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“Well, work is work” Johann thought as he walked down the line of modules. He was walking along a steel hallway, carrying a briefcase, and doing what amounted to a check in the box inspection job. At least he was getting paid. As a chief engineer aboard a Star Force Explorer vessel, he had become used to a much more exciting lifestyle. Travelling the stars, vising new planets, fighting pitched battles against pirates and invaders… the kind of things he had signed up for. However, all away postings have to end at some point, and he rotated back to more conventional duties until it was his turn to leave again.So now here he was, monitoring Care Modules. He walked along the steel floored hallway and approached a random one on his right and set his briefcase down. There was a desk with a variety of gleaming buttons, and he hit the central one.A large screen door, invisible until now, appeared in front of him and slid upward. He hit the reinforced plastic behind it, ensuring it was secure, then hit a switch. A light came on, revealing a large and seemingly empty room behind.“Alight, let’s see if this all works” he said to himself. The rooms were kept empty not in use in order to prolong their lifespan. However, that could change in a second.He hit a button and began switching through a list. With it, the room changed. The walls turned from a dull grey to black, then blue, then pink, then red, and through a rainbow of colors, textures, and designs with paintings and murals appearing at will. He turned to a different list, and carpeting appeared on the floor, only to be replaced with tiles, rugs, wood, and dozens of other materials. He turned another, and furniture appeared, making an ordinary bedroom, a hospital, a prison cell, a nursery, a children’s bedroom, and more all along set designs. The idea of the machine is that it could be used as support for almost anyone, for almost any need, and in almost any situation. It could be a room to satisfy almost any need or desire aboard a ship or on the planet, then switch to something different when the next occupant came in. Johann’s job was to ensure it was all working properly before a tour came through the next day, which would include inspectors to give it final approval. As it was, several of them were already occupied, so his work was merely formality.“Alright, that is all in order. Now let’s see what else you got,” he said. He hit a button, and steel arms came out of the walls, protruding from every corner. He turned on a microphone and spoke into it. “Computer, recognize my voice.”There was a series of beeps followed by “RECOGNIZE, JOHANN,” n a mechanical voice. An image of himself in his flight suit came up, looking slender, with long brown hair.“Damn I look good,” he said, secretly wishing he could be back in that flight suit.“COMMENCING “LOOKING GOOD” PATTERN,” the voice said. Smooth jazz music came on, along with robotic dancing. Hands came out of the desk full of make up.“NO NO CANCEL CANCEL!” he said, and the machine stopped.Being careful not to mutter to himself, he bent over and opened his briefcase. A small robot, made of steel bars and wires, jumped out. It straightened up and quickly grew to a full adult’s height. It then began to flesh out, with rubber balloons inflating in the place of skin. A crude imitation of a man, but good enough for his work.He hit a button on the desk, and a door appeared in the wall. He unlocked it, then spoke to the robot.“Get in,” he said, and the robot obeyed. He shut the door behind it, and locked it.“Computer, prison setting,” he said.A series of beeps followed, then “PRISON SETTING ACKNOWLEDGED.” The room changed to a deep blue with simple furniture.He held down a button which deactivated the arms. “Robot, try to get out,” he said.The robot banged on the glass and on the door with twice the strength a human could muster. None of them budged.Johann released the buttons controlling the arms. In an instant they sprang to life and wrapped themselves around the robot, suspending him helplessly in the air.“Excellent. Computer, hospital setting.”“HOSPITAL SETTING ACKNOWLEDGED.” The room changed to a white hospital room, and the arms lay the robot on a bed while a light scanned him for medical problems.“Alright, robot, trip and fall, demonstrate “broken arm.”The robot didn’t move.He spoke louder. “Robot, trip and fall, demonstrate ‘broken arm.”The robot remained lying in the bed as arms took care of and shook its head at Johann. It put its arms behind its head and let out an automated sigh.“Damn lazy robot,” Johann said.He walked into the room.“Robot, leave this room!”The robot stuck its ‘tong’ out at him. The robot was a highly developed, extremely expensive tool, and knew it. It was far from beyond sass. If this was a malfunction, it would come down on Johann’s head.“INSTRUCTIONS NOT UNDERSTOOD,” the computer said.“No, I want this robot out of the room!” Johann said.“UNDERSTOOD, REMOVING ROBOT.”A whole appeared in the roof, and the arms tossed the robot half a mile into the sky.“Oh s&$%....” Johann said, watching his career fly away with an overpriced jackass of a robot.“INSTRUCTIONS UNDERSTOOD,” the room said. A toilet appeared, and the arms picked up Johann and pulled him toward it.“NO NO! I’m not going to use the toilet.”“INSTRUCTIONS UNDERSTOOD. ALTERNATIVE MEANS ENGAGED.” A tube came out of the wall“NOOO not that!” Johann said. He didn’t even want to know what the tube was for. “Just put me down.”“UNDERSTOOD,” the arms dropped Johann with a hard ‘thump’ onto the ground.He sat down to think. “God damn this thing destroyed the robot… it was like my boss’s baby… he said take care of it… they are going to HATE me, probably punish me, give me the 10th degree… probably won’t leave earth again…”“UNDER NOT UNDER NO UNDER NOT STOOD UNDER NOT STOOD NOT NOT STOOD UNDER” the voice said. Johann jumped up, and realized he was still muttering to himself. The arms were spinning around, struggling to find some meaning in his words.Johann began to panic. This was worst case scenario, he had caused a malfunction. “NO! STOP LISTENING TO ME!” he shouted.“UNDERSTOOD. JOHANN NO LONGER ACCEPTED VOICE CONTROL.”“What?” he said, color draining from his face. The computer didn’t say a thing.“REVERTING TO MOST LIKELY SETTING.” The machine made a long string of beeps and static noise, then began repeating his last words. “ALTERNATIVE TOILETRY MEANS… WON”T GET OUT… TAKE CARE OF IT… PUNISH… BOSS’S BABY… DOORS LOCKED, NURSERY MODE ACTIVATED.”“WHAT!” Johann shouted as arms seized him. The walls around him changed to a baby blue with colorful cartoon character’s dancing around it."This... can't... be... happening..." he said, while reality confirmed that it could, in fact, be happening.He made a scramble for the door, and slammed into the now solid wall that replaced it. Arms grabbed him from all sides and lifted him strait into the air."No NO NO! I"M NOT A BABY!" he said, as he was carried toward a changing table."YOU ARE A BABY, AND WILL BE TREATED AS SUCH. ARE YOU THROWING A TANTRUM?" the machine said."I"m NOT throwing a tantrum! I'm an adult put me... MPH..." he was cut off as a large pacifier was shoved into his mouth. He spat it out, only to find it instantly replaced and attached behind his head with ribbons."What sort of nursery is this?" he thought."NAUGHTY BABY. GOOD BABIES DON"T THROWN TANTRUMS. SUCKLE THAT AND BE A GOOD BOY OR YOU'LL GET A SPANKING. ANY MORE LIES ABOUT BEING AN ADULT WILL RESULT IN MOUTH SOAPINGS"Ridiculous. The machine couldn't spank a baby... could it? That be abuse...He watched the thick steel arms circle around. He didn't want to test it.The arms settled him down on the table. The stripped him naked, taking his clothes back through the walls. He groaned as he saw their replacements. A thick white diaper, sized for himself and cartoonishly decorated came out. A baby blue teddy bear shirt with pink ruffles at the sleeves and "Baby Boy" written on the chest followed, along with finger less mittens.The arms were efficient, he had to give them that. He was very quickly powdered, diapered, and dressed to the machine's specifications. He sat up, getting used to the new sensations. The thickness of the diaper forced his legs apart, and any movement was accompanied by the loud crinkling of plastic. However, the sweet smell of the powder, along with the softness of the padding and the t-shirt made it comfortable.The machine lifted him up and set him down on the ground amid a pile of toys."NOW BE A GOOD BABY AND PLAY UNTIL SUPPER TIME."Not likely, he thought. The second the hands moved away he stood up and reached for the tapes of his diaper. He grabbed at them on impulse, not thinking through.This quickly proved for a mistake for two reasons. First, he found that his now mittened hands were near useless when it came to opening tapes. HE had a moment to contemplate this before the second reason came crashing across his padded backside."MPH!" he yelped against the pacifier as he was hoisted into the air. Dread filled him, and he realized the machine might just make good on its promise.A scan went over him. "ASSESSING PAIN TOLERANCE" it said.Pain tolerance? he thought. It couldn't... no...Johann watched in horror as one of the hands raised itself behind him. He closed his eyes.THWACK! he felt and heard, as the hand slammed down on him. "BAD BABY! BAD BABY!" The machine said, over and over as it spanked him.This can't be happening! he thought. They wouldn't spank an actual baby! What is this?The machine continued, putting Johann into more and more agony. He felt his bottom get blistered, and slowly broke down from yelping into loud sobs.Finally the spanking ended. The machine turned him back over and craddled him comfortably, rocking him back and forth. A finger waggled in front of him."THERE THERE. GOOD BABIES KEEP THEIR DIAPERS ON. HAVE YOU LEARNED YOUR LESSON?"Johann nodded."GOOD. IT IS TIME FOR FEEDING. PREPARING MEAL WITH LESSON 24B: DIAPER NECESSITY."Johann's eyes went wide as he was sat down with a crinkle and a thud at a high chair. He barely even noticed his aching bottom. Lesson? Diaper necessity? What fresh hell could that be?The machine removed his pacifier, and he tried to ask the question but was silenced as a spoon full of sugary-sweet mush was shoved into his mouth. "OPEN FOR THE AIRPLANE!" One of the machine's hands held his head as the others spooned more and more into him fast enough to almost make him gag."Wait! MPH..Let me MDSGE.... SPEAK! MPHHHHH." Every time he swallowed one spoonful, another one was instantly behind it, giving him no pause to finish speaking. He tried to spit some out, but the machine simply scooped it up and kept going. He was forced to continuously swallow what he imagined was mashed fruits and vegetables with oatmeal- as strange, gooey substance clearly intended for babies. But no one would feet a baby like this? They wouldn't treat one this roughly, would they?Soon the bowl was finished, and Johann felt stuffed with the massive amount of goo so quickly shoved into him. The hands then grabbed the bottle and lifted him out of the chair."WAIT!" he shouted.Miraculously, the machine paused."What is this.. lesson... thing... you are giving me?""LESSON 24B: DIAPER NECESSITY""Yes! What is that?"LESSON 24B: DIAPER NECESSITY. USED FOR BABIES WHO ATTEMPT TO REMOVE THEIR DIAPERS OR ARGUE AGAINST THEM. IN ORDER TO INSTRUCT BABIES ON THE IMPORTANCE OF THEIR DIAPERS AND PUNISH FOR THE SAME TRANSGRESSION. THE BABY IS GIVEN SUPPLEMENTS TO ENSURE DIAPER USAGE, THEN KEPT INSIDE THEM."Johann's eyes went wide. "WHAT!? You can't... MPHHHH!" He was cut off once again as the bottle was shoved into his mouth. He glared at the arms, waited a moment, and refused to drink."IF THE BABY IS HAVING TROUBLE DRINKING, HE CAN CERTAINLY BE ENCOURAGED." The machine held up a massive wooden paddle.Johann stared at it a moment, and realized the machine wouldn't let him go until he drank anyway. There is no way he'd win a contest of patience with an inanimate object. He sulked, and began to drink.

Elaine peered over the ridge, shielding her eyes slightly as the wind kicked up the dust, she lay low on the ground, a hand clutching the grip of her pistol. The wastelands were deathly quiet, save for the low whistle that was the breeze over the dunes and ridges of the desolate landscape. 'It must be here somewhere…' she thought, reaching inside of her jumpsuit for a crumpled piece of paper. Unfolded, the paper was a very old and incredibly worn-out map, depicting the surrounding area in vague detail at best. This was a pre-war map; it wasn’t likely to include ruins or craters, let alone the location of vaults. She grunted, looking from the map to her surroundings. 'It has to be here, I’m sure!' She thought again, staring at the big red circle drawn on the map, with the numbers -109- scrawled next to it. Elaine had set out over two weeks ago on her expedition to find the elusive vault #109, to which little if any information was known. Even after raiding the Vault-Tech offices she was none the wiser, other than a: the vault existed, and b: it was somewhere here. For a hefty sum, she managed to scrounge a map from a couple of wastelanders who claim to have coordinates to its location, but hasn’t dared gone near it. She bit her lip, thinking of not just the caps she spent but the working condition laser rifle she traded for it too. 'I knew never to trust ghouls' she thought, folding it back up and tucking it back into her jumpsuit. She was a young woman, Elaine. Only just in her twenties, having left her settlement after hearing stories of the vault hunters; wastelanders who travelled to the mysterious nuclear bunkers that dotted the country, raiding them for any pre-war tech and becoming quickly rich in the process. She didn’t want to waste her years flogging junk in Megaton or following in her mother’s footsteps as a Brahmin farmer, she wanted adventure!Steadily getting to her feet, Elaine brushed off the dirt and cautiously walked on, constantly on the lookout for any rogue raiders, or worse, super mut…ANNNNNNTSSSS!!!???She let out a squeal as the ground beneath her gave way with a crumble, falling a few feet and landing with a bruised THUD. “God friggin dammit!” she grumbled, pulling herself up and looking around. She had fallen into what looked like a mineshaft; lots of wooden supports lined the walls and ceiling, which now had a big hole letting in sunlight. Elaine rubbed her backside, groaning, looking back and forth, noticing the tunnel seemingly descending deeper into the ground. She slowly withdrew a small flashlight from her utility belt, flicking it on and moving slowly forward, her pistol raised. After about 50 yards came an abrupt end to the tunnel, a solid wall. Shining her light, she could make out a big grey circle of metal, shaped like a cog…with the numbers 109 in faded yellow writing….THIS IS IT! She beamed, nearly jumping with excitement. The entrance was literally hidden underground! She hurried forward, looking at the door, which stood motionless and still. Putting her ear to the cold metal, she couldn't hear a thing. Though seeing how they were several feet thick, needing to withstand a nuclear holocaust she guessed as much. She moved over to a control panel nearby, blowing a few decades of dust and earth off. She scratched her head for a moment, before pushing and pulling the buttons and levers at random. After only a few presses the door let out a loud mechanical groan, the sound of machinery vibrating through the tunnel, shaking even more dirt from the ceiling. After a minute or so of chugging, the door finally slid aside, steam gushing from the opening mechanism. Pistol raised again, Elaine moved forward into the dimly lit vault. The entrance was nothing special, she had been in two vaults already and this looked no different. All switches, machines and a room off to the side that housed the control room. She moved on, occasionally looking over her shoulder in the event that she was being followed.She gripped the wheel of the only door out, twisting it, opening the door. She threw up her hands as bright white light instantly shone through the door the moment it was cracked open. She covered her eyes in pain as she tried to get used to the brightness, just as a voice spoke.“HI THERE AND WELCOME TO VAULT #109.” She half recognised the voice; it sounded an awful lot like a robot… “CONGRATULATIONS, YOU ARE THE VERY FIRST PERSON TO SET FOOT IN OUR PROUD VAULT SINCE ITS GRAND OPENING WHICH NEVER HAPPENED!” Still grumbling, Elaine peered through her fingers. Standing above her was a big clunky robot, much cleaner and well presented than the ones she was used to dealing with. Also this one wasn't attempting to zap her with a laser beam, which was a rare treat. “First person? What about the past vault dwellers?” Elaine asked, tentatively. “VAULT #109 WAS NEVER OFFICIALLY OPENED BY VAULT TECH!” The robot answered immediately, always speaking with a cheerful woman’s voice, albeit with a typical robotic tone. “DUE TO PRODUCTION ISSUES, SUPPLY ISSUES, REASON ISSUES, AND MANY OTHER ISSUES TOO NUMEROUS, VAULT #109 WAS DEEMED A FAILED PROJECT BEFORE IT HAD BEGUN, AND WAS NOT OPENED TO THE PUBLIC. VAULT TECH ATTEMPTED TO REPURPOSE THE VAULT, BUT WERE UNABLE DUE TO THE NUCLEAR WAR WHICH OCCURRED NOT FIVE DAYS AFTER THE ORIGINAL PLANNED OPENING OF VAULT #109!” Elaine blinked, standing up straight during the machine’s explanation. 'So if this vault has never been opened…the tech inside must be untouched and worth a monumental amount of caps!' She thought, looking around. What vaults she had explored had been ransacked long before, the interiors had rusted over, most of the equipment either missing or no longer in functioning order. This place was a goldmine. “WOULD THE YOUNG LADY CARE TO FOLLOW ME? AFTER OVER 200 YEARS I CAN FINALLY SERVE MY PURPOSE!” The robot turned and began clunking away down the passage. Elaine followed, tucking her pistol into her holster, no longer needing it if the vault has only just opened. The robot lead Elaine further and further in, past a few doors, rounded windows that peered through into pristine computer labs and control rooms, a gentle hum filled the vault as the two of them walked through. After a few minutes they came to a stop, another door slid open before them.“So…what purpose did this vault have, exactly?” Elaine asked, looking around. “Why did Vault Tech decide against opening it for people to use?”“VAULT TECH EVENTUALLY CONCLUDED THAT EXPERIMENTING ON HAVING NO LAVATORIES IN A VAULT WAS DEEMED NECESSARY!” The robot answered straight away.“What? No lavatories? You mean like…no bathrooms?” “VAULT #109 HAS ENOUGH BATHROOMS TO SATISFY THE CLEANING OF ITS MAXIMUM 1000 OCCUPANTS. RATHER IT HAS NO FLUSH LAVATORIES TO DISPOSE OF HUMAN WASTE.”“What the hell? No toilets? What the hell was anyone supposed to do?” Elaine asked, flabbergasted, as they entered the room. “VAULT #109 OCCUPANTS WERE EXPECTED TO WEAR DIAPERS!” said the robot, turning to Elaine. “DIAPERS FOR ANY AND ALL AGES, THEY WERE TO BE RECYCLED IN THE VAULT DIAPER RECYCLER AND REPURPOSED INTO FRESH DIAPERS, MEANING THE VAULT WOULD NEVER RUN OUT!”“B….but that’s ridiculous!” Elaine stammered, shocked at the very idea. “Who the hell thought that would be a good idea?! A hole in the ground filled with 1000 guys dressed like babies?!”“IT WAS THE PURPOSE OF VAULT #109, AND AS OUR FIRST OCCUPANT, YOU HAVE THE PROUD HONOUR OF BEING THE FIRST PERSON TO EXPERIENCE VAULT #109’S PURPOSE!” “What? Are you kidding me??? No way am I letting a crazy robot diaper me, I’m outta here!” Before Elaine could turn to leave a pair of hands clamped around both her arms, she struggled, turning her head to see an identical robot standing directly behind her, its claw-like hands closed tight around Elaine’s arm, as she wrestled fruitlessly against the iron grip.“VAULT #109 OFFERS SEVERAL EXPERIENCES FOR OUR OCCUPANTS!” The first robot continued. “OCCUPANTS CAN CHOOSE TO DIAPER THEMSELVES, OR ALLOW THE SOPHISTICATED VAULT TECH MACHINERY TO PERFORM THE TASK FOR THEM!”“GO TO HELL!!!” Snarled Elaine, still trying to break free from the second machine.”“DOES NOT COMPUTE!” The first robot said. “VAULT TECH MACHINERY WILL PERFORM DEFAULT ACTIONS IN THIS EVENT!” There was a loud whirring sound from behind Elaine, as a second pair of arms extended from the body of the robot holding her still, they moved seamlessly through the air, clamping around Elaine’s legs this time.“STOP IT, LET ME GO NOW!” Elaine screamed, feeling herself being lifted off her feet. The first robot marched forward, raising its own arms now. “PLEASE REMAIN STILL WHILE VAULT #109 TECH SERVES YOU, THANK YOU FOR YOU COOPERATION!” It said, before seizing the front of Elaine’s jumpsuit.“Don’t you things dare touch me, I said NO. STOP!” She cried, seeing the buttons on her suit pop open, her bra now on full display as the machine yanked off her clothes. “LEAVE ME ALONE! STOP THAT! P…PLEASE!” She wailed, as the robot continued stripping her of her outfit. What the robot couldn’t simply peel off, it sliced with a precise zap of its laser, effortlessly undressing Elaine in a matter of seconds. Soon Elaine was just in her underwear, her clothes and equipment now in a jumbled heap on the floor. “ONCE THE OCCUPANT IS COMPLETELY STRIPPED, PROCEED TO PART TWO!” the robot chimed, reaching forward and grabbing her bra in one claw and her panties in the other. “NO! STOOOOOOP!!!” Elaine shrieked, fighting back tears as her underwear were ripped away, leaving her now stark naked, at the mercy of these crazy machines. The robot holding onto her began trundling along on its caterpillar treads, still keeping Elaine aloft in it’s grip, her nude body coming up in goosebumps at the cool air of the vault. The robot carried her towards the big machine that took up most of the room, a conveyer belt sticking out the front like a flat grey tongue. Next thing she knew, Elaine found herself lifted higher into the air and placed upon the rubbery surface of the belt. As she realised she was no longer in the robot’s clutches she instinctively began trying to escape, but the machine had already began whirring and chugging, the belt quickly pulling her into the void of the open hatch, which quickly shut behind her. Plunged into darkness, she shivered, curling up as the belt rolled her into nothingness. As the belt eventually came to halt, lights switched on, momentarily blinding her yet again. Before she could get a grasp on her surroundings more clawed hands seized her limbs. She shrieked again, ignoring the rather unusually soft and gentle grips as they pulled her arms and legs spread-eagled.Elaine could only watch as the arms forced her legs apart, pushing them up towards her chest, exposing everything. “This is insane, stop this PLEEEEAAAASSSSE!!!” she cried. The machine didn’t take any notice, and was poofing some white powder over her bottom and privates. Unable to escape, Elaine stared as the arms finished the powdering, spreading her legs even further. Her knees almost touching her chest, Elaine stared at the thick, white diaper now being unfolded, framed between her legs. “NOOOOOOO!!!” she cried out, her face turning red in an effort to get out of this insane contraption. Unable to move a muscle, the diaper swooped down, and within a matter of seconds, was taped snug around her. “This isn’t happening! THIS ISN’T HAPPENING!” she kept repeating, the diaper thick and poofy between her thighs. She sniffed, stressed tears flowing down her face, she hardly noticed the arms now slipping a vault jumpsuit style diaper-tee onesie over her, stretching her arms up and slipping them through the sleeves, pulling it down her body and snapping the buttons around the diaper, covering everything besides her legs, still bare. The arms finally settled her down upon the conveyer, which kicked into life once again, pulling her snivelling form along, finally popping her out the other end.Falling with a flump upon a soft floor, Elaine looked around. She seemed to be a dormitory of sorts; bunkbeds lined the walls, all of which looked pristine and untouched, the room lit the same as the other. Immediately she reached down, desperately trying to unbutton her onesie and rip off the horrible diaper. She wrenched at the onesie, for all her strength she couldn’t pull the buttons apart, they seemed stuck somehow, either way it wasn’t coming off it seemed. She collapsed, exhausted, red faced and sweating, looking over as another robot clunked into the room, identical to the one that greeted her. “GREETINGS, WOULD THE OCCUPANT CARE FOR SOME REFRESHMENT?” it asked, in the same cheerful female voice. Elaine glared at the thing, fuming. “Do I look like I want a f***ing drink??!!” she snapped. “I want to get out of here!”“I’M SORRY, BUT THE VAULT IS NOW CLOSED, OCCUPANTS ARE NOT PERMITTED TO LEAVE UNTIL THE ALLOTTED TIME HAS PASSED AND THE OUTSIDE IS DEEMED SAFE!” It chirped; its tone still as happy as before. A bottle of purified water dropped from a chute built into the robot’s chest. “TIME FOR YOUR REFRESHMENT!”