To Boldly Go

[Bee]

Just an idea I decided to play with. Fanfiction with an additional original character, alien anatomy, mostly something I was writing for myself. But if there's any interest, I'll try to keep it going!

So enjoy!

Bee

* * *

James T Kirk dropped a PADD down on the desk in front of Leonard McCoy. "There's good news and bad news. Which do you want first?"

"The bad news," Leonard replied, leaning back in his chair and examining his best friend. The gold uniform suited him better than the doctor would've thought. He'd always known Jim could pull himself together when he had to, but he was seeing it more and more often now that Jim was officially a Captain. The youngest in the history of Starfleet.

Leonard shook his head. Hard to believe, but they'd let him keep the position. Pike had probably had a lot to do with that.

"Oo, too bad," Jim said, grinning ruefully. "Got to give you the good news first, or the bad news won't make any sense."

Leonard rolled his eyes. "Fine. Good news first then." Jim would insist on doing things his own way.

Jim picked up his own PADD, opening up a file. "Good news is I got to keep the command crew intact. All of us. You're my CMO, Spock'll be the first officer, assuming he agrees. Sulu and Chekov are my pilot and navigator, Uhura's communications officer and Scotty's the Chief Engineer."

Leonard raised both his eyebrows. "Seriously? You got to keep all of us?"

"We'll be on milk runs for a few months, but yeah, I did," Jim replied, his half amused grin showing he knew just how amazing it was. But then again, he'd saved the planet. Maybe it was no surprise Starfleet Command was giving him what he wanted. "And most of us have more experienced officers who'll be sharing shifts with us for a bit."

Leonard nodded thoughtfully. That made sense...incredible performance behind them aside, they were still barely graduated cadets. He just hoped to God he didn't get some idiot trying to tell him how to run his department. "Any other catches?"

"One," Jim said, smiling wryly. "They get to pick the rest of the crew. And you get to give them all physicals. Lucky Bones. You've got the list on your PADD."

"Just great," Leonard replied, scanning the list quickly. "Anyone interesting?"

"A few," Jim said, resting his feet up on the desk. "A couple of our instructors from back at the Academy. A few people I know by reputation." He stretched, and Leonard braced himself. That smirk meant Jim had an ace up his sleeve. "A Tal'assian."

Leonard snorted. "Nice one, Jim. They never take deep space missions." Not that he could blame them, given their species' peculiar biological quirks.

"This one does," Jim replied, his smirk widening. "Dr. Brilara Daran, the new ship's counselor. They tell me she's very good."

"Have to be, to deal with this group of freaks," Leonard muttered, pulling up the file on the woman, now that he had her name.

And yes, there it was. Well educated, degrees from her home planet as well as a few from Earth, possessing the natural empathy of her people...and an accredited Starfleet graduate, eager to serve on the flag ship. "What in God's name possessed her to sign up for this ship of fools?" he asked, scowling into Jim's good natured grin.

"Got me," Jim replied, spreading his hands wide. "But she did, and you're going to have to give her a physical before the ship's cleared. I wonder if it's true what they say about Tal'assian women..."

"Jim, she's an Empath," Leonard said mildly, still reading this Dr. Daran's file. "You go around wondering about things like that, and she'll know it. Keep it in your pants for once, will you?"

Jim heaved a heavy sigh, before grinning brightly again. "Oh well. I got Gaila assigned to us, too."

"Good. At least she can keep up with you." Leonard waved the PADD as the viewer on Jim's desk chimed. "I'll see myself out, Captain."

Jim nodded, already immersed in whatever message was coming in, his easy manner disappearing into a more commanding one. Leonard left him there, heading back to his quarters, turning over the events of the meeting in his mind.

Well, well well. A Tal'assian. He'd have to brush up a bit on their biology, see how much he remembered was actually rumor and how much was truth. Because rumor there was plenty. And the last thing he needed to do was offend the new ship's counselor by believing it.

* * *

Leonard pushed himself back from the monitor, blinking anatomy sketches away from his eyes. He pinched the bridge of his nose, glancing at his PADD, with its unassuming list of new crew members still pulled up. Well. Truth was stranger than fiction, he'd always heard. And this might just prove it.

He now knew for certain that, as Chief Medical Officer, he'd be having to approve and prescribe--of all things--a diaper requisition for Dr. Daran. It wasn't just a rumor, as he'd thought it might be. The Tal'assians were, as a people, incontinent to the last one.

They were humanoid, and in appearance not so different from humans, though they were smaller, averaging under five feet. Their evolution was, by galactic standards, fairly recent, which experts thought might explain the curious lapse in their ability to regulate their excretory processes. Their feces were much like rodents, small, dry pellets that passed with no fuss. But their systems had accommodated to such dry feces with an increase in the production of urine. Time spent as water mammals had only increased this, until the average Tal'assian actively urinated at almost all times.

On their home planet, the native garb accommodated this, providing a variety of choices for collection devices. But as the Tal'assians had encountered other races and taken on space travel, their own designs had proved inappropriate. Leonard had found several that had been created since, including the most recent, which could be programmed into the new replicator technology being installed on the Enterprise.

The fact that it resembled nothing so much as a baby's diaper, however, was not lost on him. True, the compartment for dry feces was unique to the Tal'assian design, and true, the sheer amount and absorbency of the padding required was greater than any child would need, but...it was still a diaper.

And a garment that, according to her own medical records, Dr. Daran didn't go a moment without, expect perhaps when she was bathing. Leonard opened her file, reading the medical records he'd yet to open.

Brilara Daran was, apparently, four foot six, with white hair and the nearly white skin of her people. She was extremely healthy, fit, with no records of major diseases or health problems. After Jim and his allergies, she'd be a breath of fresh air, Leonard had no doubt. In fact, the only thing at all that would--at first glance--take her to sickbay was her incontinence, and that was considered normal for her race.

He read further, intrigued against his will. Dr. Daran exhibited all the usual symptoms of her people. Complete inability to regulate her bowel movements--her anal sphincter relaxed and released whatever pressed against it, whenever it did, involuntarily--and a complete inability to control her urine. In fact, from what he read, she seemed to be one of the many Tal'assians that overproduced that particular waste product, leading to a constant leakage from her body.

Shaking his head, wondering how someone pissing themselves all the time could possibly concentrate on anything else, Leonard pushed the PADD away and headed out. He had better things to do than sit and wonder over alien females.

That was Jim's job, anyway.

* * *

[peelover]

Please write more.

[square_duck]

I 'boldly go" in my diaper too when I need to

this actually sounds fun...keep up the good work

qwack