My experience with Autism and wanting diapers

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

Hello there, I have visited this site for several years but I haven't really posted much. I feel like sharing my experience will give an opportunity to help someone else. If anyone has any questions, I will try my best to respond.

 

I remember being toilet trained around 4 years old and I felt confused about leaving my diapers behind. I believe as part of my anxiety and also having sensory processing issues, it caused me to have severe constipation for years. I ended up having frequent bowel accidents, and sometimes I would fall asleep in the middle of class then wake up with a large BM in my briefs. It made me feel embarrassed and frustrated. I was never offered the chance to wear diapers or pull ups in school and I wish I did because it would saved me a lot of stress.

Back then I only understood that diapers were for babies, so I was too afraid to ask about getting diapers.

 

In 5th grade right before I started middle school I started experimenting with standing over the toilet and peeing through my briefs, which I later learned caused an unpleasant smell around others. I don't remember anyone saying anything about it, but I definitely felt embarrassed. Also around this time I finally stopped having less bowel accidents.

 

When I started middle school around 2010 they limited how many times people were allowed to go to the toilet for every 9 weeks. To this day as an adult I still find this unreasonable for anyone at any age. I won't go into detail too much but I'm thankful I didn't have any accidents in middle school.

However around the time I was in 8th grade I started taking old Tena unused pull ups from a family member that didn't need them. Those were too large for my body so I tried ordering a sample grey depends pull up in the mail. I wore it to school on a day I didn't realize was a choir field trip. I was absolutely terrified but I managed to make it through the day without any noticeable leaks, but I might have smelled like pee.

After that day I tried my best to stop thinking about wanting diapers but it was in my mind every day. Then there was one time at the end of that year a scented unused baby diaper got into my messenger bag and the smell was noticeable in a very small classroom. A family member put it in my bag by mistake. I cried a lot when I got home.

 

My personality has been very introverted and quiet, but in addition to not having strong social skills and anxiety I also realized that I was gay and I was not in a safe environment for this. At the end of my freshman year of high school, I was finally given the opportunity to go to a new school that had a social strategies class. I stopped thinking about diapers as often and put focus into my classes. I ended up graduating from high school with no diapers and no accidents.

 

About a year after finishing school I became friends with someone that helped me buy my first pack of Walmart pull ups. They were very understanding of my autism and didn't judge me by what I wanted to wear under my clothes.

 

Fast forward to now and I recently started getting a regular shipment of pull ups. I'm not incontinent, however at one point someone in the past physically hurt me after I finished using the toilet at home and that trauma caused me to develop anxiety over going to the toilet nearly anywhere.

 

Also the fact public restrooms can be very loud with many people coming in and out can feel exhausting for my brain to process. Also dealing with the loud hand dryers can be a challenge. I've tried earplugs but I'm not sure if I want to carry those around in my pocket all the time.

 

I do not wear 24/7, I still wear regular boxers more often than pull ups. I don't feel like I have a bladder problem, but I want to have a relationship with someone else and I know that diapers and pull ups can get in the way of intimacy. If anyone has any advice for me, I'd really appreciate it.

 

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[Dylan992]

Wearing them  get rid of Anxiety. I was in the same boat as you I am a aspie

Edited June 17, 2020 by Dylan992
Misspell

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

Wearing them please get rid of Anxiety. I was in the same boat as you I am a aspie

Are you saying that I should wear them more often? I'm slightly confused by your response?

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[TGalactic2012]

Hello there, I have visited this site for several years but I haven't really posted much. I feel like sharing my experience will give an opportunity to help someone else. If anyone has any questions, I will try my best to respond.
 
I remember being toilet trained around 4 years old and I felt confused about leaving my diapers behind. I believe as part of my anxiety and also having sensory processing issues, it caused me to have severe constipation for years. I ended up having frequent bowel accidents, and sometimes I would fall asleep in the middle of class then wake up with a large BM in my briefs. It made me feel embarrassed and frustrated. I was never offered the chance to wear diapers or pull ups in school and I wish I did because it would saved me a lot of stress.
Back then I only understood that diapers were for babies, so I was too afraid to ask about getting diapers.
 
In 5th grade right before I started middle school I started experimenting with standing over the toilet and peeing through my briefs, which I later learned caused an unpleasant smell around others. I don't remember anyone saying anything about it, but I definitely felt embarrassed. Also around this time I finally stopped having less bowel accidents.
 
When I started middle school around 2010 they limited how many times people were allowed to go to the toilet for every 9 weeks. To this day as an adult I still find this unreasonable for anyone at any age. I won't go into detail too much but I'm thankful I didn't have any accidents in middle school.
However around the time I was in 8th grade I started taking old Tena unused pull ups from a family member that didn't need them. Those were too large for my body so I tried ordering a sample grey depends pull up in the mail. I wore it to school on a day I didn't realize was a choir field trip. I was absolutely terrified but I managed to make it through the day without any noticeable leaks, but I might have smelled like pee.
After that day I tried my best to stop thinking about wanting diapers but it was in my mind every day. Then there was one time at the end of that year a scented unused baby diaper got into my messenger bag and the smell was noticeable in a very small classroom. A family member put it in my bag by mistake. I cried a lot when I got home.
 
My personality has been very introverted and quiet, but in addition to not having strong social skills and anxiety I also realized that I was gay and I was not in a safe environment for this. At the end of my freshman year of high school, I was finally given the opportunity to go to a new school that had a social strategies class. I stopped thinking about diapers as often and put focus into my classes. I ended up graduating from high school with no diapers and no accidents.
 
About a year after finishing school I became friends with someone that helped me buy my first pack of Walmart pull ups. They were very understanding of my autism and didn't judge me by what I wanted to wear under my clothes.
 
Fast forward to now and I recently started getting a regular shipment of pull ups. I'm not incontinent, however at one point someone in the past physically hurt me after I finished using the toilet at home and that trauma caused me to develop anxiety over going to the toilet nearly anywhere.
 
Also the fact public restrooms can be very loud with many people coming in and out can feel exhausting for my brain to process. Also dealing with the loud hand dryers can be a challenge. I've tried earplugs but I'm not sure if I want to carry those around in my pocket all the time.
 
I do not wear 24/7, I still wear regular boxers more often than pull ups. I don't feel like I have a bladder problem, but I want to have a relationship with someone else and I know that diapers and pull ups can get in the way of intimacy. If anyone has any advice for me, I'd really appreciate it.
 
Sent from my Pixel 4 using Tapatalk
 
 

I have Autism Spectrum Disorder Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Pervasive Development Disorder Not Otherwise Specified

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[Fleetwoodmac32192]

I have Autism Spectrum Disorder Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Pervasive Development Disorder Not Otherwise Specified

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I was diagnosed with PDD-NOS when I was 3 but I got diagnosed with Autism when I was 18.

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[TGalactic2012]

I was diagnosed with PDD-NOS when I was 3 but I got diagnosed with Autism when I was 18.

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Im also incontinent meds mainly

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[Firefly 35]

7 hours ago, Fleetwoodmac32192 said:

Are you saying that I should wear them more often? I'm slightly confused by your response?

Sent from my Pixel 4 using Tapatalk
 

I think what @Dylan992 meant is that diapers can help lower anxiety. 

 

15 hours ago, Fleetwoodmac32192 said:

If anyone has any advice for me, I'd really appreciate it.

I would say just try to be yourself.  You never know if/when you'll find the right person for you.

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

I would say just try to be yourself.  You never know if/when you'll find the right person for you.

Thanks, I have been struggling with constipation lately and even though I have tried drinking more water and taking fiber I still feel stuck sometimes. I've been thinking about trying to make sure I poop more often but it's been a challenge. It's really hard to be social when my gut really makes me feel fatigue.

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

Im also incontinent meds mainly

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Would you say being incontinent makes you sad? Does autism impact your incontinence?

[TGalactic2012]

Would you say being incontinent makes you sad? Does autism impact your incontinence?

Not really I’m not sure if my Autism causes my incontinence but ive read that Autism can cause incontinence


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[Diapered Jason]

I recommend wearing headphones, the kind that go around your ear. That will help with the noise and be more comfortable that ear plugs.

I might have aspergers (not diagnosed yet), but my son has a more similar autism diagnosis with anxiety like you, and it is very hard. Medication has helped him out tremendously, but still have to work with him quite a bit.

Now for dating, you just got to get yourself out there and tell people exactly what you want in a relationship and be honest about it. I recommend local kink events and you might be more comfortable with the lower key munches for example, because there are not as many people. Tell everyone what you are looking for and eventually you'll meet someone.

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

I recommend wearing headphones, the kind that go around your ear. That will help with the noise and be more comfortable that ear plugs.
I might have aspergers (not diagnosed yet), but my son has a more similar autism diagnosis with anxiety like you, and it is very hard. Medication has helped him out tremendously, but still have to work with him quite a bit.
Now for dating, you just got to get yourself out there and tell people exactly what you want in a relationship and be honest about it. I recommend local kink events and you might be more comfortable with the lower key munches for example, because there are not as many people. Tell everyone what you are looking for and eventually you'll meet someone.

I've worn headphones too, but I still get anxious when I know I have to go to the potty. Especially in a time like now where more public bathrooms are either closed or starting to remove the stall doors.

Does your son get nervous about using the toilet?

[Diapered Jason]

10 minutes ago, Fleetwoodmac32192 said:

I've worn headphones too, but I still get anxious when I know I have to go to the potty. Especially in a time like now where more public bathrooms are either closed or starting to remove the stall doors.

Does your son get nervous about using the toilet?

Not so much now, because we helped him through that, but used to be nervous about flushing because of the sound it made.

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

Not so much now, because we helped him through that, but used to be nervous about flushing because of the sound it made.

I know how that can feel the flushing sound really hurts my ears if it echoes too much.

If a restroom is unavailable I find trying to be comfortable when holding it in to be a challenge. Do they have accidents often?

 

[Diapered Jason]

Probably more so than his peers, because he wouldn't tell us he had to go till the last second, so now we usually tell him to try going every once in awhile, especially when we are out and it has been awhile since he has last gone.

[Fleetwoodmac32192]

Found this great video that explains sensory issues with going to the toilet or wearing protection.

https://youtu.be/tKOXXBBjegI