ashamed of the act itself. Perhaps it was because he was alone and able to take care of it in private. But something deep inside made him recognize the accident as nothing to worry about. No big deal. It was a neutrality towards wetting himself that he was trying to wrap his mind around. He had to admit that for the brief moment that it was happening it even felt kind of good. The last of the puddle was mopped up and the toilet now had the remains of the spent roll inside of it. His soiled underwear was unceremoniously dumped into the laundry basket. Lucas eyed the handle on the toilet with suspicion. He could do this. It was just flushing the toilet. Why was he so anxious about this? What was the big deal? Why was he raising such a fuss about an action that was so mundane and easy and normal and… Still, he noticed that his paw was shaking as he brought it forward. He wasn’t scared of the toilet! That was ridiculous! He pressed down on the handle and the sound of the infernal machine roared with an intensity that shocked the wolf. He took a step back. Then another. He braced himself against the sink. The gurgle of rushing water pouring through the maze of pipes clashed in his ears. The toilet paper spun in place as the water level rose. He felt his chest heaving up and down. He was drowning. He needed air, yet despite his attempts to breathe, none arrived. He couldn’t bear to look at the source of this frightful sound. The pitch increased as more and more water flowed in, filling the bowl, never emptying, ceaseless and endless and uncontrollable. Lucas stumbled back another step, shimmying along the sink, using it as support. He was trapped in here with this monster. He would be devoured whole. This hideous creature would consume him and no one would ever be the wiser. He cowered, curling into a ball at the base of the sink cabinet. He held his knees to his chest and tried to bring himself comfort in these tragic few moments at the end of his life. And, unceremoniously, a slurping vacuum sound arose from the toilet as the liquid finally flowed down the pipes. There were some sloppy, undignified moments as everything was processed and then the sound of the water in the basin being refilled. It was over in a short time that to the teen felt like an eternity. He rocked back and forth, bawling and yelping as the intensity of what he had just experienced absorbed him. -- Carmella knocked at the bathroom door. She was wearing a robe, something she had gotten for Christmas several years ago that she rarely got the chance to wear. The idea of wearing a robe while puttering around the house in the morning or evening felt quaint and harkened back to a time in history when every moment of the day wasn’t completely accounted for with demands. But when she was woken by her youngest child complaining that her oldest child was crying in the bathroom, it was the appropriate thing to wear. “Sweetie? Are you in there? Are you hurt?” The soft sounds of whimpering from the other side of the door were the only answers she received. She steeled herself and twisted the knob, inching the door forward to peer in. She was not expecting to find her teenage son naked on a bathmat, curled up in a fetal position. Her protective instincts completely overwhelmed her. She threw open the door and rushed in, sliding to the ground in a composed but serious way. She grabbed her child and brought him up, into her embrace. She scanned over his body, desperately needing confirmation that he was physically uninjured. Satisfied, she turned her attention towards her son’s mewling. She slowly rocked back and forth, bringing her son into her rhythm, speaking calming words and low, steady tones. This was a practiced motherly skill. The number of times her boys had managed to superficially injure themselves in the most ridiculous ways was remarkable. So in turn, she had lots of time to refine her technique of assuring someone that they were not in danger and that she was there for them. The one constant that she had yet to be used to was seeing the other sibling observing this delicate act. Too many variables and the process was unmanageable and unpredictable. So she raised her head and shot a glance at Martin, who stood stunned at the doorway. It was a look that somehow conveyed an entire dialogue’s worth of information. The shaken child closed the door, apparently completely understanding the message. “Sweetie… What happened?” Carmella asked in the most tender tone she could muster. “I need you to talk to me sweetheart.” There was that arhythmic intake of air. The body slowly attempting to stabilize itself. That was good. That was normal and part of the process. No matter how dire things seemed, as long as she could get the boys talking, they could calm down. After a few moments, her son had regained enough of his composure to speak. It was shaky and lacked confidence. “The… pot… the toilet. It was… so loud. I don’t know. I don’t know. It was just… I’m so sorry Mom.” He squeezed her tight. This was an interesting development. The Retrain System had mentioned that there was the possibility of the development of a toilet phobia as a result of the course. But it was described as a temporary thing that resulted from the psyche rearranging itself. One of the papers Carmella had looked into listed it as a condition that affected some members of the study. But the authors had described it with such clinical sterility. Seeing the actual outcome of such an episode was difficult for a parent. Still, the research was clear that this was a passing thing. That it was within the expected parameters. She and Ron had talked about this and agreed that it was fine. If their son ended up unpotty trained anyways, it clearly wouldn’t matter in the long run. “Oh honey… Shh, shh, it’s ok. It’s ok. It’s alright to be frightened of the potty every now and then.” She continued to rock her naked child, concerned mostly with making sure he was stable and able to recover from this. The fact that this was a white lie or a massive lie was less important than getting Lucas calmed down. “It is? I… I don’t remember… It was just so big and loud and cold and-” Carmella cut him off, not wanting him to spiral into these bad memories. “It’s alright sweetie, Mommy’s here for you. You don’t have to worry, it’s all over. There’s nothing to be scared of now that I’m here.” She stroked his fur. He smelled faintly of urine, but was completely nude. He must have had another accident and disposed of the evidence. She decided to help him by telling him a true story. “You know, when we were first potty training you, you had a lot of trouble flushing the potty. You always used to make us do it.” “What? Really?” Lucas was blushing beneath his fur. It was embarrassing to think about being so young and vulnerable. “It’s true. Whenever you’d go, you would run out and find your father or me and you’d take us by the hand to the bathroom. You’d hold onto our legs and ask that we flush the potty for you.” “Nuh-uh! No way! That… oh man… That’s so dumb.” Lucas eyed the toilet. Carmella followed his gaze. “You’d say that you were worried about the ‘potty monster’ getting you. Oh you poor thing, I hated seeing you so scared, so it took a long time before you started flushing it on your own. I think we only started having you flush the potty when you were starting to get ready for preschool. Since we wouldn’t be around we were worried you would ask one of the teachers to do it.” “Oh my gods… I can’t believe I was scared of the potty monster like that.” “Well, it wasn’t easy to get you potty trained in the first place. So I think we might have just been happy you were making it to the potty at all. But yes, you used to be terrified of flushing that dang thing. I get it though. You can’t see where the sounds are coming from and when you’re so small it probably looks like a lot of water.” Carmella looked her son in the eyes. “Sweetie, this was a tough year for you. And you’re going through a lot of changes. There’s a lot that’s happening and going to happen to you that will be awkward and maybe even scary. If you think something is going to upset you as much as this, you can always ask for help, ok? No matter how weird it is, your father and I will be there for you.” Lucas silently nodded, seeming to understand her words, or at least the tone of her words. He hugged his mom tightly. He really needed a bath. -- It had been a difficult twenty-four hours for Lucas. He tried his best to maintain his composure following The Incident, however it’s always awkward being around people after having a breakdown. Especially when that breakdown was related to the inability to flush the toilet. His Dad had a talk with him after he got out of the shower and it was a lot more of the same. It was deeply embarrassing to have to keep bringing these things up. He mainly just stayed in his room and played Summit Luminaries. It was nice being able to distract himself. Maybe if enough hours passed, everyone would forget what happened and they could all go back to having things as they were previously. The door to his room opened. With his headset on, normally Lucas wouldn’t have noticed. But it was accompanied by the sound of fictional animal sounds and music. Lucas turned around and rolled his eyes. Martin was dressed in a Charmander shirt and the brightest red shorts pigment science could create. He was carrying his Switch, which had the volume all the way up. He made his way to the bed and sat on it, facing Lucas and the TV, but keeping his focus on his portable game. “Whatcha doing?” “I’m playing some Summit. We’re in the top four right now, so we’re doing good. This rando I’m with is cracked.” “Cool, cool.” There was an awkward pause as the conflicting sounds of two totally different games played out. “So uh… did you wet your pants last night?” That was a great question to get in the heat of a firefight when the ring was closing around you. Lucas chose to ignore it in favor of paying attention to the match. He also wasn’t sure how to answer. It was true. He was oddly unashamed of the accident. Accidents happened. Everyone had accidents. Going peepee in your pants was nothing to worry about. But he couldn’t word the response in a way that he felt comfortable with. “It’s ok if you did. Mom told me when you and Dad left last night.” Someone got the flank on their team. It was a three-way firefight. Not a good situation. It required discipline, skill, luck, and focus to win these difficult encounters. “A kid in class had an accident in the last week of school and it was really gross. I felt bad because he’s always been nice to me but people made fun of him. I promise not to make fun of you.” Thou Art the Luminary of the Summit. Lucas sat his controller down as a friend request popped up on his Ycube. He’d answer that later. He put his head in his hands. “Yeah. I wet my pants at the restaurant. And then again this morning. That’s why I was crying. Well… sort of. It’s complicated.” “I get it! I don’t get all of it but I get that you were upset. I know Mom and Dad talked to you about it. Is everything ok?” “They’re… just accidents.” This felt rehearsed somehow. Like he was repeating something that he had heard or said previously. “Everyone has accidents. It’s no big deal to go peepee in your pants. It’s better to go in your pants than…. To hold it.” That last bit felt off. Like his mind wasn’t syncing up with what his words were saying. It wasn’t wrong. It didn’t feel wrong. It just felt less polished. “Oh. Uh… Really?” “Yeah. I think so. I mean, accidents happen. We can’t get upset about them.” “You were uh… pretty upset.” Lucas looked over his shoulder with a pleading expression. “I said it was complicated. I just feel weird about all this happening at once. Please don’t be a jerk about this.” “I’m not a jerk! I’m sorry that I was worried about my hecking brother hecking crying on the hecking floor. Geez!” Martin normally didn’t take a sarcastic tone with Lucas. He’d only recently figured it out and hadn’t perfected how to use it. “Ughhhhh… no, no, it’s… fine. I’ll be ok.” There was another pause filled with the sounds of Martin clicking away at the buttons on his console, presumably issuing commands for his miniature monsters to murder his opponent’s minions. “Can I stay and play games in here with you for a while?” “Sure. Yeah. That sounds good.” -- It was actually nice having Martin in the room with him. Ever since they got two rooms a couple years ago, they had kept apart from each other. Not out of animosity (most of the time) but just out of preference of having their own spaces to be in. Lucas remembered his Dad being bummed that he had to give up his hobby room for Martin’s bedroom. There were still spots on the wall from where his airbrush had oversprayed. They kept saying they would paint the room but it was a chore. Martin covered just about everything up with Pokemon stickers and posters, so clearly he didn’t mind. Being next to each other in a parallel play setting was surprisingly easy. Even though the music was a little distracting. They had done it a lot back when they shared a bedroom. Maybe it was the novelty of doing a pleasant activity that he hadn’t done in a while, but it really did cheer Lucas up. It was unfortunate that he was in the middle of a match when the urge to pee struck. He was so focused, so determined, so poised and ready to win that he completely neglected to think about how full his bladder had become. His water jug had been drained over the course of several rounds and now it had run its course. He sat forward in his seat. He could hold out. Now that he knew what was going on he could make it. He just had to last through this tense… legs crossed… round and he… lips bitten… could go potty… squirming, dancing, rocking back and forth… “Hey do you have to pee? Go do it, I’ve got it!” “Huh?” “Give me the controller, go pee!” Lucas was very unaccustomed to being talked to like that by his younger brother, but he was absolutely right. He really had to go and it was a reasonable offer. So he got behind cover and handed the Ybox controller off, awkwardly jutting out of the chair and towards the restroom. The toilet was still there from where he had previously left it. Still ominously waiting. Still emitting strange vibes and negativity and suspense. But Lucas wasn’t going to let the potty monster win. Or the fictional potty monster of his youth, more correctly. He was going to walk straight up to that toilet and use it and NOT get any pee into his pants. It was a good plan. A great plan, even. But no plan survives first contact with the enemy. At the worst possible time, the plumbing refreshed, turning on to refill some of the water within the tank. It might as well have been the roar of a great beast, as Lucas froze in his tracks. The hold on his bladder released and he felt the warm trickle blossom from his board shorts. No no no! Not after all this build up and discussion. It was just a dumb toilet. Lucas straightened up and constricted his muscles, stemming the flow and stopping this from becoming a complete disaster. He was going to use the potty, darn it! Lucas unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, not caring that the front of his pants were stained and soaked. He could deal with that later. Not wanting to risk anything interfering with this at all, he dropped his pants and underwear onto the floor, allowing them to pool around his feet. Finally, he took aim, and relaxed. When he finished, he was pleased with himself. Yes, he had just wet himself and technically had another accident. But as he had verbally acknowledged just recently, accidents happened. And it was ok to have accidents in your pants. The important thing was that he had made it to the potty and had used it. It was a partial victory, but a victory nonetheless. A problem arose as his body attempted to go through the practiced motions of completing the deed. He paused as his hand was en route to the handle. He had just spent a not insignificant amount of time crying in the bathroom earlier today thanks to the shockingly disturbing sounds this contraption could make. He had to flush. That was proper procedure. It was part of using the toilet. If he used the toilet, he had to flush. Yet his hand went no further. He could not bring himself to press down on the lever in front of him. The wolf frowned and pulled up his damp clothes. They weren’t too badly sodden. It wasn’t that uncomfortable to wear them. It was no big deal to have peepee pants. Accidents happened to everyone. He didn’t need to worry about his pants if he went potty in them. Still, he felt the compulsion to finish his task with the toilet, so he poked his head out from the doorway in the bathroom. “Hey Martin…” “One sec! Just… we… heck!” Martin got up from the gaming chair and headed over. “Ok well you got second place. I downed two guys but I didn’t like the gun you had. What’s up?” “Um… Could you do me a favor?” Martin squinted from behind his glasses. “That depends.” “Can you… flush the potty?” Martin’s eyes widened. And then narrowed. “You’re joking with me. I thought we were cool and you were being honest with me and now you’re just messing around.” “No, dude… I… Remember when I said it was complicated earlier? Well… This is what I meant. Please. I’m not trying to mess with you. I’m trying my best to be real.” Lucas couldn’t make eye-contact. This was difficult for him and it was impossible to hide how raw this made him feel. “Wow. Uh… Ok. But this better not be a prank or a trick or whatever.” Lucas showed his brother in and led him to the scene of his defeat. Martin looked at Lucas, who was trembling just the smallest bit, then looked at the stained pants, then looked at the toilet. He seemed unsure, but he followed through with his agreement and pushed the handle down, flushing the toilet. To Lucas, the rush of water sounded like a flood ready to crash into the house, threatening to wash away the very foundations of his life. He acted on pure impulse and grabbed ahold of his younger brother’s side, sheltering in his embrace. Lucas’s mind had no concept of the world around him as the primal terror ripped through him a second time in the same day. All he cared about was that he had someone there with him to protect him from the awful, awful, terrible potty monster. “Wow. You really weren’t kidding.” -- Things did not get easier for Lucas after that point. In fact, the potty monster became a central concern throughout his days following that breakdown. It was difficult for him to look at it for too long, causing him to become sloppy with his aim. And it seemed as if every several attempts to use the bathroom resulted in soaky pants. It was always a little distraction or a little surprise or a little forgotten step. It was like the checklist that normally ran through his head when ensuring he was going to use the bathroom correctly, sometimes jumbled up at random. One time he removed his pants and underwear entirely and pissed right onto the closed lid of the toilet. It was disheartening that somehow he was unable to go peepee how he wanted and expected to. But it was simultaneously not a big deal at all when he let loose in his shorts. It was a strange juxtaposition of disappointment and contentment to end up with wet pants. The wet pants weren’t an issue in the slightest to him. Accidents happened to everyone. It was normal to have accidents. It was normal to go peepee in his pants. It was perfectly fine if he piddled in his pants all the time. It was no big deal at all if he soaked himself. It was just an accident and that was ok. But he would have preferred to use the potty as he wanted. It was just so difficult! The steps involved made the process complicated. He was fighting against unreliable signals from his body. It felt like he could not trust when he actually needed to go! It was a real pain to dash over to the bathroom, interrupting his task, totally throwing off whatever he was doing, only to find out that apparently he didn’t have to go at all! The worst part was the foreboding sense of dread when he looked at the toilet. In his eyes, the potty monster was real and it was growing in power. It gave him genuine anxiety to attempt to focus on it. And the sounds it made were abysmal and arcane. It was a machine designed to haunt him and torture him. And the nature of going potty meant that Lucas was alone with this beast the whole time. Thankfully, his family had been extremely understanding of him. His parents reinforced and agreed that it was perfectly normal to have accidents. He never felt ashamed when he emerged from the bathroom absolutely drenched with a puddle trailing behind him. The only thing his mother asked was that he clean up his messes and put down a towel on his chair. So keeping a roll of paper towels in the bathroom became standard, and his chair was draped in a bath towel at all times. Beyond just the accidents, his relationship with his Mom and Dad was better than ever, at least as far as he could remember. In Lucas’ eyes it must have just been because of the distance between previous school issues and the summer break. But the reality was that he found himself able to see their point of view more easily and he felt like he could trust them more. He was also contributing to the chores, having become especially proficient at running the laundry. It was possibly the least amount of tension the house had since Lucas started puberty. Martin was surprisingly supportive. Lucas was most appreciative of that. It was an unsettling amount of changes in his life. Having his parents tell him that he was doing fine and not to worry was nice. But having his brother help him flush and clean up his accidents and remind him to make it to the potty at all was exceptionally reassuring. The two brothers found themselves around each other a lot, especially during the summer when their parents were at work. Most of the time it was just playing their separate games near each other. But they also watched cartoons and just talked. They had the house to themselves frequently and for Lucas, having Martin around was a blessing. It wasn’t perfect, obviously. Martin wasn’t always thrilled that he was suddenly his brother’s toilet coach. And there was a little friction when he wasn’t paying attention and Lucas had an accident without even making it to the toilet at all. And it was gross cleaning that stuff up. But despite that, they really seemed to connect and bond more in the first two weeks of summer vacation than any of the last school year. The nighttime meditation program was the biggest win for Lucas, in his opinion. He was sleeping soundly and restfully every single night. He would go to sleep and the white noise would fill his ears and he would drift away into a realm of relaxation and soothing peace. His parents were absolutely right about the stress-relieving properties of the system. He wouldn’t dare dream of having it shipped back to Nile. He was a firm believer in the helpful properties of sleep meditation now. Lucas missed his friends. They talked a lot while playing games together (their attention had drifted from Summit Luminaries to Tumble Bros in the last week). But being physically around them would be nice. He decided to message Noah to see what he was up to. Normally he would include Jake, but he was off at his big fancy soccer camp by then. [ayyyyyy] [sup son] [whatre you doing today] [laundry uhhhhh chillin kinda bored] [same] Lucas omitted that the reason why he was doing laundry was because he had several pee-soaked undies and shorts he needed cleaned. [well thanks for the important info lmao] [bruh shut up lol. Wanna hang out?] [Sure, come on otter.] [*other] [*over ducking autocorrect] Lucas was giddy. Even though the two of them lived in the same neighborhood and saw each other constantly, plus all the time spent together at school, it was always great to hang out with Noah. Plus it was the weekend so he didn’t have to worry about leaving his kid brother at home alone or being forced to have him tag along. “Hey Mom, I’m going over to Noah’s house.” “Ok sounds good sweetie… Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!” Lucas paused, his backpack over one shoulder. Did he forget something? The laundry was in the dryer and he could always pull it out when he got home. He didn’t think there was anything else going on today. “Huh? What?” He heard shuffling around from the other room as his mom stopped writing on her laptop, having to put away papers and books scattered around her. She was working on a novel in her spare time and had gotten to the “constant fact-checking and referencing” stage of the process, apparently. His mother looked a little apprehensive. “Are you sure that you want to go over to visit Noah?” “...yes?” “Well, it’s just that… uh… sweetie, with all the potty problems you’ve been having I think that… Um…” “Mooommmmm! Ohmygods I know how to use the potty! Those were just little accidents! Accidents happen to everyone! It’s no big deal to have peepee accidents in my pants, DUH!” Lucas stated this in a way that felt like he was describing a part of his identity. He could have been defending the color of his fur or how he could ride a bicycle or any other number of complete facts and truths about himself. In his mind, there was legitimately no reason to question his ability to use the bathroom, nor was there any reason to be concerned with the quantity and severity of his failures to use said bathroom. His Mom pursed her lips, thinking very carefully before speaking. Her words were slow as she attempted to pick the correct words. “Right, yes, AND that’s good. But, I think, how about you bring a spare set of clothes with you to Noah’s house? Just in case you have a big accident and need to change.” Lucas hadn’t thought of that. He had been taking for granted that he could just throw his soaked clothes into the hamper and grab a fresh set whenever he wanted. Although “fresh set” was starting to become a loaded term, as his lighter pairs of underwear had started taking on a yellow-tinged appearance, even after being cleaned. He hadn’t considered that he might need to prepare himself in case he had an accident outside of the house. He was only just now realizing that he was pretty home-bound the last week or so. It just hadn’t come up! “Oh! Yeah, that’s a good idea. I’m definitely going to make it to the potty for sure, but just in case I go peepee in my pants a little bit it would be nice to have clean pants.” The wolf was smiling as he was agreeing with his Mom’s plan. It felt good to declare that he was going to ABSOLUTELY make it to the potty. And it felt even better to have a back-up plan just in case anything happened. Something about saying it out loud made him swell with pride over being thoughtful and responsible. “There we go, sweetie. I’m sure you will.” Lucas’ Mom gave him a big hug. It felt kind of sentimental. Lucas had gone over to Noah’s house countless times. It was never a big deal before. But this was the same kind of hug that Lucas got on the first day of school or if he left for a big trip or had an event coming up. It was a special hug that indicated that his Mom was rooting for him. Which, again, was a little bit too soppy for just visiting one of his best friends a couple houses down. But whatever, the hug felt nice! “I’ll call up Noah’s mom while you get the clothes so she’ll know you’re coming.” -- Noah greeted Lucas at the door with an upturned nod and an “Ayyyy!”, letting him inside. Noah’s house was similar to Lucas’ since they were part of the same development. But there were enough small differences and customizations that it felt more like an alternate universe house instead of a copycat. Like, the organization of the rooms were slightly different. And the location of the bathroom downstairs was reversed. And their back porch was covered, which always seemed nice except for every time Noah’s dad hosted a cookout, where it seemed surprisingly inconvenient. Noah flopped onto the couch and Lucas followed. “Wanna chill down here?” “Oh! Sure!” Lucas was surprised. Normally they made a direct line for his bedroom. The den had a nice TV but that was about it. “What’ve you been up to? It feels weird that we haven’t seen each other lately.” The fox looked off to the side, biting his lip, and then reverted to a happier expression. “Oh just doing nothing! I mean we’ve been on Tumult like every day. I guess just destressing you know? Like uh relaxing during summer you know haha!” Lucas pulled back his head and raised an eyebrow, giving his friend a skeptical look. “Yeah, no, I… know what summer is.” Noah nodded. And there was an awkward pause. The fox rubbed his left leg, which was covered in a mottled pattern thanks to his summer shedding. His distinctive red coat making way for a duller, shorter brown. “Want to watch a movie?” “Yeah! Sure! I haven’t seen the new Wonder movie. Doctor Unusual and the Peril Portals or whatever it’s called.” Lucas felt like he couldn’t just rattle off geeky movie titles. There had to be some diffusion to make sure that he wasn’t TOO into his interests. A simple “or whatever” deflected all evidence that he was, in fact, some kind of geek. “I haven’t either. Let’s see if we have it available.” -- The movie was a CGI-fest continuing the interwoven narrative of all the Wonder-brand superhero movies. For the two teens, it was custom-built entertainment made specifically to enthrall them. They laughed at the cheesy jokes and recoiled at the occasional bizarre and frightful scene. They both had large glasses of water next to them that they slammed down. Lucas had noticed that for some reason he felt parched more often during the day. Maybe it was the summer heat. He had gotten accustomed to refilling his large bottle that he kept in his room frequently. About halfway through the runtime, Lucas ran his paws along his legs, squirming in his seat on the sofa. He wasn’t sure why he did it. But he did it again and he felt himself sit upright. Something was informing him that something was happening. He was very focused on the movie and having his body warn him about a mysterious sensation was not what he expected or wanted. He lifted up off his seat to readjust. Both hands were wedged in between his legs now. The wolf had no idea what could possibly be causing this kind of response. Was he adapting to the pace of the movie? It was a strange movie, after all. These subconscious questions were instantly answered as his paws suddenly warmed and became drenched. Even while sitting down, his body trying its very best to defend against this, he could not stop himself from wetting his pants. Lucas clenched, trying his very best to stop himself, although it was really not a good effort. Instead of having absolute certainty that his wetting was abated, he found it turned off briefly and then resumed briefly, only to turn off again. Basically he had to go potty right now and it was so bad that he was having trouble stopping it entirely. Lucas awkwardly stood, hunched over and hands cupped to hide his crotch from his best friend. “Hey uh pause the movie one sec.” It wasn’t a request, it was a desperate plea at a normal response for this situation. He shuffled, back facing his friend the entire time, and jetted towards Noah’s bathroom. As he moved his control shattered and he could feel the pressure welling inside and then releasing into his pants. He scooped up his backpack in a manner that would have been very fluid and cool in literally any other context. Noah was bizarrely quiet during this whole incident. But Lucas didn’t care. That didn’t matter. Maybe it mattered for future Lucas, but present Lucas had his own problems. The primary problem, it turns out, was that Noah’s family casually chose to keep a complete nightmare creature in their bathroom. Their toilet might as well have been a blood-sucking, infant-devouring, sharp-fanged, deadly beast intent for vengeance and carnage. The moment Lucas turned on the light and looked in its direction, he froze. And all control that he had previously maintained vanished. Piss gushed down his legs and onto the bathmat beneath him. He was paralyzed so long as that awful, awful THING was even in the same room as him. He felt his muscles tense and constrict. He could feel the sensation of terror and overwhelming despair wash over him as it had previously. The potty monster was real and it was living in the bathrooms of families around the globe. “Hey uh, you ok?” Lucas wheeled around as he found Noah behind him, looking uncomfortable and out of place in his own home. With the line of sight broken and replaced with his best friend, and with his bladder now fully emptied into his shorts, the wolf felt worlds better. He took a moment, inhaled, held it, and exhaled. “Y-yeah. Yeah. I just… saw something that frightened me.” “Was it the potty monster?” Lucas cocked his head and blinked. It sounded somewhat normal for him to say it. And he certainly had no issues thinking it. But to hear his best friend, who, to his knowledge, had no problems with the potty, refer to it that way… It was shocking and unexpected. “You… know about the potty monster?” Noah looked sheepish and retreated into his shell a little. It was so unlike him. He was always talking. Always asking questions. Always interacting. To see the fox act bashful was extremely out of character. “I have… um… been having trouble making it…. To the potty.” Noah looked down and moved his hands, which had been previously obscuring his crotch. Lucas was shocked to find a similar wet-patch to the one gracing his pants. Except Noah’s was far less pronounced, mainly forming crescent rings along the inner thighs. “Mainly because I’ve been really scared of the potty monster lately. And so um… My… mom she… uh…” “Your mother decided that maybe you weren’t ready for the potty right now.” Noah’s mother appeared, completing the group. “I heard some stomping around down here and figured I should check. Oh Lucas, you poor thing, did you have an accident?” Lucas was like an animal in blinding headlights. Behind him, a destruction-crazed brute waited ominously to swallow him whole. And in front of him, his best friend in the world had pee pants and his mom was just casually seeing both of their accidents. It was surreal. Yet at the core of the situation, Lucas knew in his heart of hearts that having an accident was perfectly fine. It was no big deal to have an accident. Accidents happened all the time and to many people. And it was ok to tell people if he had an accident. “Yes Mrs. Seong. I went peepee in my pants because I was scared by the potty monster.” It all came out remarkably naturally. Unlike Noah, he did not have to force the words out. It came out practiced and natural. There was almost a fun element to admitting he had gone potty in his pants to an adult. It felt rewarding to admit. It wasn’t the entire truth, as he was wetting himself when sitting on their couch (a fact he hoped would not be an issue). But it was so much of the truth in his heart that it was what mattered to him. “Lucas, goodness, and Noah too! You both don’t need to worry one bit. It’s perfectly fine. These accidents happen. Come on, let's get you boys upstairs and we can get you changed into dry clothes.” It was nice being guided through this by an adult. Much nicer than Lucas expected. Mrs. Seong guided the pair up to Noah’s room and ushered them both inside. Lucas immediately understood why Noah wanted to remain downstairs. On the wall, next to his dresser, was a chart showing the days of the week. And on that chart were a series of smiley faces and frowny faces. The chart was even labeled. It was a Potty Chart. Lucas glanced over at Noah, who was hiding his head in his hands out of embarrassment. “Noah, can you tell me what happened?” His mother was stooping to his level. Noah had only just started having his growth spurts. “Noah, I need you to tell me, baby.” “I… wet my pants. I thought I could hold it… but I couldn’t. And I’m not a baby, mom.” “You’re MY baby, and I’m very proud of you for telling me the truth. Go put a smiley face on the chart.” Lucas could see the leaden legs just barely doing their jobs, stomping over to the board with reluctance. Mrs. Seong leaned towards Lucas as he watched. “He’s just a little grumpy. He’ll cheer up once he’s in clean undies.” “MOOOMMM!” Noah turned, his face flush, the pout on his lips possibly being the worst blend of serious and precious possible. He huffed and grabbed a bright yellow smiley face from a pouch and attached it to the middle part of the chart for the day. Something about this was… appealing to Lucas. Noah was making a big deal about it but… It must have felt nice to have confirmation that you did a good job even if that means you didn’t fully (or at all) make it to the potty. “Now Lucas, your mom called me when you came over. I have some grocery bags here that you can put your wet clothes in. She said you brought a change of pants and undies? Good, good. Do you need help getting dressed?” “N-no, I think I can do it.” “Good boy.” The secret weapon used for ages against canines of all sorts to keep them in check. Lucas was a SUCKER for being called a good boy. It had minimal effect when another canine used it, but when another species acknowledged it, boy it hit the spot. His tail was wagging proudly and loudly. “I’m going to help Noah get cleaned up and then you boys can get back to your movie.” By this point, the teen wolf was an expert at undressing and redressing from stained clothes to fresh clothes. Noah’s mom even gave him wipes so he could clean off and still smell nice. He would have to ask his mom for something like that the next time they went grocery shopping. The interesting part was Noah’s outfit. The fox wasn’t wearing normal underwear. He was wearing briefs that were thick. Massively thick. And swollen like a sponge! “C’mon, go get your fresh training pants. There we go. One leg in, and now the other…” Training pants? Training for… what? The novelty of being rewarded on a chart on the wall had made him gloss over the purpose for it. Those kinds of charts tracked reactions towards accidents. And the training pants were supposed to be for training to do what exactly with accidents? Mrs. Seong must have caught him staring, because she answered the very question on his mind. “Noah is wearing special training pants so if he has a little accident he can keep playing and not have to worry. Isn’t that right?” Noah grumbled something as he pulled up his cargo pants. Lucas was insanely, intensely jealous of those training pants. -- Noah and Lucas had a difficult time finishing the movie together. Noah seemed uncomfortable during the whole thing. He would get up, pat himself down, then sit back down. It was like he wasn’t sure if he left his phone in his mom’s car or something. Lucas, on the other hand, had the mental image of the training pants burned into his mind. As Doctor Unusual interacted with characters from different dimensions, the wolf just couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to have undies that were so thick that he didn’t need to worry about accidents. It would give him so much more freedom and comfort. He put zero energy into thinking about the potty chart in his best friend’s room. Something about it made it almost fade from memory. Like his mind was instructing him to put no thought into it. By the time the movie was over, its runtime of well-over two hours plus five post-credit sequences, it was nearing dinner time. The two teens were scrolling on their phones next to each other. Lucas got the impression that Noah wasn’t feeling particularly extroverted today. The two spent some time scrolling through the endless content void of ChikChok. Noah would occasionally lean over and show off something funny or weird, and Lucas would show off some of the cool dances he saw. “So Lucas, will you be staying for dinner?” The wolf looked up, startled at how absorbed he was into browsing his device. “Uhhh… No thank you, Mrs. Seong! I should probably get going.” Lucas had made the mistake of inviting himself over to a friend’s house when they clearly wanted him to leave before. He was just an oblivious kid so he didn’t know it was rude to invite himself to stay. His parents seemed mortified when he told them later and spent a long time reinforcing the proper etiquette in those situations. “Are you sure? Mr. Seong is still on his business trip and we have enough food for you if you’d like.” The exception seemed to be that Noah’s mom had infinite patience with Lucas being around. Maybe it was the duration of their friendship or maybe it was some cultural thing. This was part of the “dance” as mom liked to put it. He had to figure out if this was a legitimate offer or just a nicety that was intended to be rejected. He always messed that part up. Lucas looked at his friend on the couch, still browsing the app. Noah felt pretty distant today. That was fine, not every day had to be a slam dunk. But this was beyond normal recharge rates. He was in a funk. It was really weird trying to analyze the situation, however. In Lucas’ eyes, there was nothing obvious that could result in such disinterest. Noah was on summer vacation, could play games and hang out as much as he wanted, he wasn’t grounded, and he hadn’t mentioned any big problems looming over him. Sure he was scared of the potty monster, but Lucas had already accepted into his heart that the potty monster was real and dangerous. If Noah felt the same way then they should have been bonding over it. Was it the accident? Or changing in front of Lucas? They had seen each other naked during the brief period when the school required showering after gym class (which was quickly abandoned due to a variety of issues). Nothing came to mind that seemed like a big deal. “I appreciate it, Mrs. Seong, but Mom had some special dinner she was working on for tonight. I should go find out what it is. Thank you, though!” Lucas decided that his presence probably wouldn’t make the situation any better here. Maybe after a good night’s sleep Noah would feel better. -- Dinner was an experiment. And like some experiments, it was subject to statistical interpretation. Much to his Dad’s credit, the liver sticks, two-and-a-half-bean salad, spinach cookies, and onion juice were all consumed. Whether they remained consumed would be up for scholarly debate for decades to come. Lucas wondered if perhaps it would have been better to endure an awkward social situation to score free food from Mrs. Seong. Similar thoughts became common for Lucas later in his life. Still, he ate enough to withstand the judgment of his Mom. He learned extremely fast in life that “Do you like it?” coming from his mother was not a question with multiple answers. “Did you have a fun time at Noah’s?” His Mom asked, before daintily sipping at her squeezed allium. “Yeah, uh, sort of. Noah had a big accident while I was there. Oh heck, uh, yeah sorry I also had an accident too. I kind of forgot, I need to take the wet clothes out of my bag.” Lucas moved a piece of liver from one side of the plate to the other, as if it might transform into pizza with some encouragement. “But yeah Noah was just kind of off after he changed into fresh training pants. I was hoping to hang out but he seemed really bummed. I don’t get it.” Lucas caught his Dad looking up from his food out of the corner of his eye. When the teen turned, in anticipation that he might say something, his Dad’s head was lowered again. “Well, sweetie, sometimes people feel things that they don’t always understand. Noah is your friend and I’m sure that this will pass. Just make sure that you’re there for him. That means listening to him when he needs it.” Lucas was pretty sure he understood what his Mom meant. Maybe not all of it, but at least the part about being there for his friend. He took a drink of onion juice, its sharp initial kick giving way for a surprisingly mellow sweetness on the after- “No it’s fine, nobody needs to ask me about the THREE shinies that I caught today.” The onion juice was snorted back out into the cup. It was less pleasant when it ran through his nostrils. -- That night was notable. The sleep meditation had so far been exceptional, producing fantastic rest and mostly unremarkable dreams. This time, as Lucas dreamt, it was not just the waves of static crashing against him, the binaural rhythm shifting him back and forth, back and forth, rocking endlessly. It was accompanied by a sense of warmth. A sense of relief. A sense of fulfillment. Lucas floated atop an endless sea, its currents so subtle that the water appeared as glass. His arms outstretched, his legs spread wide. They were somehow doubled. His arms at his side and his legs together. He felt encircled. Measured. Perfect. Not for perfection’s sake but perfect in self. He could be in any place he wished, in any way he wished. But to float along felt best. The stars drifted overhead, whirling and dancing in their unified course. Rotating as one. Like scattered jewels upon a pall of velvet, they glistened. Their age was meaningless. Their isolation, trivial. Their intent could never be understood. These beacons of distant eons traveled across the unfathomable distance of space. They cared not. They wanted not. Their existence revealed the true scale to those who observed. The stars showed the way things were. The way things are. The way things will be. And these stars moved in the darkened sky above Lucas. It was impossible to take in and impossible to look away. They, somehow, found their way from the most remote of places to him. So that he could bask in their Being. It was overwhelming to take in. The water beneath him was warm. It was inviting. It beckoned him. The beauty above must be mirrored by the beauty below. He felt himself sink. The water rushed around him, obscuring the vision of the cosmos. It should have been terrifying to descend. It should have been terrible to witness the world of the breathing rise further and further away. Out of arm’s grasp. Shimmering as a barrier. The crushing depths of the ocean’s deepest, darkest places should have been horrific. But they were not. And so Lucas found himself once more resting. The shining sand of the sea floor beneath him. His legs, crossed, soles to the sky. His hands, placed, palms to the sky. The darkness that surrounded him gave him clarity. Clarity to see what was beyond the means of perception. The mysteries of the deep did not unravel themselves so easily, but he had no want for time. He was not pressed for answers. He basked in the warmth. The relief. The comforting embrace of the pleasant waters. -- Lucas yawned and raised his arms in bed, blinking. He stretched them out and arched his back. He had the most beautiful and meaningful dream. It was incredible and he left him feeling almost sad that he had to leave it. He couldn’t remember it exactly, just that he had greatly enjoyed it. He felt like he understood things a little better. What that meant, he didn’t know. It was just a sense that he came out of that dream better than when he entered. He gave a great big stretch and lowered himself back on the bed, intending to check his phone to see if he had slept through his alarm. The sun had risen but in the summer that could have meant any time in the day. His back touched cool, wet sheets. If he wasn’t awake before, he was certainly awake now. He brought his arms down and slid them under the comforter. His paws touched the same wetness. He felt around, finding that this wet sensation spread all around him. And given the sensation on this back, it went all the way up to his shoulders. He frowned and blinked, his morning brain working through the problem like a single hamster running in a wheel. He leaned forward, the sheets clinging to him in a very familiar way, and rotated his body ninety degrees, swinging his legs out. He sighed, really not happy that there was something going on with the bed that he just spent all night sleeping in. He hopped out and in one quick motion, as if he could catch something in the act of fleeing, he threw off the comforter, revealing his bedsheets beneath. His bed was drenched, a dark stain spread from where his body had been positioned. Based on the tide marks around the edges of where it had begun to dry, this had been even bigger at one point. It had spread from around his knees all the way up to his back. Lucas leaned over and examined it, trying to wrap his mind around what had happened. He stopped himself. It was prudent for him to try to make it to the potty as soon as he woke up, THEN try to see what was going on. Except, he didn’t have to go. At all. His bladder was totally empty. There was no rush at all. Lucas was not so far gone that he was unable to tell when he had to go peepee in the big boy potty. And his body was telling him that there was absolutely no need to even try. This was around when he noticed that his boxers were totally drenched and that there was a distinct smell of stale urine around him. The wolf’s fur bristled. He felt the heat of embarrassment rise to his cheeks and firmly take hold. He had wet the bed. He had completely soaked his sheets and he slept through the entire thing. Of course he didn’t have to go potty. He had already spent all night going potty in his bed! This was a tough thing to handle by himself. He had two options. He could take the sheets down to the laundry room and shove them in and hope that nobody would ask him why he was running the wash first thing in the morning. That made sense. That would probably work and let him get away with this. Or he could tell his parents that he had wet the bed. Some unknown, unexplainable compulsion made that the obvious solution to this problem. If he told his parents then it would be a good idea. If he told his parents that he wet the bed, they would be able to help. It was important that boys who wet the bed tell their parents right away. Why was it important to fill them in? That wasn’t a question with an answer. It was just some kind of deep truth within the teen that resonated with his sense of self. It was ok to wet the bed! Lots of people wet the bed! Wetting the bed was no problem at all. And because it was perfectly natural and normal and healthy and good to wet the bed, that meant that it was also a good idea to let his parents know. Lucas pondered this for a lot longer than he probably realized. The choice of keeping his accidents a secret had never appeared in his mind, really. For some reason, he was always very open about them. In fact, it felt good to tell his Mom and Dad that he had gone peepee in his pants a whole lot. It even felt good to tell Martin about it, even if he seemed less thrilled with this information than his parents did. It was odd to even contemplate keeping this event from anyone. What was the point in hiding it? Why would Lucas even want to hide it? If anything, the choice between attempting to keep his bedwetting a secret and admitting it outright became less and less of a choice the more he thought about it. It was really silly to bother hiding these sorts of things. He wouldn’t get in trouble for being honest, but who knew if he would get in trouble for being deceptive. Why had he even wanted to keep it a secret in the first place? What a weird thing to have pop up in his mind. Maybe it was like when he looked over the ledge of a tall building and imagined dropping his phone several stories. Or when he imagined what it would be like to ram his shopping cart into another cart at the store. Some kind of strange hypothetical situation that the mind ran through whenever presented with possibilities. Yes, clearly there was no argument or validity to keeping this from his family. Lucas had wet the bed and he wanted to make sure everyone knew about it! -- Carmella was not expecting to have her bedroom door knocked on at 7:30 in the morning. Or any time before she had her coffee. She tried her best to be a morning person, but no matter how many years she devoted to the task, she wished she could stay up late and wake up late. Sadly that wasn’t her life. She did have the ability to make the characters in her passion project novel night owls. But she found that sleeping pattern discussion never really fit in with ranch romance plots. Yes, ranch romance. She was very happy with Ron but… she couldn’t help that she loved a man in denim. It was possible to write a romance story while being happily married, thankyouverymuch! “Sweetie, what is it?” Carmella asked, fighting back a yawn. Her kid was lucky she was already out of the shower. “Mom! Mom! You have to come see!” “Can you tell Mommy? I still have to get ready for work, sweetheart. Is everything ok?” Her son was surprisingly chipper. “It’s fine! I wet my bed! I was sleeping and I didn’t wake up and I needed to pee I guess and I just went in my bed and now my bed is really soaky and wet and there’s a big puddle in it.” Through still unfocused morning vision she looked down at Lucas, noting that his boxers were positively drenched and he stank of stale urine. So, it’s finally happened, she thought. I’ll have to text Ron to let him know we’re moving to the next stage. “Ok sweetie. That’s very good that you told me. Go upstairs and grab all the sheets off the bed. We’re going to have to wash them.” Carmella lost out to the yawn. She hid it behind her paw. “Don’t you want to come see it?” Lucas tilted his head. This kind of interest in showing off bodily waste was a male phenomena that Carmella had never grown accustomed to. She had changed far too many blowouts and trainwrecked diapers when the boys were little to even be dazed by it anymore. “No, no, I believe you. I just have to get ready for work….” The sheer disappointment in the eyes of her teenage son when she denied his request to see evidence that he was a bedwetter was not something she expected. He was about to enter the next stage of the Retrain System so… Sigh. She hated disappointing her kids. “But… Ok c’mon, get up there. I’m coming. You better not be fibbing!” “I’m not, I promise! I really wet the bed!” -- That evening, after dinner, Lucas had a meeting with his parents. They wanted a progress update on how he’d been feeling lately. It was nearly three weeks after the meditation machine had been installed and he was extremely pleased with how well it worked. He was sleeping great and that was impacting his mood in a positive way! They met in his bedroom, much like how they had done at the start of this. This was unlike the last time, where Lucas had been dreading the constant discussions and disappointment from his parents and all the hassles. This time he was excited to share the progress he had made! He sat on his bed, which still lacked sheets. A mass of towels laid on the spot he previously slept in. He was told to keep them there until the mattress dried, which was bound to happen eventually, he assumed. “So, Lucas, um… Have you been feeling well?” His Dad looked almost timid. It would have been a concerning question to start off with if it wasn’t the whole point of the meeting. “Yep! I’ve been feeling great. I really like the sleep meditation stuff. It feels really nice to fall asleep and stay asleep. I can feel it helping me.” The young wolf smiled. He was proud that he had made the mature decision to accept his parents’ offer. It was the kind of thing that some teens probably would have fought back against and not taken seriously. “I see that you’ve been hanging out a lot with your brother. Are you two getting along?” His Mom had her hands on her knees and was gripping them, as if bracing for something. “Uh-huh! Martin is a pain sometimes but it’s been cool playing games with him. And he’s helped me with um… the potty monster.” The less said about the potty monster, the better. “He’s told me that he’s been helping you flush the toilet.” “Y-yeah. It’s not so bad when he’s there to keep me safe from the potty monster. But it’s still really scary.” He really hoped they weren’t about to start grilling him on this. They knew that this was a sore subject! “That’s good that you two are talking and working together. Your father and I have been talking too. We have noticed that you’ve had a lot of accidents lately and now you’ve started wetting the bed.” Lucas had to admit that he was having more accidents than he normally had. Which wasn’t a bad thing! It was normal to have lots and lots of accidents! “And we think that you might not be ready for the big boy potty.” “HUH?” Lucas was stunned! That was outrageous! He was SO ready for the big boy potty!! “What your mother is saying is that, er, it’s not that we don’t trust you to be a big boy about lots of things. We’re very proud of how mature and well-behaved you’ve been. And we’re so excited for you to go into high school after the summer. But we think it would be a lot of stress for you to have these kinds of accidents at school around all your new friends.” Lucas tried to puzzle out what on earth they were talking about. They could talk as much as they wanted about him being mature and responsible and all that but this was his big boy potty privileges! He earned those years and years ago! They can’t just get revoked like that! He was totally qualified to make it to the potty on time whenever he wanted! “What are you… I! Am! Potty! Trained! I know how to use the potty!” He was standing, his fists balled at his sides. “Sweetie, sweetie, we aren’t saying you aren’t potty trained. Sit down sweetie, we have to talk about this like mature adults.” His Mom was still seated, her hand now resting to where Lucas previously was. He was fuming! Talking about things like mature adults is easy to say when you’re not about to have one of the foundational elements of being a big kid taken away from you! “Lucas, we love you very much. We always want what is best for you. Look, we aren’t trying to take this away from you overnight.” His Mom shot his Dad a look. “Er, rather, what I mean to say, is that we aren’t trying to surprise you with this. That’s why we’re having this meeting. So we can talk.” Lucas looked from parent to parent. He crossed his arms and backed away from them, leaning against his old dresser. He would listen to them, but he was guarded. He was frowning and he felt tears welling in his eyes, but he kept his composure. Now was not the time for a temper tantrum. Now was the time to be the most mature person in the room. “O-ok.” This throat caught on the first word out of his mouth. Keep it together, keep it together. “Fine. Explain this to me.” The tension in the room was clear. These kinds of situations went from being just talking to just shouting in an instant, in his experience. His Mom spoke first. “We want to see if some positive reinforcement might help you with your accidents. I know it’s hard to keep track during the day when you’re going to the bathroom, so we have a chart that will help everyone monitor the situation, ok? Adults use charts like this all the time when they want to track things and they can’t remember them very well.” “So you wanna… have a chart for when I go to the potty? What’s that gonna do?” “Do you remember when I went on that diet last year?” His Dad explained. “I kept that app on my phone that tracked all the food I ate.” Lucas definitely remembered. It looked like a pain to do. “Well, it helped me watch what I was eating. I figured out that I was snacking between meals without even thinking about it. By writing it down, I was forced to remember what happened during the day. And it held me accountable.” “It’s exactly like that, sweetie. By keeping track of when you go to use the bathroom, you won’t forget about it. And it will make it easier to monitor your accidents.” Lucas had to admit that while he didn’t mind having peepee accidents in his pants, he could imagine it being inconvenient or inappropriate sometimes. And to his knowledge, most high schoolers didn’t have issues with wetting their pants in front of the potty. And their plan sounded fair. Dad definitely used that app and tracked his diet for a couple of months last year and that seemed to help. Although that did raise an obvious question. “Ok, well, if that system works so well, how come you aren’t using that app to track your food anymore, Dad?” His father’s eyes widened and he gave an awkward smirk. “That’s a good question, Ron. Why DID you stop using that app?” “I uh… well, it was quarter end and uh… There were some… Well you see, what had happened was…” “Lucas, you have raised an excellent point. It isn’t fair to you if we use a method that we can’t use ourselves.” His Mom was looking straight at his Dad while she spoke. “I think to prove that we are being open and equitable, while you are keeping track of your bathroom record, your father can keep track of the food he eats.” His Dad looked like he wanted to say something, but he elected not to. He just nodded in agreement, instead. Lucas supposed that their compromise was fair. If it turned out that this was going to be not worthwhile, at least he wouldn’t have to suffer alone. Much like making things even with his little brother, it was fair as long as everyone was inconvenienced. “Fine. I guess that makes sense.” He still wasn’t happy that this was being tracked. He was a big boy and he could go potty all on his own without having to record it. But, if they were going to record it, he would make sure it was a record of victory and success! “Good then, I’m glad we’re in agreement. Let me show you what we have.” His Mom went out to the doorway of the room and grabbed a box with a few items in it. She produced a vinyl chart with segments and spaces to put stickers and… at the top it said Potty Chart! This was identical to the potty training chart he saw on Noah’s wall yesterday! “So this is the chart. It will help you to-” “Yeah! I saw that! Mrs. Seong had Noah put a smiley sticker on it when he wet his training pants!” He paused. He blinked. Something didn’t click. Why would you put a smiley sticker on a potty training chart if you didn’t make it to the potty? “Wh… Why did… But Noah… went peepee…” His head swam. Something wasn’t connecting in his mind. It made sense to put a smiley face sticker on a potty training chart. It would feel good to put a smiley face sticker on a potty training chart. Smiley faces were good and showed that you did the right thing. That made sense. He wanted smiley face stickers on his potty training chart. But why would the good stickers go on when Noah had a big peepee accident? Wouldn’t he… get a frowny sticker? Yet, that logic was like a gear grinding without lubrication. It was barely turning and overheating. “I think you might be getting swept up in the details, champ.” His Dad’s hand was on his shoulder. When did he stand up? Lucas must have been so caught up in his own head that he spiraled out for a moment. “There’s a system that we’re supposed to follow. It sounds like Mrs. Seong is using the same one that we’re using. I promise, it’s not complicated.” It felt good to have his Dad there to reassure him. Lucas nodded and composed himself. His mother explained the system. Whenever Lucas had an accident in his pants, at all, he would put a smiley face on the chart in the part of the day when it happened. The smiley face was supposed to represent that it was alright and to stay positive. And if you made it to the potty on time and with no accident, you put a frowny face sticker on the chart. This represented that you overcame your fears of the potty monster and did the responsible thing. Apparently the frowny face was supposed to be more like a fearsome face. Lucas wasn’t sure he understood the logic of the way this worked. But it was just two stickers! He knew what they meant and that was the important part! He could keep track of them no problem. “See? Not hard at all. We all know what this means and we can keep track of it easily.” His Dad rubbed his shoulder and pulled him in for a big hug. Lucas hated to admit it, but he really needed that hug. The emotions in the last few minutes had been a lot more real than he was anticipating. “There’s a few more things, right Mom?” “Let’s see… Ah, just let me get this out and…” His mother pulled out a package containing some kind of folded up object. It was pretty big. She presented the front to him. “These are plastic sheets. I know that you just had a single bedwetting incident this morning, but we figured that if we were going to do this, we were going to do it right. Plus, look at how long it’s taken for your mattress to dry out.” She pulled off some of the towels. There was a faded yellow stain underneath, easily revealing where he had allowed his accident to soak in overnight. “This is purely so if anything happens, we don’t have to replace your mattress.” Lucas nodded. That made sense. If it took his mattress a long time to dry out, then it might still be wet when he went to bed. And that would be uncomfortable. He didn’t intend to wet the bed anymore, but… now that it was at the forefront of his mind, he realized that he didn’t have much control over whether he wet the bed or not. He could take steps to make sure he used the potty on time and remembered to pull down his pants and all that. But if he was asleep, he was pretty limited in what he could reasonably do. Plus, as he had experienced recently, he was sleeping extremely deeply. The mattress protector was a reasonable choice and didn’t threaten his ego at all. “Oh? No questions? Good!” His Mom placed the package down on the bed, presumably with the intent of getting it installed once the family meeting was over. “Now, the final thing we wanted to talk about. I think the surprise on this might have already been spoiled a bit thanks to Noah…” “WAIT. Oh my god! You… You got me training pants???” Lucas gasped, a great big smile forming on his face. As his mom raised up one of the pairs of padded undies, he was grinning from ear to ear. The training pants had blue trim and were covered with a pattern of airplanes doing loop-de-loops. The center flap was absent, which prevented it from being mistaken for cartoonish briefs. Instead, the center seemed to bulge out, clearly padded and thickened with layers of fabric meant to help absorb piddle. Lucas couldn’t help himself. He quickly stepped forward and put out his paws, his eyes wide with excitement. The training pants were handed to him and he lifted them up as if they were a sacred object, examining all their details and feeling the fabric. He pressed into the crotch and found it sprung back like a sponge. He let out a squeal of delight. He couldn’t put words to it, but when he saw Noah in undies just like these he wanted them so incredibly badly. He didn’t know how to describe it to his parents. In fact, in his mind he really hadn’t untangled the knot of desire himself. All he knew is that this was something he desperately wanted and now he had it. There was the sound of a cleared throat. Lucas looked up, his tail wagging behind him. Next to the mattress protector was a half-dozen other similar training pants. He gasped and looked at his Mom and then at his Dad. This felt like Christmas. Except on Christmas normally receiving underwear was one of the low points. “Really? Really? These are for me? I get to wear training pants? Oh my gosh oh my gosh…” Lucas heard his Dad say something as his wagging tail slapped into his father’s thigh at extreme speeds. “Oof. Yes. These are for you. We wanted you to feel confident while using the potty chart so we decided that…” His Dad didn’t have time to explain the rationale behind giving his fourteen year old son undies that were easier to pee in. Lucas gripped him in a big hug. Then his Mom. All the while he held onto the training pants with a death grip. “Thank you thank you thank you thank you!!!” “You’re very welcome, sweetie.” Lucas’ Mom spoke as her air was being squeezed out from the hug. He let up so he could examine the other training pants available to him. “If I knew you’d like them that much, we would have saved the potty chart for last.” “We had that whole big speech prepared and everything.” “At least he likes them.” Lucas was busy trying to figure out which one he was going to wear first. They were all great. There was one with little puppies and bones, one with baseball accessories, one with stars, one with whales, one with race cars, and one with fire trucks, cement mixers, and dump trucks. He immediately pulled down his pants and took his undies with them. His undies were a little damp. He had no clue and didn’t care at all. He picked up the training pants with baseball bats and gloves and stepped into them, sliding them up with relish. He threaded his tail through the hole in the back (which took effort thanks to his tail wagging) and felt his handiwork. He could not stop his body from involuntarily shuddering. The thickness of the cloth cradled his groin and kept him snug and secure. It was a noticeable amount of bulk but that wasn’t unpleasant. It was nice. It was a constant reminder of what he was wearing. He twisted and turned and examined himself. He padded over to the mirror and took a look. The teen wolf in front of the mirror was wearing an Envision Wyverns shirt and baseball training undies. And he had the biggest grin on his face. He felt good and right and at peace and happy. It was like he belonged in these. -- Martin didn’t look up from his game. He was in the middle of a special replay of the latest Pokemon game where he would discard any Pokemon of his that fainted. There were a couple of other rules surrounding this particular playthrough but the end result was that he cared a lot more about the health and survivability of his Pokemon. And it resulted in a couple weird situations where he ended up with a rag-tag band of Pokemon following a brutal fight. He liked taking notes about these kinds of things and posting them to Pokemon-dedicated message boards. “So uh, just in case you notice some changes with your brother, that is completely normal and is part of the process. It’s a stress-relief system and it’s going to help him excel in high school.” His Dad was standing awkwardly by him as his parents explained the situation with Lucas. It was pretty obvious what was going on. “Right, yeah, so he’s being unpotty trained?” His Dad bit his lip and paused for a moment before answering affirmatively. “Well, yes. It’s going to take a little bit longer but that’s the end goal. Did he talk to you about that?” “Oh, no, I don’t think he knows. I have a couple friends on the PokeForum who were unpotty trained recently. They talked about it and it sounded like what Lucas is going through.” Martin clicked his tongue as his Pokemon was struck with a critical hit at the worst possible time. It was annoying to lose a Pokemon that he had spent a lot of time leveling up and getting trained how he wanted. But that was part of the challenge. Without extra rules, these games could sometimes become too mindless. “PokeForum? Honey, we have talked about the dangers of talking to strangers online,” his Mom chidded. “You are really too young to be doing that.” Martin looked up from his game, gave his mother a side-eyed stare, blinked a few times, and then returned to his Switch. He wasn’t the one who had taken his Mom’s credit card to buy G-Bucks for Double Week. Or the one who had gotten a virus on his Dad’s laptop. Or the one who had been caught posting “skit” videos on ChikChok. Martin was firmly in his lane in the digital landscape and his parents knew it. Plus, he was going into the 7th grade next year. Lucas wasn’t the only “big boy” in the house. “Anyways, you have some… acquaintances who have gone through this?” His Dad changed the direction of the conversation. His parents were acting weird about all this. It was like they were asking for his approval or something. “Yeah. They seemed to like it. I guess they’re in diapers now.” He made his way back to the PokeCenter to reconfigure his team. “And… You don’t have a problem with it?” His Dad really was being timid. “They’re just diapers! You know, Huggies makes Pokemon diapers? They have Pokeballs and Pikachus on them. I don’t see what the big deal is.” He tossed out the retired Pokemon and replaced it with one of the recently caught monsters that he kept as a backup. Thankfully it was near the level of the defeated one. “Sweetie, if your brother ends up in diapers, would that be an issue? We want to make sure that this wouldn’t hurt your relationship.” Martin actually put the Switch down and looked up at his parents. They were standing over him. He was bad at reading faces. He took a moment to think about how he felt about Lucas. He loved his brother, at times. But he had also been turning into a real jerk. And it seemed like they had been growing distant ever since they each got their own rooms. Martin liked the privacy and he wasn’t begging for his brother to move back in with him or anything. But they lived together and it was nice when they got along. So far, since his parents started this unpotty training program, they had gotten along great. It was weird to flush the toilet after this brother used it, but it felt kind of powerful to have that amount of impact over someone else’s life. Lucas needed him for something really embarrassing and intimate and Martin felt like he was obligated to help. And when they were just hanging out they actually talked and weren’t arguing as much. It was nice. If Lucas would remain like that after being put back in diapers, then there was very little to lose. “Yeah, I think it’ll be fine. I don’t mind if Lucas gets unpotty trained.” He noticed the tension in the air dissipate and he was finally able to return to his game. -- The following day was a curveball for Lucas. He awoke in completely drenched sheets. The plastic mattress protector had done its job and kept the pee from soaking into the mattress, but they had also prevented the liquid from pooling. Instead, it spread out, resulting in basically his entire bed being stained from head to toe. Mattresses, it seemed, were better at absorbing moisture than bedsheets. The training pants put up a valiant effort, clearly having gained significant weight from the amount they had soaked up. They clung to his crotch in a way that was surprisingly pleasant. Unlike his normal undies, they seemed to retain some of his body heat, resulting in a tepid sensation that was more comfortable than how wet boxers felt. Putting the first smiley face on the potty chart was something of a challenge as well. Lucas knew from the discussion the previous night that the smiling stickers represented a can-do attitude and were supposed to motivate him to make it to the bathroom on time. It still felt bizarre to put a happy, positive indicator on a sheet that effectively showed that he failed in the task at hand. Yet, as he stood there in his soaked training pants, looking at the potty chart area marked “Nighttime”, it felt really good to have a nice smiling image in front of him. In fact, it made him smile. It felt good to have a happy sticker on the board! And as he examined himself in the mirror, noting how his drooping training pants looked on him, he could not stop his tail from wagging. He knew, logically, that he was supposed to be making it to the potty and NOT just going in his pants whenever he wanted. But the raw physical and emotional appeal was difficult to argue with. He spent a lot of the day hanging out with Martin. They had found a game that they could both play together: Quarryconstruct. The cube-based building and survival game could be played at the same time cooperatively. And the two of them set to work making an epic base out of a mountain, complete with lava flows behind glass and numerous entrances to underground shafts and even monster-filled areas. Lucas was primarily interested in exploring and linking routes and mapping things out, while Martin cared about refining the designs and creating efficient pathways and expanding the technology available. The day had gone by in a flash. And by the time their parents had come home, the mountain lair was taking shape and becoming a proper base of operations for their endeavors. Lucas invited Noah to come play with them, but he said he wasn’t feeling well. Unfortunately for Lucas’ plans to conquer his potty problems, he ended up having two big accidents before dinner, resulting in two new smiling stickers joining the one from that morning. The teen wolf hadn’t even managed to try to make it in either case. He was so engrossed playing his games that his body just gave up and let loose. Whatever signal his bladder had given his brain that an accident was incoming was completely ignored. It was a real shock for the wolf when he felt the warmth spreading out under him in his chair. He would whine and huff and, for some reason, complain out loud. “Uh-oh! I’m going peepee in my pants! I’m having a big accident and I can’t hold it!” He would shove his hands down, as if that could possibly affect the torrent of pee flowing into his training pants and shorts. After a few moments, his bladder would finally empty and he would sigh in relief. He barely even registered that he said anything out loud. It was an automatic response to the phenomena of his body releasing without his knowledge and his ears were mute to the words. That kind of reflexive action was becoming common for Lucas and whatever part of him that governed self-awareness was clearly on summer vacation as well. This happened to him twice. The most bizarre part about it all was that Martin would have to be the one to press Lucas about the accident. Previously, Lucas was very proactive about changing his clothes and making sure that he had the proper help needed or told someone that the potty needed to be flushed. But these new accidents came with a kind of mental blank following them. Lucas would go back to doing whatever it was that he was previously doing like nothing happened, like he wasn’t sitting in pee-soaked training pants on a drenched towel. It would take his brother to ask him if he had just wet his pants to jog his memory of the event. Lucas was grateful that Martin was so attentive about these things. For some reason, it felt like peeing his pants was just a normal event. He knew that accidents were normal. That everyone had accidents. That it was no big deal to have a big accident in his pants. That it was good to tell everyone when he had accidents. That it was fun to wet his pants. That good boys wet their pants and hated the potty. But even with all of those baseline, concrete mental establishments, it was odd to get used to this new normal. It helped a lot having his brother around to make sure that he was paying attention and not getting carried away. The oddest, most out of character part, was how proud he was to show off his potty chart to his parents that evening. Despite the enormous fuss over having it put into his room, despite the explanation that he was potty trained and didn’t need this, despite the angst over the implications it brought with it. Despite all of that, when he saw those smiling stickers that he put on there from earlier that day, he could not help himself from smiling along with them. His parents seemed understanding, happy even, about this. Clearly they were just impressed with the teen’s maturity and honesty. -- “C’mon Lucas, let’s go grocery shopping.” Carmella had made grocery shopping an evening task. She found that she was less likely to buy junkfood (or to be convinced by her boys, husband included, to buy junkfood) if everyone’s stomach was full from dinner. It also helped her with her busy schedule. Having to get dinner on the table for her family in a reasonable time meant that she didn’t have the luxury of picking things up on the way back from work. And finding the energy to go shopping for basic necessities on the weekend was not always possible. “Huh?” Her teen son clearly heard her. He had such selective hearing sometimes. He knew she was calling for him. His door was right there. All he had to do was pause his game and walk ten feet and he could have a normal conversation. But no, she’d have to do this the hard way. “I said, we’re going grocery shopping!” “What?” For the love of… That boy was leaving his room, whether he liked it or not. Carmella cared deeply about her children but sometimes they could be real recluses. Oh all their friends are online, yes, she was well-aware. Her friends were online too. But food wasn’t online! Out of all the possible things, it was the one physical connection that could never be replaced with virtual reality. She made her way up the stairs. She wasn’t upset, she just wanted her son to come with her. “Lucas, sweetie, I said that we are going to the grocery store. You and me. C’mon, pause it and let’s go.” Her son groaned and was clearly moments away from complaining that it was impossible to pause online games. “You will have plenty of time to fix your score when you get back.” She sniffed the air. There was a strong scent of stale urine. His room basically had that smell all the time now. They were four days into the potty chart and there wasn’t a single frowny face on it. Lucas had been using his pants exclusively, which meant he also had some poopy training pants incidents. That had been a new development, but not unexpected. Any frustration and fussiness over the much more substantial accident faded as soon as the sticker was placed on the chart. That was clearly working as-intended. She would have to invest in some air fresheners for his room. And hopefully an odor-resistant diaper pail in a short time. “Sweetie,” she tried a different tactic. “Does your potty chart need a new sticker?” That seemed to give her teen pause. She saw his character stop moving as he took one paw off the control stick and placed it on his crotch. He quickly apologized to his teammates that he would have to leave early. There were some sounds of complaints on the other end as he exited to the home screen of his console. “Mom! I went peepee in my pants like a LOT! I totally forgot to tell you about it. Can I please put a sticker on my chart?” He had hopped up and was obviously in saturated pants. And they clearly had been this way for a while, as the edges had begun to dry, staining the outside with obviously discolored tide marks. “Did you already put a sticker on the chart for this accident?” Carmella asked, hand on her hip. Yes, she had to go grocery shopping. But her dang son was just so endearing this way. If she wasn’t going to enjoy interacting with her kid, what was the point of being a parent? “No! I promise! I didn’t realize I had to go and I kinda just forgot until you mentioned it!” His tail was tucked between his legs. It was tough for a wolf to lie about their emotions when they had an indicator that was highly visible and totally out of their control. “Ok, go put your sticker on and get changed into clean pants. I’m grabbing my purse. I want you in the minivan in just a few minutes, ok?” The grin from her son as he was carefully aligning the new sticker on his chart, the wagging of his tail, the sheer joy he was getting from such a simple task, was all too much for Carmella. It reminded her of when she initially potty trained Lucas. Except this time was far, far, far easier. That child had been absolutely terrified of the toilet and convincing him to get out of diapers was no small feat. Maybe, in a way, she had actually forced him out of diapers too soon. Maybe this was an opportunity to correct that mistake and allow Lucas to regain that agency over himself. It was such a basic mark of maturity that perhaps wasn’t healthy to impose. She had heard of other cultures where they breastfed their children into their teens. She had heard of all sorts of unique methods for child-rearing. Maybe she had given into societal pressures for her own sake rather than for the sake of her… She was getting way too carried away in her head again. Carmella exited her son’s room, noting that his “fresh” training pants were already yellowed from repeated use. -- Lucas trudged alongside the cart, weary of this necessary process. He had agreed to come with his Mom, but he hadn’t agreed to exist in this space doing the most boring things imaginable. Lucas was no chef, and as such, he had no way to comprehend what all the random ingredients he was picking up were to be used for. Did the brand of artichoke hearts really matter? According to his Mom it did. She had a checklist on her phone and would also be struck with random moments of inspiration, requiring the wolf to trek all over the store to find some highly-specific ingredient. Far too often, he picked the wrong thing or the wrong version of the thing or the wrong size of the thing. Meaning he would have to make the return trip through the labyrinthine grocery store to find where he even initially located it in the first place. One such trip to pick up paper towels (“No, sweetie, I want the one with the burly bear lumberjack”) had taken him to the mysterious non-food aisles of the grocery store. These poorly-understood rows always housed the most random assortment of household goods available on the market. Was there really a need for two dozen shelves of clothing detergent? What about the forty-pound bags of birdseed? Did… Jake find that weird? He was a raven after all and… Lucas turned the corner and caught a glimpse of a wall of products that halted him in his tracks. In front of him were stacks and stacks and stacks of diaper packages. These were huge, boxy, plastic-coated containers, showing the faint outline of their folded contents as the taut packaging contoured around the edges. Huggies Ultra-Supremes for Teens? Teen Pampers SuperCruisers? Luvs Teens Leakguard Pro Series? Lucas was entranced. These large cases of diapers were all marketed for teens and young adults. They had pictures of other people his age proudly showing off their diapered status. They were smiling and posing and happy to be swaddled in these thick diapers that they were obviously wearing. It was incredible. They all boasted that they had the maximum absorbency, that they were perfect for teens who needed extra protection, that they fit just his size. He set the rolls of paper towels on the epoxy-coated floor and walked over to the display. There were dozens of these diaper bags all lined up perfectly on the shelves. Their own section marked “Young Adult Incontinence Supplies”. Right next to the diapers meant for babies and children. It was wild to see and also somewhat normal. Like they weren’t stacked up with some kind of fanfare or giant signage or other things that made them stick out. It was just like any other section of the grocery store; products being sold and marketed towards people interested in them. He saw the outlines of the diapers bulging the plastic of the packages. They were clearly lined up tightly inside, perfectly aligned. They were huge compared to the baby diapers. The teen stepped forward and studied the designs. They were all so similar and yet each had their own specific color and marketing style. He reached out and grabbed at the Huggies package, sliding it out and rotating it. It was heavy, at least several pounds. The diapers inside must have been weighty and bulky, because the coating around them was extremely thin. Easy to open. Easy to just rip open and take a look. Lucas studied the sides. They were much like the front, showing off a teenage sabertooth cat in a different pose than the front. On the front he was confident and smiling. On the sides he was leaning against an invisible wall and looking content. The back was filled out with more information about the diapers, showing them unfolded with arrows pointing to the various features. Elastic backing for extra fitted comfort, triple-reinforced leak-guards for maximum protection for leaks, a layered central core for quick absorption, 10,000ml liquid capacity, reinforced diaperfront for enhanced playtime comfort, high-strength tapes to prevent sagging. It was incredible the amount of engineering that had gone into this. The blurb on the back talked about how Huggies Ultra-Supremes for Teens was the premier diaper for teens and young adults, using state-of-the-art technology to ensure convenience and comfort for today’s on-the-go youth. That these diapers were designed to be extremely comfortable to wear while sacrificing none of the patented Huggies Leak-Lock features that parents have known and valued. The wolf’s heart was racing as he read all about this. His breathing was quickened. He had no idea why this was all so fascinating to him. A few weeks ago and he would have walked past without even noticing. Or if he had noticed he would have assumed it was meant for some other demographic than himself. But reading all of this and feeling the dense package filled to the brim with diapers was beyond engrossing to him. He had to know what they looked like. Were they really like what the back of the packaging showed? Did they really look like how they looked on that sabertooth cat on the front? He had to know. The teen looked up and down the aisle. He checked up at the ceiling for cameras. If there were any he couldn’t see them. He was alone in this spot and no one would be the wiser if he decided to take a peek inside the box. He just wanted to look, that was all. He slid the box off the shelf. It really was heavy for its size, at least a foot and a half on all sides and several pounds. There was a handle at the top that he could hold onto. It would make it so much easier to carry this around the store. Assuming, of course, that he had any reason to do so. He didn’t want to take these diapers to his Mom and have her purchase them and then wear them. No, that was… That wasn’t what he… He held the box awkwardly positioned against the shelf, holding it in both arms, just staring at it. The boy on the front looked so happy. He looked so cool and confident in diapers. He looked normal in diapers. He was wearing them between his legs as if they were underwear and he wasn’t making a big deal about them. They were just what he wore instead of undies. He wore diapers. He wasn’t potty trained and he needed diapers so of course he wore diapers. That’s why these diapers even existed. They existed because it was perfectly fine for teens like this cat and like Lucas to wear diapers. They wouldn’t make diapers this big and designed exactly for people like him if it wasn’t perfectly natural to wear them instead of undies. Instead of training pants. He slowly placed the box on the floor and took another look around the aisle. He pulled at the corner flap where the handle was, unsealing it. He then tugged again and again, making an opening at the end of the package. The smell that greeted him was unreal. These diapers were pleasantly scented with lavender. It was a clean, simple smell that was noticeable but not overpowering. It gave the product a luxurious quality in his eyes (or nose). Like they didn’t need to make the diapers smell this enjoyable, this… welcoming. His paws were shaking as he reached for one of the diapers in the package. He couldn’t explain himself. Why was he so anxious and excited about this? Why was this such a big deal? Why was he even doing this in the first place? What could have possibly spurred on this total random fascination that would warrant opening a package of… Before his mind could race to the next thought his fingers were around the edge of the white diaper. The plastic outer layer felt smooth and had a satisfying give to it. He pulled it out, taking care as it was lodged in the package. These were clearly pressed together and were given no room to breathe or expand. The loud rustling of the plastic bag followed his movements. After some wiggling he finally produced it. He was holding the folded up, rectangular form of a diaper exactly in his size. Lucas studied it, feeling the length of the material. The thin layer of plastic encasing the thick absorbent layer of padding underneath. The tactile experience was unlike anything else he could remember. It was both supple and strong, clearly engineered so that it did not feel fragile or rough. The sound it made as he rotated it and felt it up was exquisite. A subtle crinkle and rustle that was intoxicating to listen to. All along it were patterns, showing space ships and moons and astronauts, with a panel of a smiling sun with smiling planets orbiting on the front panel. It reminded Lucas of the smiling stickers on his potty chart. It was inviting and friendly and it really reinforced to him that it was perfectly fine to wear diapers. Just like the smiling stickers made him feel good about going potty in his pants, the smiling planets on this diaper made him feel less wary about his decision to open up the package and take a look. “Sweetie, would you like to tell me what you’re doing?” Lucas felt his body tense up and in one instinctive motion, his hands chucked the diaper away from him. It thudded across the grocery store, landing in the open refrigerated dairy products aisle. Lucas’ heart was pounding in his chest. What the FUCK was he doing? What WAS he doing? He was just looking at DIAPERS and what the actual fuck. How was he supposed to explain that? That wasn’t something that he was known for or that he could just handwave away. He had a big package of Huggies right in front of him and it was open and his Mom probably saw him fondling this thing and wow he was basically dead. Maybe he could just pass away right here and they would ignore this part of his life in his obituary. Like they can’t just put in “died of embarrassment because he was caught opening DIAPERS” in the memorial of you right??? “Sweetie, c’mon, I’m right here. Mommy’s right here. It’s ok, you can tell me what’s going on.” He caught the glimpse of his Mom out of the corner of his eye, leaning down next to him. “Oh, are these some of those teen diapers? I’ve been seeing those around.” Lucas was frozen stiff. “Hm. Lucas, did you open this package of diapers?” Air escaped from his chest as he vainly attempted to form words. “Sweetie, it’s ok if you did, but you have to tell me.” Lucas was at the point where there were so many thoughts in his mind all competing for attention that he felt no dominant thought. It was like having a blank mind, except it resulted from having hundreds of thoughts all trying to bust through the door at the same time, jamming it in place. One of those thoughts happened to be that Lucas needed to go potty. “Lucas, it’s alright if you opened these diapers. It’s perfectly normal to be curious about diapers, especially since it sounds like a lot of teens are wearing them and… Oh. Uh-oh. Oh sweetie…” Lucas looked at his Mom with a dumb expression and then looked down. From his squatting position he could see in full view that a puddle was forming on the ground beneath him. Piss was streaming down his shorts in rivulets, dripping onto the floor and pooling around his feet. His training pants were trying their very best to keep the accident contained but there was a serious limit to their ability to stop such a massive flood. Worse still, his tail flagged. His eyes closed and he felt his stomach tighten. He was in the perfect position to completely lose control over himself. The back of his training pants bulged and sagged as he pushed out a massive mess into their seat. When he opened his eyes, he saw his Mom looking down at him, her face a gentle mask showing concern and affection in equal measures. He had seen that face a lot recently. He frowned as he looked up to her. “Mom, I had a big accident in my pants. I went potty lots and lots in my pants.” He was on the verge of breaking down. He had just had an extremely public and humiliating accident. There was no way to hide this. They still had an entire store to walk through. Everyone could easily see and smell that he had just peed and pooped in his pants and there was nothing he could do about that. His Mom smiled with a practiced gentle grace. “That’s right. You sure did sweetie. And you know what that means, right?” She crouched down to his level and looked him in the eyes. “It means that when we get home, you get to put a big, smiley sticker on your potty chart! Won’t that be fun? Won’t that be nice to have a happy face on your potty chart?” Lucas genuinely could not help himself. His tail moved of its own accord and the doom and gloom and misery he was just beginning to wallow in was instantly replaced with the sheer joy and excitement associated with putting a big happy sticker on his chart showing off how many accidents he was having. It felt really, really good to put those stickers on to mark his progress! And that meant that having a big accident in his pants was a good thing! It wasn’t a bad thing to go potty in his pants because he was supposed to have lots and lots of accidents in his pants! The stickers were smiling and happy and that meant that HE should be smiling and happy when he used them! “Really?? I get to put a sticker on it???” His Mom nodded and that was all it took to bring the teen up to his feet despite his sodden pants. “Now, sweetie, I’m going to ask you to do me a big favor. Can you do that for me, big boy?” Lucas eagerly nodded his head. He could absolutely help out! “I want you to go grab that diaper you tossed over there and bring it back. We need to clean up your accident before we leave.” The teen carefully stepped out of the puddle and squeaked his way over to the open dairy aisle. He didn’t mind that it was painfully obvious that his pants were completely ruined by this accident or that he desperately needed to get changed. He had been put into a remarkably good mood despite all of that and he was doing a task for his Mom. That kind of one-mindedness really helped ensure that he stayed on target. He grabbed the Huggies diaper that he had flung onto some yogurt containers. It had flopped open. He brought it back in both hands, awkwardly waddling thanks to his accident. With an expertise that implied that cleaning up random spills with spare diapers was not infrequent, Lucas’ Mom mopped up the puddle to the best of her ability. She balled the diaper up and stuffed it into her purse. She looked at Lucas, then back down to the Huggies on the ground. “Alright sweetie, go put the Huggies in the cart.” “Huh? But I-” “Sweetie, you know that if you open something in the store, you have to pay for it. C’mon, no arguing, we have to finish shopping.” The teen sighed in a way indicated a kind of defeat unique to teens. A huffy, resigned, annoyed sigh. But he did as she asked. Thankfully there were precious few items left to purchase on their trip. Lucas spent the entirety of the time side-eying the diapers that were now in the bottom of the shopping cart. He just couldn’t take his eyes off them for some reason. When it came time to check out, Lucas’ Mom sent him off ahead so he wouldn’t bother any of the customers in line. He waited out by the minivan, casually browsing on his phone. It was really interesting how once he distracted himself, he barely even noticed that he had pottied in his pants big time. He messaged Noah on Tumult. Noah responded quickly and seemed much more talkative than he had been in previous days. That was nice. Lucas would have to see if they could hang out later, not that he was in better spirits. When Lucas’ Mom arrived with the cart, he noticed that she had the Huggies box completely open and on display for anyone who looked. He blushed as he saw that there was nothing to hide these embarrassing things. It almost made it look like these were for him! Lucas was also surprised to find that he was instructed to help load the car into the back passenger seats, rather than the spacious minivan trunk. It wasn’t that crazy or unusual, just kind of odd. “Ok sweetie, go put the cart away.” Lucas waddled off, his pants now cold and clammy against his legs and decidedly less comfortable to walk around in than they had been earlier. When he returned, the trunk door was open and the seats had been laid down. The Huggies from earlier were sitting there, along with several empty trash bags and a few other items Lucas couldn’t make out. “Good boy. Alright sweetie, I was thinking about this while I was in line. I don’t want you sitting on the upholstery in poopy pants. And I don’t think YOU want to sit there in poopy pants, do you?” Lucas shook his head. This was getting pretty frustrating and weird to be in. “So I’m going to change you.” The teen’s eyes went wide as he realized why the diapers were out in the open in the back of the car. Lucas went to speak up, to defend his maturity, to vehemently deny that he needed to be put back into diapers. Before he could even get a word out his Mom held up a finger, giving him a dead-serious face. “You opened this package of diapers in the store. You made me purchase them by doing so. I didn’t want to buy these. So, mister, since I happened to do something exceptionally nice for a boy who was prepared to ruin property that wasn’t his, YOU have to do something nice for me.” Lucas hung on her words. He was ashamed. It was true. He had totally just taken something that didn’t belong to him and opened it without even asking for permission and without thinking of the consequences. He wasn’t quite a thief, but he was certainly not acting like the kind of good boy who got smiley face stickers. “I’m getting you changed into these for the ride home and that’s final, understood?” The teen looked down, feeling just awful about himself. He had really messed this whole thing up and he was extremely fortunate that he was only being subjected to this, rather than a more intense punishment. He followed his mother’s instructions and undid his pants, taking them off awkwardly with his shoes still on. He shivered nervously as he stood there in the parking lot. The sun was setting late. Thankfully most people did not do their shopping this late, but it was an awfully public space to be standing in poopy underwear. His Mom bagged up the pants and motioned for him to lay down in the back of the minivan. It was a pretty strange experience having his dirty undies changed this way. His mother was so casual about it. She moved with practiced precision and quickly cleaned him, using some baby wipes previously hidden behind the package of diapers. Lucas had his face covered the entire time with his hands. He felt the ordeal and the ordeal was cold and odd and also comforting and personal. He heard a diaper being removed from the package, the loud rustling of the plastic coating immediately giving it away. He whimpered as he was instructed to lift his tush up, and was greeted with the smell of fresh baby powder, a unique and pleasant smell that made him oddly nostalgic. Before he even realized, his thigh was lightly slapped by his Mom a few times and she told him to get up. Lucas moved the hands from his face and blinked. The sky was a lot darker and the lights from the parking lot were the primary source of illumination now. He jumped up and looked down at himself. He twisted around, examining how he looked from every angle. He was so emotionally frazzled from the events of tonight that he wasn’t sure how to feel. On the one hand, he was wearing a diaper, which was the ultimate sign of potty failure, and certainly something he was hoping to avoid. It was too unbelievably embarrassing and ego destructive to even think about the possibility of ending up back in diapers. And yet, as he inspected himself, he couldn’t help but feel somehow, improbably, complete. Like this was some sort of missing piece of himself that he was totally unaware of. And now that he was wearing the diaper, which fit snugly and comfortably around him, he was a total person, a complete package. Lucas grabbed his Mom into a great, big, hug, and she returned it with the same intensity. Lucas wasn’t sure why he felt this way. And he couldn’t possibly begin to untangle his feelings in this parking lot. But it felt good to hug his Mom and it felt good to be in clean undies, even if those undies happened to be diapers. -- The car ride home was quiet. Lucas stared out of the window, letting his mind wander as the streetlights passed by. He was trying to think, trying to center his thoughts and form a concrete mental chain, but he found himself drifting from idea to idea. Never anything substantial, just thoughts that came and passed with little fanfare. He noted that the diaper hugged his bottom in a pleasing way. He would have figured it would be uncomfortable to sit in since it lifted up part of him, but instead it was a very comfortable and familiar feeling, remarkably similar to the sensation of sitting in his training pants. He was still concerned that his Mom was mad at him for opening the diapers and causing a fuss for her at the store. But it wasn’t the right time to have that discussion. When they pulled into the driveway, Lucas didn’t even think twice about hopping out and helping with the groceries. He paid no mind to his pantsless state. It genuinely didn’t even cross his thoughts that he was showing off his diapered butt to the entire neighborhood. Maybe it was just his desire to assist his Mom following the events of the grocery store. Maybe it was something else. But he barely even noticed that he was thickly padded in his Huggies, totally exposed. The slight waddle in his step as he carried armfuls of reusable grocery bags was the only thing that came to mind. He walked a little bow-legged, wiggling his butt as he moved. It was taking a little bit to get used to. Not that he wanted to get used to walking around in diapers. “Lucas, sweetie, thank you for helping me put the groceries away.” It had gone by in such a flash and Lucas was so busy in his own head that he felt like he had no memories of even unpacking the groceries. “There you two are! Do you need any help with… Oh. Uh. I see that we’re going without pants tonight, huh?” Lucas’ Dad always seemed to miss out on putting away the food. Just barely missing or arriving just in time to help with the final and most minor of items. It had become a running joke in the family and it seemed he was perfectly happy with those minimal expectations. He leaned against one of the door frames into the kitchen. “Lucas had a ‘big accident’”-his Mom made air quotes with her fingers-”at the grocery store. And he also opened up a package of Huggies without telling me. So I decided to change him in the backseat.” His Mom sounded tired, done. Lucas looked down with shame. “I see. Well, that explains what he’s wearing… Lucas, it sounds like you owe your mother an apology. You know that you have to ask permission before you take things at the store.” His Dad sounded abnormally calm about the situation. But he was still correct. “I’m sorry Mom. I… didn’t mean to cause you any trouble. I don’t know why I opened them up.” “Sweetie, it’s perfectly normal for teens to be curious about diapers.” The teen wolf looked up at his Mom. She had a smile on her face that reminded him of the gentle look she gave him at the store. It was a warm and understanding look. “W-what? It is?” Lucas wasn’t sure how to take this information. His brain still felt fuzzy and clouded. Things were happening and he wasn’t sure how to process them. “Your mother is right. There’s a lot of research showing that teens can be more successful at school if they are diapered. Plus I’m sure you’ve seen all those commercials. It’s only natural that you would be curious.” Lucas blinked as he looked from parent to parent. It was true that he had seen commercials showing off teens wearing diapers. But… wait, he had? Yes, he absolutely had. They popped up a lot when he watched WeChannel. And they showed up on the television in commercial breaks between shows. Over the past several weeks he had seen them and had, for some reason, just totally ignored them. It was like his mind glossed over the fact that he had witnessed dozens of these advertisements showing off people his age perfectly happy in diapers. Wearing diapers and explaining that diapers helped them. Making it seem totally normal and pedestrian to wear Pampers or Huggies. It was so weird that he had completely missed the purpose of these commercials. It was like he blanked when they came on. But now that his Dad mentioned it, he really had seen a lot of things lately indicating that it was perfectly natural for teens to wear diapers. It all rushed into his head at once, unpacking so many memories and fitting them onto a timeline that had previously been empty. He swayed in place, losing his footing for a moment as his mind caught up with the sudden explosion of recent memories he had completely taken for granted. He stumbled and caught himself against the door to the pantry. Both parents stepped forward but Lucas shook his head and steadied himself. His Dad was right! He really had seen a lot of commercials about wearing diapers lately. That must be why he was so curious about the package of Huggies from the store! He had seen a lot of ChikChoks talking about how commercials and media influenced consumers (ironically often coming from “influencers”). He had totally believed that he was unaffected by such things, but clearly that wasn’t true. “Wow… Gosh yeah. You’re right. I really have been seeing a lot of stuff about diapers lately.” He spoke with a newly gained confidence, with self-realization. “Yeah, I’m really sorry Mom. I should have talked with you about it. I shouldn’t have just opened up the box of diapers like that. That wasn’t right for me to do.” “Well, apology accepted.” There was an awkward pause as no one seemed certain of the next step to take. After a beat his Mom filled the void. “Go upstairs and put a sticker on your chart, big boy. And Lucas, how about you keep the diaper on for bedtime tonight.” Lucas had turned to rush up the stairs. He stopped, took a breath to say something, and thought better of it. He had gotten off extremely leniently from his parents and just had some really bizarre realizations about the kinds of media he had been consuming. Now wasn’t the time to push back. Besides, it was just a diaper. It wasn’t so bad being diapered. It was, really, kind of nice. -- Dreams. Dreams of nothing. Dreams of everything. Intense visions of infinite vast expanses perceived by insignificance. The stars above circled, their twinkling lights away in a distance so vast that it could not be comprehended. Multi-colored strips of brilliant illumination danced overhead. The aurora was its own mystery. Perhaps solved by someone, but its solution was less important than what it represented. The drive to solve that mystery, the drive to seek out the beautiful things of the world and understand them, commune with them, exist with them, preserve them. It wasn’t so much about the answer as it was about the journey to find the answer. Lucas sat, legs crossed on the edge of a cliff. Mountains in the distance broke up the vista. Their jagged and snow capped peaks seemed small from his vantage, but he knew that if he was closer that they would tower over him. So many things in the universe above and below. So many things to see and do, to learn and know. It was exciting. The new possibilities. He looked down. Vast primordial forests covered swaths of land that could never be crossed on foot. Winding rivers broke them apart into their own sections, creating natural divides of the landscape. The trees could grow for hundreds of years, hundreds of feet tall, carrying with them the wisdom of the ages. Their roots spread deep and wide, forming a tangled network of interconnections between all living things just beneath the surface of perception. The wisdom was not with age but with the community and relationships formed. Rocks crumbled to dust in the wake of their slow, relentless assault. Nothing could stop the solid foundation of those who existed together in harmony. He watched as the sun rose and set, a hundred times. A million times. The trees, they grew as tall as they could and eventually reached their end, collapsing onto the forest floor, only to disappear as they were consumed by the invisible mycorrhizal network that formed a symbioting web, its own community of hyphae and mycelium strands joining together just as the roots of the trees did. And from this death emerged new trees that grew to the same gargantuan, towering heights. As time passed the cyclical nature of all things bore truth. But the unity of the forest stood in defiance. Although one tree fell, the forest remained. And the forest could grow, no matter the changes. It filled Lucas with a deep contentment. The permanence of impermanent things. And he was a part of it. -- It might have actually been the best night of sleep Lucas had ever experienced. He opened his eyes, feeling refreshed and fulfilled in a profound way. He felt no tension in his body and his bed was the perfect temperature; just warm enough to be toasty. He stretched and yawned and opened his eyes and turned over to turn off his alarm. His plastic sheets rustled underneath. He grabbed the phone and scrolled through it casually, checking up on how social media had developed overnight. It was just really nice, lying there. In the back of his mind, he felt like he needed to do something. He felt like he was missing something. Something he had checked in the morning recently. Something that made him feel a mixture of emotions. Oh! He had to check to see if he could put on a smiley sticker on his potty chart for wetting the bed! That was so silly of him! The last several mornings it had been painfully obvious as he woke up in sopping wet sheets that reminded him of his condition the moment that he gained consciousness. Maybe he had just gotten used to waking up like that. Oh! Or maybe he actually had held it while he was sleeping and he could make it to the potty! That would be exciting! Lucas sat up and threw off his sheets, fully expecting to find them heavy and wet. They were dry. They were bone dry. They were completely unused and unstained. Instead, he found that the diaper he went to bed in was absolutely soaked and swollen from having absorbed an incredible amount of his overnight accidents. The teen gasped. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. His Huggies, previously with a variety of space-themed decals, were stained a light yellow, and the pictures all along the inner core were completely gone. Trace amounts of the ink faded around the edges as if it was being slowly washed away. Lucas put his paw onto the diaper and felt it squish under this touch. The diaper felt substantial. It felt like it had grown and expanded and swollen. The sensation of pressing against it was electric. It had a give to it. It flexed as he pressed into it. The absorbent material around his sensitive parts was unlike anything else he had ever felt. It was exciting and soothing in equal parts. And the sound that the plastic of the diaper made. It was even better than when he had held the diaper in his hands at the store. It responded to his touch with a subtle but noticeable crinkle. The plastic of his sheets along with it. It was like the ultimate physical stimulant. He couldn’t get enough. Both his hands were soon gripping his diaper. Groping and cupping and rubbing and squishing and feeling all over. He was laying in bed feeling his big soggy nighttime diaper and he really couldn’t have told anyone how long he was doing it for. It was like he was in his own world as he explored the Huggies diaper, wanting to experience every inch of it, wanting to learn as much as he could. Of course, the door to his bedroom opened in the middle of this fondling session. Lucas quickly grabbed one of the sheets and hastily covered himself as his Dad stood at the entrance to his room. “Hey champ, Mom made breakfast for the family. She’s got these little toast things with eggs in the center. They’re delicious.” “Th-thanks!” Lucas’ voice cracked. “I’ll… I’ll be down in just a minute.” “Oh, how did last night go? How was it sleeping in your Huggies?” “It… uh…” Should Lucas be honest that this was the most incredible experience of his life to wake up to? Would that be weird? Would it be weird to just blurt out that he really really really REALLY loved waking up in super soaky diapers and he loved rubbing and touching them? “I…er…” His Dad raised an eyebrow as Lucas struggled to come up with words to accurately explain how he felt without coming off way too strong. “Hm… Not easy to talk about, huh? How about this,” his Dad walked across the room (with unusual ease thanks to all of the laundry that Lucas had been doing lately) to the potty chart. He grabbed two stickers from the container and held them up. “If you didn’t like it, we can put a frowny face on the chart. And if you did like it, we can put a smiley face on the chart. No need to make this all complicated.” Before his Dad could even finish his sentence, Lucas, still clutching his sheet, pointed at the smiley face sticker. “This one?” The teen nodded. “So sleeping in a diaper felt good?” Lucas nodded again. “Good. Then we can put this up on your chart.” And with that the sticker was secured. Lucas didn’t know why but this whole experience made him feel small. He had, without realizing it, curled up with his knees to his chest and was holding his sheets tight against his chest. “Wanna come give me a big hug for your big sticker?” That was all it took to get Lucas hopping out of bed, his tail frantically fluttering behind him. He didn’t even notice how droopy his nighttime diaper had gotten. At the very least the Huggies promise for the tapes to remain secure seemed completely accurate. -- The next few days were weird for Lucas. He had made the switch to being diapered at night after a discussion with his parents. That discussion went far more calmly than the previous several potty-related ones. But he was still in his training undies during the day. It was under the guise of making it to the potty on time and trying to use the potty and yadda yadda yadda blah blah blah. Lucas found himself really just not caring in the slightest about that stated goal. If someone had asked him, he would have absolutely said that he was definitely interested in maintaining his potty trained status. But on the inside he was just daydreaming about diapers. He found himself loitering about in the house before taking his morning shower. Finding random things to do so he could justify staying in his nighttime diaper. It was soul-crushing to take off his Huggies and tug up his training pants. For whatever reason, that excitement and fun that the training pants had previously brought him was just gone and nowhere to be found. He found his accidents just as frequent as before, his potty chart now exclusively full of smiling stickers all indicating that it had been almost two weeks since the last time he actually went potty anywhere other than his pants. And these accidents seemed even more random and totally caught Lucas by surprise every time. When he did notice, usually because someone else in the family mentioned to him that he had soaky or stinky pants, internally he lamented that he had gone potty in his pants instead of his Huggies. HIS Huggies. That package from the store was HIS. He had diapers. He needed diapers. At night at least. But… maybe he really did need diapers? Maybe he was one of those teens that totally needed to be in super thick diapers all the time and who weren’t potty trained. Maybe… Thoughts like that wormed their way into his daily life and remained nestled in his head long after he had changed into clean, albeit stained, pants. It was a pleasant change of pace when Noah messaged him asking if he wanted to come over on Tumult. Lucas really missed being around his friends and despite how much he enjoyed lazing around playing video games with his brother, he desperately wanted to see his good friends again. Noah had really brightened up as they had been talking over the past several days. That angsty, moody spell that had awkwardly interrupted their last hangout seemed to have passed. In fact, Noah wanted Lucas to come over for a sleepover! Jake was also supposed to be coming back from his soccer camp and the three of them could actually be around each other again. It was exciting news! Lucas had everything packed up. He was within walking distance of his house, but it was always a drag to have to come back to grab something, especially if they planned on staying up late. He had clothes for the day (which in his case meant he had five pairs of training pants and shorts and one shirt), he had his Huggies Ultra-Supremes for Teens diaper for the night, he had baby powder, his phone charger, some baby wipes, his Ycube controller, some snacks, and his sleeping bag. It was enough to fill a book bag and duffle bag. This wasn’t his first sleepover at Noah’s house. They did it all the time as kids. It had become less common recently so this was a fun throwback to prepare everything. Lucas’ Mom was surprisingly fussy about the whole thing. She made sure his phone was charged and he had his parents’ numbers on it. She went over the time he was expected back home the following day. She grilled him to make sure no girls were invited and that they wouldn’t be sneaking out to any parties. She asked him three times if he had packed his nighttime diaper and even made him bring a second one just in case! She also apparently had talked with Noah’s mom about his situation. It should have been ridiculously embarrassing to have his Mom casually talking with other people about his need for protection at night. It should have riled him and caused his cheeks to blush. It should have caused the teen to bristle and push back against an obvious intrusion into a very private and delicate matter. Instead, Lucas felt nothing of the sort. It didn’t even cross his mind that it would be odd to tell someone he needed diapers at night. It was so matter-of-fact and sensible that it was just part of the normal conversation. The only reason why Lucas even noticed was because his Mom mentioned it several times, highlighting that when he needed to get changed into his diaper, he should talk with Mrs. Seong. Otherwise, it would have totally flown under his radar. Thankfully the grilling and over-parenting didn’t take too much time, and he made his way out to his friend’s house. The note about Mrs. Seong changing him was an important bit of information that the teen wolf had completely overlooked. So far, he had not changed his diapers on his own. His Mom and his Dad had been the ones putting him in the diaper. He could take it off, no problem. That was simple. But he really had not yet learned any of the strategies for getting padded himself. He wasn’t opposed to learning, but it took a lot of burden off of him to have help. Plus it seemed like a lot of the awkward measuring and positioning was easier when being done by a third party. So as long as they continued to offer it, Lucas saw no issue in continuing to remain ignorant. Noah answered the door with a big smile and a surprising hug. Lucas had hugged his friend in the past, but not normally for just arriving at the front door. Plus with his bags in his hands it wasn’t the best position for a hug. But it was still nice! Nothing wrong with a good hug among friends. “Dude I’m so glad to see you! I’ve really missed you!” Noah stepped aside and let Lucas in. “Haha, yeah I missed you too man. I wasn’t expecting the warm welcome, but I’ll take it.” Lucas set his bag down at the foot of the stairs and looked up, in the direction of Noah’s room. “Yeahhhh sorry I was such a downer before. I was going through some weird feelings and like you saw how everything was. It was just a tough time for me but I’m really feeling a lot better now!” “That’s really good to hear. I was worried I had made things awkward before when I was here…” “Nah dude you’re fine. It was totally on me. It actually means a lot that you showed up. I like talking on Tumult but it’s really different being in person, you know?” “Totally! I feel like I haven’t left the house in ages. I needed a change of scenery.” “Yeah I was pretty cooped up myself. Mom’s had me coming out with her for chores and stuff which is-” Noah closed his eyes and sighed. That wasn’t quite what Lucas was expecting from that sentence. “Um… which is nice. I mean they’re chores but it’s nice to get out and see things. I dunno why but it just feels kind of nice to be hanging out with my mom and seeing eye-to-eye on things for once.” “I feel you. I’m not trying to be weird about it, my parents are still my parents but it feels like we’re doing a lot better now than we were when I almost flunked science. Fuck I can’t believe I did that! It feels like forever ago.” Lucas tugged at his duffel bag straps. “Yeah I-Oh, yeah, lets get your stuff upstairs haha! Sorry we just haven’t talked in a while and I was getting carried away and uh, yeah!” Noah led the way up to his room. Lucas looked down to make sure he had everything, then looked up. He did a double-take. The seat of Noah’s pants were outlined with an extremely obvious bulge that was unmistakable. Noah was wearing something thick under his pants. And from the foot of the stairs, the wolf could easily pick up that whatever he was wearing was rustling and crinkling as he moved. He rushed up the stairs, his chest thumping like mad. There was no way. There was no way! Lucas had been in Noah’s room hundreds of times. He was intimately familiar with the layout. Multiple layouts even, as he had gone through various changes in decor over the years. Lucas was not expecting to find, next to the door, a waist-height wooden storage unit covered with a plastic-wrapped foam mat. The inside of the storage unit was filled with stacks and stacks of teen-sized diapers, baby powder, and baby wipes. Next to this changing table was a kind of garbage can that was propped open, which revealed a balled up diaper poking out of it. It was a diaper pail and it was so full of diapers that it couldn’t even close! Lucas sniffed the air. The room had an unmistakable nursery scent of dirty diapers, lotions, and baby powder. “Uhhhh hello?” Noah waved at the stunned wolf and gave him a quizzical expression. “DUDE!!! Are you… Are you back in diapers???” Lucas could barely get the words out. He was having so much difficulty processing what was going on. He knew cognitively that his friend was in training pants and was having lots of accidents and was scared of the potty monster. But he couldn’t have imagined that it was anything more than that! It was just a coincidence that the two teens were having the same kinds of issues at the same time. And it never would have occurred to Lucas to expect his best friend to be in diapers full-time. “Oh duh yeah, sorry I probably should have told you. Mom decided that I should be back in diapers.” Noah spoke like it was the most normal thing in the world to have his potty training taken away like that. “She… what?” “Dude, honestly it’s for the best. I’ve been spending so long playing pretend that I’m potty trained and ready for big boy undies and stuff and like, ugh it just was wearing on me. It’s really a lot better being back in diapers.” The fox untied the string holding up his shorts and slid them down, revealing a yellowed and swollen diaper. Lucas recognized them as Pampers SuperCruisers from the store! “Y… But…. Wh…. Wait, pretending? What do you mean you were pretending to be potty trained?” It was a ton of information for Lucas to take in at once and he was having difficulty absorbing it all. “Yeah, like, saying that I should be using the potty and going to the toilet and making a big deal about it. It was just pretending. I wasn’t REALLY ready for potty training. All the accidents that I was having was like… I dunno it felt like I was rejecting all the time I spent being in denial. That’s why I was so huffy and flustered last week.” Noah groped at the front of his diaper for a few seconds, then pulled his pants back up. “I was trying to fight myself and keep on pretending that I was really potty trained. I feel so much better now that I’m being honest about being unpotty trained.” Lucas was trying to piece things together. Some of what his friend said made sense. It was true that he was upset about his accidents and that clearly was affecting his mood. But pretending to be potty trained? Was that even possible? Surely if you were able to use the potty in time, you were potty trained, right? But all of those thoughts of confusion just melted away as he took a deep breath and inhaled that pervasive nursery scent of the room. The sweet scent of the talcum powder. The heavy, musty aroma of the used padding that leaked out of the diaper pail. The residue of leaks that had been allowed to dry and air out. The medical smells of creams and lotions. It all blended together in a beautiful, nostalgic, magical way. It was like a great, big reset on his thoughts. He was focusing on… something… that was confusing and upsetting him. And now, looking around his friend’s room, now modified to accommodate his unpotty trained state, it felt just as familiar and welcoming as it ever did in the past. Really, Lucas wanted this. He wanted THIS. He wanted his room to be like this. He was jealous! He was jealous that Noah was back in diapers! Lucas was having just as many accidents as his fox friend! His potty chart was full of happy, positive, smiling faces all indicating that he had totally failed to make it to the bathroom time and time and time again! That was absolute proof that Lucas was clearly not ready to be considered potty trained either! If Noah could be put back into diapers and never have to worry about that scary, terrible, awful potty monster, why couldn’t Lucas? “Helloooo? Earth to Lucas?” The wolf was snapped out of his thought spiral. “Dude you’re going peepee in your pants. Did you leak?” Lucas looked down and saw that a dark spot had formed along his thighs, dribbling down the insides of his pants before dripping onto the carpet. His training pants were doing an admirable job keeping the majority of the accident contained, but they had just not been enough to keep his pants dry. If he were at home, he wouldn’t have even bothered changing his pants from this accident, since it was so relatively minor compared to the absolute floods that he used to mark his potty chart with smiley faces. He would have stayed in his soaky training pants because it would have been so much easier than changing into a fresh pair. “Oh, geez, yeah, I was just doing some thinking and I guess I got distracted and had an accident in my pants.” “Wait… I thought you wore diapers too?” Noah looked confused, maybe even bearing a hint of betrayal. “Mom mentioned that she talked with your mom. I thought you were back in diapers like me.” “I-um,” Lucas blushed and finally set his bags down, “I mean… I am, but only at night. I’m like a serious bedwetter and so it’s been a lot easier to go to sleep in my Huggies.” Lucas knelt down and unzipped his bag, pulling out one of the Huggies Ultra-Supremes for Teens that he brought with him for the sleepover. “I’m still uh… In undies. Or, training pants, really.” “Why?” “W… huh? What?” “I mean, why bother with that? Like, wouldn’t it be easier to just go back to diapers instead?” Lucas was going to defend his potty training. He was going to defend his desire to remain in thin, miserable, tragically unabsorbent, awful cloth underwear. But Noah had struck right to the heart of the matter. Which was SO like Noah. He always knew how to ask questions that really dug into the truth of the situation. Maybe it was a fox thing. “I… I….” Lucas looked at his friend, who had a warm smile. He looked down at the Huggies in his paw. He thought about the accidents. The constant failure to make it to the restroom. The load after load after load of laundry. The creeping stains that had become burned onto all of his pants. It was so much trouble. It was so difficult. He thought about how freeing it felt to wake up in his Huggies, waddling around the house without having to worry about if he would make it to the toilet or not. He thought about how if he genuinely, honestly tried to make it to the potty that he would be completely consumed with fear and terror. Noah was right, as he tended to be. “I really don’t wanna be potty trained anymore. I hate the potty. I hate leaking all the time. I hate leaving puddles everywhere. I really, really, really hate the potty. I wanna be back in diapers.” He felt tears well up in his eyes as he looked up to his friend. Why was he getting so emotional? It was just something silly that he wore. It was just clothes. It was just accidents. Everyone had accidents. It was no big deal to have lots and lots of accidents in his pants. But even so, the waterworks flowed. “Awww, dude, it’s ok man.” Noah kneeled down next to Lucas and put his arm around his shoulder. Lucas didn’t know how to react. He wasn’t used to crying like this around his friends. He tried to form words to express how he was feeling and excuse himself from this outburst of passion, but all that came out were sobs and muttering incoherency. “It’s alright, Lucas, I’m here for you.” The two friends hugged each other for a while as Lucas was swept away by the tide of grief, futility, sorrow, happiness, comradery, and embarrassment. He would have never opened himself up like this to his friends before. But now that he was, he was glad it was with a friend who understood him and cared about him. -- “Is everything alright, boys? I thought I heard a commotion.” Mrs. Seong slowly opened the door, moving it from being ajar to being wide enough to fit her muzzle into. “Yeah, yeah, it’s ok. Lucas and I were just talking about like, you know, unpotty training and stuff.” “Oh dear. Lucas? Lucas sweetie, is everything alright?” Mrs. Seong opened the door and stepped in, joining her son next to the teen wolf, who had spent the past several minutes sobbing and attempting to settle himself. “Oh Lucas, you poor dear, we’re all here for you. This is a safe place for you to be yourself.” Lucas inhaled and exhaled with shaky breathing. He had learned from recent volatile incidents that when he got like this that he had difficulty talking for a while. So it was better to just focus on his breathing until he could get that stable. “Noah, sweetie, would you mind getting some tissues and hm… a hot towel. I think that would be best.” Mrs. Seong kneeled, replacing her son as being the closest to the teen wolf on the floor. “Lucas, I know you have been through an awful lot in the last few weeks. A lot of big changes have happened for you. You mean a lot to this family. I’ve known you since you were in… ahem, I’ve known you for a long time. You’re growing up to become a fine young man. And you’re a good friend to my Noah.” Lucas looked up with bleary, red eyes. This was not the first time he had been consoled by the older fox. Helping the wolf out was just in the Seong family or something. “Would you like to go home? It’s alright if you do. I can call your mother and have her here in two shakes of your tail.” Lucas shook his head. He wanted to be here. I wanted to be around his friends. He breathed in and out. He breathed in and out. He breathed in and out. The trembles were slowing and he was regaining his composure. “Well then, if you’re going to stay here then I’m going to insist that we get you into some clean pants. I can’t imagine that’s helping you right now!” The older fox helped lift Lucas up to his feet. He wiped away at his eyes and wiped away at his leaky nose. Noah came in with a box of tissues and a hand towel that had steam coming off of it. “Thank you sweetie. Ok Lucas, go ahead and put this on your face. That always makes me feel better after I’ve had a cry.” The wolf took the hot towel and held it against him. The warmth of the cloth was nourishing. It was just hot enough to shock his system without scalding him. It was a tranquility that helped to calm him and transition him from his emotional outburst to a state where he felt ready to be around people again. When he took the towel off, he felt like a new man. A new man who needed to blow his nose. -- “Alright Lucas, pants off. Do you have spare undies with you?” “Um… yes but… Mrs. Seong… Could, I mean, would, you um… would it be ok if…” Lucas knew exactly what he wanted. He knew to his core what his desire was. But it wasn’t the kind of thing he could just ask! Saying it out loud was difficult. The fox stepped back, her hands on her hips. Lucas had his pants around his ankles and was in sopping wet training pants, which by this point had been thoroughly yellowed and discolored. He must have looked quite the sight. Noah discretely pointed to the underside of the changing table. Mrs. Seong’s eyebrows raised. “Lucas, you know full well that in this household we use our words when we want something. If you are trying to ask me something, I am going to need for you to say it.” The wolf paused. Collected himself. He had just cried over this. He could do this. He wanted this. Deep down he needed this. It was bubbling up and now it was ready. He had been building up to this moment for weeks. “I… would like to wear diapers instead of undies tonight.” For some reason he expected the worst. Maybe he would be laughed at or slapped or they would call his parents and find some way for him to get in trouble. Instead he got a chuckle and a good-natured shake of the head, Mrs. Seong’s hands raised up in an exasperated pose. “Is that it? That’s what’s got you all worked up tonight? Lucas, of course you can. Goodness child, you’d think this was an interrogation.” Mrs. Seong bent over and picked up the Huggies diaper that was laying atop the duffel bag. “C’mon, let’s get you up on the changing table before I change my mind! I’m joking! Goodness, these kids, so serious.” Lucas could not for the life of him control his tail, which wagged with a ferocity that was never before seen. It wagged so hard that he was worried it would fly off. He stripped down and hopped up onto the changing table. It was firm, but the padded mat kept it from being uncomfortable. He was used to being changed on his bed. It wasn’t too different of an experience logistically, but in terms of how he felt and what this piece of furniture signified, it was worlds apart. The change went by in a blur. Clearly helping Noah in recent days had removed any rust that had accumulated in his mother’s abilities. Within a few short minutes, the diaper was snuggly taped on and Lucas found himself standing again. He had the biggest, dopiest grin on his face as he stood pantsless in his friend’s room. Just as he had done previously, he examined himself, checking the fit and feel of his padding. HIS diaper. This diaper was his and it was for him. He belonged in diapers. It was right and normal and good for him to be in diapers. He wasn’t ready for undies at all! Noah was absolutely and completely right: he was playing pretend when he said he was potty trained. He was fooling the world and himself into thinking he was actually ready for the potty. The truth was that he was UNpotty trained and it had taken far too long for him to accept this fact. “No ‘Thank you Mrs. Seong’ for my backbreaking work?” The fox was in a jovial mood and was clearly being ironic for the sake of levity. Lucas wasn’t having any of it. The teen launched into a great big hug, nearly knocking her off her feet. “Thank you so much. Thank you so so so so SO much.” “Alright, alright, goodness,” the hug separated and the fox regained her composure, “you boys really are growing up fast. Alright, you two play nice. If you need anything, let me know ok? I’ll be downstairs. Try to keep the noise level to a dull roar.” -- With both friends now openly diapered, happily diapered, they launched into serious hangout time. They talked and lazed around and played games. Noah had been practicing up in Culpable Cog: Endeavor and kicked Lucas’ butt again and again and again. It was great. They were regaining the lost time that they had missed for the past several weeks. The best part was that it was so easy. It was like they could be their full selves without any hiding or shame. The barriers that sometimes formed in adolescence in an attempt to shield against vulnerable honesty has been eradicated. In talking, they both learned that they were on the same overnight meditation system. In their minds, it was a surprising thing to share. Noah had looked it up on Nile and had found it was called the “Retrain System.” It was highly reviewed and worked extremely well at helping people overcome developmental and academic issues. Noah mentioned that one of the effects was supposed to be a reversal of potty training ability. “Does that bother you? Like do you think this was the intended effect?” Lucas hadn’t looked any of this up so he was unsure how to feel. “You know, I dunno. I know how I feel right now. I really, genuinely, honestly feel that I wasn’t ready for potty training. I don’t think I should have been potty trained. And I feel like I was pretending this whole time.” Noah was flipping through Spasm streams for Summit Luminaries. “I really prefer being back in diapers.” “Me too. I wonder if like, I don’t know, maybe it turns out that people have potty issues because lots of people shouldn’t have been potty trained in the first place.” Lucas’ crotch warmed as he involuntarily flooded his Huggies. The liquid soaked into the core and the diaper swelled in a pleasing way. “Yeah, I’ll talk to my mom about it at some point. But really, I feel good. I… Mmmffff….” The fox leaned forward in his seat, his tail raised up. Lucas heard the obvious sounds of his friend’s diaper filling. The crackling of the plastic diaper material combined with the heavy fragrance to create an unmistakable experience. He sat back down with an audible squelch as if nothing had happened at all. “Mfff I made big poopies… Um but yeah, I feel good and I think I’m really a lot happier like this.” The teens barely reacted at all to either event; the loaded diaper or the revelation about the special meditation system. In fact, there was a kind of normality to the two being able to go potty in their pants without any concerns at all that was refreshing. It contrasted to how prior to wearing diapers, the two had struggled with all sorts of embarrassments and logistical problems. Instead, they felt free to be themselves around each other in a setting where things were far more convenient. -- The doorbell rang. Noah got up with an excited expression. Lucas joined him. Jake was here! The pair scrambled out of the room, not even bothering to put their pants on, and clambered towards the stairs. Mrs. Seong was already at the door, talking to someone. “Saundra it’s so good to see you! Please, come in. Would you like some coffee? I have a lovely new roast that I ordered online. I think you’d like it!” “I appreciate it Kamille… I was just here to drop off Jake but… You know what, sure, I’ll take you up on that offer!” The adult raven stepped inside. Behind her, stepped in an adolescent raven wearing a baggy hoodie and baggy cargo shorts. The tips of his feathers had been dyed a light teal, which faded pleasantly inward, giving him a wave of head-dressing that was quite stylish. “Jake!!” Lucas and Noah cried out in unison from the top of the stairs. The raven looked up and his expression was like he had been shined on by a spotlight. He retreated a step, his hands raised defensively. Then he narrowed his eyes and leaned forward. His shoulders slouched and his hands fell by his side. “BRUH. You fucking shitheads didn’t tell me you were back in diapers too!!” Jake lifted up his hoodie, revealing the unmistakable purple and white waistband of Teen Luvs diapers. “AYYYY!” “Jake, remember what I said about watching your language,” came a voice out of the adjacent room. “Sorry Mommy!” Jake called out and looked at his friends who were barreling down the stairs. The three embraced in a group hug, having not seen each other since the end of 8th grade, where they all left on awkward terms. “Oh my gods, I missed you guys so much.” “It’s been too long! Gosh I’m so glad you could make it Jake,” Noah responded. “Me too, ugh it’s been a crazy couple of weeks and…” He sniffed at the air, then paused and reached out behind him, giving his butt a few hefty squeezes. “Sorry I think I need a change. I must have gone poopy.” “No, that’s just Noah. He went poopy before you got here. You should see his room, his diaper pail is like SUPER full.” “You WOULD have an overflowing diaper pail!” “What’s that supposed to mean!” “You know exactly what it means!” “I don’t get what it means.” “That’s because it doesn’t mean anything!” “Ya-huh it does!” “Oh my gods you’re such a hecking bully.” “Shut up stinkybutt.” The baseless teasing and posturing whenever a group of teens got together clearly held true regardless of their continence and choice of underwear. “Ok you boys, go on upstairs and… Noahhh. Come here sweetie.” Mrs. Seong walked into the foyer carrying a small bag of fancy coffee beans. The teen sheepishly broke away from the group as Lucas and Jake snickered with each other. The waistband of Noah’s Pampers was pulled back and he was given a quick swat on the butt. “Upstairs young man, you need a change, pronto. Sorry Saundra, I’ll just be a moment. I need to get my boy cleaned up.” “I know how that is. It seems like Jakey is practically always one wetting away from leaking these days.” The raven casually scrolled on her phone as the foxes headed upstairs. “Mooommmm!” Lucas was giddy with excitement. He hadn’t seen this kind of fun teasing around his friends in ages. It was really nice to just have fun with his friends again. -- “So like, what happened at soccer camp dude? I don’t think you were unpotty trained before, unless I seriously missed some details!” The three teens were lounging around in Noah’s room, resting on the bed, the floor, and a folding chair stolen from the garage. Jake had taken off his baggy clothes, revealing an FC Carba jersey and his drooping Luvs diaper. Lucas noted that he was drinking heavily from a large water jug. It was the size of one of those big soda bottles! The mystery of why he was always close to leaking seemed solved without much difficulty. “Oh geez, yeah, it was fucking wild. I got switched from the original camp I was supposed to go to for a different one. But it was fine. Like it was a really dope training camp. I learned a lot and I got some seriously incredible coaching. They had some of the staff from Barkdale College there. The drills and stuff were brutal but I feel so much more comfortable around the ball.” Jake took a huge swig of his water. “But, uh, yeah like I started wetting the bed pretty early on. A lot of people were having that problem. It was weird because like the staff was totally prepared for it. I mean that made it way less embarrassing and not a hassle but like they had plastic sheets and stuff just ready to go.” “Wow! How many people were wetting the bed?” Lucas leaned forward on the folding chair. “Uhhhhh… shit I don’t know. I mean I didn’t like go up to people and ask if they pissed their sheets!” Jake giggled. It was a little bit unlike him but at the same time it wasn’t too out of place. It was more that he had become such a negative and argumentative person in the last year. Hearing him laughing was something out of the ordinary in general. Lucas was happy to hear it, still. “But I will say just about everyone had big-time potty problems. They got us drinking a lot of fluids since we were exercising so much. By the end of the first week most people weren’t even bothering to head out to the portapotties. They were just going in their pants and getting on with training.” “It must be really uncomfortable to run around in peepee pants like that…” Noah had his hand on his chin. “Wouldn’t it chafe?” Jake pointed at Noah and gave an over-exaggerated nod. “You figured it out! Running around in wet pants fucking sucks. They ended up having a big meeting in the dining hall where the camp director basically told everyone that we would be training in diapers for the rest of the session. I don’t know why but we all just kinda went along with it. You know, I’m really glad that happened because it was getting dicey trying to figure out when to go potty.” “What, everyone at the camp was just cool with being put back in diapers?” Lucas tilted his head. Even with his own experience, it had taken some serious emotional and mental wrangling to admit to himself that he wasn’t ready to be in big kid undies. It was difficult to believe that an entire camp of volatile teens would be perfectly fine with that plan. “Oh fuck no dude. It was wild. I thought it would be a riot. We went along with it but not at the beginning. But they made it so it was a staggered program. Like one cabin got their diapers at a time. It was weird.” The raven paused and looked down, trying to figure out the best way to phrase the next part. “ It was like… I was SOOO fucking jealous when I saw the first cabin all padded up. Like I don’t know why. I just saw them running around in diapers and it looked so easy and fun. They were so happy. I really wanted that. I guess everyone else felt the same way because all the pushback died as soon as we got the chance to wear them.” “I was like that when I saw Noah wearing training pants instead of undies. I wanted them SO bad.” Lucas blushed, realizing that he hadn’t revealed that kind of detail before to anyone. “Ooooo Lucas was jealous of my soaky-woaky peepee pants,” Noah reprimanded in an exaggerated voice. He got up and turned around, smacking the seat of his diaper, wiggling his butt for good measure. “And you were so jealous of my diaperbutt that you gave up undies for good!” Noah always seemed to have a talent for accompanying his teasing with a smuggest of expressions. “Shut uuuuup!” Lucas threw a pillow at him. “I’m sorry that I was trying to relate MY experience to my FRIEND’S experience, poopypants.” “And I’m sorry that your shorts are all stained from you pissing your pants all the time!” Noah was barely able to get that sentence out from laughing through it. “Wow, real mature guys. Super glad to find that I came home to all my friends being turned into big babies.” Jake rolled his eyes and then looked down, putting his hand against his inner thigh and then against the carpet beneath him. “Uhhhh… Hold on, I just have to uh… go ask Mommy for a diaper change real quick.” The raven stormed out to the sounds of his two friends heckling him. Jake’s mother left shortly after he returned in clean Luvs. The rest of the evening went by in a blur. It was fantastic finding no time lost between friends. They spent most of their time talking, sorting through all of the notable events that had occurred since the start of summer break. Noah got more information out of Jake about the soccer camp over the course of the evening. It turns out they were using a very similar nighttime meditation system to help manage everyone’s sleep schedules and maximize their time spent training. Jake hadn’t done any research into it but he specifically remembered that it was brought up during the onboarding seminar. He hadn’t put the pieces together about it being the root cause of his unpotty training until Noah filled him in. According to Jake, it was surprisingly easy to get used to running around playing soccer in diapers. The athletic variety of the diapers he wore while training were quite comfortable, even with all the movement. The oddest thing was, none of the boys felt negatively about the situation. They could have been outraged at being duped by their parents and coaches into having no potty control. They could have been furious at the company selling the Retrain System for daring to put such a product on the market. They could have felt self-hatred for being affected by such a life-changing event. But none of them felt that way at all. If anything, they all seemed happy to be back in diapers. Happy to no longer worry about the potty. Happy that the major transformation was over with. Happy that now they could reap the benefits of having quelled tempers and great sleep. They each liked how things had turned out for them. Whether that was a result of the system affecting their perception and reactions or genuine satisfaction with the outcome was unclear. Perhaps it was a mixture of both and had become impossible to untangle. It was clear that their parents had made the decision to use the Retrain System without consulting them. And that was obviously a life-changing event. Still, they harbored no ill-will for the choice their parents made on their behalf. It was like they were able to look back with an unusually nuanced and mature perspective, despite it being a recent development. It was like an adult reflecting on good parenting choices that had been made decades prior. It was more complicated for Noah, who had the most difficulty while undergoing the process. It was during all this discussion that Noah revealed that he had a cousin who had gone through this program as part of a trial a year earlier. The reason why he had an interest in figuring out the mystery was because he knew the end result ahead of time. As he was losing control over his bladder and bowels he knew that he would end up being in diapers just like his cousin, which severely impacted his mood. That was, until he ended up on the other side of things, at which point everything clicked. Noah compared it to jumping into a pool: the shock of the cold water left him shivering and defenseless, but then he acclimated to it and it became comfortable. The open and frank discussions between friends was sorely needed. But it wasn’t quite as important as playing games and dicking around. Which was the entire point of the sleepover. “Lucas, did you screen-look?” Jake had just been flushed out from his favorite sniper spot. He had narrowly avoided a grenade intended to take him out. “Uh… no! You’re too obvious, man!” Lucas HAD been looking at Jake’s section of the television, but he knew for a fact that Jake had been looking at HIS little square, so it was really fair. “You always like to… Mffff… perch…” Lucas’ power-suited character paused in place as the wolf shifted in his seat. His diaper crinkled and rustled as he did so. The plastic had loosened from the heat of the numerous wettings and occasional rubs and gropes from the teen. The tapes were still on tight and thankfully he hadn’t leaked, unlike his raven friend. His tummy felt a little bit tight and there was an urgency that he body attempted to convey to him. Lucas had no idea what it meant and was far too invested in the game to really care. He leaned forward from his floor position, getting himself on his knees. He got his character moving again. “Yeah and you’re such a cheater and-HEY!” Jake’s armored future warrior collapsed to the ground as a barrage of automatic fire riddled his body. “No fair dude, you know the assault rifle is busted.” “Yeah and you had the chance to pick one up but you ALWAYS have to pick the sniper rifle and pretend like you’re super cool.” Noah sounded so casual. He had clearly been practicing over the last few weeks. Lucas tried his best to circle around the small map, trying to find a good angle on Noah. He had an idea of where the gunfire came from, but he had to be careful in approaching or he would end up right in the line of sight. He was turning the corner around one of the pillars on the vaguely industrial map, when he felt the tightness inside him increase. He held onto the controller and tried to fight through the discomfort. He circled around, managing to sneak up on Noah. He lined up his shot, intent on taking him out from behind. A stray cramp ran through his gut. He got a few shots off that actually hit, but his aim was totally thrown. Noah’s Galatian spun around and a couple of quick taps on his controller got him another kill on the scoreboard. “Dude, c’mon, I though-MFFF… I… I… I gotta make big poopies in my Huggies!” He closed his eyes and gripped his controller. His tail flagged as his body tensed, flexing his muscles as his body coaxed itself to void. His diaperseat expanded, sagging down and filling out. Even over the sounds of gunfire from the video game, it was audible that the wolf was messing his diaper. Lucas had no control over the situation. He couldn’t have stopped himself even if he wanted to. His ability to hold back was totally removed and resulted in his poopy diaper ballooning out with warm mush. The elastic legguards held tight against his body, keeping the mess perfectly contained. The space designs on the rear of his Huggies became stained as he pushed and pushed and filled his diaper to its limit. Lucas powered through the tense, high-pressure sensations. He rode them as they settled, has his body finally became satisfied that he had totally emptied himself. His tail lowered and he went from grunting in exertion to panting in completion. Without a second thought, he lowered himself on his tush, getting back into his comfortable position. He felt the muck spread along his sensitive parts, the diaper squelching and squishing under him. The teen felt relieved and accomplished. He had just overcome some great difficulty and now it was done with. He wiggled in place, appreciating this new and unique sensation. His breathing settled as the smell of his massive accident mingled with the smells of his two friends, who were each also sitting in their own poopy diapers. Over the course of the evening, each of the boys had managed to loudly and unashamedly pack their diapers with huge messes. And now that Lucas had joined them, they were each just casually sitting in Noah’s bedroom, playing Aura: Eternal deathmatches. None of them brought up the fact that they were sitting in smushy, stinky diapers and that the nursery smell had become overwhelming. It was like they were totally blind to it and in their minds, there was nothing unusual about lazing around in heavy, sagging, stained diapers; puffed out and completely full. “Ok boys, it’s getting late, it’s time for… WHEW!” Mrs. Seong had entered, presumably with a knock, but the teens were so distracted by their gaming session that they didn’t acknowledge it. The fox was fanning her nose in an exaggerated display. By this time the game had been paused and everyone was looking at her. “Oh my gosh, why am I not surprised that teenage boys would just want to sit around in poopy diapers. Ok, you boys need changes, pronto. C’mon, everyone up.” She clapped her hands and Noah and Jake reluctantly rose up. Lucas got up after spending a few seconds gawking at the diapers of his best friends. They had become undeniably discolored and drooped from excessive weight. Lucas had no idea why but they were just fascinating to look at. He had to tear himself away from the sight of his friends’ rears, otherwise he could spend all evening looking at them. “Ok Jake, c’mon, up on the changing table. We need to get your in your nightnight pants. Your mother told me exactly how you like it done. So no fussing, alright?” The raven was quickly up on the table, his arms crossed. He bashfully looked away from his friends as his overdue diaper change began. “Oh… oh boy. Ahem. Boys, this might take a while. Noah, I see you have some balled up diapers on the floor by the pail. Please take it out.” Noah sighed and began picking up the stray diapers that had accumulated around the overflowing diaper pail, holding them in his arms like he was carrying grocery bags. He sighed more and toddled out of his room. He was clearly huffy that he was forced to interrupt his play time with chores, even if those chores were his own fault. “Lucas, be a dear and help Noah take out the rest of them.” The wolf jumped up and waddled over to the pail. Mrs. Seong, not missing a beat, instructed him on how to remove the bag and replace it, all while cleaning up Jake. The trip to the garbage bin was arduous. The burden of the bag combined with his own compromised walk made it far more difficult than he would have figured. Lucas remembered the promise made by the Huggies packaging, assuring him that he would remain leak-free. He was grateful for it, but that didn’t help him when his legs were being forced apart by the bulk around his crotch. By the time he returned, Jake had been changed and Noah was on the table being cleaned. Jake was guzzling down water from his bottle, standing bow-legged, wearing the most ridiculous looking diaper imaginable. Lucas let out a guffaw, unable to help himself. Jake lowered the now-emptied water bottle and shot him a look. “Dude what are you wearing!!” “Look, Mommy says that I have to be double-diapered at night with extra boosters! I’m a heavy bedwetter and it’s for YOUR safety, unless you really like waking up in a puddle of my pee!” Jake pouted, placed his hands on his diaperfront and diaperseat, and gave them a heft, as if he needed to demonstrate their thickness. His empty water bottle dangled between his legs as it was looped around his thumb. Lucas held up his hands in a mock sign of surrender. “Ok, ok, sorry! I just wasn’t expecting that when I came up the stairs. I’ve had enough experience waking up wet recently. I’d rather it stay in our diapers.” “Speaking of which,” Mrs. Seong was putting the finishing touches on Noah’s change. It was only then that Lucas noticed the second diaper being folded on top. “I decided it would be best for each of you to be like this. I’m sure you’ll stay up even though I’m specifically telling you it’s bedtime, and I’m not going to be waking up at 3am because you boys are leaky.” Her normally gentle and diplomatic tone was gone, presumably thanks to the hard work it took to change two excessively dirty diapers in a row (soon to be three). “Yes, Mrs. Seong. Sorry Jake, I wasn’t trying to make fun of you.” Lucas’ tail was between his legs. “It’s ok, poopybutt.” He got a mischievous grin, his competitive side immediately showing. “Besides, it’s not like you could ever actually soak one of these through all the way like I can.” Lucas was instantly goaded. “Uhhhh first of all, yes I absolutely can. And second of all, I’ll have you know that I’m like a super serious bedwetter too. I just happen to limit myself before bed as a COURTESY so I don’t flood my sheets.” There was no sense of strangeness to gloating over his need for diapers at night. There was no need to hide his ability to completely drench his mattress in a single evening. All the wolf felt was the embers of rivalry that this smug bird was always provoking. “Oh yeah? Wow, look at you! Gosh, would you look at that, I’m ALREADY pissing my Luvs. Gosh puppy, are you SURE you can keep up?” “DUDE no fair! You got changed before me AND you already… Grrr…” Lucas furrowed his brow. He was being completely suckered into Jake’s challenge. He yelped and jumped as a squelching SLAP echoed. Noah was off the changing table and had given his diaperbutt a serious smack. “Your turn, buddy.” -- Lucas was vulnerable in a way he had never before experienced. He was holding his legs aloft, a bottle of water upturned in his lips. His bottom was being wiped and wiped and wiped and wiped again and wiped some more and then again wiped. Mrs. Seong was humming some song softly to herself while Jake and Noah were starting another round of games. It wasn’t exactly humiliating to be in his position; having his big poopy diaper changed. It was more like he was exposing a very private and difficult part of himself to someone else. He wasn’t hiding his true self and pretending to be someone else. And that wasn’t easy. He didn’t have much of a choice in the matter: his diaper desperately needed to be changed. And in order to do so, he had to undergo an intensive cleaning like this. But while it was happening he couldn’t help but feel like layers of mental defensive coating were being stripped away. Like being cleaned by someone was somehow able to reflect a stronger bond. That because of this tender action, he could trust the person changing him more. The bottle of water was handed to him by Noah, who had a matching bottle with him. It was smaller than the bottle that Jake was drinking from, but it was still sizable. It had a sport cap on it, allowing him to drink the water with the container totally upended without spilling on him or drowning him. He suckled at the tip of the bottle, happy to have something to occupy his hands while the thorough change happened. It was a practiced action from a far older time in his life. But it felt natural to return to it. Importantly, it wasn’t immature. It wasn’t a baby bottle. It was a normal sports bottle that normal teens used and despite him drinking it while having a big poopy diaper changed, he did not feel that it impacted his maturity. That sense of maturity and self-ownership had never really disappeared throughout the whole untraining process. Lucas knew that he was still going into high school next year. He was excited to be growing up and advancing. He was proud of himself for the way he composed himself and he wanted to really excel when he arrived in high school. He hadn’t worked out exactly what that would mean for him in reality. All he had were the depictions of high school in the media and what his teachers and parents had told him. But no matter what, he was going to try really hard to do a good job. His diapered state did not impact that view and desire in the slightest. If anything, it made him feel more comfortable with himself, especially since he had friends who were just like him. Before he even knew it, his thigh was being tapped and a hand was being extended to help upright him from the changing table. He gave Mrs. Seong a big hug and thanked her for cleaning him up. “No problem, Lucas.” She was clearly spent from her considerable effort. He didn’t get the sense that he had inconvenienced her, however. She seemed content with the activity. Like she was getting some kind of reward out of her actions. She addressed the room. “Alright you stinkers, I’m going to bed. If you need anything, you know where to find it. Unless it’s another change, in which case it won’t be until the morning, understood?” The boys all acknowledged and said good night. It was only then that Lucas realized the sheer bulk of the diaper that he was put in. His last diaper made him waddle with a considerable gait before, but that was only after it had been filled to its limit. This diaper was even more of a physical impediment even while dry. How Jake could possibly ever max out the capacity on this double-diaper monstrosity was beyond Lucas. Be he was darn sure going to try his best! He had been challenged and that was NOT going to be left unacknowledged! He downed the rest of his bottle and headed to the bathroom to refill, fully intent on out-soaking his friend. -- The following morning was much like any sleepover. One person woke up before everyone else, then someone joined them, and the remaining sleepers had to put up with giggling and talking and the corresponding sounds of kids having fun. Lucas was always the last to wake up in these events. He yawned and stretched in his sleeping bag. Blinking in the morning light once, then twice, then a few more times for good measure. Noah’s room had begun playing the meditative sounds of the Retrain System far later than Lucas was used to. Presumably Noah had the version of the system that could detect when activity was occurring in the room. And they were active until almost one in the morning. Still, it allowed for a comfortable night’s rest and a familiar ambiance as his own room. Lucas unzipped his sleeping bag and threw off the flap, leaning forward on his elbows as he examined his diaper. He pushed himself upright and took both his paws to inspect the state. He was pleased to find that his outer diaper was in-fact a little bit damp! Ha! Lucas leaned over to declare his victory over Jake, ready to show him how he had won their stupid contest. He was greeted with Jake standing right next to him, his padding drooping down to face-level, completely and totally swollen and stained yellow, the fade-when-wet designs having been long obliterated. “Awww gosh Lucas, you talk a big talk but,” Jake mock-shined his nails against his chest (which looked comical thanks to his feathered hands), “I guess you just can’t keep up with a real super soaker like me!” “Dude you totally cheated by drinking water before me!” “You could have been drinking water the whole time!” “Oh yeah, of course, I’m going to just chug down water on the OFF CHANCE that I get challenged to a peepee pants competition by my friends. That makes sense!” “Thank you, I’m glad you acknowledge that I’m right.” “You’re such a butthead oh my gods!” -- The morning turned into early afternoon and the teens finally returned to their homes. Lucas was in the final Huggie that he had brought to Noah’s house. He had such a transformational experience at his friend’s house that he really didn’t pay any mind to it as he walked home. He felt like a fresh and new person. When he arrived home, his Dad was waiting for him. “Did you have a good time?” He was sitting in the living room, hunched over the coffee table, a pair of snippers in his paw as he undid plastic bits from pieces of sprue. There was a chemical scent to the air as he was using dabs of glue to fasten his models together. Normally he did this at his workspace he set up for these things. He must have been waiting for Lucas to arrive home. “Uh, yeah, it was great. Jake was back from his summer soccer camp.” Lucas set down the bags in the living room since his Dad seemed interested in talking. “Oh interesting! I hope he had a good time there. He’s a good kid. I hope he is able to keep that temper in check.” Lucas’ Dad set down the part he was working on. It was some fantasy figure from a media series Lucas wasn’t interested in (much to his father’s dismay). “Lucas, your mother and I had a talk with Mrs. Seong last night, and again this morning.” Lucas looked left and up, thinking back to last night. A lot of things happened last night. He certainly hoped he didn’t cause any trouble for Noah’s mom. She was a really nice person and had always been a gracious host. He didn’t like knowing that he might have done something rude or disruptive while there. “Uh….” He tried his best to think about anything that he might have done that would warrant a parent-to-parent call. “About what? I promise I was on good behavior!” His Dad chuckled and shook his head. “No, no, nothing negative. The opposite, in fact. She mentioned that you had decided to wear diapers after having an accident at their house. And it sounded like you went through a bunch of them while you were there.” Lucas was confused. He was unsure if he should be feeling relief at his Dad’s gentle tone or dread over deciding to give up on his potty training altogether. Was that ok? He hadn’t even consulted his parents! Like yeah, they were the ones that put him on this Retrain Program in the first place but surely they would want some input before he went declaring that he wanted to be put back in diapers and never use the potty again! “Uhhh… Y-yeah. I went through all my Huggies and uh… Mrs. Seong did a good job changing me and… yeah…” Lucas felt the same apprehension and tension as he did the prior night when he admitted how he felt to his friends. But he steadied himself. His hands balled into fists at his sides. He stood up straight and looked his father in the eyes. “Dad. I… I don’t want to wear undies anymore. I don’t want to use the potty. I hate the potty. I want to go back to wearing diapers. I’m happy in diapers.” His father smiled and nodded a few times, before slapping his knees and then standing. He walked over to Lucas and embraced him. “Good boy. I’m proud of you for telling me that. And I’m glad that you’re happy this way.” He pulled back, both hands on the teen’s shoulders. “I have to be honest with you. The meditation system that we installed-” “I know Dad. Noah found out about the Retrain System. He told me everything.” Lucas smiled, finally happy to have everything out on the table, without any worries. “Oh, I see. And… are you… mad with us?” “No!” The teen laughed and gave another quick hug before backing away. “No, not at all. I’m really happy with how I’m feeling and… I had a really good time with my friends last night. It was all so easy and normal for us to be around each other. I’ve missed that so much.” His father’s shoulders slumped as he let out a sigh from deep in his soul. The relief was palpable. “Although, uh, next time you want to like unpotty train me or whatever, you can always ask me first!” Lucas laughed and his Dad chuckled. It was clear that his Dad had been dwelling on the decision to put Lucas through this whole process. And Lucas was very pleased that he could relieve him of those concerns. -- Carmella sipped her coffee. It was black. It was bitter. It was perfect. The warm liquid flowed through her and invigorated her. Lines of energy crisscrossing within her like a chakra network, all aligning as they were rejuvenated with fresh caffeine. Carmella had learned that she didn’t actually need to order a big fancy drink at a cafe just because they offered it. And just because her friends always got complicated orders. She could just let the coffee speak for itself. The book club had become a parental gossiping forum in recent weeks, however it appeared to be back to its usual goal. There were only so many permutations of discussing strategy to encourage your child to wet their pants that someone could realistically go through. Still, it was nice having a support network while actually going through the Retrain System. “So, Saundra, did you have a chance to read the book?” Kamille took out the hardback from her purse, setting it down on the table that all of the women were seated around. If the bookmark was to be believed, Kamille was almost finished with the 500 page slog that everyone had agreed to read. “You know what, I actually found some time to get stuck in! I don’t know how you actually managed to find a decent page-turner for once Kamille! I was beginning to doubt your choice in literature for a bit.” The raven held up her book as if raising her hand for a class. She had a dog-eared paperback. “I have to agree with Saundra!” Carmella interjected into the conversation. She quickly followed up, realizing if she didn’t clarify that it might be taken as her not trusting her friend’s book recommendations. “Not the uh, literature choice stuff haha! I found myself engrossed with this one. I might actually pick up some other things from this author when we finish.” “That means a lot. Honestly, I was beginning to worry about my book selection myself. I was trying to go with more artistic or classical choices, but really it just feels good to actually want to finish a damn story for once! I don’t need to open up VoltSummary to find out what the author meant with their stupid symbolism.” Everyone laughed. It had kind of become an unspoken truth that the women were all looking up synopses and commentary online rather than actually reading the assignment. Carmella hoped that meant more fun reads were coming in the future. “Say, was Daria supposed to show up? I didn’t see if she messaged the group.” Saundra looked around, cup of coffee in hand, scanning the cafe. As if Daria accidentally sat at the wrong table and didn’t notice her friends. “Oh! There she is!” The group turned to watch Daria walk from the entrance to their table. Normally they wouldn’t have bothered watching this totally mundane activity, but Daria had a particular movement to her. Her legs swung out slightly, as if something was forcing them apart. She nearly bumped into someone. That part was normal. She was a bear and tended to be on the larger side. But her walk, or rather, her waddle, was immediately picked-up on by every one of the women sitting there. “Sorry I’m late!” The bear sat down with unmistakable rustling and crinkling sounds, even over the din of the establishment. She adjusted her shirt, an instantly recognizable waistband peeking over her jeans. Daria immediately checked her phone, typing away at something. The women were all looking, staring, gawking. Carmella’s mouth was agape. Was… she wearing a diaper? Daria finished her message, smiling the whole time, and locked her screen. She set the phone down on the table and looked around at the group. After a moment of silence she finally spoke, total innocence in her voice. “What?” The Retrain System.pdf