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Found 9 results

  1. Tonight I’m not doing well. This year has been felt at every level. From my loss of identity to my fight to keep my health benefits just so I have the ability to go to the doctor (at work), I have no social life and the friends I do have are either living life with their families or traveling the world. I feel lost and that I know that my love languages are quality time and physical touch so obviously I am isolated and feel this way. I’m not on any medication because I fear of how. it will affect my job and I know I need to be around people, but I am terrified of being around people and feeling like I am just not worth their time because of how low I feel. I don’t want to be a Debbie downer in conversations or with people and that hurts. I worked all year and didn’t really have any sense of fun, I don’t know how, or am terrified to travel by myself. I am sorry to vent but not sure where else I could.
  2. hello all. I suffer from depression and anxiety. It has gotten extremely worse since that extremely stressful year of 2020. There are some questions that I just cannot find the answers to, no matter how hard I look. Any help or advice would be appreciated. Thank you. I hate who I am but if I attempt to do something that is outside my comfort zone, I have a huge panic attack that basically shuts me down. How can I heal this? My question is, how can someone with depression and/or anxiety even begin to date? All of my research always talks about it as “loving someone with depression”, “dating someone with depression”, or “married to someone with depression”, but it never discusses it from the side of the person with depression. Can anyone help me find any resources that would help me with meeting someone as a person with depression? Because right now, I feel as though there is no hope for me.
  3. I shared on another post about using diapers for fun off and on for years. But often have a feeling of shame. I suffer from anxiety and I find a lot of the time on days I’m feeling anxious I feel the need to use the bathroom a lot only to have a few drops come out. For years I’ve thought about the idea of wearing pull ups on days that I’m feeling really anxious. Just to to relieve that intense urge to urinate. My partner said they support me in wearing pull ups and diapers whenever I feel like I need/want to. Does anyone else use pull ups off and on like that?
  4. I wanted to share this because I know a lot of us on here have anxiety and sensory issues. in 2019, I got a weighted plush for Christmas and I sleep with it in my bed every night, it helps me find rest so much and calms me a lot. For me I am very touch sensitive, and light touches really bother me. I love stuffies, but when they are too soft or too light it can be stressful. These guys are heavy and made of really good 'just soft enough' material. I got mine off etsy from a store that specializes in them; they make scented and unscented ones. For me I got unscented because the smell would irritate me. i had a few issues with the seams opening at the armpits but it was nothing I could not fix with a needle and thread and five minutes. it's held up remarkable well for all the love I have put it through. Mine is 8lbs and it cost 52 dollars and the shipping speed was reasonable. There are other stores and other places you can get them too, but i just wanted to share this wonderful product that makes me feel very happy and calm when I am in my little space at the thoughts that some of you might want to check it out! Hope I am posting this in the right place- I couldnt find a great spot for it. Please let me know if i'm in the wrong one and I will move it. Thanks! Bbbird
  5. I went to therapy for 5 months now, because of my social anxiety, co-dependency. The therapist was not much help, he did not address my emotional damage from years of emotional abuse from my father, and he just went on to tell me that i just need to get a job, or go to college, which i feel too stressed to even think about doing right now. I even tried what he told me, and searched for a job, i did not find a job i was capable of doing, and every time i tried, the anxiety, and stress only got worse. Now my parents are getting a divorce 3 days before Christmas, and my father absolutely refuses to pay child support, because he says that he has provided for them enough, just by taking them to school, which is a ridiculously small amount of support. Since he refuses to pay child support we are going to have to go to court, which is absolutely terrifying to me because of my social anxiety. He also is trying to get custody of my little twin sisters who are both 13, which is causing even more stress, and anxiety because i know he will not emotionally support them, or make sure they are eating right, and i care deeply for my sisters. I have also been trying to find a relationship, because i just can't deny the feeling that i have, that i would be much happier, and maybe even be able to deal with this better, because i would have emotional support. Yet every time i try, people tell me that i need to get therapy and "Fix," myself first before i even think about a relationship. To me, that would be denying my feelings, because it is very important to me to find someone who i will love, and will love me just as much. It's so important to me that i actually cannot stop thinking about it, not even for a day, i don't know why this is, but all i know is i can't distract myself enough to not worry about it, because it's that important to me. Also, i have a ton of pressure on me, because we are very poor right now, we are barely paying our bills, and almost had our electricity and gas shut off, and my parents are expecting me to get a job because i am the only one old enough, and not physically disabled, other than my father, which is looking for a job right now. My older sister which is 21 years old, is always on her computer, every single day, all day, and when my mom tried to suggest going to therapy for the issues that she has, she just flipped out, saying she doesn't even want to try getting help for herself. When i heard that, i just felt so angry, and depressed, because i have been giving it my all to try getting better, and get a job. It's like she doesn't even know how stressed i am about it, or just doesn't care. It is just very, very stressful to know that you are basically the only hope of supporting for the family, and then your only sibling that could possibly help, turns their back on you, probably without even realizing it. And she is older than me by almost 3 years. I am so stressed from all of this, that if my parents even get into a small argument, i get paralyzed from anxiety, and i can't even breath correctly, and then i get really weak, and exhausted afterward. I sometime even start shivering, and can't stop until i calm down. Honestly, i don't even know how much more i can take, or if I'm going to collapse and die from the stress some day. I don't know what it will take to get better anymore. I'm just very confused, and overwhelmed, yet I'm only 19 years old, and i haven't even been able to get on with my life because of all this. I'm sorry if this is a bit much, or long, but it is all the truth.
  6. The school year has started again which brings up a whole host of anxieties. Fear of failing, fear of not fitting in, fear of being an outcast, they are always on my mind. This year my goal was so to be more organized and on top of my studies and social life and i'm already falling behind, each day the work piles up and the anxieties become more crippling. I just don't know how to escape the cycle. Every time i go into class i sit by my friends and feel like an outsider and at this point i don't know if i've brought it onto myself. If i've felt like an outsider for so long i've become one.
  7. I joined this site to connect to people. I've been feeling especially lonely lately and decided I'd really like to talk to some like-minded people, maybe even make a few friends. The problem with this is that I suffer from Avoidant personality disorder and Social Anxiety disorder. This makes it difficult sometimes to reach out and socialize. I want to....but at times my fear overwhelms me and I have to hold myself back. I have such feelings of shame and self loathing. I long to be with people, have friends, laugh and have adventures but I can't. I'm trying. At least I'm trying. I don't know how long I'll stay active on this site before what I call my "black cloud" overtakes me again. I'm just wondering if anyone else feels like this. Is there anyone else who has a disorder that makes it difficult, even painful, to be around people and interact with people? Is there anyone else who doubts their own self worth so much that they actively avoid relationships?
  8. I have an anxiety/panic disorder that has really be acting up lately so I think it is time to find myself a therapist in my area(I have moved recently). Anyway, I would really like to find a therapist who is AB friendly. I would like to be able to discuss diapers as one of my coping mechanisms without the therapist trying to "fix" the AB part of me that I have no interest in "fixing", and have that distract from the real issue of the anxiety. So if anyone has any experience with this I would love any advice I can get. And if anyone knows of any AB friendly therapists in the Bay Area private message me and let me know. Thanks for your help!
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