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I'd recommend a vegetarian diet and home-cooked food. We've not had food poisoning in this household in decades.  I doubt the level of spice had anything to do with it, apart from possibly masking the fact that the food was off. Yours smugly Stroller

Vodka

Snacking on something sweet, spongy, and chocolatey. Pizza for dinner after work.

For now.

147. My Plan in Motion It was clear pretty quickly that this was going to be a long movie. I noticed as I started it that it had markers for scenes, rather than the usual chapters; and the LED numbers flashing on the front of my old DVD player as it started let me know how many scenes there were in total; and I watched the numbers tick up at each scene change, giving me a rough estimate of how long they were. A quick bit of mental arithmetic told me that if the same average continued, the movie would likely come in somewhere around four hours long. Presumably there would be a lot of material kept back for deleted scenes, bonus material, the director’s cut, and whatever else they might use it for. My girls were talking over the movie, speculating about what they were going to see, but I don’t think anyone was going to object to a bit of distraction. The guessing game was almost as much fun as the movie itself for them; and I knew that they would have a great time just speculating. They might even pause the movie, or go back to watch some moment again, making a long screening even longer. “Imagine you’re watching this, not knowing it’s going to be a sequel,” Spike was saying. Ffrances had got as far as seeing the outside of a bookstore before she realised what she was watching; I guessed that the name would have been significant to anyone who paid that much attention to little details. Her hands tightened on my shoulders with the surprise, which made it a little harder for me to think clearly for a second. And that was all the prompt Spike needed to say what she’d heard about the movie being released with an intentionally vague marketing campaign. I wished I could have seen my Mistress’s reaction when she realised. But I was sitting on the floor today, at her feet, and that didn’t make it so easy to watch her as well as the screen. “Prequel, actually,” I chipped in. “The title’s Striker.” And of course that was all the hint that Ffrances needed to start working out what the movie was going to be about, and speculating which of the comic book plots might have gone into it. I tried to take part in the conversation, but her fingers on my neck were making it extremely difficult to concentrate. Ffrances had the remote to start with, but eventually passed it over to the girls. We were all fascinated by what we were watching; even me. I found myself hoping that my current work with Claughton wouldn’t just end, and that I would have the opportunity to keep on working with movie stars and creatives in the future. It was like this one project was opening up a whole new bunch of interests for me, and revealing just how exciting it could be to work behind the scenes on something like this. As I watched the different scenes pass, recorded with varying degrees of completeness, I found myself wondering how the finished version would look; and wondering how they chose how many different rehearsals they would do, with different levels of costume and immersion. My attention was divided now, and in a way I was glad of that. I’d thought as I planned for this afternoon that I would be paying too much attention to Tess, worrying about my little girl. And that would surely have made her suspicious. But the movie was really good, even alternating between people in costume and people just sitting around with their scripts on the table in front of them. I found myself really wondering where the story was going, and trying to work out how the biker could possibly have survived. And just when I was completely focused on the screen, Ffrances’s hands on my back gently urged me to move from my place at her feet. I could sit across her lap, and her teeth teased my earlobe for a second, completely demanding my attention. Ffrances was paying so much attention to me that I might have missed parts of the movie, if we weren’t so often skipping back to make sure that we hadn’t missed any details. Ffrances had one hand on the remote, but I knew that if she made me miss some detail I could press the button just as easily. “Can we pause?” Tess’s voice pulled me back to reality, and I realised that for the last ten minutes, a small part of my mind had just been following the audio of the movie, while most of my awareness was dominated by Mistress’s lips, and the feelings of helplessness when she bit down on my neck. With the kids around, I knew that I had to keep quiet, and somehow that just made it all the more exciting. When the movie was over, I was sure, I would already have melted completely and Ffrances could do whatever she wanted with me. But right now, I had to put those thoughts on the back burner and pay a little attention to my family. Ffrances pressed the button. Tess hurried to the kitchen, apparently refilling her drink. I guessed that on some level she was aware that she needed to follow my suggestion, but she really didn’t know how long we were going to be sitting here. I wondered if she would be able to hold it until the ending or not; probably not if she was drinking so much already. And that meant that even if I wanted to think about my own pleasure, I needed to make sure that my little was going to be okay. “Great movie,” I whispered to Ffrances, taking advantage of the break to lean a little closer, so that I could excite her just like she was stimulating me for a few minutes. “It is,” she said. “I thought if I watched this, I’d be so… focused on the screen. Like for Tags. But while it’s not the final version, I think the lines are more interesting than what we actually see. I’ll have to watch it again some time, but I think you don’t mind me concentrating on the good toy who’s brought me such joy as well.” “Mmm,” I mumbled, and lost myself for a moment as her hands wandered a little more than I would have been comfortable with if Tess were still in the room. “But I thought…” “But I…” I repeated, when I could get my breath back for a second. Ffrances really was doing her best to drive me wild now, and it was only the fact that I was worrying so much about my little girl that let me keep a conscious thought in my mind. “I’m a little worried about Tess. She was moving a little… I don’t know. She seems to be slightly uncomfortable. And if she has a problem, I want her to be comfortable talking to us about it.” “I was trying to keep your mind off that,” Ffrances whispered, and then I glanced over at where Spike was sitting on the couch, assiduously pretending that she couldn’t hear our conversation. Spike’s dress was a little dishevelled, and I tried to put something together in my mind, to work out what I’d missed. I hadn’t actually seen anything from Tess; Ffrances was too good at stopping me from seeing what she didn’t want me to see. But from the blush there, I could guess right away that Ffrances and I hadn't been the only ones making out during the movie, like just about every highschooler at the cinema. It was hard to imagine those two girls being as careless as I’d been in my teen years, but I was sure I could read the situation well enough. “No, not that,” I said, pretending that it didn’t worry me at all. There were more important things to think about right now. A couple of girls with wandering fingers weren’t a big deal; it was just a little curiosity, and I knew as well as anyone that some urges were too powerful to resist. At least she was at home, where there wasn’t any real threat to her safety. “I mean… she seems like she’s kind of… Not an emotional thing, you know? She seemed like there was something wrong that she’s refusing to admit.” “I’ll keep an eye on her,” Ffrances said. “Look, I think they’re okay. Is there something…” We didn’t continue the conversation, as Tess came back with a tray of drinks for everyone, carefully making sure that everybody got the right glass. I was sure that Ffrances noticed that; and I could only hope that it would come to her mind when I suggested later that Tess might have been abusing the diuretic pills again. It only needed Ffrances to think that, and she would no longer trust Tess to set the limits of her own regression. I would have the power I needed to make sure that my baby kept being my baby, and I could protect her from herself for as long as she thought it was a good idea to rebel. “I don’t know,” I whispered, making sure this time that I wasn’t overheard. If the girls noticed the delay in resuming the movie, they would probably put it down simply to an excess of affection. “It’s like she’s squirming a little. When she asked for a pause, I thought it was a call of nature, but she’s got fresh drinks. She’s the only one who’s on her third glass since you came home. I wonder if… You know what I said before, right? She’s… testing herself, maybe? I’m not sure, but I’m sure she was squirming in her seat, and trying to hide it.” “I don’t know,” Ffrances said, whispering just as low. “I’m sure if she was actually uncomfortable, she would say so.” “Let’s give her the choice. So she can go whenever she needs to.” “Good idea,” Ffrances purred, nibbling on my neck again as she handed the remote over to Tess. “I’ll make sure she’s okay. But it means I can pay more attention to my little toy. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” “Yes, Mistress!” I gasped, being reminded that her hand was still on my thigh even as the movie restarted. But still, I couldn’t completely relax and enjoy myself until I knew that I could keep Tess safe. “But if she’s… not being… sensible?” “Don’t worry,” Mistress said sternly. “It’s not your business unless she’s putting her health at risk. And if she is, well, then I will deal with the situation.” I couldn’t help grinning then; partly from the sheer power Ffrances was showing in her voice, but partly from knowing that everything was going how I had hoped. Tess was going to be my baby again; and I had won. 148. My Guilt Trip As we continued watching the movie, I found it hard to pay attention to the screen. Ffrances seemed to be doing everything in her power to distract me; and it really surprised me when I realised that I’d even noticed. When we had first started dating, there had been so many movies that I didn’t even look at, because I was so taken with my beautiful lover. Maybe that was an indicator of why Tags and Striker were so popular; or maybe it was because I was growing as a person, and I actually cared about the things that my fiancée enjoyed just as much as I wanted her body and her discipline. I was glad that I’d finally started getting into the comics that brought Ffrances so much enjoyment. Another reason that I should be grateful for Tess’s presence here, and try extra hard to make sure that my little one was safe from any contact with adult needs. Now, even with Ffrances’s lips on my skin, I was taking in some of the plot of the movie. And at the same time, I think there were a lot of little bits that I would have missed, if it weren’t for Tess and Spike occasionally skipping back to review the crucial scenes. At those moments, everybody wanted to talk about what we’d seen, and what it might be pointing to later. Time passed, and the entertainment didn’t get any less gripping. But it wasn’t too long before I was sure that Tess would have started to squirm for real. She’d had several drinks, and I wanted to make sure that Ffrances noticed Tess needed to go before she actually wet herself. I tore my eyes away from the screen, and looked over to the sofa where Tess and Spike were sitting. They were a lot closer than I had expected them to be, and that still made me a little worried. But it was clear that it wasn’t her friend’s arm around her that was making Tess uncomfortable. She pressed her legs together and shifted position constantly, but made no move to pause the DVD. She skipped back sometimes if she wanted to make sure she took in all the details of what we were watching, and there was an occasional pause because we were talking about how well we thought the actors on the screen fitted the characters from the comics, but she hadn’t called for a bathroom break. It was working perfectly. Tess couldn’t know just how long this DVD was. She would keep on trying to hold it, because to relieve herself would mean that she couldn’t have an accident as instructed. And because it was supposed to be a surprise this time, she couldn’t even realise that. But maybe I was only noticing the way she was moving because I was already expecting it. I needed to do something to make it a little more obvious; so Ffrances would finally accept that Tess’s obsession with losing control without regressing was harmful. It was hard to keep my mind on Tess, when Todd Lynchblud was giving such a convincing performance as Don Cassarone. Even knowing the vague story of The Biker, the Don, and the Pope, and what was about to happen next, it was hard not to get caught up in the angst of this guy wondering if his son was contemplating the assassination of his adopted sons. He was a great actor, and looked distinguished even with his distinguished silver hair slicked back and dyed. The fact that he showed up in a suit that may as well have been his costume even for the first table reads of the script showed just how seriously this guy was throwing himself into the role; and that kind of method acting really made it easy to empathise with the don. I looked up at Tess, and saw that she was still shifting in her seat. I didn’t want to interrupt, knowing that we were all about to be startled by the appearance of the hitman even if we knew it was coming. But I guessed that Ffrances would find a suitable place to call a break if I gave her a reason. “Mistress?” I whispered, and then cursed myself silently. I didn’t need to be in that kind of headspace right now. I wanted to be the one making suggestions, not taking orders. But when she’d been discreetly biting me as the movie went on, it was hard to think of myself as anything but a toy. “I uhh… Tess doesn’t look comfortable. But she’s not saying anything. Do you think if we take a bathroom break, she’ll be able to go too? I don’t like seeing her uncomfortable, and I guess there’s some reason she doesn’t want to –” I’d expected her to think about it, but I didn’t think she would interrupt me by addressing the room. “Wow, can we take a little break?” she said. “Sorry. It’s just, I think I can’t be the only one who needs a bathroom break. Has it really been two hours already?” “Really?” Tess asked sarcastically, like she couldn’t believe anybody would need to pee so soon. Completely ignoring her own desperation, of course. I only hoped that the discrepancy between her words and her actions was enough to convince Ffrances. She expanded on that a little, saying that she didn’t think we’d gotten so far into the movie, and she was surprised to see that it was two whole hours already. I could understand that surprise; even with the number of parts we’d rewatched, you might expect it to be coming to the end by now. And I didn’t want to make them any more suspicious if I could avoid it; so maybe I needed to explain that this would be a little longer than most movies. “Kind of get carried away, don’t you?” I said nonchalantly. “I think that’s the thing with this being the dailies. They want to have every scene they might need. Then some parts make it into the final cut, and some for the director’s cut, and whatever. They need to have all the parts before they can cut it down. I think we have to be pretty near the end, though. I mean, the gang’s all assembled.” “What about Pope Luke?” Spike pointed out. Of course, she was right. The Pope hadn’t even had a speaking part yet; so anyone who’d read even part of the comic books knew that Cassarone’s climactic fight was going to be a big fakeout. And that was enough to get them speculating again about which characters were going to be a part of the dream sequence, and whether the movie was following the plot of Canon Flash or the revised version that was incorporated into Unterminated Ring. But Tess was squirming now; I didn’t want to get distracted in the middle of my plan. “Anyway,” I said. “Bathroom break.” I went to the upstairs bathroom, while Ffrances headed to the downstairs toilet. It might have been better to let Tess go first, but I figured that Ffrances wouldn’t want to make it too obvious that she’d called this break for the sake of our little one. When I got to the bathroom I looked at the mirror, and asked myself if I was really doing the right thing. It was clear that this was bothering Tess, and I really didn’t want to hurt her. But I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind, telling myself that it was all for her own good in the end. She needed to stop fighting, and to let go of the pressure to act like an adult. This was the only way she could be happy, I told myself. She needed to accept that she wasn’t in control of the situation now, and that couldn’t happen while Ffrances felt obliged to keep enabling her. “It’s just once,” I told myself. “It’s only to make a point. I don’t like making her hold it, but it’s the only way Ffrances will understand that Tess needs help.” The words sounded hollow, and for a moment I thought about just letting Tess grow up. But she needed my support, and I couldn’t just interrupt this plan in the middle. But this was the end now; everything would get easier after today. From the top of the stairs, I heard Spike’s voice, asking Tess if she needed to pee. Of course, she said no. She even sounded a little annoyed by the question; which I guessed would be natural if she really didn’t understand how badly she needed to go. I hurried downstairs, listening to the conversation as I went. I heard Ffrances’s voice move back from the kitchen to the lounge as they carried on talking; and Tess’s offer to refill everybody’s drinks. When I got downstairs, I could see into the kitchen. The drinks were on the counter; Tess was standing at the lounge doorway with her back to me, talking to Spike about whatever joke she had just made. I knew it was risky, but I was sure that today would be a lot easier for Tess if it was resolved sooner rather than later, and I didn’t want her to keep on waiting much longer. I darted into the kitchen behind her, and opened the pack of pills that I had seen before. I told myself that the addition of a diuretic to her drink would just mean that she couldn’t hold it for as long, reducing her discomfort overall. It was for her own good, really, and if I kept on telling myself that, maybe I could keep on believing it as well. I left the pack of pills visible as well; if Ffrances came in later, she would see it out on the counter, like someone hadn’t taken proper care when putting it away, and she would know that Tess had been the only person in the kitchen since she was last there. That by itself should be enough to convince her that I’d been right all along. The deed done, and wishing that I didn’t have to resort to tricks like this, I darted back out into the hallway and immediately opened the door to the lounge. Tess came through from the kitchen a second later, walking slowly with her legs pressed together, but apparently oblivious to her own pain. “Oh, thanks,” I said as she handed me a fresh drink. She’d gotten one for everybody of course. “Always thinking of others. Such a good girl. You can go potty then we’ll carry on, okay?” “I’m not a baby!” she snapped, the catchphrase that I’d heard a dozen times since she moved in here. And then she followed it up with “I’m fine for now, I can wait until the movie ends.” “You sure?” I asked. “Think there’s some part of you that’s hoping you’ll have an accident and wind up feeling like a little baby before the end?” I glanced over at Spike; but I guess she thought that was just regular teasing. And to Ffrances, of course, it would seem that I was asking Tess if she wanted to have an accident, without making it too obvious to Spike. That would make it easier for her to assume that I hadn’t already given the trigger, even if I hated deceiving my fiancée like this. “No!” Tess snapped, anger visible in her eyes. I was sure she thought that being so forceful would convince me that she was an adult, who didn’t need me looking out for her. But in the circumstances, the same expression would be a clear signal to Ffrances that she was risking her health in order to indulge some hidden desperation fantasy; it could only be a reason to doubt her maturity. She pressed the ‘play’ button to resume the movie before I could apologise; and I was sure that she’d made the point better than I ever could. It wasn;t long before Spike called for another bathroom break. I was glad, because it meant that I didn’t need to say the words. She suggested that Tess needed to go, and of course Tess denied it. That was the best possible outcome, as far as I was concerned. While she was obviously uncomfortable, there was no way Ffrances could not be assuming that Tess had some desire to lose control, in spite of all her insistence about not being a baby. “Tess,” Spike said patiently. “I can feel you squirming next to me. You don’t need to do all the chores, you should go to the bathroom.” “No, I’m serious,” Tess answered, and from the way she was sitting nobody could possibly have believed her. I felt bad again; this time because I didn’t want Spike to see this. As much as Tess needed to give up on the irrational feeling that she had to be a big girl, I felt that letting her girlfriend see her like this was too much. I didn’t want to humiliate her; and even if their relationship was obstructing Tess’s ongoing regression, I didn’t want to create discord between them any more than was absolutely necessary. Tess went through to the kitchen; I guess she wanted to hide her embarrassment as well. Ffrances followed, and I was racking my brain, trying to find any excuse to keep Spike from following. I wanted to convince Tess that she needed to be a baby; or convince Ffrances that our little girl shouldn’t have the choice. Humiliating her in front of someone whose opinion she cared about had never been part of the plan. “I think they’ve got something more serious to talk about,” I said. “No, I…” Spike mumbled, and for the first time I realised just how hard this must be for her as well, even if she didn’t know all the details. “I think Tess is… I don’t know. But she’s clearly not comfortable. And she said that I have the authority, if she’s not looking after herself. I need to be there, in case there’s something I can say to make a difference. I'm even wondering if she wants to test whether I can take responsibility.” I wanted to argue, but I knew it was true. Tess had given Spike the responsibility. And perhaps Spike had some of the instincts of a natural Daddy figure as well; she could persuade Tess to accept the things that she’d never voluntarily give in to. And I knew better than anyone that Ffrances set hard and fast rules about consent. If she was worried about Tess, it was Spike who would have the deciding vote now. “Okay,” I said. “But don’t you dare embarrass my little girl.” After she went into the kitchen, it was a few minutes before I had the courage to move closet to the door, so that I could listen to their conversation. And the first words I heard clearly were the best that I could imagine, saving Tess from her pain while also taking away her choice. “Are you going to go? No? Then… Tess, have an accident.” I had won; Tess would be a baby now, even if she felt like she wanted to fight it. I wouldn’t need to hurt my baby any more, and that was a huge load off my mind.