Trading Post

I was having lunch with a friend. Shortly before we finished I cut loose with several quiet but large farts. As we left the restaurant, he commented about me having just farted. I chuckled and said I farted five minutes ago. He knows that I wear all the time. The look of surprise on his face was funny.

Naperville area here.

Sounds very similar, I wear my women's leggings l pants at night to help keep my morning diaper from falling down, and I will were them over and over and they get that Nice smelly pee smell, but my wife will say y smell pee after maybe a week, and I pick a different pair that has dried for a few weeks, and then over and over. I do need to wash a load of them but they have to hang dry so the issue is places to hang them for a few days. I do have a roommate I call my room I have a twin bed with an invocare hospital mattress, a Nice one, fully protected,, it can handle any fluid... but I have stuff hanging all over the room to dry from the nights beforehand.. I don't sleep in our bedroom and haven't for several yrs, due to the bed smells of our dogs,, and then I need TV on to sleep, and she can't sleep with the TV on, so I spend a lot of time in my recliner.. But we have been married over 30 yrs so you make adjustments in life..

Chapter 19 - Running the Gauntlet Heather found herself thrust forward into the padded shell of the rearward facing carseat as the car came to a sudden stop. Rolling her head to the right she could see a car parked alongside and a large building that looked just like a mall in her own dimension back on earth. Wanting to see more she struggled with the carseat harness, the five point harness doing its job resisting her attempts to get out of the carseat. With both hands she pushed on the centre locking mechanism but it refused to budge. Frustrated she cried out, the pacifier muffling her cries as the car door opened and a large face filled her field of vision. Diane… it was Diane, the woman she had entrusted to help her escape at the Burger Lion two hours ago, now though she didn’t look pleased and that sent a shiver up Heather’s spine. “What are you up to baby girl? That carseat is designed to keep little baby’s like you safe, you can try as hard as you like but that safety harness buckle isn’t going to release until Mommy does it.”  Reaching in with both hands Diane brushed the little’s fingers away then easily released the shoulder and waist straps from the centre buckle. Looking down at the little who she had successfully taken at the Burger Lion she smiled, the day was turning out to be far better than she had expected. All she needed now was to pull off the next phase without raising the girl’s suspicions. “Mama, I’m hungry… its lunchtime,” a young girl’s voice behind the woman called out.  “I know Becky, we will get food in the mall, but first Mommy needs to get the Baby sorted.” WTF, Heather thought as she was plucked from the carseat and into the woman’s arms. Playing the part of a baby to get past the police roadblock was one thing, they were clear of it now but the woman was still referring to her as ’the Baby’.  Enough was enough, it was time to stand her ground. “Daaannn…” she burbled, her speech still garbled from the numbering teething gel that her gums had been coated with as part of the disguise. “Ddddaaa”…. She babbled for a second time still unable to pronounce the woman’s name as she was carried behind the SUV and lowering into the basinet of the lay flat baby pram that she had earlier seen inside the cargo space of the woman’s SUV while being disguised to get past the police roadblock. No way, no way, not a pram, I’m not riding in a baby pram she thought as panic began to overtake her small body. There was no way she was going to let the woman push her around a mall while disguised as a baby and riding in a pram, that was going way too far, even if the woman had helped her escape the little trafficker who had taken her from the hotel that same morning. “Oh my, aren’t you a little chatterbox,” Diane chuckled as she threaded the skinny arms of the petite little that had willingly let herself be disguised as a baby though the leather straps of a safety harness and adjusted the chrome buckles behind the petite girl’s back. The lay flat pram and the walking reins that also doubled as a safety harness to keep a child from climbing out of the pram’s bassinet had belonged to her now kindergartener daughter when she had been a baby, now Heather was their new owner although she was yet to realise that fact. Diane adjusted the soft white leather shoulder and waist straps until they were snug at each of the stainless steel buckles, satisfied she then clipped the anchor straps on each side to the basinet and smiled. The harness was a perfect fit, the petite girl was going nowhere in a hurry even if she tried to escape. When the time came for her to be walking again she would use the extension piece, that would allow her to extend the anchor straps and create a set of good old fashioned walking reins. Leather, soft white leather with shiny chrome buckles that had been adjusted to make the harness snug. Heather wriggled in an attempt to get free of the infantile item but her attempt was a failure. The buckles that kept the harness secure were at the back where she could not see or reach them. Examining the harness she discovered that it had two vertical straps that came down over her shoulders which in turn were secured to an oval piece that covered most of her chest. At each side of the oval a chest strap hugged her torso, following it with her fingers on each side she discovered that the chest strap on each side of her torso was then secured to another vertical strap behind. Giving that strap a tug with her left hand caused the right hand side of the harness to tighten over her shoulders. Its crossed over at the back, that makes it impossible to slide out of she correctly reasoned before discovering that it also had anchor straps on each side that were now secured to the pram bassinet. Glancing down and to her left she saw the anchor strap disappearing between the firm mattress covered with a fitted pram sheet in a pink bunny rabbit pattern that she was now sitting on and the walled side of the bassinet. When she tugged on it nothing happened, turning to her right side she saw the second anchor strap and tried again, nothing, nadda, zilch, it also wasn’t going to budge, both of them were secured like anchors to a rock wall. Looking for another option Heather attempted to push herself onto her knees, if she could achieve that at least could she then climb out of the pram? Leaning forward she began to push up thinking she had cracked the puzzle until the anchor straps on both sides snapped tight preventing her from moving more than half an inch as her diaper crinkling loudly with each movement as if she was trying to crumple a sheet of plastic. Not only had she been thwarted as the pram made its way toward the mall she another problem emerging. Her bladder was full, she needed a bathroom … then before she could react her bottom became warm, OMG, No.. no .. please it can’t be she silently pleaded as a warm sensation invaded her most private spaces.  As Diane pushed the pram toward the mall a police car cruising through the car park crossed immediately ahead of her current position. Glancing inside the car she felt her pulse quicken when she recognised the two young cops from earlier at the Burger Lion in La Enfantaine. Now at the entrance to the mall she stood off to one side, both hands on the handle of the pram that contained the little her daughter had convinced to come with them, now disguised as a young toddler in a dirty diaper than need changing. Discretely she observed the Police car park in an area reserved for service vehicles and its two occupants exit the vehicle. Shit… this is too close for comfort she felt assessing the situation. If the Police Sargent from the roadblock had sent those two clowns to look for her based on what he had seen at the roadblock they needed to ditch their current disguises.

I have something I've been holding onto a while, and I hope this isn't the wrong place to talk about this, but I really wanna tell this story. Truth is I've never quite felt like a boy, never quite felt like a girl either. Just felt like I'm just drifting through space watching people try to match their gendered stereotypes. Boys are supposed to hound after girls, girls are supposed to be peppy and free spirited or what have you. I've watched them fall in line just as much as I've watched them fight back against the so called "Traditions" that bind them. I myself too fell in line for quite a while. Even when I started breaking the lines I still couldn't quite find my own sense of belonging, My own sense of self. Thinking I had to be straight I crushed on girls though I never really fell for them as much as I convinced myself I did. I had an affinity for women's clothing here and there as a teenager. It felt strangely freeing. Imagining myself as a girl made me uncomfortable, and yet, my heat pounded ceaselessly at the idea like I loved it, and as a natural born male in a very conservative household abandoned by my parents as a baby to be raised by my grandparents, well, I never got help. I never got the safety I needed to find that piece of myself. And throwing the diapers into the mix well it just added to my confusion cuz again I never had the safety I needed to explore myself. As young adult I thought I was gay, Pushing myself into unsafe and scary situations basically abusing myself cuz I thought something was wrong with me. Like I had to like guys, and I had to make myself like guys, and I had to hate myself for liking guys. Tricking myself  at the behest of how I had always been taught life works. I do like both men and women, but I'm not actually ATTRACTED to either. Even after I moved out all of this has just been. It's just been so foreign to me.... All these alien concepts I just couldn't figure out and accept, and I lost some pretty good friends because of it. Then one day I woke up and decided I wasn't gonna keep beating myself up over this. I don't mind wearing a dress every now and again. I'm gonna dye my hair green and pierce my ear and do all the things I've always secretly wanted to do. I've even considered micro dosing HRT to get a cuter and more feminine figure. I'm not a boy. I'm not a girl. I'm me, and the only thing I truly love is diapers and infantilization. I love to pad up and wear cute outfits. I love to hug my plushies and watch the cartoons I used to all the time when I was little. To play those videogames that always frustrated me when I was too tiny to understand and have a laugh at the pretty colors and sounds of the ones I enjoyed. I love to color and giggle and suckle my paci and just be me, and that feels... Good. I'm not making myself do things anymore. I don't MAKE myself take care of myself. The way I see it now I'm letting myself do it. I've always wanted to do these things, but didn't have the love in my heart to. Now I do, and I can let myself do all the things I've ever wanted to. I can now bloom into the truest version of myself and hopefully become an outward personification of this newfound love so that I may show the world that it's ok to be yourself.